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NIELS KLIM'S NARRATIVE. 

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NIELS KLIM'S

JOURNEY UNDER THE GROUND;

BEING A

NARRATIVE OF HIS WONDERFUL DESCENT TO THE SUBTERRANEANLANDS; TOGETHER WITH AN ACCOUNT OF THESENSIBLE ANIMALS AND TREES INHABITING THE

PLANET NAZAR AND THE FIRMAMENT. 

BY LOUIS HOLBERG. 

TRANSLATED FROM THE DANISH BY

JOHN GIERLOW. 

WITH A SKETCH OF THE AUTHOR'S LIFE. 

BOSTON:PUBLISHED BY SAXTON, PEIRCE & CO. 

NEW YORK:SAXTON & MILES. 1845. 

Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1844, BY SAXTON, PEIRCE AND CO. In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of theDistrict of Massachusetts. 

BUTTS, PRINTER, SCHOOL STREET. 

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LIST OF PLATES. 

NIELS KLIM'S DESCENT TO THE PLANET NAZAR, 1

A CRIMINAL LED BY THREE WATCHMEN, 23

PRESENTATION OF NIELS KLIM AT THE COURT OF POTU, 29

A CITIZEN OF POTU LED IN TRIUMPH, 41

THE JUDGMENT OF A KING'S CHARACTER, PRONOUNCED BY A POTUAN COUNCIL, 48

A NEW FASHION INTRODUCED INTO MARTINIA, 99

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INTRODUCTION. 

Lewis Holberg, the author of the _Narrative of Niels Klim_, was the mosteminent writer among the Danes in the eighteenth century. His works showa surprising versatility of genius, comprising Histories and Treatiseson Jurisprudence, together with Satires and Comedies. He was by birth aNorwegian, but was educated at the University at Copenhagen in Denmark. Soon after receiving a theological degree from that Institution, hevisited Holland and England, and resided about two years at Oxford. Shortly after his return he published an "Introduction to EuropeanHistory, " and an "Appendix to the Universal History, " in which he givesan account of contemporaneous affairs in the principal governments ofthe world. His historical labors were interrupted by a royal appointmentto a professorship in the University. This office he enjoyed for fiveyears, and then went abroad. In his Autobiography he has given aninteresting account of his travels, both at this time and subsequently, and has described men and manners in a way highly entertaining, andgenerally just. He visited most of the cities of Southern Europe, abiding some time in each. He was well received by men of letters, andmade many valuable acquaintance, wherever he went. After remaining onewhole winter at Rome, and accomplishing the object of his mission, hereturned to Copenhagen. His income was now small, and for two years hewas oppressed with great pecuniary difficulties. It was during thisperiod that he published in the Danish language, his "Introduction tothe Law of Nature and of Nations. " In this treatise, Holberg aimedrather to apply the principles of Natural Law to the Laws andConstitutions of Norway and Denmark, than elaborately to discuss theprinciples themselves. The work was coldly received at its firstappearance, but, after ten or twelve years began to excite publicattention, and passed through several editions. 

At length, the professorship of metaphysics becoming vacant, he receivedthe appointment. The emoluments of this office, though small, suppliedhis necessities, and, not long after, on obtaining a more lucrativestation in the University, he was relieved from his embarrassments. 

Hitherto, he had devoted himself almost exclusively to Jurisprudence, History and Languages, and had never tried his hand at poeticalcomposition. Indeed, he had ever felt a strange aversion to the study ofpoetry, and, although he had read the Latin Poets, and composed LatinPoems, it was more for the sake of proficiency in the language, than forpleasure, or, in his own words, "as a sick man swallows bitter draughts, not because they are grateful to the palate, but, because they arerecommended by the physicians. "

He now, however, seemed inspired by a new ambition, and set himself toimitate one of Juvenal's Satires. Encouraged by his unexpectedfacility, he projected and composed an original poem. Its success, whenpublished, surpassed that of any work previously written in the Danishlanguage. Judicious critics heartily commended it, and some even lookedupon it as introducing a new era in the national literature. It was alsopublished in Sweden and Germany, and raised the author's reputationabroad. He next published five more Satires, prefixing to each a shortpreface, unfolding the writer's design. His poetical productions were asource of more honor than gain, and, becoming weary of almost profitlesspursuits, he abandoned poetry, and devoted himself to his formerstudies. 

Nevertheless, the solicitations of friends prevailed upon him to turnhis attention to Dramatic composition. Here he was equally successful. His comedies were received with great applause, and still holdpossession of the stage. Like his Satires, they were intended to exposefashionable vice and folly. They are twenty-five in number. The names ofseveral will give some notion of their general character--_The BabblingBarber_; _Always Busy and Doing Nothing_; _The TreacherousStep-father_; _The Political Tinman_. 

His health being impaired by unintermitted literary labor, he determinedto seek relief from the baths of Aix-la-Chapelle. He did not derive fromthem the benefit he anticipated, but, after spending the winter inParis, returned home with renewed health and spirits. His nextpublication, was a Satirical Poem, entitled "Metamorphosis, " in whichbrutes and trees are transformed into men. This was the last of hispoetical efforts. 

For several years he had been engaged in preparing "_A GeneralEcclesiastical History from the origin of Christianity to theReformation of Luther_, " which he now published. This production, theauthor affirms, was written with perfect impartiality. He sometimescensured the Fathers, praised heretics, when they deserved it, andoccasionally even commended the Popes. It was extremely popular, thoughall were not pleased with its liberal spirit. _A Comparative Biographyof Asiatic and Indian Heroes_, after Plutarch's style; _A shortHistorical Account of his Native Town_; _The Narrative of Niels Klim_;_His Autobiography_; and a _History of the Jewish Nation_, digested fromthe works of Josephus, Prideaux, and Basnage, close the list of hisworks. 

"_The Journey to the World under ground_, " or "_Narrative of NielsKlim_, " had been written for a long time, but he had refrained fromprinting it from an unwillingness to provoke enmity. But the importunityof friends, and the generous offer of a bookseller finally prevailed, and he put it into the printer's hands. The following account of thisperformance is abridged from his autobiography. 

There are many persons of both sexes in my country, who believe infairies and supernatural beings, and who are ready to swear, that theyhave been conveyed by spirits to hills and mountain caves. Thissuperstition is ridiculed in Klim, the hero of the tale. He is supposedto be transported to the world under ground, where he meets with somesurprising adventures. Many strange creatures inhabit this new world;trees, for instance, are introduced, endowed with speech, and musicalinstruments discuss questions of philosophy and finance. Amongst thecharacters, those geniuses, who perceive everything at a glance, butpenetrate nothing, are conspicuous. People of quick perception, whom weuse to admire, are despised by the Potuans, who look upon them as idleloungers, that, though always moving, make no progress. Prudent men, onthe contrary, who measure their own strength, and advance cautiously, are greatly esteemed by that nation, though with us they pass for foolsor cowards. The Potuans and Martinians are examples of both theseextremes. By the former Klim was considered a blockhead, on account ofthe quickness of his perceptions; by the latter he was equally despisedfor the slowness of his apprehension. To Klim, who measures virtues andvices by the ordinary standard, everything is a paradox; but what he atfirst condemns, he admires and extols after deliberation; so that theobject of the whole work is to correct popular errors, and todistinguish the semblance of virtue and vice from the reality. Itssubordinate design is to expose the monstrous fictions, which someauthors obtrude upon us in their descriptions of remote countries. 

"_The Narrative of Niels Klim_, " though written so many years ago, contains many satirical hits, exceedingly applicable to the presenttime; thus showing that what appears to one age to be a whim altogethernew, may be, in fact, only some old notion newly promulgated. Greaterliberties were allowed at that period in literature than would now bepermitted. Holberg's humorous productions are not wholly free from afault, whose existence the taste of any age may explain, but does notexcuse. 

After living in competency for many years in Copenhagen, he was, in1747, created a baron by the king of Denmark. He died in 1754. 

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APOLOGETIC PREFACE. 

PETER KLIM AND ANDREAS KLIM, THE SONS OF THOMAS KLIM, AND GRANDSONS OFKLIM THE GREAT, TO THE KIND READER. 

Since it has come to our ears that some persons have doubted the truthof this story, and that, consequently, the publisher of the subterraneanvoyage has gotten, here and there, a bad reputation, we have, to preventall false accusations, held it advisable to prefix to this new editioncertificates from men whose honesty and sincerity are raised above alldistrust, and whose evidence will secure the publisher against allopposition. The first two of these witnesses we know to have beencontemporary with our hero; the rest flourished at a period immediatelysubsequent; and all are generally known as people venerable in virtueand honesty, whose cool and sound judgments effectually preclude theblandishments of cajolery, while their noble candor and undeviatinguprightness forbid the sanction of their names to whatever is, in itsnature, deceitful or fictitious. With the testimony of such respectablepersons, we shall bind the tongues of all false, prejudiced and sneeringcritics, and, before these signatures, oblige them to acknowledge theirfolly and take back their heedless accusations. The certificate sent tomy brother and myself reads thus:

 "At the desire of the estimable and much respected young men, PETER KLIM and ANDREAS KLIM, we, the undersigned, do certify, that among the books and papers left by the celebrated NIELS KLIM, we have seen a manuscript, with the title, 'Subterranean Voyage. ' To the same 'Voyage' were added a subterranean Grammar and Dictionary, in two languages, namely, Danish and Quamitic. By comparing the celebrated Abelin's Latin translation with this old manuscript, we find that the former does not, in the least point, deviate from the hand-text. To its further confirmation we have hereby placed our seals. 

 ADRIAN PETERSON, MPP. JENS THORLAKSEN, MPP. SVEND KLAK, MPP. JOKUM BRANDER, MPP. JENS GAD, (for self and brother, ) MPP. HIERONYMOUS GIBS, (Scotch, ) MPP. "

We hope by such distinguished and authentic testimony to remove alldoubt; but should there be found any stubborn enough to persist in theirsuspicions, in spite of these certificates, we will anticipate theirobjections, and endeavor to subdue their incredulity with other weapons. 

It is a known fact, that in a section of Norway, called _Finnmark_, exist people who have advanced so far in the study and practice ofnatural witchcraft, (a science into which other nations have scarcelylooked, ) that they can excite and subdue storms; transform themselves towolves; speak several, and in our world entirely unknown, languages; andtravel from the north to the south pole in less time than one hour. Oneof these Finns, by name Peyvis, came lately to Bergen, and exhibited somany strange proofs of his art and science, that all present deemed himworthy of a doctor's hat: at the same time a fierce critic came out witha review of the "Subterranean Travels, " which he assumptively tagged tothe long list of "old women's stories;" the honor of the Klims beingthus impugned, and his own by implication, Peyvis, through ourinfluence, obtained permission to collect materials and prepare himselffor a voyage under ground. He commenced by publishing a card, wherein heexalted his abilities in the following expressions:

 What will you? say! From northern ice to southern land: From eastern isles to western sand, Spirits of earth, spirits of air; Spirits foul and spirits fair, My power obey! I break the rainbow's arched line; That herald of approaching calm. Thunder I send by cold moonshine, -- Mine is the bane and mine the balm. My beck upwhirls the hurricane: The sun and moon and stars in vain Their wonted course would keep; Honey from out the rock doth weep When I command. My potent wand, Stretched on the mighty northern wave, Or seas that farther India lave, Subdues their mountain billows hoarse, To inland brooklets' murmuring course. What is on earth, what is in sea, In air and fire, from Peyvis free?

Everybody shuddered from fear at hearing these incredible assumptions. The Finn immediately prepared himself for the voyage, undressed, and, strange sight! suddenly transformed to an eagle, raised himself into theair and soon vanished. After a full month's absence, our wonderfuldoctor, early on a morning, re-appeared, entirely exhausted, hisforehead streaming with sweat. When sufficiently recovered from hisfatigue, he commenced a description of his adventures on his air passageand in the subterranean lands. He told us that on his arrival below, warwas raging between the established government and the opposition, inwhich the party of Klim got the ascendancy, and reinstated the son ofour Niels on the throne; our kinsman had for a long time borne thesceptre, under the administration of his mother; but now, old andglorified for many great feats, reigned alone over the wholesubterranean world, with the name of Niels the Second. 

Now, take shame to yourselves, ye incredulous mortals! and learnhereafter, in important matters, to proceed with more caution. Beashamed, ye scoffers! and ask pardon for your unfounded accusations, your atrocious sneers. Stand abashed, finally, ye hyper-critics! andknow that the learned world shall no longer suffer from your audaciousand unreasonable judgments; then silence your stunted progeny at theirbirth, or if you will, yourselves!

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CHAPTER I. 

THE AUTHOR'S DESCENT TO THE ABYSS. 

In the year 1664, after graduating at the Academy of Copenhagen, inTheology and Philosophy, I prepared to return to my father-land, andtook passage in a ship bound for the city of Bergen, in Norway. I hadbeen furnished with brilliant testimonials from both faculties, andwanted only money;--a fate common to Norwegian students, who generallyreturn home with empty purses from the Temple of the Muses. 

We had a good wind, and in three days arrived at my native town, Bergen. 

I occupied myself now, in expanding my knowledge of natural philosophy, and for practice, geologically examined the neighboring mountains. Onthe top of the most interesting of these mountains, (interesting I meanto a student, ) was a remarkable cave, which the inhabitants of the towncalled _Florien_. From its mouth, a mild and not unpleasant air issuesat certain periods, as though the cave inhaled the breeze and gentlysighed it forth again. 

The learned in Bergen, especially the celebrated Abelin and Edward, hadlonged to examine it; but these latter, from their great age, beingunable to perform so arduous a feat, used every occasion to induce theyoung and adventurous to attempt the exploration. Instigated, (and itwas a foolish, and I might say, a wicked resolution, ) instigated, I say, not less by the encouragement of these great men than by my owninclination, I determined to descend into the cave. The longer I thoughtof the matter, the firmer I became. I prepared every thing needful forthe expedition, and on a Thursday, at the morning twilight, departedfrom the city. I started thus early, because I desired to finish mylabors before dark, and make a report the same evening. 

How little did I then dream that like another Phaėton, I should bedriven headlong through the air and precipitated to another globe, thereto ramble for the space of ten years, before I should see my friends andnative land again. The expedition took place in the year 1665. Accompanied by four men to carry the necessary implements, and assist inletting me down, I ascended the mountain. Arrived at the top, near thefatal cave, we sat down to breakfast. Now, for the first time, my heartbegan to faint, as though it foreboded my coming misfortune; but, in amoment, my half extinguished courage blazed again. I fixed a rope aroundmy body, stood on the edge of the cave, and commended my soul to God. Ordering the men to veer the rope steadily, and to hold when I criedout, I took a boat-hook in my right hand, and glided into the abyss. Aided by the pole, I was enabled to keep clear of the jutting points ofrock that would have impeded my progress, as well as have wounded me. Iwas somewhat anxious about the rope, for it rubbed hard against therocks at the top; and, in fact, I had scarcely descended twenty tothirty feet, when it gave way, and I tumbled with strange quickness downthe abyss, armed like Pluto, with a boat-hook, however, in place of asceptre. 

Enveloped by thick darkness, I had been falling about a quarter of anhour, when I observed a faint light, and soon after a clear andbright-shining heaven. I thought, in my agitation, that some countercurrent of air had blown me back to earth. The sun, moon and stars, appeared so much smaller here than to people on the surface, that I wasat a loss with regard to my where-a-bout. 

I concluded that I must have died, and that my spirit was now about tobe carried to the blessed dwellings. I immediately conceived the follyof this conclusion, however, when I found myself armed with a boat-hook, and dragging behind me a long strip of rope; well knowing that neitherof these were needful to land me in Paradise, and that the celestialcitizens would scarcely approve of these accessories, with which Iappeared, in the manner of the giants of old, likely to attack heavenand eject the gods therefrom. 

Finally, a new light glimmered in my brain. I must have got into thesubterranean firmament. This conclusion decided the opinion of those, who insist that the earth is hollow, and that within its shell there isanother, lesser world, with corresponding suns, planets, stars, &c. , tobe well-grounded. The result proved that I guessed right. 

The rapidity of my descent, continually augmented for a long time, nowbegan to decrease gradually. I was approaching a planet which I had fromthe first seen directly before me. By degrees it grew larger and larger, when, penetrating the thick atmosphere which surrounded it, I plainlysaw seas, mountains and dales on its surface. 

 As the bold bird, between the billow's top And mountain's summit, sweeps around The muscle-clothed rock, and with light wing Sports on the foam, my body hovered. 

I found now that I did not hang in the atmosphere, buoyed up by thestrong current of which I have spoken, but that the perpendicular lineof my descent was changed to a circle. I will not deny that my hair roseup on my head in fear. I knew not but that I might be metamorphosed toa planet or to a satellite; to be turned around in an eternal whirl. Yetmy courage returned, as I became somewhat accustomed to the motion. Thewind was gentle and refreshing. I was but little hungry or thirsty; butrecollecting there was a small cake in my pocket, I took it out andtasted it. The first mouthful, however, was disagreeable, and I threw itfrom me. The cake not only remained in the air, but to my greatastonishment, began to circle about me. I obtained at this time aknowledge of the true law of motion, which is, that all bodies, whenwell balanced, must move in a circle. 

I remained in the orbit in which I was at first thrown three days. As Icontinually moved about the planet nearest to me, I could easilydistinguish between night and day; for I could see the subterranean sunascend and descend--the night, however, did not bring with it darknessas it does with us. I observed, that on the descent of the sun, thewhole heavens became illuminated with a peculiar and very bright light. This, I ascribed to the reflection of the sun from the internal arch ofthe earth. 

But just as I began to fancy myself in the near presence of the immortalgods, about to become myself a new heavenly light and wondered at as abrilliant star--behold! a horrible, winged monster appeared, who seemedto threaten me with instant destruction. When I saw this object in thedistance I supposed it to be one of the celestial signs, but when itcame near I perceived it to be an enormous eagle, which followed in mywake as if about to pounce upon me. I observed that this creaturenoticed me particularly, but could not determine whether as a friend orenemy. 

Had I reflected, I should not have wondered that a human being, swinginground in the air, with a boat-hook in his hand, and a long rope draggingbehind him, like a tail, should attract the attention of even a brutecreature. 

My uncommon figure gave, as I afterwards understood, occasion forstrange reports to the inhabitants on my side of the planet. 

The astronomers regarded me as a comet, with a very long tail. Thesuperstitious thought my appearance to be significant of some comingmisfortune. Some draughtsmen took my figure, as far as they coulddescry it, so that when I landed I found paintings of myself, andengravings taken from them, and hawked about. 

But to return; the eagle flew towards me and attacked me with his wingsvery furiously. I defended myself as well as I could with my boat-hook, and even vigorously, considering my unstable situation. At last, when heattempted to grapple with me, I thrust the hook in between his wings sofirmly that I could not extricate it. 

The wounded monster fell, with a terrible cry, to the globe beneath; andholding the hook, I, well tired of my pendant attitude, was dragged tothe planet. 

At first my descent was violent, but the increasing thickness of theatmosphere as I approached the planet, made me sink with an easy andsoft fall to the earth. Immediately on touching it the eagle died of itswounds. 

It was now night; or rather the sun was down, for it was not dark. Icould see clearly to read the papers I had in my pocket. 

The light, as I have already said, comes from the firmament or internalshell of our earth, half of it being brightened at one time like ourmoon. The only difference between night and day is that the absence ofthe sun makes the weather a little colder. 

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CHAPTER II. 

THE AUTHOR'S ARRIVAL AT THE PLANET NAZAR. 

My voyage through the air was now ended. I lay for a long time entirelyimmovable, awaiting my fate with the approach of day. I now observedthat the wants and weaknesses of humanity, which, during my passage hadceased, now returned. I was both sleepy and hungry. Fatigued in mind andbody I fell into a deep slumber. I had slept, as far as I could judge, about two hours, when a terrible roar, which had previously disturbed myslumbers, suddenly waked me. I had dreamed some curious dreams; in one, I thought myself to be in Norway, at the church in my native town, listening to the singing of our clerk, whose voice was really unpleasantfrom its roughness. My first impression therefore, on recovering myselfwas, that this man was indulging in an extraordinarily ambitious strain. In fact, on opening my eyes, I saw a huge bull within a few feet of me. At the same moment, a vigorous roar from this animal convinced me that Idid not listen to church music. 

It was now day-break, and the rising sun began to gild the green oaksand fruitful fields, which, spreading abroad in every direction, astonished my recovered sense. 

How much greater was my surprise when I saw the trees, of which therewere great numbers in my view, move, although not a breeze stirred. 

The vicinity of the bull not being pleasing to me, I arose and began toascend a tree which stood near. As I raised myself by its limbs, it gavea low, yet shrill scream, and I got at the same time a lively slap on myear, which propelled me headlong to the ground. Here I lay as if struckby lightning, about to give up my spirit, when I heard around me amurmuring noise, such as is heard on the Exchange when the merchants areassembled. 

I opened my eyes and saw many trees moving about the field. Imagine myagitation, when one of the trees swept towards me, bent one of itsbranches, and, lifting me from the ground, carried me off, in spite ofmy woful cries, followed by an innumerable number of its companions ofall kinds and sizes. From their trunks issued certain articulatedsounds, which were entirely incomprehensible to me, and of which Iretained only the words: _Pikel-Emi_, on account of their being oftenrepeated. I will here say, these words mean an extraordinary monkey, which creature they took me to be, from my shape and dress. All this, ofcourse, I learned after being some months among them. 

In my present condition, I was far from being able to conceive of thenature of sensible, speaking trees. In truth, so confounded was I, thatI forgot I could speak myself. As little could I understand the meaningof the slow, solemn procession, and the confused murmurs which resoundedin the air. 

I fancied they were reproaching or expressing their contempt of me. Iwas not far from the truth: for the tree into which I had climbed toescape from the bull, was no less than the wife of the sheriff of theneighboring town, to which they were now taking me a prisoner. 

The buildings and streets of this town were very handsome and extensive. The houses, from their height, appeared like huge towers. The streetswere wide and filled with trees, which swayed about and saluted eachother by lowering their branches. 

The greater this declination, the more expressive was it of respect andesteem. 

As we passed through a very wide street I saw a tall oak approach adistinguished house, when the trees which escorted me, steppedgracefully back, and bent their branches to the ground. I concluded thismust be a more than common personage. In fact, it was the sheriffhimself, the very dignitary, whose lady it was insisted I had come toonear. I was carried to the hall of this officer's house, and the doorwas locked upon me. Several trees armed with axes kept guard over me. The axes were held in the branches, which served the same purpose ashuman hands. I noticed that high up in the branches each wore a head, about the size of my own, covered with leaves and tendrils instead ofhair. Below were two roots or legs, very short. 

These trees were much smaller than those on our earth, in fact beingabout the height of a man; some indeed were much shorter; but these Iconcluded to be children. 

While reflecting on the miserable situation in which I found myself, andweeping over the ill-luck of my adventure, my guards stepped up to meand commanded me to follow them. They led me to a splendid building inthe middle of the market-place. 

At the door of this building stood Justice, cut out in the form of atree, holding among the branches a pair of scales. I presumed thestructure to be the court-house, nor was I deceived. I was carried intoa large room, the floor of which was overlaid with glittering marbleflags of various colors. 

At the upper end a golden chair was raised a little above the floor, like a judge's seat; in it was seated a sedate palm tree, distinguishedfrom the rest by the gorgeousness of his leaves; a little below him wereseated twelve assessors, six on either side. About them stoodtwenty-four officers holding axes. I was not a little terrified whenbrought a prisoner before these magnates. 

As I entered the hall, all the officers of the court stood up, elevatedtheir branches and then sat down. After this ceremony I was placed atthe bar between two trees, the stems of which were covered withsheep-skins. These persons I supposed to be lawyers, and so they were. 

Before the trial commenced, the head of the judge was wrapped up in ablack blanket. The accuser then made a short speech, which he thricerepeated. The lawyer appointed to defend me, replied in the same manner. A perfect silence then ensued. In half an hour the superior judge rosefrom the chair, removed the blanket, raised the branches towards Heaven, and spoke with much grace, what I supposed to be my sentence. I was thencarried back to my prison. 

While I mused on the strange things I had witnessed, a tree came intomy cell, with an instrument resembling a lancet in his hand. He strippedone of my arms, and made a puncture in the median vein. When he hadtaken from me as much blood as he deemed sufficient, he bound up thewound with great dexterity. He then examined my blood with muchattention, and departed silently, with an expression of wonder. 

This circumstance by no means weakened the opinion which I had for sometime entertained, that these people were shallow and foolish. But myjudgment proved to be too hasty. When I was better enabled to judge ofwhat passed about me, by acquaintance with the subterranean languages, my contempt was changed to admiration. 

I will now explain the ceremonies, which to my ignorance seemedridiculous. 

From my figure it was concluded that I was an inhabitant of thefirmament. I was supposed to have attempted to violate the person of achaste and virtuous lady, and for this crime I had been taken to thecourt-house for trial. 

The rising of the branches towards Heaven, was a common ceremony ofreligion. The lawyers were clothed in sheep-skin, to remind them of theattributes of their calling--innocence, faithfulness, and sedateness. The repetition of their speeches was on account of the very slowapprehension and cautious decision of the people, by which peculiaritiesthey were distinguished from all the inhabitants of the subterraneanworld. But what most excited my curiosity was the history of the supremejudge. This was a virgin, a native of the town, and appointed by theKing to the office of Kaki, or judge, for her superior virtue andtalent. It must be observed that this nation pay no regard to sex inappointments to office, but, after a strict examination, elect those totake charge of affairs who are proved to be the most worthy. 

Seminaries are established throughout the country, to teach theaspirants to public honors the duties appertaining to the direction ofgovernment. The business of the administrators of these colleges is tosearch closely into the brains and hearts of the young students, andwhen satisfied with their virtue and ability, to give to the king a listof those fully prepared to fill the public offices. The administratorsare called Karatti. 

The young virgin of whom I have spoken, had received, four years beforefrom the Karatti, a certificate for remarkable attainments and virtues, and had been invested with the "blanket. " This blanket was wrapped abouther head during my trial; this precaution, however, is taken only intrials such as mine, in which the occasionally broad nature of thetestimony might have a painful effect upon the virgin judge, should herface be exposed to the public gaze. 

The name of this virgin was Palmka. She had officiated for three yearswith the greatest honor, and was considered the most learned tree in thecity. 

She solved with so much discretion the knottiest questions, that herdecisions had come to be regarded as oracles. 

 As Themis' self, with scales of equal weight, She judged with candor both the small and great: The sands of truth she, like the goddess, frees From falsehood's glitter and from error's lees. 

The following account was given to me of the blood-letting to which Ihad been subjected. When any one is proved to be guilty of a crime, heis bled, for the purpose of detecting from the color of the fluid, orblood, how far his guilt was voluntary or otherwise; whether he hadsinned through malice or distemper. Should the fluid be founddiscolored, he is sent to the hospital to be cured; thus this process israther a correction than a punishment. A member of the council, or anyone high in office, would be removed, should it be found necessary tobleed him. 

The reason why the surgeon, who performed the operation on me, wasastonished, was, on account of the redness of my blood. The inhabitantshaving a sort of white fluid in their veins, the purity of which isproportional to their innocence and excellence. 

I was put at my ease when I observed that the trees generally possesseda large share of humanity. This was displayed in their little attentionsto me. Food was brought to me twice a day. It consisted of fruit andseveral kinds of beans; my drink was a clear, sweet and exceedinglydelicious juice. 

The sheriff, in whose house I was imprisoned, had immediately givennotice to the King that he had by accident got possession of a somewhatsensible animal of an uncommon figure. The description of my personexcited the king's curiosity. Orders were given to the sheriff, that Ishould be taught the language of the country; on which I should be sentto court. A teacher was appointed for me, whose instruction enabled mein a half year to speak very comprehensibly. After this preparatorycourse of private study, I was sent to the seminary, where particularcare was taken both of my mental and physical education. Indeed, soenthusiastic were they to naturalize me, that they actually fastenedbranches to my body to make me look as much as possible like themselves. 

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CHAPTER III. 

DESCRIPTION OF THE TOWN KEBA. 

During the course of my education, my landlord frequently carried meabout the town, and pointed out the most remarkable things. Keba is thetown next in size and importance to the capital of the kingdom of Potu. The inhabitants are distinguished for their sedateness and moderation;old age is more respected by them than by any other community. They arestrangely addicted to the pitting of animals against each other; or, asthey call it, "play fight. " I wondered that so moral a people couldenjoy these brutal sports. My landlord noticed my surprise, and said, that throughout the kingdom it was the custom to vary their lives with adue mixture of earnest duties and amusing pleasures. Theatrical playsare very much in vogue with them. I was vexed, however, to hear thatdisputations are reckoned suitable for the stage, while with us they areconfined to the universities. 

At certain times in the year, disputants are set against each other, aswe pit dogs and game cocks. High bets are made in favor of one or theother, and a premium is given to the winner. 

Beside these disputants, who are called Masbakki, or boxers, variousquadrupeds, wild as well as tame, are trained to fight as on our globe. 

In this town a gymnasium is established, in which the liberal arts aretaught with much success. 

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My landlord carried me, on a high festival day, to this academy. On thisoccasion a Madic, or teacher in philosophy, was elected. The candidatemade a very prosy speech on some philosophical question, after which, without farther ceremony, he was entered, by the administrators, onthe list of the public teachers. 

On our way home from the academy, we met a criminal, led by threewatchmen. By sentence of the kaki, he had been bled, and was now on hisway to the city hospital. I inquired concerning his crime, and wasanswered, that he had publicly lectured on the being and qualities ofGod--a subject entirely forbidden in this country. Disputants on thesematters are regarded as insane, and are always sent to the mad-house, where they are doctored, until they recover their sound reason. Iexclaimed: Heaven and Earth! how would such laws operate on our globe, where thousands of priests quarrel every day about the divineattributes, the nature of spirits, and other secrets of the samecharacter? Truly, here they would all be sent straight-way to themad-house. These, among many other singular customs, I observed duringmy college life. Finally, the time came when, furnished with appropriatetestimonies from the teachers, I was ordered to court. Here is mycertificate. How angry and confused, was I, when I read it:--

 "In accordance with your royal order, we hereby send the animal, which sometime since came down to us from the firmament; which animal calls itself man. We have, with sedulous care and patient industry, taught this singular creature in our school, and after a very severe examination, pronounce it to be very quick in its perceptions and very docile in its manners. Nevertheless, from its obtuse and miserable judgment--which we believe arises from its too hasty inferences--its ridiculous scepticism on unquestionable points, and its no less ridiculous credulity on doubtful ones, we may scarcely number it among sensible beings. However, as it is far quicker on its legs than any of our race, we humbly suggest, that it is very well adapted for the situation of a running-camp-footman. Written at our Seminary at Keba by your Highness' most humble servants. 

 NEHEK, JOKTAN, RAPASI, KILAK. "

I returned sorrowfully to my landlord, and begged of him with tears inmy eyes, to use his influence to alter the nature of my certificate fromthe Karatti, and to show them my testimony from the academy ofCopenhagen, in which I was represented as a remarkable student. Hereplied to me, "that this diploma might be well enough in Copenhagen, where probably the shadow was regarded more than the substance: the barkmore than the sap; but here, where the kernel was more important thanaught else, it was of no use. "

He counselled me to bear my fate with patience, and assured me, in thepolitest manner, of his friendship. Having nothing more to say, I madeready, without delay, for the journey. There travelled in company withme several small trees, which had been educated with me in the seminary, and were now destined to the capital for preferment. 

Our leader was an old Karatti, who rode on an ox, because from his agehe could not walk. Our progress was very slow, so that three days wereoccupied in our passage. We had a quick and comfortable jaunt, if Iexcept the meeting with some wild monkeys, that would spring towards me, and pester me now and then. They evidently supposed me to be one oftheir race. I could not suppress my anger, however, when I observed thatthe trees seemed to perceive this mistake of the monkeys, which gave thesaplings food for laughter at my expense. I must remark that I wascarried to court in the same dress which I wore on my descent to theplanet, with the boat-hook in my hand and the rope dragging after me. This was by order of the king, who wished to see me in my own bark. 

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CHAPTER IV. 

THE ROYAL COURT OF POTU. 

At last, we entered the large and splendid capital of the kingdom ofPotu. 

We were first carried to a house, where all students from the countryseminaries are received, for the purpose of refreshment. Here weprepared for an interview with the king. In the mean time our Karatti, or leader went before to announce us to the court. On his return, wewere all ordered to follow him. On our way to court we met several smalltrees, with printed stories in their branches. These were literaryhawkers. I accidentally fixed my eye upon the title of one of thesebooks. It was: "A true account of an entirely new and wonderful meteor, or flying dragon, which was seen last year in the heavens. " I knew thiswas myself, and therefore purchased the book, for which threekilak--about two cents--were demanded. On the title page I found anengraving of myself, as I appeared while hovering over the planet, accompanied by boat-hook and rope. We now approached the castle, anextensive series of battlements and buildings, more distinguished forits strength and delicacy of finish than for splendor. It presented tomy view a very singular, and, I may say rural, appearance, from the vastnumber of trees on the walls. 

It was now noon, and the dinner hour. The king wishing to see me beforehe dined, I was brought alone to the dining hall. The king received mevery graciously, uniting in a remarkable degree, while addressing me, mildness of tone with dignity of expression. 

[Illustration]

At my entrance into the hall, I knelt before the throne: the kingdemanded the meaning of the ceremony. Having told him the reason, heremarked, that such worship was due only to the Divinity. When I hadraised myself, he put to me several questions--demanding how I had comedown?--the reason of my journey--my name--where I came from, &c. , allwhich questions I answered truly. Finally, he inquired concerning myreligion, and was evidently much pleased with our creed. I was orderedto wait till dinner was over. At the table were seated with the King, the Queen, Prince, and Kadok, or great chancellor. At a certain sign, amaiden tree entered, bearing in her eight branches, as many dishes, which was the number daily served at the royal table. Another treeentered with eight bottles, filled with as many different juices. In thedinner conversation, frequent mention was made of myself. 

After dinner, the King ordered me to show my testimony. After readingit, he looked at my legs. "The Karatti are perfectly right!" said he;"and their advice shall be followed. " A Kiva, or secretary, was now sentfor, to enter me, among others, in the royal register of promotion. ThisKiva was a tree of remarkable external appearance; he had elevenbranches--a singular number--and was able to write eleven letters atonce. With this tree I afterwards became very intimate; he wrote all theletters which I, as footman, carried about the country. 

On receiving my appointment, I went to bed. Although I was muchfatigued, I could not get any sleep for a long while. However, I fell, at last, into an uneasy slumber, from which I was suddenly roused by anuncommonly large monkey, which, on opening my eyes, I found playing allmanner of tricks with me, much to the amusement of several young trees, my companions. The king laughed heartily over the jokes of the monkeys, when they were related to him, but at the same time, ordered me to beclothed in the subterranean manner; that is, ornamented with branches, as I had been at my first arrival below ground. My European clothes weretaken from me and hung up in the museum, with the following descriptionattached:

DRESS OF THE CREATURES ABOVE GROUND. 

After my fright from the monkey, I got no more sleep. In the morning Irose with the sun, and went to receive my charge for the day. Aninnumerable number of errands were given me to perform, together withletters and documents directed to all parts of the country. 

This life I led four years; during my rambles I studied the character ofthe inhabitants, and copied, as far as possible, their habits. Thepeople generally are distinguished for the politeness of their manners, and the sensibleness of their notions. The citizens of the town of_Maholki_, only, are wanting in refinement and judgment; they are thorntrees; very obstinate and crabbed in disposition, and great gossips, withal; let one take you by the button and you cannot get away easily. 

Each province is peopled by its own race of trees; in the country eachvillage has one sect; but the large cities contain a mixed population. 

I had a good opportunity, as courier-general, to observe thepeculiarities of these people, and I shall now describe their polity andreligion, their laws and sciences. 

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CHAPTER V. 

THE KINGDOM OF POTU AND ITS INHABITANTS. 

The kingdom of _Potu_ is enclosed within very narrow boundaries, andoccupies but a small space of the inner globe. 

The whole planet _Nazar_ is scarcely six hundred miles in circumference, and may be travelled over its whole extent without guide or interpreter, for there is but one language throughout. As the Europeans on our globetake the first rank among the nations, so are the _Potuans_distinguished among the nations of _Nazar_ for their virtue andunderstanding. 

The roads are dotted by stone pillars, which, covered with inscriptions, denote every mile; affixed to them are hands pointing the road to everycity and village;--splendid cities and prosperous villages! The countryis intersected by greater and lesser canals, on which boats propelled byoars, skim with wonderful celerity. The oars are driven by self-movingmachines, so quietly that very little motion is given to the water. Theplanet Nazar has the same motion with the earth, and all thepeculiarities of the latter planet: night and day; spring, summer, autumn, and winter. The inhabitants consist of oak, lime, poplar, thorn, and pine trees, from which the months--there being six in eachsubterranean year--take their names. 

The chronology is peculiar, being fixed by remarkable occurrences. Theiroldest tradition is, that three thousand years ago, a mighty cometappeared, immediately after which followed a flood, which swept off allthe races of trees, animals, &c. , with the exception of one or two ofeach race, who saved themselves upon a high mountain, and from whomdescended the present inhabitants. Corn and other grain with the fruitscommon to Europe, grow here in great profusion. The waters are filledwith fish, and upon the banks of the rivers are seated splendid countryhouses. Their drink is prepared from certain herbs, which bloom at alltimes of the year. 

In _Potu_ is established a very useful law called the "generation law. "

This law varies the liberties and advantages of the people according tothe number of children each one possesses. Thus, he who is the father ofsix children is exempted from all common and extraordinary taxes. Therefore generation is quite as useful and desirable in this country ason the earth it is burthensome and dangerous: below ground never wassuch a thing imagined as a small-pox-tax. 

No one can hold two offices at once. It is thought that each office, however small, requires the sole attention of its occupant, and thatnone should be employed in that which they do not understand. 

I remember to have heard the philosopher _Rakbasi_ speak thus: "Everyone should know his own talents, and should impartially judge of hisown merits and faults; otherwise the actor must be considered moresensible than natural men; for he chooses, not the best part, but thatwhich he can execute best. Shall we allow the actor to be wiser on thestage than we in life?"

The inhabitants of this kingdom are not divided into classes; thosealone being regarded who are noted for virtue and industry. The highestrank, if rank it may be called, is given to those who possess thegreatest number of branches, they being enabled to do the most work. 

[Illustration]

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CHAPTER VI. 

THE RELIGION OF THE POTUANS. 

The system of religion in _Potu_ is very simple. 

It is forbidden, under pain of banishment to the firmament, to explainthe holy books; whoever dares to dispute the being and nature of theDeity, is sent to the mad-house and is bled. It is foolish, they say, toattempt to describe that to which our senses are as blind as the eyes ofthe owl in sunshine. All agree in worshiping a superior being, whoseomnipotence has created and whose providence maintains all things. Eachone is permitted to think and worship as he pleases; they only whopublicly attack the prevailing religion, are punished aspeace-disturbers. The people pray seldom, but with so ardent a devotion, that a looker-on would think them enraptured during the continuance ofthe prayer. 

I told them that it was our custom to pray and sing psalms, while at ourdomestic duties. This they blamed. "An earthly king, " said they, "wouldbe angry should one who came to petition for something, brush hisclothes and comb his hair in the presence of his sovereign. "

They have many curious notions of religion, which they defend veryartfully; for example, when I remarked to some of them whose friendshipI had gained, that they could not expect to be blessed after death, since they walked in darkness here, they answered: "He, who withseverity condemned others, was himself in danger of being condemned. "

I once advised them to pray every day. They did not deny the importanceof prayer, but thought true religion consisted in obeying the will ofGod. "Suppose, " continued they, "that a king has two kinds of subjects:some err every day, violating from ignorance or malice the ruler'scommands; they come each day with petitions and deprecations to thepalace, beg pardon for their faults, and depart only to recommit them. 

"The others come seldom, and never voluntarily to court, but executefaithfully and diligently every of the king's commands, and therebyevince the respect and loyalty due to him. 

"Will not the king think these deserving of his love, as good subjectsand faithful; but, on the contrary, those as evil subjects, burthensomeas well for their misdeeds as for their frequent petitions?"

There are five festival days during the year. The first of these, whichtakes place at the beginning of the oak month, is solemnized with greatdevotion, in dark places, where not a ray of light is suffered to enter, signifying that the being they worship is inconceivable. The festival iscalled the "inconceivable-God's-day. " The whole day, from sunrise tosunset, the people remain immovable, engaged in earnest and heart-feltprayer. In the four other festivals, thanks to God for his blessingsform the principal ceremonies. 

[Illustration]

CHAPTER VII. 

THE POTUAN CONSTITUTION. 

In the kingdom of Potu the crown is inherited, as with us, by the eldestson of the king, whose power is absolute. The government, however, israther fatherly than tyrannical. Justice is not meted and bounded by lawalone, but is the result of principle, a principle of the widestphilosophic comprehension. Thus, monarchy and liberty are closelyunited, which otherwise would be inimical to each other. The ruler seeksto maintain, as far as possible, an equality among his subjects. Honorsare not limited to any class; but the poorer and more ignorant arecalled upon to receive their opinions from and submit to the decisionsof the richer and more intelligent: the young are to respect the aged. 

The annals of Potu show that some centuries ago, certain classes werehighly favored by the laws to the exclusion of the great body of thepeople; frequent disturbances had been the result of this favoritism, till a citizen of the town Keba, proposed an alteration in the laws, bywhich all distinctions of class were abolished, and while the office ofking should still remain hereditary, all the other officers ofgovernment should be subject to the will of the people, all of whomshould be allowed to vote, who could read and write, at least, theirnames. 

According to the custom of the subterraneans in such affairs, thisintelligent and patriotic citizen was led to the market-place, with arope about his neck: his proposition was considered, and after gravedeliberation was adopted, as conducive to the general interest. 

The mover was then carried in triumph through the city, honored by thegrateful shouts of the people. 

[Illustration]

He, who has the most numerous offspring, is regarded as the mostdeserving citizen; he is honored above all others, without exception. 

Such men are looked upon as heroes, and their memory is sainted byposterity. They only receive the name, which on the earth is awarded tothe disturbers and enemies of the race--the name of--great!

It is very easy to conceive of the degree in which Alexander and JuliusCęsar would be prized by this people; both of whom not only had nochildren themselves, but murdered millions of the offspring of others. 

I remember to have read the following inscription on the tomb of a Kebanpeasant:

"Here lies Jorktan the great, the hero of his time, father of thirtychildren. "

Among the court officers the Kadori, or grand-chamberlain, is thesuperior. Next after him comes the Smizian, or treasurer. In my time, the seven-branched widow, Kahagna, filled the latter place. She was avirtuous and industrious woman; although her duties were many andimportant, she nursed her child herself. I remarked once, that I thoughtthis to be troublesome and unfit for so great a lady. I was replied toin this wise: "For what purpose has nature given breasts to woman? forthe ornament of the body alone, --or for the nourishment of theirchildren?"

The crown prince was a child of six years; his governor was the wisesttree in the kingdom. I have seen an abstract of moral philosophy andpolicy, written by him for the use of the prince, the title of which isMahalda Libal Helit, which in the subterranean language means, TheCountry's Rudder. It contains many fundamental and useful precepts, ofwhich I recollect the following:

"1st. Neither praise nor blame should be too hastily credited; judgmentshould be deferred until accurate knowledge of the matter is obtained. 

"2d. When a tree is accused of any crime, and the accusation issupported, then the life of the culprit must be examined, his good andevil actions must be compared, and judgment be given according to thepreponderance of either. 

"3d. The king must be accurately acquainted with the opinions of hissubjects, and must strive to keep union among them. 

"4th. Punishment is not less necessary than reward. The former restrainsevil; the latter promotes good. 

"5th. Sound reason teaches that especial regard should be had to thefitness of candidates to public offices; but, though piety and honestygo to form the greatest merit, yet, as the appearance of these virtuesis often imposed on us for the reality, no tree should be severelyjudged till he gets into office, when he will show himself what he is. 

"6th. To make a treasurer of a poor man, or a bankrupt, is to make ahungry wolf purveyor of the kitchen. The case of a rich miser is stillstronger; the bankrupt or the penniless may set bounds to theirpeculation; the miser never has enough. 

"7th. When the prevalence of vice renders a reformation necessary, greatcare and deliberation must be used; to banish at once, and in a mass, old and rooted faults, would be like prescribing laxative andrestringent medicines at the same time to an invalid. 

"8th. They who boldly promise everything, and take upon themselves manyduties, are either fools who know not their own powers or the importanceof affairs, or are mean and unjust citizens who regard their own and nottheir country's welfare. "

[Illustration]

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CHAPTER VIII. 

THE ACADEMIES OF POTU. 

In this kingdom are three academies; one in Potu, one in Keba, and onein Nahami. 

The sciences taught in them are history, political economy, mathematics, and jurisprudence. Their theological creed is so short that it can bewritten on two pages. It contains this doctrine simply, that God, thecreator of all things, shall be loved and honored; and that He will, inan other life, reward us for our virtues and punish us for our vices. Theology forms no part of an academical course, as it is forbidden bylaw to discuss these matters. Neither is medicine numbered among thestudies; for, as the trees live moderately, there is no such thing asinternal disease. 

The students are employed in solving complicated and difficultquestions, and he who most elegantly and clearly explains his question, is entitled to a reward. No one studies more than one science, and thuseach gets a full knowledge of his peculiar subject. 

The teachers themselves are obliged to give, each year, a proof of theirlearning. The teachers of philosophy are required to solve some problemin morals; the historians, to _elaborate_ some passage in history; thejurists, to elucidate some intricate point of law; these last are theonly professors expected to be good orators. I told them that the studyof rhetoric was common to all students in our colleges, and that allstudies were merged in it. They disapproved of this, saying, that shouldall mechanics strive to make a masterly shoe, the work of most would bebad, and the shoemakers alone would win the prize. 

Besides these academies, there are preparatory gymnasiums, where greatpains are taken to discover the bent of the young, that they may bebrought up in that science to which they are best fitted. While I was atthe seminary of Keba, the bishop had four sons there, preparing for amilitary course; four others, whose father was a counsellor, werelearning mechanical arts, and two maidens were studying navigation. Therank and sex of the scholars are entirely overlooked, in their regard tofitness and propriety. 

He who challenges another to fight, loses forever his right to useweapons, and is condemned to live under guardianship, as one who cannotcurb his passions or temper his judgment. I observed that the names ofparties who go to law, are kept secret from the judge, he not being aninhabitant of the place where the trial is carried on. The object ofthis singular law is to prevent all partiality and bribery on the partof the judge, by withholding from him all knowledge of the influence orproperty of the litigants. 

Justice is executed without regard to persons. The king, indeed, is notrequired to appear in court, but after death, his memory is put to thebar of public opinion, and his life is vindicated or condemned throughthe peoples' advocates. This trial takes place before the Senate, andjudgment is freely pronounced according to the weight of the evidence. Aherald proclaims the decision, which is inscribed on the king'smonument. The words used in these trials are: Praiseworthy, --good, --notbad, --moderate, --tolerable. Sentence must be pronounced by one of thesewords. 

The Potuans give the following reason for this custom. The living kingcannot be brought to justice without causing rebellion. As long as helives, the people owe to him blind obedience and constant reverence. Butwhen the king is dead, the bond between them is dissolved, and, hismemory belonging to them, they are bound to justify it as his virtuesand vices principally affected themselves. 

[Illustration]

The Potuanic annals show that for centuries only one king has receivedthe last degree of judgment--tolerable--or, in their tongue:_Rip-fac-si_. This was King _Mikleta_. Although the Potuans are wellversed in arms, and defend themselves bravely, when attacked, theynever make war on others. 

But this king excited by a miserable desire to extend the borders of hisempire, entered into an offensive war with his neighbors, and subduedmany of them. 

The Potuans gained, indeed, in power and wealth, but they suffered morefrom the loss of friendship and the increase of fear and envy in theconquered. The honorable regard for justice and equity, to which theyhad hitherto owed their prosperity and supremacy, began from that timeto fade. On the death of Mikleta, however, the people recovered fromtheir folly, and showed their regret for it, while at the same time theyregained the good will of their neighbors, by putting a blot upon thememory of their ruler. 

But, to return to myself. I took but little pleasure in associating withmy companions, a set of absurd trees, who constantly ridiculed me for myquick perception. 

This quality, I have already said, I was blamed for, very early in mycareer but by learned trees, with grave and dignified complaisance. These saplings, on the contrary, pestered me with silly nicknames. Forexample, they took a malicious delight in calling me Skabba, which meansan untimely or unripe thing. 

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CHAPTER IX. 

THE JOURNEY AROUND THE PLANET NAZAR. 

I had now performed the toilsome duties of a courier for two years, having been every where with orders and letters. I was tired of thistroublesome and unbecoming business. I sent to the king petition afterpetition, asking for my discharge, and soliciting for a more honorableappointment. But I was repeatedly refused, for his majesty did not thinkmy abilities would warrant promotion. He condescended to refer me to thelaws and customs, which allowed those only to be placed in respectableand important offices, who were fitted for them by talent and virtue. It was necessary, he continued, that I should remain where I was, till Icould, by my merits, pave my way to distinction. He concluded thus:

 Study to know yourself, is wisdom's rule; The wise man reasons, --blunders, still, the fool. Strive not with feeble powers great weights to move, Before your shoulders long experience prove. 

I was thus obliged to remain, as patiently as I could, in my oldservice, amusing myself in thinking how to bring my talents to thelight. In my continual journeys about the country, I studied the natureof the people, the quality of the soil; and, in short, became accuratelyacquainted with every thing worthy of observation. That I might notforget any thing, I used myself to write notes of each journey. Thesenotes I enlarged afterwards, as well as I could, and was thus enabled todeliver to the king a volume of considerable size. 

I soon observed that this work was far from being displeasing to hismajesty. He read it through with attention, and then recommended it tothe senate with much ceremony. It was soon determined that I should bemade use of to discover and make known whatever there was of interestthroughout the planet. Truly! I expected some other reward for mysleepless nights and laborious days, than still greater burthens, stillheavier travail. But I could only in silence sigh with the poet:

 "Alas! that Virtue should be praised by all, -- Should warm, with its mild beams, all hearts: Yet mock and freeze its owner. "

However, as I have always had a great desire to see and hear every thingnew, and expected, withal, a magnificent reward from the reallykind-hearted king on my return, I set about this work with a kind ofpleasure. 

Although the planet Nazar is but about six hundred miles incircumference, it seems, to the trees, of vast extent, principally onaccount of their slow movement. No Potuan could go round it in less timethan two years, whereas, I, with my long legs, could traverse it easilyin two months. 

I set out on this journey in the Poplar month. 

Most of the things which I shall now relate, are so curious, that thereader may be easily brought to believe them to be written from merewhim, or at least to be poetical contrivance. The physical and moraldiversities are so many and so great, on this planet, that a man who hasonly considered the difference between the antipodal nations of theearth, can form but a faint idea of the same. It must be observed thatthe nations of Nazar are divided by sounds and seas, and that this globeis a kind of Archipelago. 

It would be wearisome to relate all my adventures, and I shall limit myremarks to those people who seemed to me the most remarkable. 

The only things which I found in common with all, were figure andlanguage. All were trees. But in customs, gestures, and sense, so greatwas the diversity, that each province appeared like a new world. 

In Quamso, the province next to Potu, the inhabitants are entirely oaktrees. They know not of bodily weakness or disease, but arrive inperfect and continued health to a very great age. They seem to be themost fortunate of all creatures; but I found, after some intercoursewith them, that this assumption was a great mistake. Although I neversaw any of them sad, yet none appeared to be happy. The purest heavenis never impressive, but after a storm; so happiness is not appreciatedby these oaks, because it is never interrupted; they bless not health, because they are never sick. They spend their lives in tame anduninterrupted indifference. Possessed of little politeness and goodnessof heart, their conversation is cold and cheerless; their manners stiffand haughty. Without passions, they are crimeless; without weakness, they are pitiless. 

Those alone to whom pain and sickness bring the remembrance of theirmortality, learn in their own sufferings, to sympathise with andcompassionate the woes of others. 

I was now in a land, where I had a living proof of how much theoccurrence of pain and the fear of death tend to produce mutual love andcheerful converse among fellow beings. Here, for the first time, I cameto know the folly and sin of grumbling at the Creator, for bringing uponus trouble and suffering, which are really good for us, and whichproduce the happiest consequences. 

The province Lalak, which is sometimes called Maskatta, or the BlessedLand, was the next in the order of my journey. This land is veryappropriately named. All things spring forth spontaneously:

 Here, between melon vines and moist strawberry, Flow milky brooks and amber streams of mead; There, luscious wine, from crystal, spouts more merry, As Bacchus from his slumber had been freed. Far down along the mountain's verdant side, The limpid juice, with golden lustre, ripples. In dales, soft undulating, oozing glide Sweet waters, out of teeming nature's nipples; And trees of Paradise their branches reach, Bending with purple plum and mellow peach. From all the land nutritious savors rise, To bless its sons, then mount to scent the skies. 

These advantages do not, by any means, make the inhabitants happy. Itoccurred to me, that laborers in harsher climates are much better offthan these people, who necessarily languish in idleness and luxury. 

Next to Lalak is Mardak, inhabited by cypresses. Of these are differentdescents or races, determined by the number or shape of their eyes. Hereis a list of the varieties:

Nagiri, who have oblong eyes; to whom all objects appear oblong. 

Naquire, whose eyes are square. 

Palampi, who have very small eyes. 

Jaraku, with two eyes, which are turned in opposite directions. 

Mehanki, with three eyes. 

Panasuki, with four eyes. 

Harramba, whose eyes occupy the whole forehead; and finally, Skodolki, who have a single eye in the neck. 

The most numerous and powerful of these races, are the Nagirians. Kings, senators and priests are always chosen from this class. None areadmitted to any office, but those who acknowledge and testify by oath, that a certain table, dedicated to the sun and placed in the temple, isoblong. This table is the holiest object of mardakanic worship. Theoath, to be taken by aspirants to honors, is as follows:

"Kaki manaska quihampu miriac jakku, mesimbrii caphani crukkia, manaskarquebriac krusondora. "

In English:

"I swear, that the holy table of the sun seems oblong to me, and Ipromise to remain in this opinion until my last breath. "

When the neophyte, of either class, has sworn this oath, he is taken upamong the Nagirians, and is qualified for any office. On the day aftermy arrival, as I walked in the market-place, I met a party bearing anold man to the whipping post. I asked them the nature of his offence, and was told that he was a heretic, who had publicly declared that theholy table of the sun appeared square to him. 

I immediately entered the temple, being curious to know whether or notmy eyes were orthodox. The table was certainly square to my view, and Isaid so to my landlord, on my return. This tree, who had been recentlyappointed a church-warden, drew a deep sigh on this occasion, andconfessed that it also seemed square to him, but that he dared notexpress such an opinion, openly, from fear of being ejected from office, if not worse. 

Trembling in every joint, I quietly left this region, fearful that myback might suffer on account of my heterodox vision. 

The duchy of Kimal is considered the mightiest and richest of the stateson this planet. There are numberless silver mines within its borders:the sand of its rivers is colored by gold, and its coasts are paved withpearl oysters of the finest water. 

The people of this province, nevertheless, are more miserable than thoseof any other I visited. They are miners, gold-strainers andpearl-divers, condemned to the most infamous slavery, drenched in water, or secluded from air and light, and all for the sake of dear gain. Howstrange and senseless is the lust for brilliant baubles!

The possessors of wealth are obliged to keep a continual watch overtheir property, for the land is full of robbers. None can travel withoutan armed retinue. Thus, this people, on which their neighbors look withlonging eyes, should deserve pity rather than excite envy. Fear, mistrust and jealousy rage in all hearts: each regards his neighbor asan enemy. Sorrows and terrors, sleepless nights, pale faces andtrembling hands are the fruits of that very wealth, which theirneighbors look upon as the greatest good. 

My wanderings through Kimal were the most unpleasant and dangerous inall my experience. My course was towards the east. I journeyed amongmany people, who were generally polite and social, but whose customswere not singular enough to merit particular attention. I had much causeto wonder, when I came among the Quambojas, in whom nature was entirelyperverted. The older these people grow, the more lustful they become. Rashness, lasciviousness and roguery increase with years. None aresuffered to hold offices after the fortieth year. At this age, thewildness and moral insensibility of boyhood begins; the sports ofchildhood, only, are tolerated. The tree becomes a minor, and is placedunder the guardianship of his younger relations. 

I did not think it advisable to remain long in Quamboja, where in a fewyears, I should be sentenced to become a child again. 

I witnessed a perversion of a different kind in Kokleku. In the formerprovince, nature is the agent of this perversion; here the law is theagent. The Koklekuans are juniper trees. 

The males alone cook and perform all domestic duties. In time of war, they serve in the army, but always in the ranks. To the females, areentrusted all civil, divine and military offices. The females reasonthus: The males are endowed with greater bodily strength, and greaterpowers of endurance; therefore, it is clear that nature intended them todo all the work. But this will keep them so busy, that they will nothave time to think. Moreover, as continual physical labor degrades themind, if they should presume to think, their thoughts would be puerile, and practically useless. Therefore, it is plain, that to the femalesbelongs the direction of affairs. The lady of the house may be found inthe study with books and papers about her, while the master is in thekitchen cooking and washing. 

I saw many mournful effects of this inconsistent custom. 

In other places, females are to be found, who bring their chastity tomarket and trade with their charms. Here the young males sell theirnights, and for this end congregate in certain dwellings, before whichsigns are hung out. When these males get to be too troublesome, they arepunished as prostitutes are, elsewhere. Females stroll about thestreets, beckon to the men, stare at them, whistle and cry psh! tothem; chuckle them under the chin and do all manner of tricks, withoutthe least sense of shame. These females boast of their victories, asdandies, with us, plume themselves on their intimacy with ladies, whoseonly favor may have been a sharp box on the ear. None are here blamedfor besieging a young male with love letters and presents. But a youngfellow would be looked upon as having outraged all decency, should hestammer out a faint yes, to the first entreaty of a young female. 

At the time I was in the country a terrible commotion arose on accountof the violation of a senator's son by a young virgin. She was generallycondemned for this high-handed and abominable action. The friends of theyouth insisted that she should be prosecuted, and if the crime wereproved, sentenced to mend the young fellow's honor by marrying him, especially as it could be sworn to that he had lived a pure and virtuouslife till this libertiness had seduced him. 

Blessed Europe! I exclaimed on this occasion; thrice blessed France andEngland! where the names--weaker sex--frail vessels--are no idlenames:--where the wives are so entirely subjected to their husbands thatthey seem to be rather machines or automatons than creatures endowedwith free will and noble aspirations!

The most splendid building in Kokleku is the Queen's harem, in whichthree hundred beautiful young fellows are shut up for life. So jealousis the queen, that no female is allowed to approach the walls within onehundred yards. Never beholding any of their race but the queen and a fewdried-up and ugly spinsters, the poor creatures vegetate, mindless andjoyless. 

Having heard, accidentally, that my form had been praised in thepresence of the queen, I hastily escaped from this unnatural andexecrable land:

 --Fear to my feet gave wings. 

Continuing my course still to the east, I came to thephilosophical-land, as its inhabitants, who are principally engaged inthe study of philosophy and the sciences, vain-gloriously call it. I hadlong and earnestly wished to see this land, which I enthusiasticallyascribed to be the seat of the muses. 

I hurried on with all possible celerity. But the roads were so full ofstones, holes and bogs, that I was delayed, besmirched, and bruised. However, I endured these troubles patiently, anticipating the delightsthat awaited me, and well knowing that the path to paradise is not overroses. When I had struggled onward for an hour I met a peasant, of whom, after saluting him, I demanded how far distant the borders of Maskattiawere? "You should rather ask, " he replied, "how far you must goback;--for you are now in the very middle of it!"

In great astonishment I asked, "How is it, that a land inhabited by purephilosophers, should appear like the abode of wild animals and ignorantbarbarians?" "Indeed, " said the peasant, "It would look better if thepeople could find time to attend to such trifles. At present they mustbe excused, for they have higher and nobler things in their heads: theyare now speculating about the shortest road to the sun. Nobody can blowand swallow at the same time. "

I understood the meaning of the cunning peasant, and left him, aftergetting the direction to the capital city, Casea. Instead of guards andthe usual collection about the gates of a large town, hens and geesestrutted about at their ease: in the crevices of the gate hungbirds-nests and cobwebs. 

In the streets philosophers and swine were mingled together, and bothclasses being alike filthy, they were only to be distinguished from eachother by form. 

The philosophers wore a kind of cloak, of the color of which I shouldnot dare to give an opinion, so thick was the dirt upon them. I was runinto by one of these wise men, who seemed to be enraptured by somespeculation. 

"I beg pardon, master of arts!" I exclaimed, "may I ask of you the nameof this town?" He stood for some time immovable, with closed eyes; thenrecovering somewhat from his trance, and rolling his eyes upwards, hemuttered: "We are not far from noon!"

This untimely answer, which betrayed a perfect insensibility, convincedme that intelligence resulting from methodical and practical study ispreferable to the torpid insanity incident to much learning. 

I went on, hoping to meet with some sensible animal, or any body ratherthan a philosopher. In the market-place, --a very extensive square, --werea great many statues and pillars, covered with inscriptions. 

I approached one of them to get, if possible, the meaning of thecharacters. While engaged in spelling the words, my back suddenly becamewarm, and immediately after I felt warm water trickling down my legs. Iturned round to discover the fountain of the stream, and, lo! anabstracted philosopher was performing, at ease on my back, the sameoperation that the dogs do against the study. 

This infamous trick excited my wrath, and I gave him a severe blow. 

The philosopher regained his wits at this, and seizing me by the hair, dragged me around the market-place. Our struggles soon brought us bothto the ground. Then a multitude of philosophers came running towards us, and having dragged me from under my opponent, beat me with their stickstill I became senseless. I was then carried to a large house and throwninto the middle of the hall. I now recovered in a measure from my illtreatment. 

On seeing this, the wise man who first insulted me, recommenced to beatme, notwithstanding my prayers for mercy. I now learned that theintensity of no anger can be compared to the philosophical; and that theteachers of virtue and moderation are not called upon to practise thesame. The longer my oppressor beat me, the more did his blood boil. Atlast there came into the hall four sophists, whose cloaks proclaimedthem to be of a different class from my late tyrants. They had somecompassion for me, and soothed the rage of the others. I was taken toanother house, and right glad was I to escape the hands of the bandits, and get among honest people. 

I related to my protectors the cause of the calamity. They laughedheartily at the whole matter, and then explained to me that thephilosopher, absorbed in deep thought, had mistaken me for a pillarbefore which it is customary, on certain natural occasions, to stop. 

Just when I supposed myself in safety. I nearly gave up the ghost fromfear. I was led into a dissecting room, filled with bones and deadbodies, the stench from which was intolerable. 

After languishing in this disgusting den for half an hour, the lady ofthe house brought in my dinner, which she had prepared herself. She wasvery polite and amiable; but looked at me closely, and sighedcontinually. I asked the reason of her sorrow. She answered, "that shebecame sick when she thought of what I was to suffer. "

"You have, indeed, " she said, "come among honest people, for my husband, who lives in this house, is a doctor of medicine, and the others are hiscolleagues: but your uncommon figure has awakened their curiosity, andthey have determined to take your internal structure into closeconsideration. In fine, they intend to cut you up, in the hope offinding some new phenomena in anatomy. " I was thunder-struck at hearingthese tidings. I cried out indignantly:

"How can people be called honest, madam! who entertain strangers only tocut them up?"

"You should stick your fingers in the ground, " she replied, "and smellthe land you have got into!" I begged her with tears in my eyes tointercede for me. She answered, "My intercession would be of no serviceto you: but I will endeavor to save you by other means. " She then tookmy hand, carefully led me out by a back door, and guided me to the citygate. 

Here I would have taken leave of my kind and gentle guide; but whilemanifesting my gratitude in the most lively expressions, she suddenlyinterrupted my speech and signified her intention not to leave me till Ishould be in perfect safety. She would not be persuaded to return. Wewalked on together. Meanwhile she entertained me with just and sensibleremarks on the customs and follies of the people. Afterwards she turnedthe discourse to more delicate matters. We were at some distance fromthe city. My soft companion adverted to the danger from which she hadsaved me, and suddenly demanded of me, in return, a politeness which wasmorally impossible. 

She told me with much feeling and warmth of the unfortunate fate offemales in this land:--that the philosophers, entirely absorbed by theirspeculations, and buried among their books, neglect to an alarmingextent, the duties of marriage. "Yes, " she continued, "I can swear toyou, that we should be wholly undone if some polite traveller did notoccasionally take pity on our miserable condition, and mitigate ourtorments. "

I pretended not to understand her meaning, and showed the usualcommon-place and complacent sympathy. 

But my coolness was as oil to the flame. I increased my pace. The poorlady, whose heart had hitherto been subjected to the sweet-smilinggoddess, now changed to a fury. 

I fled from my new danger. Fear and length of legs enabled me tooutstrip her. Mingled with her shrieks, opprobrious epithets fell fast;the last I could distinguish were: _Kaki Spalaki_:--ungrateful hound!

I passed on to other provinces, in which I found but little uncommon andpeculiar. 

I now thought that I had seen all the wonders of Nazar. But when I cameto the land of Cabac, more curious and more incredible things weredisclosed to my gaze. Among the Cabacans there is a certain classwithout heads. These are born without that appendage. They speak througha hole in the middle of the breast. On account of this natural defect, they are generally excluded from offices where brains are thought to beuseful. They are notwithstanding a serviceable class: the most of themare to be seen at court; being gentlemen of the bed-chamber, stewards ofthe household, keepers of the harem, &c. 

Beadles, vestry-clerks and such brainless officers are chosen from thisclass. 

Occasionally one of them is taken up into the senate, either by theparticular favor of government, or through the influence of friends. This is done, generally, without injury to the country; for it is wellknown that the business of the country is carried on by a few senators, and that the rest are only useful to fill the seats, and agree andsubscribe to the determinations of the leaders. 

The inhabitants of the two provinces, Cambara and Spelek, are all limetrees. But their resemblance ends in form. The Cambarans live only aboutfour years. The Spelekians, on the other hand, attain to the wonderfulage of four hundred years. 

In the former place, the people have their full growth a few weeks afterbirth, and finish their education before the first year. During thethree remaining years they prepare for death. The province appeared tobe a true Platonic republic, in which all the virtues reached to theirperfection. The inhabitants, on account of their short lives, are, as itwere, continually on the wing. They regard this life as a gate throughwhich they hastily pass. Their hearts are fixed on the future ratherthan on the present. They may be called true philosophers, for they carenot for luxury and pleasure, but strive through fear of God, virtuousactions, and clear consciences, to make themselves worthy of eternalhappiness. In a word, this land seemed to be the habitation of saintsand angels;--the only school of virtue. 

I was here brought to think of the unreasonableness of those who grumbleat the shortness of life, --those quarrellers with providence! Life canbe called short when passed in luxury and idleness. The shortest life islong when it is well employed. 

In Spelek, on the contrary, all the vices common to erring creaturesseem to be congregated. The people have only the present in their minds, for the future has no sensible vanishing point. Sincerity, honesty, chastity and decency have taken flight to give place to falsehood, lasciviousness, and bad manners. 

I was happy to get away from this province, although I was obliged totraverse desolate and rocky regions which lay beyond it. These desertsseparate Spelek from Spalank, or the "Innocent Land. "

This name is obtained from the meekness and innocence of theinhabitants. These are all stone oaks, and are thought to be thehappiest of all sensible beings. They are not subject to any agitationof mind, and are free from all vices. 

 Free, of compulsion ignorant, did all obey The simple rules of nature. Justice easy And virtue unadorned they practised; for unknown Were punishment and fear. On no holy stone Were menaces engraved: no holy table Declared the thunders of the law. None trembled At the ruler's frown or nod: but, without guard, -- With sharpened steel on shoulder ready poised, -- Or castled wall bristling with murder's tools, Were all ranks safe. On no battle-field Was victor crowned or bloody altar Heaped with his kinsmen's corpses. With sports And pleasant tales, in infant innocence they lived (The innocence that lies in mother's lap unstained. ) Thus passed they from the fond embrace of peace, With easy change to Death's determined grasp. 

When I came to this province, I found that the reputation which thesepeople had gained, namely: that they practised virtue from inclinationrather than from the authority of law--was well founded. 

But as envy and ambition were entirely unknown to them, --the inducementsto excel, and the will for great things were wanting. 

They had no palaces, no courts, no fine buildings. They had nomagistrates to administer law; no avarice to carry them to court. Infine, although without vices, they knew nothing of the arts, --ofsplendid virtues, --nor of any of the things which refine a people. Theyappeared to be rather an oak forest than a sensible and thoughtfulnation. 

I travelled next through the province Kiliak. The natives of thisprovince are born with certain marks on their foreheads, which point outhow long they will live. At first I imagined these people to be happy, as death could never overtake them unexpectedly, nor tear them away inthe midst of their sins. But as each one knows on what day he shalldie, it is usual to postpone repentance till the last hour. They onlyare really pious who begin to sing their death song. 

I saw several move about the streets with drooping heads and miserablelooks--the signs upon their foreheads proclaimed their speedydissolution. 

They counted their remaining hours and minutes upon their fingers, andregarded with horror the rapidity of time. 

The Creator's wisdom and goodness to us in this respect became obviousto me in this land. I could no longer doubt that it is better for us tobe ignorant of the future. 

From Kiliak I sailed over a black sound to the kingdom of Askarak; therenew wonders greeted me. While in Cabac, people are to be seen withoutheads, here, on the contrary, individuals come into the world with sevenheads. These are great universal geniuses. In former times, they wereworshiped with almost divine veneration, and were made senators, chiefmagistrates, &c. As they had as many plans and expedients as heads, theyexecuted with zeal and rapidity many different things, and while thegovernment was in their hands, there was nothing left unchanged. 

But as they made several sets of ideas effective at once, it happened, very naturally, that these ideas came in contact with each other. Atlast, they mingled together so intricately, that the seven-headedgeniuses could not discriminate in from out. The affairs of governmentbecame so disordered that centuries were required to restore them to thesimplicity from which these all-knowing magistrates had brought them. 

A law had been established, before I went there, by which allseven-headed people were excluded from important offices, and theadministration of government was given to simple and ordinary persons, that is, persons with but one head. 

The many-headed now occupy the same places as the headless of Cabac. 

Beyond Askarak, and separated from it by extensive deserts, lays theDuchy of Bostanki. The Bostankins resemble the Potuans in their externalform. Their internal construction is very singular. The heart is placedin the right leg; so that it may be literally said of them, that theirhearts are in their breeches. 

They are notorious for being the greatest cowards among all theinhabitants of Nazar. 

Angry, from faintness and fatigue, I came to a tavern near the citygates. I could not abstain from growling at the landlord because hecould not provide what I called for. The poor fellow fell on his kneesbefore me, begged my pardon amid tears and groans, and held his rightleg towards me that I might feel how his heart beat. 

At this I laughed, and almost forgot to be angry. I wiped the tears fromthe poor sinner's eyes, and told him not to be afraid. He rose up, kissed my hand, and went out to prepare my food. Not long after, I heardlamentable cries and howls in the kitchen. I hastened thither, and to mygreat astonishment, saw the humble and trembling Monsieur poltroonengaged, very valiantly, in beating his wife and servant girls. When heperceived me he took to flight. I turned to the weeping wife and girlsand demanded what could have excited such terrible anger in my lamb-likehost. They stood for some time, silently, with their eyes fixed on theground. At length, the wife replied in the following words: "You do notseem, dear stranger! to have much knowledge of human nature. Thecitizens of this place, who dare not look at an armed enemy, and, at theleast noise, creep like mice into holes, hector in the kitchens, andtyrannize over us feeble women. "

Thoroughly disgusted by the mean and cowardly spirit of this people, Ihired a boat to go to Mikolak. On landing I missed my outer coat, whichI recollected to have put in the boat at starting. After quarrelling along time with the boatman, who denied all knowledge of it, I went to amagistrate, and related the whole matter to him. I asserted that I hadat least a right to demand my own property, if I could not sue at lawone with whom I had entrusted my goods. 

The boatman still denied the theft, and required that I should bepunished for wrongly accusing him. In this doubtful case, the courtdemanded witnesses. This demand I could not answer, but proposed that myopponent should take oath on his innocence. 

At this proposal the judge smiled and said: "In this land, my friend, there is no weight in religious confirmation. The laws are our gods. Proof must, therefore, be given in a formal manner, by witnesses orwritten documents. Whoever cannot do this not only lose their case, butare subject to punishment for malicious accusation. Prove your case bywitnesses, and you will get your own again. " I lost my case, but fromregard to the hospitality due to strangers, was not punished. 

I had far more reason to pity this people than to regret my own loss. How weak is that society which relies for its safety on bare human laws. It is like a city built on a volcanic mountain! Little firmness has thatpolitical structure which rests not on the foundation of religion. 

Leaving this atheistic land, I crossed a very high mountain to Bragmat, which lays in a dale at the foot of the mountain. The people of thiscity are juniper trees. The first that I met rushed towards me, andpressing with the weight of his body, felled me to the ground. When Idemanded the reason of this rough salutation, he begged my pardon in themost polite and elegant expressions. A few minutes after, anotherstruck me in the side with a hedge-pole, and likewise excused hiscarelessness in a pretty speech. I thought they must be blind, and gaveto all I passed a very wide berth. 

I was afterwards informed that some among them were possessed of a verysharp sight, so that they can behold objects far beyond the view ofothers, but they could not see what was directly before them. Thesesharp-sighted people are called Makkati, and are, most of them, adeptsin astronomy and transcendental philosophy. 

I passed through several other provinces, in which I found nothingworthy to be recorded in this history; and returned to Potu after anabsence of two months. 

I entered the city of Potu on the tenth day of the Ash month. The firstthing I did was to deliver my journal to the king, who ordered it to beprinted. 

It must be observed that the art of printing, which both the Europeansand Chinese claim to have invented, has been well known in Nazar forages. The Potuans were so much pleased with my book that they were nevertired of reading it. Little trees carried it about the streets andcried: "Court-footman Skabba's Travels around the Globe. "

Puffed up by my success, I now strove for higher things, and awaited, somewhat impatiently, an appointment to a great and respectable office. My expectations not being answered, I gave in a new petition, in which Ieulogized my work and claimed a suitable reward for my uncommon merit. 

The mild and beneficent king was moved by my prayers, and promised tokeep me in gracious remembrance. 

He kept his promise, but not to my liking, for his grace consisted onlyin making an addition to my stipend. 

I had pointed my nose another way, but not daring to press the king withmore petitions, I made my complaint to the great chancellor. This verysensible personage listened to me with his usual urbanity, and promisedto serve me. At the same time he advised me to abandon my unreasonabledesires, and take a more exact view of my weak judgment and generalinsignificance. "Nature, " he said, "has been a step-mother to you; youwant, altogether, the talents which clear the road to important offices. You must creep before you walk; and it is foolish to think of flyingwithout wings. " He acknowledged my merits: "But, " he continued, "it isnot such merits as yours that will give you admittance to State affairs. If all merit should give this right, then every painter and sculptor, this for his skill in carving, that for his knowledge of colors, mightdemand a seat at the council board. Merit ought to be rewarded, but thereward should be adapted to the object, that the State may not suffer. "

This speech struck me, and had the effect to keep me very quiet for sometime. But I could not endure the thought of growing grey in my baseemployment. I determined on the desperate attempt, which I had formerlyconsidered, to improve the constitution, and thus, by a bold stroke, toadvance my own and the country's welfare. 

Shortly before my journey I had strictly examined the internal conditionof the kingdom, to discover the least failing in its machinery, and thebest means to remedy it. 

In the province Kokleku I had learnt that the government waggles inwhich women have a part. For being by nature vain, they strive to extendtheir power in every conceivable direction, and stop not till they haveprocured for themselves perfect and unlimited dominion. 

I concluded, therefore, to propose the exclusion of the fair sex fromall public offices, and trusted to get a sufficiency of voices on myside by placing the case in its best light. It seemed an easy matter, tome, to convince the male sex of the dangers to which they were exposed, if they did not, in time, weaken this female power. 

I executed this plan with all the art I was possessed of, supporting itwith the most cogent reasons, and sent it to the king. 

He, who had given me many proofs of his favor, was astonished at thismiserable and impertinent project, as he graciously called it, and said, that it would fall out to my destruction. 

But relying partly on my reasonings and partly on the support of thewhole male population, I held obstinately to my plan. According to law, I was led to the market-place with a rope about my neck, to await thedecision of the Council. When the counsellors had given their votes, the sentence was sent to be subscribed by the king, which being done, itwas publicly read by a herald, as follows:

"On mature consideration we adjudge, that the proposal made by Sr:Skabba, first court-footman to his majesty, to exclude the second sexfrom public offices, cannot be accepted, without affecting the peace andorder of the kingdom: since the women, who form the half of ourpopulation, would naturally be excited by this innovation, and therebybecome hostile and troublesome to the government. Furthermore, we holdit to be unjust to deny, to trees of excellent qualities, admission tooffices of which they have hitherto shown themselves to be worthy andespecially it is incredible, that nature, which does nothinginconsiderately, should have idly endued them with superior and variedgifts. We believe the welfare of the kingdom requires that a regardshould be had to fitness rather than to names, in the disposal ofoffices. As the land is not seldom in need of capable subjects, wepronounce a statute which should declare an entire half of theinhabitants, merely from birth, unworthy of and useless in affairs, tobe deplorable. 

"After grave deliberation we declare this to be justice: let theaforesaid Skabba, for his no less despicable than bold proposal, sufferthe usual punishment in such cases. "

The good king took my misfortune to heart, but did not seek to changethe resolution of the Council. As a matter of form he signed the warrantfor my execution. Yet with his characteristic mildness, and inconsideration of my having been born and educated in a strange world, where a quick and reckless head is thought to be a blessing, he commutedmy punishment to imprisonment till the beginning of the Birch month, when, with other animals, I should be banished to the firmament. Whenthis sentence was published, I was sent to prison. 

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

CHAPTER X. 

THE VOYAGE TO THE FIRMAMENT. 

Twice a year, some very large birds, called Kupakki or post birds, arewont to show themselves on the planet Nazar. 

They come and go at certain regular periods, which has given rise tovarious opinions. Some think, that insects, of which great multitudesappear at the same periods, and which the birds are very fond of eating, entice them down to the planet. This is my own notion. The circumstance, that when these insects disappear, the birds return to the firmament, places the opinion almost beyond all doubt. It is the same instinct, which leads certain species of birds on our earth to migrate at regularperiods. 

Others believe, that these birds are trained like hawks and other birdsof prey, to fetch booty from other lands. This conjecture is groundedupon the great care with which they lay down their burdens, when theirflight is finished. This supposition is somewhat strengthened by thefact, that they become tame and gentle just before they begin theirflight, suffering themselves to be thrown into nets, under which theylie immovable. Meanwhile they are fed with insects till the regularperiod arrives. Then a long box, just large enough to hold a tree orman, is fastened to a rope, which is again tied to the legs of the bird. On the banishment day, food is withheld from them, the nets are raised, and the kupakkis wing their way to the firmament. 

Two citizens of Potu had been doomed to banishment with myself. One wasa metaphysician, who had offended the law by making some sage remarksupon the nature of spirits; the other was a fanatic, who, by startingdoubts concerning the holiness of religion and the uniting force of thecivil law, was suspected to have designed the overthrow of both. Thislatter would not regulate himself by the public ordinances, because, hesaid, all civil obedience was inconsistent with his conscience. Thusthree of us, namely, a project-maker, a metaphysician, and a fanatic, were, on the first day of the Birch month, shut up in boxes. 

I never knew what became of my fellow-sufferers. As for myself, I wasenclosed, with food sufficient for a few days. Shortly after, mykupakki, finding nothing to eat, started off with amazing speed. 

It is generally believed, under ground, that the distance between theplanet Nazar and the firmament is about four hundred miles. I had nomeans of determining how long my passage was, but conjectured it to beabout twenty-four hours. 

I heard nothing, during this time, but the heavy and monotonous flappingof the kupakki's wings. At last, there sounded in my ears a confoundingnoise, which announced that we could not be far from land. 

I now observed that the bird had really been trained, for he set thebox, with so much care on the ground, that I did not feel the slightestjar. The box was immediately opened, and I rose up in the midst of agreat multitude of monkeys, who, to my astonishment, conversed togetherin an intelligent language rather than chattered, and walked to and fro, in measured and dignified paces. They were dressed in cloths of variedcolors. A number of them advanced towards me with much politeness, andhanded me from the box. 

They seemed to be surprised at my figure, particularly when theydiscovered I had no tail. Their amazement was not at all lessened by thefact, that I resembled them (laying aside the tail) more nearly than didany stranger they had hitherto seen. 

At the time of my arrival the water was very high, owing to the nearnessof Nazar. This planet has the same effect upon the tides of thefirmament, as our moon has upon those of the earth. 

I was led to a very large building, ornamented in the richest style. Thepresence of a guard at the door convinced me that it was the residenceof no common monkey. It was, as I afterwards learnt, the residence ofthe mayor of the monkeys. 

A number of teachers were selected to instruct me in their language. 

In three months I was enabled to speak with considerable readiness. ThenI expected to procure for myself the admiration of all, for my promptingenuity and superior memory. But my teachers declared me to besluggish and dull of apprehension, and in their impatience oftenthreatened to abandon their charge. As, on the planet Nazar, I had beenironically named Skabba, or the untimely, for my quick perceptions, sohere I was called Kakidoran, which signifies, idle and stupid. Thoseonly are respected here, who can comprehend and express any thinginstantaneously. I amused myself during the course of my studies bywalking about the city, in which I met on all sides notable signs ofsplendor and luxury. 

When I had finished my education, that is, when I could speak fluently, I was carried to the capital city Martinia, from which the whole countrytakes its name. The object of the mayor evidently was, to insinuatehimself into the favor of a certain counsellor, by presenting to him astrange and unprecedented animal. 

The government of Martinia is aristocratical. The state is administeredby a great council, selected from the body of the old nobility. 

Before proceeding to the house of the lord, to whom I was to be offered, the mayor led me to a hotel, where we could make ourselves presentableto his excellency. Several servants, called maskatti, or dressers, joined us for this purpose. One took the mayor's sword to burnish it;another tied different colored bands to his tail. I will here remark, that nothing lays nearer to a monkey's heart than the adornment of histail. 

When my conductor was polished, dressed and adorned, we departed for thepresident's palace, followed by three servants. 

On coming to the entrance, the mayor loosed his shoes, that he might notsoil the marble floor. After waiting for a long time, with not a littleimpatience, we were suffered to enter the reception hall. Here thepresident sat in a golden chair. 

As soon as he saw us, the president burst out in a terrific laugh. Iconcluded either that he was seized by delirium, or that silly andinsane laughter was a peculiarity of great people in Martinia. In short, I took his lordship to be a fool. 

I afterwards expressed this opinion to the mayor; but he assured me thatthe president was a monkey of remarkable natural powers; that his mindwas so comprehensive, that he not only determined matters of the highestimportance at table, with his glass in hand, but even wrote or dictateda new statute between the courses. 

His excellency tattled to me half an hour, his tongue wagging, thewhile, with an agility immeasurably superior to that of our Europeanbarbers. 

Then turning to my companion, he said, he would take me among hissubordinate attendants, since he perceived, from my sluggishdisposition, that I must have been born in the land of stupidity, where

 Long-eared mortals, in perpetual fogs, Oft lose their way to mire in horrid bogs:--

and consequently that I was unfit for any office of trust andrespectability. "I have, indeed, " urged the mayor, "observed a naturalobtuseness in this man; nevertheless, when he is allowed time to think, he judges by no means badly. "

"Of what use is that, " replied the president; "here we need nimbleofficers, for the immense diversity of our affairs does not give us timeto think. "

The president, having spoken thus, very gravely, and carefully examinedmy body, and directed me to lift a heavy weight from the floor. Seeingthat I did this with ease, he remarked: "Nature, although she hasstinted you in the faculties of the soul, has compensated, in somemeasure, by granting to you a degree of bodily strength. "

I now received orders to go out and wait in the court. Soon after themayor followed, and as he passed, told me that his excellency haddetermined to include me in his train. 

I concluded from his lordship's undervaluing opinion of me, that mysituation could not be very elevated; still, I was curious to know myfate, and therefore asked the mayor if he knew what I was to beentrusted with. The mayor answered: "His excellency, with special grace, has appointed you for his chief porteur, [1] with a yearly pay oftwenty-five stercolatus. " (A stercolatu is about one dollar of ourmoney. ) "Furthermore, he will not require your services for any buthimself and her grace, his lady. " This answer was like a thunder-stroketo me; but I was sensible that it was useless to object. 

I was carried to a chamber, where a supper of dried fruits was laid;after eating a little, my bed was pointed out to me. 

I threw myself upon the bed, but my mind was so agitated, that I couldnot for a time close my eyes in sleep. The pride and contempt with whichthe monkeys regarded me, provoked me almost to rage. A more than Spartanpatience was needed to listen with indifference to their sneers. At lastI slumbered. How long I know not, for in the firmament there is nodivision of night and day. It is never dark, except at a certain period, when the planet Nazar comes between the firmament and the subterraneansun. 

On awakening, I found at my side a mean looking monkey, who assertedthat he was my colleague: He had brought with him a false tail, which hefixed upon me, and then tied to it some ribbons of various colors. Hetold me that in half an hour the president would be ready to set out forthe Academy, and that I must prepare myself to begin my duties. Theceremony of promoting a doctor was to take place. 

We bore the president to the Academy in a golden sedan, and weresuffered to remain in the hall during the performance. 

At the entrance of the president, all the doctors and masters of artrose and turned their tails towards him. To a dweller on the earth, suchsalutations would probably have appeared unseemly and ridiculous, assuch a movement with us is expressive of indifference or dislike. 

But every land has its own customs. I have seen so many strangeceremonies and varied usages, that I have come to observe, rather thanlaugh at them. 

The act of promotion, on this occasion, was performed with the followingceremonies. The candidate was placed in the middle of the hall. Thenthree officers, each with a pail of cold water, approached him withmeasured steps. Each in turn dashed his bucket of water in thecandidate's face. The sufferer is obliged to receive this bath withoutdistorting his countenance, on pain of forfeiting his degree. Odorousoils were then sprinkled over him, and finally a powerful vomit wasgiven to him. When this last dose had produced its usual effect upon thecandidate, he was pronounced to be a lawfully graduated doctor. 

I turned to a learned doctor, who stood near me, and humbly asked himthe meaning of all I had seen. 

First expressing his pity for my ignorance, the sneering pedantcondescended to inform me, that the ceremony of the water wassignificant of the preparation for a new course of life and duty; theointment, of elevation above the mass; and the vomit, of theextermination of prejudice and error. 

I fancied, but I did not say so, that my dignified instructor in themysteries needed a fresh vomit. 

The Martinianic religion is not at all practical. There are two hundredand thirty speculations concerning the form and being of God, and threehundred and ninety-six of the nature and qualities of the soul. Thereare many churches and theological seminaries, but in neither is taughtthe way to live and die well. The people are all critics, who go to beamused by the art and delicacy of the holy teachers. The more obscureand involved the propositions of their preachers, the more are theypraised. The Martinians are indifferent to every thing they can easilyunderstand. 

Martinia is the paradise of project-makers. The more inconsistent anduseless a scheme, the surer is it of general approbation. 

When I once spoke with an enthusiastic monkey, of the earth and itsinhabitants, he fell upon the notion, to bore through to the surface, and make a convenient and easy way of communication. 

He prepared a long and eloquently worded plan on this subject, whichpleased and excited every body. 

A company was formed, and named the "Subterranean Boring Company" itsoriginator, Hiho Pop-coq, was made its president. The stock was seizedon with avidity, and the project was not abandoned until a multitude offamilies had been ruined, and the public affairs brought into thegreatest disorder; and even then the scheme was dropped, less from itssupposed impracticability, than from the length of time required toaccomplish it. 

The author of it was not only left unpunished, but was overwhelmed withthe general applause, for the originality and boldness of his attempt. 

The Martinians are used to console themselves on such occasions, byrepeating the following couplet:

 "The project ended in defeat; The notion was, however, neat. "

When I had thoroughly studied the character of this people, I determinedto take advantage of their weaknesses, and by some outrageous proposal, to gain their respect, and thereby better my condition. 

I revealed my intention to a shrewd old monkey, who encouraged me inthese words:

[Illustration]

 Who would succeed in Martinianic land, Must quit the useful, to propose the grand; Hazard those deeds, that to the gallows pave, Thy fortune's made! Here's honor for the knave. 

After due deliberation, my choice became fixed upon that ornament forthe head, called wigs by us. 

I had previously noticed that the land contained a multitude of goats;with the hair of these creatures I proposed to manufacture my wigs. 

My step-father had been engaged in the trade, and as I had, with theinquisitiveness of youth, observed the process, I could bungle at it. 

I made a goat's-hair wig for myself, and adorned with it, presentedmyself to the president. 

This dignitary was astonished at the new and uncommon decoration. Heseized it from my head, and placing it on his own, hastened in a veryundignified manner to the mirror. 

So enraptured was he at the sight of the pompous protuberance, that heshrieked out: "Divine art, how like a God am I!"--he sent immediatelyfor her Grace to partake in his joy. 

She was not less pleased than her lord. She embraced him, kissed him, and assured him that she had never seen him more handsome. 

The president addressed himself to me with much less haughtiness thanusual. "O Kakidoran!" he exclaimed, "if this discovery of yours pleasesthe Council as well as it does me, your fortune is made. You may hopefor the most honorable reward the State can give. "

I gracefully thanked his Excellency, and immediately wrote a petition, which I requested him to lay before the Council. 

His Excellency took the petition together with the wig, and departed. Iunderstood that all the cases which were to come before the Council onthis day, had been laid aside, so inquisitive were all to hear andexamine my project. The work was accepted, and an appropriate reward wasadjudged to me. I was called up to the council-chamber on my entrance, an old monkey stood up, and, after thanking me in the name of the wholerepublic, proclaimed that my work should be rewarded as its meritsdeserved. He then demanded, what length of time I should need tofabricate another such head ornament? I replied, that it was rewardenough for me, that my curious workmanship had gained the approbation ofthe great men who composed the Council; for the rest, I bound myself tomake another wig in two days, and also to manufacture wigs enough forthe whole city in a month, provided I might count upon the assistance ofa number of monkeys, accustomed to work. This proposal, however, madethe president hot about the ears, and he exclaimed with much eagerness:"It is not fit, my dear Kakidoran, that this ornament should be commonto the whole town, for being worn by all without distinction, it willbecome ordinary and vulgar. The nobility must necessarily bedistinguished from the common people. "

All the members of the Council concurred in his opinion, and the citymarshal was charged to take heed that none might wear wigs, except thenobility. This order having been promulgated, the citizens throngedabout the council-chamber to obtain titles and charters, which somebought with their money and others procured through the influence oftheir friends; so that in a short time full half the city were madenobles. But when petition after petition poured in from the provinces, that the like favor should be extended to them, the Council, beingpossessed with a righteous fear of riot and civil war, finallydetermined to allow every one, without distinction of rank, to wear awig. I thus had the pleasure to see the whole Martinianic nation wiggedbefore I left that country. And, truly, it can scarcely be imagined whata funny and ridiculous appearance the wigged monkeys presented! Thewhole nation made so much of my project and its accomplishment, that anew era was established; and from this time the wig-age commenced in theMartinianic annals. 

In the meantime, I was loaded with praises and panegyrics, wrapped in apurple cloak, and returned from the court-house in the president's ownsedan, the same _porteur_, who had formerly been my companion, servingme now as a horse. From that day I dined continually at the table of hisExcellency. 

With this glittering preamble to my fortunes, I commenced in earnest thework I had promised, and soon finished wigs enough for the wholeCouncil; and after sweating for a month--a patent of nobility wasbrought to me, couched in the following words:

 "In consideration of the most excellent and very useful discovery, through which Kakidoran, born in Europe, has made himself worthy of the gratitude of the whole Martinianic nation, we have resolved to advance him to the rank of nobility, so that he, and all his descendants shall be regarded as true noblemen, and enjoy all the prerogatives and rights, of which the nobility of Martinia are in possession. Furthermore, we have determined to dignify him with a new name; he shall therefore from this day, be no longer called Kakidoran, but Kikidorian. Moreover, since his new dignity requires a richer style of living, we grant him a yearly pension of two hundred patarer. Given in the council-chamber of Martinia, the fourth day of the month Merian, under the great seal of the Council. "

Thus I suddenly became changed from a simple porteur to a respectablenobleman, and lived for a long while in great splendor and honor. Whenit was known that I was high in the favor of the president, everybodysought my good will and protection. It is the fashion among the poets ofMartinia to panegyrize the tails of eminent monkeys, as it is with us toeulogize the beauty of women. Several poets commended the beauty of mytail, although I had none. To say everything on this subject in a fewwords--their fawning servility towards me was so extreme, that a certainman of high rank and station, did not hesitate, nor did he feel himselfshamed, to promise me that his wife should make herself agreeable to mein every possible way, provided that I would recompense him byrecommending him to the president. 

When I had lived in this land for the space of two years, at first a_porteur_ and latterly a nobleman, an incident, entirely unexpected, occurred, which was nearly fatal to me. I had, up to this period, beenin special favor with his Excellency; and her Grace, the president'slady, had evinced so much kindness to me, that I was regarded the firstamong all her favorites. She was distinguished for her virtue; but, whenin the lapse of time, I perceived one after another ambiguity in herexpressions, I began to feel a kind of mistrust, especially when Iobserved that

 Sometimes she'd smile with wanton grace, Then unto sudden tears give place, While gazing, silent, on my face With mild devotion. Her's all the art of tenderness, That pleases while it wounds no less: Her breasts, half-covered, now confess Their strange emotion. Then sighs that can no reason find, Or used to make my reason blind:-- Her hands upon her breast entwined-- Ah, female charms! Her face would lose its rosy hue For lily's, washed in morning dew; Aurora's purple blazed anew, In love's alarms. 

My suspicions finally became certainties, when a chambermaid brought tome, one day, the following note:

 "DEAREST KIKIDORIAN, --

 "The feeling which I owe to my rank and high descent, and the modesty natural to my sex, have until now hindered the sparks of love which have long secretly burned in my bosom, from breaking forth in open flame: but I am weary of the combat, and my heart can no longer resist its bewitching enemy. Have pity for a female, from whom only the utmost degree of burning love could have been able to extort a confession. 

 PTARNNSA. "

I cannot describe how singularly I felt at this entirely unexpecteddeclaration of love: but as I held it far better to expose myself tothe revenge of a furious female, than to sin against the order ofnature, by a shameful intimacy with a creature that did not belong to myrace, I immediately wrote an answer in the following words:

 "GRACIOUS LADY, --

 "The constant favor his Excellency, your husband, has shown to me; the undeserved benefits he has bestowed upon me; the moral impossibility of fulfilling your gracious desires; and many other reasons, that I will not name, move me to submit to the anger of my gracious lady, rather than consent to an action that would stigmatize me as the most ungrateful and the lowest among all two-legged creatures. Besides, what is desired of me, would be more bitter to satisfy than death itself. This action, if I yielded to it, would effect the ruin and dishonor of one of the most respected families in the State, and my willingness would injure, before all others, that person who has desired it. With the most solemn and sincere assurances of gratitude I must here declare, gracious lady, that under no circumstances can I fulfil your wishes in this respect, although to all other commands I promise a blind obedience. 

 KIKIDORIAN. "

Underneath I wrote the following admonition:

 "Think of this heavy sin; Fly ere it be too late: Shall vice, the pander, newly in, Bow virtue to the gate? Let Cupid not ensnare you-- His cunning wiles beware you, The sweets of sin soon vanish-- Its pains, ah! who can banish. "

This letter I sent to the lady, and it had the effect that I expected;her love was changed to the bitterest hatred:--

 In vain her glowing tongue would vie, To tell her frightful agony. Despairing shame her accents clip;-- They freeze upon her snowy lip. No tears did flow; _such_ pain oft dries The blessed current of the eyes: Fell vengeance from her black orbs glanced, While like a fury, she advanced. 

Nevertheless, she restrained her fury, until she recovered thelove-letter she had written to me. As soon as she had secured it, shehired some persons to testify by oath, that, in the absence of hisExcellency, I had attempted to violate her. This fable was representedwith so much art and speciousness, that the president did not doubt itstruth, and I was ordered to be put in prison. In this, my despairingcondition, I saw no other means of deliverance than to confess thecrime, with which I had been charged, and supplicate the president formercy: which being done, my life was conceded, but I was doomed toperpetual imprisonment. My charter of nobility was immediately takenfrom me, and I was sent to the galleys as a slave. My destination was toone of the ships belonging to the republic, which then lay ready to sailfor _Mezendares_, or the Land-of-wonders. Thence were brought the waresthat Martinia cannot produce. This ship, on board of which my evilfortune had now cast me, was propelled both by sails and oars; at eachoar two slaves were chained: consequently I was attached to anotherunfortunate. I was consoled, however, by the prospect of a voyage, during which I hoped to find new food and nourishment for my insatiableinquisitiveness, although I did not believe all that the seamen told ofthe curious things I should see. Several interpreters accompanied us;these being made use of by the Mezendaric merchants in the course oftheir commercial negotiations. 

[Illustration]

CHAPTER XI. 

THE VOYAGE TO THE LAND-OF-WONDERS. 

Before I proceed to the description of this sea-voyage, I must firstcaution all severe and unmerciful critics not to frown too much at thenarration of things, which seem to war against nature, and even surpassthe faculties of faith in the most credulous man. I relate incrediblebut true things, that I have seen with my own eyes. Raw and ignorantninnies who have never started a foot from their homes, regard everything as fable, whose equal they have never heard of or seen; or, withwhich they have not been familiar from childhood. Learned people, onthe contrary, especially those who have a deep knowledge of naturalhistory, and whose experience has proved to them how fruitful nature isin changes, will pass a more reasonable sentence upon the uncommonthings narrated. 

In former days a people were found in Scythia, called Arimasps, who hadbut one eye, which was placed in the middle of the forehead: anotherpeople, under the same climate, had their foot-soles turned outbackwards, and in Albany were people born with gray hairs. The ancientSanromates ate only on every third day and fasted the other two; inAfrica were certain families who could bewitch others by their talk; andit is a well known fact, that there were certain persons in Illyria, with two eye-balls to each eye, who killed people by merely looking atthem: this, however, they could do, only when they were angry; thentheir fierce and scintillating stare was fatal to whomever was rash orunfortunate enough to meet it: on the mountains of Hindostan were to befound whole nations with dog's heads, who barked; and others who hadeyes in their backs. Who would believe this and even more, if Pliny, one of the most earnest writers, had not solemnly assured us, that hehad neither heard nor read the least hereof, but had seen it all withhis own eyes? Yes, who would have imagined that this earth was hollow;that within its circumference were both a sun and moon, if my ownexperience had not discovered the secret? Who would have thought itpossible, that there was a globe, inhabited by walking, sensible trees, if the same experience had not placed it beyond all doubt? Nevertheless, I will not pick a quarrel with any one, on account of his incredulity inthis matter, because I must confess, that I myself, before I made thisvoyage, mistrusted whether these tales might not have arisen from theexaggerated representations of seamen, or that they were the result ofthat well-known qualification of this class of men, familiarly styledthe "spinning a yarn. "

In the beginning of the month Radir, we went on board our ship, weighedanchor, and

 The wind in swelling sails embraced the bending masts, And, like an arrow in the air, with lightning speed, The keel shrieked through the foaming billows. 

The wind was fair for some days, during which we poor rowers had acomfortable time, for the oars were not needed; but on the fourth day itfell calm;

 The sails did fall: in haste the seats were fixed; With plashing stroke, the oars smote heaven in the waters. 

For a long time we met with nothing; but as soon as we lost sight ofland, strange figures raised themselves from the quaking gulph. Theywere mermaids, who, when the weather becomes calm and the billows restthemselves, rise to the surface and swim towards any passing ship, toask for alms. Their language was so similar to the Martinianic, thatsome of our sailors could speak with them without an interpreter. One ofthese singular creatures demanded of me a piece of meat; when I gave itto her, she looked at me steadily for a time, and said: you will soonbecome a hero, and rule over mighty nations! I laughed at thisdivination, for I considered it empty flattery, although the sailorsswore to it, that the mermaids' prediction seldom failed. At the end ofeight days we came in sight of land; which the seamen calledPicardania. As we entered the harbor, a magpie came flying towards us, which, they said, was the custom-house inspector-general. When thisdignitary had flown thrice around the ship, he returned to the shore andcame back with three other magpies: these seated themselves on the prowof the ship. I came very near bursting with laughter, when I saw one ofour interpreters approach these magpies, with many compliments, andheard him hold a long conversation with them. They had come for thepurpose of examining our freight and detecting any forbidden articlesthat we might have concealed; when all was found correct, we weresuffered to unload. As soon as this was done, a number of magpies flewto the ship, who proved to be merchants. The captain then went ashore, accompanied by myself and two monkeys, namely, our supercargo and aninterpreter; after clearing the ship and disposing of the cargo, wereturned, and shortly set sail. 

In three days we reached Music-land. After casting anchor, we went onshore, preceded by one of the interpreters, who carried a bass-viol inhis hand. As we found the whole country about us empty and desolate, discovering no where any trace of living creatures, the captain ordereda trumpet to be sounded, to inform the inhabitants of our arrival. Before the echoes of the blast from the trumpet had subsided, (and theyseemed to penetrate farther and reverberate longer than usual from theperfect stillness of this apparently void region, ) about thirty musicalinstruments came hopping towards us. These were bass-viols. On the verylong neck of each was placed a little head; the body was also small, andcovered by a smooth bark, which, however, did not close entirely aroundthe frame, but was open in front and disposed loosely about them. Overthe navel, nature had built a bridge, above which four strings weredrawn. The whole machine rested on a single leg, so that their motionwas a spring rather than a walk. Their activity was very great, and theyjumped with much agility over the fields. In short, we should have takenthem for musical instruments, as their general appearance purported, ifthey had not had each two arms and hands. In the one hand was a bow, theother was used upon the frets. When our interpreter would converse withthem, he put his viol in its position, and commenced playing an air. They immediately answered him by touching their strings, and thusalternating with each other, a regular musical conversation was carriedon. At first they played only Adagio, with much harmony; then theypassed over to discordant tunes; and finally concluded with a verypleasant and lively Presto. As soon as our people heard this, theyleaped and sung for joy, saying, that the bargain for the wares was nowfixed. Afterwards I learnt that the Adagio, they first played, wasmerely an opening or preface to the conversation, and consisted only ofcompliments; that the discordant tones which followed, were bickeringsand disputes about prices; and, finally, that the sweet sounding Prestoindicated that an agreement had been made. At the conclusion of thesenegotiations, the wares stipulated for were landed. The most importantof these is Kolofonium, with which the inhabitants rub their bows ororgans of speech. 

Late in the month of Cusan, we set sail from Music-land, and after somedays sailing hove in sight of a new land, which, on account of the foulsmell that reached our noses at a great distance, our seamen supposed tobe Pyglossia. 

The inhabitants of this land are not very unlike the human race in theirgeneral appearance; the sole difference being, that these people have nomouth: they speak from the face which turns towards the south when thenose points to the north. The first of them who came on board, was arich merchant. He saluted us after the custom of his nation, by turninghis back towards us, and immediately began to bargain with us for ourwares. I kept myself considerably remote during the negotiation, asneither the sound nor the smell of his speech pleased me. To my greathorror our barber was taken sick at this time, so that I was obliged tosummon a Pyglossian perfume. As the barbers here are quite as talkativeas among us, this one, while shaving me, filled the cabin with sodisagreeable a smell, that, on his departure, we were obliged to smokewith all the incense we had on board. 

We sailed hence to Iceland. This land consisted of desolate rocks, covered by eternal snows. The inhabitants who are all of ice, live hereand there in the clefts of the rocks on the tops of the mountains, wherethe sun is never seen, enveloped by almost perpetual darkness and frost. The only light they have comes from the shining rime. 

These lands, of which I here have given a view, are all subject to thegreat emperor of Mezendora proper, and are therefore called by seafaringpeople the Mezendoric islands. This great and wonderful country, namely, Mezendora, is the goal of all extended voyages. Eight days sail fromIceland brought us to the imperial residence. There we found all thatrealized, which our poets have fancied of the societies of animals, trees and plants; Mezendora being, so to speak, the common father-landof all sensible animals and plants. In this empire each animal and everytree can obtain citizenship, merely by submitting to the government andlaws. One would suppose, that, on account of the mixture of so manydifferent creatures, great confusion would prevail among them: but thisis far from the case. On the contrary, this very difference produces themost happy effects; which must be attributed to their wise laws andinstitutions, decreeing to each subject that office and employment towhich his nature and special faculties are best fitted. Thus, the lion, in consideration of his natural magnanimity, is always chosen regent. The elephant, on account of his keen judgment, is called to sit in theState-council. Courtiers are made of chameleons, because they areinconstant and know how to temporize. The army consists of bears, tigersand other valorous animals; in the marine service, on the contrary, areoxen and bulls; seamen being generally hardy and brave people; butsevere, inflexible, and not particularly delicate in their living, whichcorresponds very well with their element. There is a seminary for thisclass, where calves or sea-cadets are educated for sea-officers. Trees, for their natural discretion and gravity, are usually appointed judges:counsellors are geese; and the lawyers of the courts in ordinary aremagpies. Foxes are generally selected as ambassadors, consuls, commercial-agents, and secretaries-of-legation. The ravens are chosenfor dealing-masters and executors on the effects of those deceased. Thebuck-goats are philosophers, and especially grammarians, partly for thesake of their horns, which they use on the slightest occasion, to goretheir opponents, and partly in consideration of their reverend beards, which so notably distinguish them from all other creatures. The staidyet energetic horse has the suffrage for the mayoralty and other civildignitaries. Estate owners and peasants are serpents, moles, rats andmice. The ass, on account of his braying voice, is always the leader ofthe church-choir. Treasurers, cashiers and inspectors are commonlywolves; their clerks, being hawks. The (roosters) cocks are appointedfor watchmen, and the dogs house-porters. 

The first who came on board of us, was a lean wolf or inspector, thesame as a custom-house-officer in Europe, followed by four hawks, hisclerks. These took from our wares what pleased them best, proving to usthereby that they understood their business perfectly, and had all itsappropriate tricks at their fingers' ends. The captain took me ashorewith him. As soon as we had set foot on the quay, a cock came towardsus, demanded whence we were, the nature of our cargo, and announced usto the inspector-general. This latter received us with much courtesy, and invited us to dine with him. The mistress of the house, whom I hadheard to be one of the greatest beauties among the female wolves, wasnot present at the table: the reason of this was, as we afterwardslearned, her husband's jealousy, who did not deem it advisable to allowsuch a handsome wife to be seen by strangers. There were, however, several ladies at table; among others, a certain commodore's wife, awhite cow with black spots: next to her sat a black cat, wife to themaster of hunt at court, newly arrived from the country. At my side wasplaced a speckled sow, the lady of a renovation-inspector: that speciesof officer-ship being generally taken from the hog-race. It must beobserved that the inhabitants of the Mezendoric empire, although theyare animals in figure, have hands and fingers on the fore feet. 

After dinner the speckled sow entered into conversation with ourinterpreter, during which she told him that she was overhead and ears inlove with me. He comforted her in the best manner he could, and promisedher his support and aid; then he turned himself towards me andendeavored to persuade me to be easy; but when he observed that hisflattering and arguments were vain, he advised me to take to flight, ashe knew that this lady would move heaven and earth to satisfy herdesires. From this time I remained constantly on board; but the shipitself was not a fortification sufficiently secure from the attacks ofthis lady, who by messengers and love-letters strove to melt the icethat surrounded my heart. Had I not, in the shipwreck I afterwardssuffered, lost my papers, I should now give some specimens of theswine's poetry. I have forgotten it all, except the following lines, inwhich she praises her being thus:

 O thou! for whom my too fond soul most ardently doth thirst, For whom my earliest passion, in retirement I have nursed: Think not my figure homely, though it be endued in bristles, -- What beauty hath the leafless tree, through which the cold wind whistles? How unadorned the noble horse, when of his beauteous mane he's shorn! O! who would love a purring cat, all in her furlessness forlorn. Ah, look around my darling pig! look on all living things, From the huge unwieldy mammoth to the smallest bird that sings;-- Were these not shagged or feathered all, how loudly should we jeer;-- Who would warmly strive to please e'en man, were man without a beard?

After our truck was finished and a rich freight stowed away, we sailedfor home. We had scarcely got into the open sea when it suddenly becamecalm, but soon after the wind breezed up. Having sailed awhile with agood wind, we saw again some mermaids, who

 --dripping wet Shot forth, and dived between the foaming waves, and now and then emitted horrible shrieks. The sailors were muchterrified at this, for they knew by experience, that these mournfulsounds were presages of storm and wreck. They had scarcely taken in thesails, before the whole heavens became veiled in black clouds:

 Day sinks in night: all nature shudders. Then, in an instant, loose from every point The storm, in frightful gusts and devilish uproar Breaks; the axis of the globe grates fearful, -- And thunders, clap on clap, resound the concave: The waves, din-maddened, tower to mountains. Wildly, gone her helm, the half-crushed craft Tumbles ungovernable. Now despairing shrieks Mingling with ocean's roar and crash of heaven, Rise from the peopled deck: 'tis finished!

Every movable thing on deck floated off, for besides the ever-rollingbillows, an immense rain fell in terrific water-spouts, accompanied bythunder and lightning. It seemed as though all the elements hadconspired for our destruction. During the rolling of the ship, our mastswere carried away, and then all hope of salvation was gone. Now and thena huge billow rolled over us, and carried with it one or two men farbeyond the ship. The storm raged more and more; no one cared longer forthe vessel: without helm, without masts, without captain and mates, whohad been washed overboard, the wreck lay at the pleasure of the waves. Having floated thus for three days, a bauble for the storm, we finallydescried a mountainous land in the distance. While rejoicing in the hopeof soon reaching this haven, our vessel struck so hard against a blindrock, that she was instantly dashed in pieces. In the confusion andterror of the moment I got hold of a plank, and, careless for the rest, thought only upon saving myself, so that even now I know nothing of thefate of my companions. I was quickly driven forth by the billows; andthis was fortunate for me, for otherwise I should have been crushedamong the timbers of the ship or torn in pieces by the jagged rocks uponwhich we had been cast, or escaping this should eventually have perishedfrom hunger and fatigue. I was wafted by the waves within a cape, wherethe sea was calmer, and where the roaring of the excited ocean soundedless frightfully. When I saw that I was near the shore, I began toscream vigorously, hoping to call the inhabitants to my assistance. Isoon heard a sound on the seashore, and saw some of the natives comefrom a wood near by; they got into a yawl and sailed towards me; thisboat being curiously fashioned of ozier and oak-branches twistedtogether, I concluded that this people must be very wild anduncultivated. I was heartily glad, when I found them to be men, for theywere the first human beings I had met during the whole voyage. They arevery like the inhabitants of our globe, who live in hot climates; theirbeards are black and their hair curled; the few among them who havelong and light hair, are considered monsters. The land which theyinhabit is very rocky: from the curved ridges of the rocks and theconnecting tops of the mountains, which cut the air in multipliedsinuosities, every sound reverberates in echo upon echo from the dalesbelow. The people in the yawl approached the plank upon which I floated, drew me from it, carried me to the shore, and gave me to eat and drink. Although the food did not taste very good, yet as I had fasted for threedays, it refreshed me very much, and in a short time I regained myformer strength. 

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CHAPTER XII. 

THE AUTHOR'S ARRIVAL IN QUAMA. 

Meanwhile a large multitude of people collected around me from allparts. They requested me to speak; but as I did not understand theirlanguage I could not answer them. They repeated often the word Dank, Dank, and supposing them to be Germans, I addressed them in thislanguage, then in Danish, and finally in Latin; but they signified tome, by shaking their heads, that these languages were unknown to them. Itried at last to declare myself in the subterranean tongues, namely, inNazaric and Martinianic; but it was in vain. 

After having addressed each other, thus incomprehensibly for a longtime, I was carried to a small hut, formed of wickers intricatelytwisted. In this hut were neither chairs nor tables; these people seatthemselves on the ground to eat; instead of beds they spread straw onthe earthy floor, upon which they throw themselves indiscriminately atnight. Their food is milk, cheese, barley-bread and meat, which theyrudely broil on the coals; for they do not understand cooking. Thus Ilived with them, like a dog, until I learned so much of their language, that I could speak with them and assist them a little in theirignorance. The simplest rules of living that I prepared for them wereconsidered as divine commands. My fame soon spread abroad, and all thevillages around sent forth crowds to a teacher, who, they believed, hadbeen sent to them from heaven. I heard even, that some had commenced anew chronology from the date of my arrival. All this pleased me only somuch the more, as formerly in Nazar I had been abused for my imprudenceand wavering judgment, and in Martinia despised and commiserated for myignorance. True, indeed, is the old proverb; that among the blind theone-eyed rules. I had now come to a land, where with littleunderstanding, I could raise myself to the highest dignities. There werehere the best opportunities to employ my talents, since this fruitfulland produced in abundance whatever subserved for pleasure and luxury aswell as usefulness and comfort. The inhabitants were not indocile norwere they wanting in conception; but since they had been blessed with nolight without themselves, they groped in the thickest darkness. When Itold them of my birth, my native land, of the shipwreck I had suffered, and of other occurrences in my voyages, not one would credit me. Theythought rather that I was an inhabitant of the sun, and had come down toenlighten them, wherefore they called me Pikil-Su, that is the sun'sambassador. For their religion, they believed in and acknowledged a God, but cared not at all to prove his existence. They thought it enough forthem that their forefathers had believed the same; and this blindsubmission to time-honored formulę was their simple and sole theology. Of the moral law, they were ignorant of all commandments save this: Donot unto others that which you would not have others do unto you. Theyhad no laws; the will of the emperor was their only rule. Of chronologythey had but a slight conception; their years were determined by theeclipses of the sun by Nazar's intervention. Were one asked his age, hewould answer: that he had attained so many eclipses. Their knowledge ofnatural science too, was very unsatisfactory and unreasonable; theybelieved the sun to be a plate of gold, and the planet Nazar, a cheese. Their property consisted in hogs, which, after marking, they drove intothe woods: the wealth of each was determined by the number of his swine. 

I applied myself, with all the fervor imaginable, to refine andenlighten this rude, yet promising people, so that shortly I came to beregarded among them as a saint; their trust in my wisdom was so great, that they thought nothing impossible with me. Therefore, when overtakenby misfortune, they would hasten to my hut and pray for my assistance. Once I found a peasant on his knees before my door, weeping, andbitterly complaining over the unfruitfulness of his trees, andbeseeching me to use my authority, that his trees should bear fruit tohim abundantly, as of old. 

I had heard that this whole country was governed by a Regent, whoseresidence, or palace, at that time, was about eight days' travel fromthe town where I lived. I say at that time, because the court dwelt, notin substantial, fixed houses, but in tents; and the residence was movedat pleasure from one province to another. The ruler at that period wasan old man, named Casba, which signifies, the great emperor. Inconsideration of its many large provinces, this country was indeed agreat empire; but, from the ignorance of the inhabitants, who madelittle use of their many natural advantages, and also from the absenceof that unanimity among the provinces, which would have dignified andstrengthened their counsels, and subserved for their mutual protection, they were exposed to the attacks and mockeries of their more vigorousneighbors, and not unfrequently obliged to pay tribute to nations muchinferior to themselves. 

The report of my name and power was spread in a short time even to theremotest provinces. Nothing could be done without consulting me, as anoracle, and when any undertaking miscarried, its failure was ascribed tomy indifference or indignation; wherefore, oblations were frequentlymade to assuage my anger. Finally the rumor was carried to the ears ofthe old emperor, that a great man had come into his dominions, in astrange dress, who gave himself out as ambassador of the sun, and hadproved himself more than man, by bestowing to the Quamites (thus theinhabitants were called, after the name of the land, Quama, ) wise andalmost divine rules of life. He therefore sent ambassadors, with ordersto invite me to the imperial residence. These were thirty in number, allclothed in tiger-skins, this dress being considered in Quama thegreatest of ornaments, since none were permitted to wear it, but thosewho had distinguished themselves in war against the Tanaquites, a nationof sensible tigers, and the mortal enemies of the Quamites. 

I had built, in the town where I dwelt, a walled house, after theEuropean style. At the sight of it, the imperial ambassadors wereastonished, and exclaimed that it was a work beyond human powers; theyentered it, as a sanctuary, with devout reverence, and there proclaimedto me the emperor's invitation in the following speech: "Since the greatemperor, our most gracious lord, reckons his genealogy through manifoldgenerations, from Spunko, the sun's son, the primary regent of Quama, nothing could surprise him more agreeably than this embassy; whereforehis majesty joyfully greets the ambassador of the sun, and humblyinvites him to the capital city of the empire. " I answered by expressingmy most humble thanks for the emperor's condescension, and immediatelyrepaired, with the ambassadors, to the capital. These lords had beenfourteen days on their journey to me, but assisted by my genius, thereturn occupied only four days. 

I had observed, during my residence in this country, that there werevast numbers of horses running wild in the woods, and hence ratherburthensome than useful to the inhabitants. I showed to the people howbeneficial these animals might be made to them, and taught them how totame these noble creatures. At my suggestion and by my direction, anumber of them were caught and broken in, and thus I was enabled tomount the ambassadors, and materially shorten the period of our journey. 

No idea can be formed of the wonder and astonishment with which theQuamites witnessed our entry into the city; some were so frightened thatthey ran far into the country. The emperor himself dared not, in hisfear, come out from his tent, nor would he stir, until one of theambassadors, dismounting his horse, went in and explained the wholesecret to him. Shortly I was, with a great retinue, led into theimperial tent. The old emperor was seated on a carpet surrounded by hiscourtiers. On my entrance, I acknowledged, in the most polite terms, theexceeding grace his imperial majesty had shown me; thereupon the emperorarose and asked me what the king of the sun, and father of his familyproposed to do. Conceiving it politic, and even necessary not toundeceive the Quamites in the opinion they themselves first entertained, I answered: that his majesty, the king of the sun, had sent me down tothis land to refine, by good laws and salutary rules of life, theuncultivated manners of the Quamites, and teach them the arts, throughwhich they might not only resist and repel their valiant and energeticneighbors, but even extend the boundaries of their own empire; andadded, that I had been ordered to remain with them forever. The emperorlistened to this speech with much apparent pleasure, ordered a tent tobe immediately raised for me near his own, gave me fifteen servants, andtreated me less as a subject than as an intimate friend. 

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CHAPTER XIII. 

THE BEGINNING OF THE FIFTH MONARCHY. 

From this time all my exertions were directed to the accomplishment of aradical reform throughout the country. I commenced by improving theirmode of warfare, in exercising the young men in riding, fencing andshooting. My constant labor was rewarded so well that, in a short time, I exhibited before the emperor six thousand horsemen. 

At this period the Tanaquites were preparing for a new attack upon theQuamites, on account of the refusal of this latter people to pay ayearly tribute which had been several times demanded and as oftendenied. I went, at the emperor's desire, with my cavalry and somefootmen to meet the invaders. To the infantry I gave javelins andarrows, that they might fight their enemies at a distance; for theQuamites had formerly used only short swords or poignards, andconsequently were obliged to meet in close combat their frightful foes, the Tanaquites, who excelling them greatly in personal strength, hadgreat advantage over them. Hearing that the enemy were approaching theboundary, as commander-in-chief, I repaired instantly towards them. Onmeeting the invaders I caused the footmen to attack them with theirjavelins; this put them into panic and flight, and determined the fateof the day. The enemy suffered a terrible defeat and the Tanaquiticleader, with twenty other noble tigers, were taken prisoners alive andcarried in triumph to Quama. It is not possible to describe the generaland tumultuous joy that filled the whole country for this gloriousvictory; because in former wars the Quamites had generally been obligedto lay down their arms. The emperor commanded the prisoners to beimmediately executed, according to old custom; but considering this ahorrible custom, I persuaded him to respite them, and put them in prisonfor further deliberation. 

I had observed that this land was very rich in saltpetre, and hadcollected a considerable quantity for the purpose of making powder. Thisintention I had kept secret, however, from all except the emperor, whosepermission I needed to establish manufactories for rifles and otherguns. With the aid of these I hoped in a short time to subdue all theenemies of the empire. When I had finished some hundred rifles andprepared balls suitable for them, I made a trial of my project to theastonishment of all. A certain number of soldiers were selected to learnthis military art, and were exercised in the management of the guns. When this body of soldiers had become accustomed to the use of these newengines of war, and could employ them effectively, a review was held, after which the emperor proclaimed me Jakal, that is, generalissimo overthe whole army. While all these matters were pending, I had entered intoan intimate friendship with the brave leader of the Tanaquites, theimprisoned Tomopoloko, with whom I held frequent and interestingconversations, with the object of learning the constitution, character, and customs of his nation. I could not but observe, to my greatastonishment, that they were a witty, moral and enlightened people, andthat the sciences were earnestly and effectively cultivated by them. Thechief told me, that towards the east were a valorous people, againstwhose attacks, the Tanaquites were obliged to keep themselves alwaysprepared. The inhabitants of that country, he added, were small, and inreality much inferior in bodily strength to those of Tanaquis; but beingof superior acuteness and agility, and excellent bowmen, they had infact, often forced the Tanaquites to sue for peace. 

I soon came to know, that this formidable nation consisted of cats; andthat they had distinguished themselves among all the nations under thefirmament, for their rational judgment and political acumen. It provokedand pained me not a little, that skilfulness, the sciences, and politemanners, should be universally among the animals of the subterraneanworld, while only real human beings, namely, the Quamites were sunk tothe profoundest depths of uncultivated barbarism. I consoled myself, however, in the hope that, through my endeavors, this shame would sooncease, and the Quamites would recover that dominion, which belonged tothem as men over all other animals. 

Since their last defeat, the Tanaquites kept very quiet for a long time;but when they found out the nature and condition of our cavalry; whenthey discovered that those centaurs, who had frightened them so terriblyat first, were nothing in reality, but tamed horses with men seated uponthem, they took courage and armed new troops against the Quamites, underthe command of their king. Their whole army consisted of twenty thousandtigers, all veteran soldiers, heroes of many hard fought fields, excepttwo regiments of new recruits; these hastily collected warriors were, however, more formidable in name and numbers than in service. Alreadysure of victory, they fell at once upon Quama. I immediately orderedagainst them twelve thousand infantry, among whom were six hundredmusketeers, and four thousand horsemen. As I had not the slightest doubtof a fortunate termination to this expedition, I requested the emperorto take command of it, and thus reap the honor of the victory. By thisappearance of modesty, I lost no respect, for the whole army stillconsidered me the true leader. I first directed my cavalry against theenemy, but these were resisted with so much vigor, that the side ofvictory was for a long time doubtful: at the critical moment, whentriumph was vacillating between the two powers, I detached my musketeersfrom the main body and advanced upon the foe. The Tanaquites were muchastonished at the first shots, for they could not conceive whence camethe thunder and lightning; but when they saw the mournful effects of ourcontinued volleys, they became terrified; at the first discharge fellabout two hundred tigers, among which were two chaplains, who were shotdown while encouraging the soldiers to bravery. When I observed thepanic among the enemy, I commanded a second discharge, whose resultswere more fatal than the former; their king himself was shot: then theTanaquites took to flight; our cavalry followed them, and cut down somany of the flying multitude, that those in the rear could not proceedfrom the huge piles of slain that covered the way. When the battle wasover, we counted the killed of the enemy and found them to be thirteenthousand: our own loss was comparatively very slight. The victoriousarmy marched into the kingdom of Tanaqui and encamped before itscapital. The general terror had meanwhile increased so much, that themagistrates submissively met the conquerors and delivered the keys ofthe city. The capital surrendering, the whole country soon followed itsexample. The disregard and contempt in which the Quamites had to thistime been held, were changed to admiration and fear: the empire, withthe addition of the newly conquered kingdom, was extended to twice itsformer size. 

The glory of these actions was with one voice ascribed to my superiorknowledge and untiring industry; and the esteem which had been longcherished for me, now passed over to a reverent and divine worship. Thisperiod of general peace and exultation, I thought a fitting time toadvance the civilization and refinement of the Quamites, and as apractical commencement to this great work I ordered the royal Tanaquiticlibrary to be moved to Quama. 

My curiosity to become acquainted with this library had been at firstexcited by the imprisoned leader Tomopoloko, who told me that among itsmanuscripts was one, whose author had been up to our globe, in whichhistory of his travels he had described several of its kingdoms, particularly those of Europe. The Tanaquites had seized this manuscriptduring one of their predatory excursions into a distant land; but as theauthor had concealed his name, they knew not what countryman he was, norin what manner he had passed up through the earth. The quaint title ofthis book was: "Tanian's[2] Travels Above-ground; being a description ofthe kingdoms and countries there, especially those of Europe. " From theantiquity of this work together with its great popularity, it had becomeso ragged, that what I was most anxious to learn, namely, the narrationof the author's journey to our earth and his return, was mostunfortunately lost. Here is the contents of this singular manuscript, such as I found it:

 "_Fragments of Tanian's Diary, kept on a Voyage above-ground, Translated by his Excellency, M. Tomopoloko, General-in-chief, in the Service of his Tanaquitic majesty. _"

 * * * * *

"This land (Germany) was called the Roman empire; but it has been anempty title, since the Roman monarchy was demolished several centuriessince. The language of this land is not easy to understand, on accountof its perverted style; for, what in other languages is placed before, in this comes after, so that the meaning cannot be had before a wholepage is read through. The form of government is very inconsistent; somethink they have a regent and yet have none; it should be an empire, yetit is divided into several duchies, each of which has its owngovernment, and often engages in a formal war with its neighbor. Thewhole land is called 'holy, ' although there is not to be found in it theleast trace of piety. The regent, or more correctly the unregent, whobears the name of emperor, is denominated 'the continual augmenter ofhis country, ' although he not seldom diminishes it; 'invincible, 'notwithstanding he is often slain: sometimes by the French, sometimes bythe Turks. One has no less reason to wonder at the people's rights andliberties; but although they have many rights, they are forbidden to usethem. Innumerable commentaries have been written upon the Germanconstitution, but notwithstanding this, they have made no advancebecause

 * * * * *

"The capital of this country (France) is called Paris, and is verylarge, and may in a certain degree be considered the capital of allEurope; for it exercises a peculiar law-giving power over the wholecontinent. It has, for example, the exclusive right to prescribe theuniversal mode of dress and living; and no style of dress, howeverinconvenient or ridiculous, may be controverted after the Parisians haveonce established it. How or when they obtained this prescriptive rightis unknown to me. I observed, however, that this dominion did not extendto other things; for the other nations often make war with the French, and not seldom force them to sue for peace on very hard terms; butsubservience in dress and living nevertheless continues. In quickness ofjudgment, inquisitiveness after news, and fruitfulness of discovery, theFrench are much like the Martinians. 

 * * * * *

"From Bologna we went to Rome. This latter city is governed by a priest, who is held to be the mightiest of the kings and rulers of Europe, although his possessions may be travelled through in one day. Beyond allother regents, who only have supremacy over their subjects' lives andgoods, he can govern souls. The Europeans generally believe that thispriest has in his possession the keys of heaven. I was very curious tosee these keys, but all my endeavors were in vain. His power, not onlyover his own subjects, but the whole human race, consists principally inthat he can absolve those whom God condemns, and condemn those whom Godabsolves; an immense authority, which the inhabitants of oursubterranean world seriously believe is not becoming to any mortal man. But it is an easy matter to induce the Europeans to credit the mostunreasonable assertions, and submit to the most high-handed assumptions, notwithstanding they consider themselves alone sensible and enlightened, and, puffed up with their foolish conceits, look contemptuously upon allother nations, whom they call barbarous. 

"I will not, by any means, defend our subterranean manners andinstitutions: my purpose simply is, to examine those of the Europeans, and show how little claim these people have to find fault with othernations. 

"It is customary, in some parts of Europe, to powder the hair andclothes with ground and sifted corn; the same which nature has producedfor the nourishment of man. This flour is called hair-powder. It iscombed out with great care at night, preparatory to a fresh sprinklingin the morning. There is another custom with them, which did not appearless ridiculous to me. They have certain coverings for the head, calledhats, made ostensibly, to protect the head from the weather, but which, instead of being used for this very reasonable purpose, are generallyworn under the arm, even in the winter. This seemed as foolish to me aswould the instance of one's walking through the city with his cloak orbreeches in his hand; thus exposing his body, which these should cover, to the severity of the weather. 

"The doctrines of European religion are excellent and consistent withsound reason. In their books of moral law they are commanded to read theChristian precepts often; to search into their true meaning, and areadvised to be indulgent with the weak and erring. Nevertheless, shouldany understand one or another doctrine of these books in any but theestablished sense, they would be imprisoned, lashed, yes, and evenburned for their want of judgment. This seemed to me the same case, asif one should be punished for a blemish in sight, through which he sawthat object square which others believed to be round. I was told thatsome thousand people had been executed by hanging or burning, for theiroriginality of thought. 

"In most cities and villages are to be found certain persons standing inhigh places, who animadvert severely upon the sins of others, whichthey themselves commit daily: this seemed to me as sensible as thepreaching of temperance by a drunkard. 

"In the larger towns, it is almost generally the fashion to invite one'sguests, immediately after meals, to imbibe a kind of sup made from burntbeans, which they call coffee. To the places where this is drunk, theyare drawn in a great box on four wheels, by two very strong animals; forthe higher classes of Europeans hold it to be very indecent to moveabout on their feet. 

"On the first day of the year, the Europeans are attacked by a certaindisease, which we subterraneans know nothing of. The symptoms of thismalady are a peculiar disturbance of the mind and agitation of the head;its effects are that none can remain, on that day, five minutes in oneplace. They run furiously from one house to another, with no appreciablereason. This disease continues with many even fourteen days; until atlast, they become weary of their eternal gadding, check themselves andregain their former health. 

"In France, Italy and Spain, the people lose their reason for someweeks, in the winter season. This delirium is moderated by strewingashes on the foreheads of the sufferers. In the northern parts ofEurope, to which this disease sometimes extends, and where the asheshave no power, nature is left to work the cure. 

"It is the custom with most Europeans, to enter into a solemn compactwith God, in the presence of witnesses, three or four times a year, which they invariably and immediately break. This compact is called'communion, ' and seems to have been established only to show that theEuropeans are used to break their promises several times each year. Theyconfess their sins and implore the mercy of God, in certain melodies, accompanied by instrumental music. As the magnitude of their sinsincreases, their music becomes louder: thus fluters, trumpeters anddrummers are favorite helpers to devotion. 

"Almost all the nations of Europe are obliged to acknowledge and believein the doctrines, which are contained in a certain 'holy book. ' At thesouth the reading of this book is entirely forbidden; so that the peopleare forced to credit what they dare not read; in these same regions, itis likewise austerely forbidden to worship God, except in a languageincomprehensible to the people; so that, only those prayers are held tobe lawful and pleasing to God, which are uttered from memory, withoutcomprehension. 

"The learned controversies which occupy the European academies, consistin the discussion of matters, the development of which is productive ofno benefit, and in the examination of phenomena, the nature of which isbeyond the reach of the human mind. The most serious study of a Europeanscholar, is the consideration of a pair of old boots, the slippers, necklaces and gowns of a race long extinct. Of the sciences, bothworldly and divine, none judge for themselves, but subscribe blindly tothe opinions of a few. The decisions of these, when once established, they cling to, like oysters to the rocks. They select a few from theirnumber whom they call, 'wise, ' and credit them implicitly. Now, therewould be nothing to object against this, could raw and ignorant peopledecide in this case; but to decide concerning wisdom requires, methinks, a certain degree of sapience in the judge. 

"In the southern countries, certain cakes are carried about, which thepriests set up for Gods; the most curious part of this matter is, thebakers themselves, while the dough yet cleaves to their fingers, willswear that these cakes have created heaven and earth. 

"The English prefer their liberty to all else, and are not slaves, except to their wives. Today they reject that religion, which yesterdaythey professed. I ascribe this fickleness to the situation of theircountry; they are islanders and seamen, and probably become affected bythe variable element that surrounds them. They inquire very often aftereach other's health, so that one would suppose them to be all doctors;but the question: how do you do? is merely a form of speech; a soundwithout the slightest signification. 

"Towards the north, is a republic, consisting of seven provinces. Theseare called 'united, ' notwithstanding there is not to be found the leasttrace of union among them. The mob boast of their power, and insist upontheir _right_ to dispose of state affairs; but no where is thecommonalty more excluded from such matters; the whole government beingin the hands of some few families. 

"The inhabitants of this _republic_ heap up great riches with anxiousand unwearied vigilance, which, however, they do not enjoy: their pursesare always full, their stomachs always empty. One would almost believethey lived on smoke, which they continually suck through tubes or pipes, made of clay. It must, nevertheless, be confessed, that these peoplesurpass all others in cleanliness; for they wash everything but theirhands. 

"Every land has its own laws and customs, which are usually opposed toeach other. For example; by law, the wife is subject to the husband; bycustom, the husband is ruled by the wife. 

"In Europe, the superfluous members of society only are respected; thesedevour not only the fruits of the land but the land itself. Thecultivators of the soil, who feed these gorges are degraded for theirindustry and despised for their usefulness. 

"The prevalence of vice and crime in Europe may perhaps be fairlyinferred from the great number of gallows and scaffolds to be seeneverywhere. Each town has its own executioner. I must, for justice sake, clear England from this stigma; I believe there are no public murderersin that country: the inhabitants hang themselves. 

"I have a kind of suspicion that the Europeans are cannibals; for theyshut large flocks of healthful and strong persons in certain inclosures, called cloisters, for the purpose of making them fat and smooth. Thisobject seldom fails, as these prisoners, free from all labor and care, have nothing to do but to enjoy themselves in these gardens of pleasure. 

"Europeans commonly drink water in the morning to cool their stomachs;this object accomplished, they drink brandy to heat them again. 

"In Europe are two principal sects in religion; the Roman catholic andthe protestant. The protestants worship but one God; the catholics, several. Each city and village, with these, has its appropriate God orGoddess. All these deities are created by the pope, or superior priestat Rome, who, on his part, is chosen by certain other priests, calledcardinals. The mighty power of these creators of the creator of thegods, does not, as it would seem to an indifferent spectator, apparentlyalarm the people. 

"The ancient inhabitants of Italy subdued the whole world, and obeyedtheir wives; the present, on the contrary, abuse their wives and submitto the whole world. 

"The Europeans generally feed upon the same victuals with thesubterraneans. The Spaniards alone live on the air. 

"Commerce flourishes here and there; many things are offered for sale inEurope, which with us are never objects of trade. Thus in Rome, peoplesell heaven; in Switzerland, themselves; and in * * * * * * *, thecrown, sceptre and throne are offered at public auction. 

"In Spain, idleness is the true mark of a well-bred man; and thedistinguishing proof of pure nobility is an aptitude to sleep. 

"Among European writers, those are in the highest repute, who change thenatural order of words, making that which is in itself simple anddistinct, intricate and incomprehensible. The class most noted for thisabominable perversion of style is that of the 'poets:' this singularremoval of words is called 'poetry. ' The capability to puzzle is by nomeans the only requisite to become a true poet; one must be able to liemost terribly. A certain old poet named Homerus, who possessed boththese qualities in an eminent degree, is styled the 'master, ' and isidolized with a kind of divine worship. He has had many imitators of hisdistortion of sentences and falsification of truth; but, it is said, none have yet reached his excellence. 

"The cultivators of science purchase books in great quantities, not somuch, I am told, for the sake of the contents, as for their antiquenessof style or elegance of binding. 

"The learned and unlearned are distinguished from each other bydifferent dresses and manners; but especially by different religions:the latter believe mostly in one God; the former worship manydivinities, both male and female. Among the principal of these are, Apollo, Minerva, and nine muses; besides many lesser whole and halfGods. The poets particularly implore their aid and 'hail' them when theytake a notion to rage. 

"The learned are divided, according to their different studies into theclasses of philosophers, poets, grammarians, natural philosophers, metaphysicians, &c. 

"A philosopher is a scientific tradesman, who, for a certain price, sells prescriptions of self-denial, temperance and poverty; he generallypreaches the pains of wealth, till he becomes rich himself, when heabandons the world for a comfortable and dignified retreat. The fatherof the philosophers, Seneca, is said to have collected royal wealth. 

"A poet is one who makes a great stir with printed prattle, falsehoodand fury. Madness is the characteristic of the true poet. All those whoexpress themselves, with clearness, precision and simplicity are deemedunworthy of the laurel wreath. 

"The grammarians are a sort of military body, who disturb the publicpeace. They are distinguished from all other warriors, by dress andweapons. They wear black instead of colored uniforms, and wield pensrather than swords. They fight with as much obstinacy for letters andwords as do the others for liberty and father-land. 

"A natural philosopher is one who searches into the bowels of the earth, studies the nature of animals, worms and insects, and, in a word, isfamiliar with every thing, but himself. 

"A metaphysician is a sort of philosopher, partly visionary and partlysceptical, who sees what is concealed from all others. He describes thebeing and unfolds the nature of souls and spirits, and knows both whatis, and what is not. From the acuteness of his sight, the metaphysiciancannot discern what lies directly before his feet. 

"I have thus briefly considered the condition of the learned republic inEurope. I could relate many other things, but I think I have given thereader a sufficient test, by which he may judge how far the Europeanshave a right to hold themselves preėminent for wisdom. 

"The people above-ground are exceedingly pious, and extraordinarilyzealous in praying. Their prayers, however, do not arise from theimpulses and emotions of their hearts; but are subdued to mere mattersof form, directed by bells, clocks or sun-dials. Their devotion isentirely mechanical, founded on external signs and old customs ratherthan in sincere feeling. 

"When I came to Italy, I fancied myself master over the whole country;for every one called himself my slave. I took a notion to test theextent of this humble obedience, and commanded my landlord to lend mehis wife for a night; he became very angry, however, at this, andordered me out of his house. 

"In the north, there are many people who seek with great pains to obtaintitles of offices which they do not hold; and many lose their reason intheir eagerness to be on the right side. Furthermore, "

 * * * * *

Here I lost my patience. Inflamed to the utmost fury, I threw the bookon the ground, and assured Tomopoloko, who was by me, that it was thefiction of an unjust and choleric writer. When my first passion wascooled, I reviewed my sentence, and finally concluded that the authorof these travels, although unfair and untrue in many particulars, hadnevertheless made some good points and happy reflections. 

I will now return to civil affairs. All our neighbors had kept veryquiet for a long period, and during this peace I made every effort toconstitute the government according to my own notions, and strengthenthe army in numbers and efficiency. 

Suddenly, we received information that three warlike and formidablenations, namely, the Arctonians, Kispusiananians and Alectorians, hadunited against the Quamites. The first named were bears gifted withreason and speech. The Kispusiananians were a nation of large catscelebrated for their cunning and ferocity. The Alectorians were cocks, armed with bows and arrows. These arrows with poisoned tips, were castwith wonderful precision, and their least touch was fatal. 

These three nations had been irritated by the uncommon progress of theQuamites as well as by the fall of the Tanaquites. The allied powerssent ambassadors to Quama, to demand the liberty of the imprisonedTanaquitians and the cession of their land, with power to declare warshould the same be denied. By my advice, they were immediately dismissedwith the following answer: "Since the Tanaquitians, violators of peaceand alliance, have deserved the misery which they have brought uponthemselves by their own folly and pride, his majesty, the emperor, isdetermined to defend, to the utmost, the possessions of a land, conquered in a lawful war, in spite of the threats and fearless of thestrength of your unnatural alliance. "

In a short time I had an army of forty thousand men ready for the comingwar: among these were eight thousand horsemen and two thousand riflemen. The emperor, old as he was, determined to follow this campaign; hiseagerness and ambition were so great, that neither his wife'srepresentations nor mine were effective enough to induce him to abandonthis intention. 

In this state of affairs, I was made somewhat uneasy from mistrust ofthe Tanaquitians. I feared that, impatient of their unaccustomedslavery, they would take the first opportunity to throw off their yoke, and go over to the enemy. I did not deceive myself; for immediatelyafter the declaration of war, we heard that full twelve thousandTanaquitians in complete armor, had marched for the enemy's encampment. Thus were we occupied at once with four mighty foes. 

In the beginning of the month Kilian, we commenced our march. From aspy, we learnt that the united troops had already besieged the fortSibol in Tanaqui, on the borders of Kispusianania. On our arrival beforethe place, they abandoned the siege and prepared to meet us. The battletook place in a dale near the fort, and is to this day called the"Sibolic battle. "

The Arctonians, who formed their left wing, made great havoc among ourcavalry; and, supported by the rebellious Tanaquites, fell furiously onour right; a moment longer and the fate of the conflict would have beendetermined. I detached a body of riflemen to engage the attention of theenemy, and allow the cavalry to recover; this movement was veryeffective; the men handled their guns well, and the enemy hastilyabandoned their ground, under a terrific shower of balls. Meanwhile, the Kispusiananians on the other side pressed our infantry very hard;six hundred Quamites were down: some killed, others mortally wounded. The recovered cavalry now rushed upon them impetuously, broke theirranks, and, unresisted, slaughtered them by thousands. 

The Alectorians, who formed the reserve, gave us the greatest trouble, for when our soldiers would attack them, they flew into the air, whencethey shot on our heads their poisoned arrows. One of these entered theneck of the old emperor, while fighting vigorously in the midst of thefield. He fell directly from his horse, was carried to his tent, andshortly after expired. The soldiers having been kept in ignorance oftheir sovereign's death, the battle was continued until midnight. I soonfound that our balls had but little effect upon our flying enemies;their motions being so rapid that our gunners could take no aim. Somenew method must be devised to check them; a lucky expedient occurred tome; I ordered the guns to be loaded with small shot: these scattering, brought them down in great flocks, and soon half of them were destroyed;the rest laid down their weapons and surrendered. The Arctonians andKispusiananians quickly followed their example, and their fortificationswere surrendered to our hands. 

 When all these things were fortunately brought to an end, Behold then I called together the first among the people, the eldest, The heads of all the troops, to Council, in full assembly; Like the bubbling ocean's high-roaring billows They all did stream to me; and silently heard my speech:

"Noble, brave and celebrated warriors. I doubt not, that it is wellknown to the most of you, that I ofttimes advised his majesty not tohazard his precious life in this desperate strife. But his naturalcourage and fearless heroism would not suffer him to remain at home, while his brave people exposed themselves abroad. O, that he could havewitnessed our glorious victory! Then our entrance into the imperialresidence would have been a true triumph, and our joy over so many nobledeeds would have been perfect; not as now, mingled with tormentingsorrow! I can no longer conceal from you the mournful event, which hasgiven each one of us, a greater wound than could all the arrows of theenemy. Know then, that our emperor, in the thickest of the battle, wasstruck by an unfortunate arrow, and soon after expired. Horrible event!What sorrow, what general mourning will the loss of this great kingcause over the whole country! Yet, do not lose courage! The great herohas ceased to live in himself; but he is not dead to you! Your emperorlives again in two princes, true images of their great father, and heirsno less to his virtues than to his dignities. You have not changed youremperor, but only your emperor's name. Since the prince Timuso, as thefirst born, receives the crown, I am, from this moment, under hissceptre, the leader of the army. 

"Hail, Timuso! To him let us swear allegiance! To him, let us sweareternal loyalty! Him, let us all hereafter obey!"

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[Illustration]

CHAPTER XIV. 

THE AUTHOR BECOMES A MONARCH UNDER THE GROUND. 

When my speech was ended, they all cried out with loud voices: "We willhave Pikil-Su, for emperor. " When I heard this, I became terrified, andbegged them, with tears in my eyes, not to forget the fidelity and dutythey owed to the imperial family. But my words were of no use. They allapproached me, and placed the crown upon my head, repeating theabove-mentioned exclamation. I was then carried from the tent andproclaimed before the whole army, emperor of Quama, king of Tanaqui, Arctonia and Alectoria, and duke of Kispusianania. Afterwards we made atriumphal entry into the capital, where prince Timuso, himselfacknowledged me for emperor. Thus, from a miserable, shipwrecked wretch, I became a great and powerful monarch. I soon married the daughter ofthe deceased emperor, for the people still loved and honored the oldroyal family. This princess was named Ralac, and

 Bloomed, like the new-blown rose In mellowed, purple-smile. 

when I had reduced to order the affairs of the empire, and firmlyestablished myself on the throne, I thought of new means, by which Imight extend my dominions, and render my power fearful to the wholesubterranean world. I turned my attention to a navy, and soon had afleet of twenty ships on the sea. 

I soon came to regard myself an under-ground Alexander; and determinedto make myself as famous as he had on our globe. I concluded to sailfirst for Mezendore and thence to Martinia. We set sail at that periodof the year, when the planet Nazar is of the middle size, and in a fewdays came in sight of the Mezendoric coast. 

I immediately sent ambassadors to the imperial residence, of whom wasdemanded in the name of the emperor, "What their purpose; whence they came Over the foaming billows of the swelling main. "

The ambassadors answered:

 "Neither misleading stars, deluding winds nor storm Here brought us; with voluntary will we steered. "

and thereupon delivered to the emperor a letter of the followingcontents:

 "We, Niels Klim, ambassador of the sun, emperor in Quama, king of Tanaqui, Arctonia, and Alectoria, and duke of Kispusianania, salute the emperor of Mezendore, Miklopolata. We humbly make known, that it is concluded in the unchangeable councils of heaven, that all the empires and kingdoms of the world must surrender themselves to the power of Quama; and as the will of providence is irrevocable, your kingdom must necessarily submit to fate. We therefore advise you to surrender voluntarily yourself and your dominions, rather than foolishly resist our invincible phalanx, and thereby experience all the bloody horrors of war. 

 "Given from our fleet, the third day in the month Rimat. "

In a few days our ambassadors returned with a bold and haughty answer. Imade a descent upon the coast, placed my army in battle array, and sentspies to examine the condition of the enemy. The spies came back ingreat haste, and related that an immense army, of sixty thousand innumber, consisting of lions, tigers, elephants, bears and birds of prey, was drawing towards us. We were soon apprised of their near approach, byroars, shrieks and terrific cries, commingling a devilish tumult. Thecombat soon commenced, and truly, 'twas one of the hottest and mostcontumaceous, in which I ever engaged: at last we put them to flight. 

In this engagement fell thirty-three thousand Mezendarians, and aboutfour thousand were made prisoners. We followed our victory, and drewbefore the capital city; this we besieged both by land and sea. Soenergetic was our blockade, that the enemy quickly proposed a parley, and sent ambassadors to ask for peace on reasonable conditions. Theemperor offered to me his daughter, the handsomest of the lionesses, inmarriage, and the half of his empire as a dowry. These conditions, although very honorable, were very displeasing to me, for I consideredit both unsafe and illicit to forsake my wife, whom I left behind inpregnancy, and marry a lioness. I therefore sent back the ambassadorswithout answer. 

I now ordered my cannon to be directed against the wall, which, althoughbuilt of stone, was soon rent. The emperor lost all hope and surrenderedhimself together with all his lands. After putting a garrison in thecapital, I took the emperor on board my own ship, and laid my course forMartinia, the coast of which we reached after a long but fortunatevoyage. 

We obtained here the same success as elsewhere. When the Martinianssubmitted, I determined to include their neighbors under the same yoke. As I was preparing to effect this, ambassadors from four adjacentcountries arrived, and voluntarily acknowledged allegiance to me. I nowpossessed so many kingdoms, that I did not deem it worth my trouble toascertain the names of these; but included them all under the title ofthe Martinianic "dominion. "

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CHAPTER XV. 

A SUDDEN CHANGE IN THE FORTUNES OF THE AUTHOR. 

Having made so many and extraordinary warlike excursions, and added toour fleet a number of Martinianic ships, we set sail for our own land, into which we entered with a splendor exceeding the old Roman triumphs. And really my deeds deserved all possible honors; for what heroic actioncould be greater and more glorious than to change a despised nation, anation exposed to the insults of its weaker neighbors, to theacknowledged and respected ruler of the whole subterranean world? Whatcould be more honorable to a man, than to reinstate the human race inthat dominion, which nature has given to it, over all other animals?

From this time a new period may be reckoned in history; a fifth monarchycan be added to the glorious roll of splendid empires. To the Assyrian, Persian, Greek and Roman empires, the Subterranean-Quamatic monarchy, which unquestionably exceeds them all in magnificence and power, may notbe considered unworthy to be joined. I could not decline, for obviousreasons, the title of Koble, or great, with which the conquered nationssaluted me. 

I was hailed thereafter, by the following titles: "Niels the Great, Ambassador of the Sun, Emperor in Quama and Mezendore, King of Tanaqui, Alectoria, Arctonia, the Mezendoric and Martinianic dominions, GrandDuke of Kispusianania, Ruler of Martinia, etc. Etc. "

 ----firmly founded, stood The mighty empire; the favorite of fortune, I seemed as firmly fixed; not one, alas! May be deemed happy 'till his latest hour. 

When I had reached this splendid and powerful height, greater than anyman should desire, I became, what men usually become, who are raisedfrom a simple state to great honor in the world. I forgot my formercondition, and inclined to vanity. Instead of exerting myself to retainthe favor of the people, I proved myself cruel and rigorous to allclasses. My subjects, whom I had formerly endeared by friendly andpolite conduct, I now regarded and treated as slaves. For this course, Icame soon to be despised; the love and reverence of my people werechanged to indifference and fear. Their sentiments towards me I soon hadreason to understand, when I issued a proclamation to the inhabitants. 

The occasion was this: the empress, whom I left in pregnancy during mylast expedition, had in my absence been delivered of a son. This princeI wished to have nominated as my successor. I therefore summoned a Diet, and commanded the Quamitian nobles and the great men among the conquerednations, to meet in the capital, at the crowning of the child. Nonedared to disobey this proclamation, and the coronation passed off withgreat magnificence; but I observed by the countenances of my subjects, that their joy was dissembled. I became more confirmed in my mistrust, when I learnt that a multitude of libels had been spread about. Theselibels, by unknown authors, criticised me very severely, and assertedthat prince Timuso was insulted in the choice of my son. This enraged meso much that I could not rest until that noble and excellent princeshould be removed from my path. I therefore suborned some persons toaccuse him of treason; and since rulers seldom want assistants, whenthey would commit crimes, I was quickly enabled to prove that Timuso hadattempted my life. I had him sentenced to death by bribed judges, andthen threw him into prison, where he was privately murdered; for Ifeared to excite a rebellion by a public execution. I had determined tomurder the younger prince likewise; but postponed it. His youth procuredfor him the safety, which neither my justice nor humanity would havegranted him. Having once imbued my hands in innocent blood, my crueltyand moroseness knew no bounds. I doomed to death several whole families, whose loyalty I merely suspected. Not a day passed without bloodshed. Idefiled my soul with the blood of innocence, virtue and nobleness. Allthese things hastened a rebellion, excited by the nobles, who had beenlong disgusted with me. 

I will here acknowledge, that I deserved all the misfortunes thatafterwards met me. It had certainly been more fit for a Christian kingto have taught his ignorant and heathen subjects to know the true God, and to have given them an example in my own person of the sweetcharities of the true religion, than to have excelled, even themselvesin barbarity, sin and moral turpitude. It would have been an easy matterfor me to have reformed the whole subterranean world, for whatever Icommanded was fulfilled; whatever I determined was received in perfectgood faith; whenever I spoke, my words were as those of a God. But Iforgot God and myself; I thought of nothing but empty and vain splendor, and the augmentation of my power; wherefore I perpetrated manycruelties, until the people, unable to bear more, (and they were apatient people, ) broke out against me. 

While matters stood thus, I determined to lay hands on prince Hidoba. This intention I revealed to my high-chancellor, Kalak, in whom I hadgreat confidence. He promised to be of service to me in all things, anddeparted to fulfil my order: but at heart, he detested my cowardlyfears, and left me only to discover my plot to the prince. Together theyrepaired to the fort, collected the garrison, and represented, in atouching manner, their danger and my fears. The tears of the unfortunateprince gave weight to his words; all seized their arms, and promisedthat they would hazard their lives for him. The cunning chancellor tookthe opportunity to persuade them to swear loyalty to the prince, andsent messages to others, who, he knew, were displeased with me, to takearms against the tyrant. 

 All armed themselves, whose hearts, through fear and horror, Did burn towards their country's tyrant; they met

and united with the garrison, while I awaited the return of thechancellor. 

 * * * * *

By the advice of Pomopoloko, I fled seasonably to Tanaqui, leaving myown capital before the inhabitants generally were apprised of theimmediate cause of the sudden out-break. Arrived in Tanaqui, I quicklycollected an army of forty thousand men, and boldly retraced the stepswhich a few days before I had pursued in fear and trembling. I hadlittle doubt that my powers would be augmented by Quamites, who had beeneither too remote to suffer from my cruelty, or too indifferent to myinfamy, to hesitate in joining a force so overpowering, and a leaderwhose prospects were so brilliant as mine. But I was deceived in myhopes: instead of auxiliaries a herald from the prince met me. Theobject of his mission was to declare a formal war, and, for acommencement of hostilities, that my wife and son had been imprisoned. On the footsteps of the herald came the Quamitic forces. A bloodyengagement took place, in which our part proved to be inferior. I, leftto my fate, fled to a neighboring mountain, crossed its side anddescended to a dale behind it. There I remained in concealment for sometime, bemoaning, the while, my misery, as I then believed, but which Iafterwards more justly named, my folly. I was so agitated, had sothoroughly lost that presence of mind for which I had in former daysbeen distinguished, that I did not remove from my head the crown, which, being ornamented with sunbeams, would have easily betrayed me. Whilepanting like a bayed lion, I heard a nestling on the other side of themountain, which I supposed was made by men beating the bushes todiscover any hiders. I now looked around for a more secure retreat, forI doubted not that my flight had been noticed, and that these pursuerswould search on my side of the mountain. Behind me was

 ----A thick and matted forest, sunk between hills All desolate and bare, whose dark and awful silence Beckoned me. 

I hurried thither, fiercely flinging aside the thorny bushes that clungas fiercely to me, and came at last to the mouth of a cave. Creeping in, I observed that the cave was deep, and as far as the light penetrated, level. I determined to explore its recesses, though I think I should nothave been so hardy in my days of fortune. 

After treading cautiously a hundred paces, I suddenly lost my footing, and plunged with the quickness of lightning, into a hole that must havehad perpendicular sides. 

Having shot through this passage, the abode of palpable darkness andnight, I suddenly perceived a faint light. 

 As when through clouds the moon doth gleam With pallid smile. 

As this light increased, my speed decreased, so that without pain ortrouble, I was soon brought to a stand between two high mountains. Mysensations, during this remarkable passage, were similar to thoseexperienced while tossing among the billows of the ocean. On recovering, I found myself, to my great astonishment, in the same spot from which, years before, I had plunged into the subterranean regions. A moment'sreflection gave me the means to account for the decrease of speed in thelatter part of my course. The weight of the atmosphere is much greateron the surface of the globe, than below; consequently I was buoyed up bythe increasing resistance of the air towards the surface. Had this notbeen the case, I should, unquestionably, at least in my own mind, haveshot off to the moon. 

Still, being obnoxious to cavil, I will defer this hypothesis to theastronomer's closer examination. 

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

CHAPTER XVI. 

THE AUTHOR'S RETURN TO HIS FATHER-LAND, AND THE END OF THE FIFTHMONARCHY. 

Although perfectly sensible, my limbs were entirely benumbed; and I layhelpless for a long time. Meanwhile I ruminated on my singular course. The events of the past years rose one after another with clearness in mymind; particularly those of my exaltation and fame. Here was I, the latefounder of the splendid fifth monarchy, metamorphosed to a poor andhungry bachelor-of-arts; a change so terrible and unprecedented, that itmight well have disturbed the strongest brain. I seriously examined mypresent circumstances--were they real? or did I dream? Alas? the tremorsof terror and uncertainty only gave place to the pangs of sorrow andregret. 

 "Almighty Father!" I exclaimed, and towards heaven Stretched my trembling hands, "what sin provoked thy vengeance, That all thy thunders crash upon my head? Where am I? whence came I? how shall I escape Thy anger. "

Truly! should one look over the journals of all times, he will neitherin ancient nor modern history find a parallel to so great a fall; withthe single exception of that of Nebuchadnezzar, who from the greatest ofkings was changed to a dumb beast. 

I began to descend the mountain by the path which leads to Sandvig. Whenabout half way down, I observed some boys, whom I beckoned towards me, repeating the words: _Jeru pikal salim_, which in the Quamitic languagesignify: show me the way. The lads, however, were apparently frightenedat seeing a man in a strange dress, and with a hat on his headglittering with golden rays; for they rushed down the mountain in greathaste, arriving at Sandvig an hour before me. The rumor of the strangeappearance on the mountain was spread about and caused terror throughoutthe town; the notion was, that the _shoemaker of Jerusalem_ wanderedamong the mountains. This impression arose thus: the boys on beingquestioned by the townsmen, replied that I had told them who I was. Iafterwards learnt that my words, Jeru pikal salim, had been interpretedby sound, and that this clew, acted upon by fear and superstition, hadbeen developed into the strangest of fables. This story was unquestionedby this simple people, inasmuch as the adventures of the travellingshoemaker were then newly reported, and it had been asserted that he hadbeen seen a short time before in Hamburg. 

When, towards evening, I entered Sandvig, I observed that theinhabitants were collected in large flocks, to gaze at me. As Iapproached them and spoke, they all took to flight, except one old man:him I addressed, and begged of him to give me lodging at his house. Heasked me, "where I was born, whence I came, &c. " I answered him, with asigh: "When I come to your house, I will relate events that will seemincredible to you, and whose equals you will not find in any history. "The old man then took me by the hand and led me to his house. When thereI demanded drink; he gave me a glass of beer. When I recovered mybreath, after this draught, I addressed the old man thus: "You seebefore you a human being, who has been a bolt for the changing winds offortune; one, who has been pursued by a fatality more controlling andmore unhappy than was ever experienced by mortal. "

"Moral and physical revolutions may be effected in a moment, withoutsurprising men; but what has befallen me is beyond the reach of humanimagination!"

"It is the traveller's fate;" my landlord answered; "many strange eventsand changes might happen on a voyage of sixteen hundred years. "

I did not understand this, and requested him to tell me what he meant bysixteen hundred years. He replied: "If one may believe history, it isnow sixteen hundred years since Jerusalem was destroyed, and I doubtnot, venerable man, that you were already of age at its destruction. Ifwhat is said of you is true, you must have been born in the reign ofTiberius. I know that this matter is rather supposed than proved. Theinhabitants of this place, however, believe you to be the shoemaker ofJerusalem, celebrated in history, who, since the time of Christ, hastravelled about the world. Nevertheless, the more I look at you, thegreater resemblance I find to an old friend of mine, who twelve yearssince perished on the top of a neighboring mountain. " At these words, Ilooked carefully at my host. In a moment the fog was cleared from beforemy eyes. I saw before me my dear friend Abelin, in whose house, atBergen, I had spent many happy days. I ran to his embrace withoutstretched arms. "Then 'tis you, my dear Abelin! I can scarcelybelieve my eyes. Here you see Klim again, who has just returned from thesubterranean world. I am the same, who twelve years since plunged intothe mountain cave. " He fell upon my neck and with tearful eyes, demandedwhere I had been and what had happened to me. I told him all that hadoccurred. At first he would not credit me; but afterwards heacknowledged that all must have been so, for I could never have inventedsuch strange adventures. 

Abelin advised me not to repeat these things to others, and to keepmyself secluded in his house. He told the people, who rushed to hishouse to see the "shoemaker of Jerusalem, " that I had vanished; for hejustly concluded this to be the best and most satisfactory answer hecould make to an ignorant and superstitious peasantry. I remained inconcealment until clothes, more suitable to the surface of the earth, than those I brought from below, were made, when Abelin reported me tobe a relative of his, lately a student in Trondhjim, on a visit. Herecommended me to the bishop of Bergen, who promised to me the firstrectorship that should become vacant. This office was much to my taste, for it seemed to have a likeness to my former state, a school-masterbeing a miniature of royalty. The rod may be likened to the sceptre; thedesk to the throne. After waiting for a vacancy in vain, I determined, from necessity, to accept the first office I could get. At this time thesacristan of the church died; his place was offered to me by the bishopand accepted. An amusing promotion to one who had lately reigned overmany great kingdoms. Nevertheless, since nothing is so ridiculous aspoverty, and since it is foolish to throw away dirty water, before cleanis at hand, I think it would have been still more laughable to haverefused it. Fulfilling the duties of this office, I now live inphilosophic ease. 

Shortly after my induction, a marriage with a merchant's daughter wasproposed to me. I could have liked the girl, but as it was probable thatthe empress of Quama was yet alive, I did not care to make myselfobnoxious to the ban of polygamy. M. Abelin, however, into whose bosom Iwas used to pour my doubts, and all the pressures of my heart, abridgedthis fear, and advised me to marry; which I did. With this wife I havelived six years in peaceful and affectionate union. During this periodshe has borne me three fine sons, wholly worthy of their half brother, the prince of Quama. 

To my wife, I never told my subterranean adventures; but I can neverforget, for a moment, the splendor that once surrounded me. To thisday, I often express myself in signs and words, which, howeverconsistent in the mighty ruler and magnificent tyrant, are littleadapted to the humble sacristan of Bergen. 

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

THE SUPPLEMENT OF ABELIN. 

Niels Klim lived to the year 1695. His irreprehensible life and amiabledisposition endeared him to all. Yet were the priests now and then angrywith him for his great sedateness and reservedness, which they calledpride and haughtiness. I, who knew the man, wondered much at themodesty, humility and patience with which he, who had been monarch overmany nations, executed his mean and vulgar duties. So long as hisstrength permitted, he would, at a certain time in the year, ascend themountain and gaze into the cave, out of which he came to the surface. His friends observed that he always returned weeping, and immediatelyshut himself in his chamber, where he remained alone the rest of theday. 

His wife informed me, that she frequently heard him murmur in hisdreams, of armies and navies. His library consisted mostly of politicalworks; for this selection he was blamed by several, who thought thisdescription of books unfit for a sacristan. 

Of the "subterranean travels, " there is but a single copy, written byhis own hand, which is in my possession. 

I have often had it in mind to publish them, but several importantreasons have hindered me from doing so. 

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

FOOTNOTES:

[1] A porteur is one who carries his employer in a chair, from place toplace. 

[2] This name is taken to be predicated. 

 +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | Transcriber's Notes | | | | Page 30: form amended to from ("My European clothes were | | taken from me. .. . ") | | Page 43: pennyless amended to penniless | | Page 50: sapplings amended to saplings | | Page 55: pityless amended to pitiless | | Page 56: chrystal amended to crystal; nutricious amended | | to nutritious | | Page 70: Closing quotes added to the paragraph ending ". .. | | mitigate our torments. " | | Page 98: Martianic amended to Martinianic | | Page 109: sea-yoyage amended to sea-voyage | | Page 122: unwieldly amended to unwieldy | | Page 127: indescriminately amended to indiscriminately | | Page 135: Tanquites amended to Tanaquites | | Page 144: "they have made no advance because": no | | punctuation at end of paragraph _sic_ | | Page 155: Opening quotes added to the paragraph starting | | "The learned and unlearned. .. . " | | Page 157: prėeminent amended to preėminent | | Page 161: Kispusiania amended to Kispunianania | | Page 165: Tanqui amended to Tanaqui | | Page 168: Full stop after "battle array" amended to a | | comma. | | Page 172: Kespusianania amended to Kispunianania | | Page 183: hefore amended to before | | Page 185: Closing quotes added after ". .. Plunged into the | | mountain cave. " | +--------------------------------------------------------------+