THE WORKS OF WILLIAM CARLETON

VOLUME III. 

TRAITS AND STORIES OF THE IRISH PEASANTRY

PART II. 

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CONTENTS:

 The Station. 

 The Party Fight And Funeral. 

 The Lough Derg Pilgrim. 

THE STATION. 

Our readers are to suppose the Reverend Philemy M'Guirk, parish priestof Tir-neer, to be standing upon the altar of the chapel, facing thecongregation, after having gone through the canon of the Mass; andhaving nothing more of the service to perform, than the usual prayerswith which he closes the ceremony. 

"Take notice, that the Stations for the following week will be held asfollows:--

"_On Monday, in Jack Gallagher's of Corraghnamoddagh_. Are you there, Jack?"

"To the fore, yer Reverence. "

"Why, then, Jack, there's something ominous--something auspicious--tohappen, or we wouldn't have you here; for it's very seldom that youmake part or parcel of this _present_ congregation; seldom are you here, Jack, it must be confessed: however, you know the old classical proverb, or if you don't, I do, which will just answer as well--_Non semper ridetApollo_--it's not every day _Manus_ kills a bullock; so, as you arehere, be prepared for us on Monday. "

"Never fear, yer Reverence, never fear; I think you ought to know thatthe grazin' at Corraghnamoddagh's not bad. "

"To do you justice, Jack, the mutton was always good with you, onlyif you would get it better killed it would be an improvement. Get TomMcCusker to kill it, and then it'll have the right smack. "

"Very well, yer Rev'rence, I'll do it. "

"_On Tuesday, in Peter Murtagh's of the Crooked Commons_. Are you there, Peter?"

"Here, yer Reverence. "

"Indeed, Peter, I might know you are here; and I wish that a great manyof my flock would take example by you: if they did, I wouldn't be sofar behind in getting in my _dues_. Well, Peter, I suppose you know thatthis is Michaelmas?"*

 * Michaelmas is here jocularly alluded to as that period of the year when geese are fattest. 

"So fat, yer Reverence, that they're not able to wag; but, any way, Katty has them marked for you--two fine young crathurs, only this year'sfowl, and the ducks isn't a taste behind them--she crammin' them thismonth past. "

"I believe you, Peter, and I would take your word for more than thecondition of the geese. Remember me to Katty, Peter. "

"_On Wednesday, in Parrah More Slevin's of Mullaghfadh_. Are you there, Parrah More?"--No answer. "Parrah More Sle-vin?"--Silence. "Parrah MoreSlevin, of Mullaghfadh?"--No reply. "Dan Fagan?"

"Present, sir. "

"Do you know what keeps that reprobate from mass?"

"I bleeve he's takin' advantage, sir, of the frost, to get in hispraties to-day, in respect of the bad footin', sir, for the horses inthe bog when there's not a frost. Any how, betune that and a bit of asore head that he got, yer Reverence, on Thursday last in takin' partwid the O'Scallaghans agin the Bradys, I bleeve he had to stay awayto-day. "

"On the Sabbath day, too, without my leave! Well, tell him from me, thatI'll make an example of him to the whole parish, if he doesn't attendmass better. Will the Bradys and the O'Scallaghans never be done withtheir quarrelling? I protest, if they don't live like Christians, I'llread them out from the altar. Will you tell Parrah More that I'll hold astation in his house on next Wednesday?"

"I will, sir; I will, yer Reverence. "

"_On Thursday, in Phaddhy Sheemus Phaddhy's of the Esker_. Are youthere, Phaddhy?"'

"Wid the help of God, I'm here, sir. "

"Well, Phaddhy, how is yer son Briney, that's at the Latin? I hope he'scoming on well at it. "

"Why, sir, he's not more nor a year and a half at it yet, and he's gotmore books amost nor he can carry; he'll break me buying books for him. "

"Well, that's a good sign, Phaddhy; but why don't you bring him to metill I examine him?"

"Why, never a one of me can get him to come, sir, he's so much afeard ofyer Reverence. "

"Well, Phaddhy, we were once modest and bashful ourselves, and I'm gladto hear that he's afraid of his clargy; but let him be prepared forme on Thursday, and maybe I'll let him know something he never heardbefore; I'll open his eyes for him. "

"Do you hear that, Briney?" said the father, aside to the son, who kneltat his knee; "you must give up yer hurling and idling now, you see. Thank yer Reverence; thank you, docthor. "

"_On Friday, in Barny O'Darby's, alias Barny Butters_. Are you there, Barny?"

"All that's left of me is here, sir. "

"Well, Barny, how is the butter trade this season?"

"It's a little on the rise, now, sir: in a, month or so I'm expecting itwill be brisk enough. Boney, sir, is doing that much for us anyway. "

"Ay, and, Barny, he'll do more than that for us: God prosper him at allevents; I only hope the time's coming, Barny, when every one will beable to eat his own butter, and his own beef, too. "

"God send it, sir. "

"Well, Barny, I didn't hear from your brother Ned these two or threemonths; what has become of him?"

"Ah, yer Reverence, Pentland done him up. "

"What! the gauger?"

"He did, the thief; but maybe he'll sup sorrow for it, afore he's muchoulder. "

"And who do you think informed, Barny?"

"Oh, I only wish we knew that, sir. "

"I wish I knew it, and if I thought any miscreant here would become aninformer, I'd make an example of him. Well, Barny, on Friday next: but Isuppose Ned has a drop still--eh, Barny?"

"Why, sir, we'll be apt to have something stronger nor wather, anyhow. "

"Very well, Barny; your family was always a dacent and spirited family, I'll say that for them; but, tell me, Barny, did you begin to dam theriver yet? * I think the trouts and eels are running by this time. "

 * It is usual among the peasantry to form, about Michaelmas, small artificial cascades, called dams, under which they place long, deep, wicker creels, shaped like inverted cones, for the purpose of securing the fish that are now on their return to the large rivers, after having deposited their spawn in the higher and remoter streams. It is surprising what a number of fish, particularly of eels, are caught in this manner--sometimes from one barrel to three in the course of a single night!

"The creels are made, yer Reverence, though we did not set them yet; buton Tuesday night, sir, wid the help o' God, we'll be ready. "

"You can corn the trouts, Barny, and the eels too; but should you catchnothing, go to Pat Hartigan, Captain Sloethorn's gamekeeper, and, if youtell him it's for me, he'll drag you a batch out of the fish-pond. "

"Ah! then, you're Reverence, it's himself that'll do that wid a heartan' a half. "

Such was the conversation which took place between the Reverend PhilemyM'Guirk, and those of his parishioners in whose houses he had appointedto hold a series of Stations, for the week ensuing the Sunday laid inthis our account of that hitherto undescribed portion of the Romishdiscipline. 

Now, the reader is to understand, that a station in this sense differsfrom a station made to any peculiar spot remarkable for local sanctity. There, a station means the performance of a pilgrimage to a certainplace, under peculiar circumstances, and the going through a statednumber of prayers and other penitential ceremonies, for the purpose ofwiping out sin in this life, or of relieving the soul of some relationfrom the pains of purgatory in the other; here, it simply meansthe coming of the parish priest and his curate to some house in thetown-land, on a day publicly announced from the altar for that purpose, on the preceding Sabbath. 

This is done to give those who live within the district in which thestation is held an opportunity of coming to their duty, as frequentingthe ordinance of confession is emphatically called. Those who attendconfession in this manner once a year, are considered merely to havedone their duty; it is expected, however, that they should approach thetribunal, * as it is termed, at least twice during that period, that is, at the two great festivals of Christmas and Easter. The observance oromission of this rite among Roman Catholics, establishes, in a greatdegeee, the nature of individual character. The man who, frequents hisduty will seldom be pronounced a bad man, let his conduct and principlesbe what they may in other respects; and he who neglects it, is lookedupon, by those who attend it, as in a state little short of reprobation. 

 * That is, of confession--so going to confession is termed by the priests. 

When the "giving out" of the stations was over, and a few more jestswere broken by his Reverence, to which the congregation paid the tributeof a general and uproarious laugh, he turned round, and resumed theperformance of the mass, whilst his "flock" began to finger their beadswith faces as grave as if nothing of the kind had occurred. When masswas finished, and the holy water sprinkled upon the people, out of atub carried by the mass-server through the chapel for that purpose, thepriest gave them a Latin benediction, and they dispersed. 

Now, of the five individuals in whose houses the "stations" wereappointed to be held, we will select _Phaddhy Sheemus Phaddhy_ forour purpose; and this we do, because it was the first time in which astation was ever kept in his house, and consequently Phaddhy and hiswife had to undergo the initiatory ceremony of entertaining Father_Philemy_ and his curate, the Reverend _Con M'Coul_, at dinner. 

_Phaddhy Sheemus Phaddhy_ had been, until a short time before the periodin question, a very poor man; but a little previous to that event, abrother of his, who had no children, died very rich--that is, for afarmer--and left him his property, or, at least, the greater part of it. While Phaddhy was poor, it was surprising what little notice he excitedfrom his Reverence; in fact, I have heard him acknowledge, that duringall the days of his poverty, he never got a nod of recognition orkindness from Father Philemy, although he sometimes did, he said, fromFather Con, his curate, who honored him on two occasions so far as tochallenge him to a bout at throwing the shoulder-stone, and once toa leaping match, at both of which exercises Father Con, but for thesuperior power of Phaddhy, had been unrivalled. 

"It was an unlucky day to him, " says Phaddy, "that he went to challengeme, at all at all; for I was the only man that ever bate him, and hewasn't able to hould up his head in the parish for many a day afther. "

As soon, however, as Phaddhy became a man of substance, one would almostthink that there had been a secret relationship between his goodfortune and Father Philemy's memory; for, on their first meeting, afterPhaddhy's getting the property, the latter shook him most cordially bythe hand--a proof that, had not his recollection been as much improvedas Phaddhy's circumstances, he could by no means have remembered him;but this is a failing in the memory of many, as well as in that ofFather Philemy. Phaddhy, however, _was no Donnell_, to use his ownexpression, and saw as far into a deal board as another man. 

"And so, Phaddy, " said the priest, "how are all your family?--six youhave, I think?"

"Four, your Rev'rence, only four, " said Phaddy, winking at Tim Dillon, his neighbor, who happened to be present--"three boys an' one girl. "

"Bless my soul, and so it is indeed, Phaddy, and I ought to know it; anhow is your wife Sarah?--I mean, I hope Mrs. Sheemus Phaddhy is well: bythe by, is that old complaint of hers gone yet?--a pain in the stomach, I think it was, that used to trouble her; I hope in God, Phaddhy, she's getting over it, poor thing. Indeed, I remember telling her, lastEaster, when she came to her duty, to eat oaten bread and butterwith water-grass every morning fasting, it cured myself of the samecomplaint. "

"Why, thin, I'm very much obliged to your Rev'rence for purscribin' forher, " replied Phaddhy; "for, sure enough, she has neither pain nor ache, at the present time, for the best rason in the world, docthor, thatshe'll be dead jist seven years, if God spares your Rev'rence an' myselftill to-morrow fortnight, about five o'clock in the mornin'. "

This was more than Father Philemy could stand with a good conscience, soafter getting himself out of the dilemma as well as he could, he shookPhaddhy again very cordially by the hand, saying, "Well, good-bye, Phaddliy, and God be good to poor Sarah's soul--I now remember herfuneral, sure enough, and a dacent one it was, for indeed she was awoman that had everybody's good word--and, between you and me, she madea happy death, that's as far as we can judge here; for, after all, theremay be danger, Phaddy, there may be danger, you understand--however, it's your own business, and your duty, too, to think of that; but Ibelieve you're not the man that would be apt to forget her. "

"Phaddhy, ye thief o' the world, " said Jim Dillon, when Father Philemywas gone, there's no comin' up to ye; how could you make sich a fool ofhis Rev'rence, as to tell im that Katty was dead, and that you hadonly four childher, an' you has eleven o' them, an' the wife in goodhealth?"

"Why, jist, Tim, " replied Phaddhy, with his usual shrewdness, "to tachehis Reverence himself to practise truth a little; if he didn't knowthat I got the stockin' of guineas and the Linaskey farm by my brotherBarney's death, do ye think that he'd notish me at all at all?--nothimself, avick; an' maybe he won't be afther comin' round to me for asack of my best oats, * instead of the bushel I used to give him, andhouldin' a couple of stations wid me every year. "

 * The priest accompanied by a couple of servants each with a horse and sack, collects from such of his parishioners as can afford it, a quantity of oats, varying with the circumstances of the donor. This collection--called _Questing_--is voluntary on the part of his parishioners who may refuse it it they wish; very few are found however, hardy enough to risk the obloquy of declining to contribute, and the consequence is that the custom operates with as much force as if it were legal and compulsory. 

"But won't he go mad when he hears you tould him nothing but lies?"

"Not now, Tim, " answered Phaddhy--"not now; thank God, --I'm not a poorman, an' he'll keep his temper. I'll warrant you the horsewhip won't beup now, although, afore this, I wouldn't say but it might--though thepoorest day I ever was, 'id's myself that wouldn't let priest or friarlay a horsewhip to my back, an' that you know, Tim. "

Phaddhy's sagacity, however, was correct; for, a short time after thisconversation, Father Philemy, when collecting his oats, gave him a call, laughed heartily at the sham account of Katty's death, examined youngBriney in his Latin, who was called after his uncle, pronounced him verycute, and likely to become a great scholar--promised his interest withthe bishop to get him into Maynooth, and left the family, after havingshaken hands with, and stroked down the heads of all the children. 

When Phaddhy, on the Sunday in question, heard the public notice givenof the Station about to be held in his house, notwithstanding hiscorrect knowledge of Father Philemy's character, on which he looked witha competent portion of contempt, he felt a warmth of pride abouthis heart, that arose from the honor of having a station, and ofentertaining the clergy, in their official capacity, under his ownroof, and at his own expense--that gave him, he thought, a personalconsequence, which even the "stockin' of guineas" and the Linaskey farmwere unable, of themselves, to confer upon him. He did enjoy, 'tistrue, a very fair portion of happiness on succeeding to his brother'sproperty; but this would be a triumph over the envious and ill-naturedremarks which several of his neighbors and distant relations had takenthe liberty of indulging in against him, on the occasion of his goodfortune. He left the chapel, therefore, in good spirits, whilst Briney, on the contrary, hung a lip of more melancholy pendency than usual, indread apprehension of the examination that he expected to be inflictedon him by his Reverence at the station. 

Before I introduce the conversation which took place between Phaddhyand Briney, as they went home, on the subject of this literary ordeal, Imust observe, that there is a custom, hereditary in some Irish families, of calling fathers by their Christian names, instead of by the usualappellation of "father. " This usage was observed, not only by Phaddhyand his son, but by all the Phaddys of that family, generally. Theirsurname was Doran, but in consequence of the great numbers in that partof the country who bore the same name, it was necessary as of old, todistinguish the several branches of it by the Christian names of theirfathers and grandfathers, and sometimes this distinction went as farback as the great-grandfather. For instance--Phaddhy Sheemus Phaddhy, meant Phaddhy, the son of Sheemus, the son of Phaddhy; and his son, Briney, was called, Brian Phaddy Sheemus Phaddy, or, _anglice_, Bernardthe son of Patrick, the son of James, the son of Patrick. But the customof children calling fathers, in a viva voce manner, by their Christiannames, was independent of the other more general usage of thepatronymic. 

"Well, Briney, " said Phaddy, as the father and son returned home, cheekby jowl from the chapel, "I suppose Father Philemy will go very deep inthe Latin wid ye on Thursday; do ye think ye'll be able to answer him?"

"Why, Phaddhy, " replied Briney, "how could I be able to answer aclargy?--doesn't he know all the languages, and I'm only in the _FibulaeAEsiopii_ yet. "

"Is that Latin or Greek, Briney?"

"It's Latin, Phaddhy. "

"And what's the translation of that?"

"It signifies the Fables of AEsiopius. "

"Bliss my sowl! and Briney, did ye consther that out of yer own head?"

"Hogh! that's little of it. If ye war to hear me consther _GallusGallinaceus_, a dunghill cock?"

"And, Briney, are ye in Greek at all yet?"

"No, Phaddhy, I'll not be in Greek till I'm in Virgil and Horace, andthin I'll be near finished. "

"And how long will it be till that, Briney?"

"Why, Phaddhy, you know I'm only a year and a half at the Latin, and intwo years more I'll be in the Greek. "

"Do ye think will ye ever be as larned as! Father Philemy, Briney?"

"Don't ye, know whin I'm a clargy I will but I'm only a _lignumsacerdotis_ yet, Phaddhy. "

"What's _ligdum saucerdoatis_, Briney?"

"A block of a priest, Phaddhy. "

"Now, Briney, I suppose Father Philemy knows everything. "

"Ay, to be sure he does; all the languages' that's spoken through theworld, Phaddhy. "

"And must all the priests know them, Briney?--how many are they?"

"Seven--sartainly, every priest must know them, or how could they laythe divil, if he'd, spake to them in a tongue they couldn't understand, Phaddhy?"

"Ah, I declare, Briney, I see it now; only for that, poor Father Philip, the heavens be his bed, wouldn't be able to lay ould Warnock, thathaunted Squire Sloethorn's stables. "

"Is that when the two horses was stole, Phaddhy?"

"The very time, Briney; but God be thanked, Father Philip settled him tothe day of judgment. "

"And where did he put him, Phaddhy?"

"Why, he wanted to be put anundher the hearth-stone; but Father Philipmade him walk away with himself into a thumb-bottle, and tied a stoneto it, and then sent him to where he got a cooling, the thief, at thebottom of the lough behind the house. "

"Well, I'll tell you what I'm thinking I'll be apt to do, Phaddhy, whenI'm a clargy. "

"And what is that, Briney?"

"Why, I'll--but, Phaddhy, don't be talking of this, bekase, if it shouldcome to be known, I might get my brains knocked out by some of theheretics. "

"Never fear, Briney, there's no danger of that--but what is it?"

"Why, I'll translate all the Protestants into asses, and then we'll getour hands red of them altogether. "

"Well, that flogs for cuteness, and it's a wondher the clargy* doesn'tdo it, and them has the power; for 'twould give us pace entirely. But, Briney, will you speak in Latin to Father Philemy on Thursday?"

* I have no hesitation in asserting that the bulk of the uneducatedpeasantry really believe that the priests have this power. 

"To tell you the thruth, Phaddhy, I would rather he wouldn't examine methis bout, at all at all. "

"Ay, but you know we couldn't go agin him, Briney, bekase he promisedto get you into the college. Will you speak some Latin, now till I hearyou?"

"Hem!--_Verbum personaley cohairit cum nomnatibo numbera at persona atnumquam sera yeast at bonis moras voia_. "

"Bless my heart!--and, Briney, where's that taken from?"

"From Syntax, Phaddhy. "

"And who was Syntax--do you know, Briney?"

"He was a Roman, Phaddhy, bekase there's a Latin prayer in the beginningof the book. "

"Ay, was he--a priest, I'll warrant him. Well, Briney, do you mind yerLatin, and get on wid yer larnin', and when you grow up you'll havea pair of boots, and a horse of your own (and a good broadcloth blackcoat, too) to ride on, every bit as good as Father Philemy's, and may bebetther nor Father Con's. "

From this point, which usually wound up these colloquies between thefather and son, the conversation generally diverged into the morespacious fields of science; so that by the time they reached home, Briney had probably given the father a learned dissertation upon theelevation of the clouds above the earth, and told him within howmany thousand miles they approached it, at their nearest point ofapproximation. 

"Katty, " said Phaddhy, when he got home, "we're to have a stationhere on Thursday next: 'twas given out from the altar to-day by FatherPhilemy. "

"Oh, wurrah, wurrah!" exclaimed Katty, overwhelmed at the consciousnessof her own incapacity to get up a dinner in sufficient style for suchguests--"wurrah, wurrah! Phaddhy, ahagur, what on the livin' earth willwe do at all at all! Why, we'll never be able to manage it. "

"Arrah, why, woman; what do they want but their skinful to eat anddhrink, and I'm sure we're able to allow them that, any way?"

"Arrah, bad manners to me, but you're enough to vex a saint--'theirskinful to eat and dhrink!'--you common crathur you, to speak that wayof the clargy, as if it was ourselves or the laborers you war spakingof. "

"Ay, and aren't we every bit as good as they are, if you go tothat?--haven't we sowls to be saved as well as themselves?"

"'As good as they are!'--as good as the clargy!! _Manum a yea agus awurrah!_*--listen to what he says! Phaddhy, take care of yourself, you've got rich, now; but for all that, take care of yourself. You hadbetther not bring the priest's ill-will, or his bad heart upon us. Youknow they never thruv that had it; and maybe it's a short time yourriches might stay wid you, or maybe it's a short time you might stay widthem: at any rate, God forgive you, and I hope he will, for making useof sich unsanctified words to your lawful clargy. "

 * My soul to God and the Virgin. 

"Well, but what do you intind to do?---or, what do you think of gettingfor them?" inquired Phaddy. 

"Indeed, it's very little matther what I get for them, or what I'll doeither--sorrow one of myself cares almost: for a man in his senses, thatought to know better, to make use of such low language about the blessedand holy crathurs, that hasn't a stain of sin about them, no more thanthe child unborn!"

"So you think. "

"So I think! aye, and it would be betther for you that you thoughtso, too; but ye don't know what's before ye yet, Phaddhy--and now takewarnin' in time, and mend your life. "

"Why what do you see wrong in my life? Am I a drunkard? am I lazy? didever I neglect my business? was I ever bad to you or to the childher?didn't I always give yez yer fill to ate, and kept yez as well clad asyer neighbors that was richer? Don't I go to my knees, too, every nightand morning?"

"That's true enough, but what signifies it all? When did ye crossa priest's foot to go to your duty? Not for the last five years, Phaddhy--not since poor Torly (God be good to him) died of the mazles, and that'll be five years, a fortnight before Christmas. "

"And what are you the betther of all yer confessions? Did they ever mendyer temper, avourneen? no, indeed, Katty, but you're ten times worsetempered coming back from the priest than before you go to him. "

"Oh! Phaddhy! Phaddhy! God look down upon you this day, or any manthat's in yer hardened state--I see there's no use in spaking to you, for you'll still be the ould cut. "

"Ay, will I; so you may as well give up talking about it Arrah, woman!"said. Phaddhy, raising his voice, "who does it ever make betther--showme a man now in all the neighborhood, that's a pin-point the holier ofit? Isn't there Jemmy Shields, that goes to _his duty_ wanst a month, malivogues his wife and family this minute, and then claps them to aRosary the next; but the ould boy's a thrifle to him of a fast day, afther coming from the priest. Betune ourselves, Katty, you're not muchbehind him. "

Katty made no reply to him, but turned up her eyes, and crossed herself, at the wickedness of her unmanageable husband. "Well, Briney, " said she, turning abruptly to the son, "don't take patthern by that man, if youexpect to do any good; let him be a warning to you to mind yer duty, andrespect yer clargy--and prepare yerself, now that I think of it, to goto Father Philemy or Father Con on Thursday: but don't be said or led bythat man, for I'm sure I dunna how he intends to face the Man abovewhen he laves this world--and to keep from his duty, and to spake of hisclargy as he does!"

There are few men without their weak sides. Phaddhy, although thepriests were never very much his favorites, was determined to givewhat he himself called a _let-out_ on this occasion, simply to show hisill-natured neighbors that, notwithstanding their unfriendly remarks, he knew "what it was to be dacent, " as well as his betters; and Kattyseconded him in his resolution, from her profound veneration for theclargy. Every preparation was accordingly entered into, and every planadopted that could possibly be twisted into a capability of contributingto the entertainment of Fathers Philemy and Con. 

One of those large, round, stercoraceous nosegays that, like many otherwholesome plants, make up by odor what is wanting in floral beauty, andwhich lay rather too contagious as Phaddhy expressed it, to the door ofhis house, was transplanted by about half a dozen laborers, and as manybarrows, in the course of a day or two, to a bed some yards distant fromthe spot of its first growth; because, without any reference whatever tothe nasal sense, it was considered that it might be rather aneye-sore to their Reverences, on approaching the door. Several concaveinequalities, which constant attrition had worn in the earthen floor ofthe kitchen, were filled up with blue clay, brought on a cart fromthe bank of a neighboring river, for the purpose. The dresser, chairs, tables, I pots, and pans, all underwent a rigor of discipline, as ifsome remarkable event was about to occur; nothing less, it must besupposed than a complete, domestic revolution, and a new state ofthings. Phaddhy himself cut two or three large furze bushes, and, sticking them on the end of a pitchfork, attempted to sweep down thechimney. For this purpose he mounted on the back of a chair, that hemight be able to reach the top with more ease; but, in order that hisfooting might be firm, he made one of the servant-men sit upon thechair, to keep it steady during the operation. Unfortunately, however, it so happened that this man was needed to assist in removing ameal-chest to another part of the house; this was under Katty'ssuperintendence, who, seeing the fellow sit rather more at his ease thanshe thought the hurry and importance of the occasion permitted, calledhim, with a little of her usual sharpness and energy, to assist inremoving the chest. For some reason or other, which it is not necessaryto mention here, the fellow bounced from his seat, in obedience to theshrill tones of Katty, and the next moment Phaddhy (who was in a stateof abstraction in the chimney, and totally unconscious of what was goingforward below) made a descent decidedly contrary to the nature ofthat which most aspirants would be inclined to relish. A severe stun, however, was the most serious injury he received on his own part, andseveral round oaths, with a good drubbing, fell to the servant; butunluckily he left the furze bush behind him in the highest and narrowestpart of the chimney; and were it not that an active fellow succeededin dragging it up from the outside of the roof, the chimney ranconsiderable risk, as Katy said, of being choked. 

But along with the lustration which every fixture within the house wasobliged to undergo, it was necessary that all the youngsters should getnew clothes; and for this purpose, Jemmy Lynch, the tailor, with his twojourneymen and three apprentices, were sent for in all haste, that hemight fit Phaddhy and each of his six sons, in suits, from a piece ofhome-made frieze, which Katty did not intend to break up till "towardsChristmas. "

A station is no common event, and accordingly the web was cut up, andthe tailor left a wedding-suit, half-made, belonging to Edy Dolan, athin old bachelor, who took it into his head to try his hand at becominga husband ere he'd die. As soon as Jemmy and his train arrived, a doorwas taken off the hinges, and laid on the floor, for himself to situpon, and a new drugget quilt was spread beside it, for his journeymenand apprentices. With nimble fingers they plied the needle and thread, and when night came, a turf was got, into which was stuck a piece ofrod, pointed at one end and split at the other; the "the white candle, "slipped into a shaving of the fringe that was placed in the cleft endof the stick, was then lit, whilst many a pleasant story, told by Jemmy, who had been once in Dublin for six weeks, delighted the circle oflookers-on that sat around them. 

At length the day previous to the important one arrived. Hitherto, allhands had contributed to make every thing in and about the house look"dacent"--scouring, washing, sweeping, pairing, and repairing, hadbeen all disposed of. The boys got their hair cut to the quick with thetailor's scissors; and such of the girls as were not full grown, notonly that which grew on the upper part of the head taken off, by a cutsomewhat resembling the clerical tonsure, so that they looked extremelywild and unsettled with their straight locks projecting over their ears;every thing, therefore, of the less important arrangements had been gonethrough--the weighty and momentous concern was as yet unsettled. 

This was the feast; and alas! never was the want of experience morestrongly felt than here. Katty was a bad cook, even to a proverb; andbore so indifferent a character in the country for cleanliness, thatvery few would undertake to eat her butter. Indeed, she was called KattySallagh (* Dirty Katy) on this account: however, this prejudice, whetherill or weil founded, was wearing fast away, since Phaddhy had succeededto the stocking of guineas, and the Lisnaskey farm. It might be, indeed, that her former poverty helped her neighbors to see this blemish moreclearly: but the world is so seldom in the habit of judging people'squalities or failings through this uncharitable medium, that thesupposition is rather doubtful. Be this as it may, the arrangements forthe breakfast and dinner must be made. There was plenty of bacon, andabundance of cabbages--eggs, ad infinitum--oaten and wheaten bread inpiles--turkeys, geese, pullets, as fat as aldermen--cream as rich asCroesus--and three gallons of poteen, one sparkle of which, as FatherPhilemy said in the course of the evening, would lay the hairs on St. Francis himself in his most self-negative mood, if he saw it. So far sogood: everything excellent and abundant in its way. Still the higher andmore refined items--the _deliciae epidarum_--must be added. White bread, and tea, and sugar, were yet to be got; and lump-sugar for the punch;and a tea-pot and cups and saucers to be borrowed; all which wasaccordingly done. 

Well, suppose everything disposed for tomorrow's feast;--suppose Phaddhyhimself to have butchered the fowl, because Katty, who was not able tobear the sight of blood, had not the heart to kill "the crathurs" andimagine to yourself one of the servant men taking his red-hot tongsout of the fire, and squeezing a large lump of hog's lard, placed in agrisset, or _Kam_, on the hearth, to grease all their brogues; then seein your mind's eye those two fine, fresh-looking girls, slyly taketheir old rusty fork out of the fire, and going to a bit of three-cornedlooking-glass, pasted into a board, or, perhaps, to a pail of water, there to curl up their rich-flowing locks, that had hitherto never knowna curl but such, as nature gave them. 

On one side of the hob sit two striplings, "thryin' wan another in theircatechiz, " that they may be able to answer, with some credit, to-morrow. On the other hob sits Briney, hard at his syntax, with the _FibulaeAEsiopii_, as he called it, placed open at a particular passage, on theseat under him, with a hope that, when Philemy will examine him, the book may open at his favorite fable of "_Gallus Gallinaceus_--adung-hill cock. " Phaddy himself is obliged to fast this day, there beingone day of his penance yet unperformed, since the last time he was athis duty; which was, as aforesaid, about five years: and Katty, now thateverything is cleaned up and ready, kneels down in a corner to go overher beads, rocking herself in a placid silence that is only broken byan occasional malediction against the servants, or the cat, when itattempts the abduction of one of the dead fowl. 

The next morning the family were up before the sun, who rubbed his eyes, and swore that he must have overslept himself, on seeing such a merrycolumn of smoke dancing over Phaddhy's chimney. A large wooden dish wasplaced upon the threshold of the kitchen door, filled with water, inwhich, with a trencher of oatmeal for soap, * they successively scrubbedtheir faces and hands to some purpose. In a short time afterwards, Phaddhy and the sons were cased, stiff and awkward, in their new suits, with the tops of their fingers just peeping over the sleeve cuffs. Thehorses in the stable were turned out to the fields, being obliged tomake room for their betters, that were soon expected under the reverendbodies of Father Philemy and his curate; whilst about half a bushel ofoats was left in the manger, to regale them on their arrival. LittleRichard Maguire was sent down to the five-acres, with the pigs, onpurpose to keep them from about the house, they not being supposed fitcompany at a set-dinner. A roaring turf fire, which blazed two yards upthe chimney, had been put down; on this was placed a large pot, filledwith water for the tea, because they had no kettle. 

 * Fact--Oatmeal is in general substituted for soap, by those who cannot afford to buy the latter. 

By this time the morning was tolerably advanced, and the neighbors werebeginning to arrive in twos and threes, to wipe out old scores. Kattyhad sent several of the gorsoons "to see if they could see any sight ofthe clargy, " but hitherto their Reverences were invisible. At length, after several fruitless embassies of this description, Father Con wasseen jogging along on his easygoing hack, engaged in the perusal of hisOffice, previous to his commencing the duties of the day. As soon as hisapproach was announced, a chair was immediately placed for him in a roomoff the kitchen--the parlor, such as it was, having been reserved forFather Phileniy himself, as the place of greater honor. This was anarrangement, however, which went against the grain of Phaddhy, who, had he got his will, would have established Father Con in the mostcomfortable apartment of the house: but that old vagabond, human nature, is the same under all circumstances--or, as Katty would have (in herown phraseology) expressed it, "still the ould cut;" for even there theinfluence of rank and elevation was sufficient to throw merit into theshade; and the parlor-seat was allotted to Father Philemy, merely forbeing Parish Priest, although it was well known that he could not "tareoff"* mass in half the time that Father Con could, nor throw asledge, or shoulder-stone within a perch of him, nor scarcely clear astreet-channel, whilst the latter could jump one-and-twenty feet at arunning leap. But these are rubs which men of merit must occasionallybear; and, when exposed to them, they must only rest satisfied in theconsciousness of their own deserts. 

 * The people look upon that priest as the best and most learned who can perform the ceremony of the mass in the shortest period of time. They call it as above "tareing off". The quickest description of mass, however, is the "hunting mass, " so termed from the speed at which the priest goes over it--that is, "at the rate of a hunt. "

From the moment that Father Con became visible, the conversationof those who were collected in Phaddhy's dropped gradually, as heapproached the house, into a silence which was only broken by anoccasional short observation, made by one or two of those who were inhabits of the greatest familiarity with the priest; but when they heardthe noise of his horse's feet near the door, the silence became generaland uninterrupted. 

There can scarcely be a greater contrast in anything than that presentedby the beginning of a station-day and its close. In the morning, thefaces of those who are about to confess present an expression in whichterror, awe, guilt, and veneration may be easily traced; but in theevening all is mirth and jollity. Before confession every man's memoryis employed in running over the catalogue of crimes, as they are to befound in the prayer-books, under the ten commandments, the seven deadlysins, the Commandments of the Church, the four sins that cry to heavenfor vengeance, and the seven sins against the Holy Ghost. 

When Father Con arrived, Phaddhy and Katty were instantly at the door towelcome him. 

"_Musha, cead millia failtha ghud_ (* A hundred thousand welcomes toyou. ) to our house, Father Con, avourneen!" says Katty, dropping him alow curtsey, and spreading her new, brown, quilted petticoat as far outon each side of her as it would go--"musha, an' it's you that's welcomefrom my heart out. "

"I thank you, " said honest Con, who, as he knew not her name, did notpretend to know it. 

"Well, Father Con, " said Phaddhy, this is, the first time you have evercome to us this, way; but, plase God, it won't be the last, I hope. "

"I hope not, Phaddhy, " said Father Con, who, notwithstanding hissimplicity of character, loved a good dinner in the very core of hisheart, "I hope not, indeed, Phaddhy. " He then threw his eye aboutthe premises, to see what point he might set his temper to during theremainder of the day; for it is right to inform our readers that apriest's temper, at a station, generally rises or falls according to theprospect of his cheer. 

Here, however, a little vista, or pantry, jutting out from the kitchen, and left ostentatiously open, presented him with a view which made hisvery nose curl with kindness. What it contained we do not pretend tosay, not having seen it ourselves; we judge, therefore, only by itseffects upon his physiognomy. 

"Why, Phaddhy, " he says, "this is a very fine house you've got overyou;" throwing his eye again towards a wooden buttress which supportedone of the rafters that was broken. 

"Why then, your Reverence, it would not be a bad one, " Phaddhy replied, "if it had a new roof and new side-walls; and I intend to get both nextsummer, if God spares me till then. "

"Then, upon my word, if it had new side-walls, a new roof, and newgavels, too, " replied Father Con, "it would look certainly a greatdeal the better for it;--and do you intend to to get them next summer, Paddy?"

"If God spares me, sir. "

"Are all these fine gorsoons yours, Phaddhy?"

"Why, so Katty says, your Reverence, " replied Phaddhy, with agood-natured laugh. 

"Haven't you got one of them for the church, Phaddhy?"

"Yes, your Reverence, there's one of them that I hope will live to havethe robes upon him Come over, Briney, and speak to Father Con. He's notvery far in his Latin yet, sir but his master tells me that he hasn'tthe likes of him in the school for brightness--Briney, will you comeover, I say; come over, sarrah, and spake to the gintleman, andhim wants to shake hands wid you--come up, man, what are you afeardof?--sure Father Con's not going to examine you now. "

"No, no, Briney, " said Father Con, "I'm not about to examine you atpresent. "

"He's a little dashed, yer Reverence, be-kase he thought you war goingto put him through some of his Latin, " said the father, bringing him uplike a culprit to Father Con, who shook hands with him, and, after a fewquestions as to the books he read, and his progress, dismissed him. 

"But, Father Con, wid submission, " said Katty, "where's Father Philemyfrom us?--sure, we expected him along wid you, and he wouldn't go todisappoint us?"

"Oh, you needn't fear that, Katty, " replied Father Con; "he'll be herepresently--before breakfast, I'll engage for him at any rate; but he hada touch of the headache this morning, and wasn't able to rise so earlyas I was. "

During this conversation a little crowd had collected about the door ofthe room in which he was to hear the confessions, each struggling andfighting to get the first turn; but here, as in the more importantconcerns of this world, the weakest went to the wall. He now went intothe room, and taking Katty herself first, the door was closed upon them, and he gave her absolution; and thus he continued to confess and absolvethem, one by one, until breakfast. 

Whenever a station occurs in Ireland, a crowd of mendicants and otherstrolling impostors seldom fail to attend it; on this occasion, atleast, they did not. The day, though frosty, was fine; and the door wassurrounded by a train of this description, including both sexes, somesitting on stones, some on stools, with their blankets rolled up underthem; and others, more ostensibly devout, on their knees, hard atprayer; which, lest their piety might escape notice, our readers may beassured, they did not offer up in silence. On one side you might observea sturdy fellow, with a pair of tattered urchins secured to his backby a sheet or blanket pinned across his breast with a long iron skewer, their heads just visible at his shoulders, munching a thick piece ofwheaten bread, and the father on his knees, with a a huge wooden crossin hand, repeating _padareens_, and occasionally throwing a jolly eyetowards the door, or through the; window, opposite which he knelt, into the kitchen, as often as any peculiar stir or commotion led him tosuppose that breakfast, the loadstar of his devotion, was about to beproduced. 

Scattered about the door were knots of these, men and women, occasionally chatting together; and when the subject of theirconversation happened to be exhausted, resuming their beads, until somenew topic would occur, and so on alternately. 

The interior of the kitchen where the neighbors were assembled, presented an appearance somewhat more decorous. Andy Lalor, themass-server, in whom the priest had the greatest confidence, stood ina corner examining, in their catechism, those who intended to confess;and, if they were able to stand the test, he gave them a bit of twistedbrown paper as a ticket, and they were received at the tribunal. 

The first question the priest uniformly puts to the penitent is, "Canyou repeat the Confiteor?" If the latter answers in the affirmative, hegoes on until he comes to the words, mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maximaculpa, when he stops, it being improper to repeat the remainder untilafter he has confessed; but, if he is ignorant of the "Confiteor, "the priest repeats it for him! and he commences the rehearsal of hisoffences, specifically as they occurred; and not only does he revealhis individual crimes, but his very thoughts and intentions. By thisregulation our readers may easily perceive, that the penitent iscompletely at the mercy of the priest--that all family feuds, quarrels, and secrets are laid open to his eye--that the ruling; passions ofmen's lives are held up before him, the weaknesses and propensities ofnature--all the unguarded avenues of the human heart and character arebrought within his positive knowledge, and that, too, as they existin the young and the old, the married and the single, the male and thefemale. 

It was curious to remark the ludicrous expression of temporary sanctitywhich was apparent on the countenances of many young men and maidens whowere remarkable in the neighborhood for attending dances and wakes, butwho, on the present occasion, were sobered down to a gravity which satvery awkwardly upon them; particularly in I the eyes of those who knewthe lightness and drollery of their characters. This, however, wasobservable only before confession; for, as soon as, "the priest'sblessed hand had been over them, " their gloom and anxiety passed away, and the thoughtless buoyancy of their natural disposition resumed itsinfluence over their minds. A good-humored nod, or a sly wink, froma young man to his female acquaintance, would now be indulged in; or, perhaps a small joke would escape, which seldom failed to produce asubdued laugh from such as had confessed, or an impatient rebuke fromthose who had not. 

"Tim!" one would exclaim, "arn't ye ashamed or afeared to get an thatway, and his Reverence undher the wan roof wid ye?"

"Tim, you had better dhrop your joking, " a second would observe, "andnot be putting us through other, (* confusing us) when we have ouroffenses to remimber; you have got your job over, and now you havenothing to trouble you. "

"Indeed, it's fine behavior, " a third would say, "and you afther comingfrom the priest's knee; and what more, didn't resave (* Communicate)yet; but wait till Father Con appears, and, I'll warrant, you'll be asgrave as another, for all you're so stout now. "

The conversation would then pass to the merits of Father Philemy andFather Con, as Confessors. 

"Well, " one would observe--"for my part, I'd rather go to FatherPhilemy, fifty times over, than wanst to Father Con, bekase he neveraxes questions; but whatever you like to tell him, he hears it, andforgives you at wanst. "

"And so sign's an it, " observed another; "he could confess more in a daythat Father Con could in a week. "

"But for all that, " observed Andy Lalor, "it's still best to go to theman that puts the questions, you persave, and that won't let the turningof a straw escape him. Whin myself goes to Father Philemy, somehow orother, I totally disremember more nor wan half of what I intinded totell him, but Father Con misses nothing, for he axes it. "

When the last observation was finished, Father Con, finding that theusual hour for breakfast had arrived, came into the kitchen, to preparefor the celebration of mass. For this purpose, a table was cleared, andjust in the nick of time arrived old Moll Brian, the vestment woman, oritinerant sacristan, whose usual occupation was to carry the priests'robes and other apparatus, from station to station. In a short time, Father Con was surpliced and robed; Andy Lalor, whose face was chargedwith commensurate importance during the ceremony, sarved Mass, andanswered the priest stoutly in Latin although he had not the advantageof understanding that sacerdotal language. Those who had confessed, nowcommunicated; after which, each of them took a draught, of water out ofa small jug, which was handed round from one to another. The ceremonythen closed, and those who had partaken of the sacrament, with theexception of such as were detained for breakfast, after filling theirbottles with holy water, went home with a light heart. A little beforethe mass had been finished, Father Philemy arrived; but, as Phaddy andKatty were then preparing to resave they could not at that moment givehim a formal reception. As soon, however, as communion was over, the_cead millia failtha_ was repeated with the usual warmth, by both, andby all their immediate friends. Breakfast was now laid in Katty'sbest style, and with an originality of arrangement that scorned allprecedent. Two tables were placed, one after another, in the kitchen;for the other rooms were not sufficiently large to accommodate thecompany. Father Philemy filled the seat of honor at the head of thetable, with his back to an immense fire. On his right hand sat FatherCon; on his left, Phaddhy himself, "to keep the-clargy company;" and, in due succession after them, their friends and neighbors, each takingprecedence according to the most scrupulous notions of respectability. Beside Father Con sat "Pettier Malone, " a "young collegian, " who hadbeen sent home from Maynooth to try his native air, for the recoveryof his health, which was declining. He arrived only a few minutes afterFather Philemy, and was a welcome reinforcement to Phaddhy, in thearduous task of sustaining the conversation with suitable credit. 

With respect to the breakfast, I can only say, that it wassuperabundant--that the tea was as black as bog water--that there werehen, turkey, and geese eggs--plates of toast soaked, crust and crumb, inbutter; and lest there might be a deficiency, one of the daughters saton a stool at the fire, with her open hand, by way of a fire screen, across her red, half-scorched brows, toasting another plateful, and, tocrown all, on each corner of the table was a bottle of whiskey. Atthe lower board sat the youngsters, under the surveillance of Katty'ssister, who presided in that quarter. When they were commencingbreakfast, "Father Philemy, " said Katty, "won't yer Rev'rence bless themate (* food) if ye plase?"

"If I don't do it myself, " said Father Philemy, who was just aftersweeping the top off a turkey egg, "I'll get them that will. Come, " saidhe to the collegian, "give us grace, Peter; you'll never learn younger. "

This, however, was an unexpected blow to Peter, who knew that anEnglish grace would be incompatible with his "college feeding, " yet wasunprovided with any in Latin--The eyes of the company were nowfixed upon him, and he blushed like scarlet on finding himself in apredicament so awkward and embarrassing. "_Aliquid, Petre, alliquid; 'deprofundis'--si habes nihil aliud_, " said Father Philemy, feeling forhis embarrassment, and giving him a hint. This was not lost, for Peterbegan, and gave them the _De profundis_--a Latin psalm, which RomanCatholics repeat for the relief of the souls in, purgatory. They forgot, however, that there was a person in company who considered himself ashaving an equal claim to the repetition of at least the one-half of it;and accordingly, when Peter got up and repeated the first verse, AndyLalor got also on his legs, and repeated the response. * This staggeredPeter a little, who hesitated, as uncertain how to act. 

 * This prayer is generally repeated by two persons, who recite each a verse alternately. 

"_Perge, Petre, perge_, " said Father Philemy, looking rather wistfullyat his egg--"_perge, stultus est et asinus quoque_. " Peter and Andyproceeded until it was finished, when they resumed their seats. 

The conversation during breakfast was as sprightly, as full of fun andhumor as such breakfasts usually are. The priest, Phaddhy, and the youngcollegian, had a topic of their own, whilst the rest were engaged in akind of by play, until the meal was finished. 

"Father Philemy, " said Phaddhy, in his capacity of host, "before webegin we'll all take a dhrop of what's in the bottle, if it's notdisplasing to yer Reverence; and, sure, I know, 'tis the same thatdoesn't come wrong at a station, any how. "

This, _more majorum_, was complied with; and the glass, as usual, wentround the table, beginning with their Reverences. Hitherto, FatherPhilemy had not had time to bestow any attention on the state of Kitty'slarder, as he was in the habit of doing, with a view to ascertainthe several items contained therein for dinner. But as soon as thebreakfast-things were removed, and the coast clear, he took a peep intothe pantry, and, after throwing his eye over its contents, sat downat the fire, making Phaddhy take a seat beside him, for the especialpurpose of sounding him as to the practicability of effecting a certaindesign, which was then snugly latent in his Reverence's fancy. The factwas, that on taking the survey of the premises aforesaid, he discoveredthat, although there was abundance of fowl, and fish, and bacon, andhung-beef--yet, by some unaccountable and disastrous omission, there wasneither fresh mutton nor fresh beef. The priest, it must be confessed, was a man of considerable fortitude, but this was a blow for which hewas scarcely prepared, particularly as a boiled leg of mutton was one ofhis fifteen favorite joints at dinner. He accordingly took two or threepinches of snuff in rapid succession, and a seat at the fire, as I havesaid, placing Phaddhy, unconscious of his design, immediately besidehim. 

Now, the reader knows that Phaddhy was a man possessing a considerableportion of dry, sarcastic humor, along with that natural, quickness ofpenetration and shrewdness for which most of the Irish peasantry are ina very peculiar degree remarkable; add to this that Father Philemy, inconsequence of his contemptuous bearing to him before he came in for hisbrother's property, stood not very high in his estimation. The priestknew this, and consequently felt that the point in question wouldrequire to be managed, on his part, with suitable address. 

"Phaddhy, " says his Reverence, "sit down here till we chat a little, before I commence the duties of the day. I'm happy to, see that you havesuch a fine thriving family: how many sons and daughters have you?"

"Six sons, yer Reverence, " replied. Phaddhy, "and five daughters:indeed, sir, they're as well to be seen as their neighbors, considheringall things. Poor crathurs, they get fair play* now, thank Grod, comparedto what they used to get--God rest their poor uncle's sowl for that!Only for him, your Reverence, there would be very few inquiring this orany other day about them. "

 * By this is meant good food and clothing. 

"Did he die as rich as they said, Phaddhy?" inquired his Reverence. 

"Hut, sir, " replied Phaddhy, determined to take what he afterwardscalled a rise out of the priest; "they knew little about it--as rich asthey said, sir! no, but three times as rich, itself: but, any how, hewas the man that could make the money. "

"I'm very happy to hear it, Phaddhy, on, your account, and that of yourchildren. God be good to him--_requiescat animus ejus in pace, per omniasecula seculorum_, Amen!--he liked a drop in his time, Phaddhy, as wellas ourselves, eh?"

"Amen, amen--the heavens be his bed!--he-did, poor man! but he had it atfirst cost, your Reverence, for he run it all himself in the mountains:he could afford to take it. "

"Yes, Phaddhy, the heavens be his bed, I pray; no Christmas or Easterever passed but he was sure to send me the little keg of stuff thatnever saw water; but, Phaddhy, there's one thing that concerns me abouthim, in regard of his love of drink--I'm afraid it's a throuble to himwhere he is at present; and I was sorry to find that, although he diedfull of money, he didn't think it worth his while to leave even theprice of a mass to be said for the benefit of his own soul. "

"Why, sure you know, Father Philemy, that he wasn't what they call adhrinking man: once a quarther, or so, he sartinly did take a jorum;and except at these times, he was very sober. But God look upon us, yerReverence--or upon myself, anyway; for if he's to suffer for his doingsthat way, I'm afeard we'll have a troublesome reck'ning of it. "

"Hem, a-hem!--Phaddhy, " replied the priest, "he has raised you and yourchildren from poverty, at all events, and you ought to consider that. Ifthere is anything in your power to contribute to the relief of hissoul, you havs a strong duty upon you to do it; and a number of masses, offered up devoutly, would--"

"Why, he did, sir, raise both myself and my childre from poverty, " saidPhaddhy, not willing to let that point go farther--"that I'll always ownto; and I hope in God that whatever little trouble might be upon him forthe dhrop of dhrink, will be wiped off by this kindness to us. "

"He hadn't even a Month's mind!"*

 * A Mouth's Mind is the repetition of one or more masses, at the expiration of a month after death, for the repose of a departed soul. There are generally more than the usual number of priests on such occasions: each of whom receives a sum of money, varying according to the wealth of the survivors--sometimes five shillings, and sometimes five guineas. 

"And it's not but I spoke to him about both, yer Eeverence. "

"And what did he say, Phaddy?"

"'Phaddy, ' said he, 'I have been giving Father M'Guirk, one way oranother, between whiskey, oats, and dues, a great deal of money everyyear; and now, afther I'm dead, ' says he, 'isn't it an ungratefulthing of him not to offer up one mass for my sowl, except I leave himpayment for it?'"

"Did he say that, Phaddhy?"

"I'm giving you his very words, yer Reverence. "

"Phaddhy, I deny it; it's a big lie--he could not make much use of suchwords, and he going to face death. I say you could not listen to them;the hair would stand on your head if he did; but God forgive him--that'sthe worst I wish him. Didn't the hair stand on your head, Phaddhy, tohear him?"

"Why, then, to tell yer Reverence God's truth, I can't say it did. "

"You can't say it did! and if I was in your coat, I would be ashamed tosay it did not. I was always troubled about the way the fellow died, but I hadn't the slightest notion: that he went off such a reprobate. Ifought his battle and yours hard enough yesterday; but I knew less abouthim than I do now. "

"And what, wid submission, did you fight our battles about, yerReverence?" inquired Phaddhy. 

"Yesterday evening, in Parrah More Slevin's, they had him a miser, andyourself they set down as very little better. "

"Then I don't think I desarved that from Parrah More, anyhow, FatherPhilemy; I think I can show myself as dacent as Parrah More or any ofhis faction. "

"It was not Parrah More himself, nor his family, that said anythingabout you, Phaddhy, " said the priest, "but others that were present. Youmust know that we were all to be starved here to-day. "

"Oh! ho!" exclaimed Phaddhy, who was hit most palpably upon the weakestside--the very sorest spot about him, "they think bekase this is thefirst station that ever was held in my house, that you won't be thratedas you ought; but they'll be disappointed; and I hope, for so far, thatyer Reverence and yer friends had no rason to complain. "

"Not in the least, Phaddhy, considering that it was a first station; andif the dinner goes as well off as the breakfast, they'll be biting theirnails: but I should not wish myself that they would have it in theirpower to sneer or throw any slur over you about it. --Go along, Dolan, "exclaimed his Reverence to a countryman who came in from the street, where those stood who were for confession, to see if he had gone to hisroom--"Go along, you vagrant, don't you see I'm not gone to the tribunalyet?--But it's no matter about that, Phaddhy, it's of other things youought to think: when were you at your duty?"

"This morning, sir, " replied the other--"but I'd have them tounderstand, that had the presumption to use my name in any such manner, that I know when and where to be dacent with any mother's son of ParrahMore's faction; and that I'll be afther whispering to them some of thesefine mornings, plase goodness. "

"Well, well, Phaddhy, don't put yourself in a passion about it, particularly so soon after having been at confession--it's not right--Itold them myself, that we'd have a leg of mutton and a bottle of wineat all events for it was what they had; but that's not worth talkingabout--when were you with the priest before Phaddhy?"

"If I wasn't able, it would be another thing, but as long as I'm able, I'll let them know that I've the spirit"--said Phaddhy, smarting underthe implication of niggardliness--"when was I at confession before, Father Philemy? Why, then, dear forgive me, not these five years;--andI'd surely be the first of the family that would show a mane spirit, ora want of hospitality. "

"A leg of mutton is a good dish, and a bottle of wine is fit for thefirst man in the land!" observed his Reverence; "five years!--why, isit possible you stayed away so long, Phaddhy! how could you expect toprosper with five years' burden of sin upon your conscience--what wouldit cost you--?"

"Indeed, myselfs no judge, your Reverence, as to that; but, cost what itwill, I'll get both. "

"I say, Phaddhy, what trouble would it cost you to come to your dutytwice a year at the very least; and, indeed, I would advise you tobecome a monthly communicant. Parrah More was speaking of it as tohimself, and you ought to go--"

"And I will go and bring Parrah More here to his dinner, this very day, if it was only to let him see with his own eyes--"

"You ought to go once a month, if it was only to set an example toyour children, and to show the neighbors how a man of substance andrespectability, and the head of a family, ought to carry himself. "

"Where is the best wine got, your Reverence?"

"Alick M'Loughlin, my nephew, I believe, keeps the best wine and spiritsin Ballyslantha. --You ought also, Phaddy, to get a scapular, and becomea scapularian; I wish your brother had thought of that, and he wouldn'thave died in so hardened a state, nor neglected to make a provision forthe benefit of his soul, as he did. "

"Lave the rest to me, yer Reverence, I'll get it; Mr. M'Loughlin willgive me the right sort, if he has it betune him and death. "

"M'Laughlin! what are you talking about?"

"Why, what is your Reverence talking about?"

"The scapular, " said the priest. 

"But I mane the wine and the mutton, " says Phaddhy. 

"And is that the way you treat me, you reprobate you?" replied hisReverence in a passion: "is that the kind of attention you're paying me, and I, advising you, all this time, for the good of your soul? Phaddhy, I tell you, you're enough to vex me to the core--five years!--only onceat confession in five years! What do I care about your mutton and yourwine!--you may get dozens of them if you wish; or, may be, it would bemore like a Christian to never mind getting them, and let the neighborslaugh away. It would teach you humility, you hardened creature, and Godknows you want it; for my part, I'm speaking to you about other things;but that's the way with the most of you--mention any spiritual subjectthat concerns your soul, and you turn a deaf ear to it--here, Dolan, come in to your duty. In the meantime, you may as well tell Katty notto boil the mutton too much; it's on your knees you ought to be at yourrosary, or the seven penitential psalms, any way. "

"Thrue for you, sir, " says Phaddhy; "but as to going wanst a month, I'm afeard, your Rev'rence, if it would shorten my timper as it doesKatty's, that we'd be bad company for one another; she comes home fromconfession, newly set, like a razor, every bit as sharp; and I'm surethat I'm within the truth when I say there's no bearing her. "

"That's because you've no relish for anything spiritual yourself, younager you, " replied his Reverence, "or you wouldn't see her temper inthat light--but, now that I think of it, where did you get that stuff wehad at breakfast?"

"Ay, that's the sacret; but I knew your Rev'rence would like it; didParrah More aiquil it? No, nor one of his faction couldn't lay hisfinger on such a dhrop. "

"I wish you could get me a few gallons of it, " said the priest; "but letus drop that; I say, Phaddhy, you're too worldly and too careless aboutyour duty. "

"Well, Father Philemy, there's a good time coming; I'll mend yet. "

"You want it, Phaddhy. "

"Would three gallons do, sir?"

"I would rather you would make it five, Phaddhy; but go to your rosary. "

"It's the penitential psalms, first, sir, " said Phaddhy, "and the rosaryat night. I'll try, anyhow; and if I can make off five for you, I will. "

"Thank you, Phaddhy; but I would recommend you to say the rosary beforenight. "

"I believe yer Reverence is right, " replied Phaddhy, looking somewhatslyly in the priest's face; "I think it's best to make sure of it now, in regard that in the evening, your Reverence--do you persave?"

"Yes, " said his Reverence, "you're in a better frame of mind at present, Phaddhy, being fresh from confession. "

So saying, his Reverence--for whom Phaddhy, with all his shrewdness ingeneral, was not a match--went into his room, that he might send homeabout four dozen of honest, good-humored, thoughtless, jovial, swearing, drinking, fighting Hibernians, free from every possible stain of sin andwickedness!

"Are you all ready now?" said the priest to a crowd of country peoplewho were standing about the kitchen door, pressing to get the "firstturn" at the tribunal, which on this occasion consisted of a good oakenchair, with his Reverence upon it. 

"Why do you crush forward in that manner, you ill-bred spalpeens? Can'tyou stand back, and behave yourselves like common Christians?--back withyou! or, if you make me get my whip, I'll soon clear you from about thedacent man's door. Hagarty, why do you crush them two girls there, you great Turk, you? Look at the vagabonds! Where's my whip, " said he, running in, and coming out in a fury, when he commenced cutting abouthim, until they dispersed in all directions. He then returned into thehouse; and, after calling in about two dozen, began to catechize themas follows, still holding the whip in his hand, whilst many of thoseindividuals, who at a party quarrel or faction fight, in fair or market, were incapable of the slightest terror, now stood trembling before him, absolutely pale and breathless with fear. 

"Come, Kelly, " said he to one of them, "are you fully prepared for thetwo blessed sacraments of Penance and the Eucharist, that you are aboutto receive? Can you read, sir?"

"Can I read, is id?--my brother Barney can, yor Rev'rence, " repliedKelly, sensible, amid all the disadvantages around him, of thedegradation of his ignorance. 

"What's that to me, sir?" said the priest, "what your brother Barney cando--can you not read yourself?"

"I can not, your Reverence, " said Kelly, in a tone of regret. 

"I hope you have your Christian Doctrine, at all events, " said thepriest. "Go on with the Confiteor. "

Kelly went on--"Confeetur Dimnipotenmti batchy Mary semplar virginy, batchy Mickletoe Archy Angelo, batchy Johnny Bartisty, sanctrispostlis--Petrum hit Paulum omnium sanctris, et tabby pasture, quay apixavit minus coglety ashy hony verbum et offer him smaxy quilia smaxyquilta--sniaxy maxin in quilia. "*

 * Let not our readers suppose that the above version in the mouth of a totally illiterate peasant is overcharged; for we have the advantage of remembering how we ourselves used to hear it pronounced in our early days. We will back the version in the text against Edward Irving's new language--for any money. -- Original note. 

"Very well, Kelly, right enough, all except the pronouncing, which wouldn't pass muster in Maynooth, however. How many kinds ofcommandments are there?"

"Two, sir. "

"What are they?"

"God's and the Church's. "

"Repeat God's share of them. "

He then repeated the first commandment according to his catechism. 

"Very good, Kelly, very good. Well now, repeat the commandments of theChurch. "

"First--Sundays and holidays, Mass thou shalt sartinly hear;

"Second--All holidays sanctificate throughout all the whole year. 

"Third--Lent, Ember days, and Virgins, thou shalt be sartain to fast;

"Fourth--Fridays and Saturdays flesh thou shalt not, good, bad orindifferent, taste. 

"Fifth--In Lent and Advent, nuptial fastes gallantly forbear. 

"Sixth--Confess your sins, at laste once dacently and soberly everyyear. 

"Seventh--Resave your God at confission about great Easter-day;

"Eighth--And to his Church and his own frolicsome clargy neglect nottides (tithes) to pay. "

"Well, " said his Eeverence, "now, to great point is, do you understandthem?"

"Wid the help of God, I hope so, your Rev'rence; and I have also thethree thriptological vartues. "

"Theological, sirrah!"

"Theojollyological vartues; the four sins that cry to heaven forvingeance; the five carnal vartues--prudence, justice, timptation, andsolitude; (* Temperance and fortitude) the seven deadly sins; the eightgrey attitudes--"

"Grey attitudes! Oh, the Boeotian!" exclaimed his Eeverence, "listen tothe way in which he's playing havoc among them. Stop, sir, " for Kellywas going on at full speed--"Stop, sir. I tell you it's not grayattitudes, but bay attitudes--doesn't every one know the eightbeatitudes?"

"The eight bay attitudes; the nine ways of being guilty of another'ssins; the ten commandments; the twelve fruits of a Christian; thefourteen stations of the cross; the fifteen mystheries of the passion--"

"Kelly, " said his Eeverence, interrupting him, and heralding, the joke, for so it was intended, with a hearty chuckle, "you're getting fast outof your teens, ma bouchal?" and this was of course, honored with amerry peal; extorted as much by an effort of softening the rigor ofexamination, as by the traditionary duty which entails upon the Irishlaity the necessity of laughing at a priest's jokes, without anyreference at all to their quality. Nor was his Reverence's own voicethe first to subside into that gravity which became the solemnity of theoccasion; or even whilst he continued the interrogatories, his eye waslaughing at the conceit with which it was evident the inner man was notcompetent to grapple. "Well, Kelly, I can't say but you've answeredvery well, as far as the repealing of them goes; but do you perfectlyunderstand all the commandments of the church?"

"I do, sir, " replied Kelly, whose confidence kept pace with hisReverence's good-humor. 

"Well, what is meant by the fifth?"

"The fifth, sir?" said the other, rather confounded--"I must begin agin, sir, and go on till I come to it. "

"Well, " said the priest, "never mind that; but tell us what the eighthmeans?"

Kelly stared at him a second time, but was not able to advance"First--Sundays and holidays, mass thou shalt hear;" but before hehad proceeded to the second, a person who stood at his elbow began towhisper to him the proper reply, and in the act of so doing received alash of the whip across the ear for his pains. 

"You blackguard, you!" exclaimed Father Philemy, "take that--how dareyou attempt to prompt any person that I'm examining?"

Those who stood around Kelly now fell back to a safe distance, and allwas silence, terror, and trepidation once more. 

"Come, Kelly, go on--the eighth?"

Kelly was still silent. 

"Why, you ninny you, didn't you repeat it just now. 'Eighth--And to hischurch neglect not tithes to pay. ' Now that I have put the words in yourmouth, what does it mean?"

Kelly having thus got the cue, replied, in the words of the Catechism, "To pay _tides_ to the lawful _pasterns_ of the church, sir. "

"Pasterns!--oh, you ass you! _Pasterns!_ you poor; base, contemptible, crawling reptile, as if we trampled you under our hooves--oh, you scruffof the earth! Stop, I say--it's pastors. "

"Pastures of the church. "

"And, tell me, do you fulfil that commandment?"

"I do, sir. "

"It's a lie, sir, " replied the priest, brandishing the whip over hishead, whilst Kelly instinctively threw up his guard to protect himselffrom the blow. "It's a lie, sir, " repeated his Eeverence; "you don'tfulfil it. What is the church?"

"The church is the congregation of the faithful that purfiss the truefaith, and are obadient to the Pope. "

"And who do you pay tithes to?"

"To the parson, sir. "

"And, you poor varmint you, is he obadient to the Pope?"

Kelly only smiled at the want of comprehension which prevented him fromseeing the thing according to the view which his Reverence took of it. 

"Well, now, " continued Father Philemy, "who are the lawful pastors ofGod's church?"

"You are, sir: and all our own priests. "

"And who ought you to pay your tithes to?"

"To you, sir, in coorse; sure I always knew that, your Rev'rence. "

"And what's the reason, then, you don't pay them to me, instead of theparson?"

This was a puzzler to Kelly, who only knew his own side of the question. "You have me there, sir, " he replied, with a grin. 

"Because, " said his Reverence, "the Protestants, for the present, have, the law of the land on their side, and power over you to compel thepayment of tithes to themselves; but we have right, justice, and the lawof God on ours; and, if every thing was in its proper place, it is notto the parsons, but to us, that you would pay them. "

"Well, well, sir, " replied Kelly, who now experienced a community offeeling upon the subject with his Reverence, that instantly threw himinto a familiarity of manner which he thought the point between themjustified--"who knows, sir?" said he with a knowing smile, "there's agood time coming, yer Rev'rence. "

"Ay, " said Father Philemy, "wait till we get once into the Big* House, and if we don't turn the scales--if the Established Church doesn'tgo down, why, it won't be our fault. Now, Kelly, all's right but themoney--have you brought your dues?"

 * Parliament. This was written before the passing of the Emancipation Bill. 

"Here it is, sir, " said Kelly, handing him his dues for the last year. 

It is to be observed here, that, according as the penitents went to beexamined, or to kneel down to confess, a certain sum was exacted fromeach, which varied according to the arrears that might have been due tothe priest. Indeed, it is not unusual for the host and hostess, on theseoccasions, to be refused a participation in the sacrament, until theypay this money, notwithstanding the considerable expense they are put toin entertaining not only the clergy, but a certain number of their ownfriends and relations. 

"Well, stand aside, I'll hear you first; and now, come up here, youyoung gentleman, that laughed so heartily a while ago at my joke--ha, ha, ha!--come up here, child. "

A lad now approached him, whose face, on a first view, had somethingsimple and thoughtless in it, but in which, on a closer inspection, might be traced a lurking, sarcastic humor, of which his Reverence neverdreamt. 

"You're for confession, of course?" said the priest. 

"_Of coorse_, " said the lad, echoing him, and laying a stress uponthe word, which did not much elevate the meaning of the compliance ingeneral with the rite in question. 

"Oh!" exclaimed the priest, recognizing him when he approached--"you areDan Fagan's son, and designed for the church yourself; you are a goodLatinist, for I remember examining you in Erasmus about two yearsago--_Quomodo sehabet corpus tuum, charum lignum sacredotis_"

"_Valde, Domine_, " replied the lad, "_Quomodo se habet anima tua, charumexemplar sacerdotage, et fulcrum robustissium Ecclesiae sacrosancte_?"

"Very good, Harry, " replied his Reverence, laughing--"stand aside; I'llhear you after Kelly. "

He then called up a man with a long melancholy face, which he noticedbefore to have been proof against his joke, and after making twoor three additional and fruitless experiments upon his gravity, hecommenced a cross fire of peevish interrogatories, which would haveexcluded him from the "tribunal" on that occasion, were it not that theman was remarkably well prepared, and answered the priest's questionsvery pertinently. 

This over, he repaired to his room, where the work of absolutioncommenced; and, as there was a considerable number to be renderedsinless before the hour of dinner, he contrived to unsin them with analacrity that was really surprising. 

Immediately after the conversation already detailed between hisReverence and Phaddhy, the latter sought Katty, that he mightcommunicate to her the unlucky oversight which they had committed, inneglecting to provide fresh meat and wine. "We'll be disgraced forever, "said Phaddhy, "without either a bit of mutton or a bottle of wine forthe gintlemen, and that big thief Parrah More Slevin had both. "

"And I hope, " replied Katty, "that you're not so mane as to let any ofthat faction outdo you in dacency, the nagerly set? It was enough forthem to bate us in the law-shoot about the horse, and not to have thelaugh agin at us about this. "

"Well, that same law-shoot is not over with them yet, " said Phaddhy;"wait till the spring fair comes, and if I don't have a faction gatheredthat'll sweep them out of the town, why my name's not Phaddhy! But whereis Matt till we sind him off?"

"Arrah, Phaddhy, " said Katty, "wasn't it friendly of Father Philemy togive us the hard word about the wine and mutton?"

"Very friendly, " retorted Phaddhy, who, after all, appeared to havesuspected the priest--"very friendly, indeed, when it's to put a goodjoint before himself, and a bottle of wine in his jacket. No, no, Katty!it's not altogether for the sake of Father Philemy, but I wouldn't havethe neighbors say that I was near and undacent; and above all tilings, I wouldn't be worse nor the Slevins--for the same set would keep it upagin us long enough. "

Our readers will admire the tact with which Father Philemy worked uponthe rival feeling between the factions; but, independently of this, there is a generous hospitality in an Irish peasant which would urge himto any stratagem, were it even the disposal of his only cow, sooner thanincur the imputation of a narrow, or, as he himself terms it, "undacent"or "nagerly" spirit. 

In the course of a short time, Phaddhy dispatched two messengers, onefor the wine, and another for the mutton; and, that they might nothave cause for any unnecessary delay, he gave them the two reverendgentlemen's horses, ordering them to spare neither whip nor spur untilthey returned. This was an agreeable command to the messengers, who, assoon as they found themselves mounted, made a bet of a "trate, " to bepaid on arriving in the town to which they were sent, to him who shouldfirst reach a little stream that crossed the road at the entrance of it, called the "Pound burn. " But I must not forget to state, that they notonly were mounted on the priest's horses, but took their great-coats, asthe day had changed, and threatened to rain. Accordingly, on getting outupon the main road, they set off, whip and spur, at full speed, jostlingone another, and cutting each other's horses as if they had beenintoxicated; and the fact is, that, owing to the liberal distribution ofthe bottle that morning, they were not far from it. 

[Illustration: PAGE 756-- They set off, whip and spur, at full speed]

"Bliss us!" exclaimed the country people, as they passed, "what on airthcan be the matther with Father Philemy and Father Con, that they'reabusing wan another at sich a rate!"

"Oh!" exclaimed another, "it's apt to be a sick call, and they'rethrying, maybe, to be there before the body grows cowld. "

"Ay, it may be, " a third conjectured, "it's to old Magennis, that's onthe point of death, and going to lave all his money behind him. "

But their astonishment was not a whit lessened, when, in about an hourafterwards, they perceived them both return; the person who representedFather Con having an overgrown leg of mutton slung behind his back likean Irish harp, reckless of its friction against his Reverence's coat, which it had completely saturated with grease; and the duplicate ofFather Philemy with a sack over his shoulder, in the bottom of which washalf a dozen of Mr. M'Laughlin's best port. 

Phaddhy, in the meantime, being determined to mortify his rival ParrahMore by a superior display of hospitality, waited upon that parsonage, and exacted a promise from him to come down and partake of the dinner--apromise which the other was not slack in fulfilling. Phaddhy's heart wasnow on the point of taking its rest, when it occurred to him that thereyet remained one circumstance in which he might utterly eclipse hisrival, and that was to ask Captain Wilson, his landlord, to meet theirReverences at dinner. He accordingly went over to him, for he only liveda few fields distant, having first communicated the thing privately toKatty, and requested that, as their Reverences that day held a stationin his house, and would dine there, he would have the kindness to dinealong with them. To this the Captain, who was intimate with both theclergymen, gave a ready compliance, and Phaddhy returned home in highspirits. 

In the meantime, the two priests were busy in the work of absolution;the hour of three had arrived, and they had many to shrive; but, inthe course of a short time, a reverend auxiliary made his appearance, accompanied by one of Father Philemy's nephews, who was then about toenter Maynooth. This clerical gentleman had been appointed to a parish;but, owing to some circumstances which were known only in the distantpart of the diocese where he had resided, he was deprived of it, andhad, at the period I am writing of, no appointment in the church, though he was in full orders. If I mistake not, he incurred his bishop'sdispleasure by being too warm an advocate for Domestic Nomination, * apiece of discipline, the re-establishment of which was then attempted bythe junior clergymen of the diocese wherein the scene of this stationis laid. Be this as it may, he came in time to assist the gentlemen inabsolving those penitents (as we must call them so) who still remainedunconfessed. 

 * Domestic Nomination was the right claimed by a portion of the Irish clergy to appoint their own bishops, independently of the Pope. 

During all this time Katty was in the plenitude of her authority, andher sense of importance manifested itself in a manner that was by nomeans softened by having been that morning at her duty. Her toneswere not so shrill, nor so loud as they would have been, had not theirReverences been within hearing; but what was wanting in loudness, wasdisplayed in a firm and decided energy, that vented, itself frequentlyin the course of the day upon the backs and heads of her sons, daughters, and servants, as they crossed her path in the impatienceand bustle of her employment. It was truly ludicrous to see her, onencountering one of them in these fretful moments, give him a drivehead-foremost against the wall, exclaiming, as she shook her fist athim, "Ho, you may bless your stars, that they're under the roof, or itwouldn't go so asy wid you; for if goodness hasn't said it, you'llmake me lose my sowl this blessed and holy day: but this is still thecase--the very time I go to my duty, the devil (between us and harm)is sure to throw fifty temptations acrass me, and to help him, you mustcome in my way--but wait till tomorrow, and if I, don't pay you forthis, I'm not here. "

That a station is an expensive ordinance to the peasant who is honoredby having one held in his house, no one who knows the characteristichospitality of the Irish people can doubt. I have reason, however, toknow that, within the last few years, stations in every sense have beenvery much improved, where they have not been abolished altogether. The priests now are not permitted to dine in the houses of theirparishioners, by which a heavy tax has been removed from the people. 

About four o'clock the penitents were at length all despatched; andthose who were to be detained for dinner, many of whom had not eatenanything until then, in consequence of the necessity of receiving theEucharist fasting, were taken aside to taste some of Phaddhy's poteen. At length the hour of dinner arrived, and along with it the redoubtableParra More Slevin, Captain Wilson, and another nephew of FatherPhilemy's, who had come to know what detained his brother who hadconducted the auxiliary priest to Phaddhy's. It is surprising on theseoccasions, to think how many uncles, nephews, and cousins, to theforty-Second degree, find it needful to follow their Reverences onmessages of various kinds; and it is equally surprising to observe withwhat exactness they drop in during the hour of dinner. Of course, any blood-relation or friend of the priests must be received withcordiality; and consequently they do not return without solid proofsof the good-natured hospitality of poor Paddy, who feels no greaterpleasure than in showing his "dacency" to any one belonging to hisReverence. 

I dare say it would be difficult to find a more motley and diversifiedcompany than sat down to the ungarnished fare which Katty laid beforethem. There were first Fathers Philemy, Con, and the Auxiliary from thefar part of the diocese; next followed Captain Wilson, Peter Malone, andFather Philemy's two nephews; after these came Phaddhy himself, ParrahMore Slevin, with about two dozen more of the most remarkable anduncouth personages that could sit down to table. There were besidesabout a dozen of females, most of whom by this time, owing to Katty'sprivate kindness, were in a placid state of feeling. Father Philemy _exofficio_, filled the chair--he was a small man with cherub cheeks as redas roses, black twinkling eyes, and double chin; was of the fat-headedgenus, and, if phrenologists be correct, must have given indicationsof early piety, for he was bald before his time, and had the organ ofveneration standing visible on his crown; his hair from having once beenblack, had become an iron gray, and hung down behind his ears, restingon the collar of his coat according to the old school, to which, I mustremark, he belonged, having been educated on the Continent. His coathad large double breasts, the lappels of which hung down loosely on eachside, being the prototype of his waistcoat, whose double breasts felldownwards in the same manner--his black small-clothes had silver bucklesat the knees, and the gaiters, which did not reach up so far, discovereda pair of white lamb's-wool stockings, somewhat retreating from theiroriginal color. 

Father Con was a tall, muscular, able-bodied young man, with animmensely broad pair of shoulders, of which he was vain; his black hairwas cropped close, except a thin portion of it which was trimmed quiteevenly across his eyebrows; he was rather bow-limbed, and when walkinglooked upwards, holding out his elbows from his body, and letting thelower parts of his arms fall down, so that he went as if he carried akeg under each; his coat, though not well made, was of the best glossybroadcloth--and his long clerical boots went up about his knees likea dragoon's; there was an awkward stiffness about him, in very goodkeeping with a dark melancholy cast of countenance, in which, however, aman might discover an air of simplicity not to be found in the visage ofhis superior Father Philemy. 

The latter gentleman filled the chair, as I said, and carved the goose;on his right sat Captain Wilson; on his left, the auxiliary--next tothem Father Con, the nephews, Peter Malone, _et cetera_. To enumeratethe items of the dinner is unnecessary, as our readers have a prettyaccurate notion of them from what we have already said. We can onlyobserve, that when Phaddhy saw it laid, and all the wheels of the systemfairly set agoing, he looked at Parrah More with an air of triumphwhich he could not conceal. It is also unnecessary for us to give theconversation in full; nor, indeed, would we attempt giving any portionof it, except for the purpose of showing the spirit in which a religiousceremony such as it is, is too frequently closed. 

The talk in the beginning was altogether confined to the clergymen andMr. Wilson, including a few diffident contributions from "Peter Malone"and the "two nephews. "

"Mr. M'Guirk, " observed Captain Wilson, after the conversation had takenseveral turns, "I'm sure that in the course of your professional duties, sir, you must have had occasion to make many observations upon humannature, from the circumstance of seeing it in every condition and stateof feeling possible; from the baptism of the infant, until the aged manreceives the last rites of your church, and the soothing consolation ofreligion from your hand. "

"Not a doubt of it, Phaddhy, " said Father Philemy to Phaddhy, whomhe had been addressing at the time, "not a doubt of it; and I'lldo everything in my power to get him _in_* too, and I am told he isbright. "

 * That is--into Maynooth college--the great object of ambition to the son of an Irish peasant or rather to his parent. 

"Uncle, " said one of the nephews, "this gentleman is speaking to you. "

"And why not?" continued his Eeverence, who was so closely engaged withPhaddhy, that he did not even hear the nephew's appeal--"a bishop--andwhy not? Has he not as good a chance of being a bishop as any of them?though, God knows, it is not always merit that gets a bishopric in anychurch, or I myself might--But let that pass. " said he, fixing his eyeson the bottle. "Father Philemy, " said Father Con, "Captain Wilson wasaddressing himself to you in a most especial manner. "

"Oh! Captain, I beg ten thousand pardons, I was engaged talking withPhaddhy here about his son, who is a young shaving of our cloth, sir, heis intended for the Mission*--Phaddhy, I will either examine him myself, or make Father Con examine him by-and-by. --Well, Captain?" The Captainnow repeated what he had said. 

 * The Church of Rome existing in any heretical country-- that is, where she herself is not the State church--is considered a missionary establishment; and taking orders in her is termed "Going upon the Mission. " Even Ireland is looked upon as _in partibus infidelium_, because Protestantism is established by law--hence the phrase above. 

"Very true, Captain, and we do see it in as many shapes as ever--Con, what do you call him?--put on him. "

"Proteus, " subjoined Con, who was famous at the classics. 

Father Philemy nodded for the assistance, and continued--"but as forhuman nature, Captain, give it to me at a good rousing christening;or what is better again, at a jovial wedding between two of my ownparishioners--say this pretty fair-haired daughter of Phaddhy ShemusPhaddhy's here, and long Ned Slevin, Parrah More's son there--ehPhaddhy, will it be a match?--what do you say, Parrah More? Upon myveracity I must bring that about. "

"Why, then, yer Reverence, " replied Phaddhy, who was now a littlesoftened, and forgot his enmity against Parrah More for the present, "unlikelier things might happen. "

"It won't be my fault, " said Parrah More, "if my son Ned has noobjection. "

"He object!" replied Father Philemy, "if' I take it in hands, let me seewho'll dare to object; doesn't the Scripture say it? and sure we can'tgo against the Scripture. "

"By the by, " said Captain Wilson, who was a dry humorist, "I am happy tobe able to infer from what you say, Father Philemy, that you are not, asthe clergymen of your church are supposed to be, inimical to the Bible. "

"Me an enemy to the Bible! no such thing, sir; but, Captain, beggingyour pardon we will have nothing more about the bible; you see we aremet here, as friends and good fellows, to enjoy ourselves after theseverity of our spiritual duties, and we must relax a little; we can'talways carry long faces like Methodist parsons--come, Pairah More, letthe Bible take a nap, and give us a song. "

His Reverence was now seconded in his motion by the most of all present, and Parrah More accordingly gave them a song. After a few songs more, the conversation went on as before. 

"Now, Parrah More, " said Phaddhy, "you must try my wine; I hope it's asgood as what you gave his Reverence yesterday. " The words, however, hadscarcely passed his lips, when Father Philemy burst out into a fitof laughter, clapping and rubbing his hands in a manner the mostirresistible. "Oh, Phaddhy, Phaddhy!" shouted his Reverence, laughingheartily, "I done you for once--I done you, my man, cute as you thoughtyourself: why, you nager you, did you think to put us off with punch, and you have a stocking of hard guineas hid in a hole in the wall?"

"What does yer Rev'rence mane, " said Phaddhy; "for myself can make nounderstanding out of it, at all at all?"

To this his Reverence only replied by another laugh. 

"I gave his Reverence no wine, " said Parrah More, in reply to Phaddhy'squestion. 

"What!" said Phaddhy, "none yesterday, at the station held with you?"

"Not a bit of me ever thought of it. "

"Nor no mutton?"

"Why, then, devil a morsel of mutton, Phaddhy; but we had a rib ofbeef. "

Phaddhy now looked over to his Reverence rather sheepishly, with thesmile of a man on his face who felt himself foiled. "Well, yer Reverencehas done me, sure enough, " he replied, rubbing his head--"I give it upto you, Father Philemy; but any how, I'm glad I got it, and you're allwelcome from the core of my heart. I'm only sorry I haven't as much morenow to thrate you all like gintlemen; but there's some yet, and as muchpunch as will make all our heads come round. "

Our readers must assist us with their own imaginations, and suppose theconversation to have passed very pleasantly, and the night, as wellas the guests, to be somewhat far gone. The principal part of theconversation was borne by the three clergymen, Captain Wilson, andPhaddy; that of the two nephews and Peter Malone ran in an under currentof its own; and in the preceding part of the night, those who occupiedthe bottom of the table, spoke to each other rather in whispers, beingtoo much restrained by that rustic bashfulness which ties up the tonguesof those who feel that their consequence is overlooked among theirsuperiors. According as the punch circulated, however, their diffidencebegan to wear off; and occasionally an odd laugh or so might be heardto break the monotony of their silence. The youngsters, too, though atfirst almost in a state of terror, soon commenced plucking each other;and a titter, or a suppressed burst of laughter, would break forth fromone of the more waggish, who was put to a severe task in afterwardscomposing his countenance into sufficient gravity to escape detection, and a competent portion of chastisement the next day, for not being ableto "behave himself with betther manners. "

During these juvenile breaches of decorum, Katty would raise her armin a threatening attitude, shake her head at them, and look up at theclergy, intimating more by her earnestness of gesticulation than metthe ear. Several songs again went round, of which, truth to tell, Father Philomy's were by far the best; for he possessed a rich, comicexpression of eye, which, added to suitable ludicrousness of gesture, and a good voice, rendered him highly amusing to the company. FatherCon declined singing, as being decidedly serious, though he was oftensolicited. 

"He!" said Father Philemy, "he has no more voice than a woolpack;but Con's a cunning fellow. What do you think, Captain Wilson, buthe pretends to be too pious to sing, and gets credit for piety, --notbecause he is devout, but because he has a bad voice; now, Con, youcan't deny it, for there's not a man in the three kingdoms knows itbetter than myself; you sit there with a face upon you that might gobefore the Lamentations of Jeremiah the Prophet, when you ought to be asjovial as another. "

"Well, Father Philemy, " said Phaddhy, "as he won't sing, may be, widsubmission he'd examine Briney in his Latin, till his mother and I hearhow's he doing at it. "

"Ay, he's fond of dabbling at Latin, so he may try him--I'm sure I haveno objection--: so, Captain, as I was telling you--"

"Silence there below!" said Phaddhy to those at the lower end of thetable, who were now talkative enough; "will yez whisht there till FatherCon hears Briney a lesson in his Latin. Where are you, Briney? comehere, ma bouchal. "

But Briney had absconded when he saw that the tug of war was about tocommence. In a few minutes, however, the father returned, pushingthe boy before him, who in his reluctance to encounter the ordeal ofexamination, clung to every chair, table, and person in his way, hopingthat his restiveness might induce them to postpone the examination tillanother occasion. The father, however, was inexorable, and by main forcedragged him from all his holds, and, placed him before Father Con. 

"What's come over you, at all at all, you unsignified shingawn you, toaffront the gintleman in this way, and he kind enough to go for to giveyou an examination?--come now, you had betther not vex me, I tell you, but hould up your head, and spake out loud, that we can all hearyou: now, Father Con, achora, you'll not be too hard upon him in thebeginning, till he gets into it, for he's aisy dashed. "

"Here, Briney, " said Father Philemy, handing him his tumbler, "takea pull of this and if you have any courage at all in you it will raiseit;--take a good pull. " Briney hesitated. 

"Why, but you take the glass out of his Reverence's hand, sarrah, "said the father--"what! is it without dhrinking his Reverence's healthfirst?"

Briney gave a most melancholy nod at his Reverence, as he put thetumbler to his mouth, which he nearly emptied, notwithstanding hisshyness. 

"For my part, " said his Reverence, looking at the almost empty tumbler, "I am pretty sure that that same chap will be able to take careof himself through life. And so, Captain, --" said he, resuming theconversation with Captain Wilson--for his notice of Briney was onlyparenthetical. 

Father Con now took the book, which was AEsop's Fables, and, inaccordance with Briney's intention, it opened exactly at the favoritefable of Gallus Gallinacexis. He was not aware, however, that Briney hadkept that place open during the preceding part of the week, in order toeffect this point. Father Philemy, however, was now beginning to relateanother anecdote to the Captain, and the thread of his narrative twinedrather ludicrously with that of the examination. 

Briney, after, a few hems, at length proceeded--"_Gallus Gallinaceus_, adung-hill cock--"

"So, Captain, I was just after coming out of Widow Moylan's--it was inthe Lammas fair--and a large one, by the by, it was--so, sir, who shouldcome up to me but Branagan. 'Well, Branagan, ' said I, 'how does theworld go now with you?'----"

"_Gallus Gallinaceus_, a dunghill cock----"

----"Says he. 'And how is that?' says I. 

"_Gallus Gallinaceus_----"

-----"Says he, 'Hut tut, Branagan, ' says I--'you're drunk. ' 'That'sthe thing, sir' says Branagan, 'and I want to explain it all to yourReverence. ' 'Well, ' said I, 'go on---"

"_Gallus Gallinaceus_, a dunghill cock----"

----"Says he, ----Let your Gallus Gallinaceus go to roost for this night, Con, " said Father Philemy, who did not relish the interruption of hisstory; "I say, Phaddhy, send the boy to bed, and bring him down in yourhand to my house on Saturday morning, and we will both examine him, but this is no time for it, and me engaged in conversation withCaptain Wilson. --So, Captain ____'Well, sir, ' says Branagan, and hestaggering, --'I took an oath against liquor, and I want your Reverenceto break it, ' says he. 'What do you mean?' I inquired. 'Why, please yourReverence, ' said he, 'I took an oath against liquor, as I told you, not to drink more nor a pint of whiskey in one day, and I want yourReverence to break it for me, and make it only half a pint; for I findthat a pint is too much for me; by the same token, that when I get thatfar, your Reverence, I disremember the oath entirely. "

The influence of the bottle now began to be felt, and the conversationabsolutely blew a gale, wherein hearty laughter, good strong singing, loud argument, and general good humor blended into one uproarious pealof hilarity, accompanied by some smart flashes of wit and humor whichwould not disgrace a prouder banquet. Phaddhy, in particular, meltedinto a spirit of the most unbounded benevolence--a spirit that would (ifby any possible means he could effect it) embrace the whole human race;that is to say, he would raise them, man, woman, and child, to the sameelevated state of happiness which he enjoyed himself. That, indeed, washappiness in perfection, as pure and unadulterated as the poteen whichcreated it. How could he be otherwise than happy?--he had succeeded to agood property, and a stocking of hard guineas, without the hard labor ofacquiring them; he had the "clargy" under his roof at last, partakingof a hospitality which he felt himself well able to afford them; he hadsettled with his Reverence for five years' arrears of sin, all of whichhad been wiped out of his conscience by the blessed absolving hand ofthe priest; he was training up Briney for the Mission, and though last, not least, he was--far gone in his seventh tumbler!

"Come, jinteels, " said he, "spare nothing here--there's lashings ofevery thing; thrate yourselves dacent, and don't be saying tomorrow ornext day, that ever my father's son was nagerly. Death alive, FatherCon, what are you doin'? Why, then, bad manners to me if that'll sarve, any how. "

"Phaddhy, " replied Father Con, "I assure you I have done my duty. "

"Very well, Father Con, granting all that, it's no sin to repate a goodturn you know. Not a word I'll hear, yer Reverence--one tumbler alongwith myself, if it was only for ould times. " He then filled Father Con'stumbler with his own hand, in a truly liberal spirit. "Arrah, FatherCon, do you remember the day we had the leapin'-match, and the bout atthe shoulder-stone?"

"Indeed, I'll not forget it, Phaddhy. "

"And it's yourself that may say that; but I bleeve I rubbed the consateoff of your Reverence--only that's betune ourselves, you persave. "

"You did win the palm, Phaddhy, I'll not deny it; but you are the onlyman that ever bet me at either of the athletics. '

"And I'll say this for yer Reverence, that you are one of the best andmost able-bodied gintlemen I ever engaged with. Ah! Father Con, I'm pastall that now--but no matter, here's yer Reverence's health, and a shake. Hands; Father Philomy, yer health, docthor: yer strange Reverence'shealth--Captain Wilson, not forgetting you, sir: Mr. Pettier, yours; andI hope to see you soon with the robes upon you, and to be able to pracheus a good sarmon. Parrah More--_wus dha lauv_ (* give me yer hand), you steeple you; and I haven't the smallest taste of objection to whatFather Philemy hinted at--yell obsarve. Kitty, you thief of the world, where are you? Your health, avourneen; come here, and give us your fist, Katty: bad manners to me if I could forget you afther all;--the bestcrathur, your Reverence, under the sun, except when yer Reverence putsyer _comedher_ on her at confession, and then she's a little, sharp orso, not a doubt of it: but no matther, Katty ahagur, you do it all forthe best. And Father Philemy, maybe it's myself didn't put the thrickupon you in the Maragy More, about Katty's death--ha, ha, ha! JackM'Craner, yer health--all yer healths, and yer welcome here, if youwar seven times as many. Briney, where are you, ma bouchal? Come up andshake hands wid yer father, as well as another--come up, acushla, andkiss me. Ah, Briney, my poor fellow, ye'll never be the cut of a man yerfather was; but no matther, avourneen, ye'll be a betther man, I hope;and God knows you may asy be that, for Father Philemy, I'm not what Iought to be, yer Reverence; however, I may mend, and will, maybe, beforea month of Sundays goes over me: but, for all that, Briney, I hope tosee the day when you'll be sitting an ordained priest at my own table;if I once saw that, I could die contented--so mind yer larning, acushla, and, his Reverence here will back you, and make inthorest to get youinto the college. Musha, God pity them crathurs at the door--aren'tthey gone yet? Listen to them coughin', for fraid we'd forget them: andthroth and they won't be forgot this bout any how--Katty, avourneen, give them every one, big and little, young and ould, theirskinful--don't lave a wrinkle in them; and see, take one of thembottles--the crathurs, they're starved sitting there all night inthe cowld--and give them a couple of glasses a-piece--it's good, yerReverence, to have the poor body's blessing at all times; and now, as Iwas saying, Here's all yer healths! and from the very veins of my heartyer welcome here. "

Our readers may perceive that Phaddhy

 "Was not only blest, but glorious, O'er a' the ills o' life victorious;"

for, like the generality of our peasantry, the _native_ drew to thesurface of his character those warm, hospitable, and benevolent virtues, which a purer system of morals and education would most certainly keepin full action, without running the risk, as in the present instance, ofmixing bad habits with frank, manly, and generous qualities. 

 * * * * *

"I'll not go, Con--I tell you I'll not go till I sing another song. Phaddhy, you're a prince--but where's the use of lighting more candlesnow, man, than you had in the beginning of the night? Is Captain Wilsongone? Then, peace be with him; it's a pity he wasn't on the right side, for he's not the worst of them. Phaddhy, where are you?"

"Why, yer Reverence, " replied Katty, "he's got a little unwell, and jistlaid down his head a bit. "

"Katty, " said Father Con, "you had better get a couple of the men toaccompany Father Philemy home; for though the night's clear, he doesn'tsee his way very well in the dark--poor man, his eye-sight's failing himfast. "

"Then, the more's the pity, Father Con. Here, Denis, let yourself andMat go home wid Father Philemy. "

"Good-night, Katty, " said Father Con--"Good-night: and may our blessingsanctify you all. "

"Good-night, Father Con, ahagur, " replied Katty; "and for goodness' sakesee that they take care of Father Philemy, for it's himself that's theblessed and holy crathur, and the pleasant gintleman out and out. "

"Good-night, Katty, " again repeated Father Con, as the cavalcadeproceeded in a body--"Good-night!" And so ended the Station. 

THE PARTY FIGHT AND FUNERAL. 

We ought, perhaps, to inform our readers that the connection between aparty fight and funeral is sufficiently strong to justify the author inclassing them under the title which is prefixed to this story. The onebeing usually the natural result of the other, is made to proceed fromit, as is, unhappily, too often the custom in real life among the Irish. 

It has been long laid down as a universal principle, thatself-preservation is the first law of nature. An Irishman, however, hasnothing to do with this; he disposes of it as he does with the otherlaws, and washes his hands out of it altogether. But commend him to afair, dance, funeral, or wedding, or to any other sport where there isa likelihood of getting his head or his bones broken, and if he survive, he will remember you with a kindness peculiar to himself to the lastday of his life--will drub you from head to heel if he finds that anymisfortune has kept you out of a row beyond the usual period of threemonths--will render the same service to any of your friends that standin need of it; or, in short, will go to the world's end, or fifty milesfarther, as he himself would say, to serve you, provided you canprocure him a bit of decent fighting. Now, in truth and soberness, itis difficult to account for this propensity; especially when the taskof ascertaining it is assigned to those of another country, or even tothose Irishmen whose rank in life places them too far from the customs, prejudices, and domestic opinions of their native peasantry, noneof which can be properly known without mingling with them. To my ownknowledge, however, it proceeds in a great measure from education. Andhere I would beg leave to point out an omission of which the severalboards of education have been guilty, and which, I believe, no one butmyself has yet been sufficiently acute and philosophical to ascertain, as forming a _sine qua non_ in the national instruction of the lowerorders of Irishmen. 

The cream of the matter is this:--a species of ambition prevails in theGreen Isle, not known in any other country. It is an ambition of aboutthree miles by four in extent; or, in other words, is bounded by thelimits of the parish in which the subject of it may reside. It putsitself forth early in the character, and a hardy perennial it is. In myown case, its first development was noticed in the hedge-school which Iattended. I had not been long there, till I was forced to declare myselfeither for the Caseys or the Murphys, two tiny factions, that had splitthe school between them. The day on which the ceremony of my declarationtook place was a solemn one. After school, we all went to the bottom ofa deep valley, a short distance from the school-house; up to the momentof our assembling there, I had not taken my stand under either banner:that of the Caseys was a sod of turf, stuck on the end of a brokenfishing-rod--the eagle of the Murphy's was a Cork red potato, hoistedin the same manner. The turf was borne by an urchin, who afterwardsdistinguished himself in fairs and markets as a _builla batthah_ (*cudgel player) of the first grade, and from this circumstance he wasnicknamed _Parrah Rackhan_. (* Paddy the Rioter) The potato was borneby little Mickle M'Phauden Murphy, who afterwards took away Katty BaneSheridan, without asking either her own consent or her father's. Theywere all then boys, it is true, but they gave a tolerable promise ofthat eminence which they subsequently attained. 

When we arrived at the bottom of the glen, the Murphys and the Caseys, including their respective followers, ranged themselves on either sideof a long line, which was drawn between the belligerent powers with thebut-end of one of the standards. Exactly on this line was I placed. Theword was then put to me in full form--"Whether will you side with thedacent Caseys, or the blackguard Murphys?" "Whether will you side withthe dacent Murphys, or the blackguard Caseys?" "The potato for ever!"said I, throwing up my caubeen, and running over to the Murphy standard. In the twinkling of an eye we were at it; and in a short time the deucean eye some of us had to twinkle. A battle royal succeeded, that lastednear half an hour, and it would probably have lasted above double thetime, were it not for the appearance of the "master, " who was seen by alittle shrivelled vidette, who wanted an arm, and could take no part inthe engagement. This was enough--we instantly radiated in all possibledirections, so that by the time he had descended through the intricaciesof the glen to the field of battle, neither victor nor vanquished wasvisible, except, perhaps, a straggler or two as they topped the brow ofthe declivity, looking back over their shoulders, to put themselves outof doubt as to their visibility by the master. They seldom looked invain, however, for there he usually stood, shaking at us his rod, silentlyprophetic of its application on the following day. This threat, for themost part, ended in smoke; for except he horsed about forty or fifty ofus, the infliction of impartial justice was utterly out of his power. 

[Illustration: PAGE 763-- Usually stood, shaking at us his rod]

But besides this, there never was a realm in which the evils of adivided cabinet were more visible: the truth is, the monarch himself wasunder the influence of female government--an influence which he feltit either contrary to his inclination or beyond his power to throwoff. "Poor Norah, long may you reign!" we often used to exclaim, to thevisible mortification of the "master, " who felt the benevolence of thewish bottomed upon an indirect want of allegiance to himself. Well, itwas a touching scene!--how we used to stand with the waistbands of oursmall-clothes cautiously grasped in our hands, with a timid show ofresistance, our brave red faces slobbered over with tears, as we stoodmarked for execution! Never was there a finer specimen of deprecationin eloquence than we then exhibited--the supplicating look right up intothe master's face--the touching modulation of the whine--the additionaltightness and caution with which we grasped the waistbands with onehand, when it was necessary to use the other in wiping our eyes andnoses with the polished sleeve-cuff--the sincerity and vehemence withwhich we promised never to be guilty again, still shrewdly including thecondition of present impunity for our offence:--"this--one--time--master, if ye plaise, sir;" and the utter hopelessness and despair whichwere legible in the last groan, as we grasp the "master's" leg in utterrecklessness of judgment, were all perfect in their way. Reader, haveyou ever got a reprieve from the gallows? I beg pardon, my dear sir; Ionly meant to ask, are you capable of entering into what a personage ofthat description might be supposed to feel, on being informed, after theknot had been neatly tied under the left ear, and the cap drawn over hiseyes, that her majesty had granted him a full pardon? But you rememberyour own schoolboy days, and that's enough. 

The nice discrimination with which Norah used to time her interferencewas indeed surprising. God help us! limited was our experience, andshallow our little judgments, or we might have known what the mastermeant, when with upraised arm hung over us, his eye was fixed upon thedoor of the kitchen, waiting for Norah's appearance. 

Long, my fair and virtuous countrywomen, I repeat it to you all, asI did to Norah--may you reign in the hearts and affections of yourhusbands (but nowhere else), the grace, ornaments, and happiness oftheir hearths and lives, you jewels, you! You are paragons of all that'sgood, and your feelings are highly creditable to yourselves and tohumanity. 

When Norah advanced, with her brawny, uplifted arm (for she was apowerful woman) and forbidding aspect, to interpose between us and theavenging, terrors of the birch, do you think that she did not reflecthonor on her sex and the national character! I sink the base allusionto the _miscaun_* of fresh butter, which we had placed in her hands thatmorning, or the dish of eggs, or of meal, which we had either begged orstolen at home, as a present for her; disclaiming, at the same time, therascally idea of giving it as a bribe, or from any motive beneath themost lofty minded and disinterested generosity on our part. 

 * A portion of butter, weighing from one pound to six or eight, made in the shape of a prism. 

Then again, never did a forbidding face shine with so winning andamicable an expression as did hers on that merciful occasion. The sundancing a hornpipe on Easter Sunday morning, or the full moon sailing asproud as a peacock in a new halo head-dress, was a very disrespectablesight, compared to Norah's red beaming face, shrouded in her dowd capwith long ears, that descended to her masculine and substantial neck. Owing to her influence, the whole economy of the school was good; forwe were permitted to cuff one another, and do whatever we pleased, withimpunity, if we brought the meal, eggs, or butter; except some scapegoatwho was not able to accomplish this, and he generally received on hisown miserable carcase what was due to us all. 

Poor Jack Murray! His last words on the scaffold, for being concerned inthe murder of Pierce the gauger, were, that he got the first of hisbad habits under Pat Mulligan and Norah--that he learned to steal bysecreting at home, butter and meal to paste up the master's eyes tohis bad conduct--and that his fondness for quarrelling arose from beingpermitted to head a faction at school; a most ungrateful return for themany acts of grace which the indulgence of Norah caused; to be issued inhis favor. 

I was but a short time under Pat, when, after the general example, Ihad my cudgel, which I used to carry regularly to a certain furzebush within fifty perches of the "seminary, " where I hid it till after"dismiss. *"! I grant it does not look well in me to become I my ownpanegyrist; but I can at least declare, that there were few among theGaseys able to, resist the prowess of this right arm, puny as it was atthe period in question. Our battles were obstinate and frequent; but asthe quarrels of the two families and their relations on each side, wereas bitter and pugnacious in fairs and markets as ours were in school, wehit upon the plan of holding our Lilliputian engagements upon the samedays on which our fathers and brothers contested. According to thisplan, it very often happened that the corresponding parties weresuccessful, and as frequently, that whilst the Caseys were well drubbedin the fair, their sons were victorious at school, and vice versa. 

For my part, I was early trained in cudgelling, and before I reached myfourteenth year, could pronounce as sage and accurate an opinion uponthe merits of a shillelagh, as it is called, or cudgel, as a veteranof sixty could at first sight. Our plan of preparing them was this: wesallied out to any place where there was an underwood of blackthorn oroak, and, having surveyed the premises with the eye of a connoisseur, weselected the straightest root-growing piece which we could find: forif not root-growing we did not consider it worth cutting, knowing fromexperience that a mere branch, how straight and fair soever it mightlook, would be apt to snap in the twist and tug of war. Having cut it asclose to the root as possible, we then lopped off the branches, andput it up the chimney to season. When seasoned, we took it down, andwrapping it in brown paper, well steeped in hog's lard or oil, we buriedit in a horse dunghill, paying it a daily visit for the purpose ofmaking it straight by doubling back the bends or angles across the knee, in a direction contrary to their natural tendency. Having daily repeatedthis until we had made it straight, and renewed the oil wrapping paperuntil the staff was perfectly saturated, we then rubbed it well with awoollen cloth, containing a little black-lead and grease, to give ita polish. This was the last process, except that if we thought it toolight at the top, we used to bore a hole in the lower end with a red-hotiron spindle, into which we poured melted lead, for the purpose ofgiving it the knock-down weight. 

There were very few of Paddy Mulligan's scholars without a choicecollection of such cudgels, and scarcely one who had not, before hisfifteenth year, a just claim to be called the hero of a hundred fights, and the heritor of as many bumps on the cranium as would strike bothGall and Spurzheim speechless. 

Now this, be it known, was, and in some districts yet is, an integralpart of an Irish peasant's education. In the northern parts of Ireland, where the population of the Catholics on the one side, and of Protestantand Dissenters on the other, is nearly equal, I have known therespective scholars of Catholic and Protestant schools to challenge eachother and meet half-way to do battle, in vindication of their respectivecreeds; or for the purpose of establishing the character of theirrespective masters as the more learned man; for if we were to judge bythe nature of the education then received, we would be led to concludethat a more commercial nation than Ireland was not on the face of theearth, it being the indispensable part of every scholar's business tobecome acquainted with the _three sets of Bookkeeping_. 

The boy who was the handiest and the most daring with the cudgel atPaddy Mulligan's school was Denis Kelly, the son of a wealthy farmerin the neighborhood. He was a rash, hot-tempered, good-natured lad, possessing a more than common share of this blackthorn ambition; onwhich account he was cherished by his relations as a boy that was likelyat a future period to be able to walk over the course of the parish, in fair, market, or patron. He certainly grew up a stout, able youngfellow; and before he reached nineteen years, was unrivalled at thepopular exercises of the peasantry. Shortly after that time he madehis debut in a party-quarrel, which took place in one of the ChristmasMargamores, (* Big Markets) and fully sustained the anticipations whichwere formed of him by his relations. For a year or two afterwards noquarrel was fought without him; and his prowess rose until he had gainedthe very pinnacle of that ambition which he had determined to reach. About this time I was separated from him, having found it necessity, in order to accomplish my objects in life, to reside with a relation inanother part of the country. 

The period of my absence, I believe, was about fifteen years, duringwhich space I heard no account of him whatsoever. At length, however, that inextinguishable attachment which turns the affections and memoryto the friends of our early days--to those scenes which we traversedwhen the heart was light and the spirits buoyant--determined me to makea visit to my native place, that I might witness the progress of timeand care upon those faces that were once so familiar to me; that I mightagain look upon the meadows, and valleys, and groves, and mountains, where I had so often played, and to which I still found myself bound bya tie that a more enlightened view of life and nature only made strongerand more enduring. I accordingly set off, and arrived late in theevening of a December day, at a little town within a few miles of mynative home. On alighting from the coach and dining, I determined towalk home, as it was a fine frosty night. The full moon hung in the blueunclouded firmament in all her lustre, and the stars shone out with thattremulous twinkling motion so peculiarly remarkable in frost. I had beenabsent, I said, about fifteen years, and felt that the enjoyment of thisnight would form an era in the records of my memory and my feelings. Ifind myself indeed utterly incapable of expressing what I experienced;but those who have ever been in similar circumstances will understandwhat I mean. A strong spirit of practical poetry and romance was uponme; and I thought that a commonplace approach in the open day wouldhave rendered my return to the scenes of my early life a very stale andunedifying matter. I left the inn at seven o'clock, and as I had onlyfive miles to walk, I would just arrive about nine, allowing myself tosaunter on at the rate of two miles and half per hour. My sensations, indeed, as I went along, were singular; and as I took a solitary roadthat went across the mountains, the loneliness of the walk, the deepgloom of the valleys, the towering height of the dark hills, and thepale silvery-light of a sleeping lake, shining dimly in the distancebelow, gave me such a distinct notion of the sublime and beautiful, asI have seldom since experienced. I recommend every man who has beenfifteen years absent from his native fields to return by moonlight. 

Well, there is a mystery yet undiscovered in our being, for no mancan know the full extent of his feelings or his capacities. Many aslumbering thought, and sentiment, and association reposes within him, of which he is utterly ignorant, and which, except he come in contactwith those objects whose influence over his mind can alone call theminto being, may never be awakened, or give him one moment of eitherpleasure or pain. There is, therefore, a great deal in the positionwhich we hold in society, and simply in situation. I felt this on thatnight: for the tenor of my reflections was new and original, and myfeelings had a warmth and freshness in them, which nothing but thesituation in which I then found myself could give them. The force ofassociation, too, was powerful; for, as I advanced nearer home, thenames of hills, and lakes, and mountains, that I had utterly forgotten, as I thought, were distinctly revived in my memory, and a crowd ofyouthful thoughts and feelings, that I imagined my intercourse with theworld and the finger of time had blotted out of my being, began to crowdafresh on my fancy. The name of, a townland would instantly return withits appearance; and I could now remember the history of families andindividuals that had long been effaced from my recollection. 

But what is even more singular is, that the superstitious terrors ofmy boyhood began to come over me as formerly, whenever a spot notedfor supernatural appearances met my eye. It was in vain that I exertedmyself to expel them, by throwing the barrier of philosophic reasoningin their way; they still clung to me, in spite of every effort to thecontrary. But the fact is, that I was, for the moment, the slave of amorbid and feverish sentiment, that left me completely at the mercy ofthe dark and fleeting images that passed over my fancy. I now came to aturn where the road began to slope down into the depths of a valleythat ran across it. When I looked forward into the bottom of it, all wasdarkness impenetrable, for the moon-beams were thrown off by the heightof the mountains that rose on each side of it. I felt an indefinitesensation of fear, because at that moment I recollected that it hadbeen, in my younger days, notorious as the scene of an apparition, where the spirit of a murdered pedlar had never been known to permita solitary traveler to pass without appearing to him, and walkingcheek-by-jowl along with him to the next house on the way, at which spothe usually vanished. The influence of my feelings, or, I should rathersay, the physical excitement of my nerves, was by no means slight, asthese old traditions recurred to me; although, at the same time, mymoral courage was perfectly unimpaired, so that, notwithstanding thisinvoluntary apprehension, I felt a degree of novelty and curiosity indescending the valley: "If it appear, " said I, "I shall at least satisfymyself as to the truth of apparitions. " My dress consisted of a long, dark surtout, the collar of which, as the night was keen, I had turnedup about my ears, and the corners of it met round my face. In additionto this I had a black silk handkerchief tied across my mouth to keep outthe night air, so that, as my dark fur traveling cap came down overmy face, there was very little of my countenance visible. I now hadadvanced half way into the valley, and all about me was dark and still:the moonlight was not nearer than the top of the hill which I wasdescending; and I often turned round to look upon it, so silvery andbeautiful it appeared in the distance. Sometimes I stopped for a fewmoments, admiring' its effect, and, contemplating the dark mountainsas they stood out against the firmament, then kindled into magnificentgrandeur by the myriads of stars that glowed in its expanse. There wasperfect silence and solitude around me; and, as I stood alone inthe dark chamber of the mountains, I felt the impressiveness of thesituation gradually supersede my terrors. A sublime sense of religiousawe descended on me; my soul kindled into a glow of solemn and elevateddevotion, which gave me a more intense perception of the presence of Godthan I had ever before experienced. "How sacred--how awful, " thought I, "is this place!--how impressive is this hour!--surely I feel myselfat the footstool of God! The voice of worship is in this deep, soul-thrilling silence, and the tongue of praise speaks, as it were, from the very solitude of the mountains!" I then thought of Him whowent up into the mountain-top to pray, and felt the majesty of thoseadmirable descriptions of the Almighty, given in the Old Testament, blend in delightful harmony with the beauty and fitness of the Christiandispensation, that brought light and immortality to light. "Here, " saidI, "do I feel that I am indeed immortal, and destined for scenes of amore exalted and comprehensive existence!"

I then proceeded further into the valley, completely freed from theinfluence of old and superstitious associations. A few porches belowme a small river crossed the road, over which was thrown a littlestone bridge of rude workmanship. This bridge was the spot on which theapparition was said to appear; and as I approached it, I felt thefolly of those terrors which had only a few minutes before beset me sostrongly. I found my moral energies recruited, and the dark phantasms ofmy imagination dispelled by the light of religion, which had refreshedme with a deep sense of the Almighty presence. I accordingly walkedforward, scarcely bestowing a thought upon the history of the place, and had got within a few yards of the bridge, when on resting my eyeaccidentally upon the little elevation formed by its rude arch, Iperceived a black coffin placed at the edge of the road, exactly uponthe bridge itself!

It may be evident to the reader, that, however satisfactory the forceof philosophical reasoning might have been upon the subject of thesolitude, I was too much the creature of sensation for an hour before, to look on such a startling object with firm nerves. For the first twoor three minutes, therefore, T exhibited as finished a specimen of thedastardly as could be imagined. My hair absolutely raised my capsome inches off my head; my mouth opened to an extent which I did notconceive it could possibly reach; I thought my eyes shot out from theirsockets, and my fingers spread out and became stiff, though powerless. The "_obstupui_" was perfectly realized in me, for, with the exceptionof a single groan, which I gave on first seeing the object, I found thatif one word would save my life, or transport me to my own fireside, Icould not utter it. I was also rooted to the earth, as if by magic;and although instant tergiversation and flight had my most heartyconcurrence, I could not move a limb, nor even raise my eyes offthe sepulchral-looking object which lay before me. I now felt theperspiration fall from my face in torrents, and the strokes of my heartfell audibly on my ear. I even attempted to say, "God preserve me!" butmy tongue was dumb and powerless, and could not move. My eye was stillupon the coffin, when I perceived that, from being motionless, itinstantly began to swing, --first in a lateral, then in a longitudinaldirection, although it was perfectly evident that no human hand wasnearer it than my own. At length I raised my eyes off it, for myvision was strained to an aching intensity, which I thought must haveoccasioned my eye-strings to crack. I looked instinctively about me forassistance--but all was dismal, silent, and solitary: even the moon haddisappeared among a few clouds that I had not noticed in the sky. 

As I stood in this state of indescribable horror, I saw the lightgradually fade away from the tops of the mountains, giving the scenearound me a dim and spectral ghastliness, which, to those who were neverin such a situation, is altogether inconceivable. 

At length I thought I heard a noise as it Were of a rushing tempest, sweeping from the hills down into the valley; but on looking up, I couldperceive nothing but the dusky desolation that brooded over the place. Still the noise continued; again I saw the coffin move; I then feltthe motion communicated to myself, and found my body borne and swungbackwards and forwards, precisely according to the motion of the coffin. I again attempted to utter a cry for assistance, but could not: themotion in my body still continued, as did the approaching noise in thehills. I looked up a second time in the direction in which the valleywound off between them, but judge of what I must have suffered, whenI beheld one of the mountains moving, as it were, from its base, andtumbling down towards the spot on which I stood! In the twinkling of aneye the whole scene, hills and all, began to tremble, to vibrate, and tofly round me, with a rapid, delirious motion; the stars shot back intothe depths of heaven, and disappeared; the ground on which I stood beganto pass from beneath my feet; a noise like the breaking of a thousandgigantic billows again burst from every direction, and I found myselfinstantly overwhelmed by some deadly weight, which prostrated me on theearth, and deprived me of sense and motion. 

I know not how long I continued in this state; but I remember that, onopening my eyes the first object that presented itself to me, was thesky glowing as before with ten thousand stars, and the moon walking inher unclouded brightness through the heavens. The whole circumstancethen rushed back upon my mind, but with a sense of horror very muchdiminished; I arose, and on looking towards the spot, perceived thecoffin in the same place. I then stood, and endeavoring to collectmyself, viewed it as calmly as possible; it was, however, as motionlessand distinct as when I first saw it. I now began to reason upon thematter, and to consider that it was pusillanimous in me to give way tosuch boyish terrors. The confidence, also, which my heart, only a shorttime before this, had experienced in the presence and protection ofthe Almighty, again returned, and, along with it, a degree of religiousfortitude, which invigorated my whole system. "Well, " thought I, "in thename of God I shall ascertain what you are, let the consequence be whatit may. " I then advanced until I stood exactly over it, and raisingmy foot gave it a slight kick. "Now, " said I, "nothing remains but toascertain whether it contains a dead body or not;" but on raising the endof it, I perceived by its lightness, that it was empty. To investigatethe cause of its being left in this solitary spot was, however, notwithin the compass of my philosophy, so I gave that up. On looking atit more closely, I noticed a plate, marked with the name and age ofthe person for whom it was intended, and on bringing my eyes near theletters, I was able, between fingering and reading, to make out the nameof my old cudgel-fighting school-fellow, Denis Kelly. 

This discovery threw a partial light upon the business; but I nowremembered to have heard of individuals who had seen black, unearthlycoffins, inscribed with the names of certain living persons; and thatthese were considered as ominous of the death of those persons. Iaccordingly determined to be certain that this was a real coffin; and asDenis's house was not more than a mile before me, I decided on carryingit that far, "If he be dead, " thought I, "it will be all light, andif not, we will see more about it. " My mind, in fact, was diseased byterror. I instantly raised the coffin, and as I found a rope lying onthe ground under it, I strapped it about my shoulders and proceeded: norcould I help smiling when I reflected upon the singular transition whichthe man of sentiment and sensation so strangely underwent;--from thesublime contemplation of the silent mountain solitude and the spangledheavens to the task of carrying a coffin! It was an adventure, however, and I was resolved to see how it would terminate. 

There was from the bridge an ascent in the road, not so gradual as thatby which I descended on the other side; and as the coffin was ratherheavy, I began to repent of having anything to do with it; for I wasby no means experienced in carrying coffins. The carriage of it was, indeed, altogether an irksome and unpleasant concern; for owing to myignorance of using the rope that tied it skilfully, it was every momentsliding down my back, dragging along the stones, or bumping against myheels: besides, I saw no sufficient grounds I had for entering upon theludicrous and odd employment of carrying another man's coffin, and wasseveral; times upon the point of washing my hands out of it altogether. But the novelty of the incident, and the mystery in which it wasinvolved, decided me in bringing it as far as Kelly's house, which wasexactly on my way home. 

I had yet half a mile to go; but I thought it would be best to strap itmore firmly about my body before I could start again: I therefore setit standing on its end, just at the turn of the road, until I shouldbreathe a little, for I was rather exhausted by a trudge under it ofhalf a mile and upwards. Whilst the coffin was in this position, Istanding exactly behind it (Kelly had been a tall man, consequentlyit was somewhat higher than I was), a crowd of people, bearing lights, advanced round the corner; and the first object which presented itselfto their vision, was the coffin in, that position, whilst I was totallyinvisible behind it. As soon as they saw it, there was an involuntarycry of consternation from the whole crowd; at this time I had the coffinonce more strapped firmly by a running knot to my shoulders, so thatI could loose it whenever I pleased. On seeing the party, and hearingcertain expressions which dropped from them, I knew at once that therehad been some unlucky blunder in the business on their part; and I wouldhave given a good deal to be out of the circumstances in which I thenstood. I felt that I could not possibly have accounted for my situation, without bringing myself in for as respectable a portion of rankcowardice as those who ran away from the coffin; for that it wasleft behind in a fit of terror, I now entertained no doubt whatever, particularly when I remembered the traditions connected with the spot inwhich I found it. 

"_Manim a Yea agus a wurrah!_"* exclaimed one of them, "if the black manhasn't brought it up from the bridge! _Dher a larna heena_**, hedid; for it was above the bridge we first seen him: jist for all theworld--the Lord be about us--as Antony and me war coming out on the roadat the bridge, there he was standing--a headless man, all black, withoutface or eyes upon him--and then we left the coffin and cut acrass thefields home. "

 * My soul to God and the Virgin. 

 ** By the very book--meaning the Bible, which, in the Irish, is not simply called the book, but the very book, or the book itself. 

"But where is he now, Eman?" said one of them, "are you sure you seenhim?"

"Seen him!" both exclaimed, "do you think we'd take to our scraperslike two hares, only we did; arrah, bad manners to you, do you think thecoffin could walk up wid itself from the bridge to this, only he broughtit?--isn't that enough?"

"Thrue for yez, " the rest exclaimed, "but what's to be done?"

"Why to bring the coffin home, now that we're all together, " anotherobserved; "they say he never appears to more than two at wanst, so hewon't be apt to show himself now, when we're together. "

"Well, boys, let two of you go down to it, " said one of them, "and we'llwait here till yez bring it up. "

"Yes, " said Eman Dhu, "do you go down, Owen, as you have the Scapular*on you, and the jug of holy water in your hand, and let Billy M'Shane, here repate the confeethurs (* _The Confiteor_) along wid you. "

 * The scapular is one of the highest religious orders, and is worn by both priest and layman. It is considered by the people a safeguard against evil both spiritual and physical. 

"Isn't it the same thing, Eman, " replied Owen, "if I shake the holywater on you, and whoever goes wid you? sure you know that if only onedhrop of it touched you, the devil himself couldn't harm you!"

"And what needs yourself be afraid, then, " retorted Eman; "and you hasthe Scapular on you to the back of that? Didn't you say, you war comingout, that if it was the devil, you'd disparse him?"

"You had betther not be mintioning his name, you _omadhaun_, " repliedthe other; "if I was your age, and hadn't a wife and childre on myhands, it's myself that would trust in God, and go down manfully; butthe people are hen-hearted now, besides what they used to be in mytime. "

During this conversation, I had resolved, if possible, to keep up thedelusion, until I could get myself extricated with due secrecy out ofthis ridiculous situation; and I was glad to find that, owing to theircowardice, there was some likelihood of effecting my design. 

"Ned, " said one of them to a little man, "go down and speak to it, as itcan't harm you. "

"Why sure, " said Ned, with a tremor in his voice, "I can speak to itwhere I am, widout going within rache of it. Boys, stand close to me:hem--In the name of--but don't you think I had betther spake to it inthe Latin I sarve mass* wid; it can't but answer that, for the sowl ofit, seeing it's a blest language?"

 * The person who serves mass, as it is called, is he who makes the responses to the priest during that ceremony. As the mass is said in Latin the serving of it must necessarily fall upon many who are ignorant of that language, and whose pronunciation of it is, of course, extremely ludicrous. 

"Very well, " the rest replied; "try that Ned; give it the best andginteelest grammar you have, and maybe it may thrate us dacent. "

Now it so happened that, in my schoolboy days, I had joined a class ofyoung fellows who were learning what is called the "_Sarvin' of Mass_"and had impressed it so accurately on a pretty retentive memory, thatI never forgot it. At length, Ned pulled, out his beads, and bedewedhimself most copiously with the holy water. He then shouted out, witha voice which resembled that of a man in an ague fit, "Dom-i-n-usvo-bis-cum?" "Et cum spiritu tuo, " I replied, in a husky sepulchraltone, from behind the coffin. As soon as I uttered these words, thewhole crowd ran back instinctively with fright; and Ned got so weak, that they were obliged to support him. 

"Lord have marcy on us!" said Ned; "hoys, isn't it an awful thing tospeak to a spirit? my hair is like I dunna what, it's sticking up sostiff upon my head. "

"Spake to it in English, Ned, " said they, till we hear what it will say. Ax it does anything trouble it; or whether its sowl's in Purgatory. "

"Wouldn't it be betther, " observed another, "to ax it who murthered it;maybe it wants to discover that?"

"In the--na-me of Go-o-d-ness, " said Ned, down to me, "what are you?"

"I'm the soul, " I replied in the same voice, "of the pedlar that wasmurdered on the bridge below. "

"And--who--was---it, sur, wid--submission, that--murdhered--you?"

To this I made no reply. 

"I say, " continued Ned, "in--the--name--of--G-o-o-d-ness--who wasit--that took the liberty of murdhering you, dacent man?"

"Ned Corrigan, " I answered, giving his own name. 

"Hem! God presarve us! Ned Corrigan!" he exclaimed. "What Ned, forthere's two of them--is it myself or the other vagabone?"

"Yourself, you murderer!" I replied. 

"Ho!" said Ned, getting quite stout, "is that you, neighbor? Come, now, walk out wid yourself out of that coffin, you vagabone you, whoever youare. "

"What do you mane, Ned, by spaking to it that-a-way?" the rest inquired. 

"Hut, " said Ned, "it's some fellow or other that's playing a thrick uponus. Sure I never knew either act nor part of the murdher, nor of themurdherers; and you know, if it was anything of that nature, it couldn'ttell me a lie, and me a Scapularian along wid axing it in God's name, with Father Feasthalagh's Latin. "

"Big tare-an'-ouns;" said the rest; "if we thought it was any man makingfun of us, but we'd crop the ears off his head, to tache him to bejoking!"

To tell the truth, when I heard this suggestion, I began to repent ofmy frolic; but I was determined to make another effort to finish theadventure creditably. 

"Ned, " said they, "throw some of the holy water on us all, and in thename of St. Pether and the Blessed Virgin, we'll go down and examine itin a body. "

This they considered a good thought, and Ned was sprinkling the waterabout him in all directions, whilst he repeated some jargon which wascompletely unintelligible. They then began to approach the coffin atdead-march time, and I felt that this was the only moment in which myplan could succeed; for had I waited until they came down all would havebeen discovered. As soon, therefore, as they began to move towards me, I also began, with equal solemnity, to retrograde towards them; so that, as the coffin was between us, it seemed to move without human means. 

"Stop, for God's sake, stop, "--shouted Ned; "it's movin'! It has madethe coffin alive; don't you see it thravelling this way widout hand orfoot, barring the boords?"

There was now a halt to ascertain the fact: but I still retrograded. This was sufficient; a cry of terror broke from the whole group, and, without waiting for further evidence, they set off in the directionthey came from, at full speed, Ned flinging the jug of holy water at thecoffin, lest the latter should follow, or the former encumber him in hisflight. Never was there so complete a discomfiture; and so eager werethey to escape, that several of them came down on the stones; andI could hear them shouting with desperation, and imploring the moreadvanced not to leave them behind. I instantly disentangled myself fromthe coffin, and left it standing exactly in the middle of the road, forthe next passenger to give it a lift as far as Denis Kelly's, if he feltso disposed. I lost no time in making the best of my way home; and onpassing poor Denis's house I perceived, by the bustle and noise within, that he was dead. 

I had given my friends no notice of this visit; my reception wasconsequently the warmer, as I was not expected. That evening was a happyone, which I shall long remember. At supper I alluded to Kelly, andreceived from my brother a full account, as given in the followingnarrative, of the circumstances which caused his death. 

"I need not remind you, Toby, of our schoolboy days, nor of theprinciples usually imbibed at such schools as that in which the two tinyfactions of the Caseys and the Murphys qualified themselves, amongthe latter of whom you cut so distinguished a figure. You will not, therefore, be surprised to hear that these two factions are as bitteras ever, and that the boys who at Pat Mulligan's school belabored eachother, in imitation of their brothers and fathers, continue to set thesame iniquitous example to their children; so that this groundless andhereditary enmity is likely to descend to future generations; unless, indeed, the influence of a more enlightened system of education maycheck it. But, unhappily, there is a strong suspicion of the objectproposed by such a system; so that the advantages likely to result fromit to the lower orders of the people will be slow and distant. "

"But, John, " said I, "now that we are upon that subject, let me ask whatreally is the bone of contention between Irish factions?"

"I assure you, " he replied, "I am almost as much at a loss, Toby, togive you a satisfactory answer, as if you asked me the elevation ofthe highest mountain on the moon; and I believe you would find equaldifficulty in ascertaining the cause of their feuds from the factionsthemselves. I really am convinced they know not, nor, if I rightlyunderstand them, do they much care. Their object is to fight, and theturning of a straw will at any time furnish them with sufficient groundsfor that. I do not think, after all, that the enmity between them ispurery personal: they do not hate each other individually; but havingoriginally had one quarrel upon some trifling occasion, the beaten partycannot bear the stigma of defeat without another trial of strength. Then, if they succeed, the onus of retrieving lost credit is thrown uponthe party that was formerly victorious. If they fail a second time, the double triumph of their conquerors excites them to a greaterdetermination to throw off the additional disgrace; and this species ofalternation perpetuates the evil. 

"These habits, however, familiarize our peasantry to acts of outrage andviolence--the bad passions are cultivated and nourished, until crimes, which peaceable men look upon with fear and horror, lose their realmagnitude and deformity in the eyes of Irishmen. I believe this kindof undefined hatred between either parties or nations, is the mostdangerous and fatal spirit which can pervade any portion of society. If you hate a man for an obvious and palpable injury, it is likelythat when he cancels that injury by an act of subsequent kindness, accompanied by an exhibition of sincere sorrow, you will cease to lookupon him as your enemy; but where the hatred is such that, while feelingyou cannot, on a sober examination of your heart, account for it, thereis little hope that you will ever be able to stifle the enmity that youentertain against him. This, however, in politics and religion, is whatis frequently designated as principle--a word on which men, possessinghigher and greater advantages than the poor ignorant peasantry ofIreland, pride themselves. In sects and parties, we may mark its effectsamong all ranks and nations. I therefore, seldom wish, Toby, to hear aman assert that he is of this party or that, from principle; for I amusually inclined to suspect that he is not, in this case, influenced byconviction. 

"Kelly was a man who, but for these scandalous proceedings among us, might have been now alive and happy. Although his temperament was warm, yet that warmth communicated itself to his good as well as to hisevil qualities. In the beginning his family were not attached to anyfaction--and when I use the word faction, it is in contradistinction tothe word party--for faction, you know, is applied to a feud or grudgebetween Roman Catholics exclusively. But when he was young, he ardentlyattached himself to the Murphys; and, having continued among them untilmanhood, he could not abandon them, consistently with that sense ofmistaken honor which forms so prominent a feature in the character ofthe Irish peasantry. But although the Kellys were not _faction-men_, they were bitter _party-men_, being the ringleaders of every quarrelWhich took place between the Catholics and Protestants, or, I shouldrather say, between the Orangemen and Whiteboys. 

"From the moment Denis attached himself to the Murphys, until the day hereceived the beating which subsequently occasioned his death, he neverwithdrew from them. He was in all their battles; and in course oftime, induced his relations to follow his example; so that, by generalconsent, they were nicknamed 'the Errigle Slashers. ' Soon after you leftthe country, and went to reside with my uncle, Denis married a daughterof little Dick Magrath's, from the Race-road, with whom he got a littlemoney. She proved a kind, affectionate wife; and, to do him justice, I believe he was an excellent husband. Shortly after his marriage hisfather died, and Denis succeeded him in his farm; for you knowthat, among the peasantry, the youngest generally gets the landedproperty--the elder children being obliged to provide for themselvesaccording to their ability, as otherwise a population would multiplyupon a portion of land inadequate to its support. 

"It was supposed that Kelly's marriage would have been the means ofproducing a change in him for the better, but it did not. He was, infact, the slave of a low, vain ambition, which constantly occasioned himto have some quarrel or other on his hands; and, as he possessed greatphysical courage and strength, he became the champion of the parish. It was in vain that his wife used every argument to induce him torelinquish such practices; the only reply he was in the habit of making, was a good-humored slap on the back and a laugh, saying, "'That's it, Honor; sure and isn't that the Magraths, all over, thatwould let the manest spalpeen that ever chewed cheese thramp upon them, without raising a hand in their own defence; and I don't blame you forbeing a coward, seeing that you have their blood in your veins--not butthat there ought to be something betther in you, afther all; for it'sthe M'Karrons, by your mother's side, that had the good dhrop of theirown in them, anyhow--but you're a Magrath out and out. '

"'And, Denis, ' Honor would reply, 'it would be a blessed day for theparish, if all in it were as peaceable as the same Magraths. There wouldbe no sore heads, nor broken bones, nor fighting, nor slashing of oneanother in fairs and markets, when people ought to be minding theirbusiness. You're ever and always at the Magraths, bekase they don't joinyou agin the Caseys or the Orangemen, and more fools they'd be to makeor meddle between you, having no spite agin either of them; and it wouldbe wiser for you to be _sed_ by the Magraths, and _red_ your hands outof sich ways altogether. What did ever the Murphys do to sarve youor any of your family, that you'd go to make a great man of yourselffighting for them? Or what did the poor Caseys do to make you go aginthe honest people? Arrah, bad manners to me, if you know what you'reabout, or if _sonse_ (* Good Luck) or grace can ever come of it; andmind my words, Denis, if God hasn't said it, you'll live to rue yourfolly for the same work. '

"At this Denis would laugh heartily. 'Well said, Honor _Magrath_, butnot _Kelly_, Well, it's one comfort that our childher aren't likely tofollow your side of the house, any way. Come here, Lanty; come over, acushla, to your father! Lanty, ma bouchal, what 'ill you do when yougrow a man?"

"'I'll buy a horse of my own to ride on, daddy. '

"'A horse, Lanty! and so you will, ma bouchal; but that's not it--surethat's not what I mane, Lanty. What 'ill you do to the Caseys?"

"'Ho, ho! the Caseys! I'll bate the blackguards wid your blackthorn, daddy!'

"'Ha, ha, ha! that's my stout man, my brave little soger! _Wus dha lamhavick!_--give me your hand, my son! Here, Nelly, ' he would say to thechild's eldest sister, 'give him a brave whang of bread, to makehim able to bate the Caseys. Well, Lanty, who more will you leather, ahagur?'

"'All the Orangemen; I'll kill all the Orangemen!'

"This would produce another laugh from the father, who would again kissand shake hands with his son, for these early manifestations of his ownspirit. 

"'Lanty, ma bouchal, ' he would say, 'thank God, you're not a _Magrath_;'tis you that's a _Kelly_, every blessed inch of you! and if you turnout as good a _buillagh balthah_ as your father afore you, I'll becontint, avour-neen!'

"'God forgive you, Denis, ' the-wife would reply, 'it's long before you'dthink of larning him his prayers, or his cateehiz, or anything that'sgood! Lanty, agra, come over to myself, and never heed what that mansays; for, except you have some poor body's blessing, he'll bring you tono good. '

"Sometimes, however, Kelly's own natural good sense, joined with theremonstrances of his wife, prevailed for a short time, and he wouldwithdraw himself from the connection altogether; but the force of habitand of circumstances was too strong in him, to hope that he couldever overcome it by his own firmness, for he was totally destitute ofreligion. The peaceable intervals of his life were therefore very short. 

"One summer evening I was standing in my own garden, when I saw a mangalloping up towards me at full speed. When he approached, I recognizedhim as one of the Murphy faction, and perceived that he was cut andbleeding. 

"'Murphy, ' said I, 'What's the matter!'

"'Hard fighting, sir, ' said he, 'is the matter. The Caseys gathered alltheir faction, bekase they heard that Denis Kelly has given us up, andthey're sweeping the street wid us. I'm going hot foot for Kelly, sir, for even the very name of him will turn the tide in our favor. Alongwid that, I have sent in a score of the Duggans, and, if I get in Denis, plase God we'll clear the town of them!'

"He then set off, but pulled up abruptly, and said, "'Arrah, Mr. Darcy, maybe you'd be civil enough to lind me the loan ofa sword, or bagnet, or gun, or anything that way, that would besarviceable to a body on a pinch?'

"'Yes!' said I, 'and enable you to commit murder? No, no, Murphy;I'm sorry it's not in my power to put a final stop to such dangerousquarrels!'

"He then dashed off, and in the course of a short time I saw him andKelly, both on horseback, hurrying into the town in all possible haste, armed with their cudgels. The following day, I got my dog and gun, andsauntered about the hills, making a point to call upon Kelly. I foundhim with his head tied up, and his arm in a sling. 

"'Well, Denis, ' said I, 'I find you have kept your promise of giving upquarrels!'

"And so I did, sir, ' said Denis; 'but, sure you wouldn't have me for togo desart them, when the Caseys war three to one over them? No; God bethanked, I'm not so mane as that, anyhow. Besides, they welted both mybrothers within an inch of their lives. '

"'I think they didn't miss yourself, ' said I. 

"'You may well say they did not, sir, ' he replied: 'and, to tell God'struth, they thrashed us right and left out of the town, although werallied three times, and came in agin. At any rate, it's the firsttime for the last five years that they dare go up and down the street, calling out for the face of a Murphy, or a Kelly; for they're as bitternow agin us as agin the Murphys themselves. '

"'Well, I hope, Denis, ' I observed, 'that what occurred yesterday willprevent you from entering into their quarrels in future. Indeed, I shallnot give over, until I prevail on you to lead a quiet and peaceablelife, as the father of a rising family ought to do. '

"'Denis, ' said the wife, when I alluded to the children, looking athim with a reproachful and significant expression--'Denis, do you hearthat!--the father of a family, Denis! Oh, then, God look down on thatfamily; but it's--Musha, God bless you and yours, sir, ' said she to me, dropping that part of the subject abruptly; 'it's kind of you to troubleyourself about him, at all at all: it's what them that has a betterright to do it, doesn't do. '

"'I hope, ' said I, 'that Denis's own good sense will show him the follyand guilt of his conduct, and that he will not, under any circumstances, enter into their battles in future. Come, Denis, will you promise methis?'

"'If any man, ' replied Denis, 'could make me do it, it's yourself, sir, or any one of your family; but if the priest of the parish was to godown on his knees before me, I wouldn't give it up till we give themvagabone Caseys one glorious battherin, ' which, plase God, we'll do, andare well able to do, before a month of Sundays goes over us. Now, sir, you needn't say another word, ' said he, seeing me about to speak; 'forby Him that made me we'll do it! If any man, I say, could persuade meagin it, you could; but, if we don't pay them full interest for what wegot, why my name's not Denis Kelly--ay, sweep them like varmint out ofthe town, body and sleeves!'

"I saw argument would be lost on him, so I only observed, that I fearedit would eventually end badly. 

"'Och, many and many's the time, Mr. Darcy, ' said Honor, 'I prophesiedthe same thing; and, if God hasn't said it, he'll be coming home acorpse to me some day or other; for he got as much bating, sir, aswould be enough to kill a horse; and, to tell you God's truth, sir, he'sbreeding up his childher--'

"'Honor, ' said Kelly, irritated, 'whatever I do, do I lave it in yourpower to say that I'm a bad husband? so don't rise me by your talk, forI don't like to be provoked. I know it's wrong, but what can I do? Wouldyou have me for to show the Garran-bane, * and lave them like a cowardlythraitor, now that the other faction is coming up to be their match?No; let what will come of it, I'll never do the mane thing--death beforedishonor!'

 * The white horse, i. E. , be wanting in mettle. Tradition affirms that James the Second escaped on a white horse from the battle of the Boyne; and from this circumstance a white horse has become the emblem of cowardice. 

"In this manner Kelly went on for years; sometimes, indeed, keepingquiet for a short period, but eventually drawn in, from the apprehensionof being reproached with want of honor and truth, to his connection. This, truly, is an imputation which no peasant could endure; nor, werehe thought capable of treachery, would he be safe from the vengeance ofhis own party. Many a time have I seen Kelly reeling home, his headand face sadly cut, the blood streaming from him, and his wife and someneighbor on each side of him--the poor woman weeping and deploring thesenseless and sanguinary feuds in which her husband took so active apart. 

"About three miles from this, down at the Long Ridge, where the Shannonslive, dwelt a family of the Grogans, cousins to Denis. They wereanything but industrious, although they might have lived veryindependently, having held a farm on what they called an old take, whichmeans a long lease taken out when lands were cheap. It so happened, however, that, like too many of their countrymen, they paid littleattention to the cultivation of their farm; the consequence of whichneglect was, that they became embarrassed, and overburdened witharrears. Their landlord was old Sam Simmons, whose only fault to histenants was an excess of indulgence, and a generous disposition whereverhe could possibly get an opportunity to scatter his money about him, upon the spur of a benevolence which, it would seem, never ceasedgoading him to acts of the most Christian liberality and kindness. Alongwith these excellent qualities, he was remarkable for a most rootedaversion to law and lawyers; for he would lose one hundred pounds ratherthan recover that sum by legal proceedings, even when certain that fivePounds would effect it; but he seldom or never was known to pardon abreach of the peace. 

"I have always found that an excess of indulgence in a landlord neverfails ultimately to injure and relax the industry of the tenant; atleast, this was the effect which his forbearance produced on them. Butthe most extraordinary good-nature has its limits, and so had his; afterrepeated warning, and the most unparalleled patience on his part, hewas at length compelled to determine on at once removing them fromhis estate, and letting his land to some more efficient and deservingtenant. He accordingly desired them to remove their property from thepremises, as he did not wish, he said, to leave them without the meansof entering upon another farm, if they felt so disposed. This theyrefused to do; adding, that they would, at least, put him to the expenseof ejecting them. He then gave orders to his agent to seize; but they, in the mean time, had secreted their effects by night among theirfriends and relations, sending a cow to this one, and a horse to that;so that, when the bailiff came to levy his execution, he found verylittle, except the empty walls. They were, however, ejected withoutceremony, and driven altogether off the farm, for which they hadactually paid nothing for the three preceding years. In the mean timethe farm was advertised to be let, and several persons had offeredthemselves as tenants; but what appeared very remarkable was, that theRoman Catholics seldom came a second time to make any further inquiryabout it; or, if they did, Simmons observed that they were sure towithdraw their proposals, and ultimately decline having anything to dowith it. 

"This was a circumstance which he could not properly understand; butthe fact was, that the peasantry were almost to a man members of awidely-extending system of agrarian combination, the secret influence ofwhich intimidated such of their own religion as intended to take it, andprevented them from exposing themselves to the penalty which they knewthose who should dare to occupy it must pay. In a short time, however, the matter began to be whispered about, until it spread gradually, dayafter day, through the parish, that those who already had proposed, orintended to propose, were afraid to enter upon the land on any terms. Hitherto, it is true, these threats floated about only in the vague formof rumor. 

"The farm had been now unoccupied for about a year; party spirit ranvery high among the peasantry, and no proposals came in, or were at alllikely to come. Simmons then got advertisements printed, and had themposted up in the most conspicuous parts of this and the neighboringparishes. It was expected, however, that they would be torn down; but, instead of that, there was a written notice posted up immediately undereach, which ran in the following words:--

 "'Take Notess. 

 "'Any man that'll dare to take the farm belonging to smooth Sam Simmons, and sitivated at the long ridge, will be flayed alive. 

 "' Mat Midnight. 

 "'B. N. --It's it that was latterrally occupied by the Grogans. '

"This occasioned Simmons and the other magistrates of the barony tohold a meeting, at which they subscribed to the amount of fifty poundsas a reward for discovering the author or authors of the threateningnotice; but the advertisement containing the reward, which was postedin the usual places through the parish, was torn down on the first nightafter it was put up. In the meantime, a man, nicknamed Vengeance--VeseyVengeance, in consequence of his daring and fearless spirit, and hisbitterness in retaliating injury--came to Simmons, and proposed for thefarm. The latter candidly mentioned the circumstances of the notice, andfairly told him that he was running a personal risk in taking it. 

"'Leave that to me, sir, ' said Vengeance; 'if you will set me the farm atthe terms I offer, I am willing to become your tenant; and let them thatposted up the notices go to old Nick, or, if they annoy me, let themtake care I don't send them there. I am a true blue, sir--a purpleman*--have lots of fire-arms, and plenty of stout fellows in the parishready and willing to back me; and, by the light of day if they make ormeddle with me or mine, we will hunt them in the face of the world, like so many mad dogs, out of the country: what are they but a pack ofribles, that would cut our throats, if they dared?'

 * These terms denote certain stages of initiation in the Orange system

"'I have no objection, ' said Simmons, 'that you should express a firmdetermination to defend your life and protect your property; but Iutterly condemn the spirit with which you seem to be animated. Betemperate and sober, but be firm. I will afford you every assistance andprotection in my power, both as a magistrate and a landlord; but ifyou speak so incautiously, the result may be serious, if not fatal, toyourself. '

"Instead of that, ' said Vengeance, 'the more a man appears to be afeard, the more danger he is in, as I know by what I have seen; but, at anyrate, if they injure me, I wouldn't ask better sport than taking downthe ribles--the bloody-minded villains! Isn't it a purty thing that aman darn't put one foat past the other only as they wish. By the lighto' day, I'll pepper them!'

"Shortly after this, Vengeance, braving all their threats, removed tothe farm, and set about its cultivation with skill and vigor. He hadnot been long there, however, when, a notice was posted one night onhis door, giving him ten days to clear off from this interdicted spot, threatening, in case of non-compliance, to make a bonfire of the houseand offices, inmates included. The reply, which Vengeance made to thiswas fearless and characteristic. He wrote another notice, whichhe posted on the chapel-door, stating that he would not budge aninch--recommending, at the same time, such as intended paying him anightly visit to be careful that they might not chance to go home withtheir heels foremost. This, indeed, was setting them completely atdefiance, and would, no doubt have been fatal to Vesey, were it not fora circumstance which I will now relate:--In a little dell, below Vesey'shouse, lived a poor woman, called Doran, a widow; she inhabited a smallhut, and was principally supported by her two sons, who were servants, one to a neighboring farmer, a Roman Catholic, and the other to Dr. Ableson, rector of the parish. He who had been with the rector lost hishealth shortly before Vengeance succeeded the Grogans as occupier ofthe land in question, and was obliged to come home to his mother. He wasthen confined to his bed, from which, indeed, he never rose. 

"This boy had been his mother's principal support--for the other wasunsettled, and paid her but little attention, being like most of thosein his situation, fond of drinking, dancing, and attending fairs. Inshort, he became a Ribbonman, and consequently was obliged to attendtheir nightly meetings. Now it so happened that for a considerable timeafter the threatening notice had been posted on Vengeance's door, hereceived no annoyance, although the period allowed for his departure hadbeen long past, and the purport of the paper uncomplied with. Whetherthis proceeded from an apprehension on the part of the Ribbonmenof receiving a warmer welcome than they might wish, or whether theydeferred the execution of their threat until Vengeance might be off hisguard, I cannot determine; but the fact is, that some months had elapsedand Vengeance remained hitherto unmolested. 

"During this interval the distress of Widow Doran had become known tothe inmates of his family, and his mother--for she lived with him--usedto bring down each day some nourishing food to the sick boy. In thesekind offices she was very punctual; and so great was the poverty of thepoor widow, and so destitute the situation of her sick son, that, infact, the burden of their support lay principally upon Vengeance'sfamily. 

"Vengeance was a small, thin man, with fair hair, and fiery eyes;his voice was loud and shrill, his utterance rapid, and the generalexpression of his countenance irritable. His motions were so quick, thathe rather seemed to run than walk. He was a civil, obliging neighbor, but performed his best actions with a bad grace; a firm, unflinchingfriend, but a bitter and implacable enemy. Upon the whole he wasgenerally esteemed and respected--though considered as an eccentriccharacter, for such indeed he was. On hearing of Widow Doran's distress, he gave orders that a portion of each meal should be regularly sentdown to her and her son; and from that period forward they were bothsupported principally from his table. 

"In this way some months had passed, and still Vengeance was undisturbedin his farm. It often happened, however, that Doran's other son cameto see his brother; and during these visits it was but natural thathis mother and brother should allude to the kindness which they dailyexperienced from Vesey. 

"One night, about twelve o'clock, a tap came to Widow Doran's door, whohappened to be attending the invalid, as he was then nearly in the laststage of his illness. When she opened it, the other son entered, in anevident hurry, having the appearance of a man who felt deep and seriousanxiety. 

"'Mother, ' said he, 'I was very uneasy entirely about Mick, and juststarted over to see him, although they don't know at home that I'm out, so I can't stay a crack; but I wish you would go to the door for two orthree minutes, as I have something to say to him. '

"'Why, thin, Holy Mother!--Jack, a-hagur, is there anything the matther, for you look as if you had seen something?'*

 * This phrase means--you look as if you had seen a ghost; it is a very common one. 

"'Nothing worse than myself, mother, ' he replied; 'nor there's nothingthe matther at all--only I have a few words to say to Mick here, that'sall. '

"The mother accordingly removed herself out of hearing. 

"'Mick, ' says the boy, 'this is a bad business--I wish to God I wasclear and clane out of it. '

"'What is it?' said Mick, alarmed. "' Murther, I'm afeard, if Goddoesn't turn it off of them, somehow. 

"'What do you mane, man, at all?' said the invalid, raising himself, indeep emotion, on his elbow, from his poor straw bed. 

"'Vengeance, ' said he--'Vengeance, man--he's going to get it. I was outwith the boys on Sunday evening, and at last it's agreed on to visithim to-morrow night. I'm sure and sartin he'll never escape, for there'smore in for him than taking the farm, and daring them so often as hedid--he shot two fingers off of a brother-in-law of Jem Reilly's onenight that they war on for threshing him, and that's coming home to himalong with the rest. '

"'In the name of God, Jack, ' inquired Mick, 'what do they intend to doto him?'

"' Why, ' replied Jack, 'it's agreed to put a coal in the thatch, in thefirst place; and although they were afeared to name what he's to getbesides, I doubt they'll make a spatchcock of himself. They won't meddlewith any other of the family, though--but he's down for it. '

"'Are you to be one of them?' asked Mick. 

"'I was the third man named, ' replied the other, 'bekase, they said, Iknew the place. '

"'Jack, ' said his emaciated brother, with much solemnity, raisinghimself up in the bed--'Jack, if you have act or part in that bloodybusiness, God in his glory you'll never see. Fly the country--cut off afinger or toe--break your arm--or do something that may prevent you frombeing there. Oh, my God!' he exclaimed, whilst the tears fell fast downhis pale cheeks--'to go to murder the man, and lave his little familywidout a head or a father over them, and his wife a widow! To burn hisplace, widout rhime, or rason, or offince! Jack, if you go, I'll diecursing you. I'll appear to you--I'll let you rest neither night norday, sleeping nor waking, in bed or out of bed. I'll haunt you, tillyou'll curse the very hour you war born. '

"'Whist, Micky, ' said Jack, 'you're frightening me: I'll not go--willthat satisfy you?'

"'Well, dhrop down on your two knees, there, ' said Micky, 'and swearbefore the God that has his eye upon you this minute, that you'll haveno hand in injuring him or his, while you live. If you don't do this, I'll not rest in my grave and maybe I'll be a corpse before mornin. '

"'Well Micky, said Jack, who though wild and unthinking, was a lad whoseheart and affections were good, 'it would be hard for me to refuseyou that much, and you! not likely to be long wid me--I will;' and heaccordingly knelt down and swore solemnly, in words which his brotherdictated to him, that he would not be concerned in the intended murder. 

"'Now, give me your hand, Jack, ' said the invalid; 'God bless you--andso He will. Jack, if I depart before I see you again, I'll die happy. That man has supported me and my mother for near the last three months, bad as you all think him. Why, Jack, we would both be dead of hungerlong ago, only for his family; and, my God! to think, of such amurdhering intention makes my blood run cowld'--

"'You had better give him a hint, then, ' said Jack, 'some way, or he'llbe done for, as sure as you're stretched on that bed; but don't mintionnames, if you wish to keep me from being murdhered for what I did. I must be off now, for I stole out of the barn:* and only that AttyLaghy's gone along wid the master to the ---- fair, to help him to sellthe two coults, I couldn't get over at all. '

 * Laboring servants in Ireland usually sleep in barns. 

"'Well, go home, Jack, and God bless you, and so He will, for what youdid this night. '

"Jack accordingly departed, after bidding his mother and brotherfarewell. 

"When the old woman came in, she asked her son if there was anythingwrong with his brother, but he replied that there was not. 

"'Nothing at all, ' said he--'but will you get up airly in the morning, plase God, and tell Vesey Johnston that I want to see him; and--that--Ihave a great dale to say to him?'

"' To be sure I will, Micky; but, Lord guard us, what ails you, avourneen, you look so frightened?'

"'Nothing at all, at all, mother; but will you go where I say airlyto-morrow, for me?'

"'It's the first thing I'll do, God willin', ' replied the mother. Andthe next morning Vesey was down with the invalid very early, for the oldwoman kept her word and paid him a timely visit. 

"'Well, Micky, my boy, ' said Vengeance, as he entered the hut, 'I hopeyou're no worse this morning. '

"'Not worse, sir, ' replied Mick; 'nor, indeed, am I anything bettereither, but much the same way. Sure it's I that knows very well that mytime here is but short. '

"'Well, Mick, my boy, ' said Vengeance, 'I hope you're prepared fordeath--and that you expect forgiveness, like a Christian. Look up, myboy, to God at once, and pitch the priests and their craft to ould Nick, where they'll all go at the long-run. '

"'I b'lieve, ' said Mick, with a faint smile, 'that you're not very fondof the priests, Mr. Johnston; but if you knew the power they possess aswell as I do, you wouldn't spake of them so bad, anyhow. '

"'Me fond of them!' replied the other;' 'why, man, they're a set of themost gluttonous, black-looking hypocrites that ever walked on neat'sleather; and ought to be hunted out of the country--hunted out of thecountry, by the light of day! every one of them; for they do nothing butegg up the people against the Protestants. '

"'God help you, Mr. Johnston, ' replied the invalid, 'I pity you frommy heart for the opinion you hould about them. I suppose if you weresthruck dead on the spot wid a blast from the fairies, that you think apriest couldn't cure you by one word's spaking?'

"'Cure me!' said Vengeance, with a laugh of disdain; 'by the light ofday! if I caught one of them curing me, I'd give him the purtiest chaseyou ever saw in your life, across the hills. '

"'Don't you know, ' said Mick, 'that priest Dannelly cured Bob Beaty ofthe falling sickness--until he broke the vow that was laid upon him, of not going into a church, and the minute he crossed the church-door, didn't he dhrop down as bad as ever--and what could the minister do forhim?'

"'And don't you know, ' rejoined Vengeance, 'that that's all a parcel ofthe most lying stuff possible; lies--lies--all lies--and vagabondism?Why, Mick, you Papishes worship the priests; you think they can bringyou to heaven at a word. By the light of day, they must have good sportlaughing at you, when they get among one another. Why don't they teachyou and give you the Bible to read, the ribelly rascals? but they'reafraid you'd know too much then. '

"'Well, Mr. Johnston, ' said Mick, 'I b'lieve you'll never have a goodopinion of them, at any rate. '

"'Ay, when the sky falls, ' replied Vengeance; 'but you're now on yourdeath bed, and why don't you pitch them to ould Nick, and get a Bible?Get a Bible, man; there's a pair of them in my house, that's never usedat all--except my mother's, and she's at it night and day. I'll send oneof them down to you: turn yourself to God--to your Redeemer, that diedon the mount of Jehosha-phat, or somewhere about Jerusalem, for yoursins--and don't go out of the world from the hand of a rascally priest, with a band about your eyes, as if you were at blind-man's-buff, for, bythe light of day, you're as blind as a bat in a religious way. '

"'There's no use in sending me a Bible, ' replied the invalid, 'for Ican't read it: but, whatever you may think, I'm very willing to lave mysalvation with my priest. '

"'Why, man, ' observed Vengeance, 'I thought you were going to havesense at last, and that you sent for me to give you some spiritualconsolation. '

"'No, sir, ' replied Mick; 'I have two or three words to spake to you. '

"'Come, come, Mick, now that we're on a spiritual subject, I'll hearnothing from you till I try whether it's possible to give you a truteinsight into religion. Stop, now, and let us lay our heads together, that we may make out something of a dacenter creed for you to believein than the one you profess. Tell me the truth, do you believe in thepriests?'

"'How?' replied Mick; 'I believe that they're holy men--but I know theycan't save me widout the Redeemer and His blessed mother, '

"'By the light above us, you're shuffling, Mick--I say you do believe inthem--now, don't tell me to the contrary--I say you're shuffling as fastas possible. '

"'I tould you truth, sir, ' replied Mick; 'and if you don't believe me, Ican't help it. '

"'Don't trust in the priests, Mick; that's the main point to secure yoursalvation. '

"Mick, who knew his prejudices against the priests, smiled faintly, andreplied--

"'Why, sir, I trust in them as bein' able to make inthercession wid Godfor me, that's all'

"'They make intercession! By the stool I'm sitting on, a single wordfrom one of them would ruin you. They, a set of ribles, to make interestfor you in heaven! Didn't they rise the rebellion in Ireland?--answer methat. '

"'This is a subject, sir, we would never agree on, ' replied Mick. 

"'Have you the Ten Commandments?' inquired Vesey. 

"'I doubt my mimory's not clear enough to have them in my mind, 'said the lad, feeling keenly the imputation of ignorance, which heapprehended from Vesey's blunt observations. 

"Vesey, however, had penetration enough to perceive his feelings, and, with more delicacy than could be expected from him, immediately movedthe question. 

"'No matter, Mick, ' said he, 'if you would give up the priests, wewould get over that point: as it is, I will give you a lift in theCommandments; and, as I said a while ago, ' if you take my advice, I'llwork up a creed for you that you may depend upon. But now, for theCommandments--let me see. 

"'First: Thou shalt have no other gods but me. Don't you see, man howthat peppers the priests?'

"'Second: Remember that thou keep holy the Sabbath-day. '

"'Third: That shalt not make to thyself--no, hang it no!--I'mout--that's the Second--very right. Third: Honor thy father andthy mother--you understand that, Mick? It means that you are boundto--to--just so--to honor your father and your mother, poor woman. '

"'My father--God be good to him!--is dead near fourteen years, sir, 'replied Mick. 

"'Well, in that case, Mick, you see all that's left for you is to honoryour mother--although I'm not certain of that either; the Commandmentsmake no allowance at all for death, and in that case why, living ordead, the surest way is to respect and obey them--that is, if thething were'nt impossible. I wish we had blind George M'Girr here, Mick;although he's as great a rogue as ever escaped hemp, yet he'd beat thedevil himself at a knotty point. '

"'His breath would be bad about a dying man, ' observed Mick. 

"'Ay, or a living one, ' said Vesey; 'however, let us get on--we were atthe Third. Fourth: Thou shalt do no murder. '

"At the word murder, Mick started, and gave a deep groan, whilst hiseyes and features assumed a gaunt and hollow expression, resembling thatof a man struck with an immediate sense of horror and affright. 

"'Oh! for heaven's sake, sir, stop there, ' said Doran, 'that brings tomy mind the business I had with you, Mr. Johnston. '

"'What is it about?' inquired Vengeance, in his usual eager manner. 

"'Do you mind, ' said Mick, 'that a paper was stuck one night upon yourdoor, threatening you, if you wouldn't lave that farm you're in?'. 

"'I do, the blood-thirsty villains! but they knew a trick worth two ofcoming near me. '

"'Well, ' said Mick, 'a strange man, that I never seen before, came intome last night, and tould me, if I'd see you, to say that you would get avisit from the boys this night, and to take care of yourself. '

"'Give me the hand, Mick, ' said Vengeance, --'give me the hand; in spiteof the priests, by the light of day you're an honest fellow. This nightyou say, they're to come? And what are the bloody wretches to do, Mick. But I needn't ask that, for I suppose it's to murder myself, and to burnmy place. 

"'I'm afeard, sir, you're not far from the truth, ' replied Mick; 'but, Mr. Johnston, for God's sake don't mintion my name; for, if you do, I'llget myself what they were laying out for you, be bumed in my bed maybe. '

"'Never fear, Mick, ' replied Vengeance; 'your name will never cross mylips. '

"'It's a great thing, ' said Mick, 'that would make me turn informer: butsure, only for your kindness and the goodness of your family, the Lordspare you to one another! mightn't I be dead long ago? I couldn't haveone minute's peace if you or yours came to any harm when I could previntit. '

"'Say no more, Mick, ' said Vengeance, taking his hand again; 'I knowthat, leave the rest to me; but how do you find yourself, my poorfellow? You look weaker than you did, a good deal. '

"'Indeed I'm going very fast, sir, ' replied Mick; 'I know it'll soon beover with me. '

"'Hut, no, man, ' said Vengeance, drawing his hand rapidly across hiseyes, and clearing his voice, 'not at all--don't say so; would a littlebroth serve you? or a bit of fresh meat?--or would you have a fancy foranything that I could make out for you? I'll get you wine, if you thinkit would do you good. "

"'God reward you, ' said Mick feebly--'God reward you, and open your eyesto the truth. Is my mother likely to come in, do you think?'

"'She must be here in a few minutes, ' the other replied; 'she waswaiting till they'd churn, that she might bring you down a little freshmilk and butter. '

"'I wish she was wid me, ' said the poor lad, 'for I'm lonely wantin'her--her voice and the very touch of her hands goes to my heart. Mother, come home, and let me lay my head upon your breast, agra machree, for Ithink it will be for the last time: we lived lonely, avourneen, wid nonebut ourselves--sometimes in happiness, when the nabors 'ud be kind tous--and sometimes in sorrow, when there 'ud be none to help us. It'sover now, mother, and I'm lavin' you for ever!'

"Vengeance wiped his eyes--'Rouse yourself, Mick, ' said he, 'rouseyourself. '

"'Who is that sitting along with you on the stool?' said Mick. 

"'No one, ' replied his neighbor; 'but what's the matter with you, Mick?--your face is changed. '

"Mick, however, made no reply; but after a few slight struggles, inwhich he attempted to call upon his mother's name, he breathed his last. When Vengeance saw that he was dead--looked upon the cold, miserablehut in which this grateful and affectionate young man was stretched--andthen reflected on the important service he had just rendered he couldnot suppress his tears. 

"After sending down some of the females to assist his poor mother inlaying him out, Vengeance went among his friends and acquaintances, informing them of the intelligence he had received, without mentioningthe source from which he had it. After dusk that evening, they allflocked, as privately as possible, to his house, to the number of thirtyor forty, well provided with arms and ammunition. Some of them stationedthemselves in the out-houses, some behind the garden edge, and others inthe dwelling-house. "

When my brother had got thus far in his narrative, a tap came to theparlor-door, and immediately a stout-looking man, having the appearanceof a laborer, entered the room. "Well, Lachlin, " said my brother, "what's the matter?"

"Why, sir, " said Lachlin, scratching his head, "I had a bit of a favorto ax, if it would be plaisin' to you to grant it to me. "

"What is that, " said my brother. "Do you know, sir, " said he, "I haven'tbeen at a wake--let us see--this two or three years, anyhow; and, ifyou'd have no objection, why, I'd slip up awhile to Denis Kelly's; he'sa distant relation of my own, sir; and blood's thicker than wather youknow. "

"I'm just glad you came in, Lachlin, " said my brother, "I didn't thinkof you; take a chair here, and never heed the wake to-night, but sitdown and tell us about the attack on Vesey Vengeance, long ago. I'll getyou a tumbler of punch; and, instead of going to the wake to night, Iwill allow you to go to the funeral to-morrow. "

"Ah, sir, " said Lachlin, "you know whenever the punch is consarned, I'maisily persuaded; but not making little of your tumbler, sir, " said theshrewd fellow, "I would get two or three of them if I went to the wake. "

"Well, sit down, " said my brother, handing him one, "and we won't permityou to get thirsty while you're talking, at all events. "

"In troth, you haven't your heart in the likes of it, " said Lachlin. 

"Gintlemen, your healths--your health, sir, and we're happy to see youwanst more. Why, thin, I remember you, sir, when you were a gorsoon, passing to school wid your satchel on your back; but, I'll be boundyou're by no means as soople now as you were thin. Why, sir, " turning tomy brother "he could fly or kick football with the rabbits. --Well, thisis raal stuff!"

"Now, Lachlin, " said my brother, "give us an account of the attack youmade on Vesey Vengeance's house, at the Long Ridge, when all his partywere chased out of the town. "

"Why, thin, sir, I ought to be ashamed to mintion it; but you see, gintleman, there was no getting over being connected wid them; but Ihope your brother's safe, sir!"

"Oh, perfectly safe, Lachlin; you may rest assured he'll never mentionit. "

"Well, sir, " said Lachlin, addressing himself to me, "Vesey Vengeancewas--. "

"Lachlin, " said my brother, "he knows all about Vesey; just give anaccount of the attack. "

"The attack, sir! no, but the chivey we got over the mountains. Why, sir, we met in, an ould empty house, you see, that belonged to theFarrells of Ballyboulteen, that went over to America that spring. Therewar none wid us, you may be sure, but them that war up;* and in all wemight be about sixty or seventy. The Grogans, one way or another, gotit up first among them, bekase they expected Mr. Simmons would take themback when he'd find that no one else dare venther upon their land. Therewar at that time two fellows down from the county Longford, in theirneighborhood, of the name of Collier--although that wasn't their rightname--they were here upon their keeping, for the murder of a proctor intheir own part of the country. One of them was a tall, powerful fellow, with sandy hair, and red brows; the other was a slender chap, thatmust have been drawn into it by his brother--for he was very mildand innocent, and always persuaded us agin evil. The Grogans broughtlashings of whiskey, and made them that war to go foremost amostdrunk--these war the two Colliers, some of the strangers from behind themountains, and a son of Widdy Doran's, that knew every inch about theplace, for he was bred and born jist below the house a bit. He wasn'twid us, however, in regard of his brother being under board that night;but, instid of him, Tim Grogan went to show the way up the little glinto the house, though, for that matther, the most of us knew it as wellas he did; but we didn't like to be the first to put a hand to it, if wecould help it. 

 * That is, had been made members of a secret society. 

"At any rate, we sot in Farrell's empty house, drinking whiskey, tillthey war all gathered, when about two dozen of them got the damp sootfrom the chimley, and rubbed it over their faces, making them so black, that their own relations couldn't know them. We then went across thecountry in little lots, of about six or ten, or a score, and we war gladthat the wake was in Widdy Koran's, seeing that if any one would meet wewar going to it you know, and the blackening of the faces would pass fora frolic; but there was no great danger of being met for it was now longbeyant midnight. 

"Well, gintlemen, it puts me into a tremble, even at this time, to thinkof how little we cared about doing what we were bent upon. Them that hadto manage the business war more than half drunk; and, hard fortune tome! but you would think it was to a wedding they went--some of themsinging songs against the law--some of them quite merry, and laughingas if they had found a mare's nest. The big fellow, Collier, had a darklanthern wid a half-burned turf in it to light the bonfire, as theysaid; others had guns and pistols--some of them charged and some of themnot; some had bagnets, and ould rusty swords, pitchforks, and go on. Myself had nothing in my hand but the flail I was thrashing wid thatday; and to tell the thruth, the divil a step I would have gone withthem, only for fraid of my health; for, as I said awhile agone, if anydiscovery was made afterwards, them that promised to go, and turnedtail, would be marked as the informers. Neither was I so blind, butI could see that there war plenty there that would stay away if theydurst. 

"Well, we went on till we came to a little dark corner below the house, where we met and held a council of war upon what we should do. Collierand the other strangers from behind the mountains war to go first, andthe rest were to stand round the house at a distance--he carried thelanthern, a bagnet, and a horse-pistol; and half a dozen more war tobring over bottles of straw from Vengeance's own haggard, to hould upto the thatch. It's all past and gone now--but three of the Reillys weredesperate against Vesey that night, particularly one of them that hehad shot about a year and a half before--that is, peppered two of theright-hand fingers of him, one night in a scuffle, as Vesey came homefrom an Orange lodge. Well, all went on purty fair; we had got as far asthe out-houses, where we stopped, to see if we could hear any noise; butall was quiet as you plase. 

"'Now, Vengeance, ' says Reilly, swearing a terrible oath out ofhim--'you murdering Orange villain, you're going to get your pay, ' sayshe. 

"'Ay, ' says Grogan, 'what he often threatened to others he'll soon meethimself, plase God--come, boys, ' says he, 'bring the straw and light it, and just lay it up, my darlings, nicely to the thatch here, and ye'llsee what a glorious bonfire we'll have of the black Orange villain'sblankets in less than no time. '

"Some of us could hardly stand this: 'Stop, boys, ' cried one of DanSlevin's sons--'stop, Vengeance is bad enough, but his wife and childrennever offinded us--we'll not burn the place. '

"'No, ' said others, spaking out when they heard any body at all havingcourage to do so--'it's too bad, boys, to burn the place; for if we do, 'says they, 'some of the innocent may be burned before they get from thehouse, or even before they waken out of their sleep. '

"'Knock at the door first, ' says Slevin, 'and bring Vengeance out; letus cut the ears off of his head and lave him. '

"'Damn him!' says another, 'let us not take the vagabone's life; it'senough to take the ears from him, and to give him a prod or two of abagnet on the ribs; but don't kill him. '

"'Well, well, ' says Reilly, 'let us knock at the door, and get himselfand the family out, ' says he, 'and then we'll see what can be done widhim. '

"'Tattheration to me, ' says the big Longford fellow, 'if he had sarvedme, Reilly, as he did you, but I'd roast him in the flames of his ownhouse, ' says he. 

"'I'd have you to know, ' says Slevin, 'that you have no command here, Collier. I'm captain at the present time, ' says he; 'and more nor whatI wish shall not be done. Go over, ' says he to the blackfaces, 'and raphim up. '

"Accordingly they began to knock at the door, commanding Vengeance toget up and come out to them. 

"'Come, Vengeance, ' says Collier, 'put on you, my good fellow, and comeout till two or three of your neighbors, that wish you well, gets asight of your purty face, you babe of grace!'

"'Who are you that wants me at all?' says Vengeance from within. 

"'Come out, first, ' says Collier; 'a few friends that has a crow topluck with you; walk out, avourneen; or if you'd rather be roastedalive, why you may stay where you are, ' says he. 

"'Gentlemen, ' says Vengeance, 'I have never, to my knowledge, offendedany of you; and I hope you won't be so cruel as to take an industrious, hard-working man from his family, in the clouds of the night, to do himan injury. Go home, gentlemen, in the name of God, and let me and minealone. You're all mighty dacent gentlemen, you know, and I'm determinednever to make or meddle with any of you. Sure, I know right well it'spurtecting me you would be, dacent gentlemen. But I don't thinkthere's any of my neighbors there, or they wouldn't stand by and see meinjured. '

"'Thrue for you, avick, ' says they giving, at the same time; a terriblepatterrara agin the door, with two or three big stones. 

"'Stop, stop!' says Vengeance, 'don't break the door, and I'll open it. I know you're merciful, dacent gentlemen--I know your merciful. '

"So the thief came and unbarred it quietly, and the next minute abouta dozen of them that war within the house let slap at us. As God wouldhave had it, the crowd didn't happen to be forenent the door, or numbersof them would have been shot, and the night was dark, too, which was inour favor. The first volley was scarcely over, when there was anotherslap from the outhouse; and after that another from the gardens; andafter that, to be sure, we took to our scrapers. Several of them werevery badly wounded; but as for Collier, he was shot dead, and Groganwas taken prisoner, with five more, on the spot. There never was such achase as we got; and only that they thought there was more of us in it, they might have tuck most of us prisoners. 

"'Fly, boys!' says Grogan as soon as they fired out of the house--'we'vebeen sould, ' says he, 'but I'll die game, any how, '--and so he did, poorfellow; for although he and the other four war transported, one of themnever sould the pass or stagged. Not but that they might have done it, for all that, only that there was a whisper sent to them, that if theydid, a single soul belonging to one of them wouldn't be left living. TheGrogans were cousins of Denis Kelly's, that's now laid out there above. 

"From the time this tuck place till after the 'sizes, there wasn't astir among them on any side; but when that war over, the boys began toprepare. Denis, heavens be his bed, was there in his glory. This wasin the spring 'sizes, and the May fair soon followed. Ah! that was thebloody sight, I'm tould--for I wasn't at it--atween the Orangemen andthem. The Ribbonmen war bate though, but not till after there was adesperate fight on both sides. I was tould that Denis Kelly that dayknocked down five-and-twenty men in about three-quarters of an hour; andonly that long John Grimes hot him a _polthoge_ on the sconce with thebutt-end of the gun, it was thought the Orangemen would be beat. Thatblow broke his skull, and was the manes of his death. He was carriedhome senseless. "

"Well, Lachlin, " said my brother, "if you didn't see it, I did. Ihappened to be looking out of John Carson's upper window--for it wasn'taltogether safe to contemplate it within reach of the missiles. It wascertainly a dreadful and barbarous sight. You have often observed thecalm, gloomy silence that precedes a thunder-storm; and had you beenthere that day, you might have witnessed its illustration in a scenemuch more awful. The thick living mass of people extended from thecorner-house, nearly a quarter of a mile, at this end of the town, up tothe parsonage on the other side. During the early part of the day, everykind of business was carried on in a hurry and an impatience, whichdenoted the little chance they knew there would be for transacting it inthe evening. 

"Up to the hour of four o'clock the fair was unusually quiet, and, onthe whole, presented nothing in any way remarkable; but after that houryou might observe the busy stir and hum of the mass settling down intoa deep, brooding, portentous silence, that was absolutely fearful. Thefemales, with dismay and terror pictured in their faces, hurried home;and in various instances you might see mothers, and wives, and sisters, clinging about the sons, husbands, and brothers, attempting to drag themby main force from the danger which they knew impended over them. In this they seldom succeeded: for the person so urged was usuallycompelled to tear himself from them by superior strength. 

"The pedlars and basket-women, and such as had tables and standingserected in the streets, commenced removing them with all possiblehaste. The shopkeepers, and other inhabitants of the town, put uptheir shutters, in order to secure their windows from being shattered. Strangers, who were compelled to stop in town that night, took shelterin the inns and other houses of entertainment where they lodged: so thatabout five o'clock the street was completely clear, and free for action. 

"Hitherto there was not a stroke--the scene became even more silent andgloomy, although the moral darkness of their ill-suppressed passionswas strongly contrasted with the splendor of the sun, that poured downa tide of golden light upon the multitude. This contrast between thenatural brightness of the evening, and the internal gloom of theirhearts, as the beams of the sun rested upon the ever-moving crowd, would, to any man who knew the impetus with which the spirit ofreligious hatred was soon to rage among them, produce novel andsingular sensations. For, after all Toby, there is a mysteriousconnection between natural and moral things, which often invest bothnature and sentiment with a feeling that certainly would not come hometo our hearts if such a connection did not exist. A rose-tree besidea grave will lead us from sentiment to reflection; and any otherassociation, where a painful or melancholy thought is clothed with agarb of joy or pleasure, will strike us more deeply in proportion asthe contrast is strong. On seeing the sun or moon struggling through thedarkness of surrounding clouds, I confess, although you may smile, thatI feel for the moment a diminution of enjoyment--something taken, as itwere, from the sum of my happiness. 

"Ere the quarrel commenced, you might see a dark and hateful glarescowling from the countenances of the two parties, as they viewedand approached each other in the street--the eye was set in deadlyanimosity, and the face marked with an ireful paleness, occasioned atonce by revenge and apprehension. Groups were silently hurrying with aneager and energetic step to their places of rendezvous, grasping theirweapons more closely, or grinding their teeth in the impatience of theirfury. The veterans on each side were surrounded by their respectivefollowers, anxious to act under their direction; and the very boysseemed to be animated with a martial spirit, much more eager than thatof those who had greater experience in party quarrels. 

"Jem Finigan's public-house was the head-quarters and rallying-pointof the Ribbonmen; the Orangemen assembled in that of Joe Sherlock, themaster of an Orange lodge. About six o'clock the crowd in the streetbegan gradually to fall off to the opposite ends of the town--the RomanCatholics towards the north, and the Protestants towards the south. Carson's window, from which I was observing their motions, was exactlyhalf way between them, so that I had a distinct view of both. At thismoment I noticed Denis Kelly coming forward from the closely condensedmass formed by the Ribbonmen: he advanced with his cravat off, to themiddle of the vacant space between the parties, holding a fine oakcudgel in his hand. He then stopped, and addressing the Orangemen, said, "'Where's Vengeance and his crew now? Is there any single Orange villainamong you that dare come down and meet me here like a man? Is JohnGrimes there? for if he is, before we begin to take you out of a face, to hunt you altogether out of the town, ye Orange villains I would beglad that he'd step down to Denis Kelly here for two or three minutes;I'll not keep him longer. '

"There was now a stir and a murmur among the Orangemen, as if a rush wasabout to take place towards Denis; but Grimes, whom I saw endeavoring tocurb them in, left the crowd, and advanced toward him. 

"At this moment an instinctive movement among both masses took place; sothat when Grimes had come within a few yards of Kelly, both parties werewithin two or three perches of them. Kelly was standing, apparently offhis guard, with one hand thrust carelessly into the breast pocket ofhis waistcoat, and the cudgel in the other; but his eye was fixed calmlyupon Grimes as he approached. They were both powerful, fine men--brawny, vigorous, and active; Grimes had somewhat the advantage of the other inheight; he also fought with his left hand, from which circumstancehe was nicknamed Kitlhouge. He was a man of a dark, stern-lookingcountenance; and the tones of his voice were deep, sullen, and ofappalling strength. 

"As they approached each other, the windows on each side of the streetwere crowded; but there was not a breath to be heard in any direction, nor from either party. As for myself, my heart palpitated with anxiety. What they might have felt I do not know: but they must have experiencedconsiderable apprehension; for as they were both the champions of theirrespective parties, and had never before met in single encounter, theircharacters depended on the issue of the contest. 

"'Well, Grimes, ' said Denis, 'sure I've often wished for this samemeetin, ' man, betune myself and you; I have what you're goin' to get, _in_ for you this long time; but you'll get it now, avick, plase God--'

"'It was not to scould I came, you Popish, ribly rascal, ' repliedGrimes, 'but to give you what you're long--'

"Ere the word had been out of his mouth, however, Kelly sprung over tohim; and making a feint, as if he intended to lay the stick on his ribs, he swung it past without touching him and, bringing it round his ownhead like lightning, made it tell with a powerful back-stroke, right onGrimes's temple, and in an instant his own face was sprinkled with theblood which sprung from the wound. Grimes staggered forwards towards hisantagonist, seeing which, Kelly sprung back, and was again meeting himwith full force, when Grimes, turning a little, clutched Kelly's stickin his right hand, and being left-handed himself, ere the other couldwrench the cudgel from him, he gave him a terrible blow upon the backpart of the head, which laid Kelly in the dust. 

"There was then a deafening shout from the Orange party; and Grimesstood until Kelly should be in the act of rising, ready then to give himanother blow. The coolness and generalship of Kelly, however, were herevery remarkable; for, when he was just getting to his feet, 'Look atyour party coming down upon me!' he exclaimed to Grimes, who turnedround to order them back, and, in the interim, Kelly was upon his legs. 

"I was surprised at the coolness of both men; for Grimes was by no meansinflated with the boisterous triumph of his party--nor did Denis getinto a blind rage on being knocked down. They approached again, their eyes kindled into savage fury, tamed down into the wariness ofexperienced combatants; for a short time they stood eyeing each other, as if calculating upon the contingent advantages of attack or defence. This was a moment of great interest; for, as their huge and powerfulframes stood out in opposition, strung and dilated by the impulse ofpassion and the energy of contest, no judgment, however experienced, could venture to anticipate the result of the battle, or name theperson likely to be victorious. Indeed it was surprising how thenatural sagacity of these men threw their attitudes and movements intoscientific form and symmetry. Kelly raised his cudgel, and placedit transversely in the air, between himself and his opponent; Grimesinstantly placed his against it--both weapons thus forming a St. Andrew's cross--whilst the men themselves stood foot to foot, calm andcollected. Nothing could be finer than their proportions, nor superiorto their respective attitudes; their broad chests were in a line; theirthick, well-set necks laid a little back, as were their bodies, without, however, losing their balance; and their fierce but calm features, grimly but placidly scowling at each other, like men who were preparedfor the onset. 

"At length Kelly made an attempt to repeat his former feint, withvariations; for whereas he had sent the first blow to Grimes's righttemple, he took measures now to reach the left; his action was rapid, but equally quick was the eye of his antagonist, whose cudgel was up inready guard to meet the blow. It met it; and with such surprising powerwas it sent and opposed, that both cudgels, on meeting, bent acrosseach other into curves. An involuntary huzza followed this from theirrespective parties--not so much on account of the skill displayed by thecombatants as in admiration of their cudgels, and of the judgment withwhich they must have been selected. In fact, it was the staves, ratherthan the men, that were praised; and certainly the former did theirduty. In a moment their shillelaghs were across each other once more, and the men resumed their former attitudes; their savage determination, their kindled eyes, the blood which disfigured the face of Grimes, andbegrimed also the countenance of his antagonist into a deeper expressionof ferocity, occasioned many a cowardly heart to shrink from the sight. There they stood, gory and stern, ready for the next onset; it was firstmade by Grimes, who tried to practise on Kelly the feint which Kelly hadbefore practised on him. Denis, after his usual manner, caught the blowin his open hand, and clutched the staff, with an intention of holdingit until he might visit Grimes, now apparently unguarded, with alevelling blow; but Grimes's effort to wrest the cudgel from his grasp, drew all Kelly's strength to that quarter, and prevented him fromavailing himself of the other's defenceless attitude. A trial ofmuscular power ensued, and their enormous bodily strength was exhibitedin the stiff tug for victory. Kelly's address prevailed; for whileGrimes pulled against him with all his collected vigor, the formersuddenly let go his hold, and the latter, having lost his balance, staggered back; lightning could not be more quick than the action ofKelly, as, with tremendous force, his cudgel rung on the unprotectedhead of Grimes, who fell, or rather was shot to the ground, as if somesuperior power had clashed him against it; and there he lay for a shorttime, quivering under the blow he had received. 

"A peal of triumph now arose from Kelly's party; but Kelly himself, placing his arms a-kimbo, stood calmly over his enemy, awaitinghis return to the conflict. For nearly five minutes he stood in thisattitude, during which time Grimes did not stir; at length Kelly stoopeda little, and peering closely into his face, exclaimed--

"'Why, then, is it acting you are?--any how, I wouldn't put it past you, you cunning vagabone; 'tis lying to take breath he is--get up, man, I'dscorn to touch you till you're on your legs; not all as one, for sureit's yourself would show me no such forbearance. Up with you, man alive, I've none of your thrachery in me. I'll not rise my cudgel till you'reon your guard. '

"There was an expression of disdain, mingled with a glow of honest, manlygenerosity on his countenance, as he spoke, which made him at once thefavorite with such spectators as were not connected with either ofthe parties. Grimes arose, and it was evident that Kelly's generositydeepened his resentment more than the blow which had sent him so rapidlyto the ground; however, he was still cool, but his brows knit, his eyeflashed with double fierceness, and his complexion settled into a darkblue shade, which gave to his whole visage an expression fearfullyferocious. Kelly hailed this as the first appearance of passion; hisbrow expanded as the other approached, and a dash of confidence, if notof triumph, softened in some degree the sternness of his features. 

"With caution they encountered again each collected for a spring, theireyes gleaming at each other like those of tigers. Grimes made a motionas if he would have struck Kelly with his fist; and, as the latter threwup his guard against the blow, he received a stroke from Grimes's cudgelin the under part of the right arm. This had been directed at hiselbow, with an intention of rendering the arm powerless: it fell short, however, yet was sufficient to relax the grasp which Kelly had of hisweapon. Had Kelly been a novice, this stratagem alone would have soonvanquished him; his address, however, was fully equal to that of hisantagonist. The staff dropped instantly from his grasp, but a stoutthong of black polished leather, with a shining tassel at the end of it, had bound it securely to his massive wrist; the cudgel, therefore, onlydangled from his arm, and did not, as the other expected, fall to theground, or put Denis to the necessity of stooping for it--Grimes'sobject being to have struck him in that attitude. 

"A flash of indignation now shot from Kelly's eye, and with the speed oflightning he sprung within Grimes's weapon, --determined to wrest it fromhim. The grapple that ensued was gigantic. In a moment Grimes's staffwas parallel with the horizon between them, clutched in the powerfulgrasp of both. They stood exactly opposite, and rather close to eachother; their arms sometimes stretched out stiff and at full length, again contracted, until their faces, glowing and distorted by the energyof the contest, were drawn almost together. Sometimes the prevailingstrength of one would raise the staff slowly, and with graduallydeveloped power, up in a perpendicular position: again the reaction ofopposing strength would strain it back, and sway the weighty frame ofthe antagonist, crouched and set into desperate resistance, along withit; whilst the hard pebbles under their feet were crumbled into powder, and the very street itself furrowed into gravel by the shock of theiropposing strength. Indeed, so well matched a pair never met in contest:their strength, their wind, their activity, and their! natural scienceappeared to be perfectly equal. 

"At length, by a tremendous effort, Kelly got the staff twistednearly out of Grimes's hand, and a short shout, half encouraging, halfindignant, came from Grimes's party. This added shame to his otherpassions, and threw an impulse of almost superhuman strength into him:he recovered his advantage, but nothing more; they twisted--they heavedtheir great frames against each other--they struggled--their actionbecame rapid--they swayed each other this way and that--their eyes likefire--their teeth locked, and their nostrils dilated. Sometimes theytwined about each other like serpents, and twirled round with suchrapidity, that it was impossible to distinguish them--sometimes, whena pull of more than ordinary power took place, they seemed to clingtogether almost without motion, bending down until their heads nearlytouched the ground, their cracking joints seeming to stretch by theeffort, and the muscles of their limbs standing out from the flesh, strung into amazing tension. 

"In this attitude were they, when Denis, with the eye of a hawk, spieda disadvantage in Grimes's position; he wheeled round, placed his broadshoulder against the shaggy breast of the other, and giving him what iscalled an 'inside crook, ' strained him, despite of every effort, untilhe got him off his shoulder, and off the point of resistance. Therewas a cry of alarm from the windows, particularly from the females, asGrimes's huge body was swung over Kelly's shoulder, until it came downin a crash upon the hard gravel of the street, while Denis stood intriumph, with his enemy's staff in his hand. A loud huzzah followed thisfrom all present except the Orangemen, who stood bristling with fury andshame for the temporary defeat of their champion. 

"Denis again had his enemy at his mercy; but he scorned to use hisadvantage ungenerously; he went over, and placing the staff in hishands--for the other had got to his legs--retrograded to his place, anddesired Grimes to defend himself. 

"After considerable manoeuvring on both sides, Denis, who appeared tobe the more active of the two, got an open on his antagonist, and bya powerful blow upon Grimes's ear, sent him to the ground with amazingforce. I never saw such a blow given by mortal; the end of the cudgelcame exactly upon the ear, and as Grimes went down, the blood spurtedout of his mouth and nostrils; he then kicked convulsively several timesas he lay upon the ground, and that moment I really thought he wouldnever have breathed more. 

"The shout was again raised by the Ribbonmen, who threw up their hats, and bounded from the ground with the most vehement exultation. Bothparties then waited to give Grimes time to rise and renew the battle;but he appeared perfectly contented to remain where he was: for thereappeared no signs of life or motion in him. 

"'Have you got your gruel, boy?' said Kelly, going over to where helay;--'Well, you met Denis Kelly, at last, didn't you? and there youlie; but plase God, the most of your sort will soon lie in the samestate. Come, boys, ' said Kelly, addressing his own party, 'now forbloody Vengeance and his crew, that thransported the Grogans and theCaffries, and murdered Collier. Now, boys, have at the murderers, andlet us have satisfaction for all!'

"A mutual rush instantly took place; but, ere the Orangemen came down towhere Grimes lay, Kelly had taken his staff, and handed it to one of hisown party. It is impossible to describe the scene that ensued. The noiseof the blows, the shouting, the yelling, the groans, the scalped heads, and gory visages, gave both to the ear and eye an impression that couldnot easily be forgotten. The battle was obstinately maintained on bothsides for nearly an hour, and with a skill of manoeuvring, attack, andretreat, that was astonishing. 

"Both parties arranged themselves against each other, forming somethinglike two lines of battle, and these extended along the town nearly fromone end to the other. It was curious to remark the difference in thepersons and appearances of the combatants. In the Orange line the menwere taller, and of more powerful frames; but the Ribbonmen weremore hardy, active, and courageous. Man to man, notwithstanding theirsuperior bodily strength, the Orangemen could never fight the others;the former depend too much upon their fire and side-arms, but they areby no means so well trained to the use of the cudgel as their enemies. In the district where the scene of this fight is laid, the Catholicsgenerally inhabit the mountainous part of the country, to which, whenthe civil feuds of worse times prevailed, they had been driven at thepoint of the bayonet; the Protestants and Presbyterians, on the otherhand, who came in upon their possessions, occupy the richer and morefertile tracts of the land; being more wealthy, they live with lesslabor, and on better food. The characteristic features produced by thesecauses are such as might be expected--the Catholic being, like his soil, hardy, thin, and capable of bearing all weathers; and the Protestants, larger, softer, and more inactive. 

"Their advance to the first onset was far different from a factionfight. There existed a silence here, that powerfully evinced theinextinguishable animosity with which they encountered. For some timethey fought in two compact bodies, that remained unbroken so long as thechances of victory were doubtful. Men went down, and were up, and wentdown in all directions, with uncommon rapidity; and as the weightyphalanx of Orangemen stood out against the nimble line of their mountainadversaries, the intrepid spirit of the latter, and their surprisingskill and activity soon gave symptoms of a gradual superiority in theconflict. In the course of about half an hour, the Orange party began togive way in the northern end of the town; and as their opponents pressedthem warmly and with unsparing hand, the heavy mass formed by theirnumbers began to break, and this decomposition ran up their line untilin a short time they were thrown into utter confusion. They now foughtin detached parties; but these subordinate conflicts, though shorter induration than the shock of the general battle, were much more inhumanand destructive; for whenever any particular gang succeeded in puttingtheir adversaries to flight, they usually ran to the assistance of theirfriends in the nearest fight--by which means they often fought three toone. In these instances the persons inferior in numbers suffered suchbarbarities, as it would be painful to detail. 

"There lived a short distance out of the town a man nicknamed JemsyBoccagh, on account of his lameness--he was also sometimes called'Hop-an'-go-constant, ' who fell the first victim to party spirit. Hehad got arms on seeing his friends likely to be defeated, and had thehardihood to follow, with charged bayonet, a few Ribbonmen, whom heattempted to intercept, as they fled from a large number of theirenemies, who had got them separated from their comrades. Boccagh ranacross a field, in order to get before them in the road, and was in theact of climbing a ditch, when one of them, who carried a spade-shaft, struck him a blow on the head, which put an end to his existence. *

 * Fact. The person who killed him escaped to America where he got himself naturalized, and when the British government claimed him, he pleaded his privilege of being an American citizen, and he was consequently not given up. Boccagh was a very violent Orangeman, and a very offensive one. 

"This circumstance imparted, of course, fiercer hatred to bothparties, --triumph inspiring the one, a thirst for vengeance nerving theother. Kelly inflicted tremendous punishment in every direction; forscarcely a blow fell from him which did not bring a man to the ground. It absolutely resembled a military engagement, for the number ofcombatants amounted at least to four thousand men. In many places thestreet was covered with small pools and clots of blood, which flowedfrom those who lay insensible--while others were borne awaybleeding, groaning, or staggering, having been battered into a totalunconsciousness of the scene about them. 

"At length the Orangemen gave way, and their enemies, yelling withmadness and revenge, began to beat them with unrestrained fury. Theformer, finding that they could not resist the impetuous tide whichburst upon them, fled back past the church, and stopped not until theyhad reached an elevation, on which lay two or three heaps of stones, that had been collected for the purpose of paving the streets. Here theymade a stand, and commenced a vigorous discharge of them against theirpursuers. This checked the latter; and the others, seeing them hesitateand likely to retreat from the missiles, pelted them with such effect, that the tables became turned, and the Ribbonmen made a speedy flightback into the town. 

"In the meantime several Orangemen had gone into Sherlock's, where aconsiderable number of arms had been deposited, with an intention ofresorting to them in case of a defeat at the cudgels. These now cameout, and met the Ribbonmen on their flight from those who were peltingthem with the stones. A dreadful scene ensued. The Ribbonmen, who hadthe advantage in numbers, finding themselves intercepted before bythose who had arms, and pursued behind by those who had recourse to thestones, fought with uncommon bravery and desperation. Kelly, who wasfurious, but still collected and decisive, shouted out in Irish, lestthe opposite party might understand him, 'Let every two men seize uponone of those who have the arms. '

"This was attempted, and effected with partial success; and I have nodoubt but the Orangemen would have been ultimately beaten and deprivedof their weapons, were it not that many of them, who had got theirpistols out of Sherlock's, discharged them among their enemies, andwounded several. The Catholics could not stand this; but wishing toretaliate as effectually as possible, lifted stones wherever they couldfind them, and kept up the fight at a distance, as they retreated. Onboth sides, wherever a solitary foe was caught straggling from the rest, he was instantly punished with a most cruel and blood-thirsty spirit. 

"It was just about this time that I saw Kelly engaged with two men, whomhe kept at bay with great ease--retrograding, however, as he fought, towards his own party. Grimes, who had for some time before thisrecovered and joined the fight once more, was returning, after havingpursued several of the Ribbonmen past the market-house, where he spiedKelly thus engaged. With a Volunteer gun in his hand, and furious withthe degradation of his former defeat, he ran-over and struck him withthe butt-end of it upon the temple--and Denis fell. When the stroke wasgiven, an involuntary cry of 'Murder, --foul, foul!' burst from thosewho looked on from the windows; and long John Steele, Grimes'sfather-in-law, in indignation, raised his cudgel to knock him down forthis treacherous and malignant blow;--but a person out of Neal Cassidy'sback-yard hurled a round stone, about six pounds in weight, at Grimes'shead, that felled him to the earth, leaving him as insensible, andnearly in as dangerous a state as Kelly, --for his jaw was broken. 

"By this time the Catholics had retreated out of the town, and Denismight probably have received more punishment, had those who werereturning from the pursuit recognized him; but James Wilson, seeing thedangerous situation in which he lay, came out, and, with the assistanceof his servant-man, brought him into his own house. When the Orangemenhad driven their adversaries off the field, they commenced the mosthideous yellings through the streets--got music, and played partytunes--offered any money for the face of a Papist; and any of thatreligion who were so unfortunate as to make their appearance, werebeaten in the most relentless manner. It was precisely the same thing onthe part of the Ribbonmen; if a Protestant, but above all, an Orangeman, came in their way, he was sure to be treated with barbarity; for theretaliation on either side was dreadfully unjust--the innocent sufferingas well as the guilty. Leaving the window, I found Kelly in a a badstate below stairs. 

"'What's to be done?' said I to Wilson. 

"'I know not, ' replied he, 'except I put him between us on my jauntingcar, and drive him home. '

"This appeared decidedly the best plan we could adopt; so, after puttingto the horse, we placed him on the car, sitting one on each side of him, and, in this manner, left him at his own house. 

"'Did you run no risk, ' said I, 'in going among Kelly's friends, whilstthey were under the influence of party feeling and exasperated passion?'

"'No, ' said he; 'we had rendered many of them acts of kindness, andhad never exhibited any spirit but a friendly one towards them; andsuch individuals, but only such, might walk through a crowd of enragedCatholics or Protestants quite unmolested. '

"The next morning Kelly's landlord, Sir W. E------, and two magistrates, were at his house, but he lay like a log, without sense or motion. Whilst they were there, the surgeon arrived and, after examininghis head declared that the skull was fractured. During that and thefollowing day, the house was surrounded by crowds, anxious to know hisstate; and nothing might be heard amongst most of them but loud andundisguised expressions of the most ample revenge. The wife was frantic;and, on seeing me, hid her face in her hands, exclaiming. 

"'Ah, sir, I knew it would come to this; and you, too, tould him thesame thing. My curse and God's curse on it for quarrelling! Will itnever stop in the counthry till they rise some time and murdher oneanother out of the face?'

"As soon as the swelling in his head was reduced, the surgeon performedthe operation of trepanning, and thereby saved his life; but hisstrength and intellect were gone, and he just lingered for four months, a feeble, drivelling simpleton, until, in consequence of a cold, whichproduced inflammation in the brain, he died, as hundreds have diedbefore, the victim of party spirit. "

Such was the account which I heard of my old school-fellow, DenisKelly; and, indeed, when I reflected upon the nature of the education hereceived, I could not but admit that the consequences were such as mightnaturally be expected to result from it. 

The next morning a relation of Mrs. Kelly's came down to my brother, hoping that, as they wished to have as decent a funeral as possible, hewould be so kind as to attend it. 

"Musha, God knows, sir, " said the man, "it's poor Denis, heavens be hisbed! that had the regard and reverence for every one, young and ould, ofyour father's family; and it's himself that would be the proud man, ifhe was living, to see you, sir, riding after his coffin. "

"Well, " said my brother, "let Mrs. Kelly know that I shall certainlyattend, and so will my brother, here, who has come to puy me a visit. Why, I believe, Tom, you forget him!"

"Your brother, sir! Is it Master Toby, that used to cudgel the half ofthe counthry when he was at school? Gad's my life, Masther Toby (I wasnow about thirty-six), but it's your four quarters, sure enough! Arrah, thin, sir, who'd think it--you're grown so full and stout?--but, faix, you'd always the bone in you! Ah, Masther Toby!" said he, "he's lyingcowld, this morning, that would be the happy man to lay his eyes wanstmore upon you. Many an' manys the winther's evening did he spind, talking about the time when you and he were bouchals (* boys) together, and of the pranks you played at school, but especially of the time youboth leathered the four Grogans, and tuck the apples from thim--my poorfellow--and now to be stretched a corpse, lavin' his poor widdy andchildher behind him!"

I accordingly expressed my sorrow for Denis's death, which, indeed, I sincerely regretted, for he possessed materials for an excellentcharacter, had not all that was amiable and good in him been permittedto run wild. 

As soon as my trunk and traveling-bag had been brought from the inn, where I had left them the preceding night, we got our horses, and, as wewished to show particular respect to Denis's remains, rode up, withsome of our friends, to the house. When we approached, there were largecrowds of the country-people before the door of his well-thatched andrespectable-looking dwelling, which had three chimneys, and a setof sash-windows, clean and well glazed. On our arrival, I was soonrecognized and surrounded by numbers of those to whom I had formerlybeen known, who received and welcomed me with a warmth of kindness andsincerity, which it would be in vain to look for among the peasantryof any other nation. Indeed, I have uniformly observed, that when noreligious or political feeling influences the heart and principles of anIrish peasant, he is singularly sincere and faithful in his attachments, and has always a bias to the generous and the disinterested. To my ownknowledge, circumstances frequently occur, in which the ebullition ofparty spirit is, although temporary, subsiding after the cause thatproduced it has passed away, and leaving the kind peasant to thenatural, affectionate, and generous impulses of his character. Butpoor Paddy, unfortunately, is as combustible a material in politics orreligion as in fighting--thinking it his duty to take the weak side*, without any other consideration than because it is the weak side. 

 * A gentleman once told me an anecdote, of which he was an eye-witness. Some peasants, belonging to opposite factions, had met under peculiar circumstances; there were, however, two on one side, and four on the other-- in this case, there was likely to be no fight; but, in order to balance the number, one of the more numerous party joined the weak side--"bekase, boys, it would be a burnin' shame, so it would, for four to kick two; and, except I join them, by the powers, there's no chance of there being a bit of sport, or a row, at all at all!" Accordingly, he did join them, and the result of it was, that he and his party were victorious, so honestly did he fight. 

When we entered the house I was almost suffocated with the strongfumes of tobacco-smoke, snuff, and whiskey; and as I had been an oldschool-fellow of Denis's, my appearance was the signal for a generalburst of grief among his relations, in which the more distant friendsand neighbors of the deceased joined, to keep up the keening. 

I have often, indeed always, felt that there! is something extremelytouching in the Irish cry; in fact, that it breathes the very spiritof wild and natural sorrow. The Irish peasantry, whenever a deathtakes place, are exceedingly happy in seizing upon any contingentcircumstances that may occur, and making them subservient to theexcitement of grief for the departed, or the exaltation and praiseof his character and virtues. My entrance was a proof of this--I hadscarcely advanced to the middle of the floor, when my intimacy with thedeceased, our boyish sports, and even our quarrels, were adverted towith a natural eloquence and pathos, that, in spite of my firmness, occasioned me to feel the prevailing sorrow. They spoke, or chauntedmournfully, in Irish; but the substance of what they said was asfollows:--

"Oh, Denis, Denis, avourneen! you're lying low, this morning ofsorrow!--lying low are you, and does not know who it is (alluding to me)that is standing over you, weeping for the days you spent together inyour youth! It's yourself, _acushla agus asthore machree_ (the pulse andbeloved of my heart), that would stretch out the right hand warmly towelcome him to the place of his birth, where you had both been so oftenhappy about the green hills and valleys with each other! He's here now, standing over you; and it's he, of all his family, kind and respectableas they are, that was your own favorite, Denis, _avourneen dhelish!_He alone was the companion that you loved!--with no other could you behappy!--For him did you fight, when he wanted a friend in your youngquarrels! and if you had a dispute with him, were you not sorry for it?Are you not now stretched in death before him, and will he not forgiveyou?"

All this was uttered, of course, extemporaneously, and without the leastpreparation. They then passed on to an enumeration of his virtues asa father, a husband, son, and brother--specified his worth as he stoodrelated to society in general, and his kindness as a neighbor and afriend. 

An occurrence now took place which may serve, in some measure, to throwlight upon many of the atrocities and outrages which take place inIreland. Before I mention it, however, I think it necessary to makea few observations relative to it. I am convinced that those who areintimately acquainted with the Irish peasantry will grant that there isnot on the earth a class of people in whom the domestic affections ofblood-relationship are so pure, strong, and sacred. The birth of a childwill occasion a poor man to break in upon the money set apart for hislandlord, in order to keep the christening, surrounded by his friendsand neighbors, with due festivity. A marriage exhibits a spirit of joy, an exuberance of happiness and delight, to be found only in the GreenIsland; and the death of a member of a family is attended with asincerity of grief, scarcely to be expected from men so much thecreatures of the more mirthful feelings. In fact, their sorrow is asolecism in humanity--at once deep and loud--mingled up, even in itsdeepest paroxysms, with a laughter-loving spirit. It is impossible thatan Irishman, sunk in the lowest depths of affliction, could permit hisgrief to flow in all its sad solemnity, even for a day, without someglimpse of his natural humor throwing a faint and rapid light over thegloom within him. No: there is an amalgamation of sentiments in his mindwhich, as I said before, would puzzle any philosopher to account for. Yet it would be wrong to say, though his grief has something of anunsettled and ludicrous character about it, that he is incapable of themost subtle and delicate shades of sentiment, or the deepest and mostdesolating intensity of sorrow. But he laughs off those heavy vaporswhich hang about the moral constitution of the people of othernations, giving them a morbid habit, which leaves them neither strengthnor firmness to resist calamity--which they feel less keenly than anIrishman, exactly as a healthy man will feel the pangs of death withmore acuteness than one who is wasted away by debility and decay. Letany man witness an emigration, and he will satisfy himself that this istrue. I am convinced that Goldsmith's inimitable description of one inhis "Deserted Village, " was a picture drawn from actual observation. Lethim observe the emigrant, as he crosses the Atlantic, and he will find, although he joins the jest, and the laugh, and the song, that he willseek a silent corner, or a silent hour, to indulge the sorrow which hestill feels for the friends, the companions, and the native fields thathe has left behind him. This constitution of mind is beneficial: theIrishman seldom or never hangs himself, because he is capable of toomuch real feeling to permit himself to become the slave of that whichis factitious. There is no void in his affections or sentiments, which amorbid and depraved sensibility could occupy; but his feelings, of whatcharacter soever they may be, are strong, because they are fresh andhealthy. For this reason, I maintain, that when the domestic affectionscome under the influence of either grief or joy, the peasantry of nonation are capable of feeling so deeply. Even on the ordinary occasionsof death, sorrow, though it alternates with mirth and cheerfulness, ina manner peculiar to themselves, lingers long in the unseen recessesof domestic life: any hand, therefore, whether by law or violence, thatplants a wound here, will suffer to the death. 

When my brother and I entered the house, the body had just been putinto the coffin and it is usual after this takes place, and before itis nailed down, for the immediate relatives of the family to embrace thedeceased, and take their last look and farewell of his remains. In thepresent instance, the children were brought over, one by one, to performthat trying and melancholy ceremony. The first was an infant on thebreast, whose little innocent mouth was held down to that of its deadfather; the babe smiled upon his still and solemn features, and wouldhave played with his grave-clothes, but that the murmur of unfeignedsorrow, which burst from all present, occasioned it to be removed. Thenext was a fine little girl, of three or lour years, who inquired wherethey were going to bring her daddy, and asked if he would not soon comeback to her. 

"My daddy's sleeping a long time, " said the child, "but I'll waken himtill he sings me 'Peggy Slevin. ' I like my daddy best, bekase I sleepwid him--and he brings me good things from the fair; he bought me thisribbon, " said she, pointing to a ribbon which he had purchased for her. 

The rest of the children were sensible of their loss, and truly it wasa distressing scene. His eldest son and daughter, the former aboutfourteen, the latter about two years older, lay on the coffin, kissinghis lips, and were with difficulty torn away from it. 

"Oh!" said the boy, "he is going from us, and night or day we will neversee him or hear him more! Oh! father--father--is that the last sight weare ever to see of your face? Why, father dear, did you die, and leaveus forever?--forever--wasn't your heart good to us, and your words kindto us--Oh! your last smile is smiled--your last kiss given--and yourlast kind word spoken to your children that you loved, and that lovedyou as we did. Father, core of my heart, are you gone forever, and yourvoice departed? Oh! the murdherers, oh! the murdherers, the murdherers!"he exclaimed, "that killed my father; for only for them, he would bestill wid us: but, by the God that's over me, if I live, night or day Iwill not rest, till I have blood for blood; nor do I care who hears it, nor if I was hanged the next minute. "

As these words escaped him, a deep and awful murmur of suppressedvengeance burst from his relations. At length their sorrow becametoo strong to be repressed; and as it was the time to take their lastembrace and look of him, they came up, and after fixing their eyeson his face in deep affliction, their lips began to quiver, and theircountenances became convulsed. They then burst out simultaneously into atide of violent grief, which, after having indulged in it for some time, they checked. But the resolution of revenge was stronger than theirgrief, for, standing over his dead body, they repeated, almost word forword, the vow of vengeance which the son had just sworn. It was reallya scene dreadfully and terribly solemn; and I could not avoid reflectingupon the mystery of nature, which can, from the deep power of domesticaffection, cause to spring a determination to crime of so black adye. Would to God that our peasantry had a clearer sense of moral andreligious duties, and were not left so much as they are to the headlongimpulse of an ardent temperament and an impetuous character; and wouldto God that the clergy who superintend their morals, had a betterknowledge of human nature, and a more liberal education!

During all this time the heart-broken widow sat beyond the coffin, looking upon what passed with a stupid sense of bereavement; and whenthey had all performed this last ceremony, it was found necessary totell her that the time was come for the procession of the funeral, andthey only waited for; her to take, as the rest did, her last look andembrace of her husband. When she heard this, it pierced her like anarrow; she became instantly collected, and her complexion assumed a darkshade of despairing anguish, which it was an affliction even to lookupon, one then stooped over the coffin, and kissed him several times, after which she ceased sobbing, and lay silently with her mouth to his. 

The character of a faithful wife sorrowing for a beloved husband hasthat in it which compels both respect and sympathy. There was not atthis moment a dry eye in the house. She still lay silent on the coffin;but, as I observed that her bosom seemed not to heave as it did a littlebefore, I was convinced that she had become insensible. I accordinglybeckoned to Kelly's brother, to whom I mentioned what I had suspected;and on his going over to ascertain the truth, he found her as Ihad said. She was then brought to the air, and after sometrouble--recovered; but I recommended them to put her to bed, and not tosubject her to any unnecessary anguish, by a custom which was reallytoo soul-piercing to endure. This, however, was, in her opinion, theviolation of an old rite, sacred to her heart and affections--she wouldnot hear of it for an instant. Again she was helped out between herbrother and brother-in-law; and, after stooping down, and doing as theothers had done--

"Now, " said she, "I will sit here, and keep him under my eye as long asI can--surely you won't blame me for it; you all know the kind husbandhe was to me, and the good right I have to be sorry for him! Oh!" sheadded, "is it thrue at all?--is he, my own Denis, the young husband ofmy early--and my first love, in good airnest, dead, and going to leaveme here--me, Denis, that you loved so tindherly, and our childher, thatyour brow was never clouded aginst? Can I believe myself or is it adhrame? Denis, _avick machree! avick machree!_* your hand was dreaded, and a good right it had, for it was the manly hand, that was ever andalways raised in defence of them that wanted a friend; abroad, inthe faction-fight, against the oppressor, your name was ever feared, acushla?--but at home--at home--where was your fellow Denis, agrah, doyou know the lips that's spaking to you?--your young bride--your heart'slight--Oh! I remimber the day you war married to me like yesterday. Oh!avourneen, then and since wasn't the heart of your own Honor bound upin you--yet not a word even to me. Well, agrah, machree, 'tisn't yourfault, it's the first time you ever refused to spake to your own Honor. But you're dead, avourneen, or it wouldn't be so--you're dead before myeyes--husband of my heart, and all my hopes and happiness goes into thecoffin and the grave along wid you, forever!"

 * Son of my heart! Son of my heart!

All this time she was rocking herself from side to side, her complexionpale and ghastly as could be conceived, and the tears streaming from hereyes. When the coffin was about to be closed, she retired until it wasnailed down, after which she returned with her bonnet and cloak on her, ready to accompany it to the grave. I was astonished--for I thoughtshe could not have walked two steps without assistance; but it was thecustom, and to neglect it, I found, would have thrown the imputationof insincerity upon her grief. While they were preparing to bring thecoffin out, I could hear the chat and conversation of those who werestanding in crowds before the door, and occasionally a loud, vacantlaugh, and sometimes a volley of them, responsive to the jokes of somerustic wit, probably the same person who acted master of the revels atthe wake. 

Before the coffin was finally closed, Ned Corrigan, whom I had put toflight the preceding night, came up, and repeated the De Profundis, invery strange Latin, over the corpse. When this was finished, he got ajug of holy water, and after dipping his thumb in it, first made thesign of the cross upon his own forehead, and afterwards sprinkled itupon all present, giving my brother and myself an extra compliment, supposing, probably, that we stood most in need, of it. When thiswas over, he sprinkled the corpse and the coffin in particular mostprofusely. He then placed two pebbles from Lough Derg* and a bit of holycandle, upon the breast of the corpse, and having said a Pater and Ave, in which he was joined by the people, he closed the lid and nailed itdown. 

 * Those who make a station at Lough Derg are in the habit of bringing home some of its pebbles, which are considered to be sacred and possessed of many virtues. 

"Ned, " said his brother, "are his feet and toes loose?"

"Musha, but that's more than myself knows, " replied Ned--"Are they, Katty?" said he, inquiring from the sister of the deceased. 

"Arrah, to be sure, avourneen!" answered Katty--"do you think we wouldlave him to be tied that way, when he'd be risin' out of his last bed atthe day of judgment? Wouldn't it be too bad to have his toes tied thin, avourneen?"

The coffin was then brought out and placed upon four chairs before thedoor, to be keened; and, in the mean time, the friends and well-wishersof the deceased were brought into the room to get each a glass ofwhiskey, as a token of respect. I observed also, that such as had notseen any of Kelly's relations until then, came up, and shakinghands with them, said--"I'm sorry for your loss!" This expression ofcondolence was uniform, and the usual reply was, "Thank you, Mat, orJim!" with a pluck of the skirt, accompanied by a significant nod, tofollow. They then got a due share of whiskey; and it was curious, afterthey came out, their faces a little flushed, and their eyes watery withthe strong, ardent spirits, to hear with what heartiness and alacritythey entered into Denis's praises. 

When he had been keened in the street, there being no hoarse, the coffinwas placed upon two handspikes, which were fixed across, but parallelto each other under it. These were borne by four men, one at the end ofeach, with the point of it crossing his body a little below his stomach;in other parts of Ireland, the coffin is borne upon a bier on theshoulders, but this is more convenient and less distressing. 

When we got out upon the road, the funeral was of great extent--forKelly had been highly respected. On arriving at the merin which boundedthe land he had owned, the coffin was laid down, and a loud and wailingkeene took place over it. It was again raised, and the funeral proceededin a direction which I was surprised to see it take, and it was notuntil an acquaintance of my brother's had explained the matter that Iunderstood the cause of it. In Ireland when a murder is perpetrated, itis sometimes usual, as the funeral proceeds to the grave-yard, to bringthe corpse to the house of him who committed the crime, and lay it downat his door, while the relations of the deceased kneel down, and, withan appaling solemnity, utter the deepest, imprecations, and invokethe justice of heaven on the head of the murderer. This, however, isgenerally omitted if the residence of the criminal be completely outof the line of the funeral, but if it be possible, by any circuit, toapproach it, this dark ceremony is never omitted. In cases where thecrime is doubtful, or unjustly imputed, those who are thus visitedcome out, and laying their right hand upon the coffin, protest theirinnocence of the blood of the deceased, calling God to witness the truthof their asseverations; but, in cases where the crime is clearly provedagainst the murderer, the door is either closed, the ceremony repelledby violence, or the house abandoned by the inmates until the funeralpasses. *

 * Many of these striking and startling old customs have nearly disappeared, and indeed it is better that they should. 

The death of Kelly, however, could not be actually, or, at least, directly considered a murder, for it was probable that Grimes didnot inflict the stroke with an intention to take away his life, and, besides, Kelly survived it four months. Grimes's house was not morethan fifteen perches from the road: and when the corpse was opposite thelittle bridleway that led up to it, they laid it down for a moment, andthe relations of Kelly surrounded it, offering up a short prayer, withuncovered heads. It was then borne toward the house, whilst the keeningcommenced in a loud and wailing cry, accompanied with clapping of hands, and every other symptom of external sorrow. But, independent of theircompliance with this ceremony, as an old usage, there is little doubtthat the appearance of anything connected with the man who certainlyoccasioned Kelly's death, awoke a keener and more intense sorrow for hisloss. The wailing was thus continued until the coffin was laid oppositeGhimes's door; nor did it cease then, but, on the contrary, was renewedwith louder and more bitter lamentations. 

As the multitude stood compassionating the affliction of the widow andorphans, it was the most impressive and solemn spectacle that could bewitnessed. The very house seemed to have a condemned look; and, as asingle wintry breeze waved a tuft of long grass that grew on a seatof turf at the side of the door, it brought the vanity of human enmitybefore my mind with melancholy force. When the keening ceased, Kelly'swife, with her children, knelt, their faces towards the house of theirenemy, and invoked, in the strong language of excited passion, thejustice of heaven upon the head of the man who had left her a widow, andher children fatherless. I was anxious to know if Grimes would appearto disclaim the intention of murder; but I understood that he was atmarket--for it happened to be market-day. 

"Come out!" said the widow--"come out, and look at the sight that'shere before you! Come and view your own work! Lay but your hand upon thecoffin, and the blood of him you murdhered will spout, before God andthese Christian people, in your guilty face! But, oh! may the AlmightyGod bring this home to you!--May you never lave this life, John Grimes, till worse nor has overtaken me and mine fall upon you and yours! Mayour curse light upon you this day!--the curse, I say, of the widow andthe orphans, that your bloody hand has made us, may it blast you! Mayyou, and all belonging to you wither off of the 'airth! Night and day, sleeping and waking--like snow off the ditch, may you melt, until yourname and your place be disremimbered, except to be cursed by themthat will hear of you and your hand of murdher! Amin, we pray God thisday!--and the widow and orphans' prayer will not fall to the groundwhile your guilty head is above it! Childhre, do you all say it?"

At this moment a deep, terrific murmur, or rather ejaculation, corroborative of assent to this dreadful imprecation, pervaded the crowdin a fearful manner; their countenances darkened, their eyes gleamed, and their scowling visages stiffened into an expression of determinedvengeance. 

When these awful words were uttered, Grimes's wife and daughtersapproached the window in tears, sobbing, at the same time, loudly andbitterly. 

"You're wrong, " said the wife--"you're wrong, Widow Kelly, in sayingthat my husband murdhered him:--he did not murdher him; for when youand yours were far from him, I heard John Grimes declare before the Godwho's to judge him, that he had no thought or intention of taking hislife; he struck him in anger, and the blow did him an injury that wasnot intended. Don't curse him, Honor Kelly, " said she, "don't curse himso fearfully; but, above all, don't curse me and my innocent childher, for we never harmed you, nor wished you ill! But it was this partywork did it! Oh, my God!" she exclaimed, wringing her hands in utterbitterness of spirit, "when will it be ended between friends andneighbors, that ought to live in love and kindness together instead offighting in this bloodthirsty manner!"

She then wept more violently, as did her daughters. 

"May God give me mercy in the last day, Mrs. Kelly, as I pity from myheart and soul you and your orphans, " she continued; "but don't curseus, for the love of God--for you know we should forgive our enemies, aswe ourselves, that are the enemies of God, hope to be forgiven. "

"May God forgive me, then, if I have wronged you or your husband, " saidthe widow, softened by their distress; "but you know, that whether heintended his life or not, the stroke he gave him has left my childherwithout a father, and myself dissolate. Oh, heavens above me!" sheexclaimed, in a scream of distraction and despair, "is it possible--isit thrue--that my manly husband--the best father that ever breathed thebreath of life--my own Denis, is lying dead--murdhered before my eyes?Put your hands on my head, some of you--put your hands on my head, orit will go to pieces. Where are you, Denis--where are you, the strongof hand, and the tender of heart? Come to me, darling, I want you inmy distress. I want comfort, Denis; and I'll take it from none butyourself, for kind was your word to me in all my afflictions!"

All present were affected; and, indeed, it was difficult to say, whetherKelly's wife or Grimes's was more to be pitied at the moment. Theaffliction of the latter and of her daughters was really pitiable; theirsobs were loud, and the tears streamed down their cheeks like rain. Whenthe widow's exclamations had ceased, or rather were lost in the loudcry of sorrow which were uttered by the keeners and friends of thedeceased--they, too, standing somewhat apart from the rest, joined in itbitterly; and the solitary wail of Mrs. Grimes, differing in characterfrom that of those who had been trained to modulate the most profoundgrief into strains of a melancholy nature, was particularly wildand impressive. At all events, her Christian demeanor, joined to thesincerity of her grief, appeased the enmity of many; so true is it thata soft answer turneth away wrath. I could perceive, however, that theresentment of Kelly's male relations did not appear to be in any degreemoderated. 

The funeral again proceeded, and I remarked that whenever a strangepassenger happened to meet it, he always turned back, and accompaniedit for a short distance, after which he resumed his journey, it beingconsidered unlucky to omit this visage on meeting a funeral. Denis'sresidence was not more than two miles from the churchyard, which wassituated in the town where he had received the fatal blow. As soon as wehad got on about the half of this way, the priest of the parish metus, and the funeral, after proceeding a few perches more, turned into agreen field, in the corner of which stood a table with the apparatus forsaying mass spread upon it. 

The coffin was then laid down once more, immediately before thistemporary altar; and the priest, after having robed himself, the wrongor the sable side of the vestments out, as is usual in the case ofdeath, began to celebrate mass for the dead, the congregation allkneeling. When this was finished, the friends of the deceased approachedthe altar, and after some private conversation, the priest turned round, and inquired aloud--

"Who will give Offerings?"

The people were acquainted with the manner in which this matter isconducted, and accordingly knew what to do. When the priest put thequestion, Denis's brother, who Was a wealthy man, came forward, and laiddown two guineas on the altar; the priest took this up, and putting iton a plate, set out among the multitude, accompanied by two or three ofthose who were best acquainted with the inhabitants of the parish. Hethus continued putting the question, distinctly, after each man hadpaid; and according as the money was laid down, those who accompaniedthe priest pronounced the name of the person who gave it, so that allpresent might hear it. This is also done to enable the friends of thedeceased to know not only those who show them this mark of respect, but those who neglect it, in order that they may treat them in the samemanner on similar occasions. The amount of money so received is verygreat; for there is a kind of emulation among the people, as to who willact with most decency and spirit, that is exceedingly beneficial tothe priest. In such instances the difference of religion is judiciouslyoverlooked; for although the prayers of Protestants are declined onthose occasions, yet it seems the same objection does not hold goodagainst their money, and accordingly they pay as well as the rest. Whenthe priest came round to where I stood, he shook hands with my brother, with whom he appeared to be on very friendly and familiar terms; he andI were then introduced to each other. 

"Come, " said he, with a very droll expression of countenance, shakingthe plate at the same time up near my brother's nose, --"Come, Mr. D'Arcy, down with your offerings, if you wish to have a friend with St. Peter when you go as far as the gates; down with your money, sir, andyou shall be remembered, depend upon it. "

"Ah, " said my brother, pulling out a guinea, "I would with the greatestpleasure; but I fear this guinea is not orthodox. I'm afraid it has aheretical mark upon it. "

"In that case, " replied his Reverence laughing heartily, "your only planis to return it to the bosom of the church, by laying it on the platehere--it will then be within the pale, you know. "

This reply produced a great deal of good-humor among that part of thecrowd which immediately surrounded them--not excepting his nearestrelations, who laughed heartily--

"Well, " said my brother, as he laid it on the plate, "how many prayerswill you offer up in my favor for this?"

"Leave that to myself, " said his Reverence, looking at the money; "itwill be before you, I say, when you go to St. Peter. "

He then held the plate over to me in a droll manner; and I added anotherguinea to my brother's gift; for which I had the satisfaction of havingmy name called out so loud, that it might be heard a quarter of a mileoff. 

"God bless you, sir, " said the priest, "and I thank you. "

"John, " said I, when he left us, "I think that is a pleasant and rathera sensible man?"

"He's as jovial a soul, " replied my brother, "as ever gave birth to ajest, and he sings a right good song. Many a convivial hour have he andI spent together; and a more hospitable man besides, never yet existed. Although firmly attached to his own religion, he is no bigot; but, onthe contrary, an excellent, liberal, and benevolent man. "

When the offerings were all collected, he returned to the altar, repeated a few additional prayers in prime style--as rapid as lightning;and after hastily shaking the holy water on the crowd, the funeralmoved oh. It was now two o'clock, the day clear and frosty, and the sununusually bright for the season. During mass, many were added to thosewho formed the funeral train at the outset; so that, when we got outupon the road, the procession appeared very large. After this, few ornone joined it; for it is esteemed by no means "dacent" to do so aftermass, because, in that case, the matter is ascribed to an evasion of theofferings; but those whose delay has not really been occasioned by thismotive, make it a point to pay them at the grave-yard, or after theinterment, and sometimes even on the following day--so jealous arethe peasantry of having any degrading suspicion attached to theirgenerosity. 

The order of the funeral now was as follows:--Foremost the women--nextto them the corpse, surrounded by the relations--the eldest son, in deepaffliction, "led the coffin, " as chief mourner, holding in his hand thecorner of a sheet or piece of linen, fastened to the mort-cloth, calledmoor-cloth. After the coffin came those who were on foot, and in therear were the equestrians. When we were a quarter of a mile from thechurchyard, the funeral was met by a dozen of singing-boys, belonging toa chapel choir, which the priest, who was fond of music, had some timebefore formed. They fell in, two by two, immediately behind the corpse, and commenced singing the Requiem, or Latin hymn for the dead. 

The scene through which we passed at this time, though not clothed withthe verdure and luxuriant beauty of summer, was, nevertheless, markedby that solemn and decaying splendor which characterizes a finecountry, lit up by the melancholy light of a winter setting sun. It was, therefore, much more in character with the occasion. Indeed--I felt italtogether beautiful; and, as the "dying day-hymn stole aloft, " thedim sunbeams fell, through a vista of naked, motionless trees, uponthe coffin, which was borne with a slower and more funereal pace thanbefore, in a manner that threw a solemn and visionary light upon thewhole procession, this, however, was raised to something dreadfullyimpressive, when the long train, thus proceeding with a motion somournful, as seen, each, or at least the majority of them, coveredwith a profusion of crimson ribbons, to indicate that the corpse theybore--owed, his death to a deed of murder. The circumstance of the sunglancing his rays upon the coffin was not unobserved by the peasantry, who considered it as a good omen to the spirit of the departed. 

As we went up the street which had been the scene of the quarrel thatproved so fatal to Kelly, the coffin was again laid down on the spotwhere he received his death-blow; and, as was usual, the wild andmelancholy keene was raised. My brother saw many of Grimes's friendsamong the spectators, but he himself was not visible. Whether Kelly'sparty saw then or not, we could not say; if they did, they seemed not tonotice them, for no expression of revenge or indignation escaped them. 

At length we entered the last receptacle of the dead. The coffin was nowplaced upon the shoulders of the son and brothers of the deceased, andborne round the church-yard; whilst the priest, with his stole upon him, preceded it, reading prayers for the eternal repose of the soul. Beingthen laid beside the grave, a "De profundis" was repeated by the priestand the mass-server; after which a portion of fresh clay, carried fromthe fields, was brought to his Reverence, who read a prayer over it, and consecrated it. This is a ceremony which is never omitted at theinterment of a Roman Catholic. When it was over, the coffin was laidinto the grave, and the blessed clay shaken over it. The priest nowtook the shovel in his own hands, and threw in the three firstshovelfuls--one in the name of the Father, one in the name of the Son, and one in the name of the Holy Ghost. The sexton then took it, and in ashort time Denis Kelly was fixed for ever in his narrow bed. 

While these ceremonies were going forward, the churchyard presented acharacteristic picture. Beside the usual groups who straggle through theplace, to amuse themselves by reading the inscriptions on the tombs, you might see many individuals kneeling on particular graves, wheresome relation lay--for the benefit of whose soul they offered up theirprayers with an attachment and devotion which one cannot but admire. Sometimes all the surviving members of the family would assemble, andrepeat a Rosary for the same purpose. Again, you might see an unhappywoman beside a newly-made grave, giving way to lamentation and sorrowfor the loss of a husband, or of some beloved child. Here, you mightobserve the "last bed" ornamented with hoops, decked in white paper, emblematic of the virgin innocence of the individual who sleptbelow;--there, a little board-cross informing you that "this monumentwas erected by a disconsolate husband to the memory of his belovedwife. " But that which excited greatest curiosity was a sycamore-tree, which grow in the middle of the burying-ground. 

It is necessary to inform the reader, that in Ireland many of thechurch-yards are exclusively appropriated to the interment of RomanCatholics, and, consequently, the corpse of no one who had been aProtestant would be permitted to pollute or desecrate them. This wasone of them: but it appears that by some means or other, the body of aProtestant had been interred in it--and hear the consequence! The nextmorning heaven marked its disapprobation of this awful visitation by amiracle; for, ere the sun rose from the east, a full-grown sycamorehad shot up out of the heretical grave, and stands there to this day, a monument at once of the profanation and its consequence. Crowds worelooking at this tree, feeling a kind of awe, mingled with wonder, atthe deed which drew down such a visible and lasting mark of God'sdispleasure. On the tombstones near Kelly's grave, men and women wereseated, smoking tobacco to their very heart's content; for, with thatprofusion which characterizes the Irish in everything, they had broughtout large quantities of tobacco, whiskey, and bunches of pipes. On suchoccasions it is the custom for those who attend the wake or the funeralto bring a full pipe home with them; and it is expected that, as oftenas it is used, they will remember to say "God be merciful to the soul ofhim that this pipe was over. "

The crowd, however, now began to disperse; and the immediate friends ofthe deceased sent the priest, accompanied by Kelly's brother, to requestthat we would come in, as the last mark of respect to poor Denis'smemory, and take a glass of wine and a cake. 

"Come, Toby, " said my brother, "we may as well go in, as it will gratifythem; we need not make much delay, and we will still be at home insufficient time for dinner. "

"Certainly you will, " said the Priest; "for you shall both come and dinewith me to-day. "

"With all my heart, " said my brother; "I have no objection, for I knowyou give it good. "

When we went in, the punch was already reeking from immense white jugs, that couldn't hold less than a gallon each. 

"Now, " said his Reverence, very properly, 'you have had a decent andcreditable funeral, and have managed every thing with great propriety;let me request, therefore, that you will not get drunk, nor permityourselves to enter into any disputes or quarrels; but be moderate inwhat you take, and go home peaceably. "

"Why, thin, your Reverence, " replied the widow, "he's now in his grave, and, thank God, it's he that had the dacent funeral all out--ten goodgallons did we put over you, asthore, and it's yourself that liked thedacent thing, any how--but sure, sir, it would shame him where he'slyin', if we disregarded him so far as to go home widout bringing in ourfriends, that didn't desart us in our throuble, an' thratin' them fortheir kindness. "

While Kelly's brother was filling out all their glasses, the priest, mybrother, and I, were taking a little refreshment. When the glasses werefilled, the deceased's brother raised his in his hand, and said, --

"Well, gintlemen, " addressing us, "I hope you'll pardon me for notdhrinking your healths first; but people, you know, can't break throughan ould custom, at any rate--so I give poor Denis's health that's in hiswarm grave, and God be merciful to his sowl. "

The priest now winked at me to give them their own way; so we filled ourglasses, and joined the rest in drinking "Poor Denis's health, that'snow in his warm grave, and God be merciful to his soul. "

When this was finished, they then drank ours, and thanked us for ourkindness in attending the funeral. It was now past five o'clock; and weleft them just setting into a hard bout of drinking, and rode down tohis Reverence's residence. 

"I saw you smile, " said he, on our way, "at the blundering toast of MatKelly; but it would be labor in vain to attempt setting them right. Whatdo they know about the distinctions of more refined life? Besides, Imaintain, that what they said was as well calculated to express theiraffection, as if they had drunk honest Denis's memory. It is, at least, unsophisticated. But did you hear, " said he, "of the apparition that wasseen last night, on the mountain road above Denis's?"

"I did not hear of it, " I replied, equivocating a little. 

"Why, " said he, "it is currently reported that the spirit of a murderedpedlar, which haunts the hollow of the road at Drumfurrar bridge, chasedaway the two servant men as they were bringing home the coffin, and thatfinding it a good fit, he got into it, and walked half a mile along theroad, with the wooden surtout upon him; and, finally, that to windup the frolic, he left it on one end half-way between the bridge andDenis's house, after putting a crowd of the countrymen to flight. Isuspect some droll knave has played them a trick. I assure you, that adeputation of them, who declared that they saw the coffin move along ofitself, waited upon me this morning, to know whether they ought to haveput him into the coffin, or gotten another. "

"Well, " said my brother, in reply to him, "after dinner we will probablythrow some light upon that circumstance; for I believe my brother hereknows something about it. "

"So, sir, " said the priest, "I perceive you have been amusing yourselfat their expense. "

I seldom spent a pleasanter evening than, I did with Father Miloy (sohe was called), who was, as my brother said, a shrewd, sensible man, possessed of convivial powers of the first order. He sang us severalgood songs; and, to do him justice, he had an excellent voice. Heregretted very much the state of party and religious feeling, which hedid every thing in his power to suppress. "But, " said he, "I have littleco-operation in my efforts to communicate knowledge to my flock, andimplant better feelings among them. You must know, " he added, "that Iam no great favorite with them. On being appointed to this parish by mybishop, I found that the young man who was curate to my predecessor hadformed a party against me, thinking, by that means, eventually to getthe parish himself. Accordingly, on coming here, I found the chapeldoors closed on me: so that a single individual among them would notrecognize me as their proper pastor. By firmness and spirit, however, Iat length succeeded, after a long struggle against the influence ofthe curate, in gaining admission to the altar; and, by a properrepresentation of his conduct to the bishop, I soon made my gentlemanknock under. Although beginning to gain ground in the good opinion ofthe people, I am by no means yet a favorite. This curate and I scarcelyspeak; but I hope that in the course of time, both he and they willbegin to find, that by kindness and a sincere love for their welfare onmy part, good-will and affection will ultimately be established amongus. At least, there shall be nothing left undone, so far as I amconcerned, to effect it. "

It was now near nine o'clock, and my brother was beginning to relate ananecdote concerning the clergyman who had preceded Father Molloy in theparish, when a messenger from Mr. Wilson, already alluded to, came up inbreathless haste, requesting the priest, for God's sake, to go down intotown instantly, as the Kellys and the Grimeses were engaged in a freshquarrel. 

"My God!" he exclaimed--"when will this work have an end? But, to tellyou the truth, gentlemen, I apprehended it; and I fear that somethingstill more fatal to the parties will yet be the consequence. Mr. D'Arcy, you must try what you can do with the Grimeses, and I will manage theKellys. "

We then proceeded to the town, which was but a very short distance fromthe Priest's house; and, on arriving, found a large crowd before thedoor of the house in which the Kellys had been drinking, engaged in hardconflict. The priest was on foot, and had brought his whip with him, itbeing an argument, in the hands of a Roman Catholic pastor, which tellsso home that it is seldom gainsaid. Mr. Molloy and my brother now dashedin amongst them: and by remonstrance, abuse, blows, and entreaty, theywith difficulty succeeded in terminating the fight. They were alsoassisted by Mr. Wilson and other persons, who dared not, until theirappearance, run the risk of interfering between them. Wilson's servant, who had come for the priest, was still standing beside me, looking on;and, while my brother and Mr. Molloy were separating the parties, Iasked him how the fray commenced. 

"Why, sir, " said he, "it bein' market-day, the Grimeses chanced to bein town, and this came to the ears of the Kellys, who were drinking inCassidy's here, till they got tipsy; some of them then broke out, and began to go up and down the street, shouting for the face ofa murdhering Grimes. The Grimeses, sir, happened at the time to bedrinking with a parcel of their friends in Joe Sherlock's, and hearingthe Kellys calling out for them, why, as the dhrop, sir, was in on bothsides, they were soon at it. Grimes has given one of the Kelly's a greatbating; but Tom Grogan, Kelly's cousin, a little before we came down, I'm tould, has knocked the seven senses out of him, with the pelt of abrick-bat in the stomach. "

Soon after this, however, the quarrel was got under; and, in order toprevent any more bloodshed that night, my brother and I got the Kellystogether, and brought them as far as our residence, on their way home. As they went along, they uttered awful vows, and determinations of thedeepest revenge, swearing repeatedly that they would shoot Grimes frombehind a ditch, if they could not in any other manner have his blood. They seemed highly intoxicated; and several of them were cut and abusedin a dreadful manner; even the women were in such a state of excitementand alarm, that grief for the deceased was, in many instances, forgotten. Several of both sexes were singing; some laughing withtriumph at the punishment they had inflicted on the enemy; others ofthem, softened by what they had drunk, were weeping in tones of sorrowthat might be heard a couple of miles off. Among the latter were manyof the men, some of whom, as they staggered along, with their friezebig coats hanging off one shoulder, clapped their hands, and roaredlike bulls, as if they intended, by the loudness of their grief then, tocompensate for their silence when sober. It was also quite ludicrous tosee the men kissing each other, sometimes in this maudlin sorrow, and atothers when exalted into the very madness of mirth. Such as had beencut in the scuffle, on finding the blood trickle down their faces, wouldwipe it off--then look at it, and break out into a parenthetical volleyof curses against the Grimeses; after which, they would resume theirgrief, hug each other in mutual sorrow, and clap their hands as before. In short, such a group could be seen nowhere but in Ireland. 

When my brother and I had separated from them, I asked him what hadbecome of Vengeance, and if he were still in the country. 

"No, " said he; "with all his courage and watchfulness, he found thathis life was not safe; he, accordingly, sold off his property, andcollecting all his ready cash, emigrated to America, where, I hear, heis doing well. "

"God knows, " I replied, "I shouldn't be surprised if one-half of thepopulation were to follow his example, for the state of society here, among the lower orders, is truly deplorable. "

"Ay, but you are to consider now, " he replied, "that you have beenlooking at the worst of it. If you pass an unfavorable opinion uponour countrymen when in the public house or the quarrel, you ought toremember what they are under their own roofs, and in all the relationsof private life. "

The "Party Fight, " described in the foregoing sketch, is unhappily nofiction, and it is certain that there are thousands still alive whohave good reason to remember it. Such a fight, or I should rather saybattle--for such in fact it was--did not take place in a state of civilsociety, if I can say so, within the last half century in this country. The preparations for it were secretly being made for two or three monthsprevious to its occurrence, and however it came to light, it so happenedthat each party became cognizant of the designs of the other. Thistremendous conflict, of which I was an eye-witness, --being then butabout twelve years of age--took place in the town, or rather city, ofClogher, in my native county of Tyrone. The reader may form an opinionof the bitterness and ferocity with which it was fought on bothsides when he is informed that the Orangemen on the one side, and theRibbonmen on the other, had called in aid from the surrounding countiesof Monaghan, Cavan, Fermanagh, and Derry; and, if I mistake not, alsofrom Louth. In numbers, the belligerents could not have been less thanfrom four to five thousand men. The fair day on which it occurred isknown simply as "the Day of the great Fight. "

THE LOUGH DERG PILGRIM. 

In describing the habits, superstitions, and feelings of the Irishpeople, it would be impossible to overlook a place which occupiesso prominent a position in their religious usages as the celebratedPurgatory of St. Patrick, situated in a lake that lies among the bleakand desolate looking mountains of Donegal. 

It may also be necessary to state to the reader, that the followingsketch, though appearing in this place, was the first production from mypen which ever came before the public. The occasion of its being writtenwas this:--I had been asked to breakfast by the late Rev. Caesar Otway, some time I think in the winter of 1829. About that time, or a littlebefore, he had brought out his admirable work called, "Sketches inIreland, descriptive of interesting portions of Donegal, Cork, andKerry. " Among the remarkable localities of Donegal, of course it wasnatural to suppose, that "_Lough Derg_, " or the celebrated "_Purgatoryof St. Patrick_, " would not be omitted. Neither was it; and nothingcan exceed the accuracy and truthful vigor with which he describes itssituation and appearance. In the course of conversation, however, Idiscovered that he had never been present during the season of makingthe Pilgrimages, and was consequently ignorant of the religiousceremonies which take place in it. In consequence, I gave him a prettyfull and accurate account I of them, and of the Station which I myselfhad made there. After I had concluded, he requested me to put what I hadtold him upon paper, adding, "I will dress it up and have it inserted inthe next edition. "

I accordingly went home, and on the fourth evening afterwards broughthim the Sketch of the Lough Derg Pilgrim as it now appears, with theexception of some offensive passages which are expunged in this edition. Such was my first introduction to literary life. 

And here I cannot omit paying my sincere tribute of gratefulrecollection to a man from whom I have received so many acts of thewarmest kindness. To me he was a true friend in every sense of the word. In my early trials his purse and his advice often supported, soothed, and improved me. In a literary point of view I am under the deepestobligations to his excellent judgment and good taste. Indeed were itnot for him, I never could have struggled my way through the severedifficulties with which in my early career I was beset. 

 "Green be the turf above thee, Friend of my early days; None knew thee but to love thee, Or named thee but to praise. "

But to my theme, which will be better understood, as will my descriptionof the wild rites performed on the shores of its most celebrated island, by the following extracts, taken from this able and most vivid describerof Irish scenery:

"The road from the village of Petigo leading towards Lough Derg, runsalong a river tumbling over rocks; and then after proceeding for a timeover a boggy valley, you ascend into a dreary and mountainous tract, extremely ugly in itself, but from which you have a fine view indeedof the greatest part of the lower lake of Lough Erne, with itsmany elevated islands, and all its hilly shores, green, wooded, and cultivated, with the interspersed houses of its gentry, andthe comfortable cottages of its yeomanry--the finest yeomanry inIreland--men living in comparative comfort, and having in their figuresand bearing that elevation of character which a sense of loyalty andindependence confers. I had at length, after traveling about threemiles, arrived where the road was discontinued, and by the direction ofmy guide, ascended a mountain-path that brought me through a wretchedvillage, and led to the top of a hill. Here my boy left me, and wentto look for the man who was to ferry us to Purgatory, and on the ridgewhere I stood I had leisure to look around. To the south-west lay LoughErne, with all its isles and cultivated shores; to the north-west layLough Derg, and truly never did I mark such a contrast. Lough Derg undermy feet--the lake, the shores, the mountains, the accompaniments of allsorts presented the very landscape of desolation; its waters expandingin their highland solitude, amidst a wide waste of moors, without onegreen spot to refresh the eye, without a house or tree--all mournful inthe brown hue of its far-stretching bogs, and the gray uniformity of itsrocks; the surrounding mountains even partook of the sombre characterof the place; their forms without grandeur, their ranges continuous andwithout elevation. The lake itself was certainly as fine as rocky shoresand numerous islands could make it: but it was encompassed with suchdreariness; it was deformed so much by its purgatorial island; theassociations connected with it were of such a degrading character, that really the whole prospect before me struck my mind with a sense ofpainfulness, and I said to myself, 'I am already in Purgatory. ' A personwho has never seen the picture that was now under my eye, who had readof a place consecrated by the devotion of ages, towards which the tideof human superstition had flowed for twelve centuries, might imaginethat St. Patrick's Purgatory, secluded in its sacred island, would haveall the venerable and gothic accompaniments of olden time; and its iviedtowers and belfried steeples, its carved windows, and cloistered arches, its long dark aisles and fretted vaults would have risen out of thewater, rivalling Iona or Lindisfarn; but nothing of the sort was to beseen. The island, about half a mile from the shore, presented nothingbut a collection of hideous slated houses and cabins, which gave youan idea that they were rather erected for the purpose of tollhouses orpolice-stations than any thing else. 

"I was certainly in an interesting position. I looked southerly towardsLough Erne, with the Protestant city of Enniskillen rising amidst itswaters, like the island queen of all the loyalty, and industry, andreasonable worship that have made her sons the admiration of pastand present time; and before me, to the north, Lough Derg, with itsfar-famed isle, reposing there as the monstrous birth of a dreary anddegraded superstition, the enemy of mental cultivation, and destined tokeep the human understanding in the same dark unproductive state as themoorland waste that lay outstretched around. I was soon joined by myguide and by two men carrying oars, with whom I descended from the ridgeon which I was perched, towards the shores of the lake, where therewas a sort of boat, or rather toll-house, at which the pilgrims paid acertain sum before they were permitted to embark for the island. In afew minutes we were afloat; and while sitting in the boat I had time toobserve my ferrymen: one was a stupid countryman, who did not speak;the other was an old man with a Woollen night-cap under his hat, abrown snuff-colored coat, a nose begrimed with snuff, a small gray eyeenveloped amidst wrinkles that spread towards his temples in the form ofbirds' claws, and gave to his countenance a sort of leering cunningthat was extremely disagreeable. I found he was the clerk of the islandchapel; that he was a sort of master of the ceremonies in purgatory, andguardian and keeper of it when the station time was over and priests andpilgrims had deserted it. I could plainly perceive that he had smoked meout as a Protestant, that he was on his guard against me as a spy, and that his determination was to get as much and to give as littleinformation as he could; in fact, he seemed to have the desire to obtainthe small sum he expected from me with as little exposure of his cause, and as little explanation of the practices of his craft as possible. The man informed me that the station time was over about a month, and heconfirmed my guide's remark that the Pope's jubilee had much diminishedthe resort of pilgrims during the present season. He informed me alsothat the whole district around the lough, together with all its islands, belonged to Colonel L------, a relation of the Duke of Wellington; andthat this gentleman, as landlord, had leased the ferry of the island tocertain persons who had contracted to pay him L260 a year; and to makeup this sum, and obtain a suitable income for themselves, the ferrymencharged each pilgrim five pence. Therefore, supposing that thecontractors make cent, per cent, by their contract, which it may besupposed they do, the number of pilgrims to this island may be estimatedat 13, 000; and, as my little guide afterwards told me (although thecunning old clerk took care to avoid it), that each pilgrim paid thepriest from 1s. 8d. To 2s. 6d. , therefore we may suppose that the profitto the prior of Lough Derg and his priests was no small sum. 

"In a short time I arrived at the island, and as stepping out of theboat I planted my foot on the rocks of this scene of human absurdity, I felt ashamed for human nature, and looked on myself as one of themillions of fools that have, century after century, degraded theirunderstandings by coming hither. The island I found to be of an ovalshape. 

"The buildings on it consisted of a slated house for the priests, twochapels, and a long range of cabins on the rocky surface of the island, which may contain about half an acre; there were also certain roundwalls about two feet high, enclosing broken stone and wooden crosses;these were called saints' beds, and around these circles, on the sharpand stony rocks, the pilgrims go on their naked knees. Altogether Imay briefly sum up my view of this place, and say that it was filthy, dreary, and altogether detestable--it was a positive waste of time tovisit it, and I hope I shall never behold it again. "*

 * Fire at Lough Derg. --On the 15th Aug 1842, the station at this celebrated place was brought to a conclusion; but in the course of the night it was discovered that some of the houses were on fire, and four dwellings which, we believe, were recently erected, were altogether consumed. The people of the neighboring country directed their efforts chiefly to the preservation of the prior's house, which adjoined those in flames, and by pouring a continued supply of water against its windows, succeeded in saving it. The night being calm, and the wind in a favorable direction, the injury sustained was less than must have existed under different circumstances. The houses burnt were occupied as lodgings for pilgrims when on station. 

The following is extracted from Bishop Henry Jones's account, publishedin 1647:

"The island called St. Patrick's Purgatory is altogether rocky, andrather level; within the compass of the island, in the water towardsthe north-east, about two yards from the shore, stand certain rocks, theleast of which, and next the shore, is the one St. Patrick knelt on forthe third part of the night in prayer, he did another third in his cell, which is called his bed, and another third in the cave or purgatory; inthis stone there is a cleft or print, said to be made by St. Patrick'sknees; the other stone is much greater and further off in the lake, and covered with water, called Lachavanny: this is esteemed of singularvirtue; standing thereon healeth pilgrims' feet, bleeding as they arewith cuts and bruises got in going barefoot round the blessed beds. 

"The entrance into the island is narrow and rocky; these rocks theyreport to be the guts of a great serpent metamorphosed into stones. When Mr. Copinger, a gentleman drawn thither by the fame of the place, visited it, there was a church covered with shingles dedicated to St. Patrick, and it was thus furnished: at the east end was a high altarcovered with linen, over which did hang the image of our Lady with ourSaviour in her arms; on the right did hang the picture of the threekings offering their presents to our Saviour; and on the left thepicture of our Saviour on the cross; near the altar, and on the southside, did stand on the ground an old worm-eaten image of St. Patrick;and behind the altar was another of the same fabric, but still olderin appearance, called. St Arioge; and on the right hand another imagecalled St. Volusianus. 

"Between the church and the cave there is a small rising ground, and ona heap of stones lay a little stone cross, part broken, part standing;and. In the east of the church was another cross made of twigsinterwoven: 'this is known by the name of St. Patrick's altar, on whichlie three pieces of a bell, which they say St. Patrick used to carryin, his hand. Here also was laid a certain knotty bone of some bigness, hollow in the midst like the nave of a wheel, and out of which issue, as it were, natural spokes: this was: shown as a great rarity, beingpart of a great, serpent's tail--one of those monsters the blessedPatrick expelled out of Ireland. 

"Towards the narrowest part of the island were six circles--some callthem saints' beds, or beds of penance. Pilgrims are continually prayingand kneeling about these beds; and they are compassed around withsharp stones and difficult passages for the accommodation of such as gobarefooted. 

"In the farthest part northward of the island, are certain beds of stonecast together; as memorials for some that are elsewhere; buried; butwho trust to the prayers and merits of those who daily resort to thisPurgatory. Lastly, in this island are several Irish cabins covered withthatch, and another for shriving or confession; and there are: separateplaces assigned for those who come from the four provinces of Ireland. 

"In all, the pilgrims remain on the island nine days; they eat but oncein the twenty-four hours, of oatmeal and water. They have liberty torefresh themselves with the water of the lake, which, as Roth says, 'isof such virtue, that though thou shouldst fill thyself with it, yetwill it not offend; but is as if it flowed from some mineral. '

"The pilgrims at night lodge or lie on straw, without pillow or pallet, rolling themselves in their mantles, and wrapping their heads in theirbreeches; only on some one of the eight nights they must lie on one ofthe saints' beds, whichever they like. "

 * * * * *

I was, at the time of performing this station, in the middle ofmy nineteenth year--of quick perception--warm imagination--a mindpeculiarly romantic--a morbid turn for devotion, and a candidate for thepriesthood, having been made slightly acquainted with Latin, and moreslightly still with Greek. 

At this period, however, all my faculties merged like friendly streamsinto the large current of my devotion. Of religion I was completelyignorant, although I had sustained a very conspicuous part in thedevotions of the family, and signalized myself frequently; by takingthe lead in a rosary. I had often out-prayed and out-fasted an oldcirculating pilgrim, who occasionally visited our family; a feat onwhich few would have ventured; and I even arrived to such a pitch ofperfection at praying, that with the assistance of young and powerfullungs, I was fully able to distance him at any English prayer in whichwe joined. But in Latin, I must allow, that owing to my imperfectknowledge of its pronunciation, and to some twitches of conscience Ifelt on adventuring to imitate, him by overleaping this impediment, hewas able to throw me back a considerable distance in his turn; so thatwhen we both started for a _De Profundis_, I was always sure to comein second. Owing to all this I was considered a young man of promise, being, moreover, as my master often told my father, a youth ofprodigious parts and great cuteness. Indeed, on this subject my master'sveracity could not be questioned; because when I first commenced Latin, I was often heard repeating the prescribed tasks in my sleep. Many ofhis relations had already, even upon the strength of my prospectivepriesthood, begun to claim relationship with our family, and before Iwas nineteen, I found myself godfather to a dozen godsons and as manygod-daughters; every one of whom I had with unusual condescensiontaken under my patronage; and most of the boys were named after myself. Finding that I was thus responsible for so much, in the opinion of myfriends, and having the aforesaid character of piety to sustain, I foundit indispensable to make the pilgrimage. Not that I considered myself asinner, or by any means bound to go from that motive, for although theopinion of my friends, as to my talents and sanctity, was exceedinglyhigh, yet, I assure you, it cut but a very indifferent figure, whencompared with my own on both these subjects. 

I very well remember that the first sly attempt I ever made at a miraclewas in reference to Lough Derg; I tried it by way of preparation formy pilgrimage. I heard that there had been a boat lost there, about theyear 1796, and that a certain priest who was in her as a passenger, hadwalked very calmly across the lake to the island, after the bout and therest of the passengers in her had all gone to the bottom. Now, I had, from my childhood, a particular prejudice against sailing in a boat, although Dick Darcy, a satirical and heathenish old bachelor, who neverwent to Mass, used often to tell me, with a grin which I was never ablerightly to understand, that I might have no prejudice against sailing, "because, " Dick would say, "take my word for it, you'll never die bydrowning. " At all events, I thought to myself, that should any suchuntoward accident occur to me, it would be no unpleasant circumstanceto imitate the priest; but that it would be infinitely more agreeableto make the first experiment in a marl-pit, on my father's farm, thanon the lake. Accordingly, after three days' fasting, and praying for thepower of not sinking in the water, I slipped very quietly down to thepit, and after reconnoitering the premises, to be sure there was nolooker-on, I approached the brink. At this moment my heart beat highwith emotion, my soul was wrapt up to a most enthusiastic pitchof faith, and my whole spirit absorbed in feelings, wherehope--doubt--gleams of uncertainty--visions of future eminence--twitchesof fear--reflections on my expertness in swimming--on the success of thewater-walking priest afore-mentioned--and on the depth of the pond--hadall insisted on an equal share of attention. At the edge of the pit grewlarge water-lilies, with their leaves spread over the surface; it issingular to reflect upon what slight and ridiculous circumstancesthe mind will seize, when wound up in this manner to a pitch ofsuperstitious absurdity. I am really ashamed, even whilst writing this, of the confidence I put for a moment in a treacherous water-lily, as itsleaf lay spread so smoothly and broadly over the surface of the pond, asif to lure my foot to the experiment. However, after having stimulatedmyself by a fresh pater and ave, I advanced, my eyes turned upenthusiastically to heaven--my hands resolutely clenched--myteeth locked together--my nerves set--and my whole soul strong inconfidence--I advanced, I say, and lest I might give myself time to coolfrom this divine glow, I made a tremendous stride, planting my rightfoot exactly in the middle of the treacherous water-lily leaf, andthe next moment was up to the neck in water. Here was devotion cooled. Happily I was able to bottom the pool, or could swim very well, ifnecessary; so I had not much difficulty in getting out. As soon as Ifound myself on the bank, I waited not to make reflections, but with arueful face set off at full speed for my father's house, which was notfar distant; the water all the while whizzing out of nay clothes, bythe rapidity of the motion, as it does from a water-spaniel after havingbeen in that element. It is singular to think what a strong authorityvanity has over the principles and passions in the weakest and strongestmoments of both; I never was remarkable, at that open, ingenuous periodof my life, for secrecy; yet did I now take especial care not to investeither this attempt at the miraculous, or its concomitant failure, withanything like narration. It was, however, an act of devotion that hada vile effect on my lungs, for it gave me a cough that was intolerable;and I never felt the infirmities of humanity more than in this ludicrousattempt to get beyond them; in which, by the way, I was nearer beingsuccessful than I had intended, though in a different sense. Thishappened a month before I started for Lough Derg. 

It was about six o'clock of a delightful morning in the pleasant monthof July, when I set out upon my pilgrimage, with a single change oflinen in my pocket, and a pair of discarded shoes upon my bare feet;for, in compliance with the general rule, I wore no stockings. The sunlooked down upon all nature with great good humor; everything smiledaround me; and as I passed for a few miles across an upland countrywhich stretched down from a chain of dark rugged mountains that laywestward, I could not help feeling, although the feeling was indeedchecked--that the scene was exhilarating. The rough upland was inseveral places diversified with green spots of cultivated land, withsome wood, consisting of an old venerable plantation of mountain pine, that hung on the convex sweep of a large knoll away to my right, --witha broad sheet of lake that curled to the fresh arrowy breeze of morning, on which a variety of water-fowl were flapping their wings or skimmingalong, leaving a troubled track on the peaceful waters behind them;there were also deep intersections of precipitous or sloping glens, graced with hazel, holly, and every description of copse-wood. On otheroccasions I have drunk deeply of pleasure, when in the midst of thisscenery, bearing about me the young, free, and bounding spirit, itsfirst edge of enjoyment unblunted by the collision of base minds andstony hearts, against which experience jostles us in maturer life. 

The dew hung shining upon the leaves, and fell in pattering showersfrom the trees, as a bird, alarmed at my approach, would spring from thebranch and leave it vibrating in the air behind her; the early challengeof the cock grouse, and the _quick-go-quick_ of the quail, werecheerfully uttered on all sides. The rapid martins twittered withpeculiar glee, or, in the light caprice of their mirth, placedthemselves for a moment upon the edge of a scaur, or earthly precipice, in which their nests were built, and then shot up again to mingle withthe careering and joyful flock that cut the air in every direction. Where is the heart which could not enjoy such a morning scene? Under anyother circumstances it would have enchanted me; but here, in fact, that intensity of spirit which is necessary to the due contemplation ofbeautiful prospects, was transferred to a gloomier object. I was underthe influence of a feeling quite new to me. It was not pleasure, nor wasit pain, but a chilliness of soul which proceeded from the gloomy andsevere task that I had undertaken--a task which, when I considered thedanger and the advantages annexed to its performance, was sufficient toabstract me from every other object. It was really the first exerciseof that jealous spirit of mistaken devotion which keeps the soul inperpetual sickness, and invests the innocent enjoyments of life witha character of sin and severity. It was this gloomy feeling that couldalone have strangled in their birth those sensations which the wisdomof God has given as a security in some degree against sin, by openingto the heart of man sources of pleasure, for which the soul is notcompelled to barter away her innocence, as in those of a grosser nature. I may be wrong in analyzing the sensation, but for the first time in mylife I felt anxious and unhappy; yet, according to my own opinions, Ishould have been otherwise. I was startled at what I experienced, andbegan to consider it as a secret intimation that I had chosen a wrongtime for my journey. I even felt as if it would not prosper--as if someaccident or misfortune would befall me ere my return. The boat mightsink, as in 1796: this was quite alarming. The miraculous experimenton the pond here occurred to me with full force, and came before myimagination in a new point of view. The drenching I got had a deepand fearful meaning. It was ominous--it was prophetic, --and sent by amerciful Providence to deter me from attending the pilgrimage at thispeculiar time--perhaps on this particular day: to-morrow the spell mightbe broken, the danger past, and the difference of a single day could benothing. Just at this moment an unlucky hare, starting from an adjoiningthicket, scudded across my path, as if to fill up the measure of theseominous predictions. I paused, and my foot was on the very turn to therightabout, when instantly a thought struck me which produced a reactionin my imagination. Might not all this be the temptation of the devil, suggested to prevent me from performing this blessed work? not the hareitself be some------? In short, the counter-current carried me withit. I had commenced my journey, and every one knows that when a mancommences a journey it is unlucky to turn back. On I went, but stillwith a subdued and melancholy tone of feeling. If I met a cheerfulcountryman, his mirth found no kindred spirit in me: on the contrary, my taciturnity seemed to infect him; for, after several ineffectual'attempts at conversation, he gradually became silent, or hummed a tuneto himself, and, on parting, bade me a short, doubtful kind of good day, looking over his shoulder, as he departed, with a face of scrutiny andsurprise. 

After getting five or six miles across the country, I came out on oneof these by-roads which run independently of all advantages of locality, "up hill and down dale, " from one little obscure village to another. These roads are generally paved with round broad stones, laid curiouslytogether in longitudinal rows like the buttons on a schoolboy's jacket;Owing to the infrequency of travellers on them, they are quite overgrownwith grass, except in one stripe along the middle, which is kept nakedby the hoofs of horses and the tread of foot passengers. There is sometradition connected with these roads, or the manner of their formation, which I do not remember. 

At last I came out upon the main road; and you will be pleased toimagine to yourself the figure of a tall, gaunt, gawkish young man, dressed in a good suit of black cloth, with shirt and cravat like snow, striding solemnly along, without shoe or stocking; for about this time Iwas twelve miles from home, and blisters had already risen upon my feet, in consequence of the dew having got into my shoes, which at the bestwere enough to cut up any man; I had therefore to strip and carry myshoes--one in my pocket, and another stuffed in my hat; being thus withgreat reluctance compelled to travel barefoot: yet I soon turned eventhis to account, when I reflected that it would enhance the merit ofmy pilgrimage, and that every fresh blister would bring down a freshblessing. 'Tis true I was nettled to the soul, on perceiving the faceof a laborer on the way-side, or of a traveller who met me, graduallyexpanding into a broad sarcastic grin, as such an unaccountable figurepassed him. But these I soon began to suspect were Protestant grins;for none but heretics would presume by any means to give me a sneer. TheCatholics taking me for a priest, were sure to doff their hats to me; orif they wore none, as is not unfrequent when at labor, they would catchtheir forelocks with their finger and thumb, and bob down their headsin the act of veneration. This attention of my brethren more thancompensated for the mirth of all other sects; in fact, their mistakingme for a priest began to give me a good opinion of myself, and perfectlyreconciled me to the fatiguing severity of the journey. 

I have had occasion to remark, while upon this pilgrimage, or ratherlong afterwards, --for I was but little versed then in the science ofreflection--that it is impossible to calculate upon the capabilitiesof either body or mind, until they are drawn out by some occasion ofpeculiar interest, in which those of either or both are thrown upontheir own energies and resources. In my opinion, the great secret orthe directing principle of all enterprise rests in the motive of action;for, whenever a suitable interest can be given to the principles ofhuman conduct, the person bound by, and feeling that interest will notonly perform as much as could possibly be expected from his naturalpowers, but he will recruit his energies by drawing in all theadventitious aid which the various relations of that interest, as theyextend to other objects, are capable of affording him. It was amazing, for instance, to observe the vigor and perseverance with which feeble, sickly old creatures, performed the necessary austerities of thisdreadful pilgrimage;--creatures, who if put to the same fatigue, on anyother business, would at once sink under it; but the motive suppliedenergy, and the infirmities of nature borrowed new strength from thedeep and ardent devotion of the spirit. 

The first that I suspected of being fellow pilgrims were two women whomI overtook upon the way. They were dressed in gray cloaks, striped redand blue petticoats; drugget, or linseywoolsey gowns, that came withinabout three inches of their ankles. Each had a small white bag slung ather back, which contained the scanty provisions for the journey, and theoaten cakes, crisp and hard-baked, for the pilgrimage to the lake. Thehoods of their cloaks fell down their backs, and each dame had a spottedcotton kerchief pinned around her _dowd_ cap at the chin, whilst theremainder of it fell down the shoulders, over the cloaks. Each had alsoa staff in her hand, which she held in a manner peculiar to a travellingwoman--that is, with her hand round the upper end of it, her right thumbextended across its head, and her arm, from the elbow down, parallelwith the horizon. The form of each, owing to the want of that spinalstrength and vigor which characterize the erect gait of man, was bent alittle forward, and this, joined to the idea produced by the natureof their journey, gave to them something of an ardent and devotedcharacter, such as the mind and eye would seek for in a pilgrim, I sawthem at some distance before me, and knew by the staves and white bagsbehind them that they were bound for Lough Derg. I accordingly stretchedout a little that I might overtake them; for in consequence of theabsorbing nature of my own reflections, my journey had only been asolitary one, and I felt that society would relieve me. I was not alittle surprised, however, on finding that as soon as I topped oneheight of the road, I was sure to find my two old ladies a competentdistance before me in the hollow (most of the northern roads are of thisnature), and that when I got to the bottom, I was as sure to perceivetheir heads topping the next hill, and then gradually sinking out ofmy sight. I was surprised at this, and perhaps a little nettled, that afresh active young fellow should not have sufficient mettle readily toovertake two women. I did stretch out, therefore, with some vigor, yetit was not till after a chase of two miles or so that I found myselfabreast of them. As soon as they noticed me they dropped a curtesy each, addressing me at the same time as a clergyman, and I returned theirsalutation with all due gravity. Upon my inquiring how far they hadtravelled that day, it appeared that they had actually performed ajourney seven miles longer than mine: "We needn't ax your Reverence ifyou're for the Islan'?" said one of them. "I am, " I replied, not caringto undeceive her as to my Reverentiality. 

The truth was, in the midst of all my sanctity I felt proud of the oldwoman's mistake as to my priesthood, and really had not so much readyvirtue about me, on the occasion, as was sufficient to undeceive her. I was even thankful to her for the inquiry, and thought, on acloser inspection, I perceived an uncommon portion of good sense andintelligence in her face. "My very excellent, worthy woman, " said I, "how is it that you are able to travel at such a rate, when one wouldsuppose you should be fatigued by this time, after so long a journey?"

"Musha?" said she, "but your Reverence ought to know that. "--I feltpuzzled at this: "How should I know it?" said I. 

"I'm sure, " she continued, "you couldn't expect a poor ould crathur o'sixty to travel at this rate, at all at all; except for raisons, yourReverence:"--looking towards me quite confidently and knowingly. Thiswas still more oracular, and I felt very odd under it; my character fordevotion was at stake, and I feared that the old lady was drawing meinto a kind of vicious circle. "Your Reverence knows, that for the likeso' me, that can hardly move to the market of a Saturday, Lord help me!an' home agin, for to travel at this rate, would be impossible, anyhow, except, " she added, "for what I'm carryin', sir, blessed be God forit!"--peering at me again with more knowing and triumphant look. 

"Why that's true, " said I, thoughtfully; and then, assuming a bit ofthe sacerdotal privilege, and suddenly raising my voice, though I was asinnocent as the child unborn of her meaning, --"that's true; but nowas you appear to be a sensible, pious woman, I hope you-understand thenature of what you are carrying--and in a proper manner, too, for youknow that's the chief point. "

"Why, Father dear, I do my best, avourneen; an' I ought of a sartinty toknow it, bekase blessed Friar Hagan spent three dys instructin' Mat andmyself in it; an' more betoken, that Mat sent him a sack o' phaties, an' a bag of oats for his trouble, not forgettin' the goose he gotfrom myself, the Micklemas afther. --Arrah how long is that ago, Kattya-haygur?" said she, addressing her companion. 

"Ten years, " said Katty. "Oh! it's more, I'm thinkin'; it's ten yearssince poor Dick, God rest his sowl, died, and this was full two yearsafore that: but no matther, agra, I'll let your Reverence hear theprayer, at any rate. " She here repeated a beautiful Irish prayer to theBlessed Virgin, of which that beginning with "Hail, holy Queen!" in theRoman Catholic prayer-books is a translation, or perhaps the original. While she was repeating the prayer, I observed her hand in her bosom, apparently extricating something, which, on being brought out, provedto be a scapular; she held it up, that I might see it: "Your Reverence, "said she, "this is the ninth journey of the kind I made: but you don'twonder now, I bleeve, how stoutly I'm able to stump it. "

"You really do stump it stoutly, as you' say, " I replied. 

"Ay, " said she, "an' not a wan' o' me but's as weak as a cat, at homescarce can put a hand to any thing; but then, your Reverence, my eldestdaughter, Ellish, jist minds the house, an' lots the ould mother mindthe prayers, as I'm not able to do a hand's turn, worth namin'. "

"But you appear to be stout and healthy, " I observed, "if a person mayjudge by your looks. "

"Glory be to them that giv it to me then! that I am at the present time, _padre dheelish_. But don't you know I'm always so durin' this journey;I've a wicket heart-burn that torments the very life out o' me, all theyear round till this; and what 'ud your Reverence think, but it's sureto lave me, clear and clane, and a fortnight or so afore I come here; Inever wanst feels a bit iv it, while I rouse and prepare myself for theIsland, nor for a month after I come here agen, Glory be to God. "She then turned to her companion, and commenced, in a voice halfaudible--"Musha! Katty a-haygur, did ye iver lay your two livin' eyeson so young a priest? a sweet and holy crathur he is, no doubt, and hasgoodness in his face, may the Lord bless him!"

"Musha!" said she, "surely your Reverence can't be long afther bein'ordained, I'm thinkin'?"

"Well, that's very strange, " said I, evading her, "so you tell me yourheartburn leaves you, and that you get stout every year about the timeof your pilgrimage?"

"An' troth an' I do!--hut! what am I sayin'? Indeed, sir, may be that'smore than I can say, either, your Reverence: but for sartin'it is"--

"Do you mean that you do, or that you do not?" I inquired. 

"Indeed, your Reverence, you jist hot it--the Lord bless you, and spareyou to the parents that reared ye; an' proud people may they be athaving the likes of 'im, Katty avourneen"--turning abruptly to Katty, that she might disarm my interogatories on this tender subject with abetter grace--"proud people, as I said afore, the Lord may spare him tothem!"

We here topped a little hill, and saw the spire of a steeple, and theskirts of a country town, which a passenger told us was about threemiles distant. 

My feet by this time were absolutely in griskins, nor was I by any meansprepared for a most unexpected proposal, which the spokeswoman, aftersome private conversation with the other, undertook to make. I could notimagine what the purport of the dialogue was; but I easily saw, thatI myself was the subject of it, for I could perceive them glance at meoccasionally, as if they felt a degree of hesitation in laying downthe matter for my approval; at length she opened it with greatadroitness:--"Musha, an' to be sure he will, Katty dear an' darlin'--andmightn't you know he would--the refusin' to do it isn't in his face, asany body that has eyes to see may know--you ashamed!--and what for wouldye be ashamed?--asthore, it's 'imself that's not proud, or he wouldn'ttramp it, barefooted, along wud two ould crathurs like huz; him that hasno sin to answer for--but I'll spake to 'im myself, and yell see it'she that won't refuse it. Why thin, your Reverence, Katty an' I warthinkin', that as there's only three of us, an' the town's afore us, where we'll rest a while, plaise God--for by that time the shower that'saway over there will be comin' down;--that as there's but three of us, would it be any harm if we sed a bit of a Rosary, and your Reverence tojoin us?"

This was, indeed, a most unexpected attack; but it was evident that Iwas set down by this curious woman as a paragon of piety; thoughindeed her object was rather to smooth the way in my mind, for what sheintended should be a very excellent opinion of her own godliness. 

I looked about me, and as far as my eye could reach, the road appearedsolitary. I did, 'tis true, debate the matter with myself, pro and con, for I felt the absurdity of my situation, and of this abrupt proposal, more than I was willing to suppose I did. Still, thought I, it is aserious thing to refuse praying with this poor woman, because she ispoor--God is no respecter of person--this too is a Rosary to the BlessedVirgin; besides, nothing can be too humbling for a person when onceengaged in this holy station--"So, pride, I trample you under my feet!"said I to myself, at a moment when the appearance of a respectableperson on the road would have routed all my humility. I complied, however, with a very condescending grace, and to it we went. The oldwomen pulled out their beads, and I got my hat, which had one of myshoes in it, under my arm. They requested that I would open the Rosary, which I did: and thus we kept tossing the ball of prayer from one toanother along the way, whilst I was bending and sinking on the hardgravel in perfect agony. But we had not gone far, when the shower, whichwe did not suppose would have fallen until we should reach the town, began to descend with greater bounty than we were at all prepared for, or than I was, at least; for I had no outside coat: but indeed themorning was so beautiful, that rain was scarcely to be apprehended. Withrespect to the old lady, she appeared to be better acquainted with thenecessary preparations for such a journey than I had been: for as soonas the shower became heavy (and it fell very heavily), she whipped offher cloak, and before I could say a syllable to the contrary, had itpinned about me. She then drew out of a large four-cornered pocketof red cloth, that hung at her side, a hare's-skin cap, which ina twinkling was on her own cranium. But what was most singular, considering the heat of the weather, was the appearance of an excellentfrieze jacket, such as porters and draymen usually wear, with twooutside pockets on the sides, into one of which she drove her arm up tothe elbow, and in the other hand carried her staff like a man--I thoughtshe wore the cap, too, a little to the one side on her head. Indeed, a more ludicrous appearance could scarcely be conceived than she nowexhibited. I, on the other hand, cut an original figure, being sixfeet high, with a short gray cloak pinned tightly about me, my blackcassimere small-clothes peeping below it--my long, yellow, polar legs, unencumbered with calves, quite naked--a good hat over the cloak--butno shoes on my feet, marching thus gravely upon my pilgrimage, with twosuch figures!

In this singular costume did we advance the rain all the time fallingin torrents. The town, however, was not far distant, and we arrived ata little thatched house, where "dry lodgin'" was offered above the door, both to "man and baste;" and never did an unfortunate group stand morein need of dry lodging, for we were wet to the skin. On entering thetown, we met a carriage, in which were a gentleman and two ladies: Ichanced to be walking a little before the woman, but could perceive, bycasting a glance into the carriage, that they were in convulsions withlaughter; to which I have strong misgivings of having contributed in noordinary degree. But I felt more indignant at the wit, forsooth, of thewell-fed serving-man behind the coach, who should also have his jokeupon us; for as we passed, he turned to my companion, whom he addressedas a male personage--"And why, you old villain, do you drive your cub tothe 'island' pinioned in such a manner, --give him the use of hisarms, you sinner!"--thus intimating that I was a booby son of her'sin leading-strings. The old lady looked at him with a very peculiarexpression of countenance; I thought she smiled, but never did a smileappear to me so pregnant with bitterness and cursing scorn. "Ay, " saidshe, "there goes the well-fed heretic, that neither fasts nor prays--hisGod is his belly--they have the fat of the land for the present, yourReverence, but wait a bit. In the mane time, we had betther get inhere a little, till this shower passes--you see the sun's beginnin' tobrighten behind the rain, so it can't last long: and a bit of breakfastwill do none of us any harm. " We then entered the house aforesaid, whichpresented a miserable prospect for refreshment; but as I was in somemeasure identified with my fellow-travelers, I could not with a goodgrace give them up. I had not at the time the least experience of theworld, was incapable of that discrimination which guides some people, asit were by instinct, in choosing their society, and had altogether buta poor notion of the more refined decorum of life. When we got in, theequivocal lady began to exercise some portion of authority. "Come, " saidshe, "here's a clargyman, and you had betther lose no time in gettin'his Reverence his breakfast;" then, said, the civil creature to themistress, in the same kind of half audible tone--

"Avourneen, if you have anything comfortable, get it for him; he isgenerous, an' will pay you well for it; a blessed crathur he is too, asever brought good luck under your roof; Lord love you, if ye hard himdiscoursin' uz along the road, as if he was one of ourselves, so mildand sweet! I'm sure I'll always have a good opinion of myself forputtin' on the jacket this bout, at any rate, as I was able to spare hisReverence the cloak, a-haygur! the mild crathur!"

While my fellow traveller was thus talking, I had time to observe thatthe woman of the house was a cleanly-looking creature, with something ofa sickly appearance. An old gray-headed man sat in something between achair and a stool, formed of one solid piece of ash, supported by threelegs sloping outwards; the seat of it was quite smooth by long use, anda circular row of rungs, capped by a piece of semicircular wood, shapedto receive the reclining body of whoever might occupy it, rose from theseat in presumptuous imitation of an arm-chair. There were two otherchairs besides this, but the remainder of the seats were all stools. Theroom was square, with a bed in each of the corners adjoining the fire, covered with blue drugget quilts, stoutly quilted; there was anotherroom in which the travellers slept. Opposite me on the wall was theappropriate picture of St. Patrick himself, with his crosier in hand, driving all kinds of venomous reptiles out of the kingdom. The Hermitof Killamey was on his right, and the Yarmouth Tragedy, or the dolorioushistory of Jemmy and Nancy, two unfortunate lovers, on his left. Such isthe rigorous economy of a pilgrimage, and such is the circumstances ofthe greater part of those who undertake it, that it is to houses of thisdescription the generality of them resort. These "dry lodging" housesmay not improperly be called Pilgrims' Inns, a great number of thembeing opened only during the continuance of the three months in whichthe stations are performed. 

Breakfast was now got ready, but it was evident that my two companionshad not been taken into account; for there was "an equipage" only forone. I inquired from my speaking partner if she and her fellow-travellerwould not breakfast. The only reply I received was a sorrowful shakeof the head, and "Och, no, plaise your Reverence, no!" in quite anexhausted cadence. On hearing this, the kind landlady gave them a lookof uncommon pity, exclaiming at the same time, as if in communicationwith her own feelings, "Musha, God pity them, the poor crathurs; anthey surely can't but be both wake an ungry afther sich a journey, thisblessed an' broilin'day--och! och! if I had it or could afford it, an'they shouldn't want, any way--arrah, won't ye thry and ate a bit ofsomething?" addressing herself to them. "Ooh, then, no, alanna, but I'djust thank ye for a dhrink of cowld wather, if ye plase; an' that maybe the strengthenin' of us a bit. " I saw at once that their own littlestock of provisions, if they really had any, was too scanty to allow thesimple creatures the indulgence of a regular meal; still I thoughtthey might, if they felt so very weak, have taken even the slightestrefreshment from their bags. However, I was bound in honor, and also incharity, to give them their breakfast, which I ordered accordinglyfor them both, it being, I considered, only fair that as we had prayedtogether we should eat together. Whilst we were at breakfast, thelandlady, with a piece of foresight for which I afterwards thanked her, warmed a pot of water, in which my feet were bathed; she then took out alarge three-cornered pincushion with tassels, which hung at her side, adarning needle, and having threaded it, she drew a white woollen threadseveral times along a piece of soap, pressing it down with her thumbuntil it was quite soapy; this she drew very tenderly through theblisters which were risen on my feet, cutting it at both ends, andleaving a part of it in the blister. It is decidedly the best remedythat ever was tried, for I can declare that during the remainder of mypilgrimage, not one of these blisters gave me the least pain. 

When breakfast was over, and these kind attentions performed, we set outonce more; and from this place, I remarked, as we advanced, that an oddtraveller would fall in upon the way: so that before we had gone manymiles farther, the fatigue of the journey was much lessened by thesociety of the pilgrims. These were now collected into little groups, offrom three to a dozen, each, with the exception of myself and one ortwo others of a decenter cast, having the staff and bag. The chat andanecdotes were, upon the whole, very amusing; but although there was agreat variety of feature, character, and costume among so many, asmust always be the case where people of different lives, habits, andpursuits, are brought together; still I could perceive that there was ashade of strange ruminating abstraction apparent on all. I could observethe cheerful narrator relapse into a temporary gloom, or a fit ofdesultory reflection, as some train of thought would suddenly risein his mind. I could sometimes perceive a shade of pain; perhaps ofanguish, darken the countenance of another, as if a bitter recollectionwas awakened; yet this often changed, by an unexpected transition, toa gleam of joy and satisfaction, as if a quick sense or hope of reliefflashed across his heart. 

When we came near Petigo, the field for observation was much enlarged. The road was then literally alive with pilgrims, and reminded me, as faras numbers were concerned, of the multitudes that flocked to market ona fair-day. Petigo is a snug little town, three or four miles from thelake, where the pilgrims all sleep on the night before the commencementof their stations. When we were about five or six miles from it, theroad presented a singular variety of grouping. There were men andwomen of all ages, from the sprouting devotee of twelve, to the hoary, tottering pilgrim of eighty, creeping along, bent over his staff, toperform this soul-saving work, and die. 

Such is the reverence in which this celebrated place is held, that aswe drew near it, I remarked the conversation to become slack; every faceput on an appearance of solemnity and thoughtfulness, and no man wasinclined to relish the conversation of his neighbor or to speak himself. The very women were silent. Even the lassitude of the journey wasunfelt, and the unfledged pilgrim, as he looked up in his father's ormother's face, would catch the serious and severe expression he sawthere, and trot silently on, forgetting that he was fatigued. 

For my part, I felt the spirit of the scene strongly, yet, perhaps, notwith such an exclusive interest as others. I had not only awe, terror, enthusiasm, pride, and devotion to manage, but suffered heavy annoyancefrom the inroad of a villanous curiosity which should thrust itselfamong the statelier feelings of the occasion, and set all attempts torestrain it at defiance. It was a sad bar to my devotions, which, but for its intrusion, I might have conducted with more meritorious. Steadiness. How, for instance, was it possible for me to register thetransgressions of my whole life, heading them under the "seven deadlysins, " with such a prospect before me as the beautiful waters and shoresof Lough Erne?

Despite of all the solemnity about me, my unmanageable eye would turnfrom the very blackest of the seven deadly offences, and the stoutestof the four cardinal virtues, to the beetling, abrupt, and precipitousrocks which hung over the lake as if ready to tumble into its waters. Ibroke away, too, from several "acts of contrition" to conjecturewhether the dark, shadowy inequalities which terminated the horizon, and penetrated, methought, into the very skies far beyond the lake, weremountains or clouds: a dark problem, which to this day I have not beenable to solve. Nay, I was taken twice, despite of the most virtuousefforts to the contrary, from a _Salve Regina_, to watch a little skiff, which shone with its snowy sail spread before the radiant evening sun, and glided over the waters, like an angel sent on some happy-message. Infact, I found my heart on the point of corruption, by indulging in whatI had set down in my vocabulary as the lust of the eye, and had somefaint surmise that I was plunging into obduracy. I accordingly made aprivate mark with the nail of my thumb, on the "act of contrition" in myprayer-book, and another on the _Salve Regina_, that I might rememberto confess for these devilish wanderings. But what all my personal pietycould not effect, a lucky turn in the road accomplished, by bringing mefrom the view of the lake; and thus ended my temptations and my defeatson these points. 

When we got into Petigo, we found the lodging-houses considerablycrowded. I contrived, however, to establish myself as well as another, and in consequence of my black, dress and the garrulous industry of myepicene companion, who stuck close to me all along, was treated withmore than common respect. And here I was deeply impressed with theremarkable contour of many visages, which I had now a better opportunityof examining than while on the road. There seemed every description ofguilt, and every degree of religious feeling, mingled together in thesame mass, and all more or less subdued by the same principle of abruptand gloomy abstraction. 

There was a little man dressed in a turned black coat, and drabcassimere small-clothes, who struck me as a remarkable figure; his backwas long, his legs and thighs short and he walked on the edge of hisfeet. He had a pale, sorrowful face, with bags hung under his eyes, drooping eyelids, no beard, no brows, and no chin; for in the place ofthe two latter, there was a slight frown where the brows ought to havebeen, and a curve in the place of the chin, merely perceptible from thebottom of his underlip to his throat. He wore his own hair, which was alight bay, so that you could scarcely distinguish it from a wig. I wasgiven to understand that he was a religious tailor under three blessedorders. 

There was another round-shouldered man, with black, twinkling eyes, plump face, rosy cheeks, and nose twisted at the top. In his character, humor appeared to be the predominant principle. He was evidently anoriginal, and, I am sure, had the knack of turning the ludicrous sideof every object towards him. His eye would roll about from one person toanother while fingering his beads, with an expression of humor somethinglike delight beaming from his fixed, steady countenance; and whenanything that would have been particularly worthy of a joke met hisglance, I could perceive a tremulous twinkle of the eye intimating hisinward enjoyment. I think still this jocular abstinence was to him theseverest part of the pilgrimage. I asked him was he ever at the "Island"before; he peered into my face with a look that infected me withrisibility, without knowing why, shrugged up his shoulders, looked intothe fire, and said "No, " with a dry emphatic cough after it--as much asto say, you may apply my answer to the future as well as to the past. Religion, I thought, was giving him up, or sent him here as a lastresource. He spoke to nobody. 

A little behind the humorist sat a very tall, thin, important-lookingpersonage, dressed in a shabby black coat; there was a cast of severityand self-sufficiency in his face, which at once indicated him to bea man of office and authority, little accustomed to have his ownwill disputed. I was not wrong in my conjecture; he was a classicalschoolmaster, and was pompously occupied, when I first saw him, reading through his spectacles, with his head raised aloft, the sevenPenitential Psalms in Latin, out of the Key of Paradise, to a circleof women and children, along with two or three men in frieze coats, wholistened with profound attention. 

A little to the right of Syntax, were a man and woman--the man engagedin teaching the woman a Latin charm against the colic, to which it seemsshe was subject. Although they all, for the most part, who were in thelarge room about us, prayed aloud, yet by fastening the attention on anyparticular person, you could hear what he said. I therefore heard, thewords of this charm, and as my memory is not bad, I still remember them;they ran thus:

_Petrus sedebat super lapidem marmoreain juxta cedem Jerusalem etdolebat, Jesus veniebat et rogabat "Petre, quid doles?" "Doleo ventoventre. " "Surge, Petre, et sanus esto. " Et quicunque haec verba nonscripta sed memoriter tradita recitat nunquam dolebit vento ventre_. 

These are the words literally, but I need not say, that had the poorwoman sat there since, she would not have got them impressed on hermemory. 

There were also other countenances in which a man might almost readthe histories of their owners. Methought I could perceive the lurking, unsubdued spirit of the battered rake, in the leer of his roving eye, while he performed, in the teeth of his flesh, blood, and principles, the delusive vow to which the shrinking spirit, at the approach ofdeath, on the bed of sickness, clung, as to its salvation; for it wasevident that superstition had only exacted from libertinism what fearand ignorance had promised her. 

I could note the selfish, griping miser, betraying his own soul, andholding a false promise to his heart, as with lank jaw, keen eye, andbrow knit with anxiety for the safety of his absent wealth, he joinedsome group, sager if possible to defraud them even of the benefit oftheir prayers, and attempting to practise that knavery upon heaven whichhad been so successful upon earth. 

I could see the man of years, I thought, withering away under thedisconsolation of an ill-spent life, old without peace, and gray withoutwisdom, flattering himself that he is religious because he prays, and making a merit of offering to God that which Satan had rejected;thinking, too, that he has withdrawn from sin, because the abilityof committing it has left him, and taking credit for subduing hispropensities, although they have only died in his nature. 

I could mark, too, I fancied, the stiff, set features of the pharisee, affecting to instruct others, that he might show his own superiority, and descanting on the merits of works, that his hearers might know heperformed them himself. 

I could also observe the sly, demure over-doings of the hypocrite, andmark the deceitful lines of grave meditation running along that partof his countenance where in others the front of honesty lies open andexpanded. I could trace him when he got beyond his depth, where the wantof sincerity in religion betrayed his ignorance of its forms. I couldnote the scowling, sharp-visaged bigot, wrapt up in the nice observanceof trifles, correcting others, if the object of their supplicationsembraced anything within a whole hemisphere of heresy, and not so muchhappy because he thought himself the way of salvation, as because hethought others out of it--a consideration which sent pleasure tinglingto his fingers' ends. 

But notwithstanding all this, I noticed, through the gloom of the place, many who were actuated by genuine, unaffected piety, from whom charityand kindness beamed forth through all the disadvantages around them. Such people, for the most part, prayed in silence and alone. WheneverI saw a man or woman anxious to turn away their faces, and separatethemselves from the flocks of gregarious babblers, I seldom failed towitness the outpouring of a contrite spirit. I have certainly seen, inseveral instances, the tear of heartfelt repentance bedew the sinner'scheek. I observed one peculiarly interesting female who struck mevery much. In personal beauty she was very lovely--her form perfectlysymmetrical, and she evidently belonged to rather a better order ofsociety. Her dress was plain, though her garments were by no meanscommon. She could scarcely be twenty, and yet her face told a tale ofsorrow, of deep, wasting, desolating sorrow. As the prayers, hymns, andreligious conversations which wont on, were peculiar to the place, time, and occasion--it being near the hour of rest:--she probably did notfeel that reluctance in going to pray in presence of so many which sheotherwise would have felt. She kept her eye on a certain female who hada remote dusky corner to pray in, and the moment she retired from it, this young creature went up and there knelt down. But what a contrast tothe calm, unconscious, and insipid mummery which went on at the momentthrough the whole room! Her prayer was short, and she had neither booknor beads; but the heavings of her bosom, and her suppressed sobs, sufficiently proclaimed her sincerity. Her petition, indeed, seemed togo to heaven from a broken heart. When it was finished, she remained afew moments on her knees, and dried her eyes with her handkerchief. Asshe rose up, I could mark the modest, timid glance, and the slightblush as she presented herself again amongst the company, where all werestrangers. I thought she appeared, though in the midst of such a number, to be woefully and pitiably alone. 

As for my own companion, she absolutely made the grand tour of all thepraying knots on the promises, having taken a very tolerable bout witheach. There were two qualities in which she shone preeminent--voice anddistinctness; for she gave by far the loudest and most monotonous chant. Her visage also was remarkable, for her complexion resembled the dark, dingy red of a winter apple. She had a pair of very piercing black eyes, with which, while kneeling with her body thrown back upon her heels asif they were a cushion, she scrutinized, at her ease, every one in theroom, rocking herself gently from side to side. The poor creature paida marked attention to the interesting young woman I have just mentioned. At last, they dropped off one by one to bed, that they might be up earlythe next morning for the Lough, with the exception of some half-dozen, more long-winded than the rest whose voices I could hear at their sixthrosary, in the rapid elevated tone peculiar to Catholic devotion, untilI fell asleep. 

The next morning, when I awoke, I joined with all haste the aggregatecrowd that proceeded in masses towards the lake--or Purgatory--whichlies amongst the hills that extend to the north-east of Petigo. Whileascending the bleak, hideous mountain range, whose ridge commands a fullview of this celebrated scene of superstition, the manner and appearanceof the pilgrims were deeply interesting. Such groupings as pressedforward around me would have made line studies either for him who wishedto deplore or to ridicule the degradations and absurdities of humannature; indeed there was an intense interest in the scene. I lookback at this moment with awe towards the tremulous and high-strainedvibrations of my mind, as it responded to the excitement. Reader, haveyou ever approached the Eternal City? have you ever, from the drearysolitudes of the Campagna, seen the dome of St. Peter's for the firsttime? and have the monuments of the greatest men and the mightiest deedsthat ever the earth witnessed--have the names of the Caesars, and theCatos, and the Scipios, excited a curiosity amounting to a sensationalmost too intense to be borne? I think I can venture to measure theexpansion of your mind, as it enlarged itself before the crowdingvisions of the past, as the dim grandeur of ages rose up and developeditself from amidst the shadows of time; and entranced amidst the magicof your own associations, you desired to stop--you were almost contentto go no farther--your own Rome, you were in the midst of--Romefree--Rome triumphant--Rome classical. And perhaps it is well youawoke in good time from your shadowy dream, to escape from the unvarieddesolation and the wasting malaria that brooded all around. Reader, Ican fancy that such might have been your sensations when the domesand the spires of the world's capital first met your vision; and I canassure you, that while ascending the ridge that was to give me a view ofPatrick's Purgatory, my sensations were as impressively, as powerfullyexcited. For I desire you to recollect, that the welfare of yourimmortal soul was not connected with your imaginings, your magnificentvisions did not penetrate into the soul's doom. You were not submittedto the agency, of a transcendental power. You were, in a word, a poet, but not a fanatic. What comparison, then, could there be between theexercise of your free, manly, cultivated understanding, and my feelingson this occasion, with my thick-coming visions of immortality, thatalmost lifted me from the mountain-path I was ascending, and brought me, as it were, into contact with the invisible world? I repeat it, then, that such were my feelings, when all the faculties which exist in themind were aroused and concentrated upon one object. In such a case, the pilgrim stands, as it were, between life and death; and as it wassuperstition that placed him there, she certainly conjures up to hisheated fancy those dark, fleeting, and indistinct images which areadjusted to that gloom which she has already cast over his mind. Although there could not be less than two hundred people, young and old, boys and girls, men and women, the hale and the sickly, the blind andthe lame, all climbing to gain the top with as little delay as possible, yet was there scarcely a sound, certainly not a word, to be heard amongthem. For my part, I plainly heard the palpitations of my heart, bothloud and quick. Had I been told that the veil of eternity was aboutto be raised before me at that moment, I could scarcely have felt moreintensely. Several females were obliged to rest for some time, in orderto gain both physical and moral strength--one fainted; and several oldmen were obliged to sit down. All were praying, every crucifix was out, every bead in requisition; and nothing broke a silence so solemn but alow, monotonous murmur of deep devotion. 

As soon as we ascended the hill, the whole scene was instantly beforeus: a large lake, surrounded by an amphitheatre of mountains, bleak, uncomfortable, and desolate. In the lake itself, about half a mile fromthe edge next us, was to be seen the "Island, " with two or three slatedhouses on it, naked and un-plastered, as desolate-looking almost as themountains. A little range of exceeding low hovels, which a dwarf couldscarcely enter without stooping, appeared to the left; and the eye couldrest on nothing more, except a living mass of human beings crawlingslowly about. The first thing the pilgrim does when he gets a sight ofthe lake, is to prostrate himself, kiss the earth, and then on hisknees offer up three Paters and Aves, and a Creed for the favor of beingpermitted to see this blessed place. When this is over, he descends tothe lake, and after paying tenpence to the ferry-man, is rowed over tothe Purgatory. 

When the whole view was presented to me, I stood for some time tocontemplate it; I cannot better illustrate the reaction which, tookplace in my mind, than by saying that it resembles that awkwardinversion which a man's proper body experiences when, on going to pullsomething from which he expects a marvellous assistance, it comes withhim at a touch, and the natural consequence is, that he finds his headdown and his heels up. That which dashed the whole scene from thedark elevation in which the romance of devotion had placed it was theappearance of slated houses, and of the smoke that curled from thehovels and the prior's residence. This at once brought me back tohumanity: and the idea of roasting meat, boiling pots, and dressingdinners, dispossessed every fine and fearful image which had floatedthrough my imagination for the last twelve hours. In fact, allowing forthe difference of situation, it nearly resembled John's Well, or James'sFair, when beheld at a distance, turning the slated houses into inns, and the hovels into tents. A certain idea, slight, untraceable, andinvoluntary, went over my brain on that occasion, which, though it didnot then cost me a single effort of reflection, I think was revivedand developed at a future period of my life, and became, perhaps to acertain extent, the means of opening a wider range of thought to mymind, and of giving a new tone to my existence. Still, however, nothing except my idea of its external appearance disappointed, me; Iaccordingly ascended with the rest, and in a short time found myselfamong the living mass upon the island. 

The first thing I did was to hand over my three cakes of oaten breadwhich I had got made in Petigo, tied up in a handkerchief, as well asmy hat and second shirt, to the care of the owner of one of the, huts:having first, by the way, undergone a second prostration on touching theisland, and greeted it with fifteen holy kisses, and another stringof prayers. I then, according to the regulations, should commence thestations, lacerated as my feet were after so long a journey; so that Ihad not a moment to rest. Think, therefore, what I must have suffered, on surrounding a large chapel, in the direction of from east to west, over a pavement of stone spikes, every one of them making its way alongmy nerves and muscles to my unfortunate brain. I was absolutely stupidand dizzy with the pain, the praying, the jostling, the elbowing, thescrambling and the uncomfortable penitential murmurs of the whole crowd. I knew not what I was about, but went through the forms in the samemechanical spirit which pervaded all present. As for that solemn, humble, and heartfelt sense of God's presence, which Christian prayerdemands, its existence in the mind would not only be a moral buta physical impossibility in Lough Derg. I verily think that ifmortification of the body, without conversion of the life or heart--ifpenance and not repentance could save the soul, no wretch who performeda pilgrimage here could with a good grace be damned. Out of hell theplace is matchless, and if there be a purgatory in the other world, itmay very well be said there is a fair rehearsal of it in the county ofDonegal in Ireland. 

When I commenced my station, I started from what is called the "Beds, "and God help St. Patrick if he lay upon them: they are sharp stonesplaced circularly in the earth, with the spike ends of them up, onecircle within another; and the manner in which the pilgrim gets as faras the innermost, resembles precisely that in which school-boys enterthe "Walls of Troy" upon their slates. I moved away from these uponthe sharp stones with which the whole island is surfaced, keeping thechapel, or "Prison, " as it is called, upon my right; then turning, Icame round again with a circumbendibus, to the spot from which Iset out. During this circuit, as well as I can remember, I repeatedfifty-five paters and aves, and five creeds, or five decades; and be itknown, that the fifty prayers were offered up to the Virgin Mary, andthe odd five to God! I then commenced getting round the eternal beds, during which I repeated, I think, fifteen paters and aves more; and asthe bods decreased in circumference, the prayers decreased in length, until a short circuit and three paters and aves finished the last andinnermost of these blessed couches. I really forgot how many times eachday the prison and these beds are to be surrounded, and how many hundredprayers are to be repeated during the circuit, though each circuit is infact making the grand tour of the island; but I never shall forget thatI was the best part of a July day at it, when the soles of my feet wereflayed, and the stones hot enough to broil a beefsteak! When the firstday's station was over, it is necessary to say that a little rest wouldhave been agreeable? But no, this would not suit the policy of theplace; here it may be truly said that there is no rest for the wicked. The only luxury allowed me was the privilege of feasting upon one of mycakes (having not tasted food that blessed day until then); upon one ofmy cakes, I say, and a copious supply of the water of the lake, which, to render the repast more agreeable, was made lukewarm! This was to keepmy spirits up after the delicate day's labor I had gone through, and tocheer me against the pleasant prospect of a hard night's praying withoutsleep, which lay in the back ground! But when I saw everyone at thisrefreshing meal with a good, thick, substantial bannock, and then lookedat the immateriality of my own, I could not help reverting to the womanwho made them for me, with a degree of vivacity not altogether in unisonwith the charity of a Christian. The knavish creature defrauded me ofone-half of the oatmeal, although I had purchased it myself in Petigofor the occasion; being determined that as I was only to get two mealsin the three days, they should be such as a person could fast upon. Never was there a man more bitterly disappointed; for they were notthicker than crown-pieces, and I searched for them in my mouth to nopurpose--the only thing like substance I could feel there was the warmwater. At last, night came; but here to describe the horrors of what Isuffered I hold myself utterly inadequate. I was wedged in a shake-downbed with seven others, one of whom was a Scotch Papist--another a manwith a shrunk leg, who wore a crutch--all afflicted with that diseasewhich northern men that feed on oatmeal are liable to; and then theswarms that fell upon my poor young skin, and probed, and stung, andfed on me! it was pressure and persecution almost insupportable, and yetsuch was my fatigue that sleep even here began to weigh down my eyelids. 

I was just on the point of enjoying a little rest, when a man ringinga large hand-bell, came round crying out in a low, supernatural growl, which could be heard double the distance of the loudest shout--"Wakenup, waken up, and come to the prison!" The words were no sooner out ofhis mouth, than there was a sudden start, and a general scramble in thedark for our respective garments. When we got dressed, we proceeded tothe waters of the lake, in which we washed our face and hands, repeatingprayers during the ablution. This to me was the most impressive andagreeable part of the whole station. The night, while we were in bed, or rather in torture, had become quite stormy, and the waves of the lakebeat against the shore with the violence of an agitated sea. There wasjust sufficient moon to make the "darkness visible, " and to show theblack clouds drifting with rapid confusion, in broken masses, over ourheads. This, joined to the tossing of the billows against the shore--thedark silent groups that came, like shadows, stooping for a moment overthe surface of the waters, and retreating again in a manner which theseverity of the night rendered necessarily quick, raising thereby in themind the idea of gliding spirits--then the preconceived desolationof the surrounding scenery--the indistinct shadowy chain of drearymountains which, faintly relieved by the lurid sky, hemmed in thelake--the silence of the forms, contrasted with the tumult of theelements about us--the loneliness of the place--its isolation andremoteness from the habitations of men--all this put together, joinedto the feeling of deep devotion in which I was wrapped, had really asublime effect upon me. Upon the generality of those who were there, blind to the natural beauty and effect of the hour and the place, andviewing it only through the medium of superstitious awe, it was indeedcalculated to produce the notion of something not belonging to thecircumstance and reality of human life. 

From this scene we passed to one, which, though not characterized by itsdark, awful beauty, was scarcely inferior to it in effect. It was calledthe "Prison, " and it is necessary to observe here, that every pilgrimmust pass twenty-four hours in this place, kneeling, without food orsleep, although one meal of bread and warm water, and whatever sleep hecould get in Petigo with seven in a bed, were his allowance of food andsleep during the twenty-four hours previous. I must here beg the goodreader's attention for a moment, with, reference to our penance in the"Prison. " Let us consider how the nature of this pilgrimage: it must beperformed on foot, no matter what the distance of residence (allowingfor voyages)--the condition of life--the age or the sex of the pilgrimmay be. Individuals from France, from America, England, and Scotland, visit it--as voluntary devotees, or to perform an act of penance forsome great crime, or perhaps to atone for a bad life in general. It isperformed, too, in the dead heat of summer, when labor is slack, and thelower orders have sufficient leisure to undertake it; and, I may add, when travelling on foot is most fatiguing; they arrive, therefore, without a single exception, blown and jaded almost to death. The firstthing they do, notwithstanding this, is to commence the fresh rigors ofthe station, which occupies them several hours. This consists in whatI have already described, viz. , the pleasant promenade upon the stonyspikes around the prison and the "beds;" that over, they take theirfirst and only meal for the day; after which, as in my own case justrelated, they must huddle themselves in clusters, on what is barefacedlycalled a bed, but which is nothing more nor less than a beggarman'sshakedown, where the smell, the heat, the filth, and above all, thevermin, are intolerable to the very farthest stretch of the superlativedegree. As soon as their eyes begin to close here, they are rousedby the bell-man, and summoned at the hour of twelve--first washingthemselves as aforesaid, in the lake, and then adjourning to the prisonwhich I am about to describe. There is not on earth, with the exceptionof pagan rites, --and it is melancholy to be compelled to compare anyinstitution of the Christian religion with a Juggernaut, --there is noton earth, I say, a regulation of a religious nature, more barbarousand inhuman than this. It has destroyed thousands since itsestablishment--has left children without parents, and parents childless. It has made wives widows, and torn from the disconsolate husband themother of his children; and is itself the monster which St. Patrick issaid to have destroyed in the place--a monster, which is a complete andsignificant allegory of this great and destructive superstition. But what is even worse than death, by stretching the powers of humansufferance until the mind cracks under them, it is said sometimesto return these pitiable creatures maniacs--exulting in the laughof madness, or sunk for ever in the incurable apathy of religiousmelancholy. I mention this now, to exhibit the purpose for which thesecalamities are turned to account, and the dishonesty which isexercised over these poor, unsuspecting people, in consequence of theiroccurrence. The pilgrims, being thus aroused at midnight are sent toprison; and what think you is the impression under which they enter it?one indeed, which, when we consider their bodily weakness and mentalexcitement, must do its work with success. It is this: that as soon asthey enter the prison a supernatural tendency to sleep will come overthem, which, they say, is peculiar to the place; that this is an emblemof the influence of sin over the soul, and a type of their future fate;that if they resist this they will be saved; but if they yield to it, they will not only be damned in the next world, but will go mad, orincur some immediate and dreadful calamity in this. Is it any wonderthat a weak mind and exhausted body, wrought upon by these bugbears, should induce upon by itself, by its own terrors, the malady ofderangement? We know that nothing acts so strongly and so fatally uponreason, as an imagination diseased by religious terrors: and I regretto say, that I had upon that night an opportunity of witnessing a fatalinstance of it. 

After having washed ourselves in the dark waters of the lake, we enteredthis famous prison, which is only a naked, unplastered chapel, withan altar against one of the sides and two galleries. On entering thisplace, a scene presented itself altogether unparalleled on the earth, and in every point of view capable to sustain the feelings raised in themind by the midnight scenery of the lake as seen during the ablutions. The prison was full, but not crowded; for had it been crowded, we wouldhave been happy. It was, however, just sufficiently filled to give everyindividual the pleasure of sustaining himself, without having it in hispower to recline for a moment in an attitude of rest, or to change thatmost insupportable of all bodily suffering, uniformity of position. There we knelt upon a hard ground floor, and commenced praying; andagain I must advert to the policy which prevails in this island. During the period of imprisonment, there are no prescribed prayers norceremonies whatever to be performed, and this is the more strange, asevery other stage of the station has its proper devotions. But these aresuspended here, lest the attention of the prisoners might be fixed onany particular object, and the supernatural character of drowsinessimputed to the place be thus doubted--they are, therefore, turned inwithout anything to excite them to attention or to resist the propensityto sleep occasioned by their fatigue and want of rest Having thusnothing to do, nothing to sustain, nothing to stimulate them, it is verynatural that they should, even if unexhausted by previous lassitude, beinclined to sleep; but everything that can weigh them down is laid uponthem in this heavy and oppressive superstition, that the strong delusionmay be kept up. 

On entering the prison, I was struck with the dim religious twilightof the place. Two candles gleamed faintly from the altar, and there wassomething I thought of a deadly light about them, as they burned feeblyand stilly against the darkness which hung over the other part of thebuilding. Two priests, facing the congregation, stood upon the altar insilence, with pale spectral visages, their eyes catching an unearthlyglare from the sepulchral light of the slender tapers. But that whichwas strangest of all, and, as I said before, without a parallel inthis world, was the impression and effect produced by the deep, drowsy, hollow, hoarse, guttural, ceaseless, and monotonous hum, which proceededfrom about four hundred individuals, half asleep and at prayer; fortheir cadences were blended and slurred into each other, as theyrepeated, in an awe-struck and earnest undertone, the prayers in whichthey were engaged. It was certainly the strangest sound I ever heard, and resembled a thousand subterraneous groans, uttered in a kind of low, deep, unvaried chant. Nothing could produce a sense of gloomy alarm ina weak superstitious mind equal to this; and it derived much of its wildand singular character, as well as of its lethargic influence, from itscontinuity; for it still--still rung lowly and supernaturally on my ear. Perhaps the deep, wavy prolongation of the bass of a large cathedralbell, or that low, continuous sound, which is distinct from its higherand louder intonations, would give a faint notion of it, yet only afaint one; for the body of hoarse monotony here was immense. Indeed, such a noise had something so powerfully lulling, that human nature, even excited by the terrible suggestions of superstitious fear, wasscarcely able to withstand it. 

Now the poor pilgrims forget, that this strong disposition to sleeparises from the weariness produced by their long journeys--by theexhausting penance of the station, performed without giving them timeto rest--by the other still more natural consequence of not givingthem time to sleep--by the drowsy darkness of the chapel--and by theheaviness caught from the low peculiar murmur of the pilgrims, whichwould of itself overcome the lightest spirit. I was here but a veryshort time when I began to doze, and just as my chin was sinkingplacidly on my breast, and the words of an Ave Maria dying upon mylips, I felt the charm all at once broken by a well-meant rap upon theocciput, conferred through the instrumentality of a little angry-lookingsquat urchin of sixty years, and a remarkably good black-thorn cudgel, with which he was engaged in thwacking the heads of such sinners, as, not having the dread of insanity and the regulations of the place beforetheir eyes, were inclined to sleep. I declare the knock I receivedtold to such a purpose on my head, that nothing occurred during thepilgrimage that vexed me so much. 

After all, I really slept the better half of the night; yet soindescribably powerful was the apprehension of derangement, that myhypocritical tongue wagged aloud at the prayers, during these furtivenaps. Nay, I not only slept but dreamed. I experienced also thatsingular state of being, in which, while the senses are accessibleto the influence of surrounding objects, the process of thought issuspended, the man seems to enjoy an inverted existence, in which thesoul sleeps, and the body remains awake and susceptible of externalimpressions. I once thought I was washing myself in the lake, and thatthe dashing noise of its waters rang in my ears: I also fancied myselfat home in conversation with my friends; yet, in neither case, did Ialtogether forget where I was. Still in struggling to bring my mindback, so paramount was the dread of awaking deranged should I fallasleep, that these occasional visions--associating themselves with thisterror--and this again broken in upon by the hoarse murmurs about me, throwing their dark shades on every object that passed my imagination, the force of reason being too vague at the moment; these occasionalvisions I say, and this jumbling together of broken images anddisjointed thoughts, had such an effect upon me, that I imagined severaltimes that the awful penalty was exacted, and that my reason was gonefor ever. I frequently started, and on seeing two dim lights upon thealtar, and on hearing the ceaseless and eternal murmurs going on--goingon--around me, without being immediately able to ascribe them to theirproper cause, I set myself down as a lost man; for on that terror Iwas provokingly clear during the whole night. I more than once gave aninvoluntary groan or shriek, on finding myself in this singular state;so did many others, and these groans and shrieks were wildly andfearfully contrasted with the never-ending hum, which, like theceaseless noise of a distant waterfall, went on during the night. Theperspiration occasioned by this inconceivable distress, by the heat ofthe place, and by the unchangeableness of my position, flowed profuselyfrom every core. About two o'clock in the morning an unhappy young man, either in a state of lethargic indifference, or under the influenceof these sudden paroxysms, threw himself, or fell from one of thegalleries, and was so shattered by the fall that he died next day attwelve o'clock, --and, what was not much to the credit of the clergymenon the island--without the benefit of the clergy; for I saw a priestwith his stole and box of chrism finishing off his extreme unction whenhe was quite dead. This is frequently done in the Church of Rome, undera hope that life may not be utterly extinct, and that consequently thefinal separation of the soul and body may not have taken place. 

In this prison, during the night, several persons go about with rods andstaves, rapping those on the head whom they see heavy; snuff-boxesalso go around very freely, elbows are jogged, chins chucked, and earstwitched, for the purpose of keeping each other awake. The rods andstaves are frequently changed from hand to hand, and I thought it wouldbe a lucky job if I could get one for a little, to enable me to changemy position. I accordingly asked a man who had been a long time bangingin this manner, if he would allow me to take his place for some time, and he was civil enough to do so. I therefore set out on my travelsthrough the prison, rapping about me at a great rate, and withremarkable effect; for, whatever was the cause of it, I perceived thatnot a soul seemed the least inclined to doze after a visit from me; onthe contrary, I observed several to scratch their heads, giving me atthe same time significant looks of very sincere thankfulness. 

But what I am convinced was the most meritorious act of my wholepilgrimage, as it was certainly the most zealously performed, was aremembrance I gave the squat fellow, who visited me in the early partof the night. He was engaged, tooth and nail, with another man, at a _DeProfundis_, and although not asleep at the time, yet on the principlethat prevention is better than cure, I thought it more prudent tolet him have his rap before the occasion for it might come on: heaccordingly got full payment, at compound interest, for the villanousknock he had lent me before. 

This employment stirred my blood a little, and I got much lighter. Icould now pay some attention to the scene about me, and the first objectthat engaged it was a fellow with a hare-lip, who had completely takenthe lead at prayer. The organs of speech seemed to have been transferredfrom his mouth to his nose, and, although Irish was his vernacularlanguage, either some fool or knave had taught him to say his prayers inEnglish: and you may take this as an observation founded on fact, that the language which a Roman Catholic of the lower class does notunderstand, is the one in which it is disposed to pray. As for him hehad lots of English prayers, though he was totally ignorant of thatlanguage. The twang from the nose, the loud and rapid tone in which hespoke, and the malaproprian happiness with which he travestied everyprayer he uttered, would have compelled any man to smile. The priestslaughed outright before the whole congregation, particularly one ofthem, whom I well knew; the other turned his face towards the altar, andleaning over a silver pix, in which, according to their own tenets, theRedeemer of the world must have been at that moment, as it containedthe consecrated wafers, gave full vent to his risibility. Now it isremarkable that no one present attached the slightest impropriety tothis--I for one did not; although it certainly occurred to me with fullforce at a subsequent period. 

When morning came, the blessed light of the sun broke the leaden charmof the prison, and infused into us a wonderful portion of fresh vigor. This day being the second from our arrival, we had our second station toperform, and consequently all the sharp spikes to re-traverse. We werenot permitted at all to taste food during these twenty-four hours, sothat our weakness was really very great. I beg leave, however, to returnmy special acknowledgments for the truly hospitable allowance of winewith which I, in common with every other pilgrim, was treated. Thiswine is made by filling a large pot with the lake water, and making itlukewarm. It is then handed round in jugs and wooden noggins--to theircredit be it recorded--in the greatest possible abundance. On this aloneI breakfasted, dined, and supped, during the second or prison day of mypilgrimage. 

At twelve o'clock that night we left prison, and made room for anothersquadron, who gave us their kennels. Such a luxury was sleep to me, however, that I felt not the slightest inconvenience from the vermin, though I certainly made a point to avoid the Scotchman and the cripple. On the following day I confessed; and never was an unfortunate soul sogrievously afflicted with a bad memory as I was on that occasion--thewhole thing altogether, but particularly the prison scene, had knockedme up, I could not therefore remember a tithe of my sins; and thepriest, poor man, had really so much to do, and was in such a hurry, that he had me clean absolved before I had got half through the preface, or knew what I was about. I then went with a fresh batch to receive thesacrament, which I did from the hands of the good-natured gentleman whoenjoyed so richly the praying talents of the hare-lipped devotee in theprison. 

I cannot avoid mentioning here a practice peculiar to Roman Catholics, which consists in an exchange of one or more prayers, by a stipulationbetween two persons: I offer up a pater and ave for you, and youagain for me. It is called swapping or exchanging prayers. After I hadreceived the sacrament, I observed a thin, sallow little man, with apair of beads, as long as himself, moving from knot to knot, but neverremaining long in the same place. At last he glided up to me, and in awhisper asked me if I knew him. I answered in the negative. "Oh, then, alanna, ye war never here before?" "Never. " "Oh, I see that, acushla, youwould a known me if you had: well then, did ye never hear of Sol Donnel, the pilgrim?"

"I never did, " I replied, "but are we not all pilgrims while here?"

"To be sure, aroon, but I'm a pilgrim every place else, you see, as wellas here, my darlin' sweet young man. "

"Then you're a pilgrim by profession?"

"That's it, asthore machree; everybody that comes here the second time, sure, knows Sol Donnel, the blessed pilgrim. "

"In that case it was impossible for me to know you, as I was-never herebefore. "

"Acushla, I know that, but a good beginnin' are ye makin' of it--an' atyour time of life too; but, avick, it must prosper wid ye, comin' here Imane. "

"I hope it may. " "Well yer parents isn't both livin' it's likely?""No. " "Aye! but yell jist not forget that same, ye see; I b'lieve I sedso--your father dead, I suppose?" "No, my mother. " "Your mother; well, avick, I didn't say that for a sartinty; but still, you see, avourneen, maybe somebody could a tould ye it was the mother, forhaps, aftherall. " "Did you know them?" I asked. "You see, a lanna, I can't say that, without first hearin' their names. " "My name is B------. " "An' a dacentbearable name it is, darlin'. Is yer father of them da-cent people, theB------s of Newtownlimavady, ahagur!" "Not that I know of. " "Oh, well, well, it makes no maxim between you an' me, at all, at all; but the Lordmark you to grace, any how; it's a dacent name sure enough, only if yermother was livin', it's herself 'ud be the proud woman, an' well shemight, to see such a clane, promisin' son steppin' home to her fromLough Derg. " "Indeed I'm obliged to you, " said I; "I protest I'm obligedto you, for your good opinion of me. " "It's nothin' but what ye desarve, avick! an' more nor that--yer the makin's of a clargy I'm guessin'?" "Iam, " said I, "surely designed for that. " "Oh, I knew it, I knew it, it's in your face; you've the sogarth in yer very face; an' well will yebecome the robes when ye get them on ye: sure, an' to tell you the truth(in a whisper, stretching up his mouth to my ear), I feel my heart warmtowardst you, somehow. " "I declare I feel much the same towards you, "I returned, for the fellow in spite of me was gaining upon my goodopinion; "you are a decent, civil soul. " "An' for that raison, and foryour dacent mother's sake (_sobies-coat inpassy, amin_), (* Requiescatin pace. ) I'll jist here offer up the _gray profungus_ (* De profundis)for the release of her sowl out o' the burning flames of pur-gathur. " Ireally could not help shuddering at this. He then repeated a psalm forthat purpose, the 130th in our Bible, but the 129th in theirs. When itwas finished, with all due gesticulation, that is to say, having thumpedhis breast with great violence, kissed the ground, and crossed himselfrepeatedly, he says to me, like a man confident that he had paved hisway to my good graces, "Now, avick, as we _did_ do so much, you're thevery darlin' young man that I won't lave, widout the best, maybe, that'sto come yet, ye see; bekase I'll swap a prayer wid you, this blessedminute. " "I'm very glad you mentioned it, " said I. "But you don't know, maybe, darlin', that I'm undher five ordhers. " "Dear me! is it possibleyou're under so many?" "Undher five ordhers, acushla!"--"Well, " Ireplied, "I am ready. "--"Undher five ordhers--but I'll lave it toyourself; only when it's over, maybe, ye'll hear somethin' from methat'll make you thankful you ever gave me silver any way. "

By this time I saw his drift: but he really had managed his point sodexterously--not forgetting the De profundis--that I gave him tenpencein silver: he pocketed it with great alacrity, and was at the prayerin a twinkling, which he did offer up in prime, style--five paters, fiveaves, and a creed, whilst I set the same number to his credit. When wehad finished, he made me kneel down to receive his blessing, which hegave in great form:--"Now, " said he, in a low, important tone, "I'mgoin' to show you a thing that'll make you bless the born day you everseen my face; and it's this--did ye ever hear of the blessed ThirtyDays' Prayer?"* "I can't say I did. " "Well, avick, in good time still;but there's a blessed book, if you can get it, that has a prayer in it, named the Thirty Bays' Prayer, an' if ye jist repate that same, everyday for thirty days fastin', there's no request ye'll ax from heaven, good, bad, or indifferent, but ye'll get. And now do you begrudgegivin'me what I got?" "Not a bit, " said I, "and I'll certainly lookfor the book. " "No, no, the darlin' fine young man, " soliloquizingaloud--"Well and well did I know you wouldn't, nor another along widit--sensible and learned as ye are, to know the blessed worth of whatye got for it; not makin', at the same time, any comparishment at all atall atween it and the dirty thrash of riches of this earth, that everywan has their heart fixed upon--exceptin' them that the Lord gives thelarnin' an' the edication to, to know betther. "

 * There is such a prayer, and I have often seen it in Catholic Prayer-books. 

Oh, flattery! flattery! and a touch of hypocrisy on my part! Between ye, did ye make another lodgment on my purse, which was instantly lightenedby an additional bank token, value tenpence, handed over to thissugar-tongued old knave. When he Pocketed this, he shook me cordiallyby the band, bidding me "not to forgit the Thirty Days' Prayer, at anyrate. " He then glided off with his small, sallow face, stuck between hislittle shrugged shoulders, fingering his beads, and praying audibly withgreat apparent fervor, whilst his little keen eye was reconnoitering foranother pigeon. In the course of a few minutes, I saw him lead a large, soft, warm-looking, countryman, over to a remote corner, and enter intoan earnest conversation with him, which, I could perceive, ended bytheir both kneeling down, I suppose, to swap a prayer; and I have nodoubt but he lightened the honest countryman's purse, as well as mine. 

On the third day I was determined, if possible, to leave it early; soI performed my third and last station round the chapel and the beds, reduced to such a state of weakness and hunger, that the coats of mystomach must have been rubbing against each other; my feet were quiteshapeless. I therefore made the shortest circuit and the longest stridespossible, until I finished it. 

I witnessed this day, immediately before my departure from this gloomyand truly purgatorial settlement, a scene of some interest. A priest wasstanding before the door of the dwelling-house, giving tickets to suchas were about to confess, this being a necessary point. When he haddespatched them all, I saw an old man and his son approach him, the manseemingly sixty, the boy about fourteen. They had a look of peculiardecency, but were thin and emaciated, even beyond what the rigor oftheir penance here could produce. The youth tottered with weakness, andthe old man supported him with much difficulty. It is right to mentionhere, that this pilgrimage was performed in a season when sickness andfamine prevailed fearfully in this kingdom. They advanced up to thepriest to pay their money on receiving the tickets; he extended his palmfrom habit, but did not speak. The old man had some silver in his hand;and as he was about to give it to the priest, I saw the child look upbeseechingly in his father's face, whilst an additional paleness cameover his own, and his eyes filled with tears. The father saw and feltthe appeal of the child, and hesitated; the priest's arm was stillextended, his hand open:--"Would you, sir, " said the old man, addressingthe priest, "be good enough to hear a word from me?" "For what?" repliedthe priest, in a sharp tone. "Why, sir, " answered the old man, "I amvery much distressed. " "Ay--it is the common story! Come, pay the money;don't you see I've no time to lose?" "I won't detain you a minute, sir, "said the man; "this child"----"You want to keep the money, then? that'syour object; down with it on the instant, and begone. "

The old man dropped it into the priest's hand, in a kind of start, produced by the stern tone of voice in which he was addressed. When thepriest got the money he seemed in a better humor, not wishing, I couldsee, to send the man away with a bad impression of him. "Well, nowwhat's that you were going to say to me?" "Why, sir, " resumed the oldman, "that I have not a penny in my possession behind what I have justnow put into your hand--not the price of a morsel for this child ormyself, although we have forty miles to travel!" "Well, and how am I toremedy that? What brought you here, if you had not what would bear yourexpenses?" "I had, sir, on setting out; but my little boy was fivedays sick in Petigo, and that took away with it what we had to carryus home. " "And you expect me, in short, to furnish you with money to dothat? Do you think, my good man, there are not paupers in my own parish, that have a better right to assistance than you have!" "I do not doubtit, sir, " said he, "I do not doubt it; and as for myself I could crawlhome upon anything; but what is this child to do? he is already sinkingwith hunger and--" The poor man's utterance here failed him as he casthis eyes on the poor, pale boy. When he had recovered himself a little, he proceeded:-- "He is all that it has pleased God to leave to hisafflicted mother and me, out of seven of them. His other brother andsister and him were all we had living for some years; they are sevenweeks dead yesterday, of the fever; and when he was given over, sir, hismother and I vowed, that if God would spare him to us, either she orI would bring him to the 'Island, ' as soon as he would be able for thejourney. He was but weakly settin' out, and we had no notion that thestation was so tryin' as it is: it has nearly overcome my child, and howhe will be able to walk forty miles in this weak, sickly state, God onlyknows?" "Oh! sir, " said the boy, "my poor father is worse off and weakerthan I am, and he is sick too, sir; I am only weak, but not sick; butmy poor father's both weak and sick, " said he, his tears streaming fromhim, as he pressed his father's arm to his breast--"my poor father isboth weak and. Sick, ay, and hungry too, " said he. "Take this, " said thepriest, "it is as much as I can afford to give you, " putting a silverfivepenny-piece into his hand; "there's a great deal of poor in my ownparish. " "Alas I thought, you are not a father. Indeed, sir, " said thepoor man, "I thought you would have allowed me to keep the silver I gaveyou, as how can we travel two-and-forty miles on this?" "I tell you, my good man, " said the priest, resuming a sterner tone, "I have done asmuch for you as I can afford: and if every one gives you as much, youwon't be ill off. "

The tears stood in the old man's eyes, as he fixed them hopelessly uponhis boy whilst the child looked ravenously at the money, trifling as itwas, and seemed to think of nothing except getting the worth of it offood. As they left the priest, "Oh, come, come father, " said the littlefellow, "come and let us get something to eat. " "Easy, dear, till I drawmy breath a little, for, John I am weak; but the Lord is strong, andwill bring us home, if we put our trust in him; for if he's not moremerciful to his poor creatures, than some that acts in his name here, John, we would have a bad chance. " They here sat down on the ledge ofa rock, a few yards from the chapel, and I still remained bound to thespot by the interest I felt in what I had just witnessed. "What do youwant, sir, " said the priest to me; "did you get your ticket?" "I did, sir, " I replied; "but I hope you will permit me to become an advocatefor that poor man and his son, as I think their case is one in whichlife and death are probably concerned!" "Really, my good young man, youmay spare your advocacy, I'm not to be duped with such tales as you'veheard. " "By the tale, sir, if tale you call it, " I returned, "which thefather told, I think, any man might be guided in his charity; but reallyI think the most pitiful story was to be read in their faces. " "Doyou think so? Well, if that's your opinion, I'm sure you have a fairopportunity of being charitable; as for me, I have no more time tolose with either you or them, " said he, going into a comfortable house, whilst I could have fairly seen him up to the neck in the blessedelement about us. I here stepped over, and instantly desired the old manto hand me the fivepence, telling him at the same time that therewas something better in prospect, as a proof of which I gave himhalf-a-crown. I then returned to the priest, and laid his fivepence downon the table before him; for I had the generosity, the fire, and thecandor of youth about me, unrepressed by the hardening experience oflife. "What's this, sir?" said he. "Your money, sir, " I replied--"itis such a very trifle, that it would be of no service to them, and theywill be enabled to go home without it; the old man returns it. " "That isas much as to say, " he replied, sarcastically, "that you will patronizethem yourself; I wish you joy of it. Was it to witness the distresses ofothers that you came to the island, let me ask?" "Perhaps I came from aworse motive, " I returned. "I haven't the least doubt of it, " said he;"but move off--one word of insolence more, " said he, stretching to acutting whip, for the use of which he was deservedly famous. "I will cutyou up, sirrah, while I'm able to stand over you. " "Upon my word, " saidI, extending my feet one after another, "you have cut me up prettywell already, I think; but, " I added, with coolness, "is that, sir, theweapon of a Christian?" "Is it the weapon of a Christian, sir? whateverweapon it is, you will soon feel the weight of it, " said he, brandishingit over my head. "My good father, " said I, "do you remember, sincenothing else will restrain you, that the laws of the country will notrecognize such horsewhip Christianity?" "The laws of the country. Oh, God help it for a country! Yes! yes! excellent. Here Michael--I say, come here--drive out this follow. I'll be calm; I'll not, put myself ina passion--out with him! this fellow. " On turning round to contemplatethe person spoken to, we recognized each other as slight aquaintances. "Bless me, " said he, "what's the matter? Why, " he added, addressing me, "what's this?" "How? do you know him, Michael?" "Tut, I do--isn't hefor the mission?" "Oh--ho!--is that it? well, I'm glad I know so much;good-bye to you, for the present; never fear but I'll keep my eye uponyou. " So saying, we separated. Michael followed me out. "This is anawkward business, " said he, "you had better make submission, and ask hispardon; for you know he can injure your prospects, and will do so, if you don't submit; he is not of the most forgiving cast--but that'sbetween ourselves. " "What o'clock is it?" said I. "Near three. " "Well, good-bye, and God bless you; if he had a spark of humanity in him, Iwould beg his pardon at once, if I thought I had offended him; but asto making submission to such a man, as you call it--why--this is a verysultry day, my friend. " I returned directly to the old man and his son;and, let purity or motive go as it may, truth to tell, they were nolosers by the priest's conduct; as I certainly slipped them a fewadditional shillings, out of sheer contempt for him. On tasting a littlerefreshment in one of the cabins, the son fainted--but on the whole theywere enabled to accomplish their journey home; and the father's blessingwas surely a sufficient antidote against the Priest's resentment. 

I was now ready to depart; and on my way to the boat, found my two oldfemale companions watching, lest I should pass, and they might miss mycompany on the way. It was now past three o'clock, and we determined totravel as far as we could that night, as the accommodations were vilein Petigo; and the spokeswoman mentioned a house of entertainment, abouttwelve miles forward, where, she said, we would find better treatment. When we got on terra firma, the first man I saw was the monosyllabichumorist, sitting on a hillock resting himself--his eyes fixed on theearth, and he evidently in a brown study on what he had gone through. Hewas drawing in his breath gradually, his cheeks expanding all the while, until they reached the utmost point of distention, when he would allat once let it go with a kind of easy puff, ending in a groan, as hesurveyed his naked feet, which were now quite square, and, like my own, out of all shape. I asked him how he liked the station; he gave me oneof the old looks, shrugged his shoulders, but said nothing--it was, however, a shrug condemnatory. I then asked him would he ever makeanother pilgrimage? He answered me by another shrug, a grave look, drylyraising his eye-brows, and a second appeal to his feet, all of whichI easily translated into strong negatives. We refreshed ourselves inPetigo. 

When we were on the way home, I observed that, although the singularand fatal accident which befell the young man in the prison excited verylittle interest at the time of its occurrence, yet no sooner had theywho witnessed it got clear of the island, than it was given with everypossible ornament; so that it would be as easy to recognize theplain fact, when decked out by their elucidations, as it would be tounderstand the sense of an original author, after it has come throughthe hands of half a hundred commentators. But human nature is a darkerenigma than any you could find, in the "Lady's Magazine. " Who wouldsuppose, for instance, that it was the same motive which set theirtongues wagging now, that had chained their spirits by the strong forceof the marvellous and the terrible, while they were in prison! Yet thiswas the fact; but their influence hung while there, like the tyrant'ssword, over each individual head; and until the danger of falling asleepin the "Prison" was past, they could feel no interest for anythingbeyond themselves. In both cases, however, they were governed by theforce of the marvellous and the terrible. 

When we had finished our journey for the day, I was glad to find atolerable bed; and never did man enjoy such a luxury of sweet sleep as Idid that night. My old companion, too, evinced an attention to me seldomexperienced in an accidental traveller. She made them get down water andbathe my feet, and asked me at what hour I would set out in the morning, telling me that she would see my clothes brushed, and everything doneherself--so minute was the honest creature in her little attentions. Itold her I would certainly take a nap in the morning, as I had slept solittle for the last three nights, and was besides so fatigued. "Musha tobe sure, and why not, agra! afther the hard bout you had in that blessedIsland! betoken that you're tinder and too soft rared to bear itlike them that the work hardens; sleep!--to be sure you'll sleep yourfill--you want it, in coorse; and now go to bed, and you'll appear quiteanother man in the mornin', plaise God!"

I did not awake the next morning till ten o'clock, when I found the sunshining full into the room. I accordingly dressed myself partially, andI say partially--for I was rather surprised to find an unexpected chasmin my wardrobe; neither my hat, coat, nor waistcoat being forthcoming. But I immediately made myself easy, by supposing that my kind companionhad brought them to be brushed. Yet I relapsed into something more thansurprise when I saw my fellow-traveler's redoubtable jacket lying on theseat of a chair, and her hare's-skin cap on the top of it. My misgivingsnow were anything but weak; nor was I at all improved, either in myreligion or philosophy, when, on calling up the landlady I heard that mytwo companions had set out that morning at four o'clock. I then inquiredabout my clothes, but all to no purpose; the poor landlady knew nothingabout them: which, in fact, was the case; but she told me that the oldone brushed them before she went away, saying that they were readyfor me to put on whenever I wanted them. "Well, " said I, "she has madeanother man of me. " The landlady desired me to try if I had my purse;and I found that the kind creature had certainly spared my purse, butshowed no mercy at all to what it contained, which was one pound inpaper, and a few shillings in silver, the latter, however, she left me. I had now no alternative but to don the jacket and the hare's-skin cap, which when I had done, with as bad a grace and as mortified a visageas ever man dressed himself with, I found I had not the slightestencouragement to throw my eye over the uniform gravity of my appearance, as I used to do in the black, for, alas! that which I was proudest of, viz. The clerical cut which it bestowed upon me was fairly gone--I hadnow more the appearance of a poacher than a priest. 

[Illustration: PAGE 818-- In this trim did I return to my friends]

In this trim did I return to my friends--a goose stripped of myfeathers; a dupe beknaved and beplundered--having been almost starvedto death in the "island, " and nearly cudgelled by one of the priests. Assoon as I crossed the threshold at home, the whole family were on theirknees to receive my blessing, there being a peculiar virtue in the LoughDerg blessing. The next thing I did, after giving them an account ofthe manner in which I was plundered and stripped, was to make a duedistribution of the pebbles* of the lake, to contain which my sistershad, previous to my journey, wrought me a little silk bag. This Ibrought home, stuffed as full as my purse was empty; for the epicene oldvillain left it to me in all its plenitude--disdaining to touch it. WhenI went to mass the following Sunday, I was surrounded by crowds, amongwhom I distributed my blessing, with an air of seriousness not at alllessened by the loss of my clothes and the emptying of my purse. Ontelling that part of my story to the priest, he laughed till the tearsran down his cheeks. He was a small, pleasant little man, who was seldomknown to laugh at anybody's joke but his own. Now, the said merriment ofthe Reverend Father I felt as contributing to make me look exceedinglyridiculous and sheepish. "So, " says he, "you have fallen foul ofNell M'Collum, the most notorious shuler in the province! a gipsy, afortuneteller, and a tinker's widow; but rest contented, you are not thefirst she has gulled--but beware the next time. "--"There is no danger of_that_, " said I, with peculiar emphasis. 

 * An uncommon virtue in curing all kinds of complaints is ascribed to these pebbles, small bags of which are brought home by the pilgrims, and distributed to their respective relations and friends.