Transcriber's Note: Archaic and variable spelling, as well as inconsistency in hyphenation, has been preserved as printed in the original book. [Illustration: "Oh, Josiah, " sez I, "what a sight!"--_Frontispiece_. Page125. ] AROUND THE WORLD WITH JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE BY MARIETTA HOLLEY Author of "Samantha at the St. Louis Exposition, " "My Opinion and BetseyBobbets', " "Samantha at Saratoga, " "Samantha at the World's Fair, " Etc. ILLUSTRATIONS BY H. M. PETTIT G. W. DILLINGHAM COMPANY PUBLISHERS NEW YORK Copyright, 1899, 1900 and 1905, by Marietta Holley. Entered at Stationers' Hall, London, England. (Issued September, 1905. ) Around the World with Josiah Allen's Wife. J. J. Little & Ives Co. New York AROUND THE WORLD WITH JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE CHAPTER I Our son, Thomas Jefferson, and his wife, Maggie, have been wadin'through a sea of trouble. He down with inflamatory rumatiz so a moveor jar of any kind, a fly walkin' over the bedclothes, would mostdrive him crazy; and she with nervious prostration, brought on I spozeby nussin' her pardner and her youngest boy, Thomas Josiah (calledTommy), through the measles, that had left him that spindlin' andweak-lunged that the doctor said the only thing that could tone up hissystem and heal his lungs and save his life would be a long seavoyage. He had got to be got away from the cold fall blasts ofJonesville to once. Oh! how I felt when I heard that ultimatum andrealized his danger, for Tommy wuz one of my favorites. Grandparentsort not to have favorites, but I spoze they will as long as the worldturns on its old axletrys. He looks as Thomas J. Did when he wuz his age and I married his pa andtook the child to my heart, and got his image printed there so itwon't never rub off through time or eternity. Tommy is like his pa andhe hain't like him; he has his pa's old ways of truthfulness andhonesty, and deep--why good land! there hain't no tellin' how deepthat child is. He has got big gray-blue eyes, with long dark lashesthat kinder veil his eyes when he's thinkin'; his hair is kinderdark, too, about the color his pa's wuz, and waves and crinkles some, and in the crinkles it seems as if there wuz some gold wove into thebrown. He has got a sweet mouth, and one that knows how to stay shettoo; he hain't much of a talker, only to himself; he'll set and playand talk to himself for hours and hours, and though he's affectionate, he's a independent child; if he wants to know anything the worst kindhe will set and wonder about it (he calls it wonner). He will say tohimself, "I wonner what that means. " And sometimes he will talk toCarabi about it--that is a child of his imagination, a invisibleplaymate he has always had playin' with him, talkin' to him, and Ispoze imaginin' that Carabi replies. I have asked him sometimes, "Whois Carabi, I hearn you talkin' to out in the yard? Where duz he comefrom! How duz he look?" He always acts shy about tellin', but if pressed hard he will say, "Helooks like Carabi, and he comes from right here, " kinder sweepin' hisarms round. But he talks with him by the hour, and I declare it hasmade me feel fairly pokerish to hear him. But knowin' what strangeavenoos open on every side into the mysterious atmosphere about us, the strange ether world that bounds us on every pint of the compass, and not knowin' exactly what natives walk them avenoos, I hain'tdasted to poke too much fun at him, and 'tennyrate I spozed if Tommywent a long sea-voyage Carabi would have to go too. But who wuz goin'with Tommy? Thomas J. Had got independent rich, and Maggie has comeinto a large property; they had means enough, but who wuz to go withhim? I felt the mantilly of responsibility fallin' on me before itfell, and I groaned in sperit--could I, could I agin tempt theweariness and danger of a long trip abroad, and alone at that? For Itackled Josiah on the subject before Thomas J. Importuned me, onlywith his eyes, sad and beseechin' and eloquent. And Josiah plantedhimself firm as a rock on his refusal. Never, never would he stir one step on a long sea-voyage, no indeed!he had had enough of water to last him through his life, he nevershould set foot on any water deeper than the creek, and that wuzn'tover his pumps. "But I cannot see the child die before my eyes, Josiah, and feel that I might have saved him, and yet am I to partwith the pardner of my youth and middle age? Am I to leave you, Josiah?" "I know not!" sez he wildly, "only I know that I don't set my foot onany ship, or any furren shore agin. When I sung 'hum agin from afurren shore' I meant hum agin for good and all, and here I stay. " "Oh dear me!" I sithed, "why is it that the apron strings of Duty areso often made of black crape, but yet I must cling to 'em?" "Well, " sez Josiah, "what clingin' I do will be to hum; I don't godressed up agin for months, and hang round tarvens and deepos, and Icouldn't leave the farm anyway. " But his mean wuz wild and haggard; that man worships me. But dearlittle Tommy wuz pinin' away; he must go, and to nobody but hisdevoted grandma would they trust him, and I knew that Philury and Urycould move right in and take care of everything, and at last I sez:"I will try to go, Thomas J. , I will try to go 'way off alone withTommy and leave your pa----. " But here my voice choked up and Ihurried out to give vent to some tears and groans that I wouldn'tharrow Thomas J. With. But strange, strange are the workin's ofProvidence! wonderful are the ways them apron strings of Duty will bepadded and embroidered, strange to the world's people, but not tothem that consider the wonderful material they are made of, and howthey float out from that vast atmosphere jest spoke on, that laysall round us full of riches and glory and power, and beautifulsurprises for them that cling to 'em whether or no. Right at thistime, as if our sharp distress had tapped the universe and it runcomfort, two relations of Maggie's, on their way home from Paris toSan Francisco, stopped to see their relations in Jonesville on theirown sides. Dorothy Snow, Maggie's cousin, wuz a sweet young girl, the only childof Adonirum Snow, who left Jonesville poor as a rat, went to Californyand died independent rich. She wuz jest out of school, had been toParis for a few months to take special studies in music and languages;a relation on her ma's side, a kind of gardeen, travelin' with her. Albina Meechim wuz a maiden lady from choice, so she said and I d'noas I doubted it when I got acquainted with her, for she did seem tohave a chronic dislike to man, and havin' passed danger herself herwhole mind wuz sot on preventin' Dorothy from marryin'. They come to Maggie's with a pretty, good natured French maid, notknowin' of the sickness there, and Maggie wouldn't let 'em go, as theywuz only goin' to stay a few days. They wuz hurryin' home to SanFrancisco on account of some bizness that demanded Dorothy's presencethere. But they wuz only goin' to stop there a few days, and thengoin' to start off on another long sea-voyage clear to China, stoppin'at Hawaii on the way. Warm climate! good for measles! My heart sunk asI hearn 'em tell on't. Here wuz my opportunity to have company for thelong sea-voyage. But could I--could I take it? Thomas Jefferson gentlyapproached the subject ag'in. Sez he, "Mother, mebby Tommy's lifedepends on it, and here is good company from your door. " I murmuredsunthin' about the expenses of such a trip. Sez he, "That last case I had will more than pay all expenses for youand Tommy, and father if he will go, and, " sez he, "if I can save myboy--" and his voice trembled and he stopped. "But, " I sez, "your father is able to pay for any trip we want totake. " And he says, "He won't pay a cent for this. " And there it wuz, the way made clear, good company provided from the doorstep. Dorothyslipped her soft little white hand in mine and sez, "Do go, AuntSamantha. May I call you Auntie?" sez she, as she lifted her sweetvoylet eyes to mine. She's as pretty as a pink--white complected, withwavy, golden hair and sweet, rosy lips and cheeks. And I sez, "Yes, you dear little creater, you may call me aunt inwelcome, and we be related in a way, " sez I. Sez Miss Meechim, "We shall consider it a great boon if you go withus. And dear little Tommy, it will add greatly to the pleasure of ourtrip. We only expected to have three in our company. " "Who is the third?" sez I. "My nephew, Robert Strong. He has been abroad with us, but had to godirectly home to San Francisco to attend to his business before hecould go on this long trip; he will join us there. We expect to go toHawaii and the Philippines, and Japan and China, and perhaps Egypt. " "And that will be just what you will enjoy, mother, " sez Thomas J. Sez I, in a strange axent, "I never laid plans for going to China, but, " sez I, "I do feel that I would love to see the Empress, Si Ann. There is sunthin' that the widder Heinfong ort to know. " Thomas J. Asked me what it wuz, but I gently declined to answer, merely sayin' that it was a matter of duty, and so I told Miss Meechimwhen she asked about it. She is so big feelin' that it raised me upconsiderable to think that I had business with a Empress. But Ianswered her evasive, and agin I giv vent to a low groan, and sez tomyself, "Can I let the Pacific Ocean roll between me and Josiah? WillDuty's apron string hold up under the strain, or will it break withme? Will it stretch out clear to China? And oh! will my heart stringsthat are wrapped completely round that man, will they stretch out theenormous length they will have to and still keep hull?" I knew not. Iwuz a prey to overwhelmin' emotions, even as I did up my bestnight-gowns and sheepshead night-caps and sewed clean lace in the neckand sleeves of my parmetty and gray alpaca and got down my hairtrunk, for I knew that I must hang onto that apron string no matterwhere it carried me to. Waitstill Webb come and made up some things Imust have, and as preparations went on my pardner's face grew haggardand wan from day to day, and he acted as if he knew not what he wuzdoin'. Why, the day I got down my trunk I see him start for the barnwith the accordeon in a pan. He sot out to get milk for the calf. Hewas nearly wild. He hadn't been so good to me in over four years. Truly, a threatenedabsence of female pardners is some like a big mustard poultice appliedto the manly breast drawin' out the concealed stores of tenderness anddevotion that we know are there all the time, but sometimes kep' hidfor years and years. He urged me to eat more than wuz good for me--rich stuff that I neverdid eat--and bought me candy, which I sarahuptishly fed to the pup. And he follered me round with footstools, and het the soap stun hotterthan wuz good for my feet, and urged me to keep out of drafts. And one day he sez to me with a anxious face: "If you do go, Samanthy, I wouldn't write about your trip--I am afraidit will be too much for you--I am afraid it will tire your head toomuch. I know it would mine. " And then I say to him in a tender axent, for his devotion trulytouched me: "There is a difference in heads, Josiah. " But he looked so worried that I most promised him I wouldn't try towrite about the trip--oh! how that man loves me, and I him viseyversey. And so the days passed, little Tommy pale and pimpin', ThomasJ. Lookin' more cheerful as he thought his ma wuzn't goin' to failhim, Maggie tryin' to keep up and tend to havin' Tommy's clothesfixed; she hated to have him go, and wanted him to go. She and ThomasJ. Wuz clingin' to that string, black as a coal, and hash feelin' toour fingers. Miss Meechim and Dorothy wuz as happy as could be. MissMeechim wuz tall and slim and very genteel, and sandy complected, andshe confided her rulin' passion to me the first time I see her for anylength of time. "I want Dorothy to be a bachelor maid, " sez she. "I am determined thatshe shall not marry anyone. And you don't know, " sez she fervently, "what a help my nephew, Robert Strong, has been to me in protectin'Dorothy from lovers. I am so thankful he is going with us on this longtrip. He is good as gold and very rich; but he has wrong ideas abouthis wealth. He says that he only holds it in trust, and he has builtround his big manufactory, just outside of San Francisco, what hecalls a City of Justice, where his workmen are as well cared for andhappy as he is. That is very wrong, I have told him repeatedly. It isbreaking down the Scriptures, which teaches the poor their duty to therich, and gently admonishes the rich to look down upon and guide thepoor. How can the Scriptures be fulfilled if the rich lift up the poorand make them wealthy? I trust that Robert will see his mistake intime, before he makes all his workmen wealthy. But, oh, he is such ahelp to me in protecting Dorothy from lovers. " "How duz he protect her?" sez I. "Oh, he has such tact. He knows just how opposed I am to matrimony inthe abstract and concrete, and he has managed gently but firmly tolead Dorothy away from the dangers about her. Now, he don't care fordancing at all; but there was a young man at home who wuz just winningher heart completely with his dexterity with his heels, as you maysay. He was the most graceful dancer and Dorothy dotes on dancing. Itold my trouble to Robert, and what should that boy do but make aperfect martyr of himself, and after a few lessons danced so muchbetter that Dorothy wuz turned from her fancy. And one of her suitorshad such a melodious voice, he wuz fairly singin' his way into herheart, and I confided my fears to Robert, and he immediatelyresponded, dear boy. He just practised self-denial again, andcommenced singing with her himself, and his sweet, clear tenor voiceentirely drowned out the deep basso I had feared. Of course, Robertdid it to please me and from principle. I taught him early self-denialand the pleasures of martyrdom. Of course, I never expected he wouldcarry my teachings to such an extent as he has in his business life. Idid not mean it to extend to worldly matters; I meant it to be morewhat the Bible calls 'the workings of the spirit. ' But he willdoubtless feel different as he gets older. And, oh, he is such a helpto me with Dorothy. Now, on this trip he knows my fears, and howsedulously I have guarded Dorothy from the tender passion, and it wuzjust like him to put his own desires in the background and go with usto help protect her. " "How did you git such dretful fears of marriage?" sez I. "Men aretryin' lots of times, and it takes considerable religion to git alongwith one without jawin' more or less. But, after all, I d'no what Ishould do without my pardner--I think the world on him, and have lovedto think I could put out my hand any time and be stayed and comfortedby his presence. I should feel dretful lost and wobblin' without him, "sez I, with a deep sithe, "though I well know his sect's shortcomin's. But I never felt towards 'em as you do, even in my most maddest times, when Josiah had been the tryinest and most provokinest. " "Well, " sez she, "my father spent all my mother's money on horse-racin', save a few thousand which he had invested for her, and she felt wuzsafe, but he took that to run away with a bally girl, and squandered itall on her and died on the town. My eldest sister's husband beat herwith a poker, and throwed her out of a three-story front in SanFrancisco, and she landin' on a syringea tree wuz saved to git adivorce from him and also from her second and third husbands forcruelty, after which she gave up matrimony and opened a boarding-house, bitter in spirit, but a good calculator. I lived with her when a younggirl, and imbibed her dislike for matrimony, which wuz helped furtherby sad experiences of my own, which is needless to particularize. (Ihearn afterwards that she had three disappointments runnin', bein'humbly and poor in purse. ) "And now, " sez she, "I am as well grounded against matrimony as anywoman can be, and my whole energies are aimed on teaching Dorothy thesame belief I hold. " "Well, " sez I, "your folks have suffered dretful from men and I don'twonder you feel as you do. But what I am a goin' to do to be separatedfrom my husband durin' this voyage is more than I can tell. " And Igroaned a deep holler groan. "Why, I haven't told you half, " sez she. "All of my sisters but onehad trouble with their husbands. Robert's step-ma wuz the only one whohad a good husband, but he died before they'd been married a year, andshe follered him in six months, leaving twins, who died also, and Itook Robert, to whom I had got attached, to the boarding-house, andtook care on him until he wuz sent away to school and college. His paleft plenty of money, " sez she, "and a big fortune when he came ofage, which he has spent in the foolish way I have told you of, or agreat part of it. " Well, at this juncture we wuz interrupted, and didn't resoom theconversation until some days afterwards, though I wuz dretfulinterested in the big manufactory of Robert Strong's, that bigco-working scheme. (I had hearn Thomas J. Commend it warmly. ) At last the day come for me to start. I waked up feelin' a strangeweight on my heart. I had dremp Philury had sot the soap stun on mychest. But no soap stun wuz ever so hard and heavy as my grief. Josiahand I wuz to be parted! Could it be so? Could I live through it? Hewuz out in the wood-house kitchen pretendin' to file a saw. File a sawbefore breakfast! He took that gratin' job to hide his groans; he wuzweepin'; his red eyes betrayed him. Philury got a good breakfast whichwe couldn't eat. My trunk wuz packed and in the democrat. Theneighborin' wimmen brung me warm good-byes and bokays offen theirhouse plants, and sister Sypher sent me some woosted flowers, which Ileft to home, and some caraway seed to nibble on my tower which Itook. She that wuz Arvilly Lanfeare brought me a bottle of bam made out ofthe bark of the bam of Gilead tree, to use in case I should getbruised or smashed on the train, and also two pig's bladders blowedup, which she wanted me to wear constant on the water to help mefloat. She had painted on one of 'em the Jonesville meetin'-house, thinkin', I spoze, the steeple might bring lofty thoughts to me inhurrycains or cyclones. And on the other one she had painted in bigletters the title of the book she is agent for--"The Twin Crimes ofAmerica: Intemperance and Greed!" I thought it wuz real cunning inArvilly to combine so beautifully kindness and business. There is somuch in advertising. They looked real well, but I didn't see how I wuzgoin' to wear 'em over my bask waist. Arvilly said she wanted to gowith me the worst kind. Says she: "I hain't felt so much like goin' anywhere sense I deserted. " (Arvillydid enlist in the Cuban army, and deserted, and they couldn't touchher for it--of which more anon. ) And I sez to her: "I wish you could go, Arvilly; I believe it would doyou good after what you have went through. " Well, the last minute come and Ury took us to the train. Josiah wentwith me, but he couldn't have driv no more than a mournin' weedcould. I parted with the children, and--oh! it wuz a hard wrench on my heartto part with Thomas J. ; took pale little Tommy in my arms, likepullin' out his pa's heart-strings--and his ma's, too--and at last thedeepo wuz reached. As we went in we see old Miss Burpy from 'way back of Loontown. Shewuz never on the cars before, or see 'em, but she wuz sent for by heroldest boy who lives in the city. She was settin' in a big rocken'-chair rocken voyolently, and as Iwent past her she says: "Have we got to New York yet?" "Why, " sez I, "we haint started. " She sez, "I thought I wuz in the convenience now a-travellin'. " "Oh, no, " I sez, "the conveyance haint come yet, you will heer itscreechin' along pretty soon. " Anon we hearn the train thunderin' towards us. I parted with TirzahAnn and Whitfield, havin' shook hands with Ury before; and all othersbeing parted from, I had to, yes, I had to, bid my beloved pardneradoo. And with a almost breakin' heart clum into the car, Miss Meechimand Dorothy and Aronette having preceeded me before hand. Yes, I leftmy own Josiah behind me, with his bandanna pressed to his eyes. Could I leave him? At the last minute I leaned out of the car winderand sez with a choken voice: "Josiah, if we never meet again on Jonesville sile, remember there isa place where partin's and steam engines are no more. " His face wuz covered with his bandanna, from whence issued deepgroans, and I felt I must be calm to boy him up, and I sez: "Be sure, Josiah, to keep your feet dry, take your cough medicinereglar, go to meetin' stiddy, keep the pumps from freezin', and mayGod bless you, " sez I. And then again I busted into tears. The hard-hearted engine snortedand puffed, and we wuz off. CHAPTER II As the snortin' and skornful actin' engine tore my body away fromJonesville, I sot nearly bathed in tears for some time till I wuzaware that little Tommy wuz weepin' also, frightened I spoze by hisgrandma's grief, and then I knew it wuz my duty to compose myself, andI summoned all my fortitude, put my handkerchief in my pocket, andgive Tommy a cream cookey, which calmed his worst agony. I thenrecognized and passed the compliments of the day with Miss Meechim andDorothy and pretty little Aronette, who wuz puttin' away our wraps anddoin' all she could for the comfort of the hull of us. Seein' myagitation, she took Tommy in her arms and told him some stories, goodones, I guess, for they made Tommy stop cryin' and go to laughin', specially as she punctuated the stories with some chocolate drops. Dorothy looked sweet as a rose and wuz as sweet. Miss Meechim come andsot down by me, but she seemed to me like a furiner; I wuz dwellin' ina fur off realm Miss Meechim had never stepped her foot in, the realmof Wedded Love and Pardner Reminiscences. What did Miss Meechim knowof that hallowed clime? What did she know of the grief that wrung myheart? Men wuz to her like shadders; her heart spoke anotherlanguage. Thinkin' that it would mebbe git my mind off a little from my idol, Iasked her again about Robert Strong's City of Justice; sez I, "It hasrun in my mind considerable since you spoke on't; I don't think I everhearn the name of any place I liked so well, City of Justice! Why thename fairly takes hold of my heart-strings, " sez I; "has he made wellby his big manufactory?" "Why, yes, fairly well, " sez she, "but he has strange ideas. He sayshe don't want to coin a big fortune out of other men's sweat andbrains. He wants to march on with the great army of toilers, and notbe carried ahead of it on a down bed. He says he wants to feel that heis wronging no man by amassing wealth out of the half-paid labor oftheir best years, and that he is satisfied with an equal andreasonable share of the labor and capital invested. He has the best ofmen in his employ and they are all well paid and industrious; allwell-to-do, able to live well, educate their children well, and havetime for some culture and recreation for themselves and theirfamilies. I told him that his ideas were Utopian, but he says theyhave succeeded even better than he expected they would. But there willcome a crash some time, I am sure. There must be rich and there mustbe poor in this world, or the Scriptures will not be fulfilled. " Sez I, "There ain't no need to be such a vast army of poverty marchingon to the almshouse and grave, if it wuzn't for the dram-shop temptin'poor human nater, and the greed of the world, and the cowardice andindifference of the Church of Christ. Enough money is squandered forstuff that degrades and destroys to feed and clothe all the hungry andnaked children of the world. " "Oh, " sez Miss Meechim, "I don't believe all this talk and clamorabout prohibition. My people all drank genteelly, and though of courseit was drink that led to the agony and divorces of three of mysisters, and my father's first downfall, yet I have always consideredthat moderate drinking was genteel. Our family physician always drankgenteel, and our clergyman always kept it in his wine cellar, and ifpeople would only exert self control and drink genteel, there would beno danger. " "How duz Robert Strong feel about it?" sez I. "Oh, he is a fanatic on the subject; he won't employ a man who drinksat all. He says that the city he is founding is a City of Justice, andit is not just for one member of a family to do anything to endangerthe safety and happiness of the rest; so on that ground alone hewouldn't brook any drinking in his model city. There are no very richones there, and absolutely no poor ones; he is completely obliteratingthe barriers that always have, and I believe always should existbetween the rich and the poor. Sez I, 'Robert, you are sacrilegiouslysetting aside the Saviour's words, "the poor ye shall always have withyou. "' "And he said there was another verse that our Lord incorporated in histeachings and the whole of his life-work, that he was trying to carryout: 'Do unto others as ye would have them to do unto you. ' He saidthat love and justice was the foundation and cap-stone of ourSaviour's life and work and he was trying in his weak way to carrythem out in his own life and work. Robert talked well, " sez she, "andI must confess that to the outward eye his City of Justice is in ahappy and flourishing condition, easy hours of work, happy faces ofmen, women and children as they work or play or study. It looks well, but as I always tell him, there is a weak spot in it somewhere. " "What duz he say to that?" sez I, dretful interested in the story. "Why, he says the only weak spot in it is his own incompetence andinability to carry out the Christ idea of love and justice as he wantsto. " "I wish I could see that City of Justice, " sez I dreamily, for mymind's eye seemed to look up to Robert Strong in reverence andadmiration. "Well, " sez she, "I must say that it is a beautiful place;it is founded on a natural terrace that rises up from a broad, beautiful, green plain, flashing rivers run through the valley, andback of it rises the mountains. " "Like as the mountains are about Jerusalem, " sez I. "Yes, a beautiful clear stream rushes down the mountain side from themelting snow on top, but warmed by the southern sun, as it flowsthrough the fertile land, it is warm and sweet as it reaches Robert'splace. And Robert says, " continued Miss Meechim, "that that is justhow old prejudices and injustices will melt like the cold snow andflow in a healing stream through the world. He talks well, Robertdoes. And oh, what a help he has been to me with Dorothy!" "What duz she say about it?" sez I. "She does not say so, but I believe she thinks as I do about theinfeasibility as well as the intrinsic depravity of disproving theScriptures. " "Well, " sez I, "Robert was right about the mission of our Lord beingto extend justice and mercy, and bring the heart of the world intosweetness, light and love. His whole life was love, self-sacrifice anddevotion, and I believe that Robert is in the right on't. " "Oh, Robert is undoubtedly following his ideas of right, but theyclash with mine, " sez Miss Meechim, shakin' her head sadly, "and Ithink he will see his error in time. " Here Miss Meechim stopped abruptly to look apprehensively at a youngman that I knew wuz a Jonesville husband and father of twins. He waslookin' admirin'ly at Dorothy, and Miss Meechim went and sot downbetween 'em, and Tommy come and set with me agin. Tommy leaned up aginst me and looked out of the car window and sezkinder low to himself: "I wonner what makes the smoke roll and roll up so and feather out thesky, and I wonner what my papa and my mama is doin' and what mygrandpa will do--they will be so lonesome?" Oh, how his innocent wordspierced my heart anew, and he begun to kinder whimper agin, andAronette, good little creeter, come up and gin him an orange out ofthe lunch-basket she had. Well, we got to New York that evenin' and I wuz glad to think thateverybody wuz well there, or so as to git about, for they wuz allthere at the deepo, excep' them that wuz in the street, but we gotsafe through the noise and confusion to a big, high tarven, withprices as high as its ruff and flagpole. Miss Meechim got for her andDorothy what she called "sweet rooms, " three on 'em in a row, one foreach on 'em and a little one for Aronette. But I d'no as they wuz anysweeter than mine, though mine cost less and wuz on the back of thehouse where it wuzn't so noisy. Tommy and I occupied one room; he hada little cot-bed made up for him. Indeed, I groaned out as I sot me down in a big chair, if he wuz here, the pardner of my youth and middle age, no room Miss Meechim everlooked on wuz so sweet as this would be. But alas! he wuz fur away. Jonesville held on to my idol and we wuz parted away from each other. But I went down to supper, which they called dinner, and see thatTommy had things for his comfort and eat sunthin' myself, for I had tosupport life, yes, strength had to be got to cling to that blackstring that I had holt on, and vittles had to supply some of thatstrength, though religion and principle supplied the biggest heft. Miss Meechim and Aronette wuz in splendid sperits, and aftersup--dinner went out to the theatre to see a noted tragedy acted, andthey asked me to accompany and go with 'em, for I spoze that my lookswuz melancholy and deprested in extreme, Aronette offerin' to takecare of Tommy if I wanted to go. But I sez, "No, I have got all the tragedy in my own bosom that I can'tend to. " And in spite of my cast-iron resolution tears busted outunder my eyeleds and trickled down my nose. They didn't see it, myback wuz turned, and my nose is a big one anyway and could accommodatea good many tears. But I controlled my agony of mind. I walked round with Tommy for aspell and showed him all the beauties of the place, which wuz many, sot down with him for a spell in the big, richly-furnished parlors, but cold and lonesome lookin' after all, for the love-light of homewuz lackin', and looked at the glittering throng passing andrepassing; but the wimmen looked fur off to me and the men wuz likeshadders, only one man seemed a reality to me, and he wuz smallboneded and fur away. And then we went to our room. I read to Tommyfor a spell out of a good little book I bought, and then hearn him sayhis prayers, his innocent voice askin' for blessin's from on high forhis parents and my own beloved lonely one, and then I tucked him intohis little cot and sot down and writ a letter to my dear Josiah, tearsdribblin' down onnoticed while I did so. For we had promised to write to each other every day of our lives, else I could not, could not have borne the separation, and I alsobegun a letter to Philury. I laid out to put down things that I wantedher to 'tend to that I thought on from day to day after I got away, and then send it to her bime by. Sez I: "Philury, be sure and put woolen sheets on Josiah's bed if it growscolder, and heat the soap stun for him and see that he wears hiswoolen-backed vest, takin' it off if it moderates. Tend to his morals, Philury, men are prone to backslide; start him off reg'lar to meetin', keep clean bandannas in his pocket, let him wear his gingham neckties, he'll cry a good deal and it haint no use to spile his silk ones. Oh, Philury! you won't lose nothin' if you are good to that dear man. Putsalt enough on the pork when you kill, and don't let Josiah eat toomuch sassage. And so no more to-night, to be continude. " The next morning I got two letters from my pardner. He had writ aletter right there in the deepo before he went home, and also anotheron his arrival there. Agony wuz in every word; oh, how wuz we goin' tobear it! But I must not make my readers onhappy; no I must harrow them up nomore, I must spread the poultice of silence on the deep gaping woondand go on with the sombry history. After breakfast Miss Meechim got abig, handsome carriage, drawed by two prancin' steeds, held in by aman buttoned up to his chin, and invited me to take Tommy and go withher and Dorothy up to the Park, which I did. They wuz eloquent inpraises of that beautiful place; the smooth, broad roads, borderedwith tall trees, whose slim branches stood out against the blue skylike pictures. The crowds of elegant equipages, filled with handsomelookin' folks in galy attire that thronged them roads. The Mall, withits stately beauty, the statutes that lined the way ever and anon. Themassive walls of the Museum, the beautiful lake and rivulets, spannedby handsome bridges. It wuz a fair seen, a fair seen--underneathbeauty of the rarest kind, and overhead a clear, cloudless sky. Miss Meechim wuz happy, though she didn't like the admiring maleglances at Dorothy's fresh, young beauty, and tried to ward 'em offwith her lace-trimmed muff, but couldn't. Tommy wuz in pretty goodsperits and didn't look quite so pale as when we left home, and hewonnered at the white statutes, and kinder talked to himself, or toCarabi about 'em, and I kinder gathered from what he said that hethought they wuz ghosts, and I thought that he wuz kinder reassurin'Carabi that they wouldn't hurt him, and he wonnered at the mountedpolicemen who he took to be soldiers, and at all the beauty with whichwe wuz surrounded. And I--I kep' as cheerful a face as I could on theoutside, but always between me and Beauty, in whatsoever guise itappeared, wuz a bald head, a small-sized figger. Yes, it weighed butlittle by the steelyards, but it shaddered lovely Central Park, themost beautiful park in the world, and the hull universe for me. But Ikep' a calm frame outside; I answered Miss Meechim's remarksmekanically and soothed her nervous apprehensions as well as I couldas she glanced fearfully at male admirers by remarkin' in a casual wayto her "that New York and the hull world wuz full of pretty women andgirls, " which made her look calmer, and then I fell in to once withher scheme of drivin' up the long, handsome Boolevard, acrost thelong bridge, up to the tomb of Our Hero, General Grant. Hallowed place! dear and precious to the hull country. The place wherethe ashes lie that wuz once the casket of that brave heart. Goodhusband, kind father, true friend, great General, grand Hero, sleepinghere by the murmuring waters of the stream he loved, in the city ofhis choice, sleeping sweetly and calmly while the whole world wakes todo him honor and cherish and revere his memory. I had big emotions here, I always did, and spoze I always shall. But, alas! true it wuz that even over the memory of that matchless Hero rizup in my heart the remembrance of one who wuz never heroic, onheededand onthought on by his country, but--oh! how dear to me! The memory of his words, often terse and short specially beforemeal-time, echoed high above the memory of him who talked with Kingsand Emperors, ruled armies and hushed the seething battle-cry, and thenation's clamor with "Let us have peace. " But I will not agin fall into harrow, or drag my readers there, butwill simply state that, in all the seens of beauty and grandeur welooked on that day--and Miss Meechim wanted to see all and everything, from magestick meetin' houses and mansions, bearin' the stamp ofmillions of dollars, beautiful arches lifted up to heroes and thenational honor, even down to the Brooklyn Bridge and the Goddess ofLiberty--over all that memory rained supreme. The Goddess of Liberty holdin' aloft her blazin' torch rousted up theenthusiastick admiration of Dorothy and Miss Meechim. But I thought asI looked on it that she kinder lifted her arm some as I had seen mydear pardner lift his up when he wuz a-fixin' a stove pipe overhead;and that long span uniting New York and Brooklyn only brought to methoughts of the length and strength of that apron-string to which Iclung and must cling even though death ensued. Well, after a long time of sight-seeing we returned to our hotel, and, after dinner, which they called luncheon, I laid down a spellwith Tommy, for I felt indeed tuckered out with my emotions outsideand inside. Tommy dropped off to sleep to once like a lamb, and Ibein' beat out, lost myself, too, and evening wuz almost lettin' downher mantilly spangled with stars, when I woke, Tommy still sleepin'peacefully, every minute bringin' health and strength to him I knew. Miss Meechim and Dorothy had been to some of the big department storeswhere you can buy everything under one ruff from a elephant to atoothpick, and have a picture gallery and concert throwed in. They hadgot a big trunk full of things to wear. I wondered what they wanted of'em when they wuz goin' off on another long journey so soon; butconsidered that it wuzn't my funeral or my tradin' so said nothin'. Anon we went down and had a good supper, which they called dinner, after which they went to the opera. Aronette tended to packin' theirclothes, and offered to help me pack. But as I told her I hadn'tonpacked nothin' but my nightgown and sheepshead night-cap I could gitalong with it, specially as sheepshead night-caps packed easier thanfull crowned ones. So I took Tommy out for a little walk on the broad beautifulsidewalks, and it diverted him to see the crowds of handsomely dressedmen and women all seemin' to hurry to git to some place right off, andthe children who didn't seem to be in any hurry, and in seein' the bigcarriages roll by, some drawed by prancin' horses, and some by nothin'at all, so fur as we could see, which rousted up Tommy's wonder, andit all diverted him a little and mebby it did me too, and then weretired to our room and had a middlin' good night's rest, thoughhanted by Jonesville dreams, and the next morning we left forChicago. Dorothy had never seen Niagara Falls or Saratoga, so we went a fewmilds out of our way that she might see Saratoga's monster hotels, the biggest in the world; and take a drink of the healin' waters ofthe springs that gushes up so different right by the side of eachother, showin' what a rich reservoir the earth is, if we only knew howto tap it, and where. We didn't stay at Saratoga only over one train; but drove through thebroad handsome streets, and walked through beautiful Congress Park, and then away to Niagara Falls. It wuz a bright moonlight night when we stood on the bridge not farfrom the tarven where we had our sup--dinner. And Dorothy and MissMeechim wuz almost speechless with awe and admiration, they said "Oh, how sublime! Oh! how grand!" as they see the enormous body of watersweepin' down that immense distance. The hull waters of the hull chainof Lakes, or inland Seas, sweepin' down in one great avalanche ofwater. I wanted dretfully to go and see the place where the cunning andwisdom of man has set a trap to ketch the power of that great liquidGeni, who has ruled it over his mighty watery kingdom sence thecreation, and I spoze always calculated to; throwin' men about, anddrawin' 'em down into its whirlpool jest like forest leaves or bladesof grass. Who would have dremp chainin' down that resistless, mighty force andmake it bile tea-kettles; and light babys to their trundle beds, andturn coffee mills, and light up meetin' houses, and draw canal boatsand propel long trains of cars. How it roared and took on when thesubject wuz first broke to it. But it had to yield, as the twentiethcentury approached and the millennium drew nigh; men not so very bigboned either, but knowin' quite a lot, jest chained that great roarin'obstropulous Geni, and has made it do good work. After rulin' thecenturies with a high hand nobody dastin' to go nigh it, it wuz thatpowerful and awful in its might and magesty, it has been made toserve, jest as the Bible sez: "He that is mightiest amongst you shall be your servant, " or words tothat effect. But it is a sight, I spoze, to see all the performances they had to gothrough, the hard labor of years and years, to persuade Niagara to dowhat they had planned for it to do. But as I say, this great giant is chained by one foot, as it were, andis doin' good day's works, and no knowin' how much more will be put onit to do when the rest of its strength is buckled down to work. Allover the great Empire State, mebby, he will have to light the evenin'lamps, and cook the mornin' meals, and bring acrost the continent thefood he cooks, and turn the mills that grinds the flour to make thebread he toasts, and sow the wheat that makes the flour, and talk forall the millions of people and play their music for them--I d'no whathe won't be made to do, and Josiah don't, but I spoze it is a sight tosee the monster trap they built to hold this great Force. We wanted togo there, but hadn't time. But to resoom backwards a spell. Miss Meechim and Dorothy wasperfectly awe-struck to see and hear the Falls, and I didn't wonder. But I had seen it before with my beloved pardner by my side, and itseemed to me as if Niagara missed him, and its great voice seemed toroar out: "Where is Josiah? Where is Josiah? Why are you here withouthim? Swish, swash, roar, roar, Where is Josiah? Where? Roar! Where?" Oh, the emotions I had as I stood there under the cold light of themoon, cold waters rushin' down into a cold tomb; cold as a frog thehull thing seemed, and full of a infinite desolation. But I knew thatif Love had stood there by my side, personified in a small-sizedfigger, the hull seen would have bloomed rosy. Yes, as I listened tothe awestruck, admirin' axents of the twain with me, them words of thePoet come back to me: "How the light of the hull life dies when loveis gone. " "Oh, " sez Miss Meechim, as we walked back to the tarven, takin'in the sooveneer store on the way, "oh, what a immense body ofwater! how tumultous it sweeps down into the abyss below!" I answeredmekanically, for I thought of one who wuz also tumultous at times, but after a good meal subsided down into quiet, some as the waters ofNiagara did after a spell. And Dorothy sez, "How the grand triumphal march of the great Lakes, asthey hurry onwards towards the ocean, shakes the very earth in theirwild haste. " I sez mekanically, "Yes, indeed!" but my thoughts wuz of one who hadoften pranced 'round and tromped, and even kicked in his haste, andshook the wood-house floor. Ah, how, how could I forgit him? And at the sooveneer stores, oh, how I wuz reminded of him there! howhe had cautioned me aginst buyin' in that very spot; how he had stoodby me till he had led me forth empty-handed towards the tarven. Ahwell, I tried to shake off my gloom, and Tommy waked up soon after ourreturn (Aronette, good little creeter! had stayed right by him), andwe all had a good meal, and then embarked on the sleeping car. I laidTommy out carefully on the top shelf, and covered him up, and thenpartially ondressed and stretched my own weary frame on my own shelfand tried to woo the embrace of Morphine, but I could not, so I got upand kinder sot, and took out my pad and writ a little more in myletter to my help. Sez I, "Philury, if Josiah takes cold, steep some lobely and catnip, half and half; if he won't take it Ury must hold him and you pour itdown. Don't sell yourself short of eggs, Josiah loves 'em and theycost high out of season. Don't let the neighbors put upon him becauseI went off and left him. Give my love to Waitstill Webb and ElderWhite, give it to 'em simeltaneous and together, tell 'em how much Ithink on 'em both for the good they're doin'. Tell Arvilly I oftenthink of her and what she has went through and pity her. Give a hen tothe widder Gowdey for Christmas. Let Josiah carry it, or no, I guessUry had better, I am away and folks might talk. The ketch on theoutside suller door had better be fixed so it can't blow open. Josiah's thickest socks are in the under draw, and the pieces to mendhis overhalls in a calico bag behind the clothespress door. Guard thatman like the apples in your eyes, Philury, and you'll be glad bime by. So no more. To be continude. " Agin I laid down and tried to sleep; in vain, my thoughts, my heartwuz in Jonesville, so I riz up agin as fur as I could and took myhandkerchief pin offen the curtain where I had pinned it and looked atit long and sadly. I hadn't took any picture of Josiah with me, Ihadn't but one and wuz afraid I should lose it. He hain't been willin'to be took sence he wuz bald, and I knew that his picture wuz engravedon my heart in deeper lines than any camera or kodak could do it. ButI had a handkerchief pin that looked like him, I bought it to theWorld's Fair, it wuz took of Columbus. You know Columbus wuz achangeable lookin' critter in his pictures, if he looked like all on'em he must have been fitty, and Miss Columbus must have had a hardtime to git along with him. This looked like Josiah, only with morehair, but I held my thumb over the top, and I could almost hear Josiahspeak. I might have had a lock of his hair to wep' over, but mydevoted love kep' me from takin' it; I knew that he couldn't afford tospare a hair with winter comin' on. But I felt that I must composemyself, for my restless moves had waked Tommy up. The sullen roar ofthe wheels underneath me kep' kinder hunchin' me up every little whileif I forgot myself for a minute, twittin' me that my pardner had letme go away from him; I almost thought I heard once or twice the echo, Grass Widder! soundin' out under the crunchin' roar and rattle of thewheels, but then I turned right over on my shelf and sez in my agonyof sperit: Not that--not grass. And Tommy called down, "What say, grandma?" And I reached up and tookholt of his soft, warm little hand and sez: "Go to sleep, Tommy, grandma is here. " "You said sunthin' about grass, grandma. " And I sez, "How green the grass is in the spring, Tommy, under theorchard trees and in the door-yard. How pretty the sun shines on itand the moonlight, and grandpa is there, Tommy, and Peace and Rest andHappiness, and my heart is there, too, Tommy, " and I most sobbed thelast words. And Tommy sez, "Hain't your heart here too, grandma? You act as if youwuz 'fraid. You said when I prayed jest now that God would watch overus. " "And he will, Tommy, he will take care of us and of all them I love. "And leanin' my weary and mournful sperit on that thought, and leanin'hard, I finally dropped off into the arms of Morphine. CHAPTER III Well, we reached Chicago with no further coincidence and put up to abig hotel kep' by Mr. And Miss Parmer. It seems that besides all themoney I had been provided with, Thomas J. Had gin a lot of money toMiss Meechim to use for me if she see me try to stent myself any, andhe had gin particular orders that we should go to the same hotels theydid and fare jest as well, so they wanted to go to the tarven kep' byMr. Parmerses folks, and we did. I felt real kinder mortified to think that I didn't pay no attentionto Mr. And Miss Parmer; I didn't see 'em at all whilst I wuz there. But I spoze she wuz busy helpin' her hired girls, it must take a sightof work to cook for such a raft of folks, and it took the most of histime to provide. Well, we all took a long ride round Chicago; Miss Meechim wanted tosee the most she could in the shortest time. So we driv throughLincoln Park, so beautiful as to be even worthy of its name, and oneor two other beautiful parks and boolevards and Lake Shore drives. Andwe went at my request to see the Woman's Temperance Building; I hadgot considerable tired by that time, and, oh, how a woman's tiredheart longs for the only true rest, the heart rest of love. As we wentup the beautiful, open-work alleviator, I felt, oh, that this thingwas swinging me off to Jonesville, acrost the waste of sea and land. But immegiately the thought come "Duty's apron-strings, " and I wuzcalm agin. But all the time I wuz there talkin' to them noble wimmen, dear to mebecause they're tacklin' the most needed work under the heavens, wagin' the most holy war, and tacklin' it without any help as you maysay from Uncle Sam, good-natered, shiftless old creeter, well meanin', I believe, but jest led in blinders up and down the earth by theWhiskey Power that controls State and Church to-day, and they maydispute it if they want to, but it is true as the book of Job, andfuller of biles and all other impurities and tribulations than Jobever wuz, and heaven only knows how it is goin' to end. But to resoom backwards. Lofty and inspirin' wuz the talks I had withthe noble ones whose names are on the list of temperance here and theLamb's Book of Life. How our hearts burnt within us, and how the"blest tie that binds" seemed to link us clost together; when, alas!in my soarinest moments, as I looked off with my mind's eye onto adark world beginnin' to be belted and lightened by the White Ribbon, my heart fell almost below my belt ribbin' as I thought of one who hadtalked light about my W. T. C. U. Doin's, but wuz at heart a believerand a abstainer and a member of the Jonesville Sons of Temperance. A little later we stood and looked on one of the great grainelevators, histin' up in its strong grip hull fields of wheat and cornat a time. Ah! among all the wonderin' and awe-struck admiration ofthem about me, how my mind soared off on the dear bald head afar, hewho had so often sowed the spring and reaped the autumn ears on thehills and dales of Jonesville, sweet land! dear one! when should I seethee again? And as we walked through one of the enormous stock yards, oh! how thebellerin' of them cattle confined there put me in mind of the choiceof my youth and joy of my middle age. Wuz he too bellerin' at thatmoment, shet up as he wuz by environin' circumstances from her heworshipped. And so it went on, sad things put me in mind of him and joyful things, all, all speakin' of him, and how, how wuz I to brook the separation?But I will cease to harrow the reader's tender bosom. Dry your tears, reader, I will proceed onwards. The next day we sot off for California, via Salt Lake and Denver. Jest as we left the tarven at Chicago our mail wuz put in our hands, forwarded by the Jonesville postmaster accordin' to promise; but not aword from my pardner, roustin' up my apprehensions afresh. Had hisfond heart broken under the too great strain? Had he passed awaycallin' on my name? My tears dribbled down onto my dress waist, though I tried to stanch'em with my snowy linen handkerchief. Tommy's tears, too, began tofall, seein' which I grabbed holt of Duty's black apron-strings andwuz agin calm on the outside, and handed Tommy a chocolate drop (whichhealed his woond), although on the inside my heart kep' on a seethin'reservoir of agony and forbodin's. The next day, as I sot in my comfortable easy chair on the car, knittin' a little, tryin' to take my mind offen trouble and Josiah, Tommy wuz settin' by my side, and Miss Meechim and Dorothy nigh by. Aronette, like a little angel of Help, fixin' the cushions under ourfeet, brushin' the dust offen her mistresses dresses, or pickin' up mystitches when in my agitation or the jigglin' of the cars I dropped'em, and a perfect Arabian Night's entertainer to Tommy, whoworshipped her, when I hearn a exclamation from Tommy, and the cardoor shet, and I looked round and see a young man and woman advancin'down the isle. They wuz a bridal couple, that anybody could see. Theblessed fact could be seen in their hull personality--dress, demeanor, shinin' new satchels and everything, but I didn't recognize 'em tillTommy sez: "Oh, grandma, there is Phila Henzy and the man she married!" Could it be? Yes it wuz Phila Ann Henzy, Philemon Henzy's oldest girl, named for her pa and ma, I knew she wuz married in Loontown the weekbefore. I'd hearn on't, but had never seen the groom, but knew he wuza young chap she had met to the Buffalo Exposition, and who hadcourted her more or less ever sence. They seemed real glad to see me, though their manners and smiles and hull demeanors seemed kinder new, somehow, like their clothes. They had hearn from friends in Jonesvillethat I wuz on my way to California, and they'd been lookin' for me. Sez the groom, with a fond look on her: "I am so glad we found you, for Baby would have been so disappointedif we hadn't met you. " Baby! Phila Ann wuz six feet high if she wuz a inch, but good lookin'in a big sized way. And he wuz barely five feet, and scrawny at that;but a good amiable lookin' young man. But I didn't approve of hiscallin' her Baby when she could have carried him easy on one arm andnot felt it. The Henzys are all big sized, and Ann, her ma, couldalways clean her upper buttery shelves without gittin' up in a chair, reach right up from the floor. But he probable had noble qualities if he wuz spindlin' lookin', orshe couldn't adore him as she did. Phila Ann jest worshipped him Icould see, and he her, visey versey. Sez she, with a tender look downonto him: "Yes, I've been tellin' pa how I did hope we should meet you. " Pa! There wuz sunthin' else I didn't approve of; callin' him pa, whenthe fact that they wuz on their bridal tower wuz stomped on 'em bothjest as plain as I ever stomped a pat of butter with clover leaves. But I didn't spoze I could do anything to help or hender, for Irealized they wuz both in a state of delirium or trance. But Imeditated further as I looked on, it wouldn't probable last no greatlength of time. The honeymoon would be clouded over anon or beforethat. The clouds would clear away agin, no doubt, and the sun of Loveshine out permanent if their affection for each other wuz cast-ironand sincere. But the light of this magic moon I knew would nevershine on 'em agin. The light of that moon makes things look dretfulqueer and casts strange shadders onto things and folks laugh at it butno other light is so heavenly bright while it lasts. I think so and soduz Josiah. But to resoom forwards. The groom went somewhere to send a telegramand Phila sot down by me for a spell; their seat wuz further off butshe wanted to talk with me. She wuz real happy and confided in me, andremarked "What a lovely state matrimony is. " And I sez, "Yes indeed! it is, but you hain't got fur enough along inmarriage gography to bound the state on all sides as you will in thefuture. " But she smiled blissful and her eyes looked fur off in rapped delight(the light of that moon shin' full on her) as she said: "What bliss it is for me to know that I have got sunthin' to leanon. " And I thought that it would be sad day for him if she leaned her hullheft, but didn't say so, not knowin' how it would be took. I inquired all about the neighbors in Jonesville and Zoar andLoontown, and sez I, "I spoze Elder White is still doin' all he canfor that meetin' house of hisen in Loontown, and I inquired particularabout him, for Ernest White is a young man I set store by. He comefrom his home in Boston to visit his uncle, the banker, in EastLoontown. He wuz right from the German university and college andpreachin' school, and he wuz so rich he might have sot down andtwiddled his thumbs for the rest of his days. But he had a passion forwork--a passion of pity for poor tempted humanity. He wanted to reachdown and try to lift up the strugglin' 'submerged tenth. ' He wuz astudent and disciple of Ruskin, and felt that he must carry a messageof helpfulness and beauty into starved lives. And, best of all, he wuza follower of Jesus, who went about doin' good. When his rich familyfound that he would be a clergyman they wanted to git him a big citychurch, and he might have had twenty, for he wuz smart as a whip, handsome, rich, and jest run after in society. But no; he said therewuz plenty to take those rich fat places; he would work amongst thepoor, them who needed him. " East Loontown is a factory village, and the little chapel was standin'empty for want of funds, but twenty saloons wuz booming, full of theoperatives, who spent all of their spare time and most of their moneythere. So Ernest White stayed right there and preached, at first toempty seats and a few old wimmen, but as they got to know him, thebest young men and young wimmen went, and he filled their hearts withaspiration and hope and beauty and determination to help the world. Not being contented with what he wuz doing he spent half his time withthe factory hands, who wuz driven to work by Want, and harried by themighty foe, Intemperance. A saloon on every corner and block, our twinAmerican idols, Intemperance and Greed, taking every cent of moneyfrom the poor worshippers, to pour into the greedy pockets of thesaloon-keepers, brewers, whiskey men and the Government, and all whofatten on the corpse of manhood. Well, he jest threw himself into the work of helping those poor souls, and helping them as he did in sickness and health they got to likinghim, so that they wuz willing to go and hear him preach, which was onehard blow to the Demon. The next thing he got all the ministers hecould to unite in a Church Union to fight the Liquor Power, andundertaking it in the right way, at the ballot-box, they got it prettywell subdued, and as sane minds begun to reign in healthier bodies, better times come. Elder White not only preached every Sunday, but kep' his church openevery evening of the week, and his boys and girls met there forhealthful and innocent amusements. He got a good library, all sorts ofgood games, music; and had short, interesting lectures andentertainments and his Church of Love rivalled the Idol Temples anddrew away its idol worshippers one by one, and besides the ministers, many prominent business men helped him; my son, Thomas J. , is forwardin helpin' it along. And they say that besides all the good they'redoing, they have good times too, and enjoy themselves first-rateevenings. They don't stay out late--that's another thing Elder Whiteis trying to inculcate into their minds--right living in the way ofhealth as well as morals. Every little while he and somebody else whois fitted for it gives short talks on subjects that will help the boysand girls along in Temperance and all good things. The young folksjest worship him, so they say, and I wuz glad to hear right from him. Phila is a worker in his meetin' house, and a active member, and so isher pa and ma, and she said that there wuz no tellin' how much good hehad done. "When he come there, " sez she, "there wuz twenty saloons goin' fullblast in a village of two thousand inhabitants and the mill operativeswuz spendin' most all they earnt there, leavin' their families tosuffer and half starve; but when Elder White opened his Church of Loveweek day evenin's as well as Sunday, you have no idee what a changethere is. There isn't a saloon in the place. He has made his church sopleasant for the young folks that he has drawn away crowds that usedto fill the saloons. " "Yes, " sez I, "Thomas J. Is dretful interested in it; he has gin threelectures there. " "Yes, most all the best citizens have joined the Help Union tofight against the Whiskey Power, though, " sez Phila, "there is oneor two ministers who are afraid of contaminating their religion bypolitics. They had ruther stand up in their pulpits and preach toa few wimmen about the old Jews and the patience of Job than takeholt and do a man's work in a man's way--the only practical way, grapple with the monster Evil at its lair, where it breeds andfattens--the ballot-box. " "Yes, " sez I, "a good many ministers think that they can't descendinto the filthy pool of politics. But it hain't reasonable, for howare you a goin' to clean out a filthy place if them that want it cleanstand on the bank and hold their noses with one hand, and jester withthe other, and quote scripter? And them that don't want it clean arethrowin' slime and dirt into it all the time, heapin' up the loathsomefilth. Somebody has got to take holt and work as well as pray, ifthese plague spots and misery breeders are ever purified. " "Well, Elder White is doin' all he can, " sez Phila. "He went right tothe polls 'lection day and worked all day; for the Whiskey Power wuzall riz up and watchin' and workin' for its life, as you may say, bound to draw back into its clutches some of the men that Elder White, with the Lord's help, had saved. They exerted all their influence, liquor run free all day and all the night before, tryin' to brutalizeand craze the men into votin' as the Liquor Power dictated. But ElderWhite knew what they wuz about, and he and all the earnest helpers hecould muster used all their power and influence, and the election wuza triumph for the Right. East Loontown went no-license, and not asaloon curses its streets to-day. North Loontown, where the ministerfelt that he wuz too good to touch the political pole, went license, and five more filthy pools wuz opened there for his flock to fallinto, to breed vile influences that will overpower all the goodinfluence he can possibly bring to bear on the souls committed to hiscare. " "But, " sez I, "he is writin' his book, 'Commentaries on Ancient Sins, 'so he won't sense it so much. He's jest carried away with his work. " Sez Phila, "He had better be actin' out a commentary on modern sins. What business has he to be rakin' over the old ashes of Sodom andGomorrah for bones of antediluvian sinners, and leave his livin'flock to be burnt and choked by the fire and flames of the presentvolcano of crime, the Liquor System, that belches forth all thetime. " "Well, he wuz made so, " sez I. "Well, he had better git down out of the pulpit, " sez Phila, "and letsome one git up there who can see a sinner right under his nose, andtry to drag him out of danger and ruin, and not have to look over adozen centuries to find him. " "Well, I am thankful for Ernest White, and I have felt that he andWaitstill Webb wuz jest made for each other. He thinks his eyes of herI know. When she went and nursed the factory hands when the typhoidfever broke out he said 'she wuz like a angel of Mercy. '" "They said he looked like a angel of Wrath 'lection day, " sez Phila. "You know how fair his face is, and how his clear gray eyes seem tolook right through you, and through shams and shames of every kind. Well, that day they said his face fairly shone and he did the work often men. " "That is because his heart is pure, " sez I, "like that Mr. Gallyhed Iheard Thomas J. Read about; you know it sez: "'His strength is as the strength of ten Because his heart is pure. ' "And oh!" sez I agin, "how I would love to see him and Waitstill Webbmarried, and happy. " "So would I, " sez Phila. "Oh, it is such a beautiful state, matrimonyis. " "And he needs a wife, " sez I. "You know he wouldn't stay with hisuncle but said he must live with his people who needed him, so heboards there at the Widder Pooler's. " "Yes, " sez Phila, "and though she worships him, she had rather any dayplay the part of Mary than of Martha--she had rather be sittin' at hisfeet and learnin' of him--than cookin' good nourishin' food andmakin' a clean, sweet home for him. But he don't complain. " "What a companion Waitstill would be for him?" I sez agin. "Yes, " sez Phila, "but I don't believe she will ever marry any one, she looks so sad. " "It seems jest if they wuz made for each other, " sez I, "and I know heworships the ground she walks on. But I don't know as she will evermarry any one after what she has went through, " and I sithed. "She would marry, " sez Phila warmly, "if she knew what a lovely, lovely state it wuz. " How strange it is that some folks are as soft as putty on somesubjects and real cute on others. Phila knew enough on any othersubject only jest marriage. But I spozed that her brain would hardenup on this subject when she got more familiar with it--they generallydo. And the light of that moon I spoke on liquefies common sense and astate, putty soft, ensues; but cold weather hardens putty, and I knewthat she would git over it. But even as I methought, Phila sez, "Imust go to my seat, pa will be lookin' for me. " I see Miss Meechimsmotherin' a smile on her lace-edged handkerchief, and Dorothy's eyeskinder laughin' at the idee of a bride callin' her husband "pa. " But the groom returned at jest that minute, and I introduced 'em bothto Miss Meechim and Dorothy, and we had quite a good little visit. Butanon, the groom mentioned incidentally that they wuz a goin' to livein Salt Lake City. "Why!" sez I in horrow, "you hain't a goin' to jine the Mormons areyou?" And as I said that I see Miss Meechim kinder git Dorothy behind her, as if to protect her from what might be. But I knew there wuzn't nodanger from the groom's flirtin' with any other female or tryin' togit 'em sealed to him, for quite a spell I knew that he felt himselfas much alone with Baby as if them two wuz on a oasis in the middle ofthe desert of Sarah. I knew that it would be some months before hewaked up to the fact of there bein' another woman in the world. Andoh, how Phila scoffed at the idee of pa jinin' the Mormons. They hadbought part of a store of a Gentile and wuz goin' to be pardners withhim and kinder grow up with the country. I felt that hey wuz a likelycouple and would do well, but rememberin' Dorothy's and Miss Meechim'ssmiles I reached up and stiddied myself on that apron-string of Duty, and took Phila out one side and advised her not to call her bridegroompa. Sez I, "You hain't but jest married and it don't look well. " And she said that "Her ma always called her father pa. " "Well, " sez I, "if you'll take the advice of a old Jonesvillian andwell-wisher, you'll wait till you're a few years older before you callhim pa. " And she sez, lookin' admirin'ly at him, "I spoze I might call himpapa. " Well, you can't put sense into a certain bump in anybody's head if itwuzn't made there in the first place--there are holler places in headsthat you can't fill up, do your best. But oh! how her devoted love tohim put me in mind of myself, and how his small-sized devotion toher--how it reminded me of him who wuz far away--and oh, why did I nothear from him! my heart sunk nearly into my shues as I foreboded aboutit. It seemed as if everything brung him up before me, the provisionswe had on the dining car wuz good and plenty of 'em, and how they mademe think of him, who wuz a good provider. The long, long days andnights of travel, the jar and motion of the cars made me think of himwho often wuz restless and oneasy. And even the sand of the desertbetween Cheyenne and Denver, even that sand brought me fondremembrances of one who wuz sandy complected when in his prime. Andoh! when did I not think of him? Christmas had gone by, but how couldwe celebrate it without a home to set up a Christmas tree, or set outa table with good Jonesville vittles. How I thought on him who made aholiday in my heart by his presence, and always helped me put theleaves in the extension table. Tommy wanted to hang up his little stockin', and did, hangin' it outlike a little red signal of distress over the side of his top shelf, and we filled it with everything good we could git hold on. Dorothy put in a little silver watch she had bought on her travels, not bigger than a warnut, and Miss Meechim put in some of the toys shehad bought for children of her acquaintance. I got a good littlepicture book for him in Chicago, and a set of Authors, and Aronettegin him two little linen handkerchiefs, hemstitched by herself, andhis name, "Tommy, " worked in the corners. He wuz real tickled with 'emall. I told Miss Meechim that I had hoped to spend Christmas in SaltLake City. Knowin' that it wuz a warm climate, I thought I could havea Christmas tree out doors; I thought I could take one of them bigpine trees I had read on, and invite Brigham Young's wives, the hullon 'em, to my party, bein' out doors I thought there would be room for'em all, poor creeters! But Miss Meechim is very cautious, and she said that she wuz afraidthat such a party given by folks in my high position might have atendency to encourage polygamy. And I said, "I would rather give a dollar bill than do that, and mebbeI had better give it up, for we shan't git there in time, anyway. " And so I did, and spent the Christmas holidays on the cars, and triedto keep my heart and mind in a Christmas mood, but don't spoze I did, so many fond recollections and sad forebodin's hanted me as the carsswep' us on, on through the valley of the Platte river on to Denver. Miss Meechim, who is a power on dates, said that Denver wuz fivethousand two hundred feet above the sea. And Tommy wonnered, wonnered who measured it, and if they did it witha yard stick as his ma measured cloth, and then he wonnered if his mamissed her little boy, and then he laid up aginst me and kinder crieda little, evanescent grief soon soothed. We stayed in Denver two days, sallyin' out to different points ofinterest about it, and here I see irrigation carried on, water carriedinto the channels around the crops and trees some as I've dug littleholes round my house-plants to hold water; only of course Denver wuzcarryin' it on, on a bigger scale. It is a handsome city with thewater of the Platte river brung in and running along in little streamsby the curbstones. We rode out to Idaho Springs on a narrer railroadbut easy goin', through Clear Creek Canon. I liked the looks of theSprings first-rate (they made me think of Josiah). All the way we see Chinamen workin' hard and patient, as is theirwont, and their long frocks they had on made me think of him I mournedfor, and their hair hangin' in long braids down their back. So would_his_ hair look if he had any, and let it grow. We had to go a little out of our straight way to visit Salt Lake Citybut felt that it paid. CHAPTER IV Salt Lake lays in a rich valley at the foot of a range of snow-cappedmountains that tower up 'round it, seemin' to the saints, I spoze, asif they wuz heavenly ramparts to protect 'em from evil; and lookin' tothem that despise the saints' ways and customs, as if the very earthitself was liftin' up its high hands in horrow at their deeds. But tome, hanted as I wuz by a memory, the mountains looked some like oldmen with white hair; as his would be when he got older if he wuzn'tbald. I knew that I ort not to think on it, but it would come onbid. It is a beautiful city with electric lights, electric railways, broadstreets lined with lofty trees, and little rivulets of pure coldsnow-water runnin' along the side of 'em. The houses are clean andcomfortable looking, with well-kep' lawns and gardens about 'em andflowering shrubs. The temple is a magnificent building; it towers upto heaven, as if it wuz jest as sure of bein' right as our MethodistEpiscopal steeple at Jonesville. Though we know that the M. E. Steeple, though smaller in size, is pintin' the right way and will befound out so on that day that tries souls and steeples and everythingelse. The old Bee Hive (where the swarm of Mormons first hived and made gallor honey--or mebby both)--is also an interestin' sight to meditate on. It is shaped a good deal like one of them round straw bee hives yousee in old Sabbath School books. The bride and groom went to their ownhome to live, on whom we called, or Tommy and I did, and left 'em wellsituated and happy; and I told him, sez I: "If you 'tend strict to theeighth commandment, you'll git along first rate. " And he said that he felt he could rise to any height of goodness withBaby's help. And she scoffed at the idee of pa ever payin' anyattention to any other woman but her, when he worshipped her so. Well, so other men have felt and got led off, but I won't forebode. But I left 'em happy in their own cozy home, which I wuz glad to thinkI could describe to Phileman and Ann if I ever see that blessed haven, Jonesville, agin. We went out to visit the Mineral Springs. It only took us about tenminutes on the train, and it only took us about half an hour to go toGarfield Beach. It is the only sand beach on Salt Lake, and some sayit is the finest beach in the world, and they say that the sunsetsviewed from this spot are so heavenly bright in their glowin' colorsthat no pen or tongue can describe 'em. The blue-green waves wuzdancin' as we stood on the shore, and we wuz told that if we fell in, the water would hold us up, but didn't try it, bein' in sunthin' of ahurry. At Miss Meechim's strong request we went on a pleasant trip to YorkCity through the valley of the River of Jordan. How good that namesounded to me! How much like scripter! But, alas! it made me think ofone who had so often sung with me on the way home from evenin'meetin', as the full moon gilded the top of the democrat, and thesurroundin' landscape: "By Jordan's stormy banks we stand And cast a wistful eye On Canaan's fair and happy land, Where my possessions lie. " Oh, human love and longing, how strong thou art! I knowed that himmeant the things of the sperit, but my human heart translated it, andI sithed and felt that the Jordan my soul wuz passin' through wuzindeed a hard pathway, and I couldn't help castin' a wishful eye onJonesville's fair and happy land, where my earthly possession, myJosiah, lay. But to resoom. We had hearn that Polygamy wuz still practised there, and we had hearn that it wuzn't. But every doubt on that subject wuzlaid to rest by an invitation we all had to go and visit a Mormonfamily livin' not fur off, and Miss Meechim and I went, she notwantin' Dorothy to hear a word on the subject. She said with reason, that after all her anxiety and labors to keep her from marryin' oneman, what would be her feelin's to have her visit a man who had boldlywedded 'leven wives and might want a even dozen! I could see it to once, so didn't urge the matter, but left Tommy withher and Aronette. As nigh as I could make out, the Mormons had feltthat Miss Meechim and I wuz high in authority in Gentile climes, oneon us had that air of nobility and command that is always associatedwith high authority, and they felt that one on us could do their causemuch good if they could impress us favorable with the custom, so theyput their best twenty-four feet forward and did their level best toshow off their doctrine in flyin' colors. But they didn't do any goodto "one on us, " nor to Miss Meechim, either; she's sound in doctrine, though kinder weak and disagreeable in spots. Well, we found that this family lived in splendid style, and thehusband and all his pardners acted happy whether they wuz or not. AndI d'no how or why it wuz, but when we all sot down in their large coolparlor, Miss Meechim and I in our luxurious easy chairs, and our hostin one opposite with his wife occupyin' 'leven chairs at his sides, afeelin' of pity swep' over me--pity for that man. Yes, as I looked at that one lonely man, small boneded at that, andthen looked at them 'leven portly wimmen that called that man "ourhusband, " I pitied him like a dog. I had never thought of pityin'Mormon men before, but had poured out all my pity and sympathy ontothe female Mormons. But havin' a mind like a oxes for strength, Ibegun to see matters in a new light, and I begun to spozen to myself, even whilst I sot there with my tongue keepin' up a light dialogue onthe weather, the country, etc. , with the man and his wife ('leven on'em). I spozed what if they should all git mad at him at one time howwuz he goin' to bear their 'leven rages flashin' from twenty-two eyes, snortin' from 'leven upturned noses, fallin' from 'leven angry voices, and the angry jesters from twenty-two scornful hands. Spozein' theyall got to weepin' on his shoulder at one time how could one shoulderblade stand it under the united weight of 'leven full-sized females, most two ton of 'em, amidst more'n forty-four nervous sobs, for theywould naterally gin more'n two apiece. In sickness now, if they wantedto soothe his achin' brow, and of course they would all want to, andhave the right to. But how could twenty-two hands rest on that onesmall fore-top? Sixty-six rubs at the least figger, for if theystroked his forehead at all they would want to stroke it three timesapiece, poor creeter! would not delerium ensue instead of sooth? Andspozein' they all took it into their heads to hang on his arm withboth arms fondly whilst out walkin' by moonlight, how could twenty-twoarms be accommodated by two small scrawny elbows? It couldn't be done. And as I mused on't I spoke right out onbeknownto me, and sez I: "The Lord never meant it to be so; it hain't reasonable; it's aginstcommon sense. " And the hull twelve sez, "What didn't the Lord mean? What wuz aginstcommon sense?" And bein' ketched at it, I sez, "The Mormon doctrine;" sez I, "to saynothin' on moral and spiritual grounds, and state rights, it's againstreason and good sense. " I felt mortified to think I had spoke out loud, but had to stand myground after I had said it. But they all said that the Mormon doctrine wuz the true belief, thatit wuz writ in heaven, then it wuz engraved on plates, and dug up byJoe Smith, a Latter Day Saint. Sez I, "If anybody trys to prove sunthin' they want to, they can mostalways dig up sunthin' to prove it. You say a man dug this plate up;what if some woman should go to diggin' and find a plate provin' thatone woman ort to have 'leven husbands?" "Oh, no!" sez the man in deep scorn, "no such plate could be found!" The wimmen all looked as if they would kinder like to see such dishes, but they all sez faintly, "We don't spoze that it could be found. " "But, " I sez, "you don't know how many plates there are in the ground, nor who'll dig 'em up. " "Oh, that idee is preposterous!" sez the man, as visions of dividin'one woman's heart into eleven parts and reignin' over that littlemossel riz up before him. "Men never would agree to that; there wouldbe mutiny, internal bloodshed and sizm. " "Well, " sez I, "mebby there is more or less internal heart bleedin'goin' on in the wimmen's hearts that have to divide a man's love andcare a dozen times. " Sez I, "A hull man's hull affections are onstiddyand wobblin' and oncertain enough without dividin' it up so manytimes. " Them wimmen wuz touched. I see a answerin' gleam of understandin' comeinto about twenty-one eyes as I spoke; one on 'em stood firm andlooked hauty and cast iron, but I mistrusted it wuz a glass eye, butdon't know, it might have been principle. And even on the man's small-sized countenance my words had seemed tomake a impression. But yet he didn't want to give up in a minute; hespoke of how the Mormons had flourished since they come to Utah, howthey had turned the desert into a garden, and he felt that the Lordmust look on 'em favorable or they wouldn't be so prosperous. "Yes, " sez I, not wantin' to lie, "your country is beautiful, it is ina flourishing state, and shows the good results of systematic labor, industry and ambition; you have made the desert bloom like the rosy, many of your ways and customs might be follered with profit by oldercommunities, and more orthodox accordin' to my idees. But I don't knowas your flourishin' in worldly affairs is any sign of God's favor, "and I mentioned the scripter concernin' who it wuz that flourishedlike the green bayberry tree. So bein' driv out of that argument, hesez, forgittin' his own eleven proofs aginst his story bein' true: "Polygamy is done away with anyway; the United States have abolishedit in Utah. " And I sez: "Well, I should be glad to think that wuz so, for onehusband and one wife is as much as the Lord in his mercy ort to askone human creeter to tend to and put up with. Not but what marriage isa beautiful institution and full of happiness if Love props it up andgilds it with its blessed ray. But one is enough, " sez I firmly, "andenough is as good as a feast. " Miss Meechim sot silently by durin' this eloquent discussion--what shefelt, she that abhorred the institution of marriage anyway--what shefelt to look on and see folks so much married as these wuz, willforever remain a secret, but her looks wuz queer, very, and her nosefairly sought the heavens, it wuz held so high. A few of the wivesbrought in some refreshments to refresh us, and a few more waited onus and the small husband of their eleven hearts, and almostimmegiately we tore ourselves away, takin' in ourn as we left, thehand of the husband and the eleven right hands of the wife. That evenin' I wuz told I wuz wanted in the parlor, and as I enteredquite a good lookin' Mormon man got up and advanced and broke out toonce askin' my help. He said he'd read in the paper that I wuz thereto that tarven, and knowin' I stood so high with the public he hadventered to ask my help. He had political yearnin's and wanted to setin the Senate, but as I stood firm as iron again that idee hislinement grew almost frenzied, and sez he: "Do help me, do use your influence with your President. He's afraidof race suicide; tell him I'm the father of forty-seven children--willnot that touch his heart?" "Not a mite!" sez I, "his heart is as true as steel to his one wifeand six children. It is a good manly heart that can't be led off byany such brazen statements. " His linement looked lurid and half demented as he sez, "Mebby somehigh church dignitaries would help me. Or no, " sez he, "go to the headof it all, go to the Liquor Power--that's the place to go to, thatrules Church and State, that makes the laws. Oh, do go to the LiquorPower, and git it to let me set. I'll pay their usual price for makin'personal laws in a man's favor. " The cold glare in my gray eye froze the words on his lip. "You ask meto go to the Liquor Power for help! Do you know who you're speakin'to?" "Yes, " sez he feebly, "I'm speakin' to Josiah Allen's wife, and I wantto set. " His axent wuz heartbroken and I fancied that there wuz a little toneof repentance in it. Could I influence him for the right? Could Ifrighten him into the right path? I felt I must try, and I sez in alow, deep voice: "I'll help you to set if you'll set where I want you to. " "Oh, tell me! tell me, " sez he, "where you want me to set. " "Not in the high halls where justice is administered, not up therewith the pictures of your numerous wives on your heart to make lawscondemnin' a man who has only one extra wife to prison for twentyyears, which same law would condemn you to prison for 'most a century. That wouldn't be reasonable. Presidents and senators are sot up therein Washington D. C. As examplers for the young to foller and stimulate'em to go and do likewise. Such a example as yourn would stimulate 'emtoo much in matrimonial directions and land 'em in prison. " He muttered sunthin' about lots of public men havin' other wives insecret. "In secret?" sez I. "Well, mebby so, but it has to be in secret, hidaway, wropped in disgrace, and if the law discovers it they arepunished. That's a very different thing from makin' such a liferespectable, coverin' 'em under the mantilly of the law, embroideredtoo with public honors. " He turned away despairin'ly and murmured mekanically the oldheart-broken wail, "I want to set. " And I sez reasonably, "There is no objection to your settin' down, andif I had my way you would set right by them who have done only half ora quarter what you have and in the place the laws have made for themand you. " He turned quick as a wink, "Then you won't help me?" "Yes, " sez I, "I'll help all I can to put you right in with the othersthat have done jest what you have--openly set our laws at defiance. But if I know myself I won't help a tiger cat to hold a canary bird ora wolf to guard a sheep pen. I won't help a felon up on the seat ofjustice to make laws for innocent men. " "Innocent men!" And agin he sez, "Ha! ha!" And agin I didn't care what he said. And I got up and sez, "You may aswell leave the presence. " And as he turned I sez in conclusion, thinkin' mebby I'd been too hash, "I dare say you have intellect andmay be a good man so fur as I know only in this one iniquity and opendefiance of our laws, and I advise you to turn right round in yourtracks and git ready to set down on high, for you'll find it a muchworse thing to prance round through all eternity without settin' thanit is to not set here. " He jest marched out of the door and didn't say good bye or good day oranything. But I didn't care. I knowed the minute his card wuz handedto me jest how many wives he had and how he wuz doin' all he could touphold what he called his religion, but I did hope I'd done him somegood but felt dubersome about it. But knowin' I'd clung to Duty'sapron strings I felt like leavin' the event. And when Miss Meechimcome in I wuz settin' calm and serene in a big chair windin' someclouded blue and white yarn, Aronette holdin' the skein. I'd brungalong a lot of woollen yarn to knit Josiah some socks on the way, tomake me feel more homelike. And the next day we proceeded on to California. CHAPTER V Miss Meechim and Dorothy looked brighter and happier as everyrevolution of the wheels brought us nearer their old home, and theytalked about Robert Strong and other old friends I never see. "Be it ever so humbly, There is no place like hum. " My heart sung them words and carried two parts, one sulferino and onebear tone. The high part caused by my lofty emotions and sweetrecollections of home, that hallowed spot; the minor chords caused byfeelin's I have so often recapitulated. Tommy, as the day wore on, went to sleep, and I covered him tenderly on the seat with my littleshoulder shawl, and sot there alone; alone, as the cars bore usonward, sometimes through broad green fields of alfalfa, anon over abridge half a mile long, from whence you could look down and see theflowing stream beneath like a little skein of silver yarn glisteningin the sun fur below, agin forests and valleys and farms andhomesteads, and anon in an opening through a valley, high bluffs, beautifully colored, could be seen towering up over blue waters, up, up as if they wuz bent on touching the fleecy clouds overhead. Andthen a green sheltered valley, and then a high range of mountains seenfur off as if overlookin' things to see that all wuz well, anon a bigcity, then a village, then the green country agin, and so the picturespassed before me as I sot there. I had put on a pair of new cuffs and a collar, made for me andhemstitched by Waitstill Webb, and gin to me by her, though I wantedto pay her. Sweet little creeter! how good she wuz to me and toeverybody, and I thought of her sad history, and hoped that brighterdays wuz ahead on her. I d'no as I've told the reader much about herhistory, and mebby I might as well whilst we are rushin' on so fast, and Tommy is asleep. Alan Thorne, the young man she wuz engaged to, wuz brung up by a unclewho had a family of his own to love and tend to, but he did his dutyby Alan, gin him a good education and a comfortable, if notaffectionate, home in his family. But it wuz a big family all bound upin each other, and Alan had seemed like one who looks on through awinder at the banquet of Life and Love, kinder hungry and lonesometill he met Waitstill Webb. Then their two hearts and souls rushedtogether like two streams of water down an inclined plane. Theyliterally seemed to be two bodies with one heart, one soul, onedesire, one aspiration. He had always been industrious, honest andhard workin'. Now he had sunthin' to work for; and for the three yearsafter he met Waitstill he worked like a giant. He wuz earning a homefor his wife, his idol; how happy he wuz in his efforts, his work, andhow happy she wuz to see it, and to work herself in her quiet way forthe future. He had bought a home about a mile out of the city, where he wasemployed, and had got it all payed for. It wuz a beautiful littlecottage with a few acres of land round it, and he had got his gardenall laid out and a orchard of fruit trees of all kinds, and trees andflowering shrubs and vines around the pretty cottage. There wuz alittle pasture where he wuz to keep his cow and a horse, that shecould take him with to his work mornings and drive round where shewanted to, and there wuz a meadow lot with a little rivulet runningthrough it, and they had already planned a rustic bridge over thedancing stream, and a trout pond, and she had set out on its borderssome water lilies, pink and white, and Showy Ladies and other wildflowers, and she jest doted on her posy garden and strawberry beds, and they'd bought two or three hives of bees in pretty boxes and tookthem out there; they had rented the place to a old couple till theywanted it themselves. And every holiday and Sunday they walked out totheir own place, and the sun did not shine any brighter on theirlittle home than the sun of hope and happiness did in their hearts asthey pictured their life there in that cozy nest. And Alan Thorne, after he loved Waitstill, not only tried to winoutward success for her sake; he tried to weed out all the weaknessesof his nater, to make himself more worthy of her. He said to himselfwhen he would go to see her, he would "robe his soul in holiestpurpose as for God himself. " His pa had at one time in his life drankconsiderable, but he wuz not a drunkard, and he wuz a good bizness manwhen the fever carried him off, and his young wife out of the worldthe same year. Well, Alan wuz jest as industrious as he could be, andwith his happy future to look forward to and Waitstill's love andbeloved presence to prop up his manhood, everything promised a fairand happy life for them both; till, like a thunder-cloud out of aclear sky come that deafening report from Spanish brutality that blewup the _Maine_ and this nation's peace and tranquility. Dretful deed!Awful calamity! that sent three hundred of our brave seamen onpreparedto meet their God--without a second's warning. Awful deed that criedto heaven for pity! But did it bring back these brave fellows sleepingin Havana harbor to their mothers, wives and sweethearts, to havethousands more added to the list of the slain? "Remember the _Maine_!" How these words echoed from pulpit and Senateand palace and hovel; how they wuz sung in verse, printed in poems, printed in flaming lines of electric light everywhere! From city tocountry, you saw and heard these words, "Remember the _Maine_!" I wondered then and I wonder now if the spirit of revenge that swep'through our nation at that time wuz the spirit of the Master. I d'no nor Josiah don't, whether it wuz right and best to influencethe souls of the young till they burnt at white heat with the spiritthat our Lord said his disciples must avoid, for said he: "Vengeanceis mine, saith the Lord. " Well, it is a deep question, deeper than I've got a line to measure;and Josiah's line and mine both tied together don't begin to touch thebottom on't, for we've tried it time and agin. We've argyed aginsteach other about it, and jined on and hitched our arguments together, and they didn't touch bottom then, nor begin to. As Mrs. Browning said(a woman I set store by, and always did, I've hearn Thomas J. Readabout her so much): "A country's a thing men should die for at need. " Yes, to die for, if its safety is imperilled, that I believe andJosiah duz, but I have eppisoded about it a sight, I've had to. Imethought how this nation wuz stirred to its deepest depths; how itseethed and boiled with indignation and wrath because three hundred ofits sons wuz killed by ignorant and vicious means; how it breathed outvengeance on the cause that slew them; how it called To Arms! To Arms!Remember the _Maine_! But how cool and demute it stood, or ruther sot, and see every year sixty thousand of its best sons slain by thesaloon, ten-fold more cruel deaths, too, since the soul and mind wuzslain before their bodies went. No cry for vengeance as the longprocession of the dead wheeled by the doors of the law-makers of theland; no cry: "To arms! to arms! Remember the Saloon. " And moremysterious still, I eppisoded to myself, it would have looked to seethe Government rig out and sell to the Spaniards a million more bombsand underground mines to blow up the rest of our ships and killthousands more of our young men. Wouldn't it have looked dog queer tothe other nations of the world to have seen it done? But there they sot, our law-makers, and if they lifted their eyes atall to witness the long procession of the dead drift by, sixtythousand corpses yearly slain by the Saloon, if they lifted their eyesat all to look at the ghastly procession, they dropped 'em agin quickas they could so's not to delay their work of signin' licenses, makin'new laws, fixin' over old ones, and writin' permits to the murderersto go on with their butchery. Queer sight! queer in the sight of othernations, in the sight of men and angels, and of me and Josiah. Well, to stop eppisodin' and resoom backwards for a spell. Alan Thornehearn that cry: "To arms! To arms!" And his very soul listened. Hisgrandfathers on both sides wuz fighting men; at school and collegehe'd been trained in a soldier regiment, and had been steeped full ofwarlike idees, and they all waked up at his cry for vengeance. He hadjust got to go; it wuz to be. Heaven and Waitstill couldn't help it;he had to go; he went. Well, Waitstill read his letters as well as she could through herblindin' tears; letters at first full of love--the very passion oflove and tenderness for his sweetheart, and deathless patriotism andlove for his country. But bime-by the letters changed a little in their tones--they wuzn'tso full of love for his country. "The country, " so he writ, "wuzshamefully neglecting its sons, neglecting their comfort. " He writthey wuz herded together in quarters not fit for a dog, withinsufficient food; putrid, dretful food, that no dog would or couldeat. No care taken of their health--and as for the health of theirsouls, no matter where they wuz, if half starved or half clad, theCanteen was always present with 'em; if they could git nothin' elsefor their comfort, they could always git the cup that the Bible sez:"Cursed is he that puts it to his neighbor's lips. " Doubly cursednow--poisoned with adulteration, makin' it a still more deadly pizen. Well, sickened with loathsome food he could not eat, half starved, thedeadly typhoid hovering over the wretched soldier, is it any wonderthat as the tempter held the glass to his lips (the tempter being theGovernment he wuz fightin' for) the tempted yielded and drank? The letters Waitstill got grew shorter and cooler, as the tempter ledAlan deeper and deeper into his castle of Ruin where the demon setsand gloats over its victims. When the Canteen had done its work on thecrazed brain and imbruted body, other sins and evils our Governmenthad furnished and licensed, stood ready to draw him still furtheralong the down-grade whose end is death. Finally the letters stopped, and then Waitstill, whose heart wuzbroke, jined the noble army of nurses and went forward to the front, always hunting for the one beloved, and, as she feared, lost to her. And she found him. The very day that Alan Thorne, in a drunken brawl, killed Arvilly's husband with a bullet meant for another drunkenyouth, these wimmen met. A rough lookin' soldier knelt down by thedead man, a weepin' woman fell faintin' on his still, dead heart; thissoldier ('twas Arville) wuz sick in bed for a week, Waitstill tendin'him, or her I might as well say, for Arville owned to her in herweakness that she wuz a woman; yes, Waitstill tended her faithfully, white and demute with agony, but kep' up with the hope that theGovernment that had ruined her lover would be lenient towards thecrime it had caused. For she reasoned it out in a woman's way. Shetold Arvilly "that Alan would never have drank had not the Governmentput the cup to his lips, and of course the Government could notconsistently condemn what it had caused to be. " She reasoned it outfrom what she had learnt of justice and right in the Bible. But Arvilly told her--for as quick as she got enough strength she wuzthe same old Arvilly agin, only ten times more bent on fightin' aginstthe Drink Demon that murdered her husband. Sez Arvilly: "You don'ttake into consideration the Tariff and Saloon arguments of apologizin'Church and State, the tax money raised from dead men, and ruinedlives and broken hearts to support poor-houses and jails and police totake care of their victims. " No; Waitstill reasoned from jest plainBible, but of course she found out her mistake. Arvilly said: "You'llfind the nation that opens its sessions with prayer, and engraves onits money, 'In God We Trust, ' don't believe in such things. You'llfind their prayers are to the liquor dealers; their God is the hugeidol of Expediency. " Alan Thorne wuz hung for the murder, guilty, so the earthly courtsaid. But who wuz sot down guilty in God's great book of Justice thatday? Arvilly believes that over Alan Thorne's name wuz printed: "Alan Thorne, foolish boy, tempted and ondone by the country he wastrying to save. " And then this sentence in fiery flame: "The United States of America, guilty of murder in the first degree. " Dretful murder, to take the life of the one that loved it and wuztryin' to save it. Well, Arvilly's last thing to love wuz taken from her cruelly, andwhen she got strong enough she sot off for Jonesville in her soldierclothes, for she thought she would wear 'em till she got away, but shewuz brung back as a deserter and Waitstill stood by her durin' hertrial, and after Alan's death she too wuz smit down, like a posy in acyclone. Arvilly, in her own clothes now, tended her like a mother, and as soon as she wuz able to travel took her back to Jonesville, where they make their home together, two widders, indeed, though theweddin' ring don't show on one of their hands. Waitstill goes about doin' good, waitin' kinder still, some like hername, till the Lord sends her relief by the angel that shall stand oneday in all our homes. She don't talk much. But Arvilly's grief is different. She told me one day when I wuztellin' her to chirk up and be more cheerful and comfortable: "I don't want to be comfortable; I don't want to feel any different. " "Whyee, Arvilly!" sez I, "don't you want to see any happiness agin?" "No, I don't, " sez she, "I don't want to take a minute's comfort andease while things are in the state they be. " Sez she, "Would you wantto set down happy, and rock, and eat peanuts, if you knew that yourhusband and children wuz drowndin' out in the canal?" "No, " sez I, "no, indeed! I should rush out there bareheaded, and if Icouldn't save 'em, would feel like dyin' with 'em. " "Well, " sez she, short as pie crust, "that's jest how I feel. " I believe and so Josiah duz that Arvilly would walk right up to aloaded cannon and argy with it if she thought it would help destroythe Saloon, and after she had convinced the cannon she would beperfectly willin' to be blowed up by it if the Saloon wuz blowed uptoo. Well, I sot thinkin' of all this till Tommy waked up and we all wentout into the dining car and had a good meal. We wuz a little over twodays goin' from Salt Lake City to San Francisco, and durin' that timeI calculated that I eat enough dirt, that bitter alkali sand, to lastlawful all my life. I believe one peck of dirt is all the law allowsone person to consume durin' their life. It seems as if I eat morethan enough to meet legal requirements for me and Josiah, and I seemedto have a thick coatin' of it on my hull person. And poor littleTommy! I tried to keep his face clean and that wuz all I could do. But as we drew nearer to California the weather became so balmy anddelightful that it condoned for much that wuz onpleasant, and I sez tomyself, the lovely views I have seen between Chicago and California Ishall never forgit as long as memory sets up in her high chair. What a panorama it wuz--beautiful, grand, delightful, majestic, sublime--no words of mine can do it justice. No. I can never describethe views that opened on our admirin' and almost awe-struck vision asthe cars advanced through natural openin's in the mountains and anonartificial ones. Why, I had thought that the hill in front of old Grout Nickelson's wuzsteep, and the road a skittish one that wound around it above thecreek. But imagine goin' along a road where you could look downthousands of feet into running water, and right up on the other sideof you mountains thousands of feet high. And you between, poor specksof clay with only a breath of steam to keep you agoin' and preventyour dashin' down into that enormous abyss. But Grandeur sot on them mountain tops, Glory wuz enthroned on themsublime heights and depths, too beautiful for words to describe, toogrand for human speech to reproduce agin, the soul felt it and mustleave it to other souls to see and feel. On, on through mountain, valley, gorge and summit, waves ofgreen foliage, rocks all the beautiful colors of the rainbow, majestic shapes, seemin'ly fashioned for a home for the gods; whitepeaks--sun-glorified, thousands of feet high with blue sky above;ravines thousands of feet deep with a glint of blue water in thedepths, seemin' to mirror to us the truth that God's love andcare wuz over and under us. And so on and on; valleys, mountains, clear lakes, forests and broad green fields, tree shelteredfarms, and anon the broad prairie. It wuz all a panorama I nevertired of lookin' at, and lasted all the way to California. As our stay wuz to be so short in San Francisco, Miss Meechim andDorothy thought it would be best to go to a hotel instead of openin'Dorothy's grand house; so we all went to the tarven Miss Meechimpicked out, the beautifullest tarven that ever I sot eyes on, itseemed to me, and the biggest one. Havin' felt the swayin', jiggerin'motion of the cars so long, it wuz indeed a blessin' to set my foot onsolid ground once more, and Tommy and I wuz soon ensconced in a cozyroom, nigh Miss Meechim's sweet rooms. For she still insisted oncallin' their rooms sweet, and I wouldn't argy with her, for I spozethey did seem sweet to her. Tommy wuz tired out and I had to take him in my arms and rock him, after we'd had our supper, a good meal which Miss Meechim had brung upinto their settin'-room, though I insisted on payin' my part on't(she's a good creater, though weak in some ways). Well I rocked Tommyand sung to him: "Sweet fields beyend the swellin' flood. " And them sweet fields in my mind wuz our own orchard and paster, andthe swellin' flood I thought on wuzn't death's billers, but the watersthat rolled between California and Jonesville. Not one word had I hearn from my pardner sence leavin' New York. "Oh, dear Josiah! When shall I see thee agin?" So sung my heart, orruther chanted, a deep solemn chant. "Where art thou, Josiah, and whenshall we meet agin? And why, why do I not hear from thee?" The next mornin' after we arrived at San Francisco, Robert Strongappeared at the hotel bright and early, and I don't know when I'veever seen anybody I liked so well. Miss Meechim invited me into hersettin'-room to see him. Havin' hearn so much about his deep, earnest nater and deathlessdesire to do all the good he could whilst on his earthly pilgrimage, Iexpected to see a grave, quiet man with lines of care and conflictengraved deep on his sober, solemn visage. But I wuz never more surprised to see a bright, laughin', happy facethat smiled back into mine as Albina Meechim proudly introduced hernephew to me. Why, thinkses I to myself, where can such strength of character, suchnoble purpose, such original and successful business habits be hiddenin that handsome, smilin' face and them graceful, winnin' ways, as helaughed and talked with his aunt and Dorothy. But anon at some chance word of blame and criticism from Miss Meechim, makin' light of his City of Justice and its inhabitants, a lightblazed up in his eyes and lit up his face, some as a fire in our openfireplace lights up the spare-room, and I see stand out for a minuteon the background of his fair handsome face a picture of heroism, love, endeavor that fairly stunted me for a time. And I never feltafterwards anything but perfect confidence in him; no matter how lightand trifling wuz his talk with Dorothy, or how gay and boyishly happywuz his clear laughter. He had worked well and faithful, givin' his hull mind and heart to hisendeavor to do all the good he could, and now he wuz bound to playwell, and git all the good and rest he could out of his play spell. And I hadn't been with 'em more'n several hours before I thought thatI had seen further into his heart and hopes and intentions than MissMeechim had in all her born days. Robert Strong, before he went away, invited us all to go and see hisCity of Justice, and we agreed with considerable satisfaction to doso, or at least I did and I spoze the rest did. Miss Meechim would behappy in any place where her nephew wuz, that you could see plain, asmuch as she disapproved of his methods. Dorothy, I couldn't see soplain what she did think, she bein' one that didn't always let herlips say everything her heart felt, but she used Robert real polite, and we all had a real agreeable visit. Robert got a big carriage and took us all out driving that afternoon, Miss Meechim and I settin' on the back seat, and Robert and Dorothyfacing us, and Tommy perched on Robert's knee; Tommy jest took tohim, and visey-versey. Robert thought he wuz just about the brightestlittle boy he had ever seen, and Tommy sot there, a little pale buthappy, and wonnered about things, and Robert answered all his"wonners" so fur as he could. We drove through beautiful streets lined with elegant houses, and thedooryards wuz a sight. Think of my little scraggly geraniums andoleanders and cactuses I've carried round in my hands all winter andbeen proud on. And then think of geranium and oleander trees just ascommon as our maples and loaded with flowers. And palm and banannatrees, little things we brood over in our houses in the winter, androses that will look spindlin' with me, do the best I can, inDecember, all growin' out-doors fillin' the air with fragrance. Robert Strong said we must go to the Cliff House, and Tommy wanted tosee the seals. Poor things! I felt bad to see 'em and to think there wuz a war ofextermination tryin' to be waged aginst 'em, because they interferedwith the rights of a few. One of the most interesting animals on theWestern continent! It seems too bad they're tryin' to wipe 'em out ofexistence because the fishermen say they eat a sammon now and then. Why shouldn't they who more than half belong to the water-world oncein a great while have a little taste of the good things of that worldas well as to have 'em all devoured by the inhabitants of dry land?And they say that the seals eat sharks too--I should think that thatpaid for all the good fish they eat. But to resoom. Tommy didn't thinkof the rights or the wrongs of the seals, he had no disquietin'thoughts to mar his anticipations, but he wonnered if he could put hishands through 'em like he could his ma's seal muff. He thought thatthey wuz muffs, silk lined--the idee! And he "wonnered" a sight whenhe see the great peaceable lookin' creeters down in the water and onthe rocks, havin' a good time, so fur as we could see, in their ownworld, and mindin' their own bizness; not tryin' to git ashore andkill off the fishermen, because they ketched so many sammons. AndTommy had to feed the seals and do everything he could do, RobertStrong helpin' him in everything he undertook, and he "wonnered" ifthey would ever be changed into muffs, and he "wonnered" if they wouldlike to be with "ribbon bows on. " At my request we went through Lone Mountain Cemetery, a low mountainrising from the sandy beach full of graves shaded by beautiful treesand myriads of flowers bending over the silent sleepers, theresistless sea washing its base on one side--just as the sea of Deathis washing up aginst one side of Life--no matter how gay and happy itis. We rode home through a magnificent park of two thousand acres. Moneyhad turned the sandy beach into a wealth of green lawns, beautifultrees and myriads of flowers. I had always sposed that them EasternGenis in the "Arabian Nights" had palaces and things about as grandand luxurious as they make, but them old Genis could have got lots ofpinters in luxury and grand surroundin's if they'd seen the homes ofthese nabobs in the environins of San Francisco. No tongue can tellthe luxury and elegance of them abodes, and so I hain't a goin' to gitout of patience with my tongue if it falters and gins out in thetask. CHAPTER VI The next mornin' while Miss Meechim and Dorothy wuz to the lawyers, tendin' to that bizness of hern and gittin' ready for their longtower, Robert Strong took me through one of them palaces. It stoodonly a little distance from the city and wuz occupied by one oldgentleman, the rest of the family havin' died off and married, leavin'him alone in his glory. Well said, for glory surrounded the hullspot. There wuz three hundred acres, all gardens and lawns and a drivin'park and a park full of magestick old live oaks, and acres and acresof the most beautiful flowers and all the choicest fruit you couldthink of. The great stately mansion was a sight to go through--halls, libraries, gilded saloons, picture galleries, reception halls lined with mirrors, billiard rooms, bowling alleys, whatever that may be, dining rooms, with mirrors extending from the floor to the lofty ceilin's. I wondered if the lonely old occupant ever see reflected in them tallmirrors the faces of them who had gone from him as he sot there atthat table, like some Solomon on his throne. But all he had to do wuzto press his old foot on a electric bell under the table, and fortyservants would enter. But I'dno as he'd want 'em all--I shouldn't--itwould take away my appetite, I believe. Twenty carriages of all kindsand thirty blooded horses wuz in his stables, them stables bein'enough sight nicer than any dwellin' house in Jonesville. But what did that feeble old man want of twenty carriages? To save hislife he couldn't be in more than one to a time; and I am that afraidof horses, I felt that I wouldn't swap the old mair for the hull on'em. At my strong request we made a tower one day to see StanfordUniversity, that immense schoolhouse that is doin' so much good in theworld; why, good land! it is larger than you have any idee on; why, take all the schoolhouses in Jonesville and Loontown and Zoar and put'em all together, and then add to them all the meetin' houses in allthem places and then it wouldn't be half nor a quarter so big as thisnoble schoolhouse. And the grounds about it are beautiful, beautiful! We wuz shownthrough the buildin', seein' all the helps to learning of all kindsand the best there is in the world. And how proud I felt to think whatone of my own sect had done in that great werk. How the cross of agonylaid on her shoulders had turned to light that will help guide overlife's tempestenus ten millions yet onborn. And I sez: "How happyyoung Leeland must be to know his death has done such grand work, andto see it go on. " "Why, " sez Meechim, "how could he see it? He's dead. " Sez I: "Don't you spoze the Lord would let him see what a great lighthis death has lit up in the werld. In my opinion he wuz right thereto-day lookin' at it. " "That is impossible, " sez she. "If he wuz there we should have seenhim. " Sez I: "You don't see the x-rays that are all about you this veryminute; but they are there. You can't see the great force Marconi usesto talk with, but it walks the earth, goes right through mountains, which you and I can't do, Miss Meechim. It is stronger than the solidearth or rock. That shows the power of the invisible, that what wecall the real is the transitory and weak, the invisible is the lastingand eternal. What we have seen to-day is sorrow chrystalized intogrand shapes. A noble young heart's ideal and asperations wrought outby loveng memory in brick and mortar. The invisible guiding the eye, holding the hand of the visible building for time and eternity. " Miss Meechim's nose turned up and she sniffed some. She wuz aforeigner, how could she know what I said? But Dorothy and Robertseemed to understand my language, though they couldn't speak it yet. And good land! I hain't learnt its A B C's yet, and don't spoze Ishall till I git promoted to a higher school. Well, it wuz on a lovely afternoon that we all went out to the City ofJustice, and there I see agin what great wealth might do in lighteningthe burdens of a sad world. Robert Strong might have spent his moneyjest as that old man did whose place I have described, and live instill better style, for Robert Strong wuz worth millions. But he feltdifferent; he felt as if he wanted his capital to lighten the burdenon the aching back of bowed down and tired out Labor, and let it standup freer and straighter for a spell. He felt that he could enjoy hiswealth more if it wuz shared accordin' to the Bible, that sez if youhave two coats give to him that hasn't any, and from the needy turnnot thou away. That big building, or ruther that cluster and village of buildings, didn't need any steeples to tell its mission to the world. Lots of ourbiggest meetin' houses need 'em bad to tell folks what they stand for. If it wuzn't for them steeples poor folks who wander into 'em out oftheir stifling alleys and dark courts wouldn't mistrust what they wuzfor. They would see the elegantly dressed throng enter and pass overcarpeted aisles into their luxuriously cushioned pews, and kneel downon soft hassocks and pray: "Thy kingdom come, " and "Give us this dayour daily bread, " and "give us what we give others. " These poor folkscan't go nigh 'em, for the usher won't let 'em, but they meet 'emthrough the week, or hear of 'em, and know that they do all in theirpower to keep his kingdom of Love and Justice away from the world. They herd in their dark, filthy, death-cursed tenements, not fit forbeasts, owned by the deacon of that church, and all the week run thegauntlet of those drink hells, open to catch all their hard-earnedpennies, owned by the warden and vestrymen and upheld by the clergymenand them high in authority, and extolled as the Poor Man's Club. Wimmen who see their husbands enticed to spend all their money thereand leave them and their children starving and naked; mothers who seetheir young boys in whom they tried to save a spark of their childishinnocence ground over in these mills of the devil into brutal ruffianswho strike down the care-worn form of the one that bore them in agony, and bent over their cradle with a mother's love and hope. As they seeall this, and know that this is the true meaning of the prayers put upin them elegant churches, don't they need steeples to tell thatthey're built to show Christ's love and justice to the world? Yes, indeed; they need steeples and high ones, too. But this city of Robert Strong's didn't need steeples, as I say. Itwuz Christianity built in bricks and mortar, practical religion livedright before 'em from day to day, comfortable houses for workmen, which they could hope to earn and call their own. Pleasant homes wherehappy love could dwell in content, because no danger stood round, hidin saloons to ruin husband, son and father; comfortable houses wherehealth and happiness could dwell. Good wages, stiddy work, and a sharein all the profits made there; good hard work whilst they did work, ensurin' success and prosperity; but short hours, ensurin' sunthin'beyond wages. A big house, called a Pleasure House, stood in the centre of thebroad, handsome streets, a sort of a centrepiece from which streams ofhappiness and health flowed through the hull city, some as them littlerills of pure snow water flowed through the streets of Salt Lake andDenver. Where all sorts of innocent recreation could be found to suitall minds and ages. A big library full of books. A museum full of theriches of science and art. A big music hall where lovers of musiccould find pleasure at any time, and where weekly concerts was given, most of the performers being of the musically inclined amongst theyoung people in the City of Justice. A pretty little theatre wherethey could act out little plays and dramas of a helpful, inspirin'sort. A big gymnasium full of the best appliances and latest helps tophysical culture. A large bathing tank where the white marble stepsled down to cool, sweet waters flowing through the crystal pool, freeto all who wanted to use it. A free telephone linking the hull placetogether. I roamed along through the beautiful streets and looked onthe happy, cheerful-faced workmen, who thronged them now, for theirshort day's work wuz ended and they wuz goin' home. My heart swelledalmost to bustin' and I sez almost unbeknown to myself, to RobertStrong who wuz walkin' by my side: "We read about the New Jerusalemcomin' down to earth, and if I didn't know, Robert Strong, that youhad founded this city yourself, I should think that this wuz it. " He laughed his boyish laugh, but I see the deep meanin' in his clear, gray eyes and knew what he felt, though his words wuz light. "Oh no, " sez he, "we read that those gates are pearl; these are justcommon wood, turned out by my workmen. " Sez I, "The pearl of love and good will to man, the precious stun ofpractical religion and justice shines on these gates and everybuildin' here, and I bless the Lord that I have ever lived to see whatI have to-day. " And I took out my snowy linen handkerchief and shedsome tears on it, I was so affected. Robert Strong wuz touched to his heart, I see he wuz, but kep' up, hisnater bein' such. Miss Meechim and Dorothy wuz walkin' a little ahead, Tommy between 'em. And anon we come to the house Robert lived in; nota bit better than the others on that street, but a nice comfortablestructure of gray stun and brick, good enough for anybody, with widesunshiny windows, fresh air, sunshine, plenty of books, musicalinstruments and furniture good enough, but nothing for show. Here his motherly-looking housekeeper spread a nice lunch for us. Hisoverseer dined with us, a good-looking chap, devoted to Robert Strong, as I could see, and ready to carry out his idees to the full. MissMeechim couldn't find anything, it seemed to me, to pick flaws in, butshe did say to me out to one side, "Just think how Robert lives in ahouse no better than his workmen, and he might live in a palace. " Sez I, warmly, "Robert Strong's body may stay in this comfortablebrick house, good enough for anybody, but the real Robert Strongdwells in a royal palace, his soul inhabits the temple of the Lord, paved with the gold and pearl of justice and love, and its ruffreaches clear up into heaven from where he gits the air his soulbreathes in. " "Do you think so? I never thought of it in that light; I have thoughthis ideas was erroneous and so my clergyman thinks. Rev. Dr. Weakdewsaid to me there were a great many texts that he had preached from allhis life, that if these ideas of Robert's was carried out universally, would be destroyed and rendered meaningless. Texts it had always beensuch a comfort to him to preach from, he said, admonishing the poor oftheir duty to the rich, and comforting the poor and hungry and nakedwith assurances that though hungry here they may partake of the breadof life above, if they are humble and patient and endure to the end, and though shivering and naked here, they may be clothed in garmentsof light above. " And I sez, "Bein' that we are all in this world at present, I believethe Lord would ruther we should cover the naked limbs and feed thestarvin' bodies here, and now, and leave the futur to Him. " But Miss Meechim shook her head sadly. "It sounds well, " sez she, "butthere is something wrong in any belief that overthrows Scripture andmakes the poor wealthy. " "Well, " sez I, "if it wuz our naked backs that the snow fell on, andthe hail pelted, and our stomachs that wuz achin' and faint for food, we should sing a different tune. " "I trust that I should sing a Gospel tune in any event, " sez she. "Well, " sez I, "we needn't quarrel about that, for we couldn't feelmuch like singin' in them cases. But if we did sing I think a goodhymn would be: Blest be the tie that binds Our hearts in Christian love. "And if the rich and poor, Capital and Labor would all jine in andsing this from the heart the very winders of heaven would open to hearthe entrancin' strains, " sez I. But I don't spoze I changed her mindany. Dorothy bein' naterally so smart, wuz impressed by all we had seen, Icould see she wuz, and when he wuzn't lookin' at her I could see hereyes rest on Robert Strong's face with a new expression of interestand approval. But she wuz full of light, happiness and joy--as she ortto be in her bright youth--and she and Robert and Miss Meechim spokeof the trip ahead on us with happy anticipations. But I--oh, that deep, holler room in my heart into which no strangerlooked; that room hung with dark, sombry black; remembrances of himthe great ocean wuz a-goin' to sever me from--he on land and I onsea--ten thousand miles of land and water goin' to separate us; howcould I bear it, how wuz I goin' to stand it? I kep' up, made remarksand answered 'em mekanically, but oh, the feelin's I felt on theinside. How little can we tell in happy lookin' crowds how many of thegay throng hear the rattle of their own private skeletons above thegayest music! Well, we got home to the Palace hotel in good season, I a-talkin'calmly and cheerfully, but sayin' in the inside, "'Mid pleasures andpalaces though we may roam, be it ever so humbly there is no placelike home. " My home wuz my pardner, the place where he wuz would lookbetter than any palace. I went up to my room and after gettin' Tommy to bed, who wuz cross andsleepy, I finished the letter to my help, for we wuz goin' to start inthe mornin'. "Oh, Philury!" the letter run, "my feelin's, you cannot parse 'em, even if you wuz better grounded in grammar than I think you be. Notone word from my beloved pardner do I hear--is Josiah dead?" sez I. "But if he is don't tell me; I could not survive, and Tommy has got tobe went with. But oh! if sickness and grief for me has bowed thathead, bald, but most precious to me, deal with him as you would dealwith a angel unawares. Bile his porridge, don't slight it or let it belumpy, don't give him dish-watery tea, brile his toast and make hisbeef tea as you would read chapters of scripter--carefully and notwith eye service. Hang my picter on the wall at the foot of the bed, and if it affects him too much, hang my old green braize veil over it, you'll find it in the hall cupboard. " But why should I sadden and depress the hearts of a good nateredpublic? I writ seven sheets of foolscap, and added to what I hadalready writ, it made it too big to send by mail, so I put it in acollar box and sent it by express, charges paid, for I knew the dearman it wuz addressed to, if he wuz still able to sense anything, wouldlike it better that way. And then my letter sent off I begun to packmy hair trunk anew. Well, the day dawned gloriously. I spoze I must have slep' some, forwhen I opened my eyes I felt refreshed. Tommy wuz awake in his littlebed and "wonnerin'" at sunthin' I spoze, for he always wuz, andbreakfast wuz partook of by the hull party, for Robert Strong had comewith a big carriage to take us to the ship and took breakfast with us, and soon, too soon for me, we stood on the wharf, surrounded by atumultous crowd, goin' every which way; passengers goin', visitorscomin', and officials from the ship goin' about tending to everything;trunks and baggage being slammed down and then anon being run onto theship, Miss Meechim's, Dorothy's and Robert Strong's baggage piled upon one side on us and I carefully keepin' watch and ward over asmall-sized hair trunk, dear to me as my apples in my eyes, becauseevery inch on it seemed to me like a sooveneer of that dear home Imight never see agin. As I stood holdin' Tommy by the hand and keepin' eagle watch over thattrunk, how much did that big ship look like a big monster that wuzagoin' to tear my heart all to pieces, tearin' my body from the groundthat kep' my pardner on its bosom. Tears that I could not restraindribbled down my Roman nose and onto my gray alpacky waist; Dorothysee 'em and slipped her kind little hand into mine and soothed myagony by gently whisperin': "Maybe you'll get a letter from him on the ship, Aunt Samantha. " Well, the last minute come, the hair trunk had been tore from my side, and I, too, had to leave terry firmy, whisperin' to myself words thatI'd hearn, slightly changed: "Farewell, my Josiah! and if forever, still forever fare thee well. " My tears blinded me so I could onlyjest see Tommy, who I still held hold of. I reached the upper deckwith falterin' steps. But lo, as I stood there wipin' my weepin' eyes, as the him sez, I hearn sunthin' that rung sweetly and clearly on myears over all the conflicting sounds and confusion, and that brung mewith wildly beatin' heart to the side of the ship. "Samantha! stop the ship! wait for me! I am comin'!" Could it be? Yes it wuz my own beloved pardner, madly racin' down thewharf, swingin' his familiar old carpet satchel in his hand, alsohuggin' in his arms a big bundle done up in newspaper, which busted ashe reached the water's edge, dribblin' out neckties, bandannahandkerchiefs, suspenders, cookies, and the dressin' gown withtossels. He scrambled after 'em as well as he could in his fearful hurry, andhis arms bein' full, he threw the dressin' gown round his shouldersand madly raced over the gang plank, still emitting that agonizingcry: "Samantha, wait for me! stop the ship!" which he kep' up after Ihad advanced onward and he held both my hands in hisen. Oh, the bliss of that moment! No angel hand, no reporter even for theNew York papers could exaggerate the blessedness of that time, much asthey knew about exaggeration. Tears of pure joy ran down both ourfaces, and all the sorrows of the past seperation seemed to dissolvein a golden mist that settled down on everything round us and beforeus. The land looked good, the water looked good, the sky showered downjoy as well as sunshine; we wuz together once more. We had no need ofspeech to voice our joy; but anon Josiah did say in tremblin' axentsas he pressed both my hands warmly in hisen: "Samantha, I've come!"And I, too, sez in a voice tremblin' with emotion: "Dear Josiah, I see you have. " And then I sez tenderly as I helped himoff with the dressin' gown: "I thought you said you couldn't leave thefarm, Josiah. " "Well, I wuz leavin' it; I wuz dyin'; I thought I might as well leaveit one way as t'other. I couldn't live without you, and finally Iketched up what clothes I could in my hurry and sot out, thinkin'mebby I could ketch you in Chicago. You see I have got my dressin'gown and plenty of neckties. " "Well, " sez I in my boundless joy and content, "there are things morenecessary on a long sea voyage than neckties, but I've got some socksmost knit, and I can buy some underclothes, and we will git alongfirst rate. " "Yes, Arvilly said so. " Sez he, "Arvilly told me you'dmanage. " "Arvilly?" sez I, in surprised axents. "Yes, Arvilly concluded to come too. She said that if you hadn'tstarted so quick she should have come with you. But when she found outI was comin' she jest set right off with me. She's brung along thatbook she's agent for, 'The Twin Crimes of America: Intemperance andGreed. ' She thinks she can most pay her way sellin' it. She jeststopped on the wharf to try to sell a copy to a minister. But here sheis. " And, sure enough, she that wuz Arvilly Lanfear advanced, puttin'some money in her pocket, she had sold her book. Well, I wuzsurprised, but glad, for I pitied Arvilly dretfully for what she hadwent through, and liked her. Two passengers had gin up goin' at thelast minute or they couldn't have got tickets. I advanced towards her and sez: "Arvilly Lanfear! or she that wuz, isit you?" "Yes, I've come, and if ever a human creeter come through sufferin' Ihave. Why, I've been agent for 'The Wild Deeds of Men' for years andyears, but I never knew anything about 'em till I come on this tower. I thought that I should never git that man here alive. He has wep' andwailed the hull durin' time for fear we shouldn't ketch you. " "Oh, no, Arvilly!" sez the joyous-lookin' Josiah. "I can prove it!" sez she, catchin' out his red and yeller bandannahandkerchief from his hat, where he always carries it: "Look at that, wet as sop!" sez she, as she held it up. It wuz proof, Josiah said nomore. "I knew we should ketch you, for I knew you would stop on the way. Ithought I would meet you at the deepo to surprise you. But I had tobank my house; I wuzn't goin' to leave it to no underlin' and have mystuff freeze. But when I hern that Josiah wuz comin' I jest dropped myspade--I had jest got done--ketched up my book and threw my thingsinto my grip, my trunk wuz all packed, and here I am, safe and sound, though the cars broke down once and we wuz belated. We have justtraipsed along a day or two behind you all the way from Chicago, I notknowin' whether I could keep him alive or not. " Sez I fondly, "What devoted love!" "What a natural fool!" sez Arvilly. "Did it make it any better for himto cry and take on? That day we broke down and had to stop at a tarvenI wuz jest mad enough, and writ myself another chapter on 'The WildDeeds of Men, ' and am in hopes that the publisher will print it. Itwill help the book enormously I know. How you've stood it with thatman all these years, I don't see; rampin' round, tearin' and groanin'and actin'. He didn't act no more like a perfessor than--than CaptainKidd would if he had been travelin' with a neighborin' female, pursuin' his wife, and that female doin' the best she could for him. Ikep' tellin' him that he would overtake you, but I might as well havetalked to the wind--a equinoctial gale, " sez she. Josiah wuz so happyher words slipped offen him without his sensin' 'em and I wuz toohappy to dispute or lay anything up, when she went on and sez: "I spoze that folks thought from our jawin' so much that we wuz manand wife; and he a yellin' out acrost the sleeper and kinder cryin', and I a hollerin' back to him to 'shet up and go to sleep!' It is thelast time I will ever try to carry a man to his wife; but I spozedwhen I started with him, he bein' a perfessor, he would actdifferent!" "Well, " sez I, in a kind of a soothin' tone, "I'm real glad you'vecome, Arvilly; it will make the ship seem more like Jonesville, and Iknow what you have went through. " "Well, " sez she, "no other livin' woman duz unless it is you. " Shekep' on thinkin' of Josiah, but I waved off that idee; I meant hertribulations in the army. And I sez, "You may as well spend your moneytravelin' as in any other way. " "Yes, I love to travel when I can travel with human creeters, and Imight as well spend my money for myself as to leave it for my cousinsto fight over, and I can pay my way mostly sellin' my book; and I'veleft my stuff so it won't spile. " "Where is Waitstill Webb?" sez I. "Oh, Waitstill has gone back to be a nurse--she's gone to thePhilippines. " Sez I gladly, "Then we shall see her, Arvilly. " "Yes, " sez she, "and that wuz one reason that I wanted to go, thoughshe's acted like a fool, startin' off agin to help the govermunt. I'vedone my last work for it, and I told her so; I sez, if see thegovermunt sinkin' in a mud hole I wouldn't lift a finger to help itout. I always wanted to see China and Japan, but never spozed Ishould. " "It is a strange Providence, indeed, Arvilly, that has started us bothfrom Jonesville to China. But, " sez I, "let me make you acquaintedwith the rest of our party, " and I introduced 'em. Josiah wuzembracin' Tommy and bein' embraced, and he had seen 'em all but RobertStrong. CHAPTER VII In a few minutes the great ship begun to breathe hard, as if tryin' togit up strength for the move, and kinder shook itself, and gin a fewhoarse yells, and sot off, seemin' to kinder tremble all over witheagerness to be gone. And so we sot sail, but ship and shore andboundless water all looked beautiful and gay to me. What a change, what a change from the feelin's I had felt; then the cold spectralmoonlight of loneliness rested on shore and Golden Gate, now thebright sun of love and happiness gilded 'em with their glorious rays, and I felt well. Well might Mr. Drummond say, "Love is the greatestthing in the world. " And as I looked on my precious pardner Ibethought fondly, no matter how little a man may weigh by thesteelyards, or how much a Arvilly may make light on him, if Love isenthroned in his person he towers up bigger than the hull universe. And so, filled with joy radiatin' from the presence of the bestbeloved, and under the cloudless sunshine of that glorious day, I setout on my Trip Abroad. Yes, I wuz once more embarked on that greatwatery world that lays all round us and the continents, and we can'thelp ourselves. And the days follered one another along in Injin file, trampin'silently and stiddily on, no matter where we be or what we do. So wesailed on and on, the ship dashin' along at I don't know how manyknots an hour. Probably the knots would be enough if straightened outto make a hull hank of yarn, and mebby more. Part of the time thewaves dashin' high. Mebby the Pacific waves are a little lesstumultous and high sweepin' than the Atlantic, a little more pacificas it were, but they sway out dretful long, and dash up dretful high, bearin' us along with 'em every time, up and down, down and up, andpart of the time our furniture and our stomachs would foller 'em andsway, too, and act. The wind would soar along, chasin' after us, butnever quite ketchin' us; sometimes abaft, sometimes in the fo'castle, whatever that may be. And under uz wuz the great silent graveyard, the solemn, green aisles, still and quiet, and no knowin' how soon we should be there, too, surrounded by the riches of that lost world of them that go down inships, but not doin' us any good. Only a board or two and some paintbetween us and destruction (but then I don't know as we are seperatedany time very fur from danger, earthquakes, tornados and such). Andgood land! I would tell myself and Josiah, for that matter I've knownwimmen to fall right out of their chairs and break themselves all upmore or less, and fall often back steps and suller stairs and such. But 'tennyrate I felt real riz up as I looked off on the heavin'billers, and Faith sez to me, "Why should I fear since I sailed withGod. " The seas, I am journeying, I told myself with Duty on one sideof me and on the other side Josiah, and the sun of Love over all. Igot along without any seasickness to speak of, but my pardner sufferedontold agonies--or no, they wuzn't ontold, he told 'em all to me--yes, indeed! Tommy "wonnered" what made the big vessel sail on so fast, and whatmade so much water, where it all come from, and where it wuz all goin'to. And at night he would lay on his little shelf and "wonner" whatthe wind wuz sayin'; one night he spoke out kinder in rhyme, sez he:"Grandma, do you know what the wind is sayin?" And I sez: "No, dear lamb; what is it sayin'?" It has sounded dretful, kinderwild and skairful to me, and so it had to Josiah, I knew by the sitheshe had gin. Sez Tommy, it sez: "Don't be afraid my little child, God will take care of you all the while. " And I sez, "Thank you, Tommy, you've done me good. " And I noticed thatJosiah seemed more contented and dropped off to sleep real sweet, though he snored some. Sometimes Tommy would "wonner" what seasicknesswuz like, if it wuz any like measles, but didn't find out, for hewuzn't sick a day, but wandered about the great ship, happy as a king, making friends everywhere, though Robert Strong remained his chieffriend and helper. Dorothy wuz more beautiful than ever it seemed tome, a shadow of paleness over her sweet face peeping out from thewhite fur of her cunning little pink hood, makin' her look sweeterthan ever. There wuz two or three handsome young men on board whoappreciated her beauty, and I spoze the gold setting of her charmingyouth. But Miss Meechim called on Robert Strong to help protect her, which he did willingly enough, so fur as I could see, by payin' themost devoted attention to her himself, supplying every real or fanciedwant, reading to and with her, and walking up and down the deck withher, she leanin' on his arm in slippery times. "Dear boy!" said Miss Meechim, "how lovely he is to me. He would muchrather spend his time with the men in the smoking and reading room, but he has always been just so; let me express a wish and he flies toexecute it. He knows that I wouldn't have Dorothy marry for all theworld, and had it not been for his invaluable help I fear that shewould have fallen a prey to some man before this. " "She is a pretty girl, " sez I, "pretty as a pink rosy. " "Yes, " sez she, "she is a sweet girl and as good as she is beautiful. " [Illustration: There wuz the usual variety of people on the ship. --Page84. ] There was the usual variety of people on the ship. The rich familytravelin' with children and servants and unlimited baggage; the partyof school girls with the slim talkative teacher in spectacles, tellin''em all the pints of interest, and stuffin' 'em with knowledge gradualbut constant; the stiddy goin' business men and the fashionable ones;the married flirt and the newly married bride and husband, sheepishlookin' but happy; old wimmen and young ones; young men and old ones;the sick passenger confined to his bed, but devourin' more food thanany two well ones--seven meals a day have I seen carried into thatroom by the steward, while a voice weak but onwaverin' would call formore. There wuz a opera singer, a evangelist, an English nobleman, anda party of colored singers who made the night beautiful sometimes withtheir weird pathetic melodies. There wuz two missionaries on board, one the Rev. Dr. Wessel, realdignified actin' and lookin'--he wuz goin' out as a missionary toChina, and a young lady going out as a missionary to Africa, Evangeline Noble--she wuz a member of some kind of a sisterhood, soshe wuz called Sister Evangeline. I sot a sight of store by her thefirst time I laid eyes on her. Anybody could see that she wuz one ofthe Lord's anointed, and like our cousin John Richard, who went out asa missionary to Africa several years ago, she only wanted the Lord'swill pinted out to her to foller it to the death if necessary. Livin'so nigh to the Kingdom as she did she couldn't help its breezesfannin' her tired forehead occasionally, and the angels' songs and thesound of the still waters from reachin' her soul. She had left aluxurious home, all her loved ones, a host of friends, and wuz goin'out to face certain hardships, and probable sickness and death amongsta strange half savage people, and yet she had about the happiest faceI ever saw. His peace wuz writ down on her brow. Her Lord journeyedwith her and told her from day to day what he wanted her to do. Afterwe got well acquainted she told me that ever since her conversionthere were times when she became unconscious to things on earth, buther soul seemed to be ketched up to some other realm, where He, whowuz her constant helper and guide, told her what to do. I told Josiahabout it, and he sez: "I'd ruther see that than hear on't. How can she be ketched up, weighin' pretty nigh two hundred?" Sez I, "Your views are material, Josiah. I said her soul wuz ketchedup. " "Oh, well, my soul and body has ginerally gone together where I'vewent. " "I don't doubt that, " sez I, "not at all. Spiritual things arespiritually discerned. " "Well, " sez he, "I've hearn a sight about such things as that, but I'druther see 'em myself. " Well, it wuzn't but a day or two after that that he had a chance tosee if he had eyes. Sister Evangeline wuz settin' with Josiah and meon the deck, and all of a sudden while she wuz talkin' to us about herfuture life and work in Africa, her face took on a look as yourn wouldif your attention had been suddenly arrested by a voice calling you. She looked off over the water as if it wuzn't there, and I felt thatsomeone wuz talkin' to her we couldn't see--her face had jest thatlook, and at last I hearn her murmur in a low voice: "Yes, Master, I will go. " And most immegiately her soul seemed to come back from somewhere, andshe sez to me: "I am told that there is a poor woman amongst the steerage passengersthat needs me. " And she riz right up and started, like Paul, notdisobedient to the Heavenly vision, not for a minute. She told meafterward that she found a woman with a newly-born child almost dyingfor want of help. She was alone and friendless, and if SisterEvangeline hadn't reached her just as she did they would both havedied. She wuz a trained nurse, and saved both their lives, and she wuzas good as she could be to 'em till we reached port, where the woman'shusband wuz to meet her. Josiah acted stunted when I told him, but sez weakly, "I believe shehearn the woman holler. " And I sez, "She wuz fainted away, how could she holler?" And he sez, "It must be a heavy faint that will keep a woman fromtalkin'. " The other missionary, Elder Wessel, I didn't set quite so much storeby. His only child Lucia wuz on board going out to China with a richtea merchant's family as a governess for their little daughter, andsome one told me that one reason that Elder Wessel hearn such a loudcall to go as a missionary to China was because Lucia wuz goin'there. Now, there wuz a young chap over in Loontown who had tried doctorin'for a year or two and didn't make much by it, and he thought he see asign up in the heavens, G. P. , and he gin out that he had had a call"go preach, " and went to preachin', and he didn't make so well by thatas he did by his doctorin', and then he gin out that he had made amistake in readin' the letters; instead of goin' to preach they meant"give pills, " so he went back to his doctorin' agin, and is doin'first rate. That wuzn't a call. But to resoom. Elder Wessel jest worshipped this daughter, and thoughtshe wuz the sweetest, dearest girl in the world. And she wuz a prettygirl with soft, bright innocent eyes. She wuz educated in a convent, and had the sweet, gentle manners and onworldly look that so manyconvent-bred girls have. She and Aronette struck up a warm friendship, though her pa wouldn't have allowed it I spoze if he hadn't seen howmuch store we all sot by Aronette. We got real well acquainted with Elder Wessel and Lucia; and her proudpa wuz never tired of singin' her praises or ruther chantin' 'em--hewuz too dignified to sing. Arvilly loved to talk with him, thoughtheir idees wuz about as congenial as ile and water. He wuz real mildand conservative, always drinked moderate and always had wine on histable, and approved of the canteen and saloon, which he extolled asthe Poor Man's Club. He thought that the government wuz jest right, the big trusts and license laws jest as they should be. Arvilly dearly loved to send sharp arrows of sarkasm and argumentthrough his coat armor of dignified complacency and self-esteem, fortruly his idees wuz to her like a red rag to a bull. Miss Meechim kinder looked down on Arvilly, and I guess Arvilly lookeddown on her. You know it happens so sometimes--two folks will feelreal above each other, though it stands to reason that one of 'em mustbe mistook. Miss Meechim thought she wuz more genteel than Arvilly, and was worth more, and I guess she had had better advantages. AndArvilly thought she knew more than Miss Meechim, and I guess mebby shedid. Miss Meechim thought she wuz jest right herself, she thought hernative land wuz jest right and all its laws and customs, and naterallyshe looked down dretfully on all foreigners. She and Arvilly had lotsof little spats about matters and things, though Miss Meechim wuz sogenteel that she kep' her dignity most of the time, though Arvilly ginit severe raps anon or oftener. But one tie seemed to unite 'em a little--they wuz real congenial onthe subject of man. They both seemed to cherish an inherent aversionto that sect of which my pardner is an ornament, and had a strongsettled dislike to matrimony; broken once by Arvilly, as a sailor maybreak his habit of sea-faring life by livin' on shore a spell, butstill keepin' up his love for the sea. But of their talks together and Arvilly's arguments with Elder Wesselmore anon and bime by. Arvilly stood up aginst the sea-sickness as shewould aginst a obstinate subscriber, and finally brought the sicknessto terms as she would the buyer, on the third day, and appeared palebut triumphant, with a subscription book in her hand and the words ofher prospectus dribblin' from her lips. She had ordered a trunkful tosell on sight, but Arvilly will never git over what she has wentthrough, never. As the days went on the big ship seemed more and more to us like aworld, or ruther a new sort of a planet we wuz inhabitin'--it kinderseemed to be the centre of the universe. I overheard a woman say oneday how monotonous the life wuz. But I thought to myself, mebby hermind wuz kinder monotonous--some be, you know, made so in the firston't; I found plenty enough to interest me, and so Josiah did. There wuz a big library where you could keep company with the greatminds of the past and present. A music room where most always some ofthe best music wuz to be hearn, for of course there wuz lots ofmusicians on board, there always is. And for them that wanted it, there wuz a smokin' room, though Josiah or I didn't have any use forit, never havin' smoked anything but a little mullen and catnip onceor twice for tizik. And there wuz a billiard room for them thatpatronized Bill, though I never did nor Josiah, but wuz willin' thatfolks should act out their own naters. I spoze they played cardsthere, too. But Josiah and I didn't know one card from another; Icouldn't tell Jack from the King to save my life. We stayed in the music room quite a good deal and once or twice Josiahexpressed the wish that he had brought along his accordeon. And he sez: "It don't seem right to take all this pleasure and notgive back anything in return. " But I sez, "I guess they'll git along without hearin' that accordeon. " "I might sing sunthin', I spose, " sez he. "I could put on my dressin'gown and belt it down with the tossels and appear as a singer, andsing a silo. " That wuz the evenin' after Dorothy, in a thin, white dress, a littlelow in the neck and short sleeves, had stood up and sung a lovelypiece, or that is I 'spoze it wuz lovely, it wuz in some foreigntongue, but it sounded first rate, as sweet as the song of a robin ormedder lark--you know how we all like to hear them, though we can'tquite understand robin and lark language. It wuz kinder good inJosiah to want to give pleasure in return for what he had had, but Iargyed him into thinkin' that he and I would give more pleasure as acongregation than as speakers or singers. For after I had vetoed thesingin' that good man proposed that he should speak a piece. Sez he, "I could tell most the hull of the American Taxation. " And I sez, "I wouldn't harrer up the minds of the rich men on boardwith thoughts of taxes, " sez I, "when lots of 'em are goin' away toget rid on 'em. " "Well, " sez he, "I could tell the hull of Robert Kidd. " And I sez, "Well, I wouldn't harrer up their feelin's talkin' abouthullsale stealin'; they have enough of that to hum in the bigcities. " So gradual I got him off from the idee. There wuz one little boy about Tommy's age and a sister a little olderI felt real sorry for, they looked so queer, and their ma, a thin, wirey, nervous lookin' woman brooded over 'em like a settin' hen overher eggs. They wuz dressed well, but dretful bulged out and swollenlookin', and I sez to their ma one day: "Are your children dropsical?" And she sez, "Oh, no, their health is good. The swellin's you see arelife preservers. " She said that she kep' one on their stomachs nightand day. Well, I knew that they would be handy in a shipwreck, but it made 'emlook queer, queer as a dog. And now whilst the passengers are all settin' or standin' on their ownforts and tendin' to their own bizness, and the big ship ploughin' itsbig liquid furrow on the water I may as well tell what Arvilly wentthrough. I spoze the reader is anxious to know the petickulers of howshe come to be in the Cuban army and desert from it. The reason of herbein' in the army at all, her husband enlisted durin' the struggle forCuban independence, and Arvilly jest worshippin' the ground he walkedon, and thinkin' the world wuz a blank to her where he wuz not, afterthe last care he left her wuz removed, and always havin' done as shewuz a mind to as fur as she could, she dressed herself up in a suit ofhis clothes and enlisted onbeknown to him, so's to be near to him ifhe got woonded, and 'tennyrate to breathe the same air he did andsleep under the same stars. She adored him. It must be remembered that Arvilly had never loved a single thing tillshe fell in love with this man, her folks dyin' off and leavin' her tocome up the best she could, and imposed upon and looked down upon onevery side, and workin' hard for a livin', and after she got oldenough to read and understand, bein' smart as a whip and one of thefirmest lovers of justice and fair play that ever wuz born, she becomesuch a firm believer in wimmen's rights that she got enemies that way. Well, you know right when she started for the World's Fair, helpin'herself along by sellin' the book, "The Wild, Wicked, and WarlikeDeeds of Men" (which she said she felt wuz her duty to promulgate towimmen to keep 'em from marryin' and makin' fools of themselves). Well, right there, some like Paul on his way to Jerusalem breathin'vengeance against his Lord, a great light struck him down in the road, so with Arvilly, the great light of Love stopped her in her career, she dropped her book, married the man she loved and who loved her, andlived happy as a queen till the Cuban war broke out. Her husband wuz a good man, not the smartest in the world, but a good, honest God-fearin' man, who had had a hard time to get along, butalways tried to do jest right, and who hailed Arvilly's brightintellect and practical good sense and household knowledge as awelcome relief from incompetence in hired girl form in the kitchen. His first wife died when his little girl wuz born, and she wuz aboutseven when Arvilly married her pa. Well, he bein' jest what hewuz--conscientious, God-fearin' and havin' hearn his minister preachpowerful sermons on this bein' a war of God aginst the Devil, enlightenment and Christianity aginst ignorance and barbarism, Americaaginst Spain--he got all fired up with the sense of what wuz his dutyto do, and when his mind wuz made up to that no man or woman couldturn him. Arvilly might have just as well spent her tears andentreaties on her soapstun. No, go he must and go he would. But likethe good man he wuz, he made everything just as comfortable as hecould for her and his little daughter, a pretty creeter that Arvillytoo loved dearly. And then he bid 'em a sad adoo, for he loved 'emwell, and Arvilly had made his home a comfortable and happy one. Buthe choked back his tears, tried to smile on 'em with his tremblin'lips, held 'em both long in his strong arms, onclosed 'em, and theywuz bereft. Well, Arvilly held the weeping little girl in her arms, bent over her with white face and dry eyes, for his sake endured thelong days and longer nights alone with the child, for his sake takinggood care of her, wondering at the blow that had fell upon her, wondering that if in the future she could be so blest agin as to havea home, for love is the soul of the home, and she felt homeless. Well, she watched and worked, takin' good care of the little one, butbolts and bars can't keep out death; Arvilly's arms, though she wuzstrong boneded, couldn't. Diphtheria wuz round, little Annie took it;in one week Arvilly wuz indeed alone, and when the sod lay between herand what little likeness of her husband had shone through the child'spretty face, Arvilly formed a strange resolution, but not so strangebut what wimmen have formed it before, and probably will agin tillGod's truth shall shine on a dark world and be listened to, and warsshall be no more. She made up her mind to foller the man she loved, toenlist. She wuz always a masculine lookin' creeter, big, raw boneded, and when she cut off her hair and parted it on one side in a man's wayand put on a suit of her husband's clothes she looked as much, or morelike a man than she had ever looked like a woman. She locked thedoors of her home till the cruel war should be ended, and he whoselove made her home should return. Till then, if indeed it should everbe, she left her happiness there in the empty, silent rooms andsallied off. She had disposed of her stock and things like that, folksnot bein' surprised at it, bein' she wuz alone, but all to once shedisappeared, utterly and entirely, nobody hearn of her and folksthought that mebby she had wandered off in her grief and put an end toher life. Not one word wuz hearn of her until lo and behold! thestrange news come, Arvilly's husband wuz killed in a drunken brawl ina licensed Canteen down in Cuba and Arvilly had deserted from thearmy, and of course bein' a woman they couldn't touch her for it. Thatwuz the first we ever knowed that she wuz in the army. CHAPTER VIII Arvilly deserted from the army and gloried in it; she said, bein' awoman born, she had never had a right, and now she took it. After herhusband wuz buried, and her hull life, too, she thought for a spell, she deserted, but bein' ketched and court-martialed, she appearedbefore the officers in her own skirt and bask waist and dared 'em totouch her. Waitstill Webb, the young sweetheart of the man that shother husband, wuz with her. Good land! Arvilly didn't lay up nothin'aginst her or him; he wuz drunk as a fool when he fired the shot. Hedidn't know what he wuz doin'; he wuz made irresponsible by the law, till he did the deed, and then made responsible by the same law andshot. Waitstill wuz named from a Puritan great-great-aunt, whosebeauty and goodness had fell onto her, poor girl! She stood byArvilly. They wuz made friends on that dretful night when they hadstood by the men they loved, one killed and the other to be killed bythe govermunt. Poor things! they wuz bein' protected, I spoze ourgovermunt would call it; it always talks a good deal about protectin'wimmen; 'tennyrate the mantilly of the law hung over 'em both andshaded 'em, one man layin' dead, shot through the heart, the othercondemned to be shot, both on 'em by legal enactments, both men notknowin' or meanin' any more harm than my Josiah up in Jonesville if hehad been sot fire to by law and then hung by law because he smoked andblistered. Good land! them that sets a fire knows that there has gotto be smoke and blisters, there must be. The officers they wuz just dumb-foundered at the sight of a woman witha bask waist on in that position--a bein' court-martialed fordesertion--and her speech dumb-foundered 'em still more, so I spoze; Ihearn it from one who wuz there. Sez Arvilly to 'em, and they wuz drew up in battle array as you maysay, dressed up in uniform and quite a few on 'em, the Stars andStripes behind 'em, and the mantilly of the law drapin' 'em in heavyfolds. And I don't spoze that through her hull life Arvilly wuz everso eloquent as on that occasion. All her powers of mind and heart wuzelectrified by the dretful shock and agony she had underwent, and herwords fell like a hard storm of lightenin' and hail out of a sky whenit is just stored full of electrical power and has got to bust out. Sez Arvilly: "You men represent the force and power of the govermuntthat falsely sez it is the voice of the people; we two represent thepeople. As you are the force and power and will of the law, we are theendurance, the suffering. You decide on a war. When did a woman everhave any voice in saying that there should be a war? They bear thesons in agony that you call out to be butchered; their hearts are tornout of their bosoms when they let their husbands, sons and lovers gointo the hell of warfare, and you tax all her property to raise moneyto help furnish the deadly weapons that kill and cut to pieces thewarm, living, loving forms that they would give their lives for. "But you men decide on a war, as you have on this. You say it wuz frommotives of philanthropy and justice; you drag us, the people, out ofpeaceful, happy homes to leave all we love, to face mutilation, agonyand death; you say your cause wuz just, I say it is a war ofrevenge--a war of conquest. " Why it fairly made goose pimples run over me when I hearn on't. Sassin' the govermunt, she wuz--nothin' more nor less. But she went onworse than ever. "You say that it wuz to give freedom to the people of Cuba. Look atthe millions of your own wimmen enslaved in legal fetters! You say itwuz to protect the wimmen and children of Cuba from the cruelty andbrutality of unscrupulous rulers. Look at the wimmen and children ofyour own country cowering and hiding from crazed drunken husbands, sons and fathers. More misery, murder, suicides, abuse and sufferingof every kind is caused by the saloon every day of the year in theUnited States than ever took place in Cuba in twice the same time, andyou not only stand by and see it, but you take pay from the butchersfor slaughtering the innocents! You miserable hypocrites, you!" SezArvilly, "I would talk about pity and mercy, you that know no pity andno mercy for your own wimmen and children. "You pose before foreign nations as a reformer, a righter of wrongs, when you have cherished and are cherishing now the most gigantic crimeand wrong that ever cursed a people; turning a deaf ear to theburdened and dying about you; wives, mothers, daughters--for whosesafety and well-being you are responsible--have told you that thesaloon killed all the manhood and nobility of their husbands, sons, and fathers; made the pure, good men, who loved and protected them, into cold-hearted brutes and demons who would turn and rendthem--still you would not hear. You have seen the dretful processionof one hundred thousand funerals pass before you every year, slain bythis foe that you pamper and protect. "Lovers of good laws have told you that the saloon blocked up the wayto every reform and wuz the greatest curse of the day; still you threwyour mighty protection around the system and helped it on. The mosteminent doctors have told you that drunkenness ruined the bodies ofmen; Christian clergymen told you that it ruined their souls, and thatthe saloon was the greatest enemy the Church of Christ had to contendwith to-day; that when by its efforts and sacrifices it saved one soulfrom ruin, the saloon ruined two to fill the place of that one whowuz saved, and still you opholded it. "Petitions signed by hundreds of thousands of the best people of theland have been sent to you, but these petitions, weighted down withthe tears and prayers of these people, have been made a jest and amock of by you. And strangest, most awful of sights--incredible almostto men and angels--this govermunt, that sot out as a reformer toChristianize Cuba and the Philippines, have planted there thisheaviest artillery of Satan, the saloon, to bind the poor islanders inworse bondage and misery than they ever dremp on. Hain't you ashamedof yourself! You fool and villain!" (Oh! dear me! Oh, dear suz! Tothink on't; Arvilly wuz talkin' to the govermunt, and callin' it afool and villain! The idee! Why, it wuz enough to skair anybody mostto death!) I spoze it made a great adoo. I spoze that the men whorepresented the govermunt wuz too horrified to make a reply. Arvillyalways did go too fur when she got to goin'. But it can't be deniedthat she had great reason for her feelin's, for the strongest argumentwuz still to come. I spoze she got almost carried away by her own talkand feelin's, for all of a sudden they said she lifted her long bonyhand and arm--Arvilly always wuz kinder spare in flesh--she lifted upher arm and her bony forefinger seemed to be follerin' the lines ofsome words writ up there on the wall, sez she slowly, in a awfulvoice: "My country! thou are weighed in the balance and found wanting!" It wuz indeed thrillin', but after a minute's silence she went on:"Look at me!" sez she, pintin' that same forefinger first at herselfand then at the tall veiled figger of the young girl beside her--"Lookat us; we, the people, represent to you another of your favoritereforms, the Canteen, that product of civilization and Christianityyou transplanted from our holy shores to the benighted tropics. Howmany petitions have you had wet with the tears of wives and mothers, weighted down with their prayers to close this gateway to hell. Butno, for a price, as Judas sold his Lord, you have trafficked in humansouls and will do so. And you are the power--you control; we are thepeople--we suffer. We leave all we love, we go out and fight yourbattles when you tell us to, we face mutilation and death foryou--isn't that enough? No; besides the foe in front you set usaginst, you introduce a foe into our midst that is a million times asfatal and remorseless. The foe in front only aims at our bodies; thisfoe, before it kills our bodies, kills honor, manhood, all that isnoble and worthy to be loved--a devilish foe indeed, but by yourcommand it is let loose upon us; we are the people, we must endure it. Look at me!"--agin she pinted that bony forefinger at herself--"I hada husband I loved as well as the gracious lady in the White Houseloves her husband. He wuz a good man. He thought he owed a duty to hiscountry. He went to fight her battles at her call. He might haveescaped Spanish bullets, but not this foe this Christian govermunt setaginst him. In a low Canteen, a vile drinking den, rented by you forthe overthrow of men's souls and bodies, in a drunken brawl a bulletaimed by a crazed brain for another poor ruined boy reached myhusband's faithful heart, faithful to the country that slew him, notfor patriotism or honor, but for a few pennies of money--not even thethirty pieces of silver Judas earnt for betraying his Lord. Thisbullet wuz sent from the hand of a young man, a college graduate, oneof the noblest, brightest and best of men until this foe our govermuntset for him vanquished him. He got into a quarrel with another drunkenyouth, another victim of the Canteen, and meant to shoot him, but theunsteady hand sent it into the heart of my husband, who went into thatvile place thinkin' he could appease the quarrel. This young man wasshot for _your_ crime and here is his widow, " and turning toWaitstill, she said, "Lift up your vail; let them look upon us, thepeople. " The young girl drew back her vail and a face of almost perfect beautywuz disclosed, but white as death. The big dark eyes wuz full ofsorrow and despair, sadder than tears. She simply said: "I loved him--he was murdered--I have come to denounce his murderers. " Her voice wuz low, but the words fell like drops of blood, so vivid, so full were they of the soul of her being. "Yes, " sez Arvilly, "and you are his murderer. Not the Spaniards, notthe foe of this govermunt that the poor young fellow tried with aboy's warm-hearted patriotism to save. You murdered him. " She turnedto let her companion speak agin, but the power to speak had gone fromher; her slender figure swayed and Arvilly caught her in her strongarms. She had fainted almost away; she could say no more. But whatmore could she say to this govermunt. "He was murdered--I loved him--I have come to denounce his murderers. " Arvilly helped Waitstill down on a bench where she leaned back stilland white most as if she wuz dead. But before Arvilly went out withWaitstill leanin' on her arm, she turned and faced them dumb-founderedmen once more: "Who is accountable for the death of her lover?" pintin' to the frail, droopin' figger. "Who is accountable for the death of my husband? Whois accountable for the death and everlastin' ruin of my son, myhusband, my father and my lover? sez the millions of weepin' wimmen inAmerica that the Canteen and saloon have killed and ruined. Thesequestions unanswered by you are echoin' through the hull countrydemandin' an answer. They sweep up aginst the hull framework of humanlaws made professedly to protect the people, aginst every voter in theland, aginst the rulers in Washington, D. C. , aginst the Church ofChrist--failing to git an answer from them they sweep up to God'sthrone. There they will git a reply. Woe! woe! to you rulers whodeviseth iniquity to overthrow the people committed to your care. " Arvilly then went out, leadin' Waitstill, and when she come back toJonesville she come with her, a patient mourner, good to everybody andgoin' out to day's works for seventy-five cents a day, for she had noother way to live, for she wuzn't strong enough then to go on with hernursing and she hadn't a relation on earth, and the man our govermuntmurdered in that Canteen represented all there wuz on this broad earthfor her to love. They worshipped each other, and Waitstill is waitin'till the time comes for her to die and meet the man she loved andlost, havin' to live in the meantime, because she couldn't stopbreathin' till her time come. So, as I say, she went out doin' plainsewin', beloved by all both great and small, but a mourner if thereever wuz one, lookin' at his picture day in and day out, which shewears in her bosom in a locket--a handsome, manly face, took beforeour govermunt made a crazy lunatick and a murderer of him. Jest as different from Arvilly as day is from night, but the coldhands of grief holds their hearts together and I spoze that she willalways make it her home with Arvilly as long as she lives, she wantsher to--that is, if the plan I have in my head and heart don't amountto anything, but I hope for the land sake that it will, for as I'vesaid many a time and gin hints to her, there never wuz two folks moremade for each other than she and Elder White. But she's gone now to the Philippines as a nurse in a hospital, whichshows how different she and Arvilly feels; Arvilly sez that shewouldn't do anything to help the govermunt agin in any way, shape ormanner, not if they should chain her and drag her to the front; shewould die before she would help the great, remorseless power thatkilled her husband for a little money. She's made in jest that way, Arvilly is, jest as faithful to the remembrance of her wrongs as a dogis to a bone, settin' and gnawin' at it all the time. And when theycome to collect her taxes last year she says: "No taxes will you ever git out of me to help rare up Saloons andCanteens to kill some other woman's husband. " "But, " sez the tax man, a real good man he wuz and mild mannered, "youshould be willing to help maintain the laws of your country thatprotects you. " And then I spose that man's hair (it wuz pretty thin, anyway) rizright up on his head to hear her go on tellin' about the govermuntkillin' her husband. But seein' she wuz skarin' him she kinder quelledherself down and sez: "What has this country ever done for me. I have had no more voice inmakin' the laws than your dog there. Your dog is as well agin off, forit don't have to obey the laws, that it has no part in makin'. If itdigs up a good bone it don't have to give it to some dog politician toraise money to buy dog buttons to kill other dogs and mebby its ownpups. Not one cent of taxes duz this hell-ridden govermunt git out ofme agin--if I can help it. " The man ketched up his tax list and flewed from the house, butreturned with minions of the law who seized on and sold her shote shewuz fattin' for winter's use; sold it to the saloon keeper over toZoar for about half what it wuz worth, only jest enough to pay hertax. But then the saloon keeper controlled a lot of bum votes and thecollector wanted to keep in with him. Yes, as I wuz sayin', Waitstill Webb is as different from Arvilly as asoft moonlight night lit by stars is from a snappin' frosty noonday inJanuary. Droopin' like a droopin' dove, feelin' that the govermunt wuzthe worst enemy she and her poor dead boy ever had, as it turned out, but still ready to say: "Oh Lord, forgive my enemy, the Government of the United States, forit knows what it does. " Which she felt wuz ten-fold worse than as if it did wickedly withoutknowin' it, and she knew that they knowed all about it and couldn'tdeny it, for besides all the good men and wimmen that had preached to'em about it, they had had such sights of petitions sent in explainin'it all out and beggin' 'em to stop it, onheeded by them and scorfedat. But she stood ready to go agin and serve the govermunt as a nurse, trying to heal the woonds caused by bullet and knife, and the ten-foldworse woonds caused by our govermunt's pet wild beast it rents outthere to worry and kill its brave defenders. I looked forward withwarm anticipations to seein' her, for I sot store by her. She hadfixed over my gray alpacky as good as new, and made me a couple ofginghams, and I thought more of havin' her with me than I did of herwork, and once when I wuz down with a crick in the back, and couldn'tstir, she come right there and stayed by me and did for me till thecreek dwindled down and disappeared. Her presence is some like the Bamof Gilead, and her sweet face and gentle ways make her like an angelin the sick room. Arvilly is more like a mustard plaster than Bam. Buteverybody knows that mustard is splendid for drawin' attention to it;if it draws as it ort to, mustard must and will attract and holdattention. And I spoze there hain't no tellin' what good Arvilly hasdone and mebby will do by her pungent and sharp tongue to drawattention to wrongs and inspire efforts to ameliorate 'em. And thesame Lord made the Bam of Gilead and mustard, and they go welltogether. When mustard has done its more painful work then the Bamcomes in and duz its work of healin' and consolin'. 'Tennyrate anybodycan see that they are both on 'em as earnest and sincere in wantin' todo right as any human creeters can be, and are dretful well thought onall over Jonesville and as fur out as Loontown and Zoar. Some wimmen would have held a grudge aginst the man that murdered herhusband and not bore the sight of the one who loved and mourned him soconstant. But Arvilly had too much good horse sense for that; shecontends that neither of the men who wuz fightin' wuz much to blame. She sez that if a sane, well man should go out and dig a deep pit tocatch men for so much a head, and cover it all over with green grassand blossoms and put a band of music behind it to tempt men to walkout on it, to say nothin' of a slidin' path leadin' down to it, allsoft with velvet and rosy with temptations, if a lot of hot-headedyouth and weak men and generous open-minded men who wuzn't lookin' foranything wrong, should fall into it and be drownded for so much ahead, she sez the man who dug the pit and got so much apiece for themen he led in and ruined would be more to blame than the victims, andshe sez the man who owned the ground and encouraged it to go on wouldbe more to blame than the man who dug the pit. And further back themen who made the laws to allow such doin's, and men who voted to allowit, and ministers and the Church of Christ, who stood by like Pilate, consenting to it and encouraged by their indifference and neglect whatthey might have stopped if they wanted to--they wuz most to blame ofall. Well, this is what Arvilly has went through. Day by day we sailed onwards, and if the days wuz beautiful, thenights wuz heavenly, lit by the glowin' moon that seemed almost likeanother sun, only softer and mellerer lookin'; and the lustrous starsof the tropics seemed to flash and glitter jest over our head almostas if we could reach up and gather 'em in our hands into a sheaf oflight. The weather seemed to moderate and we had to put on our thinnestgarments in the middle of the day. But my poor Josiah could not makemuch change; he had to wear his pepper-and-salt costoom in publick, which wuz pretty thick, but I fixed sunthin' for him to wear in ourstate-room, where we passed considerable time. I took one of my outingjackets that was cut kinder bask fashion, trimmed with lace and bowsof ribbon and pinned it over in the back, and it fitted him quite welland wuz cool. He liked it; he thought it become him, it wuz sodressy, but I wouldn't let him appear in publick in it. I dressed Tommy in his summer suit, and wore my figgered lawn and wuznone too cool. We only had one heavy storm, but that wuz fearful;everything dashed round and wuz broke that could be. I put Tommy inhis little crib and fastened him in, and fastened my most precioustreasure, Josiah, to the berth. I then tied myself up, and we bore itas well as we could, though every time the ship went down into thetrough of the sea I felt that it wuz dubersome about its ever comin'out agin, and every time it mounted up on one of them stupendousbillers, higher than the Jonesville meetin' house, I felt doubtfulwhether or no it would fall bottom side up or not. Tommy wuz cryin', and Josiah wuz kinder whimperin', though for my sake he wuz tryin' tobear up. But I'll hang a curtain up before that seen and not take itdown agin till we wuz all ontied and the sun wuz shinin' down onsmoother waters. At last after seven days' stiddy sailin' a little spec wuz seen in thedistance one mornin' gradually growin' in size, and other littlespecks wuz sighted, also growin' gradual, and at last they turned tosolid land rising up out of the blue water, clad in strange andbeautiful verdure behind the white foamin' billers of surf. Andinstinctively as we looked on't I broke out singin' onbeknown to me, and Josiah jined in in deep base: "Sweet fields beyend the swellin' flood Stand dressed in livin' green. " We sung it to Balermy. Josiah hain't much of a singer, and my voicehain't what it once wuz, but I d'no as in any conference meetin' thathim ever sounded sweeter to me, or I sung it with more of the sperit. CHAPTER IX How beautiful wuz the shore as we approached it, its scenery differentfrom Jonesville scenery, but yet worth seein'--yes, indeed! Mountainand valley, rock and green velvet verdure, tall palm trees shadin'kinder low houses, but still beautiful and attractive. And whatbeautiful colors greeted our weary eyes as we drew nigher. I thoughtof that gate of Jerusalem the Golden, all enamelled with emerald, amethyst, chalcedony, and pearl sot in gold. The golden brown earthmade from melted lava, the feathery foliage of the palms that riz upbeyend the dazzlin' white beach, the crystal blue waters withmyriad-hued fishes playing down in its crystal depths. Oh, how fairthe seen as we approached nearer and see plainer and plainer thepictured beauty of the shore. Shinin' green valley, emerald-toppedmountain, amethyst sea; which wuz the most beautiful it wuz hard tosay. Evangeline Noble stood off by herself leanin' on the rail of the deckas if she see through the beauty into the inner heart of things, andsee in her mind's eye all the work her own people, the missionaries, had done there. The thought that they had taken the natives likediamonds incrusted in dirt and cleansed them of the blackest of theirhabits. She see in the past natives burying their children alive, putting to death the mentally weak, worshipping horrible idols, killing and eating their enemies, etc. , etc. But now, under theblessed light of the torch, that long procession of martyrs had heldup, the former things wuz passin' away, and she, too, wuz one of thatblessed host of God's helpers. She looked riz up and radiant as if shesee way beyend the islands of the sea and all she hoped to do for herMaster on earth, and as if he wuz talking to her now, teaching her hiswill. Nigher to us Elder Wessel wuz standing, and he sez, lifting up hiseyes to heaven: "Oh islands of the sea! where every prospect pleases and only man isvile. " And Arvilly hearn him and snapped out, "I d'no as they're so very viletill traders and other civilized folks teach 'em to drink and cheatand tear round. " His eyes lost in a minute that heavenly expressionthey had wore and sez he: "Oh, islands of the sea! where every prospect pleases and eat eachother up and etcetery. " "Well, I d'no, " sez she, "but I'd ruther be killed to once by a cluband eat up and be done with than to die by inches as wimmen do underour civilized American license laws. The savages kill their enemies, but the American savage kills the one that loves him best, and has tosee her children turned into brutes and ruffians, under what is calleda Christian dispensation. There hain't no hypocrisy and Phariseeism ina good straight club death, and most likely whilst he wuz eatin' me uphe wouldn't pose before foreign nations as a reformer and civilizer ofthe world. " "Oh, Sister Arvilly, " sez he, "think of the hideous idols theyworship! You can't approve of that, " sez he. But Arvilly, the ondanted, went on, "Well I never see or hearn of anysavage idol to compare in hegiousness with the Whiskey Power that isbuilt up and pampered and worshipped by Americans rich and poor, highand low, Church and State. Let any one make a move to tear that idoldown from its altar, made of dead men's bones, and see what a flutterthere is in the camp, how new laws are made and old laws shoved aside, and new laws fixed over, and the highest and the lowest will lie andcringe and drag themselves on their knees in front of it to protect itand worship it. Don't talk to me about your wood idols; they hain'tnothin' to be compared to it. They stay where they're put, they don'trare round and kill their worshippers as this Whiskey idol duz. I'dthink enough sight more of some men high in authority if they wouldbuy a good clean basswood idol and put it up in the Capitol atWashington, D. C. , and kneel down before it three times a day, than todo what they are doin'; they wouldn't do half the hurt and God knowsit, and He would advise 'em that way if they ever got nigh enough toHim so's He could speak to 'em at all. " "Oh, Sister Arvilly!" sez Elder Wessel, and he looked as if he wouldfaint away. And I too wuz shocked to my soul, specially as Josiahwhispered kinder low to me: "Samantha, we might git a small idol whilst we're here. You know itwould come handy in hayin' time and when the roads are drifted full. " I looked at him in a way that he will remember through his hull life, and sez he quick, "I shan't do nothin' of the kind unless you'rewillin'. " "Willin'!" sez I, in heart-broken axents. "What will happen next tome?" And then indignation dried my tears before they fell and I sez, "I command you, Josiah Allen, to never speak to me on this subjectagin; or think on't!" sez I fiercely. He muttered sunthin' about thinkin' what he wuz a mindter. And Iturned to Arvilly and sez, to git her mind off: "See that native, Arvilly, standin' up on that board!" For as our good ship bore us onward we see crowds of natives standin'up on little tottlin' boards, dartin' through the water every whichway, risin' and fallin' on the waves. I couldn't done it to save mylife. No, Josiah nor me couldn't stood on boards like that on ourcreek, to say nothin' of the Pacific Ocean. But we should never haveappeared in public dressed in that way--it wuzn't decent, and I toldJosiah I wouldn't look at 'em if I wuz in his place; I mistrusted thatsome on 'em might be wimmen. And then I thought of the Garden of Eden, when Adam and Eve first took the place, and I didn't really know whatto think. But I drawed Arvilly's attention to one on 'em that seemedextra dextrious in managin' his board and sez, "How under the sun duzhe do it, Arvilly?" "I d'no, " sez she, and she added dreamily, "I wonder if he would wanta copy of the 'Twin Crimes, ' or the 'Wicked and Warlike. ' If I do sellany here to the natives it'll put some new idees in their heads aboutidol worship wickeder and warliker than they ever had. " Miss Meechimand Dorothy wuz approachin' and Robert Strong I see looked off withrapt eyes onto the glorious seen. And as no two can see the samethings in any picture, but see the idees of their own mind, blended inand shadin' the view, I spozed that Robert Strong see rared up on theforeground of that enchantin' seen his ideal City of Justice, wheregigantic trusts, crushin' the people's life out, never sot its feet, but love, equality and good common sense sot on their thrones in themiddle on't, and the people they ruled wuz prosperous and happy. Andanon he looked down into Dorothy's sweet face as if no foreign shoreor any inner vision ever looked so good to him. Miss Meechim hated to have Dorothy see them natives, I see she did;actin' so skittish towards the male sect always, it wuz dretfulgaldin' to her to see 'em in that state and specially to have Dorothysee 'em. She looked awful apprehensive towards them swimmers and boardriders and then at her niece. But when she catched sight of Robert byher side a look of warm relief swep' over her anxious face, as if inher mind's eye she see Dorothy by his help walkin' through the futurea prosperous and contented bacheldor maid. Tommy wuz kinder talkin' to himself or to his invisible playmate. Hewonnered how he wuz goin' to git on shore, wonnerin' if he could standup on one of them little boards and if his grandpa and grandma wouldeach have one to stand up on, and kinder lookin' forward to such anexperience I could see, and Josiah wuz wonderin' how soon he couldgit a good meat dinner. And so as on shore or sea each one wuz seein'what their soul's eye had to see, and shakin' ever and anon their ownparticular skeletons, and shettin' 'em up agin' in their breastclosets. Well, as we approached nigher and nigher the wharf we see men dressedin every way you could think on from petticoats to pantaloons, and menof every color from black down through brown and yeller to white, andwimmen the same. Well, it wuzn't long before we wuz ensconced in thecomfortable tarven where we put up. Elder Wessel and his daughter andEvangeline Noble went to the same tarven, which made me glad, for Ilike 'em both as stars differin'. Elder Wessel I regarded more as oneof the little stars in the Milky Way, but Evangeline as one of the bigradiant orbs that flashed over our heads in them tropic nights. The tarven we went to wuz called the Hawaiian Hotel. We got goodcomfortable rooms, Arvilly's bein' nigh to ourn and Dorothy's and MissMeechim's acrost the hall and the rest of the company comfortablylocated not fur away. Well, the next mornin' Josiah and I with Tommywalked through some of the broad beautiful streets, lined with housesbuilt with broad verandas most covered with vines and flowers andshaded by the most beautiful trees you ever see, tall palms with theirstems round and smooth as my rollin' pin piercin' the blue sky, andfur, fur up the long graceful leaves, thirty feet long some on 'em. And eucalyptus and begoniea and algebora with its lovely foliage, andpepper trees and bananas and pomegranates and tamarind and bread fruitand rose apples, tastin' and smellin' a good deal like a rosy. Andmagnificent oleanders and fuchias and geraniums and every otherbeautiful tree and blossom you ever hearn on. And take it with these rich colored posies and luxuriant green foliageand the white suits and hats of the men, and the gay colored clothingof the women we met, lots of them with wreaths of flowers round theirnecks hangin' most to their feet, take it all together it wuz a seenlong, long to be remembered. And then we walked up on Punch BowlHill, five hundred feet above the level of the sea, and looked off ona broad beautiful picture of sea, mountain and valley soft andbeautiful and a-bloom with verdure, and anon bold, rugged and sublime, and I sez to Josiah: "This very place where we're standin' now wuz once a volcano andbelched forth flames, and that also, " sez I, pintin' to Tantalus thatriz up two thousand feet. "And, " sez I, "they say that the view fromthat is glorious. " "Well, " sez he, "I guess we hadn't better climb up there; it mightbust out agin. And I wouldn't have you sot fire to, Samantha, for athousand worlds like this, " (he didn't want the work of climbin', thatwuz it). And I didn't argy with him, for I thought it would be quite apull for us to git up there and git Tommy up, and I didn't know as thechild ort to climb so fur, so I didn't oppose my pardner when hepropsed to go back to the tarven, and we santered back through thestreets filled with citizens of all countries and dressed accordin', to the grounds around the tarven. We put Tommy into a hammock and sotdown peaceful nigh by him. The sun shone down gloriously out of aclear blue sky, but we sot in the shade and so enjoyed it, the bammyair about us seemed palpitating with langrous beauty and fragrance, and I sez to my pardner: "Don't this remind you, Josiah, of what we've heard Thomas J. Readabout: "'The island valley of Avileon Where falls not rain nor hail nor any snow. '" "Where it seems always afternoon. " "I d'no, " sez Josiah, "as I ever hearn of such a land. I never wuz anyhand to lay abed all the forenoon. " "But, Josiah, there is sunthin' so dreamy and soothin', so restful inthe soft slumbrous atmosphere, it seems as if one could jest lay downin that hammock, look off onto the entrancin' beauty around, breathin' the soft balmy air, and jest lay there forever. " "I guess, " sez he, "that the dinner bell would be apt to roust you outthe second or third day. " But Miss Meechim jined us at jest this minute, and she sez to me, "Ifeel just as you do, I feel as though I would fain dwell hereforever. " And Josiah sez: "I believe it would be a good thing for you, MissMeechim, to stay here right along; you could probable do considerablegood here preachin' to the natives aginst marriage, they're pretty aptto marry too much if they're let alone, and you might curb 'em insome. " (Josiah can't bear Miss Meechim, her idees on matrimony arerepugnant to him. ) But she didn't argy with him. She sez: "Robert isplanning a trip to the Pali, and wants to know if you won't join us. " And Josiah says, "Who is Pali?" And she sez, "It is the precipice five hundred feet high, where KingKamehameha drove off his enemies. " Well, we wuz agreeable and jined the party. Robert had got a wagonetteand he and Dorothy, Miss Meechim and Arvilly and Josiah and I jestfilled the seats, Tommy sot in Josiah's lap or between us. It is quite a long ride to the Pali, but we didn' realize it, becausethe scenery all along is so lovely and so novel. That view from thetop I hain't a-goin' to try to describe, nor I sha'n't let Josiah try;I don't like to have that man flat out in his undertakin's. Good land!do you want us to tell how many sands there wuz on the flashing whitebeach that stretched out milds and milds? And we might as well as todescribe that enchantin' panorama and take up all the differentthreads of glory that lay before us and embroider 'em on language. No, you must see 'em for yourself, and then you hain't goin' to describe'em. I d'no but Carabi could. I hearn Tommy talkin' and "wonnerin'" tohim as he stood awestruck beside me, but no mortal can. Well, I thought I must not slight the volcano Kilauea, which means theHouse of Everlasting Fire. And how that volcano and everything inHawaii reminded me of the queen who once rained here--and theinterview I once had with her. We happened to be visitors to the samesummer resort. You know she lives in Washington, D. C. , now. I sent word that I wuz there and craved a augence, which wuz gladlygranted. She had hearn of me and I had hearn of her, which madeeverything agreeable. So at the appinted hour I wuz ushered by one ofher hired men into her presence. I liked her looks first rate; ofcourse she hain't what you may call handsome, and her complection ispretty middlin' dark, but she has a good look and a good way with her. She came forward and greeted me with great cordiality and gin the handI extended a warm grasp, and I hern visey versey, and sez she: "I am glad to see you, Josiah Allen's wife. " And I sez, speakin' thename Liliukolani well as I could, "I also am glad to hail the Queen ofthe Sandwich Islands. " That tickled her, and she sez: "I was not deceived in you; you are onewho can recognize royalty if the cloud of adversity and trouble iswreathin' it in its black folds. " And I sez, "Clouds often covers the sun and moon, but the light isthere jest the same. " I felt to pity her as she went on and relatedher troubles to me. Her throne kicked out from under her by them thatwanted to set down on it, the high chairs of her loyal friends took byher enemies who craved the soft cushions. Even her private propertygrabbed away from her. Why, how should any of us feel to have aneighbor walk in when we wuz havin' a family quarrel and jest clean usout of everything--kitchen stove, bureau, bed and beddin' andeverything; why, it would rile us to our depths, any on us. She sez, "I feel that my kingdom wuz stole away from me. " And I sez: "I know jest how you feel. There wuz a woodsy island down in ourcreek that Josiah had called hisen for years and years, rainedpeaceful and prosperous over so we spozed, it made a dretful handyplace for our young stock to stand in the shade in the summer, and ourducks and geese jest made their hum there, but what should Bill Yerdendo when he bought the old Shelmadine place but jest scoop up thatisland and try to prove that it wuz hisen. It wuz jest stealin', Josiah and I always felt so. But he wuz down with tizik at the time, and I wore out nussin' him, and Bill put bob iron fence round it, realsharp bobs, too, and we had to gin in. Of course it wuzn't a big spot, but we despised the idee of havin' it took from us just as much asthough it wuz the hull contient of Asia, and we can't git over it, Josiah nor me can't. And I know jest how you feel, and I sympathizewith you. " And she sez, "Sympathy is sweet, but justice is sweeter. " And I sez, "That is so, but when you can't git justice, sympathy isbetter than nothin'. " "Yes, " sez she, "I know it, but I am lookin' forward to the day when Ishall git my rights agin. I am jest as much a queen as Queen Alexandrais to-day, and my kingdom is just as much mine. " Sez I, "That is just the way Josiah and I feel; we can't help lookin'forward to gittin' our rights, but don't spoze we ever shall, for lifeis short, and Josiah don't want any more of our live stock tore up onthem bobs; and, as I've said to Josiah many a time, Bill Yerden feelsguilty, or he wouldn't rare up such sharp defences round it. " Well, we had a good deal more of jest such profitable and interestin'talk as two such great wimmen would naterally, and we parted away fromeach other with a cordial hand shake and mutual good feelin'. But shecalled me back and sez she: "I want to give you one word of solemnwarnin' before we part, " and I stopped stun still and listened. "I don't know, " sez she, "as you'll ever be a queen. " "Well, mebby not, " sez I, "but I am thought a sight on in Jonesville, and there is no knowin' what may happen. " "Well, " sez she, "if you ever are a queen, a ruler of a kingdom, don'tlet any other nation protect you. Protectin', " sez she, "has been theruin of more than one individual and nation. " And I promised her that I would look out for it if I ever wuz a queen, but reminded her that there wuz times too when it came handy, andsaved our necks to be protected, and then I finished, gracefullybackin' out of her presence. I like her first rate, and believe she isa likely woman; I believe she has been lied about, she jest the sameas told me she had; if she wuz a woman that took in washin's for alivin' there wouldn't have been so much said about her. Why, it isjest as easy for envious folks to run them high in position and try todemean 'em as it is to fall off a log. CHAPTER X Some of the party felt that they couldn't leave the islands withoutseein' the great Kilauea and some didn't care to go. I felt that Imust see it and so did Arvilly, and Josiah looked on me as fondly andproudly as if I myself wuz a volcano and said, "If Samantha goes Ishall. " Robert Strong wanted to go and so did Dorothy; Miss Meechimdidn't feel like going and offered to take care of Tommy with the helpof Aronette. Elder Wessel wouldn't go, for Lucia wuzn't very well andhe felt that she had better stay and rest at the tarven, and I spozedthat Aronette and Lucia would have a pretty good time, for they alwaysseemed to when they wuz together. Evangeline Noble was visiting somefriends of hers on the island. There wuz a smart young Englishclergyman goin' with us and a Scotchman, both good lookin' and goodactin'. The Scotchman wuz Sir Duncan Ramsey and didn't act any moresot up than if he wuz a plain mister. He paid considerable attentionto Dorothy, too, but Miss Meechim said that she didn't worry aboutDorothy at all since I would chaperone her, and Robert wuz going toprotect her from any possible lover. Sez Miss Meechim: "Robert knows that I would almost rather have that volcano burst forthits burning lava and wash her away on its bosom than to have herengulfed in that terrible state of matrimony from which I and minehave suffered so horribly. " "Well, " sez I, "I can't speak for you and yourn, but for me and ourn, "sez I, "no state under the heavens would be agreeable for me to livein if my beloved pardner wuzn't in it too. " "Oh, well, " sez she, "exceptions prove the rule; your husband iscongenial and good to you. " "Oh, well, " sez I, "as to the daily acts and queer moves of pardnersthe least said the soonest mended, but Love is the great ruler; wherehe rules any state is blest, be it torrid or frigid. " That evenin' Arvilly and Elder Wessel had a argument about votin' andother things. I knew I ort to be in my room packin' my satchel bag, for we expected to be gone a week or ten days, but I did kinder wantto hear how their talk come out. He said he didn't vote; he said hethought it wuz a clergyman's duty to set and judge of the right andwrong of actions, not take part in 'em. And Arvilly says, "I always spozed the Almighty did that; I didn'tknow as human men wuz obleeged to. I know he cursed them that dealt instrong drink, and blest them that gin even a cup of cold water to thelittle ones, which I spoze meant help to the poorest and lowest. And Iguess that whatever your idees are about it, when you come to thejudgment day you won't set up there on the throne judgin', but you'llbe down with the rest on us givin' an account of how you've used yourtalents, your influence, and if you've wropped your mantilly ofprotection around thieves and murderers that you know the whiskeytrade is made of; you'll find that it will drop off there, and youwill be judged accordin' to your works. But mebby you'll be made tosee before you git there that you're in the wrong on't upholdin' thisevil. " Arvilly's axent wuz as sharp as any simeter, and it seemed to go rightthrough Elder Wessel's robe of complacency and self-esteem and rendit. He looked dretful bad, and I spoke up, meanin' to pour a littleile on his woonds, and sayin' what I thought, too. Sez I: "Folks hain't so guilty often as they are thoughtless; ministers andchurch people who don't use their influence aginst this evil don'trealize what they're doin'--they don't think. " "They're guilty if they don't think, " sez Arvilly, "if they are blestwith common sense. If I wuz walkin' by a deep pond in broad daylight, and see a dozen little children sinking that I might save by a littleeffort, I wonder how many would believe me when I said that I see 'emdrowndin' but didn't try to save 'em because I didn't think. If I hadears and eyes and common sense, and could save 'em and didn't, I wuzguilty of murder, and so the Lord would look at it and everybody elsethat knew anything. " And she looked at me some as if I didn't knowanything, jest because I intimated that ministers and church membersdidn't want to do such wickedness, but didn't think--Arvilly is hash. But I had to admit that she had some common sense on her side. Sez sheagin: "The Church of Christ could do anything it wanted to if it jined itsforces, took holt as if it meant to do sunthin', but as it isindifference folds its hands, self interest murders humanity, greedupholds intemperance, and all about us in Church and State are drinkmakers and drink takers, and heaven knows which of 'em will git tohell first!" Arvilly is dretful hash; when she gits rousted up herindignation is like lightnin', and she don't care where it strikes orwho. It struck Elder Wessel hard. "I should be afraid!" sez he, and his voice fairly trembled withindignation, "I should be afraid to talk of the Church of Christ asyou do!" "Let it behave itself then!" sez Arvilly, "be converted and come outon the Lord's side to the help of the weak aginst the mighty!" "The saloon, " sez Elder Wessel dogmatically, "is the Poor Man's Club. "He wuz all rousted up by her hash talk and come out plainer than hehad come. "The rich man has his club, and the saloon is the Poor Man'sClub. He has a right to go there for a little recreation. " "Re-creation!" sez Arvilly. "If you think drinkin' pizen whiskey isre-creatin' a man, you're different from me. " "And me, too, " sez I. "If you call it re-creatin' to go to the PoorMan's Club sober and sane, " sez Arvilly, "and stagger home at midnightcrazy drunk, I say he hain't no right to re-create himself that way;he re-creates himself from a good man and worthy member of societyinto a fiend, a burden and terror to his family and community. NowElder White's idee of re-creatin' men is different; he believes intakin' bad men and re-creatin' 'em into good ones, and I wish thatevery minister on earth would go and do likewise. " "I know nothin' about Elder White, " sez Elder Wessel hautily. "He's our minister in Loontown, " sez Arvilly. "He has his church openevery night in the week for re-creatin' in the right way. " "I don't approve of that, " sez Elder Wessel. "The church of the MostHigh is too sacred to use for such purposes. " "A minister said that once to Elder White, " sez Arvilly, "and heanswered 'em with that warm meller smile of hisen, 'Where are my boysand girls more welcome and safe than at home, and this is theirFather's house, '" sez he. "Using that holy place for recreation is very wrong, " sez ElderWessel. Sez Arvilly, "I told you that he used it to re-create anew to goodnessand strength. He has music, good books, innocent games of all kinds, bright light, warmth, cheerful society, good lectures, and anatmosphere of good helpful influences surroundin' 'em, and he hassandwiches and coffee served in what wuz the pastor's study, and whichhe uses now, Heaven knows, to study the big problem how a minister ofthe Most High can do the most good to his people. " "Coffee, " sez Elder Wessel, "is all right in its place, but the commonworkman hankers after something stronger; he wants his beer or toddy, the glass that makes him forget his trouble for a time, and lifts himinto another world. " "Well, I spoze the opium eater and cocaine fiend hanker after the foolparadise these drugs take 'em into, but that's no sign that they ortto destroy themselves with 'em. " "Coffee, too, is deleterious, " sez Elder Wessel. "Some say that it isworse than whiskey. " I spoke up then; I am a good coffee maker, everybody admits, and Icouldn't bear to hear Ernest White talked aginst, and I sez: "I neverhearn of a workman drinkin' so much coffee that he wuz a danger to hisfamily and the community, or so carried away with it that he spent hishull wages on it. Such talk is foolish and only meant to blind theeyes of justice and common sense. Elder White's Mutual Help Club, ashe calls it, for he makes these folks think they help him, and mebbythey do, is doin' sights of good, sights of it. Young folks who wuzwell started towards the drunkard's path have been turned right roundby it, and they save their wages and look like different men sincethey have left the Poor Man's Club, as you call it, and patronizehisen. " "And Elder White has showed, " sez Arvilly, "by his example just whatthe Church of Christ could do if it wanted to, to save men from theevil of this present time and git 'em headed towards the CelestialCity. " "Oh!" sez Elder Wessel, "I would no more use the church dedicated tothe Most High in the way you speak of than I would use the communioncup to pass water in. " "If a man wuz dyin' of thirst, and that cup could be used to save him, don't you spoze the Lord would want it used for that, Elder Wessel?"sez Arvilly. "Oh, no! oh, no!" sez he: "give not that which is holy unto dogs; castnot your pearls before swine. " "That is jest what I have been preachin' to you, " sez Arvilly. "Givenot that which is holy, the best nater, and goodness of boys and mento the dogs, the brutes that lay in wait for 'em in whiskey laws. TheGod in man is murdered every 'lection day by professors of religionand ministers. " "Why--whyee, " sez Elder Wessel, sinkin' back in his chair. "Yes, " sez the dantless Arvilly, "I mean jest what I say; them thatrefuse to vote and help in the matter are jest as guilty as licensevoters; they are consentin' to the crucifixion of Christ in man. Andthe poor drunkards are not the only ones they help nail to the cross. The innocent life and happiness of wimmen and children these wickedlaws lift up on the cross of agony, and their hearts' blood cries toheaven for judgment on them that might have helped 'em and would not. The Church of Christ is responsible for this crime, " sez Arvilly, "forthere is not an evil on earth that could stand before the combinedstrength of a united church. " Sez Elder Wessel, gittin' back considerable dignity (her hash talkmadded him awfully), sez he, "I simply see things in another lightfrom what you do. " "He that is not for me is against me, " sez Arvilly. Sez the Elder in a dogmatic axent, real doggy it wuz, "I say again, the saloon is the Poor Man's Club. " And I sez dreamily, "Talkin' of a club as a club, a club in the handsof a drunken man, strikin' at and destroyin' all the safety andhappiness of a home, yes, " sez I, "it is such a club. " "Yes, " sez Arvilly, "if poundin' his wife to jelly, and his childrento deformity and death, is a Poor Man's Club, the saloon is one. " Sez he agin, "Rich men have their clubs to which they may go, anddrink all they choose--carouse, do as they please, and why not poormen, too?" he added. And I sez, "Grantin' that rich men do drink and carouse at theirclubs, as I don't know whether they do or not, two wrongs never madeone right, and the liquor couldn't hurt 'em so much, for they can buyit pure, and the poor man's drink is pizen by adulteration, makin' amore dangerous drunk, ruinin' their health and makin' 'em spilin' forfights and bloodshed. The rich man can stay all night at his club, orif he goes home the decorous butler or vally can tend to him andprotect his family if need be; he won't stagger in at midnight to acomfortless room, where his wife and little ones are herded in coldand starvation and are alone and at his mercy, and the rich man'scarouse at his club won't keep his wife and children hungry for aweek. " Bein' driv out of that position Elder Wessel tried a new tact: "Thepoor man has just as much right to the social enjoyment they git outof their saloon as you have, madam, to your afternoon teas and churchsocials. " "What hinders the poor man from 'tendin' socials?" sez Arvilly, spiritedly. "They are always bein' teased to, and anyway I never knewtea to make anybody crazy drunk. " "The poor man, " sez Elder Wessel in his most dictorial way, all ofArvilly's talk havin' slipped offen him like rain water offen a brasshorn, "the poor man, after he has worked hard all day, and has nothingto go home to but a room full of cryin' children, discomfort, squalorand a complaining wife, is justified in my opinion to go to the onlybright, happy place he knows of, the saloon. " But I sez, bein' such a case for justice, "How is it with the wife whohas worked hard all day in the home of discomfort and squalor, herwork being rendered ten times harder and more nerve destroying thanher husband's by the care of the cryin' children, how would it be forthem, who are equally responsible for the marriage and the children, to take holt together and make the children happier and the home lessfull of discomfort?" "Yes, " sez Arvilly, "is it goin' to make the home less full ofdiscomfort to have him reel home at midnight and dash the hungrycryin' baby aginst the wall and put out its feeble life, and mebbykill the complainin' wife too?" "Oh, those are extreme cases and uncommon, " sez Elder Wessel. "Not oncommon at all, " sez Arvilly. "If you read the daily papers youwill see such things as this, the direct work of the saloon, arecontinually occurring, too common in fact to attract much attention. " He couldn't deny this, for he knew that we read the papers jest thesame as he did, and the fact that he couldn't deny it seemed to kindertire him, and he sez, getting up: "I guess I will go and smoke a cigar. " And he went. And I went up tomy room, too, to pack my satchel bag, for we expected to start thevery next mornin' and to be gone about a week or ten days. Well, the steamer took us to Hilo, and the panorama that swep' by uson that steamer can't never be reproduced by any camera or kodak; thesapphire blue water, the hills standing like mountains of beaten goldand velvety green verdure, and beyond the soft blue and purplemountain ranges, agin deep clefts and cliffs of richest colored rockswith feathery white waterfalls floating down on 'em like a veil, anonpleasant landscapes, sugar cane plantations, picturesque houses, windmills, orchards, dancing brooks and broad green fields. Nodissolvin' view wuz ever so entrancin', but like all others it had todissolve. We reached Hilo the second day and we all went to a comfortabletarven, and the next mornin' bright and early we sot off on the stagefor the volcano over, I state, and state it fearlessly, the mostbeautiful road that wuz ever built towards any volcano or anythingelse. Why, I've thought that the road between Jonesville and Loontownwuz beautiful and easy travellin'. Old Hagadone is path-master andvain of the road, and calls the men out twice a year to pay poll taxesand such by workin' it. Sugar maples, elder bushes, and shuemakes, andwild grapes and ivy run along the side of the stun wall, makin' it, Ialways had thought, on-approachable in beauty. But, good land! if oldHagadone had seen that road he would have turned green as grass withenvy. Imagine a wide road, smooth as glass, cut right out of a glowingtropical forest with a almost onimagined splendor, that I spoze wasmeant to be onseen by mortal eyes, risin' up on each side on't. Why, I've been as proud as a peacock of my little hibiscus growin' ingrandma Allen's old teapot, and when that blowed out one little blow Icalled the neighbors in to witness the gorgeous sight. Imagine ahibiscus tree, as big as one of our biggest maples, fairly burnin' allover with the gorgeous blossoms, and bananas with their great glossyleaves, and lantannas. Wuzn't I proud of my lantanna growin' in MaSmith's blue sugar bowl? I thought it wuz a lovely sight when it hadthree blows on it at one time. But imagine milds and milds of 'emrisin' up thirty feet on each side of the road, and little spindlin'palms, that we envy if growin' two feet high, growin' here to ahundred feet or more, and begonias and geraniums growin' up into talltrees and of every color, tuberoses and magnolias loadin' the air withfragance, the glossy green of the ohia tree with the iaia vineclimbing and racing over it all, mingled in with tamarind and orangesand bamboo, and oleanders with their delicious pink and whiteblossoms. Sez I: "Do you remember my little oleander growin' in a sapbucket, Josiah? Did you ever think of seein' 'em growin' fifty feethigh? What a priceless treasure one would be in Jonesville. " And he whispered back real voyalent: "Don't think, Samantha, ofgittin' me to lug one of them fifty-foot trees all the way hum. I'vebroke my back for years luggin' round your old oleander in a tub, butnever will I tackle one of them trees, " and he looked up defiantlyinto the glossy boughs overhead. "I hain't asked you to, Josiah, but, " sez I dreamily: "I would love togit some slips of them fuchia and begonia trees, and that jasmine, "sez I, pintin' up to the emerald waves of foliage enriched by them Ihave named, and as many other glowin' with perfume and beauty asthere are stars in the heavens, or so it seemed to me. Sez I: "What ashow I could make in Jonesville with 'em. " Sez I: "What would MissBobbett and Sister Henzy say if they could see 'em?" And I pinted upat a gigantick trumpet creeper and convolvuli, festooned along theboughs of a giant geranium and hanging down its banner of bloom. "They'd say, let well enough alone. I tell you I can't break up mytrip diggin' dirt and tendin' to a lot of houseplants from Dan toBeersheba. " "We're not goin' to Dan, " sez I, "and if we wuz a man might meet Dandoin' worse than pleasin' his pardner. Look at that jasmine, " sez I. "Is that much like that little slip of Sister Bobbett's growin' in atea-cup? And see! oh, do see, Josiah, them night bloomin' ceriuses!Oh, take it on a moonlight night, the walls of fragrant green oneither side, and them lovely blows, hundreds and thousands of 'emshinin' out like stars of whiteness, full of the odor of Paradise. Oh, what a sight, Josiah Allen, for us to see!" And he sez, "Don't git any idee, Samantha, of you and me comin' wayback here by moonlight, for we can't do it. The road is thirty mildslong, and if we tried it we shouldn't git here till they had doneblowin'. " "I hain't no idee of tryin' it, Josiah, I wuz only revellin' in theidee of what the glory of the sight must be. " "Well, " sez he, "I am revellin' in the idee of havin' a good meatdinner if we ever git to Hilo. " And he added with a sarcastick smile, "Don't that make you think of poker? High, low--all it wants is Jackand the Game. " I gin him a stern look and sez, "Some knowledge is demeanin' to aperfessor. " And he acted puggicky and didn't say another word for amild or so. But I sot calm and looked away into the entrancin' seen. And all the time we wuz rollin' on towards the volcano. Robert and Dorothy seemed to be enjoying the seen as much as I did, and Arvilly wuz tryin' to canvass the Scotchman. The Englishman hadalready bought the "Twin Crimes, " and so she wuz as happy as she everwould be, I spozed. Well, after that long enchantin' ride through Paradise, at last wereached the place we wuz bound for and put up to the Volcano House, from which a good view of the volcano is seen at night, but nothin' towhat it is to stand on its shores. Well, I will pass over allintervenin' incidents, some as the lava duz when it gits started, anddraw the curtain on us agin as we stood in front of that awful, majestic, dretful, sublime, unapproachable, devilish, glorious--athousand times glorious--and not to be forgot till death, sight. Tongue can't utter words to describe it; the pen hain't made, the egghain't laid to hatch out the soarin' eagle whose feathers could bewrought into a pen fittin' to describe that seen. Why, I have thoughtwhen the mash got to burnin' down to the lake it wuz a grand sight;Jonesvillians have driv milds to see it. I have seen upwards of tenacres of the mash burnin' over at one time, and felt awestruck, and sodid Sister Bobbett, for we went down together once with our pardnerson a buckboard. But, sez I to myself almost instinctively: "What if Sister Bobbett wuz here? What would she say?" Imagine a great lake of fire instead of water, waves of burning lavadashing up onto its shores, bustin' way up in the air at times, towerin' pillers of flame, swishin' and swashin', fire and flames, andbrimstun for all I know. What--what wuz goin' on way down in thedepths below if this wuz the seen outside? So wildly I questioned myheart and Josiah. "Oh, Josiah!" sez I, "what--what a sight! Did I everexpect to witness such a seen? No, oh no, " I sez. "What do you spozeis goin' on inside of that great roarin', blazin' monster?" Sez he, "Iknow what's goin' on inside of me; I know I am jest starvin', faintin'away fur want of food. " "Well, " sez I soothin'ly, "when we get back to the Volcano House Iwill ask for some bread and milk for you. " "Bread and milk!" sez he bitterly. "I want pork and beans, and ham, and biled greens, and chicken pie and Injun puddin'!" "Well, well, " sez I, "be calm. Do jest see them great waves and fieldsof lava, milds and milds of 'em, once jest melted fire, rollin' on androllin' on--what a sight!" sez I. On one side wuz a sort of a highterrace, over which the fiery flames had fell and hardened into solidwaves lookin' some as our Niagara would look if her flowin' watersshould suddenly harden as they flowed. I pinted it out to Arvilly, whowuz by my side. Sez I, "Do look at that! It seems as if Nater had jesthung up that stupendous sheet there and writ on it the word Glory!Unapproachable glory and magesty!" Sez Arvilly dreamily, "If I could jest dig out in that smooth lava thewords, 'The Twin Crimes of America--Intemperance and Greed, ' and trainthe volcano to run blazin' fire into the mould, what a advertisementthat would be for my book, or for the 'Wild, Wicked and Warlike Deedsof Man. ' It would help the sale of both on 'em tremendously. " And I sez, "Don't try to train no volcanos, Arvilly; you would findthem worse to handle than any man you ever tackled. " "Well, " sez she dreamily, "I believe it could be done. " Robert Strong and Dorothy stood clost together, he a-protectin' her, as I spozed. 'Tennyrate he seemed dretful careful where she steppedand how and when, and she looked up real confidin' and sweet into hisface, and then, awestruck and wonder smit, down into the burnin' lakebelow. The Englishman and Scotchman had gone on a little nigher to it, with the guide. Hale-mau-mau (House of Endless Fire), well did thenatives name it. Well, it wuz long before we tore ourselves from thesublime seen, and I dremp of it all night. I see Josiah bore from meon the lava flood, and then agin I wuz swep' from him and dashed up ona billow of flame, and visey versey, versey visey. I had a dretfulnight, and got up twice and looked out of the winder on the grandspectacle. But towards mornin' I had a beautiful vision: my pardnerand me wuz bore back to Jonesville, and sot in our own door yard undera spreadin' geranium tree, and Sister Bobbett stood admirin'ly beforeme with a tea-cup in her hand, beggin' for a slip from the immensebranches. It wuz a sweet dream, and I waked up refreshed. CHAPTER XI Well, one week later we found ourselves agin on the boundless deep, the broad Pacific, bound for the Philippines. How fur off fromJonesville did I seem as I thought on't, but Love journeyed with me, and Duty. Tommy wuz gittin' fat and rosy, his cough grew better everyday, and he looked and acted like a different child. This wuz to be a longer voyage than we had took. We layed out to stopto the Philippines first, and so on to China and Japan. It beats allhow soon you settle down and seem to feel as if the great ship you areembarked on is the world, and the little corner you occupy your home, specially if you have a devoted pardner with you to share your corner, for Love can make a home anywhere. Arvilly got a number of newsubscribers and made friends amongst the passengers, but Elder Wesselavoided her. And he didn't seem to like Sister Evangeline. I told himwhat I had seen and hearn, for it seemed to me like a olive branchbore into our dark, rainy world by a dove of Paradise. But he scoffedat it; he said that it wuz all imagination. But I sez: "It hain'timagination that the poor woman wuz dyin' and Sister Evangeline savedher. " And he said that wuz a coincidence, and I said that it wuz apity there wuzn't more such coincidences. And he didn't answer me atall. He wuz settin' up on his creed with his legs hangin' off, and hesot straight, no danger of his gittin' off and goin' down amongst thepoor steerage passengers and helpin' 'em. He thought he wuz a eminentChristian, but in my opinion he might have been converted over aginwithout doin' him any harm. Well, the big world we wuz inhabitin' moved on over the calm waters. Josiah read a good deal, settin' in the library with Tommy on hisknee. And I read some myself, but took considerable comfort studyin'the different passengers, some as if they wuz books with differentbindin's, some gilt and gay, some dull and solid and some sombry, buteach with different readin' inside. And stiddy and swift, onheedin' any of our feelin's or fears, thegreat ship ploughed on, takin' us towards that wuz comin' to meet usonbeknown to us. Miss Meechim kep' up pretty well, keepin' a goodlookout on Dorothy, but restin' her mind on Robert Strong'sprotection, and Robert and Dorothy seemed to enjoy themselves betterand better all the time, singing together, and walking up and down thedeck for hours on pleasant days and matchless nights lit with thebrilliant light of moon and star, and Southern Cross, and I didn'tknow what other light might be shinin' on 'em onbeknown to MissMeechim, but mistrusted by me. Elder Wessel, when we wuz with Lucia, didn't seem to want anythingelse on earth. She wuz a pretty girl, but I could see that she wuzvery romantic; she had read sights of novels, and wuz lookin' out forsome prince in disguise to ride up on a white charger to carry her offand share his throne. But I could see that if the right influences wuzthrowd around her she had the makin' of a noble woman in her, and Ihoped she would grow up a good, helpful woman. She had a greatinfluence over Aronette, whose nater wuz more yieldin' and gentle, andI didn't altogether approve of their intimacy, but considered that itwould be broke off pretty quick, as they would part for good and allwhen we got to China. You may wonder why I worried about Aronette;well, the reason wuz, I loved her, jest as everybody else did who knewher well. She wuz a darling girl, always sweet tempered, always tryingto help somebody; Dorothy loved her just as much as though she wuz hersister and would have treated her exactly like one if it hadn't beenfor Miss Meechim. She loved Aronette herself, and showed her love byher goodness, buying her everything she needed and didn't need, butshe wuz so hauty naturally that she insisted on Aronette's keepin' herplace, as she said. And she was so sweet dispositioned and humblesperited she didn't want to do any different. Well, I spoze MissMeechim wuz right; if Aronette wuz Dorothy's maid it wuzn't to beexpected that she would take her visitin' with her, and it wuzAronette's delight to wait on Dorothy as devotedly as if no ties oflove bound their young hearts together. Robert Strong liked andrespected her, I spoze mebby on Dorothy's account, and Tommy adoredher; why, even Josiah felt towards her, he said, some as if she wuzTirzah Ann growed young agin. Arvilly's heart she won completely by makin' her a bag to carry the"Twin Crimes" in. It wuz made of handsome black silk, worked all roundin pink silk in a handsome pattern, and she had worked on one side inbig letters, "The Twin Crimes of America, Intemperance and Greed. " Arvilly almost cried with joy when she gin it to her, and sez to me, "That Aronette is the best girl in the hull world and the sweetest. Look at that embroidery, " sez she, holdin' up the handsome bag beforemy eyes, "you can see that as fur as you can see me; that bag alone isenough to sell the book, and I wuz jest wearin' out the agent's copy. There hain't anything in the world I wouldn't do for that girl. " Yes, we all loved her dearly, and a dozen times a day we would say to eachother what should we ever do without Aronette. Josiah wuz seasick some, but not nigh so bad as he thought, and Tommykept well and happy all the time, and wonnered and wonnered ateverything and seemed to take comfort in it, and he would set in hislittle chair on deck and talk to Carabi for hours, and I d'no whetherCarabi wuz enjoyin' the trip or not; I didn't seem to have any way ofknowin'. One day Tommy and I wuz lookin' off on the broad blue watersand we see approachin' what looked like a boat with its tiny sail set. It looked so like a boat set out from fairyland that instinctively Ithought of Carabi, but a passenger standin' by said that it wuz aNautilus, and afterwards we see lots of 'em. And the Southern Crossbent over us nights as if to uphold our souls with the thought thatour heavenly gardeen would take care on us. And some nights the seawuz lit up with phosphorescent light into a seen of glory that I can'tdescribe and hain't goin' to let Josiah try to; I hain't a goin' tohave that man made light of, and Shakespeare couldn't do justice toit. Low down over our heads the heavens leaned, the glassy watersaspired upward in sparks of flame. The south wind whispered soft, strange secrets to us, sweeping up from the misty horizon. Our soulslistened--but shaw! I said I wuzn't goin' to try to describe the gloryand I hain't. And the ship sailed on. One evenin' there wuz another steamer sighted, most everybody wuz on deck. Sister Evangeline wuz down takin' care ofthat poor woman and child and the fever patients; Tommy wuz asleep;Josiah wuz readin' the old newspaper he had wropped his clothes in, and which he had treasured fondly. He wuz readin' the advertisements, Help Wanted and such. I asked him what good them advertisements woulddo him ten thousand milds from hum, but he said no knowin' what mighthappen and anything in the paper wuz good readin'. That man's blind adherence to party has caused me many a forebodin', it is a menace to good government and public safety, and I have toldhim so. Well, I santered down into the cabin and there I found ElderWessel all alone. He had jest been readin' a powerful editorial thatcoincided with his views exactly, and he leaned back and put a thumbin each arm-hole of his vest and sez: "What a glorious work the United States is doin' here in thePhilippines. " And I sez, "Yes, that is so, the United States is doin' a great andnoble work in educating and civilizing the natives, if it wuzn't forthe one great mistake she is making and duz make wherever she plantsher banner in a new country amongst a new people. "Side by side with her schoolhouses and churches that are trying tolift humanity heavenward the American Saloon is found loweringhumanity and undoing the work these ministers and teachers have sofaithfully tried to do. " I guess he didn't hear me, but 'tennyrate he went right on: "Oh, yes, oh, yes, our Christian nation goes to these benighted islands, carrying Christianity and civilization in its hand. Of course theymay not ever come up to the hite of our own perfect, matchlesscivilization, but they will approach it, they will approach it. " Sez Arvilly: "Our nation won't come up to them in years and years, ifit ever duz!" He jumped as if he had been shot; he thought we wuz alone, and sez:"Why--why, Sister Arvilly--you must admit these savages are behind usin knowledge. " "So much the worse for us; the sin of ignorance is goin' to be winkedat, but if we know better we ort to do better. " Elder Wessel wuzstunted, but he murmured instinctively sunthin' about our carryin' theBible and the knowledge of heaven to 'em. Arvilly snapped out: "What good will that do if we carry private hellsto burn 'em up before they die? A pretty help that is! What is the useof teachin' 'em about heaven if our civilization makes sure the firstthing it duz to keep 'em out of it, for no drunkard shall inheritheaven. What's the use of gittin' 'em to hankerin' after sunthin' theycan't have. " The Elder wuz almost paralyzed, but he murmured instinctively sunthin'about our duty to the poor naked heathen hanging like monkeys from thetree tops, like animals even in their recreation. And Arvilly bein' sorousted up and beyend reasonable reason, sez: "That's their biznessabout not bein' clothed, and anyway it is jest as the Lord startedthe human race out in the Garden of Eden, and they do wear enough tocover their nakedness, and that's more than some of our fashionablewimmen do, and 'tennyrate they don't suffer so much as our wimmen dowith their torturin' tight shoes and steel instruments of agony boundround their waists, compressin' their vital organs into a mass ofdeformity. " Elder Wessel wuz so browbeat that he kinder got offen his subject, andwith a dazed look he murmured sunthin' about "the wicked religion ofCuba when the Americans took it--the Papal indulgences, the cruel bullfights, the national recreations--you could always tell the low stateof a nation's civilization by the brutish recreations they indulgedin. " Sez Arvilly, in a loud, mad axent, "Talk about brutal amusements, whythey ort to send missionaries to America to reform us as fur up indecency as to use animals to fight fur our recreation instead of humanbein's. Bulls hain't spozed to have immortal souls, and think howAmerica pays two men made in the image of God so much an hour--highwages, too--to beat and pound and maim and kill each other for theamusement of a congregation of Christian men and wimmen, who set andapplaud and howl with delight when a more cruel blow than common fellsone on 'em to the earth. And then our newspapers fight it all over forthe enjoyment of the family fireside, for the wimmen and children andinvalids, mebby, that couldn't take in the rare treat at first sight. Every blow, every cruel bruise that wuz made in the suffering fleshreproduced for Sunday reading. And if one of the fighters is killedand his mangled body taken out of the fighting ring forever, takenhome to his wife and children with the comfortin' peticulars that hewuz killed for the amusement of men and wimmen, most on 'em churchmembers, and all citizens of our Christian republic by special licenseof the government, why then the newspapers, which are the exponents ofour civilization and the teachers of our youth, have a splendid timerelating the ghastly story under staring headlines. After all this, talk to me about our country's dastin to have the face to reform anyother country's amusement. Our prize fights that our nation giveslicenses for its people to enjoy are as much worse than bull fights, in view of America's professions of goodness, as it would be for anangel to fly down 'lection day amongst a drunken crowd and git drunkas a fool, and stagger round and act with her wings dirty anda-floppin'. " Elder Wessel wuz took completely back, I could see, by Arvilly'seloquence, and I wuz myself. The sharp-toothed harrow of grief hadturned up new furrows in her soul, in which strange plants growed. Andbefore Elder Wessel could speak she went on a-thinkin' back aboutsunthin' he'd said. "Indulgences to sin! If I granted licenses for all kinds of sin formoney, as our nation duz, I wouldn't talk about Papal indulgences. Seehow wimmen are used--embruted, insulted, ground beneath the heel oflust and ruin by these same license laws. " "But, Sister Arvilly, " sez he, "I was reading only this morning asermon upon how much our civilization had to do in lifting women intothe high place they occupy to-day. " "High place!" sez Arvilly, and I fairly trembled in my shoes to hearher axent. "Wimmen occupy a dretful high place. I can tell you jestthe place she occupies. You have been told of it often enough; you ortto know it, but don't seem to. A woman occupies the same bench withlunatics, idiots and criminals, only hern is enough sight harder underlegal licenses and taxation laws. " "But, " sez the Elder, "the courtesy with which women are treated, thepoliteness, the deference----" "If you wuz kicked out of your meetin' house, Elder Wessel, would itmake any difference to you whether the shue you wuz kicked with wuzpatent leather or cowhide? The important thing to you would be thatyou wuz layin' on the ground outside, and the door locked behindyou. " Sez Elder Wessel, "That is a strong metafor, Sister Arvilly. I hadnever looked at it in that light before. " "I presume so, " sez she. "The very reason why there are so manycryin' abuses to-day is because good men spend their strength inwritin' eloquent sermons aginst sin, and lettin' it alone, insteadof grapplin' with it at the ballot box. Our Lord took a whip andscourged the money changers out of the temple. And that is whatministers ort to do, and have got to do, if the world is savedfrom its sins--scourge the money changers who sell purity and honor, true religion and goodness for money. "Satan don't care how much ministers talk about temperance andgoodness and morality in the pulpit to a lot of wimmen and childrenthat the congregations are made up of mostly, or how many essays arewrit about it, tied with blue ribbin. But when ministers and churchmembers take hold on it as Ernest White has and attacks it at theballot box, and defends and reinforces the right and left flank withall the spiritual and material and legal forces he can muster, whythen Satan feels his throne tremble under him and he shakes in hisshues. " But before Elder Wessel could frame a reply Josiah come in with thenews that the steamer had approached and brung mail to the passengers. And we all hurried up to see what we had got. Well, the steamer wuz passin' away like ships in the night, but Ifound that I had several letters from home. The children wuz gettin'well. Philury and Ury well and doin' well. And one letter wuz fromCousin John Richard, that blessed creeter! who, it will be remembered, went to Africa as a missionary to help the colony of freedmen to aknowledge of the true freedom in Christ Jesus. Only two idees thatblessed creeter ever seemed to have: first, what his duty wuz, and, second, to do it. His letter run as follows: "Dear Cousin: Here in the far off tropics where I thought to live anddie with the people I have loved and given my life to help, the Lordhas wonderfully blessed our labors. The Colony is prospering as Inever expected to see it. The people are beginning to see that a truerepublic can only exist by governing one's own self, that in the handsof each individual is the destiny of the nation. We are a peacefulpeople, greatly helped under the Lord by the fact that not a saloonblackens the pure air of Victor. "How can the crazed brain of a drunken man help a nation only toweaken and destroy? How can children born under the curse of drink beotherwise than a burden and curse to the public weal? How can arighteous ruler handle this menace to freedom and purity save to stampit beneath his feet? As we have no saloons in Victor, so we have noalmshouses or prisons, the few poor and wrongdoers being cared for byprivate individuals, remunerated by public tax. "So greatly has the Lord prospered us that I felt I was neededelsewhere more than here; I felt that America instead of Africa neededthe help of teachers of the Most High. Tidings have reached me fromthe Philippines that made me think it was my duty to go there. Intothese islands, inhabited, as has been said, by people 'half devil, half child, ' has been introduced the worst crime of America, the drinkevil, the worst demon outside the bottomless pit, making of sane, goodmen brutes and demons, a danger to themselves and the wholecommunity. "It is hard to believe that a Christian civilization, a Christianruler, should send regiments of bright young boys so far from all thedeterring influences of home and home life; send those who were thelight of happy homes, the idols of fond hearts, to face the dreadfulclimate, the savage warfare, to colonize the graveyards in the soddenearth, to be thrown into the worst evils of war, to face danger anddeath, and with all this provided by the government that shouldprotect them this dreadful temptation to ensnare their boyish willsand lead them into captivity. "Then I could not leave Victor, but now that I can I feel that God iscalling me to go there to preach the gospel of Christ, to fight thismighty foe, Intemperance, to preach the gospel of sane and cleanliving and thinking. Knowing from my experience here in Victor, had Ino other knowledge of it, how that blessed gospel of love is the onlytrue liberty. For what advantage is liberty of the body when the soul, the weak will, is bound in the most galling of chains? "America is doing a great work in educating and helping this country, and were it not for this evil I go to combat, its work would beblessed of God and man. "So, as I said, I sail to-morrow for the Philippines with three of mynative converts, good Christians, willing to die, if need be, fortheir faith. " This letter had been written more than a month, so long had it beencomin' to me, and I wuz tickled enough to think that when we got tothe Philippines we should see Cousin John Richard. CHAPTER XII The shore of Manila looked dretful low and flat as we come up to itsome as old Shelmadine's land lays along the lake shore. So you'dthink that if it rained hard and raised the water a inch it wouldoverflow it. And the houses looked dretful low and squatty, mebby itwuz on account of earthquakes they built 'em so. Josiah thought it wuzso they could shingle 'em standin' on the ground. I inclined to theearthquakes. Our boat wuz small enough to go over the surf and up the Pasig River. The water didn't look very clean, and on it wuz floatin' what lookedlike little cabbage heads. Josiah thought they wuz, and sez he realexcited: "Thank fortin if they have cabbages to throw away here I shall belikely to git a good biled dinner, and mebby a biled puddin' withlemon sass. " But they wuzn't cabbages, they wuz some kind of a water plant thatgrowed right there in the water. As we sailed along some queer lookin'boats, lookin' some like corn houses standin' on end, bulged outtowards us from the shore. They said they wuz cargo lighters to onloadships, and mebby they wuz. And one peculiarity I see that I despised. The natives all seemed to wear their shirts over their pantaloons, hangin' loose, and some on 'em didn't have on any pantaloons, jest theshirt, and some not even that, jest a sash or so tied round about'em. I despised the sight and sez to Josiah: "They might do as much as Adamdid anyway; they might wear some leaves round 'em, there is plenty offig trees here I spoze. " And he sez: "I have been thinkin' that it is a crackin' good idee towear the shirt over the pantaloons; it would be cool and look allright after we got used to it; the bottom of the shirt could beruffled or trimmed with tattin or red braid, and they would look asdressy agin as I've always wore 'em. " I looked daggers at him out of my eyes and sez: "What won't you takeit into your head to do next, Josiah Allen?" But our attention wuz drawed off by Arvilly, who approached us. Shelooked skornfully at the costoom of the natives, and I hearn her sayto herself: "Not much chance to canvass here. " But even as she spokeher eye fell hopefully on the opposite shore, like a good book agentscanning the earth and heavens for a possible subscriber. Miss Meechim, who had come on deck with Dorothy and Robert, lookedbenignantly at the natives and sez: "The poor ye shall always havewith you, " and she put her hand in the little bag that she always woreat her side and said: "I wonder if I have got a copy of that blessedtract with me, 'The Naked Sinner Clothed and in His Right Mind. '" But Robert sez to her: "They wouldn't thank you for clothes, AuntAlbina; you will have to wait until we reach New York; some of thenaked there would be gladly covered up from the snow and storms. " "Oh, don't compare our own blessed land with this heathen clime. " "But, " sez Robert, "the warm breezes here bring only joy and comfortto that sinner's naked limbs, and the sin of ignorance may beforgiven. But the shivering sinners, crouching on the cold stonedoorsteps, hearing dimly through their benumbed senses prayers andthanksgivings to the Most High for mercies they have no part in, whythat is quite a different matter. " Aronette wuz standing a little ways apart, talking with a young man. He wuz payin' her compliments, I knew, for there wuz a pink flush onher pretty face, and his eyes had admiration in them. I didn't likehis looks at all; he looked dissipated and kinder mean, and I thoughtI would warn her aginst him when I got a good chance. Lucia Wessel, too, wuz holding her young charge by the hand, but her attention wuzall drawed off by another young chap that I'd seen with her a numberof times, and I didn't like his looks; he had the same sort of adissipated look that the other young man had, but I see by theexpression of Lucia's innocent eyes that she didn't share in myopinion; she looked as if she wuz fairly wropped up in him. I wonderedwhat Elder Wessel would have said if he could have seen that look. Buthe wuz in blissful ignorance. He thought her bosom wuz composed of aequal mixture of snow and crystal, through which he could read everythought and emotion as soon as they wuz engraved on it. He thoughtthere was no characters written there as yet by any manly hand savehis own writ in characters of fatherly and daughterly love. He wuzholdin' forth to Arvilly, and she with her nose turned up as fur asnater would let it go, wuz listenin' because he wouldn't let her gitaway. I thought by her expression he wuz praisin' the license laws, for on no other subject wuz he so eloquent, and on no other didArvilly's nose turn up to such a hite. Dorothy and Tommy wondered what those strange trees were that grew onthe shore in front, and Robert Strong hastened to their side to helpthem to such information as he had on the subject. And he hadknowledge on almost every subject under the heavens, so it seemed tome. Well, anon or a little after, we found ourselves on shore and I wuzglad to feel terry firmy under my feet once more. Lots of times onboard ship the terry wuz so fur from the firmy that the solid landfelt good under the soles of our shoes. Yes, indeed! And though forsome time tables and chairs, and even beds and bureaus had a way ofadvancin' up towards us and then retreatin' away from us over andover, yet as I say terry wuz considerable more firmy than the deck hadbeen. Well, it wuzn't long before we found ourselves at a comfortable hotel, not too comfortable, but decently so; and in the fulness of time wewuz seated at the table partaking of food which, though it didn'ttaste like my good Jonesville vittles, still I could eat and bethankful for. Josiah whispered to me: "Onions and garlicks and peppers; I never could bear any on 'em, andhere I be filled up with 'em; there hain't a single dish on this tablebut what's full of 'em. Oh, Samantha!" sez he pitifully, "if I couldonly eat one of your good dinnerses or supperses agin' it seems as ifI would be willin' to die. " And I whispered back to him to be calm. Sez I, "Do be reasonable; itain't logic or religion to expect to be to home and travellin' abroadat the same time. " He see it wuzn't and subsided with a low groan, and begun to nibbleagin' on his food, but his looks wuz mournful, and if I could I wouldhave put on a apron willin'ly and gone down into the kitchen andcooked him a good square meal, but I knew it wouldn't be thought on, so I kep' calm. Well, our bed wuz kinder queer. It wuz quite noble lookin', four highposts with lace curtains looped up and mosquito nettin' danglin' down, and instead of springs a woven cane mattress stretched out lookin'some like our cane seat chairs. How to git under that canopy and notlet in a swarm of mosquitoes wuz what we didn't know, but we didfinally creep under and lay down. It wuz like layin' on the barnfloor, the cane mattress didn't yield a mite, and Josiah's low groansmingled with my sithes for quite a spell. Tommy wuz fast asleep in hislittle bed and so didn't sense anything. Well, the tegus night passedaway, happily I spoze for the attentive mosquitoes who shared thecanopy with us, and mebby liked to sample foreign acquaintances, buttegus for us, and we wuz glad when it wuz time to git up. The first meal of the day wuz brought to our room; chocolate not overgood, some bread and some eggs, almost raw, wuz what it consisted of. Josiah, who wanted some lamb chops, baked potatoes and coffee, wuz madas a hen. "Heavens and earth!" sez he, "why I never sucked eggs when aboy; have I got to come to it in my old age? Raw eggs and chocklateyou could cut with a knife. A few years of such food will leave you awidder, Samantha. " "Well, " sez I, "do let's make the best of it; when you're in Rome doas the Romans do. " "I shan't suck eggs, for no Romans or for no Phillippine. " "Eat 'em with your spoon, " sez I, "as you'd ort to. " "Or with my knife, " sez he. "Did you see them officers last night tothe table eatin' sass with a knife? I should thought they'd cut theirmouths open. " "Well, it is their way here, Josiah. Let's keep up and look forrerd togoin' home; that's the best fruit of travellin' abroad anyway, unlessit is seein' Tommy so well and hearty. " Josiah looked at his rosy face and didn't complain another word. Hejest worships Thomas Josiah. Well, after we eat this meal we went outwalkin', Josiah and I and Tommy, and I spoze Carabi went along, too, though we didn't see him. But then what two folks ever did see eachother? Why I never see Josiah, and Josiah never see me, not the realus. Well, it wuz a strange, strange seen that wuz spread out before us;the place looked more'n half asleep, and as if it had been nappin' forsome time; the low odd lookin' houses looked too as if they wuz in asort of a dream or stupor. The American flag waved out here and therewith a kind of a lazy bewildered floppin', as if it wuz wonderin' howunder the sun it come to be there ten thousand milds from Washington, D. C. , and it wuz wonderin' what on earth it floated out there in thefirst place for. But come to look at it clost you could see a kind ofa determined and sot look in the Stars and Stripes that seemed to say, "Well, now I am here I hain't goin' to be driv out by no yellergrounded flags whatsumever. " Some of the carriages that we met wuz queer lookin', rough woodentwo-wheeled carts, that looked as if they'd been made by hand thatmornin'. Josiah said that he could go out into the woods with Ury andcut down a tree and make a better lookin' wagon in half an hour, but Idon't spoze he could. Some on 'em wuz drawed by a buffalo, whichfilled Josiah with new idees about drivin' one of our cows in thedemocrat. Sez he: "Samantha, it would be real uneek to take you to meetin' withold Line back or Brindle, and if the minister got dry in meetin', andyou know ministers do git awful dry sometimes, I could just go out andmilk a tumbler full and pass it round to him. " But I drawed his attention off; I couldn't brook the idee of ridin'after a cow and havin' it bellerin' round the meetin' house. Thenative wimmen we met wuz some on 'em dressed American style, and someon 'em dressed in their own picturesque native costoom. It wuzsometimes quite pretty, and one not calculated to pinch the waist in. A thin waist, with immense flowing sleeves and embroidered chemiseshowing through the waist, a large handkerchief folded about the neckwith ends crossed, a gay skirt with a train and a square of blackcloth drawn tight around the body from waist to knees. Stockings arenot worn very much, and the slippers are not much more than soles withlittle strips of leather going over the foot, and no heels. Anon wewould meet some Chinamen, with eyes set in on a bias, and their hairhanging in two long tails down their backs; lots of them we see, thena priest would move slowly along, then a Spanish señora, then asailor, then perhaps a native dressed partly in European costoomlookin' like a fright. The street cars are little things drawed by onehorse, and the streets are badly paved when they're paved at all. There wuz some handsome houses in the residence portion of the city, but aside from the Cathedral there are few public buildings worthseeing. But one thing they have here always beautiful, and that is theluxuriant tropical vegetation, beautiful blossoming trees and shrubs, and the multitude of flowers, tall palms, bamboo, ebony, log-wood, mangoes, oranges, lemons, bread fruit, custard apples, and forty orfifty varieties of bananas, from little ones, not much more than amouthful, to them eighteen or twenty inches long. Josiah enjoyed hiswalk, finding many things to emulate when he got back to Jonesville. Among 'em wuz the Chinamen's hair; he thought it wuz a dressy way tocomb a man's hair, and he wondered dreamily how his would look if helet it grow out and braid it. But he said if he did, he should wearred ribbons on it, or baby blue. But I knew there wuz no danger of hishair ever stringin' down his back, for I could, if danger pressed toonear, cut it off durin' his sleep, and would, too, even if it led towords. Wall, Arvilly's first work, after she had canvassed the hotel-keeperfor the "Twin Crimes, " and as many of the guests as she could, wuz tofind out if Waitstill wuz there. And sure enough she found her. Shewuz in one of the hospitals and doin' a good work, jest as she wouldanywhere she wuz put. She come to the hotel to see us as soon as shecould, and Arvilly seemed to renew her age, having Waitstill with heragin. We writ to once to Cousin John Richard. Robert Strong and Dorothy wuz dretful interested in Waitstill, I couldsee, and they asked a great many questions about her work in thehospital. And I see that Robert wuz only grounded in his convictionswhen Waitstill told him of the sickness the doctors and nurses had tocontend with, and how largely it wuz caused by liquor drinking. Hundreds of American saloons in Manila, so she said, and sez she, "Howcan the hospitals hope to undo the evils that these do to men's soulsand bodies?" Sez she, "You know what a fearful disease and crimebreeder it is in a temperate climate, but it is tenfold worse here inthis tropical land. " She wuz anxious to hear all the news from Jonesville, and I willin'lytold her what Phila Ann had told me about Elder White, and the noblework he was doin' in East Loontown, and I sez, "Missionary work isjest as necessary and jest as important and pleasin' to God if done inLoontown as in the Antipithies. " And she said she knew it. And I sez: "Elder White is working himselfto death, and don't have the comforts of life, to say nothin' of thehappiness he ort to. " Waitstill didn't say nothin', but I fancied a faint pink flush stoleup into her white cheeks, some like the color that flashes up onto asnowbank at sunset. Life wuz all snow and sunset to her, I could see, but I knowed that she wuz the one woman in the world for Ernest White, the ideal woman his soul had always worshipped, and found realized inWaitstill--poor little creeter! I didn't know whether the warm sun of his love could melt the snow andfrozen hail or not--the sun duz melt such things--and I knew love wuzthe greatest thing in the world. Well, I had to leave the event toProvidence, and wuz willin' to; but yet, after a woman duz leavethings to the Most High to do, she loves to put in her oar and helpthings along; mebby that is the way of Providence--who knows? But'tennyrate I gin another blind hint to her before we left theconversation. Sez I, "Ernest White is doin' the Lord's work if ever a man did, and Ican't think it is the Lord's will that whilst he's doin' it he ort toeat such bread as he has to--milk emtin's and sour at that, to saynothin' of fried stuff that a anaconda couldn't digest. He deserves asweet, love-guarded home, and to be tended to by a woman that heloves--one who could inspire him and help him on in the heavenly wayhe's treading alone and lonesome. " Her cheeks did turn pink then, andher eyes looked like deep blue pools in which stars wuz shinin', butshe didn't say anything, and Robert Strong resoomed his talk with herabout her hospital work. And before she left he gin her a big check touse for her patients; I don't know exactly how big it wuz, but it wentup into the hundreds, anyway; and Dorothy gin her one, too, for I seeher write it; Miss Meechim gin her her blessin' and more'n a dozentracts, which mebby will set well on the patients, if administeredcautious. I myself gin her the receipt for the best mustard poulticethat ever drawed, and two pairs of clouded blue-and-white wool socks Ihad knit on the way, and though it wuz a warm country she said theywould come handy when her patients had chills. There wuz two young American girls at the hotel, and they happened tocome into the parlor while we wuz talkin' and they sent a bigpresent to the hospital. I guess they wuz real well off and gooddispositioned. They wuz travellin' alone and seemed to be havin' areal good time. One on 'em wuz sunthin' of a invalid, but wuzoutdoors all day, I spoze tryin' to git well. They minded theirown bizness and didn't do any hurt so fur as I could see, butElder Wessel couldn't bear 'em. Sez he to me one day: "I spoze they represent the new young woman?" He said it real skornful, and Arvilly, who wuz present, took him upreal snappish. "Well, what of it? What have they done?" If that poorman had said that black wuz black and white wuz white, Arvilly wouldfound fault with it. "I don't object to what they have done, " sez he, "so much as to whatthey are. Young American women know too much. " And Arvilly sez with ameanin' glance at him, "That is sunthin' that everybody don't have tostand. " She might just as well have called him a fool, her axent wuz such. Arvilly is too hash. Sez he: "Now my Lucia is different. She knowsnothing about sin and wickedness, and I got this position for her, sothat as soon as she left the convent she was placed directly in thecare of this good woman and her little innocent child. What does sheknow of sin or sorrow, or worldliness or vanity?" "Or danger?" sez I meanin'ly. "If she always has some one at her sideto guard her, her perfect ignorance and innocence is a charm, but howwould it be in the hour of danger and temptation? Why should anybodyfear being burned if they had no knowledge of fire?" "Oh, " sez he, "her divine innocence is her safeguard. Evil wouldretire abashed before the timid glance of her pure eyes. " "I hope so, " sez I dryly. "I hope so. But I never knew the whitenessof its wool to help a lamb if a wolfdog got after it. But mebby itwill in her case, " sez I reasonably. "I don't want to break up yourhappiness, " sez I. "You cannot, " sez he dogmatically. "You cannot. I have brought up myLucia in the only right way for a young girl to be brought up. She hasbeen completely separated from young people of the opposite sex; sheknows nothing of fashionable flirting and folly. And when I see suchabnormal creatures as the New Girl, as they call her, I am horrified, shocked beyond words at the spectacle of their brazen independence andwhat they call their freedom, their comradeship with the opposite sex, their fearlessness and boldness and frankness with gentlemen, talkingwith them really as if they were of the same sex as themselves. As Isee this I thank God my Lucia is different. " Well, she wuz a pretty little thing, with eyes as innocent and timidas a young fawn's that had never been outside its green covert in thegreat wilderness. But I knew that under her baby looks and baby wayswuz a woman's heart; a woman's emotions and impulses would roust upwhen the time come and the sun of love shone down on her. Why, Naterhad layed down laws before Elder Wessel did; he couldn't keep herfrom thinkin' about her future mate; she would let her mind dwell onsome one if it wuz only the man in the moon. And I knew the world wuzfull of bad men as well as good men. How would it be with her ifthrown with a wolf in sheep's clothing? If guarded and sheltered, allright, but if onguarded and onwarned and thrown into temptation anddanger, I felt that trouble wuz ahead for Lucia Wessel. But I knew itwuz no use for me to hist up a danger flag in front of her, for herfather wouldn't let me. But I felt dubersome about her, dretfuldubersome. She and Aronette had formed a real girl attachment for eachother, and some way I didn't like the idee on't, but don't know as Icould have told why. Well, we didn't lay out to stay long in Manila, but we did stay longenough so Dorothy and Miss Meechim and Robert Strong went round andsee the different islands. They went to Illollo and wuz gone for threedays, Aronette stayin' with me at the tarven, and Dorothy told me whenshe got back how beautiful the journey wuz. The water wuz like glass, the sunrise and sunset marvellous, thickly wooded shores on eitherside filled with oncounted wealth. Great forests of sandal-wood, enough to build houses of, and how we treasure little snips on't infan sticks. Mahogany trees enough to build barns and cow stables on, and how we gloat over a old clock case or lamp stand made on't. Shesaid that Illollo wuz like most old Spanish towns, dretful old lookin'and kinder run down. The natives dressed like others she had seen, butspoke a different language. They went to the American general'sheadquarters some two milds off. A hundred varieties of palm treesgrow along the road and every sort of tropical tree. The natives wuzall dark complected, but some good lookin', most all bareheaded orelse with a gay turban and knives stuck in the sashes of their gaytunics. One day whilst the party wuz gone Tommy and I wuz takin' a littlewalk; Josiah couldn't go, he had got hold of a New York paper ofthree weeks before, and was readin' it through from title page to Lostand Found column. We wandered into a little cross street lined on eachside with little shops with the shopkeepers squattin' in the door, andoutside the native wives and children. Everything under the sun almostwuz to be found in these shops, and we had wandered along for quite agood ways lookin' at the curious things, and still more curiouspeople, when we met Aronette and Lucia, accompanied by the two youngmen I had seen with 'em on the boat; they wuz on the stoop of one ofthe old business buildin's, gigglin' and laughin' like a bevy ofswallers round the eaves of a Jonesville barn. But, as I said before, I didn't like the looks of the young men, andon Aronette's return I told her so, feelin' I wuz in a measureresponsible for her safety whilst her mistress wuz away. Aronette wuzcombin' Tommy's hair and curlin' it over her finger as I talked toher, which made me feel some mean to attact her whilst in my service, but Duty's apron string fluttered down before me and I stiddied myselfon it as I spoke real good warnin' words to her. Sez I, "My dear, I didn't like the looks of the young men I saw youwalkin' with to-night. " Sez I, "I saw them two young men coming out ofa saloon not a half hour before, and" sez I, "they look to medissipated and mean. They drink; I know by their looks they do. " And she sez, "Oh, dear madam, I only went out to take the air a littlewhile. You know I care for nobody in this country. My heart is in oldNormandie, " sez she, the tears welling up to the blue well of hereyes. "My heart is with my Pierre, but, " sez she, kinder tossin' herhead, not a high toss, only a little vain pretty motion of a pretty, thoughtless girl, some like a bluebird in the spring of the year, "ifa young man insists on paying you a little attention what can a poorlittle girl do? The days are long when one is young and her own Pierreso far away, and, dear madam, Lucia was with me. " "Another innocent, ignorant young creature, " sez I; "two littlebutterflies fluttering about instead of one, not thinkin' or carin'for the fouler's net, " sez I, smilin' on her pleasant, for I couldn'thelp it. For I knew the heart of youth, and the monotony of life, andthe need of young hearts for each other. But I didn't like the youngmen's looks and told her so agin, and she laughed, and said she didn'tlike their looks either. Sez she, "Their breath always smells of thewhiskey. Faugh!" sez she, "it makes me sick, " and she shrugged hershoulders in the true French way. And I sez agin, lookin' solemn, "No young man whose breath smells ofwhiskey is safe for any young girl to associate with. It is a pizenatmosphere that blasts every sweet and pure thing that comes nigh it. "And I sithed. And she said in her own sweet way that she knew I was telling thetruth, for I talked just as her own sweet mother did. And she bentdown with one of her pretty foreign ways and kissed my hand. Dearlittle thing, I didn't spoze my talk had done her much good, but thenI considered it couldn't do her any hurt 'tennyrate. And so I left theevent to the overruling Power, just as we poor weak mortals have to. CHAPTER XIII Well, a day or two after that Josiah and I wuz takin' a walk, meetin'occasionally Turks all dressed Turkey fashion, and Japans, and Yankeesand men and wimmen and children, when who should we meet face to facebut Cousin John Richard, that blessed man. As I said, we had writ andwrit and tried to find him, but didn't know but we should have to huntround considerable, but wuz bound to not leave the islands till we'dseen him. But lo and behold! here he wuz, lookin' just as good andheavenly minded as ever. He wuz santerin' along apparently lost indeep thought or nearly lost. But when he see us he grasped our hands with a welcome that made usknow that no matter to what a extent a man's soul may live in theheavens, his heart is tied with deathless ties to the relations on hisown side and to their pardners if they be congenial. We stopped stun still and talked quite a spell about different things, our health, the relations and so forth. Anon I sez, "Cousin John Richard, you look wan and pale, but it is ablessed work you are doin'. " He had opened a midnight mission, helpin' the weak and tempted andovercome of both sects, preachin' the love of Christ and follerin' histeachin' up by good works. He told us all about it as we santered on and said he wuz not weary ordiscouraged. And I could see that though his linement looked pale andworn a deathless light shone in his deep kind eyes and I knew he wuzendurin' as seein' Him who wuz invisible. As we walked on he said, sadly pintin' to a barren lookin' spot sownthick with graves, "In this deadly climate the Drink Demon has littleto do to assist his brother, Death. Our poor northern boys fall likerotten leaves before a hurricane. " Sez I, lookin' up to the blue sky, "Why don't the heavens fall whensuch things affront the light of day!" "The patience of God, " sez Cousin John Richard, "is one of the thingswe cannot measure. " "Nor his pity nuther, " sez I in heart-broken axents, for as I lookedat them thickly sown graves and thought of the mothers and wives andsweethearts fur, fur away mournin' for them that wuz not, my tearsfell and I wiped 'em off with my snowy linen handkerchief. Well, Cousin John Richard had an appointment in another part of thecity and we parted away from each other, he promisin' to come and seeus at our tarven before we left the city. Well, we didn't make a long stay in Manila. But Arvilly beset me to gowith her to see General Grant, who was here on a tour of inspection, on this subject so near to her heart, and which she had made herlifework. She said that it wuz my duty to go. But I sez, "Arvilly, you talk so hash; I can't bear to have the son ofthe man who saved his country talked to as I am afraid you will if yougit to goin'. " Sez she, "I won't open my head. You know the subject from A to izzard. I'll jest stand by and listen, but somebody ort to talk to him. Hundreds and hundreds of American saloons in this one city! Forcedonto these islands by our country. Sunthin' has got to be done aboutit. If you don't go and talk to him about it I shall certainly goalone, and if I do go, " sez she, "he will hear talk that he neverhearn before. " "I'll go, Arvilly, " sez I hurriedly, "I'll go and do the best I can, but if you put in and talk so hash it will jest throw me off thetrack. " "A promise is a promise, " sez she; "I never did break my word yet. " Well, havin' made the necessary preliminary moves, we met GeneralGrant by appointment in his own quarters. Before we got inside thelines we had to advance and give the countersign, which wuz Whiskey. Arvilly planted herself right there like a balky mule and said shewould die in her tracks before she said it. But I, knowin' that itwouldn't make nor break the traffick, sez, "Whiskey, " and I added, "May the Lord destroy it!" Arvilly sez, "Amen!" and we walked in pastthe astounded sentry with out heads up. (General Grant hadn't nothin'to do with that countersign; it wuz some officer's doin's. ) Well, General Grant seemed quite pleased to see us. He's a real good-lookin'man, and if he hadn't any properties of his own he would be belovedfor his pa's sake, but he has properties of his own. He is a good manand a smart one. Well, the first compliments bein' passed, I lanchedout into my bizness. Sez I, "Brigadier General Grant, I have come to you on the mostimportant mission any ambassador ever travelled on. " Sez he, "What sovereign, madam, do you represent, and from whatcountry do you come?" Sez I, "Brigadier General Grant, my mission isfrom the Lord of Hosts, and the country I come to plead for is yourown native land--the United States--the land your own illustrious pasaved with the Lord's help. " He wuz deeply affected I see and invited us to set down, consequentlywe sot. And I sez, plungin' to once into my bizness as my way is inJonesville or the Antipathies: "Brigadier General, everybody knowsthat you are a brave man and a good man. " He thanked me and lookedpleased, as well he might from such an enconium from one of the firstwimmen of the ages, and I resoomed: "General Grant, " sez I, "are youbrave enough and good enough to tackle the worst foe America everhad?" Sez he, "What foe do you allude to, mam?" Sez I, "The foe that slays one hundred thousand a year, and causes tenthousand murders every year, steals the vittles and clothes fromstarvin' wimmen and children, has its deadly grip on Church and State, and makes our civilization and Christianity a mock and byword amongstthem that think. " "You allude to Intemperance, I presume, " sez he. He's dretful smart;he knew it in a minute from my description. "Yes, " sez I, "a foe a million times as dangerous as any your armyever faced, and a million times as hard to chase out of itsambuscade. " Sez I, "Frederic (I thought mebby it would sound more convincin' andfriendly if I called him Frederic, and I wanted to convince him; Iwanted to like a dog), I don't believe in war, but when your men diedin battle they didn't moulder out a livin' death, chained to tenderhearts, dragged along the putrid death path with 'em. Their countryhonored 'em; they wuzn't thrust into dishonored graves, some aspaupers, some as criminals swingin' from scaffolds. Their countrymourns for 'em and honors 'em. It wuzn't glad to cover their facesaway from the light, brutish faces to hant 'em with reproach, I shouldthink, knowin' how they died. Try to think of that, Frederic; try totake it to heart. " I hearn Arvilly behind me breathin' hard and kinder chokin' seemin'ly, and I knew she wuz holdin' herself in as tight as if she had a roperound her emotions and indignations to keep her from breakin' in andjinin' our talk, but she wuz as true as steel to her word and didn'tsay nothin' and I resoomed: "You've got to take such things to hum to realize 'em, " sez I. "Owin'to a sweet mother and a good father your boy mebby is safe. Butspozein' he wuzn't, spozein' you and his sweet ma had to look on asmillions of other pas and mas have to and see his handsome, manlyyoung face growin' red, dissipated, brutal; his light, gay young heartchanged to a demon's, and from bein' your chief pride you had to hidehim out of sight like the foul and loathsome leper he had become. Millions of other pas and mas that love their boys as well as you loveyours have to do this. And if it wuz your boy what would you say ofthe legalized crime that made him so? Wouldn't you turn the might ofyour great strength aginst it?" He didn't speak out loud, but I see from his looks that he would. "Then, " sez I, "do, do think of other pas and mas and sisters andsweethearts and wives weepin' and wailin' for husbands, sons andbrothers slain by this enemy! I spoze, " sez I reasonably, "that youthink it is an old story and monotonous, but Love is an old story andGrief and Death, but they are jest as true as at the creation and jestas solemn. " I thought he looked a good deal convinced, but he lookedas if he wuz thinkin' of the extreme difficulty of reachin' andvanquishin' this foe intrenched as it is in the lowest passions ofmen, hidin' behind the highest legal barriers and barricaded behindmeetin' house doors, guarded by the ballots of saint and sinner; Iread these thoughts on his forehead, and answered 'em jest as if he'dspoke. Sez I, "When your illustrious father come up face to face with a foeno other general could manage, did he flinch and draw back because ithad been called onmanageable by everybody else? No, he drawed a linebetween good and evil, black and white, and says, 'I'll fight it rightout on this line. ' And he did, and before his courage and bravery andpersistence the foe fell. Now, Frederic, here is the biggest foe thatthe American people are facin' to-day; here are weak generals andincompetent ones. Nobody can manage it; them high in authority wink atit and dassent tackle it, and so on down through all the grades ofsociety--Church and State--they dassent touch it. And what is theburnin'est shame, them that ort to fight it support it with all thepolitical and moral help they can give it. Here is a chance, Frederic, for you to do tenfold more for your country's good than ever yourrevered father did, and you know and I know that if it wasn't for thisgreat evil and a few others, such as the big Trusts and a few otherthings, our country is the greatest and best that the sun ever shoneon. If we loved our country as we ort to we would try to make her doaway with these evils and stand up perfect under the heavens. It isthe ma that loves her child that spanks her into doin' right if shecan't coax her, and now do lay hold and help your country up onto thehighest pedestal that a country ever stood on, and I'll help boost allI can. " I hearn behind me a loud "amen, " turned into a cough. Arvillywuzn't to blame; it spoke itself onbeknown to her. Sez I, "This is a hard job I am askin' you to tackle. The foe yourfather fit was in front of him, but this foe is within and without, and has for allies, powers and principalities and the Prince ofDarkness. And now will you, bearin' the name you do, of General Grant, will you flinch before this black-hearted foe that aims at the heartand souls of your countrymen and countrywomen, or will you lead theForlorn Hope? I believe that if you would raise the White Banner andlead on this army of the Cross, Church and State would rally to yourbattle-cry, angels would swarm round your standard and the Lord ofHosts go forward before you. " He didn't say he would, I spoze he wuz too agitated. But he sezsunthin' in a real polite way about what a good Ambassador his countryhad in me. But I sez sadly, "I can't do much, Frederic. I am a woman, and theonly weepon that is able to slay this demon is hung up there inWashington, D. C. Wimmen can't reach up to it, they can't vote. Butyou can; your arm is longer, and with that you can slay this demon asSt. George slew the dragon. And heaven itself would drop down heavenlyimmortelles to mix with our laurel leaves to crown your forehead. Think on it, Frederic, no war wuz ever so holy, no war on earth wuzever so full of immortal consequences. " And here I riz up, for I felt that I must leave the Presence, notwantin' to make the Presence twice glad. I reached out my right handand sez, "Good-by, and God bless you, for your own sake and for thesake of your noble pa. " He looked earnest and thoughtful, that allusion to the boy he lovedso, named after his illustrious grandpa, had touched his very soul. Ifelt that I had not lost my breath or the eloquence I had lavished. Ifelt that he would help save other bright young boys from the demonthat sought their lives--the bloody demon that stalks up and down ourcountry wrapped in a shelterin' mantilly made of the Stars andStripes--oh, for shame! for shame that it is so! But I felt thatGeneral Grant would come up to the help of the Lord aginst the mighty, I felt it in my bones. But I wuz brung down a good deal in my feelin'sas Arvilly advanced to the front. She had kep' her word as to talkin', though the indignant sniffs and sithes behind me showed how hard ithad been for her to keep her word, but now she advanced and sez, asshe drew out her two books from her work bag: "General Grant, I havetwo books here I would like to show you, one is the 'Twin Crimes ofAmerica: Intemperance and Greed, ' that subject so ably presented toyou by Samantha; the other is 'The Wild, Wicked and Warlike Deeds ofMen. '" Sez General Grant, risin' up: "I haven't time, madam, to examine them, but put me down as a subscriber to both. " Arvilly wuz in high speritsall the way back. As we wended our way to the tarven agin who shouldwe find but Waitstill Webb, and we wuz dretful glad on't, for we wuzlayin' out to leave Manila in a few days, and this would be our lastmeetin' for some time, if not forever. Though I wuz glad to see whenquestioned by me about her return that she didn't act so determined asshe had acted about devotin' her hull life to nursin' the sick. She told Arvilly confidential that she had had a letter from ErnestWhite since we had seen her. Arvilly knew that he had wanted to makeher his bride before she left Jonesville. But the two ghosts, hermurdered love and her duty, stalked between 'em then, and I spozedwuz stalkin' some now. But as I said more previous, the sun will meltthe snow, and no knowin' what will take place. I even fancied that thecold snow wuz a little more soft and slushy than it had been, butcouldn't tell for certain. CHAPTER XIV A dretful thing has happened! I am almost too agitated to talk aboutit, but when I went down with my pardner and Tommy to breakfast rutherlate, for we wrote some letters before we went down, Miss Meechimbroke the news to me with red eyes, swollen with weepin'. Aronette, that dear sweet little maid that had waited on all on us as devoted asif we wuz her own mas and mas, wuz missin'. Her bed hadn't been slep'in for all night; she went out early in the evenin' on a errent forDorothy and hadn't come back. She slept in a little room off from Dorothy's, who had discoveredAronette's absence very early in the morning, and they had all beensearching for her ever sence. But no trace of her could be found; shehad disappeared as utterly as if the earth had opened and swallowedher up. Dorothy wuz sick in bed from worry and grief; she lovedAronette like a sister; and Miss Meechim said, bein' broke up bysorrow, "Next to my nephew and Dorothy I loved that child. " And anon another dretful thing wuz discovered. Whilst we wuz talkin'about Aronette, Elder Wessel rushed in distracted, with his neck-tiehangin' under one ear, and his coat buttoned up wrong and the feathersof his conceit and egotism and self-righteousness hangin' limp as awet hen. Lucia had gone too; had disappeared jest as Aronette had, no tracecould be found of her; her bed had not been slept in. She, too, hadgone out on an errent the evening before. She and Aronette had beenseen to leave the hotel together in the early evening. Elder Wessel, half distracted, searched for them with all his strength of mind andpurse. I started Josiah off a huntin' the minute he had got through eatin'. He refused pint blank to go before. "Eat, " sez I, "who can eat in sucha time as this?" Sez he, "It goes agin my stomach every mou'ful I take (which was trueanyway), but we must eat, Samantha, " sez he, helpin' himself toanother cake. "We must eat so's to keep up our strength to hunt highand low. " Well, I spozed he wuz in the right on't, but every mou'ful he consumedriled me. But at last the plate wuz emptied and the coffee pot out andhe sot off. And we searched all that day and the next and the next, and so did Miss Meechim and Arvilly, with tears runnin' down her faceanon or oftener. Robert Strong, led on, Miss Meechim said by her anxiety, but I thoughtmebby by the agony in Dorothy's sweet eyes as well as his own goodheart, didn't leave a stone unturned in his efforts to find 'em. Butthey had disappeared utterly, no trace could be found of 'em. They hadbeen seen during the evening with the two young men they had gotacquainted with and that I didn't like. They had been seen speakingwith them as they came out of the shop where Dorothy had sentAronette, and the young men could not be found. Well, we had all searched for three days without finding any trace ofthe two missing girls. Everything wuz ready for our departure, butDorothy said that she could not, could not go without Aronette, butRobert Strong said and believed that the child was dead. He had cometo the belief that she and Lucia by some accident had fallen into thewater and wuz drowned. Dorothy had cried herself sick and she lookedwan and white, but bein' so sweet dispositioned she give up when weall said that we must go before long, and said that she would go too, though I knew that her heart would remain there wanderin' round inthem queer streets huntin' for her lost one. The morning of the thirdday after they wuz lost I wuz down in the parlor, when a man come inand spoke to Robert Strong, and they both went out together talkingearnestly, and I see in Robert's face a look of horrow and surprisethat I had never seen in it before; and the first time Robert saw mealone after that he told me the dretful news. He said that the manthat spoke to him was a detective he had employed, and the eveningbefore he had come acrost a man who had been out of town since thenight Aronette wuz lost. This man told the detective that he saw herand Lucia and the two young men coming out of a saloon late at night, staggering and reeling they all wuz, and they disappeared down a crossstreet towards another licensed house of ruin. Licensed by ChristianAmerica! Oh, my achin' heart to think on't! "I wonder if our govermuntis satisfied now, " I broke out, "since it has ruined her, one of thesweetest girls in the world. But how did they ever entice 'em intothat saloon?" sez I. "They might have made them think it was respectable, they do servelunches at some of them; of course they didn't know what kind of aplace it was. And after they wuz made stupid drunk they didn't know orcare where they went. " "I wonder if America is satisfied now!" I sez agin, "reachin' out herlong arms clear acrost the Pacific to lead them sweet girls into thepit she has dug for her soldiers? Oh!" sez I, "if she'd only beendrownded!" And I wiped my streamin' eyes on my linen handkerchief. And Robert sithed deep and sez, "Yes, if she had only died, and, " hesez, "I can't tell Dorothy, I cannot. " And I sez, "There is no need on't; better let her think she's dead. How long, " sez I, turning toward him fierce in my aspect, "how long isthe Lord and decent folks goin' to allow such things to go on?" And he sez, "Heaven knows, I don't. " And we couldn't say more, forDorothy wuz approachin', and Robert called up a smile to his troubledface as he went forward to meet her. But he told me afterwards thatthe news had almost killed Elder Wessel. He had to tell him to helphim in his search. He wuz goin' to stay on there a spell longer. Hehad to tell him that Lucia had been seen with Aronette staggering outof a saloon with two young men late at night, reeling down a by-streetto that other licensed house which our Christian govermunt keeps nighthe saloon, it is so obleegin' and fatherly to its men and boys. When he told him Elder Wessel fell right down in his chair, Robertsaid, and buried his face in his hands, and when he took his handsdown it wuz from the face of an old man, a haggard, wretched, broken-down old man. The People's Club House didn't wear the kindly beneficent aspect ithad wore. He felt that coffee and good books and music would have beensafer to fill the Poor Man's Club with; safer for the poor man; saferfor the poor man's family. Tea and coffee seemed to look different tohim from whiskey, and true liberty that he had talked about didn'tseem the liberty to kill and destroy. The license law didn't wear theaspect it had wore to him, the two licensed institutions ChristianAmerica furnished for its citizens at home and abroad seemed now tohim, instead of something to be winked at and excused, to be twoaccursed hells yawning for the young and innocent and unsuspicious aswell as for the wicked and evil-minded. Ungrateful country, here wuzone of thy sons who sung the praises of thy institutions under everysky! Ungrateful indeed, to pierce thy most devoted vassal with thissharp thorn, this unbearable agony. "For how was he goin' to live through it, " he cried. How was he? Hisbeautiful, innocent daughter! his one pet lamb! It was not for herundoing that he had petted and smiled on these institutions, thefierce wolves of prey, and fed them with honeyed words of excuse andpraise. No, it wuz for the undoing of some other man's daughter thathe had imagined these institutions had been raised and cherished. He wuz an old broken man when he tottered out of that room. And whilstwe wuz moving heaven and earth hunting for the girls he wuz ravingwith delerium with a doctor and trained nurse over him. Poor man!doomed to spend his hull life a wretched wanderer, searching for theidol of his heart he wuz never to see agin--never! Well, the time come when we wuz obleeged to leave Manila. RobertStrong, for Dorothy's sake as well as his own, left detectives to helpon the search for the lost ones, and left word how to communicate withhim at any time. Waitstill Webb, bein' consulted with, promised to doall in her power to help find them, but she didn't act half so shockedand horrified as I spozed she would, not half so much as Arvilly did. She forgot her canvassin' and wep' and cried for three or four daysmost all the time, and went round huntin', actin' more'n half crazy, her feelin's wuz such. But I spoze the reason Waitstill acted so calmwuz that such things wuz so common in her experience. She hadknowledge of the deadly saloon and its twin licensed horror, dretfulthings was occurring all the time, she said. The detectives also seemed to regard it as nothing out of the common, and as to the saloon-keeper, so much worse things wuz happenin' allthe time in his profession, so much worse crimes, that he and his richpardner, the American Govermunt, sees goin' on all the time in theircountless places of bizness, murders, suicides, etc. , that theyevidently seemed to consider this a very commonplace affair; and so ofthe other house kep' by the two pardners, the brazen-faced old hag andChristian America, there, too, so many more terrible things wuzoccurrin' all the time that this wuz a very tame thing to talk about. But to us who loved her, to us whose hearts wuz wrung thinkin' of her, mournin' for her, cryin' on our pillers, seekin' with agonized, hopeless eyes for our dear one, we kep' on searchin' day and night, hopin' aginst hope till the last minute of our stay there. And themoon and stars of the tropics looked in night after night to the roomwhere the old father lay at death's door, mourning for his beautifulinnocent daughter who wuz lost--lost. But the hour come for us to go and we went, and right by us, day ornight, in sun or shade, from that hour on a black shadder walked bythe side on us in place of the dimpled, merry face of the little maid. We didn't forgit her in the highest places or the lowest. And afterdays and days had passed I felt guilty, and as if I hadn't ort to behappy, and no knowin' where she'd drifted to in the cruel under world, and wuz like sea-weed driftin' in the ocean current. And when we wuzout evenin's, no matter where I wuz, I watched the faces of everypainted, gaudy dressed creeter I see, flittin' down cross streets, hoping and dreading to see Aronette's little form. Arvilly and MissMeechim openly and loudly, and Dorothy's pale face and sorrowful eyes, told the story that they too wuz on the watch and would always be. Butnever did we catch a glimpse of her! never, never. As we drew nigh to the city of Victoria on Hongkong island we see thatit wuz a beautiful place. Big handsome houses built of gray stun, broad roads tree-bordered, leadin' up from terrace to terrace, allfull of trees, covered with luxuriant tropical foliage. It wuz a fairseen clear from the water's edge, with its tall handsome houses risin'right up from the edge of the bay, clear up to the top of Victoriamountain, that stands up two thousand feet, seemin'ly lookin' over thecity to see what it is about. And this is truth and not clear simely, for the Governor General and Chief Justice have houses up there whichthey call bungalows, and of course they have got to see what is goin'on. The hull island is only nine milds long and three wide. And herewe wuz ten thousand milds from home. Did the Hongkongers ever thinkon't, that they wuz ten thousand milds from Jonesville? I hope theydidn't, it would make 'em too melancholy and deprested. We all went to a comfortable tarven nigh by, and after partakin' ofnourishin' food, though kinder queer, and a good night's rest, we feltready to look round and see what we could. Josiah and I, with littleTommy, wuz the first ones up in the mornin', and after breakfast wesallied out into the street. Here I proposed that we should take ajinrikisha ride. This is a chair some like a big willow chair, onlywith a long pole fastened to each side and two men to carry you round. Josiah wuz real took with the looks on 'em, and as the prize wuz lowwe got into the chairs, Tommy settin' in Josiah's lap, and wuz carriedfor quite a ways through the narrer streets, with shops juttin' out oneach side, makin' 'em still narrerer. Josiah gin orders that I overheard to "go at a pretty good jog pastthe stores where wimmen buy sooveneers, " but I presoomed that theydidn't understand a word he said, so it didn't do any hurt and Ilaid out to git some all the same. But what a sight them streetswuz; they wuz about twenty feet wide, and smooth and clean, butconsiderable steep. To us who wuz used to the peaceful deacons ofJonesville and their alpaca-clad wives and the neighbors, whousually borry sleeve and skirt and coat and vest patterns, and solook all pretty much alike, what a sight to see the folks we did ingoin' through just one street. Every sort of dress that ever wuzwore we see there, it seemed to me--Europeans, Turks, Mohomadeans, Malays, Japanese, Javanese, Hindoos, Portuguese, half castes, andChinese coolies. Josiah still called 'em "coolers, " because they wuzdressed kinder cool, but carryin' baskets, buckets, sedans, ortrottin' a sort of a slow trot hitched into a jinrikisha, orholdin' it on each side with their hands, with most nothin' on andtwo pigtail braids hangin' down their backs, and such a jabberin'in language strange to Jonesville ears; peddlers yellin' out theirgoods, bells ginglin', gongs, fire-crackers, and all sorts of workgoin' on right there in the streets. Strange indeed to Jonesvilleeyes! Catch our folks takin' their work outdoors; we shouldn't callit decent. We went to the Public Gardens, which wuz beautiful with richly coloredornamental shrubbery. I sez to Josiah: "Did I ever expect to see allspice trees?" And he sez: "I can't bear allspice anyway. " "Well, " sez I, "cinnamon trees; who ever thought of seein' cinnamontrees?" An' he looked at 'em pretty shrewd and sez: "When I git home I shan'tpay no forty cents a pound for cinnamon. I can tell 'em I've seen thetrees and I know it ort to be cheaper. " Sez he, "I could scrape off apound or two with my jack-knife if we could carry it. " But I hurried him on; I wuzn't goin' to lug a little wad of cinnamonten thousand milds, even if he got it honest. Well, we stayed here forquite a spell, seein' all the beautiful flowers, magnificentorchids--that would bring piles of money to home, jest as common hereas buttercups and daisies in Jonesville, and other beautiful exotics, that we treasure so as houseplants, growin' out-doors here in grandluxuriance--palms, tree-ferns, banian trees, everything I used towonder over in my old gography I see right here growin' free. Tommywuz delighted with the strange, beautiful flowers, so unlike anythinghe had ever seen before. We had got out and walked round a spell here, and when we went to git into our sedan chairs agin, I wuz a littlebehind time, and Josiah hollered out to me: "Fey tea, Samantha!" "Tea?" sez I. "I hain't got any tea here. " And I sez with dignity, "Idon't know what you mean. " "Fey tea, " he sez agin, lookin' clost at me. And I sez agin with dignity, "I don't know what you mean. " And he sezto me: "I am talkin' Chinese, Samantha; that means 'hurry up. ' I shalluse that in Jonesville. When you're standin' in the meetin' house doortalkin' about bask patterns and hired girls with the female sisters, and I waitin' in the democrat, I shall holler out, 'Fie tea, Samantha;' it will be very stylish and uneek. " I didn't argy with him, but got in well as I could, but havin' steppedon my dress and most tore it, Josiah hollered out, "See sum! see sum!Samantha!" And I, forgittin' his fashionable aims, sez to him, "See some what, Josiah?" "See sum, Samantha. That means 'be careful. ' I shall use that too inJonesville. How genteel that will make me appear to holler out toBrother Gowdey or Uncle Sime Bentley, in a muddy or slippery time, 'See sum, Brother Gowdey; see sum, Uncle Sime!' Such doin's will makeme sought after, Samantha. " "Well, " sez I, "we'd better be gittin' back to the tarven, for Arvillywill be wonderin' where we are and the rest on 'em. " "Well, just as you say, Samantha, " and he leaned back in his chair andwaved his hand and says to the men, "Fey tea, fey tea; chop, chop. " I expect to see trouble with that man in Jonesville streets with hisforeign ways. Well, we wuz passin' through one of the narrer streets, through aperfect bedlam of strange cries in every strange language under thesun, so it seemed, and seein' every strange costoom that wuz everwore, when, happy sight to Jonesville eyes, there dawned on my wearyvision a brown linen skirt and bask, made from my own pattern. Yes, there stood Arvilly conversin' with a stately Sikh policeman. Sheheld up the "Twin Crimes" in a allurin' way and wuz evidentlyrehearsin' its noble qualities. But as he didn't seem to understand aword she said she didn't make a sale. But she wuz lookin' roundundanted for another subscriber when she ketched sight of us. And atmy request we dismissed the jinrikishas and walked back to the tarvenwith her. Dorothy and Miss Meechim and Robert Strong come back pretty soon froma tower of sight-seein', and they said we'd all been invited to tiffenwith the Governor-General the next day. Well, I didn't have the leastidee what it wuz, but I made up my mind to once that if tiffenin' wuzanything relatin' to gamblin' or the opium trade, I shouldn't have athing to do with it. But Josiah spoke right up and sez he had rathersee tiffen than anybody else in China, and mistrustin' from Robert'slooks that he had made a mistake, he hastened to add that tiffenin'wuz sunthin' he had always hankered after; he had always wanted totiffen, but hadn't the means in Jonesville. Sez Robert, "Then I shall accept this invitation for breakfast for allour party. " And after they went out I sez: "I'd hold myself a littleback, Josiah. To say that you'd never had means to take breakfast inJonesville shows ignorance and casts a slur on me. " "Oh, I meant I never had any tiffen with it, Samantha; you'll see itdon't mean plain breakfast; you'll see that they'll pass some tiffen, and we shall have to eat it no matter what it's made on, rats or miceor anything. Whoever heard of common breakfast at twelve M. ?" Well, it did mean just breakfast, and we had a real good time. We wentup in sedan chairs, though we might have gone on the cars. But wewanted to go slower to enjoy the scenery. I had thought the view from the hill back of Grout Nickleson's wuzbeautiful, and also the Pali at Honolulu, but it did seem to me thatthe seen we looked down on from the top of Victoria mountain wuz themost beautiful I ever did see. The city lay at our feet embowered intropical foliage, with its handsome uneek buildin's, its narrerwindin' streets stretchin' fur up the mountain side, runnin' intonarrerer mountain paths covered with white sand. The beautiful housesand gardens of the English colony clost down to the shore. The tallmasts of the vessels in the harbor looking like a water forest withflowers of gayly colored flags. And further off the Canton or PearlRiver, with scores of villages dotting its banks; glittering whitetemples, with their pinnacles glistening in the sunlight; pagodas, gayly painted with gilded bells, rising up from the beautiful tropicalfoliage; broad green fields; mountains soarin' up towards the blueheavens and the blue waters of the sea. A fair seen, a fair seen! I wished that sister Henzy could see it, andtold Josiah so. And he sez with a satisfied look, "Wait till I describe it to 'em, Samantha. They'd ruther have me describe it to 'em than see itthemselves. " I doubted it some, but didn't contend. The breakfast wuz a good one, though I should have called it dinner tohome. Josiah wuz on the lookout, I could see, for tiffen to be passed, but it wuzn't, so he ort to give up, but wouldn't; but argyed with meout to one side that "they wuz out of tiffen, and hadn't time to buyany and couldn't borry. " Well, the Governor-General seemed to be greatly taken with Dorothy. Arelation on his own side wuz the hostess, and Miss Meechim acted realrelieved when it turned out that he had a wife who wuz visiting inEngland. I sot at the right hand of the Governor-General and I wanted to talkto him on the opium question and try to git him to give up the trade, but concluded that I wouldn't tackle him at his own table. But I kep'up a stiddy thinkin'. That very mornin' I read in the daily paper that two missionaries hadarrived there the day before, and on the same steamer three hundredchests of opium. Poor creeters! didn't it seem mockin' the name of religion to helpconvert the natives and on the same steamer send three hundred chestsof the drug to ondo their work and make idiots and fiends of 'em. It seemed to me some as if I should read in the Jonesville "Augur" or"Gimlet" that our govermunt had sent out three or four fat lambs tohelp the starvin' poor and sent 'em in the care of thirty or fortytigers and wild cats. No doubt the lambs would git there, but they would be inside the wildcats and tigers. Such wicked and foolish and inconsistent laws if made by women wouldmake talk amongst the male sect, and I wouldn't blame 'em a mite; Ishould jine with 'em and say, "Sure enough it is a proof that wimmendon't know enough to vote and hain't good enough; let 'em drop thepolitical pole, retire into the background and study statesmanship andthe Bible, specially the golden rule. " But to resoom. Arvilly tried to turn the conversation on the "Twin Crimes" ofAmerica, but didn't come right out and canvass him, for which I wuzthankful. They all paid lots of attention to Tommy, who had a greattime, and I spoze Carabi did too. We had fruits and vegetables at the table, all gathered from theGovernor-General's garden--fresh fruit and vegetables in February, good land! Pickin' berries and pineapples while the Jonesvillians'fruit wuz snowballs and icesuckles; jest think on't! Well, Robert Strong thought we had better proceed on to Canton thenext day and we wuz all agreeable to it. After we all went back to the tarven and I had laid down a spell andrested, I went out with Arvilly and Tommy for a little walk, MissMeechim, and Dorothy, and Robert Strong havin' gone over to Maceo, theold Portuguese town on the mainland. They wanted to see the placewhere Camoens wrote his great poem, "The Lusiad, " and where he writthem heart-breakin' poems to Catarina. Poor creeters! they had to beseparated. King John sent him off from Lisbon, wantin' the girlhimself, so I spoze. Catarina died soon of a broken heart, but Camoenslived on for thirty years in the body, and is livin' now and will liveon in the Real Life fer quite a spell. Yes, his memory is jest as fresh now as it ever wuz in them streets hewandered in durin' his sad exile, while the solid stun his feet trodon has mouldered and gone to pieces, which shows how much more realthe onseen is than the seen, and how much more indestructible. Ironpillars and granite columns aginst which his weary head had leanedoft-times had all mouldered and decayed. But the onseen visions thatCamoens see with his rapt poet's eye wuz jest as fresh and deathlessas when he first writ 'em down. And his memory hanted the old streets, and went before 'em and over 'em. How much more real than the tropicalbirds that wheeled and glittered in the luxuriant tropical foliage, though they couldn't lay hands on 'em and ketch 'em and bring a few tome, much as I would liked to have had 'em. But these bein' the real, as I say, they wuz also with me way over in Hongkong. I thought asight on him all the time they wuz gone, and afterwards I thought ofthe honor and dignity his noble verse had gin to his country, and howprincely the income they had gin him after they let him return fromhis exile. Twenty-one dollars a year! What a premium that wuz uponpoesy; the Muse must have felt giddy to think she wuz prized so high, and his native land repented of the generosity afterwards and stoppedthe twenty-one dollars a year. But then after his starved and strugglin' life wuz ended his countryacted in the usual way, erected monuments in his honor, and struck offmedals bearin' his liniment. The worth of one medal or one littleornament on the peak of one of his statutes might have comforted thebroken heart and kep' alive the starved body and gin him some comfort. But that hain't the way of the world; the world has always consideredit genteel and fashionable to starve its poets, and stun its prophets, with different kinds of stuns, but all on 'em hard ones; not that ithas done so in every case, but it has always been the fashionableway. Dorothy and Robert talked quite a good deal about the sad poet and hisworks, their young hearts feelin' for his woe; mebby sunthin' in theirown hearts translatin' the mournful history; you know plates have tobe fixed jest right or the colors won't strike in. It is jest so inlife. Hearts must be ready to photograph the seens on, or they won'tbe took. Some hearts and souls are blank plates and will alwaysremain so. Arvilly seemed lost in thought as they talked about thepoet (she hain't so well versed in poetry as she is in the licenselaws and the disabilities of wimmen), and when she hearn Robert Strongsay, "Camoens will live forever, " she sez dreamily: "I wonder if he'd want to subscribe for the 'Twin Crimes'?" And sezshe, "I am sorry I didn't go over with you and canvass him. " Poorthing! she little knew he had got beyend canvassin' and all othercares and troubles of life two hundred years ago. But Miss Meechim wuzdretful worked up about the gambling going on at Maceo, and she sez itis as bad as at Monte Carlo. (I didn't know who he wuz, but spozedthat he wuz a real out and out gambler and blackleg). And sez she, "Oh, how bad it makes me feel to see such wickedness carried on. Howit makes my heart yearn for my own dear America!" Miss Meechim is goodin some things; she is as loyal to her own country as a dog to a root, but Arvilly sez: "I guess we Americans hadn't better find too much fault with foreignnatives about gambling, when we think of our stock exchanges, hugegamblin' houses where millions are gambled for daily; thousands ofbushels of wheat put up there that never wuz growed only in the mindsof the gamblers. Why, " sez Arvilly, warmin' up with her subject, "weare a nation of gamblers from Wall Street, where gamblin' is done inthe name of greed, down to meetin' houses, where bed-quilts and tidiesare gambled for in the name of religion. From millionaires who playthe game for fortunes down to poor backwoodsmen who raffle for turkeysand hens, and children who toss pennies for marbles. " Sez Miss Meechim, "I guess I will take a little quinine and lay down aspell. " Arvilly tosted her head quite a little after she retired andthen she went out to canvass a clerk in the office. Arvilly isdantless in carriage, but she is too hash. I feel bad about it. CHAPTER XV Arvilly and I went out for a walk, takin' Tommy with us. We thought wewould buy some sooveneers of the place. Sez Arvilly, "I want to proveto the Jonesvillians that I've been to China, and I want to buy somelittle presents for Waitstill Webb, that I can send her in a letter. " And I thought I would buy some little things for the children, mebby aivory croshay hook for Tirzah Ann and a paper cutter for Thomas J. , and sunthin' else for Maggie and Whitfield. It beats all whatexquisite ivory things we did see, and in silver, gold, shell, hornand bamboo, every article you can think on and lots you never didthink on, all wrought in the finest carvin' and filigree work. Embroideries in silk and satin and cloth of gold and silver, everybeautiful thing that wuz ever made you'd see in these shops. I wuz jest hesitatin' between a ivory bodkin with a butterfly head anda ivory hook with a posy on the handle, when I hearn the voice of mypardner, seemin'ly makin' a trade with somebody, and I turned a littlecorner and there I see him stand tryin' to beat down a man from Tibet, or so a bystander told me he wuz, a queer lookin' creeter, but heunderstood a few English words, and Josiah wuz buyin' sunthin' as Icould see, but looked dretful meachin and tried to conceal hispurchase as he ketched my eye. I see he wuz doin' sunthin' he ort notto do, meachinness and guilt wuz writ down on his liniment. But myaxent and mean wuz such that he produced the object and tried hard toexplain and apologize. It wuz a little prayer-wheel designed for written prayers to be put inand turned with a crank, or it could be hitched to water power or awind-mill or anything, and the owner could truly pray without ceasing. Oh how I felt as he explained! I felt that indeed the last straw wuzbein' packed onto my back, but Josiah kep' on with his apoligizin'. "You needn't look like that, Samantha; I can tell you I hain't ginup religion or thought on't. I want you to know that I am still astrong, active member of the M. E. Meetin' house, but at the sametime, " sez he, "if I--if there--spozein' there wuz, as it were, somemodifications and conveniences that would help a Christian perfessoralong, I don't know as I would be to blame to avail myself of 'em. " Sez I, "If you're guiltless what makes you look so meachin?" "Well, I most knew you wouldn't approve on it, but, " sez he, "I cantell you in a few short words what it will do. You can write yourprayers all out when you have time and put 'em into this wheel andturn it, or you can have it go by water, you can hitch it to thewindmill and have it a-prayin' while you water the cattle in themornin', and I thought, Samantha, that in hayin' time or harvestin'when I am as busy as the old Harry I could use it that way, or I couldbe a turnin' it on my way to the barn to do the chores, or I couldhitch it onto the grin'stone and Ury and I could pray for the wholefamily whilst we wuz whettin' the scythes. " "Not for me, " sez I, groanin' aloud, "not for me. " "You needn't look like that, Samantha; I tell you agin I wuzn't goin'to use it only when I wuz driv to death with work. And I tell you itwould be handy for you when you expected a houseful of company, andPhilury wuz away. " "No, indeed!" sez I; "no such wicked, wicked work will be connectedwith my prayers. " "Well, " sez Arvilly, "I d'no as it would be much wickeder than someprayers I've hearn when folks wuz in a hurry; they would run theirthanksgivin's into their petitions and them into their amens, andgallop through 'em so there wuzn't a mite of sense in 'em. Or take somuch pains to inform the Lord about things. I hearn one man say, " sezArvilly: "'O Lord, thou knowest by the morning papers, so and so. ' I d'no as aprayer turned off by a wheel would look much worse or be much lessacceptable. " Josiah looked encouraged, and sez he to me, _soty vosey_, "Arvillyalways did have good horse sense. " Sez I, "They wuzn't run by machinery--wicked, wicked way. A boughtenmachine!" sez I, shettin' up my eyes and groanin' agin. "No, " sez Josiah eagerly, "I wuz agoin' to tell you; I've got a wheelto home and a cylinder that come offen that old furnace regulator thatdidn't work, and I thought that with a little of Ury's help I couldfix one up jest as good as this, and I could sell this for twice whatI gin for it to Deacon Henzy or old Shelmadine, or rent it throughhayin' and harvestin' to the brethren, or----" Sez I, "You would disseminate these wicked practices, would you, indear Christian Jonesville? No, indeed. " "I tell you agin I wuzn't a-goin' to use it only in the most hurryin'times--I----" But I sez, "I will hear no more; give it back to the man and come withyour pardner!" And I linked my arm in hisen and motioned to the man to move off withhis wheels. And my looks wuz that dignified and lofty that I spoze itskairt him and he started off almost immegiately and to once. And I hain't hern no more about it, but don't know how much moretrouble I may have with it. No knowin' what that man may take it intohis head to do in Jonesville or China. But prayer-wheels! little did Ithink when I stood at the altar with Josiah Allen that I should haveto dicker with them. It only took six hours to sail from Hongkong up to Canton. The sceneryalong the Pearl River is not very interesting except the rice fields, banana groves with pagodas risin' amongst 'em anon or oftener, andthe strange tropical foliage, cactuses that we raise in little jarsriz up here like trees. The native villages along the ruther flat shore looked kinderdilapidated and run down, but yet they looked so different fromJonesville houses that they wuz interestin' in a way. The forts thatwe passed occasionally looked as if they would stand quite a strain. But the queerest sight wuz the floatin' houses that we had to sailthrough to land. Two hundred thousand folks live on them boats, areborn on 'em, grow up, marry, raise a family and die, all right thereon the water, just as other folks live on the land. If a young man courts a girl he takes her and her setting out, whichis mebby a extra night gown, or I don't know what they do call'em--their dresses look like night gowns. Well, she will take that anda rice kettle and go into his junk and mebby never leave it throughher life only to visit her friends. The children swarmed on them boatslike ants on a ant-hill, and they say that if they git too thick theykinder let 'em fall overboard, not push 'em off, but kinder let 'em goaccidental like, specially girls, they kinder encourage girls fallin'off. And the Chinese think that it is wrong to save life. If any oneis drownin', for instance, they think that it is the will of thehigher Power and let 'em go. But they look down on girls dretfully. Ifyou ask a Chinaman how many children he has got he will say "Twochildren and two piecee girl. " Jest as if boys was only worthy to becalled children, and girls a piece of a child. Miss Meechim wuzindignant when that way of theirs wuz mentioned; she considers herselfas good if not better than one man and a half. Sez she: "The idee ofcalling a boy a child, and a girl a piece of a child, or words thatmean that. " But Arvilly sez, "Well, how much better is it in the United States--ormost of 'em? Girls don't even have the comfort of thinkin' thatthey're a piece of a person; they're just nothin' at all in the eyesof the law--unless the law wants to tax 'em to raise money. " Sez she, "I would be thankful 'lection day if I wuz a piece of a woman, so thatfive or six of us would make a hull citizen. " Miss Meechim had neverthought on't before, she said she hadn't, but nobody could git her tosay a word aginst American customs no more than they could aginstherself. She thinks that she and America are perfect, but puts herselffirst. Well, America is the best land under the sun; I've always saidso. But I feel towards it as I do towards Josiah: what faults it has Iwant to talk it out of, so that it will stand up perfect among nationsas Josiah could amongst men if he would hear to me. Arvilly likes tostir Miss Meechim up; I believe she sez things a purpose sometimes toset Miss Meechim off; but then Arvilly talks from principle, too, andshe is real cute. There wuz all sorts of boats, theatre junks and concert junks andplain junks, and Josiah wuz dretful took with this floatin' city, andsez to once that he should build a house boat as soon as he gothome--he and Ury. He said that he could use the old hay-rack to startit--that and the old corn-house would most make it. "Where will you put it?" sez I. "Oh, on the creek or the canal, " sez he. "It will be so uneek for usto dwell when we want to, on the briny deep. " "I guess there hain't much brine in the creek or the canal, " Josiah. "Well, I said that for poetical purposes. But you know that it wouldbe very stylish to live in a boat, and any time we wanted to, whenonexpected company wuz comin', or the tax collector or book agent, jest hist the sail and move off, it would be dretful handy as well asstylish. " "Well, well, " sez I, "you can't build it till you git home. " I feltthat he would forgit it before then. Arvilly looked thoughtfully at'em and wondered how she wuz goin' to canvass 'em, and if they woulddo as Josiah intimated if they see her comin'. Miss Meechim wonderedif they could git to meetin' in time, they seemed to move so slow, and Robert Strong said to Dorothy: "Well, a poor man can feel that he owns the site his home stands on, as well as the rich man can, and that would be a hopeless attempt forhim in our large American cities, and he can't be turned out of hishome by some one who claims the land. " And Tommy wondered how the little boys could play ball, and if theydidn't want to slide down hill, or climb trees, or pick berries, andso on and so on. And every one on us see what wuz for us to see in themovin' panoramy. Canton is a real queer city. The streets are so narrer that you canalmost reach out your hands and touch the houses on both sides, theyare not more than seven or eight feet wide. There are no horses inCanton, and you have to git about on "shanks's horses, " as Josiahcalls it, your own limbs you know, or else sedan chairs, and thestreets are so narrer, some on 'em, that once when we met some bigChinese man, a Mandarin I believe they called him, we had to hurryinto one of the shops till he got by, and sometimes in turnin' acorner the poles of our chairs had to be run way inside of the shops, and Josiah said: "I would like to see how long the Jonesvillians would stand suchdoin's; I would like to see old Gowdey's fills scrapin' my cook stove, it is shiftless doin's, and ort to be stopped. " But I knew he couldn't make no change and I hushed him up as well as Icould. Robert Strong got quite a comfortable tarven for us to stay in. But I wuz so afraid all the time of eatin' rats and mice that Icouldn't take any comfort in meat vittles. They do eat rats there, forI see 'em hangin' in the markets with their long tails curled up, ready to bile or fry. Josiah said he wished he had thought on't, hewould brung out a lot to sell, and he wuz all rousted up to try tomake a bargain to supply one of these shops with rats and mice. Sezhe: "It will be clear profit, Samantha, for I want to get rid on 'em, andall the Jonesvillians do, and if I can sell their carcasses I willthrow in the hide and taller. Why, I can make a corner on rats andmice in Jonesville; I can git 'em by the wagon load of the farmers andgit pay at both ends. " But I told him that the freightage would eat upthe profits, and he see it would, and gin up the idee onwillin'ly. Though I don't love such hot stuff as we had to eat, curry, and redpeppers, and chutney, not to home I don't, but I see it wuz better toeat such food there on account of the climate. Some of our party hadto take quinine, too, for the stomach's sake to keep up, for you feelthere like faintin' right away, the climate is such. It must be that the Chinese like amusements, for we see sights oftheatres and concert rooms and lanterns wuz hangin' everywhere andbells. And there wuz streets all full of silk shops, and weavers, andjewelry, and cook shops right open on either side. All the colors ofthe rainbow and more too you see in the silks and embroideries, andjewelry of all kinds and swingin' signs and mat awnings overhead, andthe narrer streets full of strange lookin' folks, in their strangelookin' dresses. We visited a joss house, and a Chinaman's paradise where opium eatersand smokers lay in bunks lookin' as silly and happy as if theywouldn't ever wake up agin to their tawdy wretchedness. We visited asilk manufactory, a glass blowing shop. We see a white marble pagodawith several tiers of gilded bells hangin' on the outside. Inside itwuz beautifully ornamented, some of the winders wuz made of the insideof oyster shells; they made a soft, pleasant light, and it had anumber of idols made of carved ivory and some of jade stun, and theprincipal idol wuz a large gilded dragon. Josiah said the idee of worshippin' such a looking creeter as that. Sez he, "I should ruther worship our old gander. " And Miss Meechim wuzhorrified, too, at the wickedness of the Chinese in worshippin'idols. But Arvilly walked around it with her head up, and said that Americaworshipped an idol that looked enough sight worse than that and amillion times worse actin'. Sez she, "This idol will stay where it isput, it won't rare around and murder its worshippers. " And Miss Meechim sez coldly, "I don't know what you mean; I know thatI am an Episcopalian and worship as our beautiful creed dictates. " Sez Arvilly, "Anybody that sets expediency before principle, from aking to a ragpicker; any one who cringes to a power he knows is vileand dangerous, and protects and extends its influence from greed andambition, such a one worships a far worse idol than this peaceable, humbly-lookin' critter and looks worse to me enough sight. " I hearn Miss Meechim say out to one side to Dorothy, "How sick I am ofhearing her constant talk against intemperance; from California toChina I have had to hear it. And you know, Dorothy, that folks candrink genteel. " But Dorothy, with her sweet lips trembling and her white dimpled chinquivering, sez, "I should think we had suffered enough from theWhiskey Power, Auntie, to hear anything said against it, and at anytime. " And Robert Strong jined in with Dorothy, and so Miss Meechim subsided, and I see a dark shadder creep over her face, too, and tears come intoher pale blue eyes. She hain't forgot Aronette, poor little victim!Crunched and crushed under the wheels of the monster JuggernautAmerica rolls round to crush its people under. I wuz some likeArvilly. When I thought of that I didn't feel to say so much aginstthem foreign idols, though they wuz humbly lookin' as I ever see. Andspeakin' of idols, one day we see twelve fat hogs in a temple, wherethey wuz kept as sacred animals, and here agin Miss Meechim wuzhorrified and praised up American doin's, and run down China, and aginArvilly made remarks. Sez she: "The hogs there wallowing in their filth are poor lookin' things tokneel down and worship, but they're shut up here with priests to tendto 'em; they can't git out to roam round and entice innocents intotheir filthy sties and perpetuate their swinish lives, and that ismore than we can say of the American beastly idols, or our priesthoodwho fatten them and themselves and then let 'em out to rampage roundand act. " Miss Meechim sithed deep and remarked to me "that the tariff laws wuza absorbin' topic to her mind at that time. " She did it to change thesubject. We went to a Chinese crematory and the Temple of Longevity, where ifyou paid enough you could git a promise of long life. Josiah is clost, but he gin quite a good deal for him, and wuz told that he would liveto be one hundred and twenty-seven years of age. He felt well. Ofcourse we had a interpreter with is who talked for us. Josiah wantedme to pay, too, for a promise. Sez he with a worried look: "I shall be wretched as a widower, Samantha; do patronize 'em, I hadruther save on sunthin' else than this. " So to please him I gin 'em a little more than he did, and theyguaranteed me one hundred and forty years, and then Josiah worriedagin and wanted me to promise not to marry agin after he wuz gone. Heworships me. And I told him that if I lived to be a hundred and fortyI guessed I shouldn't be thinkin' much about marryin', and he lookedeasier in his mind. One day we met a weddin' procession, most a mild long, I should say. The bride wuz ahead in her sedan chair, her dress wuz richlyembroidered and spangled, a veil fringed with little pearls hung overher face. Pagodas with tinkling gilt bells, sedan chairs full of silkand cloth and goods of all kinds wuz carried in the procession bycoolies. Idols covered with jade and gilt jewelry, a company of littlechildren beatin' tom-toms and gongs, and the stuffed bodies of animalsall ornamented with gilt and red paper riggers wuz carried, and atthe tail end of the procession come the friends of the family. The bridegroom wuzn't there, he wuz waitin' to hum in his own or hisfather's house for the bride he'd never seen. But if the bride's feetwuz not too large he would most likely be suited. Miss Meechim said, "Poor young man! to have to take a wife he hasnever seen; how widely different and how immeasurably better are suchthings carried on in America. " Sez Arvilly, "What bridegroom ever did see his bride as she reallywuz? Till the hard experience of married life brought out her hiddentraits, good and bad? Or what wife ever see her husband's real temperand character until after years of experience?" Sez I, "That's so; leaves are turned over in Josiah Allen's mind nowas long as we've been pardners that has readin' on 'em as strange tome as if they wuz writ in Chinese or Japan. " But then it must be admitted that not to see your wife's face and knowwhether she's cross-eyed or snub-nosed is tryin'. But they say it isaccordin' to the decree of Feng Shui, and therefore they accept itwillingly. They have a great variety of good fruit in Canton--somethat I never see before--but their vegetables don't taste so good asours, more stringy and watery, and their eggs they want buried sixmonths before usin' 'em. I believe that sickened me of China as muchas anything. But then some folks at home want their game kep' till ithain't fit to eat in my opinion. But eggs! they should be like Cæsar'swife, above suspicion--the idee of eatin' 'em with their shells allblue and spotted with age--the idee! CHAPTER XVI We wuz all invited one day to dine with a rich Chinaman Robert Stronghad got acquainted with in San Francisco. Arvilly didn't want to go, and offered to keep Tommy with her, and the rest of us went. The housewuz surrounded with a high wall, and we entered through a small doorin this wall, and went into a large hall openin' on a courtyard. Thehost met us and we set down on a raised seat covered with red clothunder some big, handsome lanterns that wuz hung over our heads. Servants with their hair braided down their backs and with gay dresseson brought in tea--as good as any I ever drank--and pipes. Josiahwhispered to me: "How be I agoin' to smoke tobacco, Samantha? It will make me sick asdeath. You know I never smoked anything but a little catnip and mullenfor tizik. I wonder if he's got any catnip by him; I'm goin' to ask. " But I kep' him from it, and told him that we could just put the stemsin our mouths, and pretend to smoke enough to be polite. "Hypocrasy, " sez Josiah, "don't become a deacon in high standin'. If Ipretend to smoke I shall smoke, and take a good pull. " And he leanedback and shut his eyes and took his pipe in his hand, and I guess hedrawed on it more than he meant to, for he looked bad, sickish andwhite round his mouth as anything. But we all walked out into thegarden pretty soon and he looked resuscitated. It was beautiful there; rare flowers and exotics of all kinds, treesthat I never see before and lots that I had seen, sparklin' fountainswith gold fish, grottos all lit up by colored lanterns, and littlemarble tablets with wise sayings. Josiah said he believed they wuzducks' tracks, and wondered how ducks ever got up there to make 'em, but the interpreter read some on 'em to us and they sounded firstrate. Way up on a artificial rock, higher than the Jonesville steeple, wuz a beautiful pavilion with gorgeous lanterns in it and beautifulbronzes and china. In the garden wuz growin' trees, trimmed all sorts of shapes, some on'em wuz shaped like bird cages and birds wuz singin' inside of 'em. There wuz one like a jinrikisha with a horse attached, all growin', and one like a boat, and two or three wuz pagodas with gilt bellshangin' to 'em, another wuz shaped like a dragon, and some like fishand great birds. It wuz a sight to see 'em, all on 'em a growin', andsome on 'em hundreds of years old. Josiah says to me: "If I ever live to git home I will surprise Jonesville. I will haveour maple and apple trees trimmed in this way if I live. How uneek itwill be to see the old snow apple tree turned into a lumber wagon, andthe pound sweet into a corn house, and the maples in front of thehouse you might have a couple on 'em turned into a Goddess of Libertyand a statter of Justice, you are such a hand for them two females, "sez he. "Of course we should have to use cloth for Justice's eyebandages, and her steelyards I believe Ury and I could trim out, though they might not weigh jest right to the notch. " And I sez, "Justice has been used to that, to not weighin' thingsright, it wouldn't surprise her. " But I told him it would be sights ofwork and mebby he'll give it up. Soon afterwards we wuz all invited to dinner in this same house. Andso ignorant are the Chinese of Jonesville ways that at a dinner theplace of honor is at the left instead of the right of the host. Everything that can be in China is topsy tervy and different from us. I wuz chose for that honorable place at the left of our host. We allstood for quite a while, for it is China table etiquette to try tomake the guest next to us set down first, but finally we all sot downsimiltaneous and at the same time. Josiah thinks that it is becauseChina is right down under us the reason that she gits so turned overand strange actin', but 'tennyrate, endin' our dinner as we do withsweets, it didn't surprise me that we begun our dinner by havin'sweetmeats passed, each one helpin' ourselves with chop sticks, queerthings to handle as I ever see, some like the little sticks I haveseen niggers play tunes with. Josiah seemed to enjoy hisen the bestthat ever wuz, and to my horrow he took both on 'ern in his right handand begun to play Yankee Doodle on 'em. I stepped on his foot hard under the table, and he broke off with alow groan, but I spoze they would lay it to a foreigner's strangeways. After the sweetmeats wuz partook of we had dried melon seeds, the host handin' 'em round by the handful. Josiah slipped his into hispocket. I wuz mortified enough, but he said: "Of course he wants us to plant 'em; nobody but a fool would expect usto eat melon seeds or horse feed. " I wuz glad Josiah didn't speak in China, I guess they didn'tunderstand him. A rice-wine wuz passed with this, which of course Idid not partake of. Much as I wanted to be polite I could not let thischance pass of holdin' up my temperance banner. I had seen enoughtrouble caused by folks in high station not holdin' up temperanceprinciples at banquets, and I wuzn't to be ketched in the same way, soI waived it off with a noble and lofty jester, but Miss Meechimdrinked wine every time it wuz passed, and she got real tonguey beforewe went home, and her eyes looked real kinder glassy--glassier than aperfessor's eyes ort to look. Then we had bird's-nest soup, which isone of the most costly luxuries to be had in Canton. They are found onprecipitous rocks overhanging the sea, and one must risk his life toget them. It didn't taste any better to me than a chip. It seemed tobe cut in little square yeller pieces, kind of clear lookin', somelike preserved citron only it wuz lighter colored, and Josiahwhispered to me: "We can have bird's-nest soup any day to hum, Samantha. Jest think ofthe swaller's nest in the barn and robin's nest and crow's nest, whyone crow's nest would last us a week. " "It would last a lifetime, Josiah, if I had to cook it; sticks andstraw. " "Well, it would be real uneek to cook one, or a hornet's nest, andwould be a rarity for the Jonesvillians, and in the winter, if we runout of bird's-nest, you could cook a hen's nest. " But I sez, "Keep still, Josiah, and let's see what we'll have next. " Well, we had ham, fish, pigeon's eggs and some things I didn't knowthe name of. The host took up a little mess of sunthin' on his chopstick and handed it to me. I dassent refuse it, for he meant it as ahonor, but I most know it wuz rat meat, but couldn't tell for certain. I put my shoulder blades to the wheel and swallered it, but it wentdown hard. Bowls of rice wuz passed round last. Between the courses we had thebest tea I ever tasted of; only a few of the first leaves that open onthe tea plant are used for this kind of tea, and a big field would begone over for a pound of it. After it is cured it is flavored with thetea blossom. I had spozed I had made good tea to home on my own hotwater tank, and drinked it, but I gin up that I had never tasted teabefore. On our way home we went through the Street of Benevolence and I wuzashamed to run Miss Meechim in my mind. They name their streets real funny; one street is called EverlastingLove, or it means that in our language, and there is RefreshingBreezes, Reposing Dragons, Honest Gain, Thousand Grandsons, HeavenlyHappiness, and etc. , etc. Josiah said that he should see Uncle Sime Bentley and Deacon Henzyabout naming over the Jonesville streets the minute he got home. Sezhe, "How uneek it will be to trot along through Josiah's Never EndingSuccess, or Prosperous Interesting Josiah, or the Glorious Pathmaster, or the Divine Travellin' Deacon, or sunthin' else uneek and wellmeanin'. " Sez I, "You seem to want to name 'em all after yourself, Josiah. UncleSime and Deacon Henzy would probable want one or two named afterthem. " "Well, " sez he, "we could name one Little Uncle, and one Spindlin'Deacon, if they insisted on't. " Josiah wuz in real good sperits, I laid it partly to the tea, it wuzreal stimulating; Josiah said that it beat all that the Chinese wuz soblinded and out of the way as to do things so different from what theydid in Jonesville. "But, " sez he, "they're politer on the outside thanthe Jonesvillians, even down to the coolers. " Sez I, "Do you mean the coolies?" "Yes, the coolers, the hired help, you know, " sez he. "Catch Uryfixin' his eye on his left side coat collar when he speaks to me notdastin' to lift it, and bowin' and scrapin' when I told him to go andhitch up, or bring in a pail of water, and catch him windin' his hairin a wod when he wuz out by himself and then lettin' it down his backwhen he came to wait on me. " Sez I, "Ury's hair is too short to braid. " "Well, you can spozen the case, can't you? But as I wuz sayin', forall these coolers are so polite, I would trust Ury as fur agin as Iwould any on 'em. And then they write jest the other way from we do inJonesville, begin their letters on the hind side and write towards'em; and so with planin' a board, draw the plane towards 'em. I wouldlike to see Ury try that on any of my lumber. And because weJonesvillians wear black to funerals, they have to dress in white. Plow would I looked at my mother-in-law's funeral with a white nightgown on and my hair braided down my back with a white ribbin on it?It would have took away all the happiness of the occasion to me. "And then their language, Samantha, it is fixed in such a fool waythat when they want a word different, they yell up the same wordlouder and that makes it different, as if I wuz to say to Ury kinderlow and confidential, 'I shall be the next president, Ury;' and then Ishould yell up the same words a little louder and that would mean, 'Feed the brindle steer;' there hain't no sense in it. But I spoze onething that ails them is their havin' to stand bottom side up, theirfeet towards Jonesville. Their blood runs the wrong way. Mebby Ishouldn't do any better than they do if I stood so the hull of thetime; mebby I should let my finger nails grow out like bird's clawsand shake my own hands when I meet company instead of theirn. Though, "sez Josiah, dreamily, "I don't know but I shall try that inJonesville; I may on my return from my travels walk up to ElderMinkley and the bretheren in the meetin'-house, and pass thecompliments with 'em and clasp my own hands and shake 'em quite aspell, not touchin' their hands. I may, but can't tell for certain; itwould be real uneek to do it. " "Well, " sez I, "Josiah, every country has its own strange ways; wehave ourn. " Sez he, "How you would scold me if I wuz to wear my hat when we hadcompany, and here it is manners to do it, and take off your specs. Whyshould I take off my specs to meet Elder Minkley?" "Well, " sez I, "there hain't anything out of the way in it, if theywant to. " Sez Josiah, "You seem to take to China ways so, you and Arvilly, thatI spoze mebby you'll begin to bandage your feet when you git home, andtoddle round on your big toes. " And I sez, "I d'no but I'd jest as soon do that as to girt myself downwith cossets, or walk round with a trailin' dress wipin' up all thefilth of the streets to carry home to make my family sick. " But it is a awful sight. I had the chance right there in Canton to seea foot all bound up to make it the fashionable size. The four small toes wuz twisted right under the ankle, and the broken, crushed bones of the foot pressed right up where the instep should be. The pain must have been sunthin' terrible, and very often a toe dropsoff, but I spoze they are glad of that, for it would make the littlelump of dead flesh they call their feet smaller. They wear brightsatin shoes, all embroidered and painted, and their little pantelettescover all but the very end of the toe. They all, men and wimmen, weara loose pair of trowsers which they call the foo, and a kind of jacketwhich they call a sham. "A fool and a sham, " Josiah called 'em all the time. The wimmen havetheir hair all stuck up with some kind of gum, making it as good as abunnet, but I would fur ruther have the bunnet. Sometimes they wear ahandkerchief over it. Wimmen hain't shut up here as they are inTurkey, but no attention is paid to their education and they arelooked down on. Men seem to be willin' to have wimmen enjoy whatreligion they can, such as they have. But her husband won't let herset to the table with him, and he can whip her to death and not betouched for it, but if she strikes back a single blow he can get adivorce from her. I thought wimmen wuz worse off here than they wuz in America, butArvilly argyed that our govermunt sold stuff and took pay for it thatmade men beat their wives, and sold the right to make wicked wimmenand keep 'em so, and took wimmen's tax money to keep up such laws. Andshe went over such a lot of unjust laws that I didn't know but she wuzright, and that we wuz jest about as bad off in some things. Theymarry dretful young in China. Little babies are engaged to be marriedright whilst they're teethin', but they can't marry I guess till theyare ten or twelve years old. From Canton we went back to Hongkong, intendin' to go from there toCalcutta. But Dorothy felt that she must see Japan while she wuz sonear, and we concluded to go, though it wuz goin' right out of our wayin the opposite direction from Jonesville. But when Dorothy expresseda wish Robert Strong seemed to think it wuz jest as bindin' on him asthe law of the Medes and Persians, whatever they may be, and MissMeechim felt so too, so though as I say it wuz some as though I shouldgo to she that wuz Submit Tewksberrys round by the widder Slimpsey'sand Brother Henzy's. We found some mail here to the tarven, lettersfrom the dear children and our help. Thomas J. And Maggie wuz gittin'better, and the rest well, and all follerin' our journey with fondhearts and good wishes. Philury and Ury writ that everything was goin'well on the farm and the Jonesvillians enjoyin' good health. Arvillygot a paper from Jonesville and come in to read it to us. It had beena long time on the road. It said that a new bill was a-goin' to beintroduced to allow wimmen to vote, but she didn't seem to beencouraged about it much. Sez she: "The law won't do anything aboutthat as long as it is so busy grantin' licenses to kill folks viaSaloon and other houses of death and ruin and canals and trusts andmonopolies to protect to steal the people's money. " But I sez, "I do hope the bill will pass for the sake of Justice, ifnothin' else. Justice, " sez I, "must have been so shamed to see suchthings goin' on that she wuz glad she wore bandages over her eyes; andher hands have shook so she hain't weighed even for some time; to seeher sect taxed without representation, punished and hung by laws shehas no voice in makin'. " Josiah sez, "I admit that that is ruther hard, Samantha, but thathain't the nick on't. The pint is that wimmen hain't got theself-control that men has. The govermunt is afraid of her emotionalnater; she gits wrought up too quick. She is good as gold, almost aangel, in fact, as we male voters have always said. But she is toohasty; she hain't got the perfect calmness, the firm onmovable senseof right and wrong, the patience and long sufferin' that we men have;she flies off too sudden one way or t'other; govermunt well fears shewould be a dangerous element in the body politick. " Jest as Josiah finished this remark Arvilly read out a thrillin'editorial about the war between Russia and Japan; the editor commentedon the wickedness of men plungin' two great empires into warfare, slaughterin' thousands and thousands of men, bringin' ontoldwretchedness, distress, pestilence and destitution just to gratifyambition or angry passion. For it wuz this, he said, in the firstplace, whatever it became afterward. A war of defence, of course, argued an aggressor, and he talkedeloquent about Courts of Arbitration which would do away with thewholesale butchery and horror of war. And he called eloquent on Peaceto fly down on her white wings bearing the olive branch, to come andstop this unutterable woe and crime of war. (Arvilly left off readin' to remind Josiah that Peace wuz alwaysdepictered as a female, and then resoomed her readin'. ) In conclusion, the editor lamented the fact that in the annals of ournation men so often forgot the Golden Rule and gin vent to voylentpassions and onbecomin' behavior. Sez Josiah, "I guess I will take Tommy and go out for a little walk, Samantha, I feel kinder mauger. " "I should think you would!" sez Arvilly, lookin' hull reams of by-lawsand statutes at him. And I sez, "Whilst you're walkin', dear Josiah, you might meditate onthe danger to the govermunt from wimmen's emotional nature, and thepatience and long sufferin' of men voters. " I said it real tender andgood, but he snapped me up real snappish. Sez he, "I shall meditate on what I'm a minter. Come, Tommy, " and theywent out. CHAPTER XVII And the next day we started for Yokohama. I had felt kinder dubersomeabout goin' through countries that wuz plunged in a great war, but wegot along all right, nobody shot at us or made any move to, and wedidn't see anybody hurt. But knowed that the warfare wuz ragin' awaysomewhere out of our sight. Death wuz marchin' along on his pale horse in front of the army, andhearts wuz breakin' and the light of the sun and of life darkened inthousands and thousands of grand and humble homes. I felt dretful when I thought on't, but hain't goin' to harrow up thereader's feelin's talkin' about it, knowin' it won't do any good, andanyway they've all read the particulars in the daily papers. Well, we reached Yokohama with no fatal casualties to report, thoughmy pardner wuz real seasick, but brightened up as we drew nigh toshore. Here and there a little village with quaint houses could beseen, and anon a temple or shrine riz up above the beautiful tropicalfoliage and further off the Fujiyama, the sacred mountain, riz upabove the other mountains. We come into the harbor about half-past three and arrove at our tarvenabout five. When we drew nigh the shore almost naked boatmen come outto meet us in their sampans, as they call their little boats (Josiahcalled 'em "sass pans" right to their face, but I don't spoze theyunderstood it). They wuz to take us into the shore and they wuzyellin' to each other fearful as they pushed their boats ahead. Theirtoilettes consisted mostly of figgers pricked into their skins, dragons and snakes seemed their favorite skin ornaments, the color wuzblue mostly with some red. Josiah sez to me as we looked down on 'emfrom the dock: "Them coolers wouldn't have to carry a Saratoga trunk with 'em whenthey travel; a bottle of ink and a pin would last 'em through life. "It wuz a real hot day, and Josiah continered, "Well, their clothin' iscomfortable anyway, that's why they are called coolers, becausethey're dressed so cool, " and, sez he, "what a excitement I could makein Jonesville next summer in dog-days by introducin' this fashion. " I looked on him in horrow, and he added hastily, "Oh, I should wear ashort tunic, Samantha, comin' down most to my knees, with tossels onit, and I shouldn't wear snakes or dragons on my skin, I should wearsome texts of Scripter, or appropriate quotations, as Josiah the fair, or Josiah the pride of Jonesville, runnin' down my legs and arms, andI shouldn't have 'em pricked in, I could have 'em painted in gaycolors. " "Oh, heavens!" sez I, lookin' up to the sky, "what won't I hear nextfrom this man!" "I hadn't said I should do it, Samantha; and 'tennyrate it would beonly through dog-days. I said what a excitement it would make if Iconcluded to do it. " Sez I, "It is a excitement that would land you in Jonesville jail, andort to. " But at that minute Arvilly and Miss Meechim come up to us and brokeoff the conversation. Japan boatmen jest wear a cloth round theirloins, and some of 'em had a little square of matting fastened by arope round their necks to keep the rain offen their backs. After goin' through the custom house, where we got off easy, we wentto a tarven called the Grand Hotel and had a good night's rest. CHAPTER XVIII The next mornin', after tiffen, which wuz what they call breakfast, bein' just so ignorant of good Jonesville language, Josiah and I andTommy sallied out to see what we could see, the rest of our partyhavin' gone out before. Wantin' to go a considerable ways, we hired two jinrikishas, and Itook Tommy in my lap, and I must say that I felt considerable like ababy in a baby carriage carryin' a doll; but I got over it and feltlike a grandma before I had gone fur. How Josiah felt I don't know, though I hearn him disputin' with the man about his prices--we hadtook a interpreter with us so we could know what wuz said to us. Theprice for a jinrikisha is five sen, and Josiah thought it meant fivecents of our money, and so handed it to him. But the man wuz soignorant he didn't know anything about Jonesville money, and he kep'a-callin' for sen, and the interpreter sez "Sen, " holdin' up his fivefingers and speakin' it up loud, and I hearn Josiah say: "Well, you fool, you, I have given you five cents! What more do youwant?" But at last he wuz made to understand; but when Josiah made himknow where he wanted to go the interpreter said that the sedancarriers wanted a yen, and my poor pardner had another struggle. Sezhe: "You consarned fool, how do you spoze I can give you a hen? Do youspoze I can git into my hen house ten thousand milds off to git you ahen? Or do you want me to steal one for you?" "A yen, " sez the interpreter, and the way he said it it did sound likehen. "Well, I said hen, didn't I?" said my pardner. But I leaned out of my baby cart and sez, "Y-e-n, Josiah. A yen istheir money, a dollar. " "Oh, why don't they call it a cow or a brindle calf?" He wuz all hetup by his efforts to understand. They call one of their dollars a yen, a sen is a cent, and a rin is the tenth part of a cent. Josiah fell inlove with the copper rins with square holes in the centre. Sez he: "How I would love to furnish you with 'em, Samantha, when you went tothe store in Jonesville. I would hand you out five or six rins and youcould string 'em and wear 'em round your neck till you got to thestore. " "Yes, " sez I, "half a cent would go a good ways in buyin' familystores. " "Well, it would have a rich look, Samantha, and I mean to make somewhen I git home. Why, Ury and I could make hundreds of 'em out of ourold copper kettle that has got a hole in it, and I shouldn't wonder ifI could pass 'em. " Miss Meechim had a idee that the Japans wuz in a state of barbarism, but Arvilly who wuz always at swords' pints with her threw such a lotof statistics at her that it fairly danted her. There are six hundrednewspapers in Japan. The Japanese daily at Tokio has a circulation of300, 000. She has over 3, 000 milds of railroads and uses the Americansystem of checking baggage. Large factories with the best machineryhas been built late years, but a great part of the manufacturing isdone by the people in their own homes, where they turn out thoseexquisite fabrics of silk and cotton and rugs of all the colors of therainbow, and seemingly as fadeless as that bow. Slavery is unknown, and there is very little poverty with all the crowded population. TheJapans are our nearest neighbors acrost the Pacific and we've beenpretty neighborly with 'em, havin' bought from 'em within the last tenyears most three hundred millions worth of goods. She would miss us ifanything should happen to us. Yokohama is a city of 124, 000 inhabitants, most all Japans, though inwhat they call the settlement there are fifteen or twenty thousandforeigners. There are beautiful homes here with flower gardenscontaining the rarest and most beautiful flowers, trees and shrubs ofall kinds. The day Josiah had his struggle with the interpreter and Japan moneywe rode down the principal streets of Yokohama. And I would stop atsome of the silk shops, though Josiah objected and leaned out of hisjinrikisha and sez anxiously: "Don't spend more'n half a dozen rins, Samantha, on dress, for youknow we've got more than 10, 000 milds to travel and the tarven billsare high. " Sez I in real dry axents, "If I conclude to buy a dress I shall haveto have as much as a dozen rins; I don't believe that I could git ahandsome and durable one for less. " My tone was sarcastical. The ideeof buyin' a silk dress for half a cent! But I didn't lay out to buy; Iwuz jest lookin' round. I saw in those shops some of the most beautiful silks and embroideriesthat I ever did see, and I went into a lacquer shop where there wuzthe most elegant furniture and rich bronzes inlaid with gold andsilver. They make the finest bronzes in the world; a little pair ofvases wuz fifteen hundred dollars and you couldn't get 'em for less. But why shouldn't there be beautiful things in a country where everyone is a artist? We stopped at a tea house and had a cup of tea, delicious as I neverspozed tea could be and served by pretty young girls with gay colored, loose silk suits and hair elaborately dressed up with chains andornaments; their feet and legs wuz bare, but they wuz covered withornaments of brass and jade. Afterwards we passed fields of rice wheremen and wimmen wuz working, the men enrobed in their skin toilette ofdragons and other figures and loin cloth and the wimmen in littlescanty skirts comin' from the waist to the knees. Their wages areeight cents a day. I wondered what some of our haughty kitchen rulers, who demand a dollar a day and the richest of viands would say if theywuz put down on a basis of eight cents a day and water and rice diet. The little bamboo cottages are lovely lookin' from the outside withtheir thatched roofs, some on 'em with little bushes growin' out onthe thatch and little bunches of grass growin' out under the eaves. The children of the poor are entirely naked and don't have a rag on'em until they're ten or twelve. A lot of 'em come up to thejinrikishas and called out "oh-hi-o" to Josiah, and he shook his headand sez affably: "No, bub, I'm from Jonesville. " But the interpreter explained oh-hi-o means good mornin'; and afterthat for days Josiah would say to me as soon as I waked up, "Ohio, "and wanted to say it to the rest, but I broke it up. One thing Josiah thought wuz wicked: a Japanese is not allowed to wearwhiskers till he is a grandpa, so old bachelors have to go with smoothfaces. Sez Josiah, "What if Cousin Zebedee Allen couldn't wear whiskers?Why, " sez he, "his whiskers are his main beauty, and naterally Zeb ismore particular about his looks than if he wuz married. Such laws arewicked and arbitrary. Why, when I courted my first wife, Samantha, mywhiskers and my dressy looks wuz what won the day. And I d'no, " sez heinquiringly, "but they won your heart. " "No, " sez I, "it wuzn't them, and heaven only knows what it wuz; Inever could tell. I've wondered about it a sight. " "Well, " sez he, "I didn't know but it wuz my whiskers. " We passed a number of temples where the people worship. The twoprincipal religions are the Shinto and the Buddhist. The Shinto means, "The way of the gods, " and they believe that their representative isthe Mikado, so of course they lay out to worship him. The Buddhistspreach renunciation, morality, duty, and right living. Bein' such acase to cling to Duty's apron strings I couldn't feel towards theBuddhists as Miss Meechim did. Sez she, "Oh, why can't they believe aswe do in America? Why can't they all be Episcopalians?" But 'tennyrate all religions are tolerated here, and as Arvilly toldMiss Meechim when she wuz bewailin' the fact that they wuzn't allEpiscopals and wuzn't more like our country. Sez Arvilly, "They don't drownd what they call witches, nor hangQuakers, nor whip Baptists, nor have twenty wives. It don't dofor us to find too much fault with the religion of other nations, Miss Meechim, specially them that teaches the highest morality, self-control and self-sacrifice. " Miss Meechim was huffy, but Arvilly drove the arrer home. "Gamblin' isprohibted here; you wouldn't be allowed gamble for bed-quilts andafghans at church socials, Miss Meechim. " Miss Meechim wouldn't say a word. I see she wuz awful huffy. Buthowsumever there are lots of people here who believe in the Christianreligion. We passed such cunning little farms; two acres is called a good farm, and everything seemed to be growin' on it in little squares, kep' neatand clean, little squares of rice and wheat and vegetables. And Josiah sez, "I wonder what Ury would say if I should set him totransplantin' a hull field of wheat, spear by spear, as they do here, set 'em out in rows as we do onions. And I guess he'd kick if I shouldhitch him onto the plow to plow up a medder, or onto the mower orreaper. I guess I'd git enough of it. I guess he'd give me mycome-up-ance. " "Not if he wuz so polite as the Japans, " sez I. "And what a excitement it would make in Jonesville, " sez Josiah, "if Ishould hitch Ury and Philury onto the mowin' machine. I might, " hecontinered dreamily, "just for a change, drive 'em into Jonesvilleonce on the lumber wagon. " But he'll forgit it, I guess, and Japan will forgit it too beforelong. Their tools are poor and fur behind ourn, and some of their waysare queer; such as trainin' their fruit trees over arbors as we dovines. Josiah wuz dretful took with this and vowed he'd train our oldsick no further over a arbor. Sez he, "If I can train that old treeinto a runnin' vine I shall be the rage in Jonesville. " But he can't do it. The branches are as thick as his arm. And I sez, "Children and trees have to be tackled young, Josiah, to bend theirwills the way you want 'em to go. " They make a great fuss here overthe chrysantheum, and they are beautiful, I must admit. They don'tlook much like mine that I have growin' in a kag in the east winder. Their common fruits are the persimmons, a sweet fruit about as big asa tomato and lookin' some like it, with flat black seeds, pears, goodfigs, oranges, peaches, apples. There is very little poverty, and thepoorest people are very clean and neat. Their law courts don't dallyfor month after month and years. If a man murders they hang him thesame week. But mebby our ways of lingerin' along would be better in some cases, if new evidence should be found within a year or so, or childrenshould grow up into witnesses. We went into a Japanese house one day. It is made on a bamboo frame, the roof and sides wuz thatched with rye straw, the winders wuzslidin' frames divided into little squares covered with thin whitepaper. The partitions wuz covered with paper, and movable, so youcould if you wanted to make your house into one large room. Josiahtold me that he should tear out every partition in our house and fix'em like this. "How handy it would be, Samantha, if I ever wanted topreach. " And I told him that I guessed our settin' room would hold all thatwould come to hear him preach, and sez I, "How would paper walls dowith the thermometer forty below zero?" He looked frustrated, he hadnever thought of that. The house we went into wuz sixteen feet square, divided into foursquare rooms. It wuz two stories high, and little porches about twofeet wide wuz on each story, front and back. There wuz no chimney;there wuz a open place in the wall of the kitchen to let the smoke outfrom the little charcoal furnace they used to cook with, and onekettle wuz used to cook rice and fish; no spoons or forks are needed. The doors and frame-work wuz painted bronze color. There wuzn't muchfurniture besides the furnace and tea-kettle that stands handy to maketea at any time. A few cups and saucers, a small clock, a family idol, and a red cushioned platform they could move, high and wide enough fora seat so several can set back to back, is about all that isnecessary. Their floors are covered with a lined straw matting, soft as carpet;they sleep on cotton mats put away in the daytime; their head-rest isa small block of wood about one foot long, five inches wide and eightinches high. A pillow filled with cut rye straw and covered withseveral sheets of rice paper isn't so bad, though I should prefer mygood goose feather pillows. The Japanese are exceedingly neat andclean; they could teach needed lessons to the poorer classes inAmerica. We one day made an excursion twenty milds on the Tokiado, the greathighway of Japan. It is broad and smooth; five hundred miles long, andfollers the coast. Part of the way we went with horses, and littleside trips into the country wuz made with jinrikishas. Quaint littlevillages wuz on each side of the road, and many shrines on thewaysides. That day we see the famous temple of Diabutsu with itscolossal bronze idol. It wuz fifty feet high and eighty-seven feetround. The eyes three feet and a half wide. One thumb is three and ahalf feet round. He seemed to be settin' on his feet. A widder and a priest wuz kneelin' in front of this idol. The priestheld in one hand a rope and anon he would jerk out melancholy soundsfrom a big bronze bell over his head. In his other hand he held somelittle pieces of wood and paper with prayers printed on 'em. As hewould read 'em off he would lay one down on the floor, and the widderwould give him some money every time. I thought that wuz jest aboutwhere the prayers went, down on the floor; they never riz higher, Idon't believe. Josiah wuz kinder took with 'em, and sez he, "How handy that would be, Samantha, if a man wuz diffident, and every man, no matter how bashfulhe is, has more or less wood chips in his back yard. Sometimes I feeldiffident, Samantha. " But I sez, "I don't want any wooden prayers offered for me, JosiahAllen, and, " sez I, "that seen shows jest how widders are imposedupon. " "Well, " sez he, "she no need to dickered with the priest for 'em ifshe hadn't wanted to. " And I did wish that that little widder had known about the One everpresent, ever living God, who has promised to comfort the widder, be afather to the orphan, and wipe away all tears. But the Sunrise Land is waking up, there is a bright light in theEast: In the beauty of the lilies Christ is born acrost the sea, With a glory in his bosom that transfigures you and me. With the sweet gentleness and amiable nater of the Japans what willnot the divine religion of the Lord Jesus do for them? It will beplantin' seed in good ground that will spring up a hundredfold. I spoze that it wuz on Robert Strong's account (he is acquainted withso many big Chinamen and Japans) that we wuz invited to a eleganttiffen in one of the Mikado's palaces at Tokio. The grounds wuzbeautiful, the garden containing some of the most beautiful specimensof trees, trained into all shapes, some on 'em hundreds of years old, but havin' their faculties yet, and growin' jest as they wuz told to, and all the beautiful flowers and shrubs that Japan can boast of, andpalm trees, bananas, giant ferns and everything else beautiful in theway of vegetation. The palace is one of the oldest in Tokio. It wuz only one story high, but the rooms wuz beautiful. The fan chamber wuz fifty feet square, the walls covered with fans of every size and shape and color. Theonly furniture in this room wuz two magnificent cabinets of lacquerwork and four great, gorgeous bronze vases. The tiffen wuz gin by a high official; there wuz fifty guests. Thehour was two in the afternoon. There wuz ten ladies present--twobeautiful Japanese ladies, dressed in the rich toilette of Japan. Thelunch cards wuz little squares of scarlet paper, with black Japanesewriting. Josiah looked at the card intently and then whispered to me: "How be I goin' to know what I am eatin' from these duck tracks?" But I whispered, "Le's do what the rest do, Josiah, and we'll come outall right. " But we had a dretful scare, for right whilst we wuz partakin' of thechoice Japan viands a loud rumblin' sound wuz hearn, and I see even aswe rushed to the door the timbers of the ceilin' part and then cometogether agin and the great bronze chandelier swing back and forth. Mypardner ketched hold of my hand and hurried me along on a swift runand wouldn't stop runnin' for some time. I tried to stop him, for Igot out of breath, but he wuz bound to run right back to Yokohama, thirty miles off. But I convinced him that we would be no safer there, for you can't argy with earthquake shocks and tell when they'recomin', they are very common in all parts of Japan. After the firstheavy shock there wuz two lighter ones, and that ended it for thattime. But though we all went back to the table, I can't say that Itook any great comfort in the tiffen after that. A blow has fell onto me I wuzn't prepared for. We found a number ofletters waitin' for us here at the tarven that Robert Strong hadordered to be forwarded there. It seemed so good, whilst settin'under a palm tree, seein' jinrikishas go by, and Chinas and Japans, toset and read about the dear ones in Jonesville, and the old mair andSnip. The letters wuz full of affection and cheer, and after readin' 'em Igathered 'em up and sought my pardner to exchange letters with him, asI wuz wont to do, and I see he had quite a few, but what was mysurprise to see that man sarahuptishushly and with a guilty look tryto conceal one on 'em under his bandanna. And any woman will know thatall his other letters wuz as dross to me compared to the one he washidin'. I will pass over my argyments--and--and words, before thatletter lay in my hand. But suffice it to say, that when at last I readit and all wuz explained to me, groans and sithes riz from my burdenedheart deeper and despairener than any I had gin vent to in years andyears. And I may as well tell the hull story now, as I spoze my readers aremost as anxious about it as I wuz. Oh, Josiah! How could you done it?How I do hate to tell it! Must I tell the shameful facts? Oh, Duty!lower thy strongest apron strings and let me cling and tell and weep. And there it had been goin' on for months and I not mistrustin' it. But Duty, I will hold hard onto thy strings and tell the shamefultale. Josiah owned a old dwellin' house in the environs of Jonesville, rightacrost from Cap'n Bardeen's, who rented it of him to store things in. The town line runs right under the house, so the sink is in Zoar, andthe cupboard always had stood in Jonesville. But owin' to ErnestWhite's labors and prayers and votes, his and all other good ministersand earnest helpers, Jonesville went no-license now jest as Loontowndid last year. And jest as Satan always duz if he gits holt of souls that he can'tbuy or skair, he will try to cheat 'em, he is so suttle. It seems thatafter we got away that Cap'n Bardeen moved that cupboard over to theother side of the room into Zoar and went to sellin' whiskey outon't. Awful doin's! The minute I read the letter I sez: "Josiah Allen, do you write this very minute and stop this wicked, wicked works!" Sez I: "No knowin' how many Jonesvillians will feeltheir religion a-wobblin' and tottlin' just by your example; naterallythey would look up to a deacon and emulate his example--do you stop itto once!" "No, Samantha, " sez he, "Cap'n Bardeen and his father owns more cowsthan any other Jonesvillians. If I want to be salesman agin in theJonesville factory I mustn't make 'em mad, and they pay a dretful highrent. " "I wouldn't call it rent, " sez I, "I'd call it blood-money. I'd run apirate flag up on the ruff with these words on it, 'Josiah Allen, Deacon. '" He wuz agitated and sez, "Oh, no, Samantha; I wouldn't do that for theworld, I am so well thought on in the M. E. Meetin' house. " "Well, you won't be well thought on if you do such a thing as this!"sez I. "Jest think how Ernest White, that good devoted minister, haslabored and prayed for the good of souls and bodies, and you tryin'your best to overthrow it all. How could you do it, Josiah?" "Well, I may as well tell you, Samantha, I writ to Ury and kinder leftit to him. He knows my ambitions and my biziness. He knows how handymoney is, and he fixed it all straight and right. " "Ury!" sez I, "why should you leave it to Ury? Does he keep yourconscience and clean it off when it gits black and nasty by suchdoin's as this?" "No, Samantha, I've got my conscience all right. I brought it with meon my tower. " "Why should you leave it to Ury? He's your hired man, he would do asyou told him to, " sez I. "For a Methodist deacon such acts aredemeanin' and disgustin' for a pardner and Jonesville to witness, letalone the country. " And agin I sez, "You can stop it in a minute ifyou want to, and you know right from wrong, you know enough to sayyes or no without bringin' Ury into the scrape; Ury! spozein' you githim into it, I can tell you he won't bear the brunt of it before thebar of this country or that bar up above. You'll have to carry theresponsibility of all the evil it duz, and it will be a lastin'disgrace to you and the hull Methodist meetin-house if you let it goon. " Agin he sez, "Ury fixed it all right. " "How did Ury fix it?" sez I, in the cold axents of woman's skorn andcuriosity. "Well, Ury said, make Bardeen stop sellin' whiskey out of thecupboard, make him sell it out of the chist. There is a big chistthere that Bardeen bought to keep grain in, sez Ury; let Bardeen movethat cupboard acrost the room back into Jonesville, set the chist upon the sink in Zoar and sell it out of that. Ury said that in hisopinion that would make it all right, so that a perfessor and aMethodist deacon could do it with a clear conscience. " Sez I, "Do you write to once, Josiah Allen, and tell Bardeen to eitherstop such works, or move right out. " "Well, " sez he blandly, real bland and polite, "I will consider it, Samantha, I will give it my consideration. " "No, no, Josiah Allen, you know right from wrong, truth fromfalsehood, honesty from dishonesty, you don't want to consider. " "Yes, I do, Samantha; it is so genteel when a moral question comes upto wait and consider; it is very fashionable. " "How long do you lay out to wait, Josiah Allen?" sez I, coldly. "Oh, it is fashionable to not give a answer till you're obleeged to, but I will consult agin with Ury and probable along by Fall I can giveyou my ultimatum. " "And whilst you are a considerin' Bardeen will go on a sellin' pizento destroy all the good that Ernest White, that devoted minister ofChrist, and all the good men and wimmen helpers have done and are adoin'. " "Well, " sez Josiah, "I may as well tell you, you would probably hearon't, Ernest White writ me some time ago, and sent me a long petitionsigned by most all the ministers and leadin' men and wimmen, beggin'me to stop Bardeen. " "Well, what did you tell him, Josiah Allen?" "I told him, Samantha, I would consider it. " "And, " sez I, "have you been all this time, months and months, aconsiderin'?" "Yes, mom, " sez he, in a polite, genteel tone, "I have. " "Well, do you stop considerin' to once, Josiah Allen. " "No, Samantha, a pardner can do a good deal, but she can't break up aman's considerin'. It is very genteel and fashionable, and I shallkeep it up. " I groaned aloud; the more I thought on't, the worse I felt. Sez I, "Tothink of all the evils that are a flowin' out of that place, Josiah, and you could stop it to once if you wuz a minter. " "But, " sez Josiah, "Ury sez that if it wuzn't sold there by Cap'nBardeen the factory folks would go over into Zoar and git worse likkersold by low down critters. " Sez I, "You might as well say if Christians don't steal and murder, itwill be done by them of poor moral character. That is one strongweepon to kill the evil--confine the bizness to the low and vile andshow the world that you, a Methodist and a deacon, put the biznessright where it belongs, with murder and all wickedness, not as you aresayin' now by your example, it is right and I will protect it. " "Well, " sez Josiah, as sot as a old hen settin' on a brick bat, "it islaw; Ury has settled it. " My heart ached so that it seemed to clear my head. "We'll see, " sez I, "if it can't be changed. I'll know before a week has gone over myhead. " And I got up and dragged out the hair trunk, sithin' so deepthat it wuz dretful to hear, some like the melancholy winter windshowlin' round a Jonesville chimbly. "What are you a goin' to do, Samantha?" sez Josiah anxiously. "I am goin' back home, " sez I, "to-morrer to see about that law. " "Alone?" sez he. "Yes, alone, " sez I, "alone. " "Never!" sez Josiah. "Never will I let my idol go from Japan toJonesville unprotected. If you must go and make a town's talk fromChina to Jonesville I'll stand by you. " And he took down his hat andombrell. "What would you do if you went back?" sez I. "I should think you haddone enough as it is; I shall go alone. " "What! you go and leave all the pleasures of this trip and go alone?Part from your pardner for months and months?" "Yes, " sez I wildly, "and mebby forever. It don't seem to me that Ican ever live with a man that is doin' what you are. " And hot tearsdribbled down onto my sheep's-head night-caps. "Oh, Samantha!" sez he, takin' out his bandanna and weepin' inconsort, "what is money or ambition compared to the idol of my heart?I'll write to Ury to change the law agin. " "Dear Josiah!" sez I, "I knew, I knew you couldn't be so wicked as tocontinue what you had begun. But can you do it?" sez I. Sez he cheerfully, as he see me take out a sheep's-head night-cap andshet down the trunk led, "What man has done, man can do. If Ury canfix a law once, he can fix it twice. And he done it for me. " Sez he, "I can repeal it if I am a minter, and when I am a minter. " And he gotup and took a sheet of paper and begun to write to repeal that law. Igently leggo the apron-string dear Duty had lowered to me; it hadheld; pure Principle had conquered agin. Oh, the relief and sweetnessof that hour! Sweet is the pink blush of roses after the cold snows ofwinter; sweet is rest after a weary pilgrimage. Calm and beautiful is the warm ambient air of repose and affectionafter a matrimonial blizzard. Josiah wuz better to me than he had beenfor over seven weeks, and his lovin' demeanor didn't change for theworse for as many as five days. But the wicked wrong wuz done awaywith. I writ a letter to Ernest White tellin' him I never knowed a wordabout it till that very day, and my companion had repealed the law, and Cap'n Bardeen had got to move out or stop sellin' whiskey. Heknows how I worship Josiah; he didn't expect that I would come outopenly and blame him; no, the bare facts wuz enough. I ended up the letter with a post scriptum remark. Sez I: "WaitstillWebb is sweeter lookin' than ever and as good as pure gold, jest asshe always wuz, but the climate is wearin' on her, and I believe shewill be back in Jonesville as soon as we are, if not before. She is alovely girl and would make a Christian minister's home in Loontown orany other town a blessed and happy place. " I thought I wouldn't dast to do anything more than to give such alittle blind hint. But to resoom. Folks seem to have a wrong ideeabout the education of the Japanese. There are twenty-eight thousandschools in Japan, besides the private and public kindergartens. There are over three million native students out of a schoolpopulation of seven million. There are sixty-nine thousand teachers, all Japanese, excepting about two hundred and fifty American, Germanand English. Nearly ten million dollars (Japanese) is raised annuallyfor educational purposes from school fees, taxes, interest on funds, etc. They have compulsory school laws just like ours. And not adrunken native did we see whilst in Japan, and I wish that I couldsay the same of New York for the same length of time or Chicago orJonesville. And for gentle, polite, amiable manners they go as fur ahead ofAmericans as the leaves of their trees duz, and I've seen leaves theremore'n ten feet long. The empire of Japan consists of three thousandeight hundred islands, from one eight hundred milds long to them nobigger than a tin pan, and the population is about forty-threemillion. I don't spoze any nation on earth ever made faster progressthan Japan has in the last thirty years: railways, telegraph postalsystem. It seems as if all Japan wanted wuz to find out the best wayof doin' things, and then she goes right ahead and duz 'em. Robert Strong wuz talking about what the word Japan meant, the SunriseLand. And he said some real pretty things about it and so did Dorothy. They wuz dretful took with the country. Robert Strong has travelledeverywhere and he told me that some portions of Japan wuz morebeautiful than any country he had ever seen. We took several shortjourneys into the interior to see the home life of the people, butRobert Strong, who seemed to be by the consent of all of us the headof our expedition, thought that we had better not linger very longthere as there wuz so many other countries that we wanted to visit, but 'tennyrate we decided to start for Calcutta from Hongkong, stopping on the way at Shanghai. CHAPTER XIX We wuz a goin' to stop for a day or two at Shanghai and I wuz realglad on't, for I felt that I must see the Empress, Si Ann, without anymore delay, and I hearn she wuz there visitin' some of her folks. Yes, I felt the widder Hien Fong ort to hear what I had to say to herwith no further delay, I felt it wuz a duty that I owed toward thenation and Josiah. The voyage from Yokohama to Shanghai is very interesting, a part of itis through the inland sea, mountains and valleys on both sides, manyislands and large and small towns all along the shores. Our hull partykep' well and all enjoyed all the strange picturesque scenery, most asnew to us as if we wuz on another planet. Yes, I d'no as Jupiter wouldlook any stranger to us than the country did, or Mars or Saturn. We wuz over a day crossin' the Yaller Sea, well named, for its wateris as yaller as the sands on its shores. I'd hate to wash whiteclothes in it. And as we drew near Shanghai it wuz all alive withChinese junks full of men, wimmen and children. The children here onthese boats seem to be tied up with ropes, givin' 'em room to crawlround, same as I have tied up Jonesville hens that wanted to set. Shanghai means, "approaching the sea, " and I spoze it might just aswell mean approaching from the sea, as we did. Old Shanghai issurrounded by a wall and moat and is entered by six gates, the roadsare only ten feet wide and dirty and bad smellin', and most of itshouses are small, though there are a few very fine buildings, according to their style, lots of little piazzas jutting outeverywhere with the ends turned up, that seems to be their taste; whya ruff or a piazza straight acrost would have been a boon to myJonesville trained eyes. The houses on the principal streets are usedfor shops; no winders on the first floor; they are all open in frontduring the day and closed by heavy latticework at night. The favorite carriage here is a wheelbarrow, the wheel in the centreand a seat on each side. Josiah and I got into one, he carryin' Tommyin his lap, but he sez with a groan: "I never spozed that I should git down to this, Samantha, to ride in awheelbarrow. What would Ury say! I am glad he can't see it, or DeaconHenzy or any of the other Jonesville brothers and sistern. " The furrin suburbs are laid out like a European city, with broadstreets, well lighted and clean. We went on the Bubbling Well Road, named from a boiling spring a few miles out. The road is broad andsmooth as glass with beautiful villas along the way; we also passed agreat number of small burying places. They have to bury folksaccording to the rules of Feng Shui. If Feng Shui should order aburial place in a dooryard it would have to be there. It rulesbuildings, customs, laws, everything. I asked a Chinaman who couldtalk English what this Feng Shui wuz that they had to obey it sostrictly, and he described it as being like the wind and water: likewind because you don't know where it come from nor when it would go orwhere; and like water because you could never know how to grasp it, itwould elude you and slip away and you would have nothing in your handto show. Miss Meechim cried out about the enormity of such a law andlaid it to the evil doin's of furriners, but Arvilly said that it wuzsome like the laws we had in America, for we found out on inquiry thatmoney would most always appease this great Feng Shui and git it toconsent to most anything if it wuz paid enough, just as it did inAmerica. Josiah said he had a good mind to set up some such thing inJonesville when he got back, sez he, "I wouldn't name it Feng Shuijust like this, I might call it Fine Shue or sunthin' like that. Andjest see, Samantha, how handy it would be if the meetin' house wentaginst me I would jest git up and lift up my hand and say, 'Fine Shuehas decided. It will be as I say. ' Or on 'lection day, if I wuzn't putup for office, or when they elect somebody besides me, or at thecheese factory if they put up another salesman, or on the beat, ifthey wanted another pathmaster, I'd jest call on the Fine Shue andthere I'd be. Why, Samantha, " sez he, gittin' carried away in hisexcitement, "I could git to be President jest as easy as fallin' off alog if I could make the Fine Shue work. " "Yes, " sez I, "but that is a big if; but do you want to, Josiah, turnback the wheels of our civilization that are creaky and jolty enough, heaven knows, back into worse and more swampy paths than they arerunnin' in now?" "I d'no, " sez Josiah, "but it would be all right if it wuz run by aman like me; a Methodist in full standin', and one of the mostenlightened and Christian men of the times. " But I lifted my hand in a warnin' way and sez, "Stop, Josiah Allen, toonce! such talk is imperialism, and you know I am sot like a rockaginst that. Imperialism is as much out of place in a republic as aangel in a glue factory. " Well, I am in hopes that ten thousand milds of travel will jolt someidees out of his mind. Being in Shanghai over Sunday, we attended service held by amissionary. It wuz a beautiful service which we all enjoyed. The wordsof this good Christian man in prayer and praise sounded to our ears assweet as the sound of waters in a desert land. Over a hundred wuzpresent, and after service the pulpit wuz moved off and several wuzbaptized in water jest as they do in America. The rich and poor seem to live side by side more than they do in ourcountry, and rich merchants live over their shops; mebby it is toprotect them from the Feng Shui, for if that gits on track of a richman a great part of his wealth is appropriated by the government; itvery often borrys their money--or what it calls borryin'. Shanghai wuz the first place where I see men carryin' fans. Whenthey're not fannin' themselves they put the fan at the back of theirneck, for a ornament I guess. Josiah made a note in his pocket diary: "Mem--To git a fan the dayafter I git home, to carry it to Jonesville to meetin', to fan myselfwith it on the way there before Elder Minkley and Brother Henzy. Mem--A red and yaller one. " But of this fan bizness more anon. There are not many wimmen in the streets here. The poorer class ofChinese let their feet grow to the natural size; it is only thearistocracy who bind up their feet. But my mission to the Empress wore on me. I felt that I must not delayseekin' a augience. And, as it happened, or no, not happened--it wuzto be--one day whilst Josiah and Arvilly and Tommy and I wuz walkin'in a beautiful garden, the rest of the party bein' away on anothertower after pleasure and instruction, Josiah and Tommy had gone to seethe fish in a fountain a little ways off, and Arvilly wuz somedistance away, when all of a sudden I heard a bystander say in a low, awe-struck voice, "There is the Empress. " She wuz walkin' through the garden with two ladies-in-waiting, and aelegant carriage wuz goin' slow a little ways off, givin' her a chancefor excercise, I spoze. She wuz dressed in a long, colored silknight-gown--or it wuz shaped like one--though they wear 'em day times, all embroidered and glitterin' with precious stuns. She didn't haveher crown on--mebby it wuz broke and away to be fixed--but her hairwuz combed dretful slick and stuck full of jewelled pins and stars, etc. I knowed her by her picture, and also by my feelin's, and I sezto myself, Now is the time for me to onburden myself of the importantmission that had been layin' so heavy on my chist. Yes, Duty's apronstrings jest drawed me right up in front of her, and I advanced, holdin' out my hand in as friendly a way as if she had come for aall-day's visit to me in Jonesville. Her ladies-in-waitin' kinder fellback, and as I advanced I bowed real low--as low as I dasted to, for Ifelt that I wouldn't have ketched my feet in the facin' of my dressand fell down at that time for a dollar bill. She's smart; sherecognized my lofty sperit, and her greetin' wuz considerable cordial, though held back by her Chinese education. Sez I, "Empress Si Ann (I d'no but I ort to call her Sarah Ann, that'sprobable her name docked off by her folks to pet her. But I thought Iwouldn't meddle with a pet name; I'd call her Si Ann). " Sez I, "I set out from Jonesville with a important message for you, and I've bore it over the ocean on a tower and now I lay it at yourfeet. " I here paused to give her a chance to wonder what it wuz, and get someexcited, then I went on, "I felt that I must see you on my own accountand Josiah's and the nation's, and tell you not to, oh, not to laythat Piece Conference to us. I have laid awake nights worryin' aboutit, for fear you'd think that Josiah and I, bein' prominent Americans, had jined in and wuz tryin' to cut China to pieces. But we hadn't athing to do with it. " I meant to keep Josiah in the background, knowin' the Chinese aversionto mix up the sects in company, but he'd come back and he had to putin his oar here and sez he, "No, they couldn't git me to jine 'em. Iwuz down with a crick at the time and Samantha had to nuss me. We hadour hands full and we couldn't have jined 'em anyway, " he sez. I wunk at him and stepped on his toe, but nothin' could stop him, andhe went on, "I wouldn't have jined 'em anyway, Miss Hein Fong, Iwouldn't treat a neighbor so. " "Neighbor?" sez she wonderin'ly. "Yes, " sez he, "you know our land jines on the under side. Chinajines my paster in the middle, though owin' to the way our land layswe can't neighbor much, and, " sez he, "you're enough sight betterneighbors than some I've got, your folks are old settlers and havealways tended to their own bizness and kep' their cattle and hens tohum, which is more than I can say for all the neighbors whose landjines mine. " But I could see that the ladies-in-waitin' wuz oneasy at havin' a mantalkin' to 'em so free and I kinder advanced in front of him and sez: "Josiah and I wuz dretful tickled with the idee at first when wespozed that conference meant real p-e-a-c-e and tryin' to bring themost beautiful gift of God and joy of heaven nigher to earth. Why, itjest riz us right up, we felt so highly tickled with it. But when wesee 'em begin to spell it p-i-e-c-e, and quarrel over the pieces, why, then we turned right agin 'em. Why, good land! even if it wuz right, Josiah has got all the land he wants to work and more too, and as Itell him, what is the use of him or the nation havin' a great lot ofland to stand idle and pay taxes on, and keep a gang of hired men towatch. Men and nations can git land poor, I believe. " I see she liked what I said about the Peace Commission, but I wuzafraid she didn't git my idee jest right, so I sez, "I believe in thefirst on't the Zar's idee come right down from heaven, filtered intohis comprehension mebby through a woman's apprehension. But you knowhow it is, Si Ann, in the berry lot now if there are bushes hangin'full of big ones jest over the fence and somebody else is gittin' 'emall, you kinder want to jine in and git some on 'em yourself, thoughyou may be a perfesser and singin' a Sam tune at the time, speciallyif the fence is broke down that separates you. I can see how it wuzwith that Piece Commission and make allowances for 'em, but we didn'thave a thing to do with it and we don't want any of the pieces. " Myaxent carried conviction with it; I see she looked relieved. Shedidn't say it right out, but I felt that we hadn't fell in herestimation, and I went on: "And I don't want you to blame Uncle Sam either, Si Ann. I believe hewill help you all he can, help you in the right way, too; help you tohelp yourselves. But your folks have got to brace up and do theirpart; Uncle Sam will neighbor with you if you give him a chance. He'sreal good-hearted, though bein' so easy and good-natered, he isdeceived lots of times and influenced and led around by them that wantto make money out of him, such as the trusts and the liquor power. Buthe stands ready to neighbor with you, and don't turn your back on him, Si Ann. Don't do anything to get him huffy, for though he hain't quickto git mad, he's got a temper when it's rousted up. " She said sunthin' about Uncle Sam turnin' her folks out and notlettin' 'em step their feet on our sile. I couldn't deny it, and itkinder danted me for a minute how I wuz goin' to smooth that over, butconcluded that as in every other emergency in life, the plain truthwuz the best, and I sez in a real amiable voice: "Si Ann, there is two sides to that jest as there is to every nationaland neighborhood quarrel. Uncle Sam hain't liked the way your folkshave acted with him, and though I dare presoom to say he's some toblame, yet I can see where your folks have missed it. They would flockright over to our place, crowdin' our own folks out of house and home, and expect Uncle Sam to protect 'em, and then they would jest rake andscrape all they could offen us and go home to spend their money;wouldn't even leave one of their bones in our ground. They didn't wantto become citizens of the United States, they seemed to kinder want toset down and stand up at the same time, which hain't reasonable if itis done by an American or a Chinee. " She said sunthin' about the masses of other foreigners that Uncle Samallowed to crowd into our country. "Well, " sez I, "they're willin' to become citizens, the German andEnglish and Irish and Russian and Italian babies grow up Americans. But it wuzn't so with your folks, Si Ann. From the children's littlepig-tails down to their little wooden shues they wuz clear China, soaked in, dyed in the wool, born so, and as long as their bones hungtogether and afterwards, clear China. They kep' themselves jest as furfrom American institutions and beliefs as ile stays away from waterand wouldn't mix any more. Their bodies stayed on our shores whilstthey could make money out of us. But their souls and minds wuz jest asfur removed from our institutions and constitutions as if they wuzsettin' in Jupiter with their legs hangin' off. It wuz galdin' toUncle Sam and finally he had to stop it. But he didn't do it out ofmeanness. He jest had to, for of course you know your own folks comefirst. " And thinkin' mebby I'd been too hash describin' her folks I went on, "I spoze mebby that high stun wall of yourn has kinder stiffened andhardened the nature of your folks and made it harder for 'em tochange. But you're on the right track now, Si Ann, you have begun tobreak down that big wall, you've begun to be more neighborly. Anddon't you ever crouch down and hide behind that great stun wall agin;you jest keep right on bein' neighborly and Uncle Sam will help you. " Si Ann looked real good and as if she took every word I said in goodpart; bein' naterally so smart she would recognize the onselfishnessand nobility of my mission, but I see that there wuz a real pert lookon one of the ladies' faces as she said sunthin' to one of the otherones, and I mistrusted that they didn't like what I had said aboutthat wall of theirn, and I went on to say to Si Ann: "Of course you may say that a nation or a woman has a right to do asthey've a mind to, but common sense must be used if you are goin' toenjoy yourself much in this world. Now, we had a neighbor inJonesville that sot out in married life determined not to borrow orlend, dretful exclusive, jest built a high wall of separation roundherself and family. But after tryin' it for a year or so she wuz gladto give it up, and many is the cup of tea and sugar I've lent hersince, and she borries and lends her washtub now or biler, or settin'hens, or anythin'. And she sez that she and her family takes as muchagin' comfort now and are doin' as well agin', for of course theneighbors didn't set so much store by 'em as they did when their portswuz open, as you may say, and they wuz more neighborly. " I could see by Si Ann's face that she not only enjoyed all I said, butbelieved a good share on't, and bein' such a case for justice, I feltthat I ort to let her know I realized our own nation's short-comin's, as well as hern. Sez I, "I hain't got a word to say to you, Si Ann, about the different castes in your country, when the wimmen in my ownland build up a wall between themselves and their kitchen helpershigher than the highest peak of your stun wall and harder to git over, and I don't want to say a word about your folks bindin' down theirchildren's feet to make 'em small as long as our own females pinchdown their waists till they're in perfect agony and ten times as badas to pinch their feet, for the life, the vital organs don't lay inthe feet, or hain't spozed to, and so it don't hurt 'em half so muchto be tortured. And as long as they drag round yards of silk andvelvet through the streets to rake up filth and disease to carry homeand endanger their own lives and their families; no, as long as ourfemales do all this I hain't nothin' to say about your dress andcustoms here, nor I hain't a goin' to cast reflections agin you aboutyour men wearin' night gowns and braidin' their hair down their backs. Good land, Si Ann! you and I know what men be. We are married wimmenand seen trouble. You couldn't stop 'em if you tried to. If JosiahAllen took it into his head to braid his hair down his back, I shouldhave to let it go on unless I broke it up sarahuptishly by cuttin' itoff when he wuz asleep, but thank fortin' he hain't got enough so thatthe braid would be bigger than a pipe stale anyway if he should let itgrow out, and he is so dressy he wouldn't like that. But I've tried tobreak up his wearin' such gay neckties for years and years, and if heshould go out and buy one to-day it would most likely be red andyaller. " [Illustration: I withdrawed him, bowin' very low and smilin' ather. --Page 219. ] I felt that China hadn't been used exactly right; I knowed it. Youngernations--new-comers, as you may say--had made light on her and abusedher, usin' the very type the Chinese had invented to say they didn'tknow anything and usin' the gunpowder they had invented to blow 'em upwith. I had felt that the Powers hadn't treated 'em well, and I hadmade up my mind some time ago that when I see the Powers I should tell'em what I thought on't. Then there wuz the opium trade--a burnin'shame! I wanted to sympathize with her about that, but thought mebbyit wuz best to not harrer up her feelin's any more, so I sez in a realpolite way: "I have nothin' further to say now, Si Ann, only to bid you adoo andto tell you that if you ever come to Jonesville be sure and come andsee me; I'll be proud and happy to have you. " Here Josiah had to put in his note: "Good-by, Widder!" sez he. If Ihad had time I would have tutored him; he spoke just as he would towidder Gowdey. I wanted him to act more courtly and formal, but it wuztoo late, it wuz spoke. "Good-by, Widder; we'll have to be a-goin'. We've had quite a spell of weather, but it looks some like rain now, and I have a important engagement to-night, and we'll have to begittin' hum. " But I gently withdrawed him, bowin' very low myself and lookin'dretful smilin' at her. Like all great monarchs, she wanted to make her visitors a present, and she proposed to send us several drawin's of tea of the kind sheused, and a little hunk of opium, though, as I told her, I shouldnever use it in the world only to smoke in a pipe for the toothache;and she also proposed to send us a china sugar-bowl and a piece ofthe Chinee wall, which last I told her I should value high as a signthat the old things wuz passin' away and better days comin'. And then I made some more real low bows and Josiah did, bein' wunk atby me, and we withdrawed ourselves from the Presence. But Josiah, always overdoin' things, takin' out his bandanna and a-wavin' ittowards her as he bowed most to the ground. But what wuz my surpriseas we walked away kinder backward, Josiah mutterin' to me that heshould fall flat if he backed off much furder! What wuz my horrow tosee Arvilly advance with a copy of her books and present 'em to theEmpress. One of the ladies-in-waiting, who seemed to talk Englishquite considerable, looked at the books and read their titles to herMajesty, who immediately signified her desire to purchase 'em, andbefore she left the group Arvilly had sold three copies of the "TwinCrimes" and two of the "Wild and Warlike. " Poor Empress! Poor Si Ann! Well might she treasure the last-namedbook, "The Wild, Wicked and Warlike Deeds of Men. " Poor thing! I amafraid she will see plenty of it herself. Them Powers, sometimes, whenthey git to goin', act like the Old Harry. CHAPTER XX The engagement my pardner had spoke on wuz to meet a Chinaman that wuzcomin' to see Robert Strong that evenin'. Robert had met him inCalifornia, and Josiah seemed dretful anxious to git home so as todress up for his reception. And I sez, "There is time enough; Ishouldn't think it would take you more than two hours to wash yourhands and change your neck-tie. " "Well, " sez he, in a evasive way, "I--I don't want to be scrimped fortime. " So, as Tommy and I wanted to stop along on the way, he left us andwent home. Robert had told us a good deal about this man, Mr. Hi-wal-hum; about his wealth and high official standing, and Josiahhad been talkin' more or less about him all day; he looked forrered toit. He had said to me: "Samantha, this man is a Potentate, and itstands us in hand to be polite always to Potentates. " Well, I couldn't dispute him nor didn't want to. When we arriv home Ithought I would have jest about time to go to my room and wash my faceand hands and put on a clean collar and cuffs and change Tommy'sclothes. Tommy went on a little ahead of me, and I see him bend downand stretch his little neck forrered and look through the door as ifhe wuz agast at some sight. And as I come up he put his little fingerson his lips, as I spoze he'd seen me do, and whispered: "Keep still, Grandma; I don't know what Grandpa is doin'. " I looked over his shoulder and thought to myself I should think asmuch, I should think he wouldn't know. There stood Josiah Allen beforethe glass and of all the sights I ever see his dress went ahead. Hehad got on a red woolen underskirt and his dressin' gown over itkinder floated back from it, and he had took out of my trunk a switchof hair that Tirzah Ann had put in, thinkin' mebby I would want todress my head different in foreign countries; I hadn't wore it at all, and it wuz clear in the bottom of my trunk, but he had got at itsomehow and had fastened it onto his head, and it hung down his backand ended with a big broad, red ribbin bow; it was one of Tommy'sneck-ties. And he'd got all my jewelry--every mite on't--and hadfastened it onto him on different places, and all of Tommy's ribbinsto tie his collar with, wuz made into bows and pinned onto him, and myC. E. Badge and W. C. T. U. Bow of white ribbin, and he had got my bigpalm leaf fan and had tied a big, red bow on't, and he wuz standin'before the glass fannin' himself and cranin' his neck one way andtother to see how he looked and admire himself, I spoze. And anon hetried to put the fan over his right ear. The idee! a palm leaf fanthat wouldn't shet. And he spoke out to himself: "No, I can't do that, but I can be fannin' myself, all the timefannin' and bowin'. " And then he stepped forrerd towards the glass andmade a bow so low that his switch flopped over and ketched on therocker of a chair and he couldn't move either way without jerkin' hisbraid off. "Goodness gracious!" I hearn him say, "I never yet tried to be genteelwithout its being broke up some way, " and he gin a jerk and left hisswitch on the floor. He took it up tenderly and smoothed it out andwuz tryin' to attach it to his head agin. It wuz fastened on by a redribbin comin' up over his head and tied on top. But at that minute heketched sight of me and he looked some meachin', but he begunimmegiately pourin' our profuse reasons for his costoom and manners. Sez he, "You know, Robert wants us to meet that high official, and Ifelt that it would help our relations with China if I should dress upChina fashion. " Sez I, "It will help one of your relations if you'll take off thatred petticoat of hern, and ribbins and cameos and badges and things. " Sez he, "I am doin' this for political reasons, Samantha, and can't behampered by domestic reasons and ignorance. " And he kep' on tyin' thebow on his foretop. Sez I, "For the sake of your children and grandchildren won't youdesist and not put 'em to shame and make a laughin' stock of yourselfbefore Miss Meechim and Arvilly and all the rest?" "I shall do my duty, Samantha, " sez he, and he pulled out the ribbinof the bow, so that it sot out some like a turban over his forward. "Of course I look very dressy and pretty in this costoom, but that isnot my reason for wearin' it; you and Arvilly are always talking aboutpolitical men who don't come up to the mark and do their duty by theirconstituents. I am a very influential man, Samantha, and there is notellin' how much good I shall do my country this day, and the sneersof the multitude shall not deter me. " Sez I, almost fearfully, "Think of the meetin' house, Josiah, whereyou're a deacon and looked up to; what will they say to hear of this, passin' yourself off for a Chinaman; dressin' up in petticoats and redribbins!" Sez he, cranin' his neck round to see the bow hangin' down his back, "Our old forefathers went through worse trials than this when they eattheir cartridge boxes and friz themselves at Valley Forge, " and hefingered some of them bows and ornaments on his breast agin with avain, conceited smirk of satisfaction. I wuz at my wits' end; Iglanced at the door; there wuz no lock on it; what should I do?Religion and common sense wouldn't move him, and as for my sharpestweepon--good vittles--here I wuz hampered, I couldn't cook 'em forhim, what could I do? Sez he agin, "I only do this for patriotism; I sacrifice myself on thealtar of my country, " and he fanned himself gracefully, lookin'sarahuptishly into the glass. "Well, " sez I, growin' calm as I thought of a forlorn hope, "mebby itis best, Josiah, and I hain't a-goin' to be outdone by you inpatriotism. I too will sacrifice myself. " And I proceeded to comb myhair with a firm look on my face. He looked alarmed. "What do you mean, Samantha?" sez he. "I won't let you go ahead of me in sacrificing yourself, Josiah. No, Iwill go fur ahead of what you or anybody else would do; it will mostprobable kill me, but I shall not falter. " "What is it, Samantha?" sez he, droppin' the fan and approachin' mewith agitated mean. "What are you goin' to do? If it is to throwyourself in front of any idol and perish, I will save you if I shedthe last drop of blood in my system!" "Yes, " sez I, "you could do great bizness in savin' me, togged out asyou are, made helpless by your own folly; but, " sez I, in a holler, awful axent, "it hain't that, Josiah; it is fur worse than losin' mylife; that wouldn't be nothin' in comparison. " He looked white as a piller case. Sez he: "Tell me to once what youlay out to do. " "Well, " sez I, "if you must know, I spoze that it might help ourrelations with China if I should part with you and wed a Chinapotentate. It would kill me and be bad for the potentate, but if yourcountry's welfare is at stake, if it would help our relations I----" "Let the relations go to Jericho, Samantha! every one on 'em, and thePotentates! every one on 'em!" and he kicked off them robes quickerthan I can tell the tale. Sez I, "Josiah, you needn't tear every rag you've got on; take 'em offquietly. " He'd put 'em on over his own clothes. He obeyed meimplicitly, and sez he anxiously, as he laid 'em all on the bed: "You've gin up the idee, hain't you, Samantha?" Sez I, "I have for the present, Josiah, I wuz only doin' it toemulate your sacrifice; if you don't sacrifice yourself any further, Ishan't. " He hadn't been so good to me for sometime as he wuz for the rest ofthat day. I only done it to stop his display, and my conscience hain'tbeen quite at rest ever sence about it, but then a woman has to workheadwork to keep her pardner within bounds. I wuzn't goin' to have himmake a fool of himself before Arvilly and Miss Meechim. Arvilly wouldnever let him hearn the end on't nor me nuther. Well, we met the potentate in our own clothes and he met us in his ownclothes, jest as he and we had a right to. He wuz a real sensible man, so Robert Strong said, and he understood a good deal of his talk andort to know. Well, from Shanghai we sailed for Hongkong and then embarked for Pointde Galle on the island of Ceylon, expectin' to stop on the way atSaigon in Cochin-China and Singapore. It wuz dretful windy and onpleasant at first. It is much pleasanter toread about a monsoon in Jonesville with your feet on a base burnerthan to experience one on a steamer. Everything swayed and tipped andswung, that could, even to our stomachs. We only made a short stop atSaigon--a hotter place I wuz never in. I thought of the oven in ourkitchen range and felt that if Philury wuz bakin' bread and meat andbeans and got into the oven to turn 'em, she knew a little about theclimate we wuz enjoying. As we ascended the river our ship got a little too near the shore andkinder run its prow into a jungle where the monkeys hung from thetree-tops and made fun of us, I spoze, mad at our invadin' theirdomain and wanted us to pay, 'tennyrate the muskeeters sent in theirbills, sharp ones. Saigon is a pretty place set in its tropicalscenery; it has eighty or ninety thousand inhabitants and belongs toFrance. The natives are small and slower than time in the primer. Singapore is an island in the straits of Malacca and is twenty-fourmilds long and fourteen wide; it is a British province ruled bynative princes under the Queen. Here the days and nights are of equallength and it rains about every day; it has a mixed population, Chinamen, Malays, Europeans and a few Americans, mebby a hundredthousand in all. We didn't stay long here, but rode out in what they called a Jherrylookin' like a dry goods box drawed by a couple of ponies. Josiah sez to me, "I am glad that the Malay coolers wear a little morethan the Japans. " And the coolies here did wear besides their red loincloth a narrer strip of white cotton cloth hangin' over their leftshoulders. Our hotel wuz a very comfortable one; it consisted ofseveral buildin's two stories high connected by covered halls; it wuzsurrounded by handsome trees and beautiful ornamental shrubbery andflowers. The wide verandas wuz very pleasant, with their bamboo chairs andcouches and little tables where you could have tea served. Birds ofthe most beautiful plumage soared and sung in the trees, andbutterflies that looked like flowers on wings fluttered about. Youcan't tell men from wimmen by their clothes. They all wear earringsand bracelets and nose-rings. Josiah sez to me: "I have always said, Samantha, that men didn't dress gay enough; a fewbracelets and breastpins and earrings would add to a man's looksdretfully, and I mean to set the fashion in Jonesville. It would taketen years offen my age. Jest see how proud the men walk; they feelthat they're dressed up; it gives 'em a lofty look. " The men did seem to have a different gait from the females; the wimmenlooked more meek and meachin. We didn't stay long in Saigon, but wevisited the Whampoo garders and found that they were perfectlybeautiful, made by Mr. Whampoo, a rich Chinaman. There wuz fifty acresunder most perfect cultivation. Here the Chinese fad of dwarfing andtraining trees wuz carried to perfection; there wuz trees trainedinto all sorts of shapes. One wuz a covered carriage about three feethigh, with a horse, all tree, but natural as life; and then there wuzpagodas and men and wimmen and animals and birds all growin' andhavin' to be trimmed by the patient Chinese gardener. The tree theycan use best is a evergreen with a little leaf and a white flower notmuch bigger than the head of a pin. But there wuz not only everytropical tree you could think on, palm, cocoanut, nutmeg, cinnamon, tea, coffee, and clove bush, but trees and plants from every part ofthe world, some from America. Here wuz a Victoria lily in its full beauty, the dark green leavesedged with brown and red, as big round as our washtub, and turned upon the edges about two inches. Each plant has one leaf and one flower. And we see the most lovely orchids here; Dorothy thought them the mostbeautiful of all. Well, in a day or two we sot out for Ceylon's isle. As we drew nigh to Ceylon I sez to Josiah: "Did you ever expect, Josiah Allen, to feel "'The balmy breezes That blow from Ceylon's Isle Where every prospect pleases, And only man is vile?'" And he sez, holdin' on his hat, "I shouldn't call these breezes verybammy, and you no need to lay such a powerful stress on _man_, Samantha, that term, man, means wimmen too in this case. " "Yes, " sez Arvilly, who wuz standin' nigh, "that term, man, alwaysincludes wimmen when there is any blame or penalty attached, but whenit sez 'Man is born free and equal, ' it means men alone. " "Yes, " sez Josiah, smilin' real pleasant, "you've happened to hit itjest right, Arvilly. " "Well, " sez I, "do look and enjoy the beauty that is spread out rightbefore you. " Our good ship made its way into the harbor of Colombo, through a multitude of boats with men of every color and size at theiroars and all gesticulating and jabbering in axents as strange to us asJupiter talk would be. Some of the boats wuz queer lookin'; they arecalled dugouts, and have outriggers for the crew to set on. They carryfruit and provision to the steamers in the bay, and take passengers toand fro. Bein' took by one to terry firmy, we soon made our way through thechatterin' strange lookin' crowd of every color and costoom to atarven where we obtained food and needed rest, and the next mornin' wesallied out some as we would if we had jest landed on the shores ofanother planet to explore a new world. We walked through the streets by big gardens that seemed jest ablazewith color and swoonin' with perfume. The low white houses wuz bankedup with drifts of blossom and verdure as the Jonesville houses wuzwith snow drifts on a winter day. Sweet voiced birds in gayest plumageswung and soared aloft instead of the ice-suckles that hung from theeaves of Jonesville houses. And instead of Ury clad in a buffalo coatand striped wool mittens walking with icy whiskers and frost-bittenears to break the ice in the creek, wuz the gay crowd of men, wimmenand children dressed in all the rich colors of the rainbow, if theywuz dressed at all. Solid purple, yellow, green, burnin' colorspalpitating with light and cheer under the warm breezes and glowin'sunshine. Sometimes the children wuz in jest the state that Adam and Eve wuzwhen they wuz finished off and pronounced good. Sometimes a string anda red rag comprised their toilette, but they all seemed a part of thestrange picture, the queer, mysterious, onknown Orient. The gorgeouscolorin' of the men's apparel struck Josiah to the heart agin; hevowed that he would show Jonesville the way for men to dress if heever got home agin. Sez he, "I will show Deacon Henzy and Uncle SimeBentley that a man can wear sunthin' besides that everlastin' black orgray. " Sez he: "I can dress gay with small expense; I can take one of your whitewoolen sheets and color it with diamond dye a bright red or a green oryeller at a outlay of ten cents per sheet, and one of my bandannaswill make a crackin' good turban. Let me walk into the Jonesvillemeetin' house with that gorgeous drapery wropped round me, why Ishould be the lion of the day. " "Yes, " sez I, "you would break up the congregation as quick as a reallion would. " "Well, I'll tell you, Samantha, there is beauty in such a costoom thatour sombry coats and pantaloons and vests can't come nigh to. " I spoze Ceylon is the most beautiful place in the world, such glow andrichness of color, such aboundin' life in the verdure, in the animaland vegetable kingdom. No wonder so many think it wuz the originalGarden of Eden; no shovelin' snow for Adam or bankin' up fruits andvegetables for winter's use. No, he could step out barefoot in thewarm velvety grass in December, and pick oranges and gather sweetpotatoes and cucumbers, and strawberries if Eve took it into her headshe wanted a shortcake pie. And little Cain could cut up caneliterally, and every way, in January, and Abel pile flowers and fruiton his altar all the year round. But I wonder which of theirdescendants built these immense magnificent cities layin' fur belowforests and billows of turf and flowers. I wonder how they looked and what language they spoke and what theirpolitics wuz. Arvilly thought they must have been temperance folks. Sez she, "Any city that has reservoirs twenty milds long believed indrinkin' water. " We had took a tower to see one of them dug up cities, and sure enough the water reservoir wuz twenty milds long; jest thinkfrom that what the size of the hull city must have been, when theirwaterin' trough, as you may say, wuz as long as America's biggestcity. Stately stairways, up which twenty carriages big as our democratcould pass side by side if horses could climb stairs. A row of tall pillers, ten milds in length, line the roads to some ofthem cities, and I sez: "Oh, good land! How I wish I could be a mouse in the wall and see whoand what passed over them roads, and why, and when, and where. " And Josiah sez, "Why don't you say you wish you wuz a elephant andcould look on? your simely would seem sounder. " And I sez, "Mebby so, for hull rows of carved marble elephants standalong them broad roads; I guess they worshipped 'em. " And he sez, "I wuz alludin' to size. " Robert Strong looked ruther sad as we looked on them ruins buried sodeep by the shovel of time. But I sez to him in a low voice: "There is no danger of the city you're a-rarin' up ever bein' engulfedand lost, for justice and mercy and love shine jest as bright to-dayas when the earth was called out of chaos. Love is eternal, immortal, and though worlds reel and skies fall, what is immortal cannotperish. " He looked real grateful at me; he sets store by me. Everywhere, as you walk through the streets, you are importuned to buysunthin'; some of the finest jewels in the world are bought here. Themerchants are dretful polite, bowin' and smilin', their hair combedback slick and fastened up with shell combs. They wear white, shortpantaloons and long frocks of colored silk, open in front over a redwaistcoat; sometimes they are bare-footed with rings on their toes;they wear rings in their nose and sometimes two on each ear, at thetop and bottom. Josiah studied their costoom with happy interest, but a deep shade ofanxiety darkened his mean as they would spread out their wares beforeme, and he sez with a axent of tender interest: "If you knew, Samantha, how much more beautiful you looked to me inyour cameo pin you would never think of appearin' in diamonds andrubies. " I sez, "I guess I won't buy any nose-rings, Josiah, my nose is prettybig anyway. " "Yes, " he interrupted me eagerly, "they wouldn't be becomin', Samantha, and be in the way eatin' sweet corn on the ear and such. " There are lots of men carryin' round serpents, and I sez to Josiah, "Who under the sun would want to buy a snake unless they wuz crazy?" "Yes, " said Josiah, "Eve made a big mistake listenin' to that serpent;there probable wuzn't but one then, and that's the way they have jestoverrun the garden, her payin' attention and listenin' to it. Femalescan't seem to look ahead. " And I sez, "Why didn't Adam do as you always do, Josiah, ketch up astick and put an end to it?" I always holler to Josiah if I see asnake and he makes way with it. But such talk is onprofitable. But Josiah hadn't a doubt but this wasthe Garden of Eden and talked fluent about it. One odd thing here in Ceylon is that foxes have wings and can fly. Josiah wanted to get one the worse way; he said that he wouldwillin'ly carry it home in his arms for the sake of havin' it flyround over Jonesville, and sez he, "They are so smart, Samantha, theywill git drunk jest as naterally as men do, they would feel to home inAmerica. " And they say they do steal palm wine out of bowls set toketch it by the natives and are found under the trees too drunk to githome, not havin' wives or children willin' to lead 'em home, I spoze, or accomidatin' policemen. But I sez, "Don't you try to git the animals in America to drinkin', Josiah Allen. " Sez I, "I should be mortified to death to see the oldmair or Snip staggerin' round as men do, lookin' maudlin and silly; Ishould despise the idee of lowerin' the animals down to that state. " "Well, well, I don't spoze I can git one of these foxes anyway, thoughI might, " sez he dreamily, "git one real drunk and carry it. " But Iguess he'll gin it up. The jungles all round us wuz, I spoze, filled with wild animals. Elephants, tigers and serpents, big and little, besides monkeys andmore harmless ones. The snake charmers did dretful strange things with'em, but I didn't look on. I always said that if snakes would let mealone, I would let them alone. But they brought all sorts of things tosell: embroideries of all kinds, carved ivory, tortoise shell and allkinds of jewels. Paris and London gits some of their finest jewelshere. Men and wimmen are all bejewelled from head to foot, children up toten years of age are almost always naked, but wearin' bracelets, anklets and silver belts round their little brown bodies, sometimeswith bells attached. Some of the poorer natives chew beetle nuts whichmake their teeth look some like an old tobacco chewer's. They eat incommon out of a large bowl and I spoze they don't use napkins orfinger bowls. But unlike the poor in our frozen winter cities, asArvilly said, there is little danger of their starving; warm they willbe from year's end to year's end, and the bread tree and cocoanut palmsupply food, and the traveller's palm supplies a cool, deliciousdrink. There is one palm tree here--the talipot--that blooms whenabout forty years old with a loud noise and immegiately dies. Arvillysaid that they made her think of some political candidates. Dorothy and Robert Strong and Miss Meechim wanted to go to Kandy, thecapital of Ceylon, only seventy milds away, to see the tooth ofBoodha. Miss Meechim said she wanted to weep over it. She is kinderromantic in spots, and Josiah hearn her and said, soty vosey, to me, "You won't ketch me weepin' over any tooth unless it is achin' likethe Old Harry. " But I kinder wanted to see the tooth. I had hearn Thomas J. Read agood deal about Prince Siddartha, Lord Buddha, and how he wuz "rightgentle, though so wise, princely of mean, yet softly mannered, modest, deferent and tender hearted, though of fearless blood, " and how herenounced throne and wealth and love for his people, to "seekdeliverance and the unknown light. " I had always pictured him as looking more beautiful than any othermortal man, but of this more anon. Josiah and Arvilly concluded to go too; it wuz only a four hours'ride. We passed coffee plantations, immense gardens and forests fullof ebony trees, the strange banion tree that seems to walk off allround itself and plant its great feet solidly in the earth, and thenstep off agin, makin' a hull forest of itself, and satin wood trees, and India rubber, bamboo, balsam, bread fruit, pepper and cinchony orquinine bushes, tea and rice plantations. Our road led up the mountainside and anon the city of Kandy could be seen sot down in a sort of avalley on the mountain. We had our dinner at the Queen's Hotel, andfrom there sallied out to see the sights. Not fur from the hotel wuz aartificial lake three milds round, built by some king. His very nameis forgotten, whilst the water of this little lake he dug out splashesup on the shore jest as fresh as ever. All round the lake is abeautiful driveway, where all sorts of vehicles wuz seen. Bigbarouches full of English people, down to a little two-wheeled cartdrawed by one ox. Crowds of people, jewels, bright color, anon a poorwoman carrying her baby astride her hip, men, wimmen, children, abrilliant, movin' panorama. The tooth of Buddha is kep' in a temple called Maligawa, or Temple ofthe Tooth, and I laid out to have a considerable number of emotions asI stood before it. But imagine a tooth bigger than a hull tooth brush!What kind of a mouth must Lord Buddha have had if that wuz a sample ofhis teeth? Why, his mouth, at the least calculation, must have been asbig as a ten-quart pan! Where wuz the beauty and charm of thatcountenance--that mouth that had spoke such wise words? I don't believe it wuz his tooth. I hain't no idee it wuz. No humanbein' ever had a mouth big enough to hold thirty odd monsters likethat, let alone this noble prince, "with godlike face and eyesenwrapped, lost in care for them he knew not, save as fellow lives. "There is a mistake somewhere. There wuz lots of natives roundworshippin' it. But I felt that if Prince Siddartha could speak out ofNirvana he would say: "Don't worship that tooth, Josiah Allen's wife; it hain't minenor never wuz; but worship the principles of love and compassionand self-sacrifice I tried to teach to my people. " And almostinstinctively I sez, "I will, Prince Siddartha, I will. " And Josiah sez: "What say, Samantha?" And I sez: "Let's go out, Josiah, and see the sacred tree, Bo, that theyworship. " "I'll go, " sez Josiah, "but you won't git me to worship no tree, I cantell you that. I've cleared off too many acres and chopped and sawedtoo much cord wood to worship a tree. " "Did I ask you to, Josiah?" sez I. "It would break my heart to see youbend your knee to any idol. But this is the oldest tree in the world;it is over two thousand years old. " "Wall, it ort to be cut down, Samantha, if it is that age; it isseasoned and would make crackin' good lumber. " Oh, how oncongenial Josiah Allen is by spells; he seemed to be quite adistance off from me as he made them remarks. But Robert Strong andDorothy shared my feelin's of reverence for a tree whose mightybranches might have shaded the head of our Lord and whose leaves mighthave rustled with the wind that swept the brow of Napoleon and Cæsarand Pharo for all I knew. There wuz some natives burnin' camphorflowers before it and some on 'em had hung up little lamps in itsbranches. They say that one hundred thousand pilgrims visit it eachyear. Well, we driv round some, seein' all the strange, picturesquesights; past tea plantations and a tea factory, the botanical gardenswhere we driv milds through its beautiful tree shaded avenoos; thereare twenty-five thousand kinds of plants here in this garden; some sayit is the finest collection in the world. And we driv past some of thenative dwellings, and some beautiful villas where Europeans livedurin' the warm season, past the library, a beautiful buildingstanding on pillars on the shores of the lake, and by the Governor'spalace, handsome enough for any king and queen, and we got back toColombo middlin' late and tired out. But as tired as Josiah wuz hetalked considerable to me about "Bud, " as familiar as if he wuz wellacquainted with him, but I sez, "You mean B-u-d-d-h, Josiah. " But Ithought to myself as the Chinese have five thousand different namesfor him one more wouldn't neither make nor break him. Well, the next day we embarked for Calcutta. Our steamer stopped twomilds off from Madras. The wind was so high we couldn't get anynearer. None of our party went ashore but Robert Strong. He wuz tiedinto an arm-chair and swung off by ropes down into a little boat thatwuz dashin' up and down fur below. I wouldn't done it fur a dollar bill. The surf boats are deep, made ofbark and bamboo, shaped some like our Indian canoes. But no matter howmuch the winds blew or the boats rocked, lots of native peddlers comeaboard to sell jewelry, fans, dress stuffs; and snake charmers come, and fakirs, doin' their strange tricks, that I d'no how they do, norJosiah don't. Madras has more than half a million inhabitants, and it looked wellfrom the steamer: handsome villas, beautiful tropical trees, and hullforests of cactus ablaze with their gorgeous blossoms. It bein' Sundaywhilst on our way from Madras to Calcutta the captain read service, and afterwards made his Sunday inspection of the crew. The sailorsand cooks wuz Hindus, the stewards English and Scotch. The crew had onshort white trousers, long white jackets and white caps, all on 'emwuz barefooted. We sailed acrost the Bay of Bengal, where I spoze Bengal tigers wuzhidin' in the adjacent jungles, though we didn't meet any and didn'twant to. And so on to the Hoogly River; one of the mouths of theGanges, and on to Calcutta. Calcutta is over four thousand milds from Hongkong. And oh, my heart!how fur! how fur from Jonesville. Most fourteen thousand milds fromour own vine and apple trees and the children. It made my head turnround so that I tried to furgit it. CHAPTER XXI As we approached Calcutta we seemed to be travellin' through biggardens more beautiful than our own country can boast of; rich, strange, tropical trees and shrubs and flowers grew luxuriant aroundthe pleasant villas. The English district with its white two-storyhouses made me think some of an American village. We went to the GreatEastern Hotel, right opposite the gardens of the Viceroy's palace. We had pleasant rooms that would have been pretty hot, but great fansare swung up in our room and the hired help swing 'em by a rope thatgoes out into the hall. It beats all how much help there is here, thehalls seemed full on 'em, but what would our hired help say if we made'em dress like these Hindus? They wear short pantaloons that don'tcome down to their knees and then they wind a long strip of whitecloth round their thighs and fasten it round their waist, leavin'their right shoulder and arm bare naked. An American family of fourlivin' in Calcutta have thirty servants, ten of 'em pullin' at thesepunkeys or fans. They don't eat in the house of their employer; but ina cabin outside. There is a long, beautiful street called The Strand, shaded by banyanand palm trees; on one side on't is the park so lovely that it iscalled the Garden of Eden, full of beautiful trees, shrubs andflowers, pagodas, little temples and shrines. Josiah and I and Tommywent there in the evenin' and hearn beautiful music. Josiah wanted toride in a palanquin. It is a long black box and looks some like ahearse. I hated to see him get in, it made me forebode. But he enjoyedhis ride, and afterwards I sot off in one, Josiah in one also nigh bywith Tommy. One side of it comes off so you can git in and set on ahigh cushion and read or knit. I took my knittin' and most knit one ofJosiah's heels whilst I rid by palaces and elephants and camels andfakirs and palm trees. Oh, Jonesville yarn! you never expected to beknit amid seens like this. I can knit and admire scenery first rate, and my blue and white yarn seemed to connect me with Jonesville insome occult way, and then I knew Josiah would need his socks before wegot home. Seein' that the other ladies did so I had throwed my braize veilgracefully over my head instead of my bunnet. The natives are as fondof jewels here as they are in Ceylon. Women with not a rag on down totheir waists will have four or five chains on, and bangles on theirnaked arms. They spend all their earnin's on these ornaments and wear'em day and night. Well, seein' they don't have any other clotheshardly, mebby it is best for 'em to keep holt on 'em. We went by some wimmen preparin' manure for fuel; it wuz made intolumps and dried. The wimmen wuz workin' away all covered with chainsand bangles and rings; Josiah looked on 'em engaged in that menial andonwelcome occupation, and sez he: "To see wimmen to work in the barnyard, Samantha, has put a new ideeinto my head. " I never asked him what it wuz, but spozed it had reference to Philuryand mebby me, but I shall never go into that work, never. One day we went to the American mission school and see the nativechildren settin' flat on the floor. Josiah wuz awful worked up to see'em settin' down in such a oncomfortable posture, and he said to methat if he had some tools and lumber he would make 'em some seats. Butthat is their way of settin' to study their lessons. Among 'em wuz a little girl with a red spot on her forward, indicatin'that she wuz married, but don't spoze that she had gone to keepin'house yet. Girls are married sometimes at six or seven, but theirhusbands don't claim 'em till they're ten or twelve. Good land!they're nothin' but babies then; I used to hold Tirzah Ann on my lapat that age. Widders never marry again, and are doomed to a wretchedlife of degradation and slavery; I guess that is the reason why someon 'em had ruther be burnt up with their relics than to live on tosuffer so. How much they need the religion of love and mercy ourSaviour come to teach! Our missionaries are doin' a blessed work, literally loosin' the chains of the captives, and settin' at libertythem that are bound. One evenin' we met a bridal procession, the groom was ridin' in apeacock-shaped gilt chariot drawed by four horses, accompanied by aband of music; a big crowd of friends follered him, and cooliesbearing torches; it seemed as if he wanted to show himself off all hecould. When they got to the house of the bride, they took her in aclosed palanquin and meached away to the house of the groom. As insome other countries, females play a minor part in the tune of life;wimmen and children can't eat at the table with their husband andfather, and he sets to the table and she sets down on the floor. Miss Meechim exclaimed loudly about the awful position of wimmen here, but Arvilly told her that "though wimmen at home had crep' up a littleso she could set to the table and pour the tea, yet at banquets ofhonor she wuz never seen and at the political table, where men proudlysot and partook, wimmen still sot on the floor and couldn't git abite. " Miss Meechim didn't dain a reply, but turned her talk onto the dretfulidee of widders bein' burnt with their dead husbands. The Englishwon't allow it where they can help it, but it is still practised inway back regions, and Arvilly said that she believed that someAmerican widders, who had had their property took from them by thefamily of the deceased and had their unborn children willed away from'em by law, suffered enough sight more than they would if they hadburnt themselves up with their relics; to say nothin' of widders bein'burnt up twice in America, first through their own fiery agony, andthen seein' their children sot fire to by whiskey dealt to 'em by thewill of the rulers of the land. Arvilly always would have the last word. Miss Meechim kinder snortedand tosted her head and held in. I spoze it wuz partly on Robert Strong's account, he bein' highconnected and rich, that we wuz all invited to a garden party gin byMr. And Miss Curzon, she that wuz Miss Leiter, who used to be one ofour neighbors, as you may say, out in Chicago, U. S. And then I spozethat it wuz partly on my account, they'd hearn of me, without anydoubt, and craved a augience. Josiah thought that it wuz on hisaccount that we wuz invited; he thinks he is a ornament to any festivethrong. But 'tennyrate invited we wuz, and go we did, the hull caboodle on us, all but Tommy, who stayed to home with the good English maid that MissMeechim had hired to take Aronette's place, but never, never to fillit. Oh, Aronette! sweet girl! where are you? Where are you? So my heartcalled out time and time agin; sometimes in the dead of night on mywakeful pillow, and anon when I wuz lookin' for her in places that Ididn't want to find her. So did Dorothy's heart call out to her. Iknew she wuz lookin' for her always, seekin' her with sad eyes full oftears, looking, longing for the playmate of her childhood, the loving, gentle helper and companion of her youth. Miss Meechim didn't speak of her so often as she thought of her, Ibelieve; but she grew thin after her loss, and when grief for a personploughs away your flesh you can call yourself a mourner. She lost fivepounds and a half in less than a month; next to Dorothy she lovedher. [Illustration: We wuz all invited to a garden party, gin by Mr. And MissCurzon. --Page 240. ] Arvilly openly and often bewailed the loss of the one she loved nextto Waitstill Webb; I wuzn't anywhere in Arvilly's affections to whatshe wuz, though she sets store by me, and Tommy cried himself to sleepmany a night talking about her, and wonnerin' where she wuz, and ifsomebody wuz abusin' her, or if she wuz to the bottom of the ocean. Why, he would rack my mind and pierce my heart so I would have to givehim candy to get his mind off; I used pounds in that way, though Iknew it wuz hurtful, but didn't know what to do. We often thought and spoke of poor Lucia, too, and that poorbroken-hearted father who wuz searching through the world for her andwould never stop his mournful search till he found her, or till deathfound him, but our hearts didn't ache for her as they did for the lossof our own. Martha wuz a kind, good girl, but she wuzn't Aronette, our dear one, our lost one. She wuz jest a helper doin' her work and earnin' herwages, that wuz all, but she was good natured and offered to lookafter Tommy, and we all went to the Viceroy's reception and gardenparty and had a real good time. The palace of the Viceroy is a beautiful structure. It is only twostories high, but each story full and running over with beauty. I d'nobut the widder Albert's house goes ahead of this, but it don't seem asif it could, it don't seem as if Solomon's or the Queen of Sheba'scould look any better. Though of course I never neighbored with MissSheba, bein' considerable younger than she, and never got round tovisit the widder Albert, though I always wanted to, and spoze Idisappointed her that year when I wuz in London, and kep' by businessand P. Martin Smythe from visitin' her. Miss Curzon is a real handsome woman, and always wuz when she was aneighborin' girl, as you may say, in Chicago, but the high positionshe's in now has gin nobility to her mean, and the mantilly of dignityshe wears sets well on her. She seemed real glad to see me; she had hearn on me, so she said, andshe said she had laughed some when she read my books, and had criedtoo, and I sez, "I hope you didn't cry because you felt obleeged toread 'em, or somebody made you. " And she sez, "No, " and she went on furder to say how they had soothedthe trials of a relative, aged ninety, and had been a stay and solaceto one of her pa's great aunts. And a bystander standin' by come up and introduced himself and saidhow much my books had done for some relations of his mother-in-law whohad read 'em in Sing Sing and the Tombs. And after considerable suchinterestin' and agreeable conversation Miss Curzon branched off andasked me if there wuz any new news at home. And I sez, "No; things are goin' in the same old way. Your pa's folksare in good health so fur as I know, and the rest of the four hundredare so as to git about, for I hear on 'em to horse shows and huntin'foxes acrost the country and playin' tee or tee he. " She said, "Yes, golf wuz gettin' to be very popular in America. " And Iwent on with what little news I could about the most important folks. Sez I: "Mr. And Miss Roosvelt are well, and well thought on. He is a manlyman and a gentle gentleman. The sample of goodness, loyalty and commonsense they are workin' out there in the White House ort to be copiedby all married men and their wives. If they did the divorce lawyerswould starve to death--or go into some other business. "I set store by 'em both. Theodore tries to quell the big monopoliesand look out for the people. I've advised him and he has follered myadvice more or less. But you can't do everything in a minute, and thepolitical bosses and the Liquor Power are rulin' things about the sameas ever. Big trusts are flourishin', Capital covered with gold anddiamonds is settin' on the bent back of Labor, drivin' the poorcritter where they want to, and the Man with the Hoe is hoein' awayjest as usual and don't get the pay for it he'd ort to. " And hereArvilly broke in (she had been introduced), and sez she, "Uncle Sam isgirdin' up his lions and stands with a chip on his shoulder ready tostep up and take a round with any little republic that don't want tobe benevolently assimilated. " But I spoke right up, and sez, "He is a good-hearted creeter, UncleSam is, but needs a adviser time and agin, and not bein' willin' tolet wimmen have a word to say, I d'no what will become on him; bime-bymebby he'll see that he had better hearn to me. " Jest then we hearn a bystander standin' nigh by us talkin' about thelast news from Russia, and I sez to Miss Curzon, "It is too bad aboutthe war, hain't it?" And she sez, "Yes indeed!" She felt dretful aboutit, I could see, and I sez, "So do I. You and I can't stop it, MissCurzon; a few ambitious or quarrelsome or greedy politicians will makea war and then wimmen have to stand it. There hain't nothin' right init, seein' they are half of the world, and men couldn't have got intothe world at all if it hadn't been for wimmen, and then when wimmenhas got 'em here, and took care on 'em till they can run alone, thenthey go to bossin' her round the first thing and makin' her no end oftrouble, makin' wars and things. " And she said she felt jest so, too. "But, " sez I, "excuse me for introducin' personal and politicalmatters on festive boards" (we wuz standin' on a kind of a platformbuilt up on the green and velvety grass). Sez I, "I am real glad tosee you lookin' so well, and your companion, too. " She did lookhandsome as a picter, and handsomer enough sight than some, chromosand such. And seein' that she had so many to talk to, I withdrawedmyself, but as I kinder backed myself off I backed right into Arvilly, who wuz takin' out the "Twin Crimes" out of her work-bag, and I sez, "Arvilly, you shall not canvass Miss Curzon to-night. " And she sez, "I'd like to see you stop me, Josiah Allen's wife, if Iset out to do anything. " She looked real beligerent. But I got herinto a corner and appealed to her shiverly and pity, and finally I gother to put her book up in her work-bag. Arvilly is good-hearted ifyou know how to manage her. I knew Miss Curzon would be tired enoughto drop down before we all got away, without being canvassed, if shehas got two hundred hired help in the house. Well, we roamed along through the beautiful walks, sweet with perfumeand balmy with flowers, brilliant with innumerable lights, andthronged with a gaily dressed crowd and the air throbbing withentrancing strains of music. Robert Strong looked noble and handsome that night; I wuz proud tothink he belonged to our party. He didn't need uniforms and ribbonsand stars and orders to proclaim his nobility, no more than his Cityof Justice needed steeples. It shone out of his liniment so everybodycould see it. It seemed that he and Mr. Curzon wuz old friends; theytalked together like brothers. Dorothy wuz as sweet as a posy in her pretty pink frock, trimmed withwhite rosies, and her big, white picture hat--the prettiest girlthere, I thought; and I believe Robert thought so, too--he acted as ifhe did. And Miss Meechim wuz in her element. The halls of the nobleand gay wuz where her feet loved to linger. And she seemed to look upto me more than ever after she see my long interview with Lady Curzon, as she called her. Josiah and I returned to our tarven, but the rest of the party wantedto stay some later. We wanted dretfully to go to Benares, and on toAgra so's to see that wonderful monument to Wedded Love--the TajMahal--I spoze the most beautiful building in the hull world; andcertainly it is rared up to as noble a sentiment; and its being a kindof rareity, too, made me want to see it the worst kind. But we had loitered so on our travels that we had to hurry up a littlein order to arrive at the Paris Exposition the Fourth of July--UnitedStates day. I felt that I couldn't bear to git there any later andkeep France a-waitin' for us, a-worryin' for fear we wouldn't gitthere at all, so we went post-haste from Calcutta to Bombay and fromthere to Cairo and on to Marseilles; though we laid out to stop longenough in Cairo to take a tower in Jerusalem. Holy Land, wuz I, indeed, to see thee? We wuz considerable tired when we got to Bombay. The railroads in Injyare not like the Empire Express; though, as we drew near Bombay, thescenery wuz grand; some like our own Sierra Nevada's. Only a few milds back from the railroad, tigers, panthers and allsorts of fierce animals wuz to home to callers, but we didn't try tovisit 'em. At some places the trees along the road wuz full ofmonkeys, chatterin' and talkin' in their own language which theyunderstood, so I spoze; and there wuz the most beautiful birds I eversaw. The climate wuz delightful, some like June days in dearJonesville. Bombay is on an island, with many bridges connecting it to themainland. We went to a tarven close to Bombay Bay; the wide verandasfull of flowers and singin' birds made it pleasant. We got good thingsto eat here; oh, how Josiah enjoyed the good roast beef and eggs andbread, most as good as Jonesville bread. Though it seemed kinder queerto me, and I don't think Miss Meechim and Arvilly enjoyed it at all tohave our chamber work done by barelegged men. I told Josiah that I didn't know but I ort to have a Ayah or maidwhilst I wuz there, and he said with considerable justice that heguessed he could ayah me all that wuz necessary. And so he could, I didn't need no other chaperone. But the Bombayladies never stir out without their Ayah, and ladies don't go out inthe streets much anyway. The market here in Bombay wuz the finest I ever see; it has abeautiful flower garden and park attached to it, and little rills ofclear water run through the stun gutters. Tropical fruit andvegetables of all kinds wuz to be seen here. The native market wimmendidn't have on any clothes hardly, but made it up in jewelry. Some on'em weighin' out beef to customers would have five or six long goldchains hanging down to their waist. Bombay has a population of abouta million, a good many English, some Hindus, Persians, Chinese, Siamese, Turks, and about one-tenth are Parsees, sun-worshippers. Theyare many of them wealthy and live in beautiful villas a little out ofthe city; they are very intelligent and firm friends of the English. The Parsees dress in very rich silks and satin, the men in pantaloonsof red or orange and long frocks of gorgeous colored silk; they wearhigh-pinted black caps, gold chains and rings and look dretfuldressy. Josiah loved their looks dearly, and he sez dreamily, "What a showsuch a costoom would make in Jonesville; no circus ever went throughthere that would attract so much attention, " and he added, "theiridees about the sun hain't so fur out of the way. The sun duz give allthe heat and light we have, and it is better to worship that thansnakes and bulls. " My land! had that man a idee of becomin' a Parsee? I sez, "JosiahAllen, be you a Methodist deacon, or be you not? Are you a-backslidin'or hain't you?" Sez I, "You had better ask the help of him who madethe sun and the earth to keep you from wobblin'. " He wuz real huffy and sez, "Well, I say it, and stick to it, that itis better to worship the sun than it is to worship snakes, " and cometo think it over, I didn't know but it wuz. The Parsees live together in big families of relations, sometimesfifty. They do not bury their dead, but put 'em up in high towers, calledTowers of Silence. And I believe my soul that I'd ruther be put up inthe sky than down in the mouldy earth. Jest a little way from this Tower of Silence is the spot where theBrahmans burn their dead; there are so many that the fires are kep'burnin' all the time. And a little ways off is the place where theEnglish bury their dead. And I d'no but one way is as good as another. The pale shadder of thereal tower of silence has fell on 'em all and silenced 'em. It don'tmake much difference what becomes of the husk that is wropped roundthe wheat. The freed soul soarin' off to its own place wouldn't carewhat become of the wornout garment it dropped in its flight. But to resoom: We all went out for a drive through the streets; Josiahand I and Arvilly and little Tommy in a little two-wheeled cartsettin' facin' each other drawed by two buffalo cows. Robert andDorothy and Miss Meechim occupied another jest ahead on us. The driversot on the tongue of the wagon, and would pull their tails instead ofwhippin' 'em when he wanted 'em to go faster. The cows' ears wuz alltrimmed off with bells and gay streamers of cotton cloth, and theirtails had big red bows on 'em, and Josiah whispered to me: "You see, Samantha, if I don't get some ear and tail trimmin' for oldBrindle and Lineback when I git home; our cows are goin' to have someadvantage of our tower if they couldn't travel with us. And, " sez he, "what a show we could make, Samantha, ridin' in to meetin' behind 'em;bells a-jinglin' and ribbins a-flyin', I dressed in a long silk frockand you all covered with jewelry. " "Well, " sez I (wantin' to break up the idee to once), "if we do that, I must be buyin' some jewelry right away. " "Oh, Samantha, " sez he anxiously, "can't you take a joke? I wouldn'tdrive anything but the old mair for love or money. And your cameo pinis so beautiful and so becoming to you. " We went by a good many Parsees in that drive, and Arvilly sez, "Theylook so rich somehow, I believe I shall try to canvass some on 'em. "And that afternoon about sundown she seein' one on 'em goin' into alittle garden she follered him in; he wuz dressed in such a gorgeousway that she wuz almost sure of a customer, but jest as she wuzgettin' the "Twin Crimes" out of her work-bag, he took off his outerfrock, lain it down on the ground and knelt down, facin' the sunset, and sprinkled his head, breast and hands three times from a littledish he had with him, and then begun to pray and kep' up his devotionsfor half an hour, and Arvilly of course not wantin' to break up ameetin' put her book into her work-bag and went away. I kinder likethe idee of their worshippin' under the blue dome of heaven, though ofcourse I didn't like their idee of worshippin' the created instead ofthe Creator. In travellin' through these countries more and more everyday did I feel to thank the Lord that I wuz a member of the M. E. Meetin' house in Jonesville, U. S. , a humble follower of him who wentabout doing good, but I didn't feel like goin' on as Miss Meechim did. How she did look down on the Parsees and compared 'em to the Piscopalsto their immense disadvantage. But Arvilly, the iconoclast, sez, "These Parsees boast that there isnot a pauper or woman of bad character in the hull of their sect, andI wonder if any other religious sect in America could say as much asthat, Miss Meechim?" Miss Meechim turned her head away and sniffed some; she hates to enterinto a argument with Arvilly, but she wuz gittin' real worked up and Idon't know how it would have ended, but I spoke right up and quotedsome Bible to 'em, thinkin' mebby that it might avert a storm. Sez I, "Charity vaunteth not itself. Charity thinketh no evil, suffereth long and is kind. " I meant both on 'em to take it, and I meant to take some on't myself. I knowed that I wuz sometimes a little hash with my beloved pardner. But a woman, if she don't want to be run over has to work every way tokeep a man's naterel overbeariness quelled down. I worship him and heknows it, and if I didn't use headwork he would take advantage of thatworship and tromple on me. But though Arvilly didn't canvass the Parsee, she sold several copiesof the "Twin Crimes" to English residents who seemed to hail the ideeof meeting a Yankee book-agent in the Orient with gladness. CHAPTER XXII Dorothy and Miss Meechim and Robert Strong went over to an island onthe bay to see the caves of Elephanta, the great underground temple, one hall of which is one hundred and fifty feet long, the loftyceilin' supported by immense columns, and three smaller halls, thewalls of all on 'em richly sculptured. Whose hands made them statutes? I don't know nor Josiah don't and Iguess nobody duz. There wuz a thoughtful look on Dorothy's sweet facewhen she came home, and Robert Strong too seemed walkin' in a reverie, but Miss Meechim wuz as pert as ever; it takes more than a cave todant her. One place in Bombay I liked first rate, a hospital for dumb animals, it is kep' by a sect called the Jains. Sick animals of all kinds arecared for: horses, cows, dogs, cats, rats and I spoze any ailin'creeter from a mouse up to a elephant is nursed with tender care. Sez Josiah, "No matter what her creed is, Samantha, that Jane is agood creeter and is doin' a great work, I would send the old mair herein a minute if she wuz took with consumption or janders or anythin', if it wuzn't so fur, and I'd tell Jane jest how much I thought on herfor her goodness. " Sez I, "Josiah, it is a sect, not a female. " But he wouldn't gin in and talks about Jane a sight now when herecalls about the horrers of vivisection or when he sees animalsabused and horses driv too hard and overloaded--he always sez: "I would like to have Jane see that, I guess Jane would put a stop tothat pretty lively. " Well, it shows Josiah's good heart. The Hindus have several temples in Bombay. One of the great days isthe Festival of the Serpents. Snake charmers bring to this place thedeadly snakes which are then fed to propitiate them, by the priests, Ispoze. Oh, how Miss Meechim went on about the idee of worshippin' snakes, andit wuz perfectly dretful to me too, I must confess. But Arvilly alwaysputtin' her oar in and always hash on our govermunt, sez: "Why, what is this different from what we do in America?" Miss Meechim's eyes snapped, she wuz madder than a wet hen, butArvilly went on, "Every 'lection time hain't the great serpent of theliquor power fed and pampered by the law-makers of our country?" Miss Meechim didn't reply; I guess she dassent, and I didn't sayanything, and Arvilly went on: "Our serpent worship is as bad agin as these Hindus', for after theirsnakes are fed and worshipped they shet 'em up agin so they can't doany harm. But after lawmakers propitiate the serpent with money andinfluence, they let it loose to wreathe round the bright young livesand noble manhood and crunch and destroy 'em in its deadly folds, leavin' the slime of agony and death in its tracks all over ourcountry from North to South, East to West. It don't look well afterall this for an American to act horrified at feedin' a snake a littlemilk and shettin' it up in a box. " She wuz fairly shakin' withindignation, and Miss Meechim dast as well die as dispute her agin. And I didn't say a word to harrer her up any more, for I knew wellwhat she had went through. We only stayed a few days in Bombay, and then took the steamer andwent straight acrost the Arabian Sea, stopping at Aden for a littlewhile, and then up the Red Sea; on one side on us, Arabia, and on theother, Africa. Aden, where we stopped for a short time, is a dreary lookin' littleplace with seventy or eighty thousand natives livin' a little backfrom the shore, while the few English people there live near thecoast. Beautiful ostrich feathers are obtained there from the manyostrich farmers living near, as well as the Mocha coffee, which madeover a Jonesville stove by a Jonesville woman has so often cheered theheart and put to flight the worrisome passions of a Josiah. But inmost of these tropical countries, where you'd think you could git thebest, I didn't find coffee half so good as I made it myself, thoughmebby I ortn't to say it. We saw some wonderful jugglers here. They will draw out great bunchesof natural flowers from most anywhere that you wouldn't expect 'em tobe, and call birds down or out of some place onseen by us; mebby theycome from the mysterious gardens of a Carabi's home, and those greatbunches of roses, I d'no from what invisible rose bushes they wuzpicked; mebby they growed up tall and stately on either side of theEther avenues that surround us on every side. Mebby Carabi lives rightunder the shade of some on 'em, but 'tennyrate some of these flowersthey made out of nothin' I took right into my hands, great, soft, dewyroses, with seemin'ly the same dew and perfume on 'em they have whenpicked in our earthly gardens. And we saw some wonderful divers there;they did such strange things that it wuz fairly skairful to see 'em. If you would throw a small coin down into the water, they would diveway down, down with both hands full of balls and bring up the coin intheir teeth, showing that they picked it up offen the bottom withouttouching their hands to it. Good land! I couldn't do it to save mylife in our cistern or wash bowl, let alone the deep, deep sea. As we entered the Red Sea we passed through the narrer channel calledThe Straits of Bab-el-Mandeb, Gate of Tears, named so on account ofthe many axidents that have happened there. But we got through safelyand sailed on towards Suez. So we went on past the coasts of Abyssinia, Nubia. Fur off we seeMount Sineii, sacred mount, where the Law wuz given to Moses. Oh, my soul, think on't! To see the very spot where Moses stood andtalked to the Almighty face to face. It is only three hundred mildsfrom Suez. We sailed directly over the place where the Israelites passed over dryshod whilst their enemies, the Egyptians, wuz overwhelmed by thewaters. The persecuted triumphant and walkin' a-foot into safety, while Tyranny and Oppression wuz drownded. I wish them waters wuz swashin' up to-day and closin' in on theOppressor, not to drownd 'em, mebby, but to give 'em a pretty goodduckin'. But I spoze the walls of water like as not is risin' on eachside on 'em onbeknown to them, and when the time comes, when the buglesounds, they will rush in and overwhelm the armies of Greed andTyranny and the oppressed. Them that are forced to make brick withoutstraw, or without sand hardly, will be free, and go on rejoicin' intothe land of Promise. But to resoom: It is three thousand milds from Bombay to Suez, but itwuz all safely passed and we found ourselves in Cairo in a mostcomfortable hotel, and felt after all our wanderings in fur off landsthat we agin breathed the air of civilization almost equal toJonesville. We found some letters here from home. I had a letter from Tirzah Annand one from Thomas Jefferson. His letter wuz full of gratitude toheaven and his ma for his dear little boy's restored strength andhealth. He and Maggie wuz lookin' and waitin' with eager hearts andopen arms to greet us, and the time wuz long to 'em I could see, though he didn't say so. Tirzah Ann's letter contained strange news of our neighbor, MissDeacon Sypher. Her devotion to her husband has been told by me moreformally, it is worthy the pen of poet and historian. She lived andbreathed in the Deacon, marked all her clothes, M. D. S. , Miss DeaconSypher. Her hull atmosphere wuz Deacon, her goal wuz his happiness, her heaven his presence. Well, a year ago she got hurt on the sidewalk to Jonesville, and theDeacon sued the village and got five hundred dollars for her brokenleg. He took the money and went out to the Ohio on a pleasure trip, and to visit some old neighbors. It made talk, for folks said thatwhen she worshipped him so he ort to stayed by her, but he hired shethat wuz Betsy Bobbett to stay with her, and he went off on thispleasure trip and had a splendid good time, and with the rest of themoney he bought a span of mules. Miss Sypher wuz deadly afraid of 'em. But the Deacon wanted 'em, and so they made her happily agonized, shewuz so afraid of their heels and their brays, and so highly tickledwith the Deacon's joy. Well, it turned out queer as a dog, but justafter we started on our trip abroad Tirzah said that the Deacon felland broke his leg in the same place and the same spot on the sidewalk;the Jonesvillians are slack, it wuzn't mended proper. And Miss Sypherthought that she would git some money jest as he did. She didn't thinkon't for quite a spell, Tirzah writ. She wuz so bound up in the Deaconand never left his side night or day, nor took off her clothes only towash 'em for two weeks, jest bent over his couch and drowged roundwaitin' on him, for he wuz dretful notional and hard to git alongwith. But she loved to be jawed at, dearly, for she said it made herthink he would git along, and when he would find fault with her andthrow things, she smiled gladly, thinkin' it wuz a good sign. Well, when he got a little better so she could lay down herself andrest a little, the thought come to her that she would git some moneyfor his broken leg jest as he had for hern. She thought that she wouldlike to buy him a suit of very nice clothes and a gold chain, andbuild a mule barn for the mules, but the law wouldn't give Miss DeaconSypher a cent; the law said that if anything wuz gin it would go tothe Deacon's next of kin, a brother who lived way off in theMichigan. The Deacon owned her bones, but she didn't own the Deacon's! And I wonnered at it as much as Tommy ever wonnered over anything whyher broken limb, and all the emoluments from it, belonged to him, andhis broken leg and the proprietary rights in it belonged to a man wayout in the Michigan that he hadn't seen for ten years and didn't speketo (owin' to trouble about property), and after Miss Deacon Sypher hadworshipped him and waited on him for thirty years like a happy surf. Well, so it wuz. I said it seemed queer, but Arvilly said that itwuzn't queer at all. She sez: "One of my letters from home to-day hada worse case in it than that. " Sez she, "You remember Willie Henzy, Deacon Henzy's grandchild, in Brooklyn. You know how he got run overand killed by a trolley car. " "Yes, " sez I, "sweet little creeter; Sister Henzy told me about itwith the tears runnin' down her cheeks. They all worshipped thatchild, he wuz jest as pretty and bright as he could be, and he wuz theonly boy amongst all the grandchildren; it is a blow Deacon Henzy willnever git over. And his ma went into one faintin' fit after anotherwhen he wuz brought home, and will never be a well woman agin, and hispa's hair in three months grew gray as a rat; it 'most killed all on'em. " "Well, " sez Arvilly, "what verdict do you think that fool broughtin?" "What fool?" sez I. "The law!" sez Arvilly sternly. "The judge brought in a verdict of onedollar damages; it said that children wuzn't wage-earners andtherefore they wuzn't worth any more. " I throwed my arms 'round Tommy onbeknown to me, and sez I, "Millionsand millions of money wouldn't pay your grandma for you. " And Tommywonnered and wonnered that a little boy's life wuzn't worth more thana dollar. "Why, " sez I, "the law gives twenty dollars for a two-year-oldheifer. " "Yes, " sez Arvilly, "the law don't reckon Willie Henzy's life worth somuch as a yearlin' calf or a dog. But they can do jest as they please;these great monopolies have spun their golden web round politiciansand office-seekers and office-holders and rule the whole country. Theycan set their own valuation on life and limb, and every dollar theycan save in bruised flesh and death and agony, is one more dollar todivide amongst the stockholders. " "Well, " sez I, "we mustn't forgit to be megum, Arvilly; we mustn'tforgit in our indignation all the good they do carryin' folks fromhether to yon for almost nothin'. " "Well, they no need to act more heartless than Nero or King Herod. Idon't believe that old Nero himself would done this; I believe hewould gin two dollars for Willie Henzy. " And I sez, "I never neighbored with Mr. Nero. But if I could git holtof that judge, " sez I, "he would remember it to his dyin' day. " "He wouldn't care for what you said, " sez Arvilly; "he got his pay. There hain't any of these big monopolies got any more soul than astun-boat. " It is only nine hours from Suez to Cairo. How often have I spoke ofthe great desert of Sarah in hours of Jonesville mirth and sadness, little thinkin' that I should ever cross it in this mortal spear, butwe did pass through a corner on't and had a good view of the SuezCanal, about which so much has been said and done. For milds we wentthrough the Valley of the Nile, that great wet nurse of Egypt. Thebanks on either side on't stand dressed in livin' green. There wuz agood many American and English people at the tarven in Cairo, but noone we knew. In the garden at the side of the tarven wuz a ostrich penwhere a number of great ostriches wuz kep', and also several pelicanswalked round in another part of the garden. Tommy and I stood by the winder, very much interested in watchin' theostriches, and though I hain't covetous or proud, yet I did wish I hadone or two of them satiny, curly feathers to trim my best bunnet inJonesville, they went so fur ahead of any sisters in the meetin'house. Josiah hadn't see 'em yet; he wuz layin' on the lounge, but he sez: "Idon't see why you're so took up with them geese. " "Geese!" sez I; "look here, Josiah Allen"--and I took a cookie I hadgot for Tommy--"see here; see me feed these geese ten feet from theground. " He could see their heads come up to take it out of my hand. "Good land!" sez he, "you don't say they stretch their necks clear uphere. " And he jined in our astonishment then and proposed that heshould be let down from the winder in a sheet and git me a fewfeathers. But I rejected the idee to once. I sez: "I'd ruther gofeatherless for life than to have a pardner commit rapine for 'em. " And he sez: "If some Egyptian come to Jonesville and wanted arooster's tail feather, we wouldn't say nuthin' aginst it. " But I sez: "This is different; this would spile the looks of theostriches. " And he said there wuz sunthin' said in the Bible about "spilin' theEgyptians. " But I wouldn't let him wrest the Scripters to his owndestruction, and told him I wouldn't, and then sez I, "I never couldenjoy religion settin' under a stolen feather. " As you pass through these picturesque streets memories of them thathave made this city historic crowd upon your mind. You think ofSaladin, Christian, Mameluke and Islamite. You think of the Bible and you think of the "Arabian Nights, " and youalmost expect to see the enchanted carpet layin' round somewhere, andsome one goin' up to the close shet doors sayin', "Open sesame. " And as you stroll along you will hear every language under the sun, orso it seems, and meet English, Italian, French, Bedowins, soldiers, footmen, Turks, Arabs, all dressed in their native costumes. Anonclose shet up carriages in which you most know there are beautifulwimmen peerin' out of some little corner onbeknown to their folks;agin you meet a weddin' procession, then a trolley car, then someEgyptian troops, then some merchants, then mysterious lookin' Orientalwimmen, with black veils hangin' loose, then a woman with a donkeyloaded with fowls, then some more soldiers in handsome uniform. Agin every eye is turned to see some high official or native princedressed in splendid array dashin' along in a carriage with footmenrunnin' on before to clear the way. And mebby right after comes a mandrivin' a flock of turkeys, they feelin' jest as important andhigh-headed to all appearance. The air is delightful here, dry and warm. No malaria in Egypt, thoughnigh by are sulphur baths for anybody that wants them, and also a curefor consumptive folks. In goin' through the streets of Cairo you will see bazars everywhere;slipper bazars, carpet and rug, vase and candle, and jewelry bazars;little shops where everything can be bought are all on sides of you. But if you go to buy anything you get so confused as to the differentworth of a piaster that your head turns. In some transactions it is asmuch agin as in others. Josiah got dretful worked up tryin' to buy asilk handkerchief. Sez he to the dealer: "What do you mean by it, you dishonest tike, you? If you should cometo Jonesville to buy a overcoat or a pair of boots, and we shouldwiggle round and act as you do, I wouldn't blame you if you never comethere to trade a cent with us agin. " The man kep' bowin' real polite and offered some coffee to him and apipe, and Josiah sez: "I don't want none of your coffee, nor none of your pipes, I wanthonesty, and I can tell you one thing that you've lost my trade, andyou'll lose the hull of the Jonesville trade when I go home and tellthe brethren how slippery you be in a bargain. " The man kep' on bowin' and smilin' and I told Josiah, "I presoomhe thinks you're praisin' him; he acts as if he did. " And Josiahstopped talkin' in a minute. But howsumever he wouldn't take thehandkerchief. Miss Meechim and I--and I spoze that Robert Strong wuz to the bottomof it--but 'tennyrate, we wuz invited to a harem to see a princess, wife of a pasha. Robert thought that we should like to see the insideof an Indian prince's palace, and so we did. Miss Meechim of course woudn't consent to let Dorothy go anywhere nighsuch a place, and I guess she disinfected her clothes before she seeDorothy when she got back; 'tennyrate, I see her winder up and herdress hangin' over a chair. Arvilly didn't want to go, and as shewuzn't invited, it made it real convenient for her to not want to. Andof course I couldn't take my pardner. Why, that good, moral man wouldbe flowed from by them wimmen as if he had the plague. Dorothy andRobert wuz a-goin' to Heliopolis and offered to take Tommy with 'em. And Miss Meechim and I accordin'ly sot off alone. The palace stood in beautiful grounds and is a noble-lookin' building. We wuz met at the entrance to the garden by four handsome native girlswith beautiful silk dresses on, handsome turbans, satin slippers andjewelry enough for a dozen wimmen. They took our hands, each on us walkin' between two on 'em, for allthe world as if we wuz prisoners, till we got to the gates of thepalace, and here two black males, dressed as rich as a president orminister, met us, and four more gayly dressed female slaves. These girls took Miss Meechim's cape and my mantilly and laid 'emaway. Then we went through a long hall and up a magnificent marblestaircase, with a girl on each side on us agin jest as if we wuz bein'took to jail. We then went into a large beautiful room where thePrincess' Lady of Honor wuz tryin', I spoze, to be jest as honorableas she could be. But to my surprise she handed us the first thing somecoffee and pipes to smoke. But such a pipe never entered Jonesville. Why, the pipe stem was six feet long, amber and gold, diamonds andrubies. Good land! it wuz most enough to get a perfessor and a memberof the W. C. T. U. To smokin'. But I wuzn't to be enticed; I sort o'waved it off graceful and drinked a little coffee, which wuz good, andif you'll believe it the little holders that held our cups wuz allcovered with diamonds. Then six more slaves, jest as pretty, with jestas fine clothes and with as many jewels, came to tell us the Princesswould see us. And we went with them through room after room, each oneseemin'ly more elegant than the others, till we reached the door of agreat grand apartment, and here the Princess wuz surrounded by moreslaves, dressed handsomer than any we'd seen yet. She come forward to meet us and led the way to a beautiful divan, where we sot down. Here they offered us some more of the beautifuljewelled pipes agin, and agin I stood firm and so did Miss Meechim, but the Princess smoked a little. But the tobacco wuz perfumed sodelightfully that there wuz no tobacco smell to it. Then coffee wuz passed agin in a jewelled cup and agin I sipped alittle on't, thinkin' like as not it would keep me awake it wuz sostrong, but knowin' that I had got to be polite anyway in such a timeas this. She talked quite good English and we had a pleasant visit with her, and anon she took each on us by the hand--for all the world theyacted as if we wuz infants and couldn't walk alone--and led us throughthe magnificent rooms with lofty mirrors, furniture covered withcostly Persian cloth embroidered with gold and silver, great rugs ofthe most exquisite color and texture, mounds of flowers, baskets andvases everywhere running over with them, makin' the air sweet withtheir perfume. In one room there wuz no winders, the walls bein' made of glitterin'mirrors sot in gilded frames, light comin' down through stained glassin the gilded ceiling. On the Princess' toilet table wuz a large gold tray holdin' a basin ofperfumed water, and white silk towels embroidered in gold and silver. I remembered my crash and huck-a-buck towels and thought to myself Ididn't know what she would do if she ever come to see me, unless Itook one of Josiah's silk handkerchiefs for her to wipe her hands on. But concluded I would do that if she ever paid my visit. And I thoughtthe minute I got home I would paint the bowl of the pipe we had usedfor tizik, a pale blue or pink, and dry some extra fine mullen leavesand catnip blows, they smell real sweet to me, and I knew they wouldbe good for her bronkial tubes anyway. And I laid out to make up in awarm welcome what we lacked in luxury. Well, the last room we went into we wuz served in tiny cups with adelicate drink. Lemonade, I guess it wuz, or orange and fruit juice ofsome kind. It wuz served to us in jewelled cups and we had goldembroidered napkins. Here the Princess thanked us for our visit andretired, followed by the slaves who had gone with us through thepalace. And we went down the staircase with a girl on each side on us jest aswe went up, so if Miss Meechim and I had had any mind to break awayand act, we couldn't, and went to our carriage waited on jest as whenwe come. Miss Meechim said as we started back: "Did you ever see the like? Was you prepared to see such magnificence, Josiah Allen's wife?" And I told her I wuz partly prepared, for I had read the ArabianNight's Entertainment. "Well, " sez she, "it goes fur beyend my wildest dreams of luxury. " When we got back to the tarven we found that Robert Strong had beendelayed by a visitor and wuz jest startin' for Heliopolis, and MissMeechim and I bein' all ready we turned round and went with 'em. Heliopolis hain't so grand lookin' as its name. It is a little Arabtown six miles from Cairo. The low houses are made of mud and nastyinside, I believe; they don't look much like Jonesville houses. Theoldest and greatest college once stood here. Here, too, wuz the hantof that immortal bird, the Phenix, who raised himself to life everyfive hundred years. (Josiah don't believe a word on't, and I don'tknow as I do. ) But we do spoze that wuz the very place where Josephmarried the daughter of Mr. Potiphar, doin' dretful well, it wuzspozed by her folks, but he wuz plenty good enough for her, I think, and so Josiah duz. And right in this neighborhood Alexander the Great marched round andcamped on his way to Memphis. So you can see it wuz interestin' in agood many ways. But the Virgin's Tree wuz what we wanted to see. It is a fig sycamore;its trunk is twenty feet in diameter and its branches spread out andcover a great space. But its size wuzn't what we went to see. Underthis tree Joseph and Mary rested whilst they wuz fleeing to Egypt fromthem that sought the young Child's life. Our Lord himself had beenunder this very tree that wuz bendin' over me. My emotions wuz suchthat I didn't want any on 'em to see my face; I went apart from 'emand sot down on a little seat not fur off from the fence that protectsthis tree from relic hunters. And I had a large number of emotions asI sot there lookin' up into the green branches. I wondered how Mary felt as she sot there. She knowed she wuz carryin'a sacred burden on her bosom. The Star that had guided the wise men tothe cradle of her Baby had shone full into his face and she'd seen theDivinity there. Angels had heralded His birth; the frightened kinglooked upon Him as one who would take his kingdom from him, and anangel had bidden them to take the Child and flee to Egypt. And how happy Joseph and Mary wuz as they sot down under this tree. All their journey over the weary rocky roads, over the mountains, through the streams and the valleys, and over the sandy desert theydassent rest, but wuz lookin' behind 'em all the time as they pressedforward, expectin' to hear the gallopin' steeds of the king, and tohear the cruel cries of his blood-thirsty soldiers. Why, just thinkon't: every other baby boy in the country put to death jest to be sureof makin' way with the child that she held to her bosom. How would anymother have felt; how would any mother's heart beat and soul faintwithin 'em as they plodded away on a donkey, knowin' that the swiftesthorses of the king wuz mebby follerin' clost behind? But it wuz allpast now; under the shade of this noble old tree Mary sot down, happiness in her tired eyes, ontold relief in the weary heart on whichthe Child leaned. I believe they laid down there under the starry heavens and went tosleep; mebby the Star shone down on 'em as they slep', seein' they wuzsafe now and Herod couldn't touch 'em even if he wuz clost to 'em. Egypt, blessed be thy turf and thy skies forever more, since thou hastsheltered the Lord! And while back in Jerusalem the blood-thirsty soldiers wuz rushin' toand fro seekin' for the young Child that they might destroy him, andin his palace King Herod lay in troubled sleep under the close-drawncurtains of the royal couch, slaves watchin' outside the room, slaveswatchin' his fearful thorn-strewn pillow, the little Child that hefeared and sought to destroy, slept with the clear midnight skybendin' over his sweet slumber, its matchless blue curtain looped upwith stars, hung with the great silver night lamp of the crescentmoon. His bed-chamber the broad plains and mountains and valleys ofthe world Which should yet own his peaceful sway. His guard theshining angels that had flown down to herald His coming on the fieldsof Bethlehem. Sleep well, little Child, with thy kingdom outstretchedabout thee, the hull grief-smitten world, upon which thou wast to laythy hands and heal its woes and wounds. The divine clothin' itself inthe sad garments of humanity that it might lift it up into heavenlyheights. Well, we stayed there quite a spell. Robert, I could see, felt a gooddeal as I did and so did Dorothy; I read in her sweet eyes the tenderlight that meant many things. But Miss Meechim had doubts about thetree. She looked all round it, and felt of the low, droopin' branchesand looked clost at the bark. She is a great case for the bark ofthings, Miss Meechim is, you know some be. They will set theirmicroscopes on a little mite of bark and argy for hours about it, butdon't think of the life that is goin' on underneath. The divinevitality of truth that animates the hidden soul of things. They thinkmore of the creeds, the outward husks of things than the inside lifeand truth. Miss Meechim said with her eye still on the bark that notree could live two centuries and still look so vigorous. But I sez, "Mount Sinai looks pretty firm and stiddy, and the Red SeaI spoze looks jest about as red and hearty as it did when theIsraelites crossed it. " She wuz examinin' the bark through her eye glasses, but she saidmountains and seas could stand more than a tree And I said I guessedthe hand that made a tree could keep it alive. And I knew that it didn't make any difference anyway. This wuz theroad they come and they had to rest anyway, and it stood to reasonthey would rest under a tree, and I felt that this wuz the tree, though it might have been another one nigh by. And while MissMeechim's mind was all taken up lookin' at the bark of that tree, mymind wuz full of this great fact and truth, that the Child wuz savedfrom his enemies. And while the kingdom of the wicked king has beencovered and lost from sight under the sands of time for centuries, thekingdom of the Holy Child stands firmer to-day than ever before, andis broadening and widening all the time, teaching the true brotherhoodof man, and fatherhood of God. This is the great truth, all thebranching creeds and arguments and isms, they are only the bark. Nigh by the tree stands a tall piller sixty-four feet high, coveredwith strange writin'. As I looked at it I thought I would gin a dollarbill to have read that writin', no knowin' what strange secrets of thepast would have been revealed to me. But I couldn't read it, it isdretful writin'. Josiah sometimes makes fun of my handwritin' andcalls it ducks' tracks, but I thought that if he'd seen this he'dthought that mine wuz like print compared to it. They say that this isthe oldest obelisk in Egypt, and that is sayin' a good deal, for Egyptis full of former greatness old as the hills. Here in the East civilization begun, and gradual, gradual it stalkedalong towards the West, and is slowly, slowly marchin' on round theworld back to where it started from, and when the round world isbelted with knowledge and Christianity, then mebby will come thethousand years of peace, the millennium the Scriptures have foretold, when the lamb shall lay down with the lion and a young child shalllead them. I spoze the young child means the baby Peace that shallbime-by lead the nations along into the World Beautiful. And thereshall be no more war. CHAPTER XXIII Cairo is different from any other city under the sun, and after you'vebeen there when you shet you eyes and see it agin in memory, thebrilliant colorin' sheds its picturesque glow over the brilliant seen. The deep bright blue of the sky, the splendor of the sunlight, thedazzlin' white of the buildings, the soft mellow brown of the desertand the green of the tropical foliage always comes back to brightenthe panorama. And the crowds of people from all parts of the world, each dressed inhis and her natural costume, every style of dress and every colorunder the sun. And the milds of bazars, little booths about ten feetsquare but all runnin' over with the richest embroideries, silkenfabrics, gold, silver, amber and everything else gorgeous. Then thereis the new part of Cairo, the broad, long streets lined withmagnificent buildin's. The great Citadel of Cairo and the AlabasterMosque up on a rocky height, six hundred feet above the city. TheCitadel wuz built by Saladin in 1100, most a thousand years ago. Whereis Mr. Saladin and his folks? and his dynasty? All forgot centuriesago, but the work he thought out is here still. The Mosque is the onlybuilding' in the world built of alabaster; it wuz begun by MehemetAli, the great-grandfather of the Khedive. The alabaster looks likesatin, amber and white color, mebby some of my readers have got alittle alabaster box or figger that they set store by, it is so costlyand fine. Then think of a hull buildin' three hundred feet squarebuilt of it. The ruff is uplifted by alabaster columns; the alabastergalleries are a hundred feet above the floor. The gilded dome can beseen twenty or thirty milds away. The view from the terrace in frontis so beautiful that you don't want to leave it. The city lies beforeyou and a long view of the Nile, rich gardens, green fields, toweringpalms, the pyramids standin' like ghosts out of the past, Memphis, oldest city of the world. Turn your head and there is the land ofGoshen; how many times amidst the overwhelmin' cares of a Jonesvillekitchen have we mentioned "Land of Goshen, " but solemn now to look atand contemplate as the home of the patriarchs. Only two milds off downthe Nile is the spot where Napoleon fought with the Mamelukes and wonthe Battle of the Pyramids. And jest under you as you look down, yousee the ruff of the Egyptian Museum where the body of Ramesis lays, once rulin' with a high hand he and his folks, as many as a dozen of'em, over all the land our stranger eyes looked down on. But nowthey're nothin' but a side show, as you may say in a museum. Josiah wuz dretful took with the sights of shops on either side of thenarrow streets of old Cairo and all sorts of trades bein' carried onthere right out doors: goldsmiths and silversmiths makin' theirjewelry right there before you, and Josiah sez: "I lay out to have ashop rigged out doors to hum and make brooms and feather dusters; andwhy don't you, Samantha; how uneek it would be for you to have yoursewin'-machine or your quiltin'-frames in the corner of the fencebetween us and old Bobbett's, and have a bedquilt or a crazy blanketdraped behind you on the fence. You could have a kind of a turban ifyou wanted to; I would lend you one of my bandannas. I'm goin' to wear'em in my bazar when I rig one up, and my dressin'-gown, and I shallhave Ury wear one and sandals. I can make some crackin' good sandalsfor us all out of shingles, and lace 'em on with colored ribbins. Howdressy they will make me look. I shall lace my sandals on with yellerand red baby ribbin, them colors are so becomin' and make mycomplexion look fairer. We shall jest coin money out of my bazar, andI shall write to Ury to put in a piece of broom corn, and mebby weshall make jewelry; we could make some good mournin' jewelry out ofcoal and lam-black. " Well, I didn't argy with him, thinkin' most probable that he'd forgitit, but Arvilly, who wuz with us, sez: "I guess it would be mournin'jewelry in good earnest if you made it; I guess it would make anybodymourn to see it, let alone wearin' it. " "Wait till you see it, " sez he. And she sez, "I am perfectly willin' to wait. " "But I shan't set on the floor as they do here, " sez he, "I am sorryfor some of them poor old men that can't afford chairs, and I would beperfectly willin' to make 'em some stools if they'd furnish thelumber. " Sez I, "It's their way, Josiah, they like it. " "I don't believe it, " sez he; "nobody loves to scrooch down flat withtheir legs under 'em numb as sticks. " But right whilst we were talkin'we met a funeral procession. The head one had hard work to git throughthe crowd crying out: "There is no deity but God! Mohammed is his apostle!" Then come someboys singin' a funeral him; and then the bier, borne by friends of thecorpse and covered by a handsome shawl. Then come the hiredmourners--wimmen--for I spoze they think they're used to mournin' andcan earn their money better. 'Tennyrate, these screeched and wailedand tore their hair and beat their breast-bone as if they meant toearn their money. Then come the relatives and friends. Of course, theyno need to have wep' a tear, havin' hired it done. But they did seemto feel real bad, they couldn't have wept and wailed any more if theyhad been hired to. Josiah sez: "Samantha, when I'm took, if you hire anybody to mourn get some betterlookin' females than these. I had almost ruther die onlamented than tohave such lookin' creeters weepin' over my remains; now some fairlookin' females such as sister Celestine Bobbett and she that wuzSubmit Tewksbury----" But I interrupted him by telling him truly that no hired tears wouldfall on his beloved face if I outlived him, and no boughten groanswould be hearn. Sez I, "The tears of true love and grief would bedewyour forward. " "Well, " sez he, "it would be my wishes. " As we wended our way along we met several water-carriers with leatherbottles, jest such a one as Hagar took with her and Ishmael out in thedesert, and it wuz on this same desert whose sands wuz siftin' inabout us every chance it had that she lay the child down to die andangels come and fed him. And, also, it bein' along towards night wemet several shepherds; one wuz carryin' a tired lamb in his arms. Theywuz patriarkal in appearance and dressed jest like the Bible pictures. I felt as though I had met Abraham or Isaac onbeknown to them. Another sight that impressed my pardner fearfully wuz the howlin'dervishes--we'd hearn about 'em a sight, and so we thought we would goand hear 'em howl. By payin' a little backsheesh (which is money) wegot permission to attend one of their religious meetin's. There wuz achief or Sheik, which Josiah always called a "shack"--and I d'no buthe wuz well named--and about twenty or thirty howlers in long whiterobes. They made a low bow to the Shack and then knelt round him in acircle; then they bowed agin a number of times clear to the floor andbegun to sing or pray. I d'no what you would call it, but the axentswuz dretful and the music that accompanied it harrowin' in theextreme. Then they got up and bowed agin to the Shack and begun toshake their heads and their arms and their feet rapid and voylent, allkeepin' time to the music, or what I spoze they called music, theirhair hangin' loose, their yellin' fearful, and then they begun towhirl like a top spinnin' round, faster and faster, whirlin' andhowlin' and shriekin' till they couldn't howl or whirl any longer. Then the meetin' broke up as you may say, they formed a half circleagin round the Shack, bowed to the ground before him and fell downperfectly wore out on the floor. I should have thought they'd died. Why, I couldn't have stood it and lived nor Josiah couldn't; it wuzall we could stand to see it go on. One day Miss Meechim and I visited an American Mission School for Araband Egyptian children, and it wuz from one of these very schools thatone of the Rajahs or native princes took his wife. She wuz a littledonkey driver, and the teacher of the Mission, liking her and pityingher, got permission of her mother (a poor donkey driver of Cairoliving in a mud hut) to take the child into her school. When she wuzabout fourteen years old the Rajah, who had accepted the Christianreligion, visited this school, and the little girl wuz teaching aclass of barefooted Egyptian girls, sittin' on the floor about her. Who can tell the mysteries of love? Like lightning it strikes where itwill and must. Why should this Prince, educated in England, a friendof Queen Victoria, who had seen beautiful women all his days onmoved, why should he fall in love with this little girl, late a donkey driverin the streets of Cairo? I d'no, but so it wuz, and he told the lady in charge of the schoolthat he wanted to make her his wife. She wuz greatly surprised, andnot knowin' he wuz what he said he wuz, asked him polite to go awayand select some other bride. But the next day he come back, sent inhis card and a autograph letter from Queen Victoria, and aginexpressed his desire to marry the bright-eyed little Egyptian. When the subject wuz broached to her she wep' and pleaded not to besold into slavery, spozin' that wuz what it meant. But the Prince madeher understand that he wanted her for his wife, and she consented tobe educated in a fitting manner, and at last the weddin' took place atthe home of the teacher. The Prince took his wife to London, where she wuz presented at Court, and makes him a good wife, so fur as I know, and they say she'sdretful good to the poor; 'tennyrate the Prince must think a good dealof her, for he presented every year one thousand pounds to help on theschool where he found his Princess. This story is true and is strangerthan most lies. I spoze that from that time on all the dark-eyed little Egyptian maidsin that school wuz lookin' out anxiously to see some prince comin' inand claim 'em and make a royal princess of 'em. But one swallow don'tmake a spring; I don't spoze there has been or will be agin such aromance. Josiah said that we must not leave Cairo without seein' Pharo. Josiahsaid he felt real well acquainted with him, havin' read about him somuch. Sez he, "He wuz a mean creeter as ever trod shoe-leather and I'dlove to tell him so. " They keep him in the Museum of Cairo now, a purpose, I spoze, to scarefolks from doin' what he did, for a humblier lookin' creeter I neversee, and hard lookin'; I don't wonder a mite at the bad things I'vehearn tell on him; why, a man that looked like that wuz sure to bemean as pusley. He looked as if he wuz bein' plagued now with everysingle plague that fell on him for his cruelty and I d'no but he is. Iwonder that the Israelites got along with him so long as they did;Josiah wouldn't have stood it a week, he's that quick-tempered anddespises the idee of bein' bossed round, and how Pharo did drive thempoor children of Israel round; ground 'em right down to his terms, wouldn't let 'em say their soul wuz their own, worked 'em most todeath, half starved 'em, wouldn't give 'em any rights, not a singleright. But as I sez to Josiah, he got his come-up-ance for hisheartless cruelty, he got plagued enough and drownded in the bargain. He's a mummy now. Yes, as Josiah sez when he looked on him: "You've got to be mum now, no givin' orders to your poor overworkedhired help in your brick-fields, not lettin' 'em have even a strawthat they begged for to lighten their burden. The descendants of themfolks you driv round can stand here and poke fun at you all day andyou've got to keep your mouth shet. Yes, " sez he, "you've got to aplace now where you can't be yellin' out your orders, you've got to bemum, for you're a mummy. " I didn't love to have Josiah stand and sass Pharo right to his face, but it seemed so gratifyin' to him I hated to break it up, and I felttowards him jest as he did, and Arvilly and Miss Meechim felt jest aswe did about it; they loathed his looks, hatin' what he'd done so bad. But I thought from what I hearn Robert Strong sayin' to Dorothy thathe had doubts about his being the real Bible Pharo, there wuz quite alot of them kings by the same name, you know. But Miss Meechim hearnhim and assured him that this was the very Pharo who so cruellytortured the Israelites and who was drownded by the Lord for hiscruelty, she knew it by her feelings. And she said she was so gladthat she had seen for herself the great truth that the Pharo spirit ofinjustice and cruelty wuz crushed forever. But Robert said that Pharo's cruelty sprang from unlimited power andfrom havin' absolute control over a weaker and helpless class; he saidthat would arouse the Pharo spirit in any man. That spirit, he said, was creeping into our American nation, the great Trusts and Monopoliesformed for the enrichment of the few and the poverty of the many; whatare they but the Pharo spirit of personal luxury and greed anddominion over the poor? I knew he was thinkin' of his City of Justice, where every man had theopportunity to work and the just reward of his labor, where Charity (agood creeter Charity is too) stayed in the background, not bein'needed here, and Justice walked in her place. Where Justice and Laborwalked hand in hand into ways of pleasantness and paths of peace. Hedidn't say nothin' about his own doin's, it wuzn't his way, but Ihearn him say to Dorothy: "The Voice is speaking now to America as it did to Egypt, Let mypeople go, out of their helpless bondage and poverty into better, morejust and humane ways, but America doesn't listen. The rich stand onthe piled up pyramid of the poor, Capital enslaves Labor and drives itwith the iron bit of remorseless power and the sharp spur of Necessitywhere it will. But there must be a day of reckoning; the Voice will beheard, if not in peace with the sword: 'For the few shall not forever sway The many toil in sorrow, We'll sow the golden grain to-day, The harvest comes to-morrow. '" But the greatest sight in Cairo and mebby the hull world is thePyramaids. I d'no as I had so many emotions in the same length of time durin' myhull tower as I did lookin' at them immense structures. It don't seemas if they wuz made by man; they seem more like mountains placed thereby the same hand that made the everlastin' hills. They say that ittook three hundred thousand men twenty years to build the biggest one. And I don't doubt it. If I had been asked to draw up specifications Iwouldn't have took the job for a day's work less. Why, they say ittook ten years to build the road over which them stuns wuz broughtfrom the Nile, and good land! how did they ever do it? No hands nor nomachinery that we know anything about at the present day could moveone of them stuns, let alone bringin' 'em from heaven knows where. They couldn't have been got into any boat, and how did they do it? Id'no nor Josiah don't. Mebby the sphynx knows, most probable she duz, but she's a female that don't git herself into trouble talkin' andgossipin'. Lots of wimmen would do well to foller her example. From the first minute we got to Cairo and long enough before that wehad lotted on seein' the Pyramaids, Josiah had talked about 'em asight, and told me time and agin that he did want to see the spink, hehad got to see the spink. Sez I, "You mean the Sphynx, Josiah. " "Yes, " sez he, "the spink; I'm bound to see that. I want to tellDeacon Henzy and Brother Bobbett about it; they crowed over me quite alittle after they went to Loontown to see them views of the spink andthe Pyramaid of Chops. You know I wuz bed-sick at the time with acrick in my back. I guess they'll have to quirl down a little when Itell 'em I've walked round the spink and seen old Chops with my owneyes. " Well, I know lots of folks travel with no higher aim than to telltheir exploits, so I didn't argy with him. And the hull party of ussot off one pleasant day to view them wonders; they're only six milesfrom Cairo. The Pyramaid of Cheops is higher than any structure inEurope; the Strassburg Cathedral is the highest--that is four hundredand sixty feet, and Cheops is four hundred and eighty feet high. Eachof its sides is seven hundred and sixty feet long above the sand, andI d'no how much bigger it is underneath. The wild winds from thedesert piles up that sand everywhere it can; it was blowin' aginstthat pyramaid three or four thousand years before Christ wuz born, andhas kep' at it ever sense; so it must have heaped up piles about it. The pyramaid is made of immense blocks of stun, and I hearn Josiahexplainin' it out to Tommy. Sez he, "It is called Chops because thestun is chopped off kinder square. " But I interrupted and sez, "Josiah Allen, this wuz named after Cheops, one of the kings of Egypt; some say it wuz his tomb. " Miss Meechim sez, "They say it took three hundred thousand men twentyyears to build it, " and she remarked further, "How many days' workthis king did give to the poor, and how good it wuz in him!" AndRobert Strong said: "Their work has lasted while the king is forgotten; labor againstcapital, labor ahead. " Dorothy looked dreamily up onto the immense pile and said nothin'. Arvilly said if she had a long whitewash brush she would advertise herbook, the "Twin Crimes, " by paintin' a drunken man in a hovel beatin'his wife and children, whilst America wuz furnishin' him with theclubs, and the "Wild and Warlike Deeds of Men" in different wild andwarlike attitudes. And little Tommy wonnered if he could climb up on it and wonnered whatanybody could see from the top. And I looked on it and felt as if I could almost see the march of thecenturies defile by its stubborn old sides, and I wondered like Tommywhat one could look off and see from the top, gazing out acrost ourcenturies so full of wonders and inventions, into the glowin'mysteries of the twentieth century. Robert Strong said that some thought it wuz built for astronomicalpurposes, for there is a passage down three hundred and twenty feetfrom the bed rock from which you can view the sky. "And some think, " sez Dorothy, "it wuz built to measure distancescorrectly, it stands true east, north, south, west. " And Miss Meechim sez, "I believe it wuz built for religious purposes:the interior passages have many stones and symbols that are a mysteryto every one unless it is explained in this way. " Sez Arvilly, "I believe it wuz made to shet up folks in that got drunkand acted. Probable there wuz some even in that fur-off time that madefools of themselves jest as they do now, and old Chops built it toshet 'em up in, and mebby he wuz shet up in it, too; mebby he took todrinkin'. I wish I could have sold him the 'Twin Crimes'; it wouldhave helped him a sight, but I wuzn't born soon enough, " sez she, sithin'. Tommy stood back a little, lookin' up and seein' some people half-wayto the top, lookin' like flies on the side of the meetin' house, said: "I wonner, oh, I wonner who made it and what it wuz made for, and oh, how I do wonner how they ever got them big stones to the top. " And I sez to myself, "the child is wiser than any of us. He don't tryto measure his weak surmises on them great rocks and problems, butjest wonders at it all, " and I thought I would foller his example, andI felt considerable better after I gin up. Robert Strong and Dorothy and Arvilly clumb clear to the top, helpedby Arab lifters and boosters. Arvilly and Dorothy wuz tuckered whenthey come down and they both said they wouldn't have undertook it ifthey had known what a job it wuz, but they said the view from the topwuz wonderful, wonderful! and I spoze it wuz, but I thought I wouldruther hear 'em tell on't than to go through what they did gettin' upand down, and Miss Meechim, I guess, felt so too. The other two pyramaids in this group wuz smaller than Cheops andstood not fur away. The Sphynx stands about a quarter of a mild off, lookin' off towards the east, facin' the risin' sun. I wonder if sheexpects the sunrise of civilization to dawn ag'in into her sight. 'Tennyrate she seems to be lookin' out for sunthin'. There she has sot, meditatin' all these years. She wuz old, old as thehills when Christ wuz born. What hain't them old eyes seen if shesenses anything? From Cairo we went to Alexandria, where we made a short stay; wecouldn't stay long anyway, we had loitered so on the journey. Here itwuz June. Jerusalem and Bethlehem and Nazareth we must visit, andstill how could we hurry our footsteps in these sacred places that oursoul had so longed to see? Alexandria was considerable interestin' on several accounts; it wuzthe home of Cleopatra, and the home of Hypatia, the friend andteacher of women. A smart creeter Hypatia Theon wuz, handsome as apicter, modest, good appearin', and a good talker. 'Tennyrate therooms where she lectured on philosophy and how to git along in theworld wuz crowded with appreciative hearers, and I spoze Mr. Cyrel, who wuz preachin' there at the time, and didn't get nigh so many tohear him, wuz mad as a hen at her for drawin' away the head men andwimmen. 'Tennyrate she wuz killed and burnt up some time ago, a-goin'on two thousand years. Yes, they burnt up all they could of her; theycouldn't burn up her memory, nor liberty, nor the love of wimmin fortalkin', and her stiddy practice on't when she gits a chance, notbein' able to. But to resoom: The evenin' we got there Josiah looked out of our winder and see acamel kneelin' to take on its load, and sez Josiah: "If I could trainthe old mair to kneel down in front of the Jonesville meetin' housefor me to git onto her back, how uneek it would look. " Sez I coldly, "Then you lay out to go to meetin' horseback, do you?And where should I be?" "Oh, I might rent a camel for you from some circus; you know what bigloads camels can take on, they can carry a ton or more, and it couldcarry you all right. " I despise such talk, I don't weigh nigh so much as he makes out. But Josiah went on, "I d'no but a camel could carry both on us, Iwouldn't add much to the load, I don't weigh very hefty. " "No, " sez I, "you're not very hefty anyway. " But good land! I knew he couldn't rent any camel; circuses need 'emmore than we do. The next day we all went out to see Pompey's Piller which we had seentowerin' up before we landed, all on 'em ridin' donkeys but me, but Inot being much of a hand to ride on any critter's back, preferred togo in a chair with long poles on each side, carried by four Arabs. Pompey's Piller is most a hundred feet high. Cleopatra's Needles wuzbrought from Heliopolis. One is standing; the other, which lay for along time nearly embedded in the drifting sand, wuz given as a presentby Egypt to America, where it stands now in Central Park, New York. Tosee the mate to it here made us feel well acquainted with it andkinder neighborly. But we couldn't read the strange writin' on it tosave our life. Some say that they wuz raised by Cleopatra in honor ofthe birth of her son, Cæsarion. But I d'no if she laid out to writeabout it so's I could read it, she'd ort to write plainer; I couldn'tmake out a word on't nor Josiah couldn't. Cleopatra wuz dretful good lookin', I spoze, and a universal favoritewith the opposite sect. But I never approved of her actions, and Iwished as I stood there by that piller of hern that I could gin her areal good talkin' to. I would say to her: "Cleopatra, " sez I, "you little know what you're a-doin'. Mebby therewouldn't be so many Dakota and Chicago divorces in 1905 if it wuzn'tfor your cuttin' up and actin' in B. C. I'd say stealin' is stealin', and some wimmen think it is worse to steal their husbands away from'em than it would be to steal ten pounds of butter out of theirsuller. And that, mom, would shet any woman up in jail as you wellknow. And you know, Cleopatra, " sez I, "jest how you went on andbehaved, and your example is a-floatin' down the River of Time to-day, same as you sailed down the Sydnus in that barge of yourn. And to-dayyour descendants or influence posterity sail down the River of Time inpicture hats and feather boas, makin' up eyes and castin' languishin'glances towards poor unguarded men till they steal their hearts andsouls right out of their bodies; steal all the sweetness andbrightness out of some poor overworked woman's life, and if they don'ttake the body of their husband nothin' is said or done. Good land!what would I care for Josiah Allen's body if his love had been stole. I would tell the woman to take that in welcome sence she had all therest. But they sail along down the River of Life, coquettin' withweak, handsome male Antonys, who had better be to home with their ownlawful Octavias. So it goes. " I always hated Cleopatra's doin's. And Iwondered as I looked dreamily at that writin' of hern, if she wuzsorry for her actions now in that spear of hern, wherever it wuz, andwanted to ondo it. CHAPTER XXIV We stayed there for some time, and on our way home a dretful thinghappened to me. After we all got started, sunthin' happened to one ofthe poles of my chair, and with as much motionin' and jabberin' as apresidential election would call for, they at last got it fixed agin. By that time the party had all disappeared, and the bearers of myvehicle started off at their highest speed right acrost ploughed landand springin' crops and everything, not stoppin' for anything. Where wuz they takin' me? Wuz I to perish in these wilds? Wuz theycarryin' me off for booty? I had on my cameo pin and I trembled. Itwuz my pride in Jonesville; wuz I to lose my life for it? Or wuz it mygood looks that wuz ondoin' of me? Did they want to make me theirbrides? I sez to them in agonizin' axents, "Take me back instantly tomy pardner! He is the choice of my youth! I will never wed another!You hain't congenial to me anyway! It is vain for you to elope with mefor I will never be your brides!" But they jabbered and motioned and acted and paid no attention only torush along faster than ever. I then tried a new tact with 'em. With tremblin' fingers I onpinnedthe cameo pin, and with a noble jester that would have become Jepthaas he gin his only daughter for a sacrifice, I handed it out to 'em. And sez I, "If that is what you want, take it, and then bear me backsafely to my beloved pardner agin. " But they never touched it. They only jabbered away louder and morefierce like and yanked me along faster than ever. Oh, the agony of that time! Dear Josiah, should I never see thee agin?and the children and the grandchildren? Hills and dells of lovelyJonesville! Would they never dawn on my vision more! Would the oldmair never whinner joyfully at my appearance, or Snip bark a welcome? I thought of all the unfortunate Hebrew wimmen who would have beenneighbors to me then if I had been born soon enough. Ruth, Esther, Hagar, they all had suffered, they had all most likely looked off ontothe desert, even as I wuz lookin' for help, and it didn't come to someon 'em. And by this time to add to my sufferin's, the mantilly ofnight was descendin' over the seen, the tropical night that comes soswift, so fast, oh, what should I do? Every move I made, everydespairin' jester only seemed to make 'em go faster, so it wuz plainto be seen that my help wuz not in man. I thought of that pillar offire that had lighted that sad procession of Hebrews acrost that verydesert. And, like a cool, firm hand, laid on a feverish, restlessforetop, come agin the thought of them three wise men that had trodthat desert waste. No path, no guide to lead 'em, only the Star, and Isez in my inmost heart: "That Star hain't lost its light; it remains jest as bright and clearto-day as it did then to light true believers acrost the darkness inthe hour of their need. " And jest as plain as though they wuz spoke tome come these beautiful words: "I will lift up mine eyes to the hillsfrom whence cometh my help. " And I lifted my streamin' eyes accordin', for by this time I wuzcryin' and sheddin' tears. I could see by the faint light in the westthat there wuz considerable of a hill on the east of me, and as myweepin' eyes wuz lifted in that direction my heart almost stood stillas I beheld all of a sudden a glowin' star of light shine out of thedarkness right on the top of that hill and rapidly desend in mydirection nearer and nearer. Oh, joy! oh, bliss! it wuz my own pardner with a lantern. His devotedlove had bore him back. Settin' on a donkey bearin' a lantern, helooked to me like an angel. It wuz the star of love, indeed it wuz!the brightest star of earth come to light my dark pathway. And I bustout: "Oh, Josiah Allen! you are not one of the wise men, but you lookbetter to me than any of 'em could. " And he sez, "It don't look very pretty for you, after hangin' out tillthis time o' night, to run the one who has come way back after youwith a lantern, and talk about his not knowin' anything. " "Run you, Josiah, " sez I, "you look more beautiful to me than wordscan tell. " That mollified him and he sez with a modest smile, "I spoze I am verypretty lookin', but I worried about you a sight. " It seems that they had went on a pretty good jog, and seein' mybearers had got belated with me they had took a short cut acrost thefields to overtake 'em. But it was a eppisode not to be forgot, and Itold Josiah not to be separated away from me a minute after this. SezI, "I almost feel like purchasin' a rope and tyin' myself to you forthe rest of the tower. " Sez he, "That would make talk, Samantha, but I will keep my eye on youand not let you git carried off agin; for the feelin's I felt when Imissed you I would not go through agin for a dollar bill. " Well, we soon come up with the rest of the party. It seemed that theyhad been talkin' and havin' such a good time they hadn't missed me forquite a while. But when they did, Arvilly said Josiah acted some as hedid when she and he pursued me acrost the continent; sez she, "Heacted like a fool; I knew you couldn't be fur behind. " And I sez, "Arvilly, spiritual things are spiritually discerned; loveis spiritual and love has to interpret it. " "Well, " sez she, "I am glad he found you so soon, for, to tell thetruth, I wuz beginnin' to worry a little myself. " Miss Meechim said she thought I had gone into some shrine to worship. That was a great idee! off with four Arabs huntin' a shrine at thattime of night! The next day we started for Jerusalem by way of Joppa and Ismalia. Itwuz on a fair evenin', as the settin' sun made strange reflections onearthly things, we entered through the gate into Jerusalem, city ofour God. Nineteen centimes since, the Star moved along through theDecember night and stood over the lonely manger in Bethlehem where aBabe wuz born. The three wise men wuz the first visitors to thatChild. Now fifteen thousand visitors come yearly from every part ofthe world to look upon this sacred place where the Man of Sorrowslived his sorrowful life of good to all, suffered and died, and theheavenly King burst the bonds of the tomb and ascended into heaven. In these streets did sad-eyed prophets walk to and fro, carrying themessage of the coming of the King. They were stunned by thegain-sayin' world, jest as it stuns its prophets to-day, only withdifferent kinds of stuns mebby, but hard ones. Here they wuzafflicted, tormented, beaten, sawn asunder for uttering the truth asGod made it known to them, jest as they are to-day, of whom the worldwuz not worthy. Just like to-day. Here after centuries had gone by, the truth they had foretold become manifest in the flesh. Jest as itshall be. After hundreds of years had gone by, he whom the prophetshad foretold wuz born in Bethlehem, and the three wise men, fur apart, knowin' nothin' of each other, wuz warned of his birth and wuz told tofoller the Star. They obeyed the heavenly vision and met on thepathless desert, as the soul's and heart's desires of all good men andwimmen meet who follow the Star! Oh, sacred place! to be thus honored. What emotions I felt as my ownfeet trod these roads, my own eyes looked on these sacred places. The next morning after our arrival we went up to the Mount of Olives, and from a tower two hundred feet high looked down on Jerusalem. TheMount of Olives is a long, low ridge on the east of the city. TheGarden of Gethsemane is down on the foot of Olivet near the brookKedron. Here eight great olive trees much larger than the rest form asacred grove from whose melancholy shadows might well come thatagonizing cry to his disciples for human sympathy and love: "Could ye not watch with me one hour?" Here did Judas come over the brook Kedron with the hungry, cruel moband betray Him with a kiss. It wuz in this place that our Lord givethat glorious promise that lightens life and death: "After I be risen I will go before you. " Every leaf of the old olive trees seemed trembling and full ofmemories of that hour. To the west was the valley of Jehosiphet, beyend is the city of the King. Back of you is Bethany, the home ofthe friends of Jesus where he tasted sometimes the human sweets offriendship, in the home of Lazarus and his sisters, Mary and Martha. Abeautiful soul Mary wuz, and Martha, poor creeter! I've always beensorry for her, workin' away doin' the housework when she would muchrather, no doubt, set and listen as Mary did, but somebody had to becookin'. So she jest drouged round the house. You can see the Dead Sea and the river Jordan, where our Lord wuzbaptized and the Dove descended out of the gardens of heaven and liton him, whilst the voice of the father God spoke, "This is my belovedSon in whom I am well pleased. " Not far away from there is Jericho. On the southwest rises the Hill ofZion, one of the four hills on which Jerusalem stands. As I looked onit I spoke to my pardner almost onbeknown to me, "Oh, Josiah! howmany times we've sung together: 'The Hill of Zion yields a thousand sacred sweets, Before we reach the heavenly fields or walk the golden streets. ' "But, " sez I, "did you ever expect to set your mortal eyes on't?" Hewuz affected, I could see he wuz, though he tried to conceal it bynibblin' on some figs he had bought that mornin'. Miss Meechim wuz all carried away with the seen as the guide pintedout the different places. Robert Strong and Dorothy didn't seem towant to talk much, but their faces wuz writ over with characters ofrapt and reverential emotion. Arvilly for once seemed to forgit her canvassin' and her keen brighteyes wuz softened into deep thought and feeling. Tommy, who had heardus talkin' about Herod walling in that part of the city, wonnered howany man could be so wicked as the cruel king who killed all the littlechildren, and he wonnered if there ever wuz another king in the hullworld so wicked. And my Josiah soothed his childish feelings by assuring him that allsuch wicked rulers wuz dead and buried ages ago. And so queer is Arvilly's mind since what she's went through that shespoke right up and told Tommy that there wuz lots of rulers to-dayjest as wicked and fur wickeder. Sez she, "There are plenty of men inevery city in America that get the right from the rulers of thecountry to destroy children in a much worse way than to cut theirheads off. " Sez she, "There are men who entice young children to smoke cigarettes, drugged on purpose to form a thirst for strong drink, then enticedinto drinking-dives, where goodness and innocence are murdered andevil passions planted and nursed into life, for the overthrowing ofall their goodness, for the murder of their family's safety andhappiness and making them the nation's menace and greatest danger. " And Tommy wonnered and wonnered what could make men do so, and so didI. And Arvilly sez, "What is cuttin' off the heads of twenty or thirtybabies compared to the thousands and thousands of murders that thislicensed evil causes every year?" Tommy's pretty face looked sad and he sez: "Why do good folks let itgo on?" And Arvilly sez, "Heaven knows--I don't. But I've cleared my skirts inthe matter. There won't be any innocent blood on my skirts at the lastday. " And Tommy bent his head and looked intently at the bottom of herdress; and I see my pardner furtively glance at the bottom of his ownpantaloons; he acted guilty. It is about two milds and a quarter round the city; the walls arethirty or forty feet high; there are thirty-four towers on the walls, and the city has eight gates. It has a population of one hundredthousand, more Jews than any other race; for according to theScripture, jest as the Jews wuz scattered to the four winds of heaven, they have of late been flocking home to Jerusalem jest as the oldprophets predicted exactly. During their hours of prayer, many Jews wear phylactrys bound to theirforwards and arms, and Robert Strong said he saw one nailed to adoorpost. It is a long, narrer case, shaped some like a thermometer, with around hole towards the top of it covered with a lid which they canlift up and see a few words of the ancient parchment inside, some asthe little boy had his prayer printed on the head-board, and on coldnights would pint to it, sayin', "O Lord, them's my sentiments. " But these Jews did it to carry out Moses' command to bind the words ofthe law for a sign on their arms, their heads and their doorposts. The writing on these phylactrys is so perfect that you can hardlybelieve that it is done with a pen. The Jews are extremely careful incopying the oracles of God. They still write copies of their OldTestament Scriptures, and every page must have jest so many lines, andjest the same number of words and letters. Robert Strong said that this was a great proof of the truth of theScriptures. Sez he: "Our Saviour said that one jot or tittle of thelaw shall not fail. " Tommy wanted to know what that meant, and Robert told him that "jot"wuz the smallest letter in the Hebrew alphabet, and "tittle" meant thelittle horn-shaped mark over some of the letters. And I sez: "I never knew what that meant before. " But Miss Meechimsaid she did--she always duz know everything from the beginning, specially after she's hearn some one explain it. But to resoom: Wewent to the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, where many differentreligious sects come to worship. The place where many think the bodyof our Lord wuz lain when he wuz taken down from the cross is coveredwith a slab worn down by the worshippers, and in the little chapelround it forty-three lamps are kep' burning night and day. But I felt more inclined to think that the place where the body of ourLord wuz lain wuz outside the city where the rocky hill forms astrange resemblance to a human skull, answering to the Bibledescription. Near there a tomb, long buried, has been found latelythat corresponds with the Bible record, which sez: "Now in the gardenwas a new tomb wherin no man had been lain. " There wuz places in thistomb for three bodies, but only one had been finished, and scientistssay that no body has ever crumbled into the dust that covers thistomb. Ruins show that ages back an arched temple once covered thisspot. But what matters the very spot where his body lay, or from wherehe ascended into the heavens. Mebby it can't be told for certain afterall these years; but we know that his weary feet trod these dustyroads. And as we travelled to Bethlehem and Bethany and Nazareth, hispresence seemed to go before us. It wuz a lovely morning when we left Jerusalem by the Jaffa gate andwent down acrost the valley of Hinnom, up acrost the hill of EvilCouncil, and acrost the broad plain where David fought many a battleand Solomon went about in all his glory. We stopped a few minutes at the convent of Mar Elias to see the fineview. From here you can see both places where the Saviour wuz born andwhere he died. It is a very sightly spot, and I hearn Josiah tellTommy: "This is a beautiful place, Tommy; it wuz named after Miss Elias; herchildren built it to honor their Mar; and it ort to make you think, Tommy, that you must always mind your Mar. " "Mar?" sez Tommy inquirin'ly, "Do you mean my mamma or my grandma?" I wuz glad the rest of the party wuz some distance away and didn'thear him. Josiah always jest crowds his explanations, full and runnin'over with morals, but he gits things wrong. I hated to hurt hisfeelin's, but I had to tell Tommy this wuz named, I spozed, from theprophet Elijah, who wuz, they say, helped by angels on this very spotas he flowed away from Jezabel; they gin him water and food, such goodfood that after eating it he could travel forty days and forty nightswithout eating agin. Jezabel wuzn't a likely woman at all; I wouldn't been willin' toneighbor with her. Rachel's tomb is a little furder on. It is a long, rough-lookin'structure with a round ruff on the highest end on't. Christian, Jewand Moslem all agree that this is Rachel's tomb. It wuz right herethat little Benoni wuz born and his ma named him while her soul wuzdeparting, for she died. I heard Josiah talkin' with Tommy about "little Ben. " I hated to havehim call him so, but didn't know as it would do much hurt this lateday. Right about here dwelt Ruth and Naomi. A sweet girl Ruth wuz; Ialways thought she wuz plenty good enough for Boaz, but then I d'nobut he wuz good enough for her. 'Tennyrate, her actions wuz a perfectpattern to daughter-in-laws. Here on these sands the giant, Goliath, strode out pompously to beslain by a stun from a sling sent by David when he wuz a shepherd boy. "How I wished I had some of them stuns to slay the evil giants of1900, " sez I. "If a stun could be aimed at Intemperance and another atthe big monopolies and destroy'em as dead as Goliath, what a boon itwould be. " And Arvilly sez, "Where will you git your sling, and where will yougit your Davids?" Sez I, "The ballot is a good sling that could kill'em both stun dead, but I d'no where I could git any Davids at present, " and she didn'tnor Josiah, but I felt in hopes that there would be one riz up, foralways when the occasion demands, the Lord sends the right man to fillthe place. Well, presently we arrov at Bethlehem (House of Bread). I mentionedits meaning, and Josiah sez: "I do hope I'll get some yeast risin' here that will taste a littlelike yourn, Samantha. " So little did he dwell on the divine meanin' that wuz thrillin' myheart. House of Bread, sacred spot from which proceeded the livingbread, that if any one should eat he should never more hunger. The Church of the Nativity, the place that we sought first in thevillage, is the oldest Christian church in the world. It wuz built byHelena, mother of Constantine, 330 A. D. It is owned by a good manydifferent sects who quarrel quite considerable over it, as they wouldbe likely to in Jonesville if our M. E. Church wuz owned too byBaptists and Piscopalians, etc. We spoze this church wuz built on the site of the tarven where ourLord wuz born. Goin' down the windin' staircase we come to the Grottoof the Nativity, which is a cave in the rock. There are several holychapels here, but this one where they say Christ wuz born is aboutthirty-eight feet long and ten or eleven feet wide, and covered insidewith costly carving and sculpture. A star in the floor shows the placewhere the manger wuz where the Holy Child wuz born, a silver starglitters above it and around the star sixteen lights are burning nightand day. All about here the caves in the rocks are used as stables, specially when the tarvens are full, as the Bible expressly statesthey wuz the night our Lord wuz born. 'Tennyrate, way back almost tothe time He wuz born, historians accepted this spot as the place ofHis birth. But as I said more formerly, what if it wuz not this veryspot, or some other nigh by, we know that it wuz in this little cityour Lord wuz born. It wuz of this city that centuries before theprophets said: "And thou, Bethlehem Ephratah, though thou be littleamongst the thousands of Judea, yet out of thee shall he come forththat shall be ruler of Israel, whose goings forth has been from oldeverlasting. " Then and there wuz founded on earth that invisible and spiritualkingdom so much stronger and mightier than any visible kingdom thatwuz ever thought on. The gorgeous throne of Herod and the long line ofkings and emperors since him have crumbled into dust, but that lowlycradle in the stable of Bethlehem is onmoved. The winds and storms ofeighteen hundred years have not been able to blow a straw away fromthat little bed where the Baby Christ lay. The crowns of kings andemperors have disappeared, covered by the dust of time, but the raysof light that shone round that Baby's brow grow brighter and brighteras the centuries sweep by. The deepest love, the strongest emotions ofthe hearts of an uncounted host keep that Bethlehem birthplace greenand changeless. The Herods, the Pilates, the Cæsars are dead andburied under the driftin' centuries, but our Lord's throne stands morefirm and powerful to-day than ever before. Hatred, malice, the crossof agony, the dark tomb could not touch that immortal life. Greatmonarch and tender, overturnin' and upbuildin' empires at will, blowing away cruel and unjust armies by a wave of his fingers, helpingthe poor slave bear his heavy burden by pouring love into his heart, wiping the widow's tears, soothing the baby's cries, marking even thesparrow's fall. Oh, what a kingdom! foretold by ages, begun on earth in that littlerocky stable that December night in Bethlehem. And it is secure; itcannot be moved, its white pillers are enthroned in the secretchambers of the soul. And how strong and changeless his prime ministers, Love, Justice andMercy, are, who carry his messages and do his will. How quiet andpeaceable and yet how strong, makin' no fuss and show; but whatmajesty is writ down on their forwards as they mirror the will oftheir Master. How firm they stand, jest as they've stood for ages; nowobblin', no turnin' this way and that to git adherents and followers. No, calm and mighty and holy they stand before that sacred throne jestas they did at Jerusalem before Herod and Pilate. Oh, how many emotions I did have as I stood in that sacred spot, twiceas many at least as I ever had in the same length of time in any otherplace. I didn't want to speak, I didn't want to see even my dearJosiah. No, I wanted to be silent, to think, to meditate, to pray "Thykingdom come. " Nigh by in the same grotto is what they call the tombof a relation of ourn on both sides. Yes, they say Adam, our grandpa(removed) wuz buried here. I felt considerable sceptical about that, but Josiah beheld it complacently, and I hearn him say to Tommy: "Yes, here Adam lays, poor creeter!" And sez Josiah, puttin' down hiscane kinder hard, "Oh, what a difference it would have made toJonesville and the world at large if Adam had put his foot right downjust as I put my cane to-day, and not let his pardner eat that apple, nor tease him into eatin' it, too. " And Tommy looked at him in wonder, "Did the apple make him sick, grandpa?" "Yes, Tommy, it made him sick as death, sin-sick, and he knowed itwould. " "Well, then what made him eat it, grandpa?" And Josiah said, "These things are too deep for you to understand now;when you git a little older grandpa will explain 'em all out to you. " And Arvilly sez, "I'd love to be there when you explained it, JosiahAllen. Layin' the blame onto the wimmen, jest as men do from Adam andAlpha to Omega. " Sez Josiah, "We'll walk out, Tommy, and see how it looks on theoutside. " But Arvilly kept mutterin' and kinder scoldin' about it long afterthey had departed. "Why didn't Adam take the apple away from her andthrow it away? He hankered after it jest as much as she did, that'swhy. Cowardly piece of bizness, layin' it all to her. " And she sniffed and stepped round sort o' nervous like, but sweetDorothy drawed her attention off onto sunthin' else. On the pleasant hills about the village shepards could be seen tendin'their flocks as they did on the night when the angels and themultitude of the heavenly hosts appeared to them bearing tidings ofgreat joy that that night a Saviour wuz born. "Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace, goodwill to men. " We felt that we must see Nazareth, where our Lord's early years wuzspent, and we set off on a pleasant day; we approached it from thenorth by way of Cana. The road wuz hard and rocky, but on turning acorner we see the little town like a city set on a hill, only this wuzon the side of the hill with hills above it and below it. Nazareth hasonly a few hundred houses, but they are white and clean looking, mostly square and flat roofed. As we drew nigh we see the tall minaretof a mosque, the great convent buildings and the neat houses of thevillage looking out of gardens of figs and olives with white dovesplaying about the roofs; there wuz great hedges of prickly pears andwhite orange blossoms and scarlet pomgranites to make it pleasant. On the road we wuz travelin' the child Jesus no doubt often passed inplay with other children or at work. I wonder how he felt as he stoodamongst his playmates and if a shadow of what wuz to come rested onhis young heart? I spoze so, for he wuz only twelve when he reasonedwith the wise doctors. There is one fountain that supplies the town and always has, and wesee stately dark-eyed wimmen carryin' tall jars of water on theirheads (how under the sun they ever do it is a mystery to me; I shouldspill every drop), but they seem to carry 'em easy enough. Childrenoften ran along at their sides. And I knew that in this place theyoung child Jesus must often have come with his mother after water. Stood right here where we stood! what emotions I had as I thoughton't. Dorothy and Robert looked reverently about them and dipped theirhands in the clear water just as Joseph and Mary might when they wuzyoung and couldn't look into the futer. Miss Meechim said she had a tract to home that dealt on this spot andwished she had brought it, she would have liked to read it here on thespot. Arvilly said she wuz glad enough to see that they had plenty of good, pure water here and didn't have to depend on anything stronger. And Josiah said in his opinion the water would make crackin' goodcoffee, and he wished he had a good cup and a dozen or so of mynut-cakes. CHAPTER XXV We visited a carpenter shop which wuz, I spoze, about like the shop ofJoseph, lots of different tools on shelves and nails on the side on't, some like Jonesville shops. But carpenter there has a different meaning from what it has inJonesville, it means different kinds of work, carving, makingfurniture, plows, shovels, as well as buildin' houses. In some such ashop as this our Lord worked with achin' back and blistered hands nodoubt, for He worked faithful and stiddy when He wuz subject to hisfather, Joseph. I suppose his dress wuz much like other Jewishpeasantry save in one thing he wore, and this wuz the seamlessgarment, suggestive, I spoze, of wholeness, holiness. As I thoughton't I instinctively murmured these words of our poet: "The healing of that seamless dress Is by our beds of pain, We feel it in life's care and stress-- And we are strong again. " I looked up to the brow of the hill whereon this city is built, and mymind wuz all wrought up thinkin' of how the Christ stood up in thesynagogue and told for the first time of his mission in theseincomparable words so dear to-day to all true ministers and lovers ofGod's words, and all earnest reformers from that day down: "The spirit of the Lord is upon me because he hath anointed meto preach the gospel to the poor. He hath sent me to heal thebroken-hearted, to preach deliverance to the captive, and recoveryof sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised. " Oh, what a divine mission! not to the great and lofty and happy, butto the poor, the broken-hearted, the bruised and the blind. How hisheart yearned over them even as it duz to-day. And how did the worldreceive it? Just as Truth is received to-day, anon or oftener; theythrust Him out of the synagogue, dragged Him to the brow of this veryhill that they might cast Him off. But we read that He passed throughthe midst of them and went his way, just as Truth will and must. Itcan't be slain by its opposers; though they may turn it out of theirhigh places by force, it will appear to 'em agin as an accuser. But oh, what feelin's I felt as I looked on that very hill, the veryground where He passed through their midst unharmed! I had a greatnumber of emotions, and I guess Josiah did, although his wuz softeneddown some and dissipated by hunger, and Tommy, dear little lamb! hetoo wuz hungry, so we all went to a little tarven where we got somefood, not over good, but better than nothin'. The roads all about Nazareth and Jerusalem are very stony and rocky, so we can see how hard it wuz, in a physical sense, for our Lord toperform the journeys He did, for they wuz almost always on foot. Well, that evenin' at the tarven in Jerusalem, Miss Meechim andDorothy and I wuz in the settin' room, and Dorothy set down to thelittle piano and played and sung some real sweet pieces, and severalof the English people who had come on the steamer with us gatheredround her to hear the music, and amongst them wuz two young gentlemenwe had got acquainted with--real bright, handsome young chaps theywuz--and they looked dretful admirin' at Dorothy, and I didn't wonderat it, for she looked as pretty as a new-blown rose, and her voice hadthe sweetness and freshness of a June mornin' in it, when the air isfull and runnin' over with the song of bird and bee, and the softmurmur of the southern breeze amongst the dewy flowers. She wuzsingin' old Scottish and English ballads, and more than one eye wuzwet as she sang about "Auld Joe Nicholson's Bonnie Nannie, " and "I'mWearin' Away, Jean, " and the dear old "Annie Laurie. " Miss Meechim looked worried and anxious, and sez she: "Oh, how I dowish Robert Strong wuz here. Oh, dear! what a trial it is to keepyoung folks apart. " And I sez: "What makes you try to? It is jest as nateral for 'em tolike each other's company as it is for bluebirds and robins to flyround together in the spring of the year, and no more hurt in it, as Ican see. " Sez she impressively: "Haven't I told you, Josiah Allen's wife, mywearing anxiety, my haunting fear that in spite of all my efforts andlabors Dorothy will marry some one in spite of me? You know howinvincibly opposed I am to matrimony. And you can see for yourselfjust how much admiration she gits everywhere, and one of those youngmen, " sez she, frowning darkly on a handsome young Englishman, "I amsure is in earnest. See the expression of his face--it is simplyworship. He would throw himself on his knees in front of her thisminute if there were not so many round. Oh, why don't Robert come andprotect her?" Her face looked fairly haggard with anxiety, but even as I looked theanxious lines wuz smoothed from her worried face like magic, and I seeRobert Strong come in and approach the group at the piano. Miss Meechim leaned back in her chair in a restful, luxuriousattitude, and sez she: "Oh, what a relief! What a burden has rolledoff from me! Robert knows just how I feel; he will protect her frommatrimony. Now I can converse with ease and comfort, " and she turnedthe subject round on missionary teas and socials and the best way toget 'em up. The next mornin' Arvilly didn't appear to breakfast. I waited sometime for her, for I wanted her to go sightseeing with me, and Arvillywuz as punctual as the sun himself about gittin' up in the mornin', and about as early. I thought to myself: "Is Arvilly a-goin' to come up missin', as ourdear Aronette did?" I wuz agitated. I sent to her room, but no answer. My agitation increased. I then went to her room myself, but my knockat her door elicited no reply. I then spoke in anxious, appealin'axents: "Arvilly, are you there? And are you sick a-bed? Or are you dead?Answer me, Arvilly, if either of my conjectures are true!" My axent was such that she answered to once, "I hain't dead, JosiahAllen's wife, and I hain't sick, only heart-sick. " Sez I, "Let me in then; I can't have you there alone, Arvilly. " "I hain't alone!" sez she. "Grief is here, and everlastin' shame formy country. " It come to me in a minute, this wuz the anniversary of her husband'sdeath, the day our govermunt's pardner, the licensed saloon, hadmurdered him down in Cuba. I sez, "May God help you, Arvilly!" And I turned onto my heel andleft. But I sent up a tray of good vittles which wuz refused, and Id'no as she eat a mou'ful that day. At night I went agin to the door, and agin I hearn the sound ofweepin' inside. Sez I, "Arvilly, let me in; I've got a letter for you from WaitstillWebb. " Sweet little creeter! She remembered her agony, and dropped thisflower onto the grave of Arvilly's happiness. Oh, how she, too, wuzsuffering that day, wherever she wuz, and I wondered as much as Tommyever did about the few cents the govermunt received for the deadlydrink that caused these murders and the everlastin' sorrow that flowedout of 'em. Well, Arvilly told me to put the letter under the door, which I did. But nothin' more could I git out of her; and though I sent up anothertray of food to her, that too come down untouched; and as I toldJosiah, I didn't know as I could do anything more for her, as bad as Ifelt, only to think of her and pray for her. "Yes, " sez he, "we will remember Sister Arvilly at the throne of graceat evenin' worship. " And after we went to our room he did make a ableprayer, askin' the Lord to look down onto the poor heart of ourafflicted sister, and send peace and comfort to her. It wuz a goodprayer, but even in that solemn time come the thought: "If you andother church-members had voted as you prayed, Arvilly no need to beshet up there alone with her life agony. " But it wuz no time to twit a pardner when we wuz both on our kneeswith our eyes shet, but when it come my turn I did say: "O righteous God, do help good men everywhere to vote as they pray. " Josiah said "Amen" quite loud, and mebby he duz mean to votedifferent. He voted license to help Jonesville, most of the biznessmen of the town sayin' that it would help bizness dretfully to havelicense. Well, it has helped the undertaker, the jail and thepoorhouse. Well, the next day Arvilly come down lookin' white and peaked, butdidn't say anything about her eclipse; no, the darkness wuz too awfuland solemn to talk about. But she showed me Waitstill's letter. In itshe said she had been for several days caring for a very sick womanfor half the night, and at midnight she would go back to the hospital, and every night for a week she had seen a bent figure creeping alongas if looking for something, payin' no attention to anything only whathe had in the searchin' eyes of his mind. It wuz Elder Wessel lookin' for Lucia, so Waitstill said. It wuz Lovewaitin' and lookin' out, hoping and fearing. Poor father--poor girl!Both struck down by a blow from the Poor Man's Club. She writconsiderable about Jonesville news to Arvilly, knowin', I spoze, howwelcome it would be, and said she got it from Ernest White. Wuz things comin' out as I wanted 'em to come? My heart sung a joyfulanthem right then and there. Oh, wouldn't I be glad to see Ernest andWaitstill White settled down and happy and makin' everybody round 'emhappy in the dear persinks of Jonesville and neighbor with 'em! Ernest White wrote to Waitstill how successful his Help Union was andhow his dear young people wuz growin' better and dearer to him everyday. And we talked about it how he wuz carryin' everyday reason and commonsense into Sunday religion. Sez Arvilly, "He teaches young voters thatwhile prayers are needful and necessary, votes are jest as needful, for bad or careless votin' destroys all the good that Christian effortduz, all that prayer asks for and gits from a pityin' God. Everysaloon is shet up in Loontown and folks flock to hear him from as furoff as Zoar and the town of Lyme. He don't have standin'-room in hismeetin'-house, let alone settin'-room, and they have got to put on anaddition. " And I sez agin what I had often said before, "What a object lessonElder White's work in Jonesville is, and how plainly it teaches what Ihave always known, that nothin' can stand aginst the united power ofthe church of Christ, and if Christian folks banded together and votedas they prayed, the Saloon, the Canteen, the Greedy Trusts, thelicensed house of shame, monument of woman's disgrace, would all haveto fall. " "But they won't do it, " sez Arvilly in a mad cross axent. "They'llkeep right on preachin' sermons against wrong and votin' to sustainit, if they vote at all. Gamblin' for bed-quilts and afghans to gitmoney to send woollen clothin' to prespirin' heathens in torridcountries, while our half-clad and hungry poor shiver in the coldshadder of their steeples oncared for and onthought on. " I sez, "Don't be so hash, Arvilly; you know and I know that the churchhas done and is doin' oncounted good. And they're beginnin' to bandthemselves together to help on true religion and goodness and peace. " "Well, " sez Arvilly, "I should think it wuz time they did!" I see a deep shadder settlin' down on her eye-brow, and I knowed shewuz a thinkin' of what she had went through. Well, the next day we sot out for Paris, via Marseilles. We had apleasant trip up the beautiful blue Mediterranean, a blue skyoverhead, a blue sea underneath. Once we did have quite a storm, makin' the ship rock like a baby's cradle when its ma is rockin' itvoylent to git it to sleep. I wuzn't sea-sick at all nor Tommy, but my poor companion suffered, and so did many of the passengers. There wuz a young chap who wuz thepicture of elegance when he come aboard, and dretful big feelin' Ishould judge from his looks and acts. But, oh, how low sea-sicknesswill bring the hautiest head! I see him one day leanin' up agin theside of the ship lookin' yeller and ghastly. His sleek clothes allneglected lookin', his hat sot on sideways, and jest as I wuz passin'he wuz sayin' to the aristocratic lookin' chap he wuz travellin'with: "For Heaven's sake, Aubrey, throw me overboard!" His mean wuz wild, and though I didn't like his words I made excusesfor him, knowin' that mankind wuz as prone to rampage round insickness and act as sparks are to fly up chimbly. But, take it as awhole, we had a pleasant voyage. We only made a short stay in Marseilles, but long enough to driveround some and see the most noted sights of the city, which is theprincipal seaport of France. On the northern part is the old town with narrer windin' streets andmiddlin' nasty and disagreeable, but interestin' because the old Romanramparts are there and a wonderful town hall. A magnificent avenueseparates the old part from the new, a broad, beautiful streetextendin' in a straight line the hull length of the city. Beyend isthe Prado, a delightful sea-side promenade. The new city is built round the port and rises in the form of anamphitheatre; the hills all round are covered with beautiful gardens, vineyards, olive groves and elegant country houses. Just acrost fromthe harbor is the old chateau where Mirabeau wuz imprisoned, poorhumbly creeter! but smart. He didn't do as he'd ort to by his wife, and Mary Emily realized it and wouldn't make up with him, though heargued his case powerful in their lawsuit. But he wuz a smart soldierand writ quite eloquent things. He stood for the rights of the peopleas long as he could, till they got too obstropulous, as they sometimeswill when they git to goin'. But I presoom he did desire his country'sgood. His poor body wuz buried with pomp and public mourning, and thena few years after taken up and laid with criminals. But good land!he'd got beyend it all. He had gone to his place wherever it wuz, andit didn't make any difference to him where the outgrown garment of hisbody wuz. But to resoom: The Cathedral is quite a noble lookin' edifice, builtso I hearn, on the spot where a temple once stood where theyworshipped Diana; not Diana Henzy, Deacon Henzy's sister. Josiahthought I meant her when I spoke on't, and said the idee of anybodyworshippin' that cranky old maid, but as I told him it wuz another oldmaid or bachelor maid, as I spoze she ort to be called, some yearsolder than Diana Henzy. Sez I, "This Diana wuz a great case to liveout-doors in groves and mountains. " Sez I, "Some say she was thedaughter of Zeus, and twin of Apollo. " And Josiah said them two wuz nobody he ever neighbored with. And I sez, "No, you hain't old enough. " And that tickled him; he duzlove to be thought young. There is a French Protestant church, where the English residentsworship, and churches and synagogues where other sects meet. We went to an Arab school, a museum, library and botanical garden, where we see beautiful native and foreign trees and shrubs andflowers. It has a splendid harbor, consisting of at least two hundredacres. The manufactures are principally glass, porcelain, morocco andother leathers, soap, sugar, salt, etc. , etc. The city has had manyups and downs, plagues, warfares, sieges and commotions, but seemsquite peaceful now. Mebby it put its best foot forrerd and tried to behave its very bestbecause we wuz there. Naterally they would, comin' as we did fromJonesville, the pride and centre of the Universe and America. But 'tennyrate everything seemed peaceful and composed. We only stayed there two days of rest and sightseeing and then restagin, and then sot sail for Paris. Our first mornin' in Paris dawned clear and beautiful. It was theFourth of July. 'Tain't often I do it, but I put my cameo pin onbefore breakfast, thinkin' that I could not assume too much grandeurfor the occasion. The pin wuz clasped over a little bow of red, whiteand blue, and in that bow and gray alpacky dress I looked exceedinglywell and felt so. Josiah put on a neck-tie bearin' all the national colors, with moreflamin' stars on it, I guess, than we've got States, but I didn'tcensure him, knowin' his motives wuz good. We all had comfortable rooms in the tarven. Arvilly wuz dressed inblack throughout; I hinted to her she ort to wear some badge in honorof the day, and she retired to her room and appeared with a bow madeof black lute string ribbin and crape. I felt dretful. I sez, "Arvilly, can't you wear sunthin' more appropriate to the occasion?" Sez she, "I know what I am about, " and her looks wuz such that Idassent peep about it. But mebby she meant it for mournin' for herpardner. I dassent ask. Josiah wuz readin' his Guide Book as earnestas he ever searched the Skripters, and he sez, with his fingermarkin' the place, "Where shall we go first?" Of course, we all wanted to visit the most noted sights of Paris. Andall on us fell in love with the gay, bright, beautiful, happycity--though Josiah fell in with French ways more than I did, owin' tohis constant strivin's after fashion. Why, I didn't know but he wouldgit to drinkin' whilst he wuz there, observin' the French custom ofdrinkin' their light wines at their meals. He intimated that he should most probable have cider on the table inbottles when he got home. "You know, " sez he, "that there is a hullbox of old medicine bottles to the barn. " But I told him that nothin' stronger than root beer, made by my ownhands out of pignut and sassparilla, should ever be sot on my table. But I may see trouble with him in that way. Whilst we wuz talkin'about it, I brung up to illustrate the principles I wuz promulgatin', the ivory tankard Arvilly pinted out to us in the American exhibit. It wuz a big ivory tankard holdin' enough liquor to intoxicate quite afew. Two big, nasty, wreathin' snakes (signifyin' the contents on't inmy mind) dominated one side and made the handle, and held the laurelwreath surroundin' it (signifyin' office-holders, so I spozed), in itsbig hungry mouth. On top of the hull thing stood a rarin' angry brute, illustratin' the cap-stun and completed mission of the whiskeybottle. Arvilly talked more'n half an hour to Miss Meechim about it, and I wuzglad on't. But when I brung that up, Josiah waved the subject off with a shrug ofhis shoulders in the true French way, though a little too voyalent. I had ketched him practicin' that movement of the shoulders before theglass. He had got so he could do it first rate, I had to own tomyself, though I hated to see him practise it so much, mistrustin'that it wuz liable to bring on his rumatiz. And I see in a letter he writ home: "Be sure, Ury, and weed the_jardin_, specially the onions, " and he ended the letler: "_Oh revwar, mon ammy. _" I knowed that it would make Ury crazy as a hen, and Philury, too, wonderin' what it meant, but couldn't break it up. But speakin' of"jardins, " we went to several on 'em, the last one we see the mostbeautiful seemin'ly of the lot. Jardin de Luxemburg Palais Royal, Tuilleries, Acclimation, Jardin des Plantes. There are hundreds of 'emscattered through the city, beautiful with flowers and shrubbery andstatutes and fountains and kept in most beautiful order and bloom atpublic expense. And we visited cathedrals, missions, churches, museums, the sewers, libraries, went through the galleries of the Louvre--milds and mildsof beauty and art, as impossible to describe as to count the leaves inJosiah's sugar-bush or the slate stuns in the Jonesville creek, and asnumerous as if every one of them leaves and slate stuns wuz turnedinto a glorious picter or statute or wondrous work of ancient ormodern art. I hain't a-goin' to try to describe 'em or let Josiah try, though he wouldn't want to, for he whispered to me there in a sort ofa fierce whisper: "Samantha Allen, I never want to set my eyes agin onanother virgin, if I live to be as old as Methulesar or a saint. "Well, there wuz sights on 'em, but they looked real fat and healthy, the most on 'em; I guess they enjoyed good health. And one afternoon when the sky wuz blue, the sun shone and the birdssung merrily, we went to that dretful place, the Paris morgue. Therewuz a crowd before the doors, for the Seine had yielded a rich harvestthat mornin'; there wuz five silent forms, colder than the marble theylay on, one a young woman with long hair falling about her whiteshoulders. Amongst the crowd that pressed forward to look at thatunfortunate wuz a bent, haggard form that I thought I recognized. Butif it wuz a father watching and waiting in dretful hope and still moredretful fear for the best beloved, I couldn't tell, for the crowdpressed forward and he disappeared almost before I saw him. And I toowuz agitated, for when I catched sight of the clustering hair, thepretty rounded arms and form, an awful fear clutched my heart that Itrembled like a popple leaf and I see Dorothy turn white as a sheetand Arvilly and Miss Meechim looked like them that sees a tragedy andso did Robert Strong and Josiah. But a closter look made us know that it wuz no one that we ever see. It wuz not the dear one who wuz in our hearts day and night, it wuznot our sweet Aronette and it wuz not Lucia. Poor father! doomed tohunt in vain for her as long as his tremblin' limbs could carry him toand fro under foreign skies and the sun and stars of his own land. Poor seekin' eyes, turnin' away at the very last from visions of greenpastures and still waters to look once more down the sin-cursedstreets of earth for his heart's treasure! Dying eyes, dim with ablack shadow, blacker than the shadow of the Valley, cast from Agonyand Sin, sold to the crazed multitude for its undoing by sane men forthe silver of Judas. Love stronger than life, mightier than death, never to be rewarded here. But we read of a time of rewards for deedsdone in the body. At whose dying beds will these black forms stand, whose shadows torment humanity, to claim their own and go out withthem to their place they have prepared here for their soul's dwelling?Hard question, but one that will have to be answered. Robert Strong and Dorothy wanted to visit the Pantheon; specially thetomb of Victor Hugo. It is a great buildin' with a dome that put mesome in mind of our own Capitol at Washington, D. C. It is adornedwith paintings and statutes by the most eminent artists and sculptors, and the mighty shades of the past seem to walk through the solemnaisles with us, specially before the statute of Victor Hugo. I feltconsiderable well acquainted with him, havin' hearn Thomas J. Read hisbooks so much. And as I stood there I had a great number of emotionsthinkin' what Victor had went through from his native land from firstto last: abuse, persecutions, sent off and brung back, etc. , and Ithought of how his faithful "Toiler of the Sea" went throughsuperhuman labors to end in disappintment at last. And Jean Valjean, the martyr, seemed to walk along in front of me patiently guardin' andtendin' little Cossette, who wuz to pierce his noble, steadfast heartwith the sharpest thorn in the hull crown of thorns--ingratitude, onrequited affection, and neglect. And we stood before the Column Vendome and meditated on that great, queer creeter, Napoleon. Who but he would think of meltin' the cannonshe had took in battle from his enemies and makin' a triumphal monumentof 'em a hundred and forty feet high, with his own figger on top. CHAPTER XXVI Well, Miss Meechim wanted to see the Goblin tapestry, so we visitedthe Goblin manufactory. These tapestries are perfectly beautiful, fourteen thousand shades of wool are used in their construction. Whatwould Sister Sylvester Bobbett say? She thought the colors in her newrag carpet went ahead of anything, and she didn't have more'n fourteenat the outside, besides black and but-nut color. But fourteen thousandcolors--the idee! Yes, we rid through the marvellously beautiful streets under triumphalarches and more warlike ones and visited all the most beautiful sightsin the city and the adjacent country, and who do you spoze I met as Iwalked along in the Bois de Boulogne? It wuz the Princess Ulaly. Therest of our party wuz some little distance off and I wuz santerin'along charmed with the beauty about me when who should I meet face toface but Ulaly. Yes, it wuz Ulaly Infanty. I wuz highly tickled, for I considered her a likely young woman andsot store by her when I met her to home at the World's Fair. Sheknowed me in a minute and seemed as glad to see me as I wuz her, and Isez to her most the first thing after the compliments wuz passed, "Whowould have thought, Ulaly, when we parted in Chicago, U. S. , that thenext time we should meet would be in Paris?" "Yes, indeed!" sez she, "who would have thought it. " And I went on tosay, for I see she looked real deprested: "Ulaly, things hain't come out as I wanted 'em to; I felt real badabout it after your folks sold their jewelry to help discover us. Idare presume to say they have been sorry time and agin that they everfound us, and I wouldn't blame 'em, for as Josiah sez to me: "'Where would we be to-day if it hadn't been for Columbus? Like enoughwe shouldn't been discovered at all. ' Sez he, 'Most probable we shouldbe Injins. ' But don't lay it to Josiah or me, Ulaly, we hain't toblame, we didn't do a thing to bring on the trouble. Of course weremembered the _Maine_ some, we had to, and your folks couldn't blameus for it. Josiah and me felt real provoked and mortified to thinkthat after folks had gin their jewelry to discover us they should blowus up in that way. But I sez to Josiah, 'Because three hundred aresent onprepared into eternity it hain't no reason three thousandshould be. ' We are great cases for peace, Josiah and I be, and wouldhave managed most any way, even been run on some and imposed upon alittle ruther than to have rushed into the onspeakable horrors ofwar. "And I don't want you to blame William, either; he held onto the dogsof war with both hands a tryin' to hold 'em in. " "William?" sez she inquirin'ly. "Yes, William McKinley, our President. He jest held onto them dogstill they wuz likely to tear him to pieces, then he had to leggo. Themdogs wuz jest inflamed by havin' yellow literatoor shook in theirfaces, and yells from greedy politicians and time servers, till theywuz howlin' mad and would have barked themselves blind if he hadn'tleggo. But he didn't want to, William didn't, he wanted peacedreadfully. " And she said real sweet, that she knew he did. "Well, it turned out jest as it did, Ulaly. But I think just as muchof you as I did before you lost your propputy, and I d'no as thepropputy Uncle Sam got hold of in the dicker is a goin' to do him muchgood, not for quite a spell anyway. There is such a thing as bein'land poor, taxes are heavy, hired help hain't to be relied on and themore you have the more you have to watch and take care on, though ofcourse it is a pleasure to a certain set of faculties and someparticular bumps in your head, to own a path as you may say, mostround the world, steppin' off from California to Hawaii and then on tothe Philippines, ready to step off from there, Heaven knows how fur orwhen or where. It is a pleasure to a certain part of your mind, butother parts of your head and heart hold back and don't cheer in theprocession. But howsumever, Ulaly, that is neither here nor there. Ihope your folks are so as to git round. I wuz sorry enough to hearthat you and your pardner don't live agreeable. But though it is apity, pardners have had spats from Eden to Chicago and I d'no but theyalways will. The trouble is they take pardners as boons instead ofdispensations, and don't lean hard enough on scripter. "But this is not the time or place for sermons on how to be happy, though married. How is Christina and Alfonso? I'm afraid he's gittin'obstropolous, and I d'no but Christina will have to give him a goodspankin' before she gits through. Of course, spankin' a king seemsquite a big job to tackle, and of course he's pretty old for it. Butit don't do to let children have their heads too much. One goodspankin' will strike in truth when reams of sermons and tearfulexpostulations will fail. You might just mention to Christina whatI've said, and then she can do as she wants to with fear andtremblin'. " But I see my folks passin' down a distant path, and I sez: "I will nowbid you adoo, Ulaly, as time and Arvilly and Josiah are passin' away. "She bid me a real pleasant good-by, and I withdrawed myself and jinedmy folks. One day the hull of our party visited Fontainbleu and went through theapartments of kings and queens and popes and cardinals. The rooms ofNapoleon wuz full of the thrilling interest that great leader alwaysrousted up, and always will, I spoze, till history's pages are torn upand destroyed. And in the rooms of Marie Antoinette we see the lovelycostly things gin to this beautiful queen when the people loved her, and she, as she slept under the beautiful draperies gin by thepeople, never dreamed, I spoze, that the hands that wrought love andadmiration into these fabrics would turn on her and rend her. But Marie didn't do right. Carelessness, oppression, neglect of thepeople's rights, a few grasping the wealth of the nation while thepeople suffer and starve, weave bloody colors into the warp and woofof life from Paris to New York and Washington, D. C. , and so on toJonesville. And we went through the apartments of Louis Philippe, Francis I. , Louis XIII. , etc. , and Madam Maintenon's apartments andDiana de Poyter's, and seen her monogram decorating the apartmentinterwoven with the king's. I hated to see it, but couldn't do nothin'to break it up at this late day. Miss Meechim walked through theseapartments with her nose in the air, having sent Dorothy into thegarden with Robert Strong and Tommy, and Arvilly wouldn't cross thethresholt, and I didn't blame her, though havin' my lawful pardner bymy side I ventered. But Arvilly led off into the beautiful gardens, where we found hersettin' with Robert Strong and Dorothy and Tommy by the fountain. We wanted to explore the forests of Fontainbleu, but only had time fora short drive through it, but found it most picturesque and beautifulwhat we see of it. Bein' such a case for freedom, Arvilly wanted to see the Column ofJuly riz up on the site of the old prison of the Bastile. And I did, too. I felt considerable interested in this prison, havin' seen thegreat key that used to lock up the prisoners at Mount Vernon--apresent to our own George Washington from that brave Frenchman andlover of liberty, Lafayette. A brave man held in lovin' remembrance by our country, and I spozealways will be, as witness his noble statute gin by our schoolchildren to France this present year. That his statute and G. Washington's should be gin to France by America, and that JosiahAllen's wife and Josiah should also be permitted to adorn theirshores simeltaneous and to once, what a proud hour for France! Wellmight she put her best foot forrerd and act happy and hilarious! But to resoom: The last afternoon of our stay in Paris, Arvilly and Iwent to see the Column of July, accompanied by my pardner, MissMeechim and Dorothy havin' gone to a matinée, and Robert Strong havin'took Tommy with him to see some interestin' sight. And I had a largenumber of emotions as we stood there and thought of all the horrowsthat had took place there, and see way up on top of the lofty columnthe Genius of Liberty holdin' in one hand the broken chains ofcaptives and holdin' up in her other hand the torch of liberty. But I methought to myself she's got to be careful, Liberty has, orthat torch will light up more'n she wants it to. Liberty is sometimesspelt license in France and in our own country, but they don' mean thesame thing, no, indeed! We hung round there in that vicinity seein'the different sights, and Josiah took it in his head that we shouldtake our supper outdoors; he said he thought it would be realromantic, and I shouldn't wonder if it wuz. 'Tennyrate, that is one ofthe sights of Paris to see the gayly dressed throngs happy as kingsand queens, seemin'ly eatin' outdoors. Lights shinin' over 'em, gaytalk and laughter and music sparklin' about 'em. Well, Josiah enjoyed the eppisode exceedingly, but it made it rutherlate when we started back to the tarven through the brightly lightedstreets and anon into a more deserted and quiet one, and on one ofthese last named we see a man, white-headed and bent in figger, walkin' along before us, who seemed to be actin' dretful queer. Hewould walk along for quite a spell, payin' no attention to anybodyseemin'ly, when all at once he would dart up clost to some young girl, and look sharp at her, and then slink back agin into his old gait. Thinkses I is he crazy or is he some old fool that's love sick. Buthis actions didn't seem to belong to either of the classes named. Andfinally right under a lamp post he stopped to foller with his eagereyes a graceful, slim young figger that turned down a cross street andwe come face to face with him. It wuz Elder Wessel--it wuz the figger I had seen at the morgue--but, oh, the change that had come over the poor creeter! Hair, white assnow; form, bowed down; wan, haggard face; eyes sunken; lookin' at uswith melancholy sombry gaze that didn't seem to see anything. Josiahstepped up and held out his hand, and sez: "Elder, I'm glad to seeyou, how do you do? You don't look very rugged. " He didn't notice Josiah's hand no more than if it wuz moonshine. Helooked at us with cold, onsmilin', onseein', mean, some like them samemoonbeams fallin' down on dark, troubled waters, and I hearn himmutter: "I thought I had found her! Where is Lucia?" sez he. The tears run down my face onbeknown to me, for oh the hunted, hauntedlook he wore! He wuz a portly, handsome man when we see him last, withred cheeks, iron-gray hair and whiskers and tall, erect figger. Now hehad the look of a man who had kep' stiddy company with Death, Disgrace, Agony and Fear--kep' company with 'em so long that he wuz astranger to anybody and everybody else. He hurried away, sayin' agin in them same heart-breakin' axents:"Where is Lucia?" Arvilly turned round and looked after him as he shambled off. "Poor creeter!" sez she. Her keen eyes wuz full of tears, and I knowedshe would never stir him up agin with the sharp harrer of her ironyand sarcasm if she had ever so good a chance. Josiah took out hisbandanna and blowed his nose hard. He's tender-hearted. We knowedsunthin' how he felt; wuzn't we all, Dorothy, Miss Meechim, Arvilly, Robert Strong, Josiah and I always, always looking out for a dearlittle form that had been wrenched out of our arms and hearts, not bydeath, no, by fur worse than death, by the two licensed Terrors whoseblack dretful shadders fall on every home in our land, dogs the stepsof our best beloved ready to tear 'em away from Love and from Safetyand Happiness. From Paris we went to Berne. I hearn Josiah tellin' Tommy: "It iscalled Burn, I spoze, because it got burnt down a number of times. " But it hain't so. It wuz named from Baren (bears), of which more anon. Robert Strong had been there, and he wanted Dorothy to see thescenery, which he said was sublime. Among the highest points of theBernise Alps and the Jungfrau and the Matterhorn, which latter peak isfrom twelve to fourteen thousand feet high. Good land! What if I hadto climb it! But I hadn't, and took comfort in the thought. Deep, beautiful valleys are also in the Oberland, as the southern part ofthe Canton is called, the Plain of Interlaken being one of the mostbeautiful. There are several railways that centre in Berne, and it stands at thecrossroads to France and Germany. And though it is a Swiss city, itseemed much more like a German one, so Robert Strong said. The people, the signs, the streets, the hotels and all, he said, was far more likea German city than a Swiss one. It is quite a handsome city of about fifty thousand inhabitants, withstraight, wide streets and handsome houses, and one thing I likedfirst-rate, a little creek called the Gassel, has been made to runinto the city, so little rivulets of water flow through some of thestreets, and it supplies the fountains so they spray up in a nobleway. Josiah sez: "If Ury and I can turn the creek, Samantha, so it will runthrough the dooryard, you shall have a fountain right under yourwinder. Ury and I can rig up a statter for it out of stuns and mortarthat will look first-rate. And I spoze, " sez he, "the Jonesvillianswould love to see my linimen sculped on it, and it might be a comfortto you, if I should be took first. " "No, Josiah, " sez I, "not if you and Ury made it; it would only add tomy agony. " We had quite a good hotel. But I see the hired girl had made a mistakein makin' up the bed. Mebby she wuz absent minded or lovesick;'tennyrate she had put the feather bed top of us instead of under us. As Josiah laid down under it he said words I wouldn't have had ElderMinkley heard for a dollar bill, and it didn't nigh cover his feetanyway. What to do I didn't know, for it wuz late and I spozed thewoman of the house had gone to bed and I didn't want to roust her up. And I knew anyway it would mortify her dretfully to have her help makesuch a mistake. Good land! if Philury should do such a thing I shouldfeel like a fool. So I had Josiah git up, still talkin' language onfitfor a deacon and a perfessor, and I put the bed where it belonged, spread the sheets over it smooth, put my warm woollen shawl and ourrailway rug on it and made a splendid bed. The food wuz quite good, though sassage and cheese wuz too much inevidence, and beer and pipes and bears. I always kinder spleenedaginst bears and wuz afraid on 'em and wouldn't take one for apresent, but it beat all how much they seem to think of bears there, namin' the place for 'em to start with, and they have bears carved andpainted on most everything. Bears spout water out of their mouths inthe fountains, they have dead ones in their museums, and they have abig bear den down by the river where great live ones can growl and actall they want to. And bears show off in a wonderful clock tower theyhave built way back in the 'leventh century. I never see Tommy sodelighted with anything hardly as he wuz with that, and Josiah too. Every hour a procession of bears come out, led, I believe, by arooster who claps his wings and crows, and then they walk round a oldman with a hour glass who strikes the hour on a bell. But the bearslead the programmy and bow and strut round and act. The manufactures of Berne are mostly cloth, silk and cotton, strawhats, etc. It has a great university with seventy-three professors. Good land! if each one on 'em knowed a little and would teach it theyort to keep a first-rate school. And it also uses a Referendum. Arvilly disputed me when I spoke on't;she thought it wuz sunthin' agin 'em, but it hain't. It helps thepeople. If they don't like a law after it passes the legislature theyhave a chance to vote on it. And it keeps 'em from bein' fooled bypoliticians and dishonest statesmen. I approve on't and Arvilly didwhen she got more acquainted with the idee. I wish America would gethold of one, and I guess she will when she gits round to it, thoughArvilly don't believe they will. Sez she: "Our statesmen ruther spendtheir time votin' on the length of women's hat-pins, and discuss whata peril they are to manhood. " Sez she: "Why don't they vote agin men'ssuspenders? Everybody knows a man could hang a woman with 'em, hang'em right up on the bed post. " Sez Arvilly: "Why not vote that menshall fasten their trousers to their vests with hook and eyes, theyare so much less dangerous?" But I don't spoze they ever will. It is ajob to fasten your skirt to your waist with 'em. But they are realsafe and I wish men would adopt 'em. But don't spoze they will, theyhate to be bothered so. Another thing I liked first-rate there and Arvilly did, thecorporation of the city is so rich it furnishes fuel for its citizensfree. Arvilly sez: "Catch the rich corporations of our American cities furnishin' fuelfor even the poorest. No; it would let 'em burn up their old chairs orbedsteads first, or freeze. " "Well, " sez I, "mebby our country will take pattern of the best of allother countries when she gits round to it; she's been pretty busylately. " And Arvilly sez, "She had better hurry up before her poor are allstarved or friz; but as it is, " sez she, "her statesmen are votin' onwimmen's hat-pins whilst Justice lays flat with her stillyards on topof her and Pity and Mercy have wep' themselves sick. " America is good, her charities are almost boundless, but I think someas Arvilly that Charity hain't so likely lookin' or actin' as Justice, and Robert Strong thinks so too. But it is a great problem what to dofor the best in this case. Mebby Solomon knew enough to grapple withthe question, but Josiah don't, nor Arvilly, though she thinks sheduz. Robert Strong is gittin' one answer to the hard conundrum oflife, and Ernest White is figurin' it out successful. And lots ofother good and earnest souls all over the world are workin' away atthe sum with their own slates and pencils. But oh, the time is long!One needs the patience of the Sphinx to set and see it go on, to laborand to wait. But God knows the answer to the problem; in His own goodtime He will reveal it, as the reward of constant labor, tirelesspatience, trust and prayer. But to resoom forwards: One of thepicturesque features of the older part of Berne is that the houses arebuilt up on an arcade under which runs a footpath. But its great feature is the enchantin' seenery. It stands on apeninsula and the view on mountain and river is most beautiful. From Berne we went direct to the city of Milan in Italy. And we foundthat it wuz a beautiful city eight or nine milds round, I shouldjudge, with very handsome houses, the cathedral bein' the cap sheaf. I'd had a picture on't on my settin' room wall for years, framed withpine cones and had spent hours, I spoze, from first to last lookin' atit, but hadn't no more idee of its size and beauty than a Hottentothas of ice water and soap stuns. From every point of view it is perfect, front side, back side, outsideand inside; specially beautiful are the gorgeous stained glass windersin the altar. Robert Strong and Dorothy and all the rest of the party but Josiah andme and Tommy clumb up to the biggest tower, three hundred and thirtyor forty feet, and they said the view from there wuz sublime and youcouldn't realize the beauty of the cathedral until you saw it fromthat place where you seemed to stand in a forest of beautifully carvedwhite marble. But I sez to 'em, "I can believe every word you saywithout provin' it. " I never could have stood it to clumb so high, but they said you couldsee way off the Appenines, the Alps, Mont Blanc, the Matterhorn, awonderful view. The cathedral is full of monuments to kings and queensand saints and high church dignitaries. Its carving, statuary, fretwork is beyend description. It is said to be the most beautiful in theworld and I shouldn't wonder, 'tennyrate it goes fur, fur beyend theM. E. Meetin'-house in Jonesville or Zoar or Loontown. Milan has beautiful picture galleries, and Miss Meechim and Arvillyand I wuz restin' in one one day, for we wuz tired out sightseein', when a young man and woman swep' by, both on 'em with glasses stuck intheir eyes, richly dressed and she covered with jewels, and their wuza maid carryin' wraps and a cushion, and a man carryin' twocamp-chairs, and a tall, slim tutor follerin' with a little boy. I d'no as the Queen of Sheba and Mr. Sheba could have travelled withany more pomp if they had took it into their heads to come toJonesville the Fourth of July. They didn't seem to be payin' anyattention to the pictures, though they wuz perfectly beautiful. Therewuz a group of titled people that had been pinted out to us, and theireyes wuz glued on them, and they seemed to be kinder followin' 'emround. They gin Miss Meechim a cool, patronizin' nod as they went by, and she gurgled and overflowed with joy over it. She said they wuz the Mudd-Weakdews, of Sacramento, Rev. Mr Weakdew'sonly child, and they wuz on their way home from Paris; he had marriedAugusta Mudd, a millionairess. "They are so exclusive, so genteel!"sez Miss Meechim, "they will not associate with anybody but the veryfirst. He wuz a college mate of Robert's and so different from him, "sez she. "Yes, " sez I, in a real dry tone, "I spoze he is, he looks differentanyway. " "He is engaged in the same occupation Robert is, " sez Miss Meechim, "and he would no more do as Robert does than he would fly. He keepshis workmen down in their place. Now Robert sells them land at a cheaprate and encourages a building association amongst the workmen, somost all of them own their own houses and gardens, and they cultivatefruits and flowers, making their homes look more like a genteel, wealthy person's than a laborer's; it makes them independent as youplease, heads right up, lookin' you right in the face, as if they wuzyour equals. Mudd-Weakdew don't let them own an inch of land; theylive in tenements that he owns and they pay high rents. The houses arelaborers' rooms, not genteel and comfortable as their employer's. Hesays that he makes as much out of the rent of these houses as he doesfrom his factory, for I must say that Robert's workmen do more workand better. But the Mudd-Weakdews live like a prince on a broad, tree-shaded avenue with a long row of tenement houses on the alleyback of it, separated from the poor, and what I consider a genteel, proper way. "Of course his workmen complain that they do all the work and he livesin a palace and they in a hovel, that he is burdened with luxuries andis hoarding up millions, whilst they labor through their half-starvedlives and have the workhouse to look forward to. So unreasonable! Howcan the poor expect the genteel pleasures of the wealthy, and whentheir houses are low and old and the walls mouldy and streets narrowand filthy and no gardens, and ten or fifteen in one room, they oughtnot to expect the comfort and pure air of four people in one greathouse set in a park. But such people can't reason. " "Who is the fourth?" sez I coldly, for I despised her idees. "They have a little girl older than Augustus and very different fromhim. Little Augustus is naturally very aristocratic and they encouragehim to look down on the tenement children and be sharp to them, forthey know that he will have to take the reins in his hands and controlrebellious workmen just as his pa does now, and conquer them just asyou would a ugly horse or dog. " "How is the little girl different?" sez I in cold, icy axents. "Oh, she is a perfect beauty, older than Augustus and at boarding-schoolnow. She is the idol of their hearts--even the workmen love her, sheis so gentle and sweet. Her parents adore her and expect that shewill unite them to the nobility, for she is as beautiful as an angel. "Little Augustus was terribly frightened just before we sailed, hisgrand-pa told me; one of them impudent workmen who had been sick andout of work for a spell rushed up to little Augustus, who was feedingcakes to his pony and Italian greyhound, and demanded him to give himsome. The man's fierce looks was such that Augustus dropped the cakesand ran away to his tutor. The man had the impudence to pick up thepieces and rush away with them, muttering that his own boy was dyingfor want of food, while this boy was throwing it away. What businesswas it to him, I would like to know. The man was turned off, Ibelieve. Mudd-Weakdew will stand no impudence; he builds up a wall ofseparation between himself and them that can't be broke down, just ashe has a right to. " Sez I, "Mebby it can't be broke down, but the wrongs and sufferin's ofone class is apt to react on the other. " "But it cannot here, " sez she, "for Mudd-Weakdew is not like Robert, mingling with his workmen, breaking down the wall of separation, thatalways has and I believe always should exist between the genteelwealthy and the poor. " "Well, " sez I, "time will tell. " And she went on. "You ought to see the elegance of their house, thirty house servantsand Robert has only two; and won't let them be called servants; hecalls them helpers. Oh, they are so genteel! they mingle with the veryfirst, and Robert might do just so, but he actually seems happieramongst his workmen trying to make them happier than he does with thetitled aristocracy. Mudd-Weakdew would no more mingle with his workmenas Robert does, than he would fly. " I murmured onbeknown to myself, "The poor received Him gladly;""Except ye do these things ye cannot be my disciples. " And I sez toMiss Meechim, "How would the Mudd-Weakdews receive the carpenter's Sonif he should stop at their gate some afternoon while they wuz givin' agarden party to nobility. If Jesus should enter there with his chosencompanions, the fishermen and the poor, all dusty from weary walks andbarefooted; if he should look through their luxury to the squalidhomes beyend with reproach and sorrow in his divine face, how wouldthey greet him?" Miss Meechim said she didn't really know, they wuz so very, veryexclusive, but she felt that they would act genteel anyway. "And, " sezshe, "they worship in a magnificent church built by millionaires andused by them almost exclusively, for of course poor people wouldn'tfeel at home there amongst the aristocracy. " But Arvilly said--I guess she had to say it--"Yes, they kneel andworship the Christ they crucified while they tromple on his teachings;hypocrites and Pharisees, the hull caboodle on 'em, Rev. Weakdew andall!" I d'no but Arvilly wuz too hash, but mebby my groans spoke asloud as her words; I felt considerable as she did and she knowed it. "Oh! oh!" Miss Meechim fairly squeeled the words out, "Rev. Weakdew isvery thoughtful and charitable to the poor always. I have wept to hearhim tell of their home above, right in with the rich you know, mingling with them; I have heard him say it, exclusive as he and hisfamily is, and how after starvation here how sweet the bread of lifewould seem to them. " "In my opinion, " sez Arvilly, "he better spend his strength tryin' tofeed 'em on earth; when they git to that country the Lord can takecare on 'em. " "Oh, he always has a collection taken up for the poor, Christmas andEaster, and his congregation is very charitable and give largely inalms and make suppers for the poor, Christmas, almost as good as thewealthy enjoy. " Sez Arvilly, "You can't put out the ragin' fires of a volcano with awaterin' pot; it will keep belchin' out for all of that littledrizzle; that seethin' kaldron of fire and ashes would have to becleaned out and the hull lay of the land changed in order to stop it. What good duz it do to scatter a few loaves of bread to the hungrywhile the Liquor Power and the mills of Monopoly are grindin' outhundreds and thousands of tramps and paupers every year?" Sez Miss Meechim, "the poor ye shall always have with you. " "We don't read, " sez Arvilly, "of Martha Washington having to feedtramps nor labor riots and strikers in the time of Jefferson. No, itwuz when our republic begun to copy the sampler of old nations'luxury, aristocracy and enormous wealth for the few and poverty andstarvation for the many. Copyin' the old feudal barons and thieves whoused to swoop down on weaker communities and steal all theirpossessions, only they gained by force what is gained now by corruptlegislation. Anybody would think, " sez Arvilly, "that as many times asthat sampler has been soaked in blood, and riddled by bullets, ourcountry wouldn't want to foller it, but they do down to the smalleststitch on't and how can they hope to escape their fate? They can't!"sez Arvilly. "But, " I sez, "they can't unless they turn right round in theirtracts. But I am a good deal in hopes they will, " sez I; "I am hopin'that Uncle Sam will foller my advice and the advice of otherwellwishers of the human race--I see signs on't. " "Well, " sez Arvilly, "you have fursightener specs than I have, if youcan see it. " And I sez, "You lay your ear to the ground, Arvilly, and you'll hearthe sound of a great approachin' army. It is the ranks of the Workersfor Humanity with voice and pen, with wealth and influence, the hatersof hate, lovers of love, breakers of shams and cruelties in creeds, political and social life and customs. Destroyers of unjust laws, truehelpers of the poor. It is them that try to foller Christ's missionand give liberty to the bound, sight to the blind. That great throngis growin' larger, every hour, the stiddy, stiddy tromplin' of theirfeet sounds nearer and nearer. " And I sez in a rapt way, "Whilst youare listenin' to 'em, Arvilly, listen, upward and you'll hear thesound of wings beatin' the air. The faint music, not of warlikebugles, but the sweet song of Peace. It comes nigher, it is the whitewinged cohort of angels comin' down to jine the workers for humanityand lead 'em to victory, and their song is jest the same they sungwhen Christ the Reformer wuz born, 'Peace on earth, goodwill tomen. '" Sez Miss Meechim, "I guess you hear the crowd on the avenue goinghome, and it is really time to go; it would not look genteel to staylonger. " I looked at her, and through her, and smiled a deep forgivin' smilefor I thought she wuz a foreigner, how could she understand. CHAPTER XXVII In the centre of the city of Milan is an artificial lake where theMilanise dearly love to go out in beautiful pleasure yots, and in thewinter it serves for a skating rink. Milan is noted for its charitableinstitutions, which owns property to the amount of forty or fiftymillions; it is a honor to her. It has flourishing colleges, lyceums, observatories, gymnasiums, famous libraries, institutes and schools ofall kinds, and the Academy of Fine Arts is celebrated all over theworld. It has a beautiful triumphal arch, begun in 1807 and finishedin 1838. They take their own time, them old Milanise do, but whentheir work is done, it is done. Josiah thought most probable they worked by the day. Sez he, "Men aremost always more shiftless when you pay by the day. " It has very fine public gardens, and one day we went to the CampoSanto. It is a beautiful spot; they say it has the finest sculptureand statuary in the world. We spent some time wandering around, resting our eyes on the beautiful marble forms on every side. They wuz a quiet crowd, too; jest as calm and silent as them they kep'watch over. Some of the most celebrated pictures in the world are to be seen inthe picture galleries at Milan, the Marriage of Mary and Joseph, byRaphael, is considered the most valuable. We went to see the fresco ofthe Lord's Supper, by Leonardo da Vinci, on the walls of an oldconvent. But the wall is crumbled and the picture is faded and worn;besides artists have tried to retouch it with just about as muchsuccess as Josiah would have if he undertook to paint the sky indigoblue, or Ury tried to improve a white lily with a coat of whitewash. But we loved to look on it for what it wuz before Time's hand had laidso heavy on it and artists had tried to protect it. We wuz in Milan over Sunday and so we went to the Cathedral toservice, and agin I realized its marvellous beauty and magnitude. Itsruff is supported by fifty-two columns, and it has eight thousandlife-sized statutes inside and outside, plenty enough for comfort evenif it wuz over-fond of statutes. The Lazaretto, once used as a plague hospital, is now used as anapartment-house for the poor; it has one thousand two-roomedapartments in it, a city in itself. Napoleon, ambitious creeter! wuz crowned king of Italy in Milan. And Iguess old Charlemaigne himself wuz, 'tennyrate a good many kings herehad the iron crown set on their forwards. I d'no what made 'em haveiron crowns, though Josiah said it would be real handy sometimes. Hesaid if a king wuz in a hurry, and you know they are sometimes in adretful hurry to be crowned before their heads are took off, it wouldbe real handy, for they could take the rim to a stove griddle, andstand up some velvet pints on it and it would fit most any head. Healso spoke of a coal-scuttle. But I said that I guessed they used iron to show that crowns are soheavy and bore down on their heads so. We visited Lake Como, Dorothy specially wantin' to see the palace ofCarlotta. Poor, broken-hearted Carlotta, whose mind and happiness wuzdestroyed by the shot that put an end to Maximilian's brave, misguidedlife. Poor Maximilian! poor Carlotta! victims of the foolish ambitions of anempress, so they say. I wuz glad to throw the blossom of a pityingthought onto their memory as I passed her house, opposite Belajio, thinkin' that it wuz befittin' a American to do so. Tears stood inDorothy's eyes as we recalled the sad tragedy. Lake Como deserves all that has been said of it, and more too. Theslopes of the mountains are dotted with vineyards, hamlets andbeautiful villas. And we see many little cabins where the familys oforgan-grinders live. Mebby the wife and children lived here of someswarthy creeter that I've fed offen my own back steps in Jonesvillefor grindin' out music for the children. It is only a journey of eight hours from Milan to Venice, and Veronais about half way. And it is almost like travellin' through a mulberrygrove. The valley of Lombardy is a silk-producing country and the dietof silkworms is mulberry leaves and the trees also serve as handsomeprops to the grape vines that hang from tree to tree. Fur off, like cold, sad thoughts that will come in warm happy hearts, we see the snow-capped mountains, and bime by it grew so cold that wewuz glad and grateful when we had cans of hot water handed to us atthe station. Josiah thought they wuz full of hot coffee and proposed to once thatwe should take some to meetin' with us in Jonesville to warm our feet. Sez he, "How delightful it would be, Samantha, to take a good drink ofhot coffee in meetin'. " "Yes, " sez I, "it would look nice to be drinkin' in meetin'. " "Oh, " sez he, "I mean to do it sly; I could scrooch down and pretendto be fixin' my shues. " But it proved to be nothin' but hot water inthe cans, but real comfortable to our feet. And the mulberry grovesput Josiah in mind of another innovation that might be made inJonesville ways. Sez he, "These silk raisers git rich as mud and jest see the number ofcaterpillars we have to hum; they might jest as well be put to work onsunthin' that will pay as to be eatin' up young squashes andcowcumbers for us to plant over. " Sez he, "Their work is worse thanwasted on us. " Sez I, "These silkworms hain't like our caterpillars, Josiah. " "Well, they may make silk of a different color, but who cares for thatwhen diamond dyes are so cheap, and if we wanted red silk we couldtry feedin' em on red stuff, beets, and red russets and such. Why, "sez he, "with Ury's help I could start a caterpillar bizness thatwould be the makin' of me. And oh, how I would love to robe yourfigger, Samantha, in silk from my own caterpillars. " "Well, well, " sez I, "let's not look ahead too much. " Sez I, "Lookthere up the mountain side and see the different shades of greenfoliage and see what pretty little houses that are sot there and seethat lovely little village down in the valley. " So I got his mind off. The costooms of the peasant wimmen are verypretty, a black bodice over a white chemise with short full sleevesand bright colored shirts, and hat trimmed with long gay ribbons. The men wear short, black trousers, open jackets and gay sashes, broad-brimmed white hats with long blue ribbons streamin' down. Josiahsez to me admirin'ly, "How such a costoom would brighten up ourcornfield if I and Ury appeared in 'em. " Sez I, "Ury would git his sash and hat ribbons all twisted up in hishoe handle the first thing. " "They might be looped up, " sez Josiah, "with rosettes. " We read about travel bein' a great educator, and truly I believe thatno tourist ever had any more idees about graftin' foreign customs ontoeveryday life at home than Josiah Allen did. Now at Lake Como where wesee washerwomen at their work. They stood in the water with theirskirts rolled up to their knees, but they still had on their whitechemisettes and black bodices laced over them and pretty white capstrimmed with gay ribbins. And Josiah sez, "What a happy day it would be for me and Ury if wecould see you and Philury dressed like that for the wash-tub; it wouldbrighten the gloom of Mondays considerable. " Well, they did look pretty and I d'no but they could wash the clothesjest as clean after they got used to it, but I shouldn't encouragePhilury to dress up so wash-days. And it wuz jest so when we see on Lake Como its swarm of pleasuregondolas glidin' hither and yon with the dark-eyed Italian ladies inbright colored costooms and black lace mantillys thrown over theirpretty heads and fastened with coral pins, and the gondoliers in gayattire keepin' time to the oars with their melogious voices. Josiahwhispered to me: "What a show it would make in Jonesville, Samantha, to see you and mein a gondola on the mill-dam, I with long, pale blue ribbins tiedround my best beaver hat and you with Mother Allen's long, black laceveil that fell onto you, thrown graceful over your head, and both ofus singin' 'Balermy' or 'Coronation. ' How uneek it would be!" "Yes, " sez I, "it would be uneek, uneeker than will ever come topass. " "Well, I d'no, " sez he, "Ury and me could make a crackin' good gondolaout of the old stun boat, kinder hist it up in front and whittle out ahead on it and a neck some like an old gander's. We could take oldHigh Horns for a model, and we could make good oars out of oldfish-poles and broom-handles, and you own a veil, and blue streamersdon't cost much--nothin' henders us from showin' off in that way butyour obstinate sperit. " But I sez, "I shall never appear in that panoramy, never. " "Oh, well, " sez he, gayly, "Jonesville has other females beside you, more tractable and more genteel. Most probable Sister CelestineBobbett and she that wuz Submit Tewksberry would love to float in agondola by the side of one of Jonesville's leadin' men. " I looked full in his face and sez, "Has foreign travel shook yourmorals till they begin to tottle? Have I got to see a back-sliddenJosiah?" Sez he, real earnest, "You are the choice of my youth, the joy of myprime of life. " "Well, then, " sez I, "shet up!" I wuz out of patience with his giddyidees, and wouldn't brook 'em. We laid out to go from Milan to Genoa till we changed our plans. Ithought it wuzn't no more'n right that we should pay Columbus thathonor, for I always wondered, and spoze always shall, what would havebecome of us if we hadn't been discovered. I spoze we should have gotalong some way, but it wouldn't have been nigh so handy for us. Ipresoom mebby Josiah and I would have been warwhoopin' and livin' intepees and eatin' dogs, though it don't seem to me that any coloredskin I might have could have made me relish Snip either in a stew orbriled. That dog is most human. I always felt real grateful to Columbus and knowed he hadn't been usedas he ort to be. And then Mother Smith left me a work-bag, most new, made of Genoa velvet, and I awfully wanted to git a little piece moreto put with it so's I could make a bunnet out of it. But Dorothywanted to see Verona and her wish wuz law to the head of our party, and when the head of a procession turns down a road, the rest of theprocession must foller on in order to look worth a cent. Miss Meechimsaid that it wuz on her account that he favored Dorothy so. But itwuzn't no such thing and anybody could see different if their eyeswuzn't blinded with self-conceit and egotism. But take them twotogether and there is no blinders equal to 'em. They go fur ahead ofthe old mair's, and hern are made of thick leather. Well, Robert thought we had better go on to Venice, stopping at Veronaon the way and so on to Naples, and then on our way back we could stopat Genoa, and we all give up that it wuz the best way. I always liked the name of Verona. Miss Ichabod Larmuth named hertwins Vernum and Verona. I thought it would be a real delicateattention to her to stop there, specially as we could visit Genoaafterwards. Well, havin' such a pretty name I felt that Verona would be a realpretty place, and it wuz. A swift flowing river runs through the townand the view from all sides is beautiful. The fur off blue mountains, the environin' hills, the green valleys dotted with village andhamlet, made it a fair seen, and "Jocund day stood tip-toe on themountain tops. " But to sweet Dorothy and me, and I guess to the most of us, it wuzinterestin' because Juliet Montague, she that wuz Juliet Capulet, oncelived here. I spoke on't to Josiah, but he sez: "The widder Montague; I don't remember her. Is she any relation of oldIke Montague of North Loontown?" But I sez: "She wuzn't a widder for any length of time. She died oflove and so did her pardner, Romeo Montague. " "Well, " said Josiah, "that shows they wuz both sap heads. If they hadlived on for a spell they would got bravely over that, and had moregood horse sense. " Well, I spoze worldlings might mock at their love and their saddoings, but to me the air wuz full of romance and sadness and thepresence of Juliet and Romeo. The house where she once lived wuz a not over big house of brick, nobigger nor better than Bildad Henzy's over in Zoar, and looked somelike it. Josiah said it wuz so silly to poke clear over to Italy to see thislittle narrer house when we could see better ones to home any day. Miss Meechim said that it didn't look so genteel as she expected, andArvilly made a slightin' remark about it. But Robert Strong said kinder low, "He laughs at scars who never felta wound. " His eyes wuz on Dorothy's sweet face as he spoke. And in her soft eyes as she looked at him I could almost see themeanin' of Juliet's vow, "To follow thee, my lord, throughout theworld. " We didn't go to Friar Laurence's cell where Mr. And Miss RomeoMontague wuz married and passed away, not knowin' exactly where itwuz, old Elder Laurence havin' passed away some time ago, but we didgo to the place they call her tomb; we rung a bell in the iron gate, paid a little fee, and was led by the hired girl who opened the gateto the place where they say she is buried. But I d'no as this is hertomb or not; I didn't seem to feel that it wuz, 'tennyrate the tombdon't look much like what her pa said he would raise above 'em: "A statue of pure gold; that while Verona by that name is known, thereshall no figure at such rate be set as that of true and faithfulJuliet. " Josiah not havin' come up to the mark in the way of sentimentat the house of Capulet, overdid the matter here; he took out hisbandanna, and after flourishing it enough to draw everybody'sattention to it, pressed it to his eyes and sort o' sithed. But I doubted his grief, though he made such elaborate preparationsfor it, and I told him so afterwards. He acted real puggicky and sez: "Can't I ever please you, Samantha? At the widder Montague's Pa's youthought I wuzn't sentimental enough, and I thought you would betickled enough to have me shed tears at her tomb. " "Did you shed tears, Josiah?" sez I. But he waved the question off and continued, "The guide told me thatfolks usually wep' some there, and I expected you all would, you areall so romantik and took up with the widder Montague and her pardner. I took the lead, but none of you follered on. " "Well, " sez I, "if you felt like weepin', Josiah, I wouldn't want tobreak it up, but to me it looked fur more like a waterin' trough thanit did like a tomb. " "Well, you know how it is in the older part of the Jonesvilleburyin'-ground, the stuns are all tipped over and broke. Mr. And MissCapulet have been dead for some time and probable the grave stuns havegone down. " Well, being kinder rousted up on the subject, I quoted considerablepoetry about Romeo and Juliet, and Josiah bein' kinder huffy andnaterally hatin' poetry, and real hungry, too, scorfed at and madelight on me. He kep' it up till I sez: "William Shakespeare said there wuz Two Gentlemen of Verona, and Ishould be glad, Josiah Allen, to think you made the third one; but atrue gentleman wouldn't make light of his pardner or slight herreminiscences. " Sez he: "Reminescin' on a empty stomach is deprestin', and don't setwell. " Well, it had been some time sence we had eat, and Tommy wuz gittin'hungry, too, so we returned to the tarven. In the afternoon we went to see the old Roman amphitheatre. It wuzprobably built not fur from A. D. Jest think on't! Most two thousandyears old, and in pretty good shape yet! It is marble, and couldaccommodate twenty thousand people. All round and under it is a arch, where I spoze the poor condemned prisoners wuz kep' and the wildbeasts that wuz to fight with 'em and kill 'em for the pleasure of thepopulace. Miss Meechim got dretful worked up seein' it, and she andArvilly had words, comparin' old times and new, and the different wildbeasts they encourage and let loose on the public. Arvilly's views, tinged and shadowed as they always are, by what she's went through, they both got mad as hens before they got through. There are ruins of a large aqueduct near, which wuz flooded withwater, I spoze, for acquatic sports way back, mebby back to Anna D, orbefore her. Some say that early Christians were put to death in thisamphitheatre, but it hain't very clearly proved. Well, we only stayed one day at Verona, and the next day we hastenedon to Venice. Josiah told me that he wanted to go to Venice. Sez he: "It is a placefrom what I hear on't that has a crackin' good water power and that isalways the makin' of a town, and then, " sez he, "I've always wanted tosee the Bridge of Size and the Doggy's Palace. " Sez he: "When a cityis good enough to rare up such a palace to dogs it shows there issunthin' good 'bout it, and I dare presoom to say there hain't a dogamongst 'em any better than Snip or one that can bring up the cows anybetter. " Josiah thinks we've got the cutest dog and cat in the world. He hasspent hours trainin' 'em, and they'll both start for the cow pasterjest the right time and bring up the cows; of course, the cat can't domuch only tag along after the dog; she don't bark any, it not bein'her nater to, but it looks dretful cunnin'. Sez Josiah, "I wouldn't beashamed to show Snip off by the side of any of the dogs in the Doggy'sPalace. " Sez I, coldly, "How do you spell dogs, Josiah Allen?" "Why, dog-es, doggys. " Sez I, "The palace was rared up by a man--a Doge--the Doges wuz greatmen, rulers in Venice. " "I don't believe a word on't, " sez he. "It is rared up for dogs, andI'm thinkin' quite a little of rarin' up a small house with a steepleon't for Snip. He deserves it. " Well, there wuzn't no use in argyin'; I knew he would have to give upwhen he got there, and so he did. And it wuz jest so with the Bridgeof Sighs, that has, as Mr. Byron said, "A palace and a prison on eachside. " Josiah insisted on't that it wuz called the Bridge of Size, because itwuz the most sizeable bridge in the world. But it is no such thing; itdon't begin, as I told him, with the Brooklyn Bridge; why, it hain'tno longer than the bridge between Loontown and Zoar, or the one overour creek, but I presoom them who passed over this bridge to executiongin deep, loud sithes--it wuz nateral they should--so the bridge wuznamed after them sithes. Josiah said if that wuz fashionable he should name the bridge downback of the barn the Bridge of Groans, it wuz such a tug for thehorses to draw a load over it. Sez he, "I almost always give a groanand so does Ury--Bridge of Groans. " Sez he, "that will sound uneekand genteel in Jonesville. " But mebby he won't do it; he often makes plans he don't carry out andhe gits things wrong--he did the very first minute we got there. We arrove in Venice about the middle of the afternoon, and as Roberthad writ ahead for rooms, a man wuz waitin' with a sizeable gondola totake us to our tarven. When Josiah see it drawin' nigh he sez to me, _soty vosy_, "Never, never, will I ride in a hearse; I wouldn't in Jonesville and I won'tin Italy; not till my time comes, I won't. " But I whispered back agin to keep still, it wuzn't a hearse. But, totell the truth, it did look some like one, painted black as a coal. But, seein' the rest of us embark, he, too, sot sail in it. He didn'thave to go a great ways before it stopped at our tarven, which wuzonce a palace, and I kinder hummed to myself while I wuz washin' meand puttin' on a clean collar and cuffs: "'Mid pleasures and palaces though we may roam, " puttin' the mainemphasis on palaces. But Josiah catched up the refrain and sung itquite loud, or what he calls singin': Be it ever so humbly, There's no place like hum. He looked round the vast, chilly, bare apartment, the lofty walls, themarble floors, with here and there a rug layin' like a leaf on asidewalk, and I kinder echoed it. Sez he feelin'ly and sort ofplaintively, "I'd ruther have less ornaments and more comfort. " I sez, "It is very grand and spacious. " And he sez, "I'd give the hull of the space and throw in the grandeurfor a good big fire and a plate of your nut cakes. " But I sez soothin'ly, "It is sunthin', Josiah, to live in a palace;"and I drawed his attention to the mosaic work on the floor, and themassive furniture covered with inlaid work. And he sez, "I'd ruther have less work laid into the furniture andsome decent food laid into my stomach. " Oh, what a appetite that man has got! It had kep' active all the wayfrom Jonesville around the world and wuz still up and a-doin'. Well, he can't help it. He acted real obstrupulous and onhappy. He has suchspells every little while. I mistrusted and he just as good as ownedup to me that it wuz partly owin' to his bein' dressed up all thetime; it wuz a dretful cross to him. He wears frocks to hum, rounddoin' the barn chores, and loose shues, but now of course he had noreprieve from night till mornin' from tight collars and cuffs and hisbest shues. But then, he had restless spells to hum and onhappy ones, and acted;and I told him he did and he disputed me right up and down. He didn'tfeel very well, anyway; he had told me that mornin' early how he pinedfor Jonesville, how he longed to be there, and how he didn't care fora thing outside of them beloved presinks. And I told him it wuzn'treasonable. Sez I, "Enjoy Jonesville while you are there and now enjoyEurope whilst you are here. " Sez he, with a real sentimental look, "Oh, Jonesville, how happy I'llbe if I ever see thee agin! How content, how blessed!" Sez I, "You wuzn't always happy there, Josiah; you oft-times gotrestless and oneasy there. " "Never!" sez he, "never did I see a onhappy or a tired day there in mylife. " But he did. He got down-casted there jest as he did here. I knowed howoften I had soothed and comforted his sperits by extra good meals. Buthe wouldn't own up to it, and seein' he looked so gloomy and deprestedI went to work and episoded some right there, whilst I wuz comin' myhair and dressin', in hopes that it would bring a more happy andcontented look onto his liniment, for what will not a devoted pardnerdo to console her consort? Sez I, "Josiah, life is a good deal like the Widder Rice's yarn I'veheard Ma Smith tell on. She wuzn't a smooth spinner and there would bethick bunches in her yarn and thin streaks; she called 'em gouts andtwits. She'd say, 'Yes, I know my yarn is full of gouts and twits, butwhen it's doubled most likely a gout will come aginst a twit and makeit even. '" And I eppisoded to myself and to Josiah, "That is a good deal likelife. The good of this world seems onequally divided some times, butthe rich has troubles and the poor have compensations. The poor manhas to git up early and toil all day, but if he hates to leave his bedso early mornings, his sleep is sweet while he rests, and his labormakes his food taste good and nourishes his strength, while the richman who can lay till noon, turns on his restless pillow and can'tsleep night or day. And while he has plenty to buy rich viands he hasno appetite to eat or health to digest his food. "The morning song of the lark sounds sweet to the laborer as it risesover the dew-spangled fields, as he goes forth to his daily toil, while the paid songs the rich man hears palls on his pleasure-tiredsenses. At home you have rest of body, and in travel you haveeducation and variety; yes, the gouts and twits in life even up prettywell and the yarn runs pretty smooth offen the reel of Time to thetraveller and the stay-at-home, the rich and the poor. " Josiah wuz brushin' his back hair with two brushes (one would havebeen plenty enough), and he kep' on with his employment and sezwithout lookin' up: "I wonder where the Widder Rice's grandson, Ezra, is? He wuz out tothe West the last I hearn on him. " There it wuz! My eloquence had rolled offen him like water from a tineavespout; hadn't touched him at all nor uplifted him, though I feltreal riz up. You know you can talk yourself up onto quite a hite ifyou try; but Josiah wuzn't moved a mite from the place he'd stood on. Well, that wuz one of the gouts in my yarn of life, but a twit wuznear by--it had its compensation. He worships me! And I went on andeppisoded to myself to bring myself up to the mark as I wadded up myback hair. Sez I to myself: "If Josiah had the eye to see the onseeneagles soarin' up in the sky above his head, mebby he would also seemy faults too plain. If he could hear in winter midnights the murmurof dancin' waters and the melogious voice of the south wind blowin'over roses and voyalets, he might also hear the voice of Distrust. Ifhe had the wisdom of Solomon he might also have his discursivefancies, his various and evanescent attachments. But as it is, hislove is stiddy and as firm as a rock. So the gouts and the twitsevened each other up after all, and the yarn run pretty smooth. " CHAPTER XXVIII The next mornin' Tommy wuz delighted with the idee of goin' in a boatafter some hair-pins for me and a comb for him--he had broke hisen. Itwuzn't fur we went, and I spoze we might have walked by goin' a littlefurder; but variety is the spice of life, and it seemed to kinderrefresh us. Floating in a gondola on the Grand Canal of Venice is a beautifulexperience when the soft light of the moon and stars is restin' on thestately old marble palaces, the tall pillars of St. Theodore and theWinged Lion, obelisk and spire. With other gondolas all about you, youseem to be on a sea of glory, with anon music from afar coming sweetlyto your ears from some gondola or palace, and far up some narrow waterstreet opens with long shafts of light flashing from the gondolier'slantern or open window. It is all a seen of enchantment. Though if you should foller up some of them narrow water streets bydaylight, you would see and smell things that would roust you up fromyour dream. You would see old boats unloadin' vegetables, taking ongarbage, water-boats pumpin' water into some house, wine shops, cookshops; you would see dilapidated houses with poorly clad peoplestandin' in the doorways; ragged, unkempt children looking down on youfrom broken windows, and about all the sights you see in all thepoorer streets of any city, though here you see it from a boat insteadof from a hack or trolley car. Green mould would be seen clinging tothe walls, and you would see things in the water that ortn't to bethrowed there. Moonlight and memory rares up its glittering walls, but reality andthe searchin' life of the present tears 'em down. Where are the threethousand warships, the three thousand merchant ships, that carried thewealth and greatness of Venice back in the fifteenth century;fifty-two thousand sailors, a thousand nobles and citizens and workingpeople according? Gone, gone! Floated way off out of that Grand Canaland disappeared in the mists and shadows of the past, and you have togo back there to see 'em. The Rialto, which we had dremp about, looked beautiful from the water, with its one single arch of ninety-one feet lifting up six arches oneach side. But come to walk acrost its broad space you find it isdivided into narrow streets, where you can buy anything from a crownto a string of beads, from macaroni to a china teapot. The great square of St. Mark wuz a pleasant place on an evening. Little tables set out in the street, with gayly-dressed peoplelaughing and talking and taking light refreshments and listening tothe music of the band, and a gay crowd walking to and fro, andpicturesque venders showing their goods. But to Tommy nothing wuz so pretty as the doves of St. Mark, who comedown to be fed at two o'clock, descending through the blue sky like ashower of snow. The Campanile or bell-tower towers up more than three hundred feetabove the pavement; way up on the tower two bronze statutes stand withhammers and strikes off the hours. Why is it that the doves pay noattention to any other hour they may strike but when the hour of twosounds out, a window on the north side of the square opens and somegrain is thrown out to 'em (the Government throws it to 'em, dretfulgood natered to think on't)? But how did them doves know two fromthree? I d'no nor Josiah don't. I had provided Tommy with some foodfor 'em and they flowed down and lighted on him and Dorothy, who alsofed 'em; it wuz a pretty sight. And Robert Strong thought so too, Icould read it in his eyes as he looked at Dorothy with the prettydoves on her shoulder and white hands. I got some sooveneers for the children at Venice, some little ivorygondolas and photographs, etc. , and Miss Meechim and Dorothy gotsights of things, Venetian jewelry, handsome as could be, and Arvillygot a little present for Waitstill and a jet handkerchief pin forherself. She mourns yet on the inside and outside, yes, indeed! and Id'no but she always will. And as you can git a relic of most everything at some of the shops Itold Josiah I would love to git hold of one of them old rings that theDoges married the Adriatic with. And if you'll believe it that mandidn't like it; sez he real puggicky: "I hope you hain't any idee of marryin' the Jonesville creek, Samantha, because it won't look well in a M. E. Sister and pardner. " Jealous of the creek! That's the last thing I ever thought that manwould be jealous on. The idee! I only wanted it out of curiosity. We visited the Arsenal, another spot where the greatness of Venice inthe past hanted our memory, when she had twenty thousand workmen thereand now not two thousand. But we see queer lookin' things there--suitsof armor, crossbows, helmets. Josiah took quite a fancy to one wore byAttila, king of the Huns, and wanted to put it on. Good land! his headwent right up into it just as it would into a big coal-scuttle. What amind Mr. Attila must have had if his brains wuz accordin' to hishead. And we see infernal machines, thumb screws, spiked collars, and otherdretful implements of torture like black shadders throwed from thepast. A piece of the boat that the Doge went to his weddin' in when hemarried the water wuz interestin'; weddin's always did interestfemales and males too, no matter whether the bride wuz formed out ofdust or nothin' but clear water, and we also see a model of the boatColumbus sailed in to discover us. Robert Strong who wuz always interested in the best things, said thatthe first newspaper ever published appeared in Venice three hundredyears ago, and the first bank was started there. You can walk all over Venice if you want to take the time to go furderround and cross the bridges and walk through narrer, crooked littlestreets, some on 'em not more'n five or six feet wide, but the easiestand quickest way is to take a boat, as well as the most agreeable. Venice is built on seventy-two islands besides the Grand Canal whichtakes the place of our avenues and streets. There is a charm aboutVenice that there is not about any other city I ever see. You dreamabout it before you see it and then you dream on and keep dreamin' aslong as you stay there, a sort of a wakin' dream, though you keep yoursenses. Memories of the past seem to hant you more, mebby it is because themold memories can slip along easier over them glassy streets, easierthan they can over our hard rocky pavements. 'Tennyrate they meet youon every side and stay right with you as long as you are there andhant you. As you float down them liquid roads you seen face to facesweet, wise Portia, "fair and fairer than that word;" and gallantBassanio who made such a wise choice, and Shylock, the old Jew. And ifyou happen to git put out with your pardner, mebby he'll find faultwith you, and say demeanin' words about wimmen or sunthin' like that, whilst sweet Portia's eyes are on you, if you feel like reprovin' himsharp, then you'll remember: "The quality of mercy is not strained, itdroppeth like the gentle rain from heaven, it blesseth him that givesand him that takes. " And so you forgive him. And then beautiful, sad Beatrice de Cenci willmeet you by moonlight in front of some of them old marble palaces andher pa, about as mean a man as they make, and his sister, Lucretia deBorgia, that wicked, wicked creeter. Why, it beats all what mean folksBeatrice's relation wuz on her pa's side. And you thought of any number of queer old Doges, rainin' and pizenin'and actin', some on 'em, and marryin' the Adriatic; a poor match in myopinion and one that you couldn't expect to turn out well, the bridebein' slippery and inconstant and the bridegroom mean as pusley, crueland cunning, besides bein' jest devoted to the Council of Ten. Queerworks them Ten--made and cut a great swath that won't be forgot andthey needn't expect it. The page of history is sticky and bloody withtheir doin's. But they move along in front of you, the Doges, the Tenand the Three. And any number of conquerors and any number of Popesand Kings down to Victor Emanuel. And I d'no as I thought of anybody or anything there in Venice so muchas I did of John Ruskin, who give even the stuns of Venice a languagethat will go on speakin' long after the stuns have mouldered back intodust. And then the dust will keep his memory green, and folks willponder the "Ethics of the Dust" long after that dust has passed intoother changing forms and disappeared. Great mind, great lovin' heart, who had but one thought, to make theworld more full of beauty, knowledge, sincerity and goodness. Hispure, bright intellect, his life white as the lilies, his livingthoughts and noble idees they rap at the human heart, as well as mind, with their powerful sesame, and you have to open your heart's door andtake them in. Prophet of earth and heaven, the air, the clouds, thebirds and trees, the rocks and waters, translatin' the marvellouswords so our duller eyes and ears can see and hear. As I walked along over them stones of Venice, and in the Galleries ofModern Painters and ancient ones, my heart kep' sayin' onbeknown tomyself and them round me, "John Ruskin, noble soul, great teacher, childlike, wise interpreter of the beauty and ministry of commonthings, hail and farewell!" For he had gone--it wuz true that he whohad loved the flowers so and said to a friend who had sent him some:"I am trying to find out if there are flowers that do not fade. " Hehad found out now, wreathes of heavenly immortelles are laid on histired forward, not tired now, and he has his chance to talk to Mosesand Plato, as he said he wanted to, and he is satisfied. Love andSympathy that he longed for comforts and consoles him, and Beauty andGoodness wait on him. Robert Strong felt just as I did about Ruskin, their idees abouthelpin' the poor, and the brotherhood of man, and fatherhood of God, wuz as congenial and blent together like sun and dew on a May morning. Robert Strong said no other writer had done him the good Ruskin had. And I guess Dorothy thought so too; she almost always thought jest asRobert did. In wanderin' round this uneek city Josiah said the most he thought onwuz of tellin' Deacon Henzy and Uncle Sime Bentley about what he seethere. And shadowy idees seemed to fill his mind about tryin' to turnthe Jonesville creek through the streets and goin' from our house toThomas Jefferson's in a gondola. Arvilly said she would gin anything to canvas some of them old Dogesfor the "Twin Crimes". But I told her I guessed they didn't need tolearn anything about crime, and she gin up they didn't. The first thing Miss Meechim wanted to see wuz the church of St. Mark, so we all set off one day to see it. San Marco, as they call it, isone of the most interestin' churches to visitors on the Continent. Itwuz begun way back in the tenth century, and it has been in process ofbuilding ever since, and I don't know how long they lay out to keep atit. They have spent thirty millions on it, so I hearn, and the newscome pretty straight to me, and I d'no but they'll spend as much aginbefore they git through. But when you see all its magnificentsculpture, columns, statutes, mosaic work, ornaments of every kind, its grand arches, its five domes and spires and all the exquisite workon it I d'no as I'd took the job for any less, and so I told Josiah. But he kep' up his old idee he had voiced in many a similar spot, thatit wuz done by day's works and the workmen didn't hurry, and that itwould have been cheaper to had it done by the job. But how could they, dribblin' along as they did ten hunderd years? The four horses over the main entrance are very noted. They are saidto have been carved way, way back by Augustus to celebrate a triumphover Antony and to have passed through the hands of Nero, Constantineand Napoleon. Napoleon, a greedy creeter always, took 'em to Paris, but had to bring 'em back. For horses that are so old and have been driv round and showed off byso many conquerors, they look pretty sound and hearty. But Josiahdidn't like their looks nigh so well as he duz the mair's, and sez he, "That off one looks balky. " But I sez, "Distance lends enchantment; the mair can't begin with'em. " The altar piece is said to have cost three million. It is of gold andsilver, and full of precious stuns. It was made in Constantinople athousand years ago, and has got inscriptions on it that I presoom readwell if anybody could read 'em. But I couldn't nor Josiah. But RobertStrong read some on 'em to Dorothy, for I heard him. They are writ inLatin and Greek. When we got back to the tarven that night we found a hull pile ofletters from Jonesville, and amongst the rest I got a letter fromElder Minkley, good old man of God, and Arvilly got one too; he setsstore by Arvilly now, he and his wife duz, and they pity her dretfullyfor what she has went through, and make allowances for her hashness, but never shall I forgit the way she talked to him right in my ownsettin' room when she first come home from Cuba after her husband hadbeen murdered by the licensed Canteen. She come to our house one day, and Elder Minkley, good old soul, comein just after she did for a all-day's visit, poor creeter! I guess hewuz sorry enough he come, some of the time; I guess he wished he wuzback in his study perusin' the book of martyrs or anything elsedeprestin', and would have thought 'em fur livelier than what he gotinto. The way on't wuz, Arvilly had met Miss Deacon Sypher at the gate andshe bein' dretful onfaculized with no more tact than a settin' hen, had tackled Arvilly for a contribution to buy a flag to send to ourboys in Cuba, and talked enthusiastic about the war's holy mission. And I spoze Sister Sypher wuz skairt almost into fits to hear Arvillygo on, 'tennyrate she left her sudden and to once, and started home'cross lots almost on the run, and Arvilly come into the house talkin'and mutterin'. "Drusilly Sypher knows a sight about it; our army gone to redresswrongs and protect innocence! they better look to home and redresswrongs here; half the citizens of this country in legal bondage, andthe hull country cowering under a crime and danger protected andlegalized; if I didn't want to make myself a mark for demon laughterI'd quit such talk till I repented my sins in sackcloth and ashes. " "Well, well, Arvilly, set down, set down, " sez I, for she wuzrampagin' round the room back and forth, "set down, and here, " sez I, handin' her a bottle, "smell of the camfire, Arvilly, you look bad, "and she did look frightful bad, pale and fiery, and burnin' mad atsunthin' or somebody. But she waived it off with scorn: "Camfire can't heal the smart, orsweeten the air of the country; no, it needs fire from on high to burnit out. And it will come, " sez she, "it will come. " Why, she acted real wild and by the side of herself, and I pitied herlike a dog, and wuz at my wit's end what to say to her, and I wuz gladenough to see Elder Minkley, good old saint, comin' up the steps and Iwent to open the door with alacrity and my left hand, my right handwuz in the dough, I wuz makin' fried cakes, and I shook hands with himthe same, and I sez: "How glad I am to see you this morning, Brother Minkley, " littlethinkin' what wuz to come. He took off his hat and overcoat and hung 'em up in the hall andlooked in the glass in the hall rack with his mild, benevolent eyes, and brushed his thin, gray hair up on the bald spot over his benignforward, and follered me into the settin' room, and I sez, "Here isshe that wuz sister Arvilly Lanfear. " And the good old soul advanced with a warm, meller smile on his face, and sez: "How do you do, Sister Arvilly. " But Arvilly's eyes snapped worse than ever; she never noticed hisoutstretched hand, and she sez, "Don't you sister me. " "Why! why!" sez he, "what is the matter?" His welcomin' hand droppedweakly by his side, and bein' dretful confused and by the side ofhimself, he sez: "I hain't seen you before sence you--you----" "Deserted from the army, " sez she, finishin' the sentence for him. "Yes, I deserted, I am proud to say; I never had a right before underthis nation's laws and I took that right; I deserted and they couldn'thelp themselves; mebby them men see how it would feel to grin and bearfor once, just as wimmen have to all the time. " Brother Minkley had by this time begun to find and recover himself, and he sez with real good nature, "I meant to say, dear sister, that Ihadn't seen you before since you lost your husband. " "Since you murdered him, " sez she. "I--I murder a man?" He looked pale and trembled like a popple leaf. "Yes, you and all other good men who stood by like Pilate, consentin'to his death, " Arvilly went on. Elder Minkley looked too dazed and agitated to speak, and Arvillycontinued: "Do you pretend to say, Elder Minkley, that there is anevil law on the face of the earth that the Church of Christ couldn'toverthrow if it chose to do so?" He sez, "The power of the Church is great, Sister Arvilly, butno-license laws don't stop drinking; liquor is sold somehow; folksthat want it will get it. " "What a argument!" sez Arvilly, liftin' her eyes to heaven. "But youhain't answered my question, " sez she, short as pie crust, mince piecrust, "Is there an evil law existing to-day that the Church of Christcould not overthrow if it tried to?" "Well, no, " he admitted, "I believe that the Church of Christ isinvincible. " "Do you vote, Elder Minkley?" "Well, no, as it were, Sister Arvilly, I have felt for years thatpolitics was too vile for me to mix myself with. " Sez Arvilly, "Do you believe in following the Lord Jesus Christ?" Sez Elder Minkley, his good natured face lighting up, "My DivineMaster; yes, I will follow him to the stake, to the death, if needbe. " "Did he turn away from sinners and the evils of the sinful world andsay they wuz too vile for him to mix with?" "I--I--Sister Arvilly--I why--I don't know what you mean. " "Yes, you do know what I mean!" sez the intrepid but agonizedArvilly. "By your criminal indifference and neglect, you encourage the evilpower that rules and ruins. " Elder Minkley's face began to look red--red as blood--and sez he, "Youpresent the subject in a way I never thought on before, SisterArvilly. I will think of it; I will pray over it. " "Will you vote as you pray?" sez Arvilly anxiously. "I will!" sez Elder Minkley, solemnly, "I will!" Arvilly come forward and took holt of his hand. Her stern meansoftened; there wuz tears in her keen eyes; she looked different. Sezshe, "Next Sunday I shall set under your preachin', Elder; I hain'tfelt like settin' under it before. " And, sure enough, she did go tomeetin' the next Sunday and from that day they have been the best offriends. But to resoom forwards: I had a letter from Philury, she said she wuzall well. It wuz a letter that brought me some comfort and quite a lot of care;it wuz some like a peppermint lozenge, considerably sweet with a sharptang to it, makin' me think of the sweetness and repose of home withits accompaniment of anxiety and labor. The children writ real good letters to their pa and me, full ofaffection and thoughtfulness. Thomas J. Told us considerable about theHelp Union and the good that Ernest White and his helpers wuzaccomplishing in Loontown and Jonesville. And Tirzah Ann wanted toknow if reveres had gone out and hoops comin' in; she had hearn so andfelt anxious. There had been a rumor in Jonesville to that effect, butshe couldn't place full dependence on it. Thomas J. 's and Maggie's letters wuz full of gratefulness for Tommy'srestored health and what I'd done for him. No matter what else theysaid that idee wuz runnin' along under the rest of their thoughts, some like the accompaniment of a melodean to a sam tune in meetin'. And Tommy himself had letters from his pa and ma full of love and goodadvice, about half and half. One of the most interestin' places in Venice is the Doges Palace, andI spoze Josiah never gin up his idee about it until we stood right infront of it. But when he see that marble front, full of noble columns, elaborate carvin', arches, balustrades and base reliefs, he had to ginup such a place as that wuz never rared up to a dog or to any numberon 'em, though he said when I convinced him of his mistake: "Snip wuztoo good to mingle with 'em, he was likelier than any Doge that everlived there, no matter whether you spelt 'em dog or doge. " And I sez soothin'ly: "Like as not and 'tennyrate how I would love tohear Snip bark out a welcome to us once more. " "Yes, " sez Josiah, "it will be the happiest hour of my life when Ibehold Snip and the cat and the children and grandchildren and therest of the Jonesvillians once more. " Here in the marble pavement are two great bronze cisterns elegantlysculptured, and you can look up the Grand Staircase with two statutesat the top on either side, Neptune and Mars; and that wuz the placewhere the old Doges wuz crowned. On the staircase on each side are beautiful statutes and columns, elaborate carving and richly colored marbles. The Hall of the GreatCouncil is one hundred and seventy-five feet long and most a hundredin width, broad enough and high enough to entertain broader and noblerviews than wuz promulgated there. But it contains costly and beautifulpictures; one by Tintoretto is eighty-four feet wide and most fortyfeet high, the largest picture on canvas in the world so I've hearn, and others by Paul Veronese and the other great masters. All round the wall, like a border in a Jonesville parlor, are theportraits of the Doges of Venice in their red robes and round-toppedcaps. But where Marino Faliero should have hung wuz a black curtain. Well, he wuz a mean creeter; it is a good thing he can be shut outwith a curtain. Josiah said he thought it would be a crackin' goodplan to have a black curtain hung before the pictures of some of ourpublic men, but Arvilly said, in a real dry tone, that "If we begunthat it would bring up the price of black cloth enormously. " She mourns yet quite a good deal in her best dresses, and lookedahead, and didn't want the price of crape and bombazine riz. Among the pictures of these old Doges wuz one who led the army in anattack on Constantinople at the age of ninety-seven, when most old menare bedrid with a soap-stun and water gruel. And Francesco Foscari, who worked nobly for thirty-five years and wuz then abused shameful bythe Ten and turned out of office. Them old Doges had their ups and downs; riz up to power, throwed downagin. Mean as the Old Harry, some on 'em, and some workin' well forthe public. And some after servin' the public for years wuz banished, some beheaded, some had their eyes put out, one died of vexation, onewho wuz deposed died when the bell rung in his successor. A few diedin battle, but only a few on 'em passed away in their beds after alingerin' and honorable sickness with their one wife and childrenweepin' about 'em. You can see the open place in the wall where the written complaintswuz put aginst somebody or anybody, guilty or innocent, and wuz prettysure to be acted upon by the dretful Ten settin' there in their blackrobes and black masks, fit color for their dark and cruel deeds. We went down to see the dungeons, dark, cramped, filthy holes in thesolid wall: only a little light sifted in from the corridor through anarrow slit. It seemed as if them places wuz so awful we couldn't bearto look at 'em. But we went down into still deeper dungeons way belowthe canal, dretful places where you can't hardly draw a breath. We seedim traces of writings on the walls some wretched prisoner waitin' fordeath had writ there. How did he feel when he writ it? I didn't wantto know, nor have Josiah know. We didn't make a very long stay in Venice, but journeyed on toFlorence--Florence the beautiful. It lays in a quiet, sheltered valleywith the Apennine Mountains risin' about it as if to keep off danger. The river Arno runs through it, spanned by handsome bridges. The oldwall that used to surround it with its eight gates, has been destroyedsome years ago. As I say, it is a beautiful city, although it wuz more grand andpopulous when it wuz the capital of Italy. Dorothy said it was wellnamed the City of Flowers, for there wuz flowers everywhere, themarkets full of 'em, flower girls at every turn, balconies and windowsoverrunning with them, public gardens and private gardens sweet withtheir brightness and perfume. CHAPTER XXIX The next morning after we arrived at Florence we sallied outsightseeing. We all went out together, but separated after a while, promising to meet at luncheon time at our tarven, but we all wenttogether as fur as the Cathedral. It is a noble buildin', covered withred, white and black marble, elegantly ornamented with panels andsculpture. And the hull meetin'-house is so beautiful, that it wuzremarked that "it ort to be kep' in a glass case. " Inside, the ceiling is one hundred and thirty-five feet high--goodland! I told Josiah I wuz glad I did not have to whitewash or paper itoverhead, for it 'most killed us Methodist Episcopal sisters to paperour meetin'-house ceilin' which wuz only twenty feet high, and put ahundred and fifteen feet on top of that and where would we be, wenever could done it in the world. The interior is full of statutes andpictures by Michael Angelo and other great sculptors and famouspainters. The Campanile or bell tower near it is most three hundred feet high, and a beautiful view is to be seen from the top way off onto thefur-off mountains, the city and the valley of the Arno, or that is Ihearn so; I didn't climb up myself to see, bein' more'n willin' totake Dorothy's word and Robert Strong's to that effect. The bronze doors in the Baptistry are a sight to see. Michael Angelosaid they wuz worthy to be the gates of paradise, but I could tell Mr. Angelo, and would if he had said it to me, that he little knew howbeautiful them gates are and we ortn't to compare anything earthly to'em. Jest think, Mr. Angelo, I'd say, of an immense gate being madeof one pearl, the idee! we can't hardly git into our heads any ideeshere below, and never will till the winds of heaven blow aginst ourtired senses and brighten 'em up. But I wuzn't neighbor to Mr. Angelo; he died several years before Iwuz born, four or five hundred years before, so of course I couldn'tadvise him for his good. He lost a sight and never knowed it, poorcreeter! The Ufizzi and Pitti galleries contain enough pictures and statutes tomake 'em more'n comfortable, I should think; beautiful pictures andbeautiful statutes I must say. One of the most interestin' things tome in the hull collection wuz the original drawings of the old masterswith their names signed to 'em in their own handwritin'. It wuz likeliftin' up the mysterious curtain a little ways and peerin' into thepast. Michael Angelo's sketches in chalk and charcoal; Titian'sdrawings, little buds, as you may say from which they bloomed intoimmortal beauty; Rubens, Albert Durer and a throng of others. And thenthere wuz the autograph portraits of the great painters, Guido, Rembrandt, De Vinci, Vandyke, Raphael, and also the greatest works ofall these painters. It wuz a grand and inspirin' sight never to beforgot. Robert Strong and Dorothy wanted to see the statute of Dante;they set store by his writings. It is a splendid statute of whitemarble riz up in the Piazza Sante Croce; I hearn 'em talkin' about itsbein' on a piazza and spozed it wuz built on some stoop and mistrustedhe deserved a better pillow. But it wuzn't on the piazza of a house, it wuz out-doors, and thepedestal wuz over twenty feet high, all covered with carvin's of seenstook from his "Divinia Commedia, " and some lions, and the arms ofItaly, and things. It wuz a good-lookin' statute, better lookin' asfur as beauty goes than Dante himself; he wuz kinder humbly I alwaysthought, but then, I spoze, he didn't always wear that wreath on hishead; mebby he looked better in a beaver hat or a fur cap. 'Tennyrate, Thomas J. Always sot store by him. It wuz a noble statute, more'nfifty feet high, I presoom, with two figures standin' on each side andone on top. The one on the left seemed to have her hand outstretchedtelling to all the world just how Dante wuz used whilst he wuz alive, and the one on the right had just throwed herself down and wuz cryin'about it, and Dante, settin' on top, wuz leanin' his hand on his headand meditatin'. What his meditations wuz, I don't know, nor Josiahdon't. Mebby he wuz thinkin' of Beatrice. Thomas J. Had read Dante's books a sight to his pa and me. "The DivineComedy, " "The Inferno, " "Bernadiso, " "New Life, " etc. , etc. ThomasJefferson thought "The Divine Comedy" a powerful work, showing thestory of how a man wuz tempted, and how sorrow lifts up the soul tonew hites. I never approved of his praisin' up Beatrice quite so much under thecircumstances, and I dare presoom to say that he and Gemma (hispardner) had words about it. But then I couldn't hender it, it havin'all took place five or six hundred years before I wuz born. Robert Strong said that his writings wuz full of eloquence, wit andpathos. His native land sets great store by his memory, though theyacted in the usual genteel and fashionable way, and banished andpersecuted him during his life. One thing he said I always liked. Hewuz told he might return to his country under certain pains andpenalties, but he refused and said: "Far from a preacher of justice to pay those who have done him wrongas a favor. Can I not everywhere behold the mirrors of the sun andstars? Speculate on sweetest truths under any sky. " Robert Strong said his poetry wuz far finer in the original. And I said, "Yes, he wuz very original, for Thomas Jefferson alwayssaid so. " He is buried in Ravenna, and the Florentines have begged for his ashesto rest in Florence. If when they burnt up some of his books to showtheir contempt of him they had done as they wanted to, dug up his bodyand burnt it, there wouldn't have been any ashes to quarrel about, forof course scornin' him so they would have cast his ashes to the winds. But now they worship him when his ear is dead to their praise, thegreat heart silent that their love would have made beat with ecstasy. Well, such is life. They treated Tasso just about the same who writ"Jerusalem Delivered, " they imprisoned him for a lunatic, and now howmuch store they set by him. And I had these same thoughts, only more extreme ones, as we stood inthe cell of that noble preacher of righteousness and denouncer of sin, Savonarola. He wuz so adored by the populace, and so great a crowdpressed to see him to kiss his robe and applaud him, that he had tohave a guard. And then this same adoring crowd turned against him, imprisoned him for heresy, tortured him, burnt him to the stake. Andwhen he stood on the fagots, which wuz to be his funeral bed of flame, and the bishop said to him: "I excommunicate you from the church militant, " he answered: "Thoucanst not separate me from the Church Triumphant. " A great life and a great death. I thought of this a sight as I lookedon his tomb. I sot store by Mr. Savonarola. In the Church of Sante Croce we see the tomb of Machiavelli, a verywise, deep man and a wise patriot, but a man lied about the worst kindby them that hate liberty; the tomb of the poet, Alfieri, with Italyweepin' over it; the tombs of Michael Angelo and Galileo; the motherof the Bonapartes, and many, many others. Galileo's monument wuz asizeable one, but none too big for the man who discovered thetelescope and the motion of the earth. But just as the way of theworld is because he found new stars and insisted that the earth didmove, his enemies multiplied, he wuz persecuted and imprisoned. I sotgreat store by him, and so did Robert Strong, and I sez to him, "Robert, you too are discovering new and radiant stars in your Cityof Justice and proving that the world does move. " And I gin a queerlook onto Miss Meechim and sez: "I hope you won't be persecuted for it. " Miss Meechim looked some like her sirname with the last letter changedto n. But to resoom: The galleries of Florence contains pricelesspictures and statuary, so many of 'em that to enjoy them as youshould, and want to, would take years. Why, in the hall of Niobe Iwanted to stay for days to cry and weep and enjoy myself. I took mylinen handkerchief out of my pocket to have it ready, for I laid outto weep some, and did, the mother's agony wuz so real, holdin' onechild while the rest wuz grouped about her in dyin' agony. One of thesons looked so natural, and his expression of despair and sufferin'wuz so intense that Arvilly said: "I believe he drinked, his face shows a guilty conscience, and his malooks jest as the mother of drunkards always looks. " I told her that the death of Niobe's children wuz caused by envy andjealousy, which duz just such things to-day as fur as they dast allthe way from New York to Jonesville, and so on through the surroundin'world. Sez I, "Apollo and Diana killed 'em all just because Niobe hadsuch beautiful children and so many of 'em and wuz naterally proud andhad boasted about 'em some, and Apollo and Diana didn't want their malooked down on and run upon because she had only two children, andprobable their ma bein' envious and jealous sot 'em up. " But Arvilly wouldn't give up; she said a ma would always try to coverup things and insisted on it to the last that she should alwaysbelieve they drinked and got into a fight with Latony's boy and girl. "No, " sez I agin, "it wuz Envy and Jealousy that took aim and did thisdretful deed. " Josiah sez: "Why didn't Ni-obe keep her mouth shet then?" Well, it wuz vain to enjoy deep emotions in the face of suchpracticality. I put up my handkerchief and moved off into anotherroom. Besides pictures, these galleries contain rare gems of art in bronze, crystal, precious stones, coins, arms, helmets, etc. , etc. Enough as Isay to keep one's mind rousted up and busy for years and years. Dorothy said she couldn't leave Florence without seeing the housewhere Elizabeth Barrett Browning lived and writ her immortal poems andI felt jest so; I felt that I must see the place sanctified by herpure spirit and genius. So Robert Strong got a carriage and tookDorothy and me there one fine afternoon. A plate let into the front ofthe house tells where she lived in body. But in sperit she inhabitedthe hull world, and duz now. Her home is in the hearts of all who lovepure and exalted poetry. Here she lived her happy life as the wife of Robert Browning andmother of her boy. Here she passed on up to the higher school, forwhich she had prepared her sweet soul below, graduated in the earthschool and promoted up to the higher one above. I had a sight of emotions here and Robert and Dorothy quoted from herall the way back to our tarven, and so I did. I thought more of suchpoems as "Mother and Poet, " and "The Sleep, " etc. But they quoted asight from "Geraldine's Courtship" and "Portuguese Songs, " for soevery heart selects its own nutriment. Their young hearts translatedit into glowing language I mistrusted, though I didn't say nothin'. From Florence we went to Rome. I had read a sight about Rome and howshe sot on her seven hills and from her throne of glory ruled theworld. But them hills are lowered down a good deal by the hand ofTime, just as Rome's glory is; she don't rule the world now, fur fromit. There is in reality ten hills, but the ruins of old Rome--the Rome ofJulius Cæsar--has filled in the hollers a good deal and the new cityhas grown old agin, as cities must, and I, and Josiah, and everybodyand everything. Robert Strong had writ ahead and got us some comfortable rooms in atarven on the Corso. When Robert Strong first spoke on't Josiah lookedagitated. He thought it wuz a buryin' ground. But it didn't haveanything to do with a corse. The Corso is one of the finest streets in Rome, and handsome shops areon each side on't, and carriages and folks in fine array and them notso fine are seen there. Most all of the big crowd wuz dressed as theydo in Jonesville and Paris and London, though occasionally we metItalians in picturesque costooms. There are three hundred and eighty Catholic meetin'-houses in Rome, quite a few on 'em dedicated to the Virgin Mary, and lots of costlygifts are laid on her altar. But the one I wanted to see and so didthe rest of our party wuz the one that stood on the spot where oncethe circus of Nero stood, weak, mizable creeter. The most agreeableactin' to him and his cruel pardner wuz the death struggles of martyrsand bloodshed and agony. What a inspiring idee it is to think that right on that very spot, that bloody pagan pleasure house of hissen is changed into the biggestmeetin'-house in the world. Of course we had seen St. Peter's from adistance ever since we'd got nigh the city, and we sot out the verynext mornin' after we got there, to see it at clost view. Now I had thought, comparin' it to the Jonesville meetin'-house, whichI guess is about fifty by sixty feet, and will, on a pinch, set fourhundred and fifty, and comparin' that with the cathedral in New York Ihad thought that that Catholic Cathedral in New York was about as biga meetin'-house as a minister could handle easy; but the area of thatis forty-three thousand, whilst St. Peter's at Rome is two hundredand twelve thousand. The difference these figgers make in the two meetin'-houses is biggerthan my writin' can show you, no matter how big a pen I use or howblack my ink is. As I stood in St. Peter's Church in Rome I had a great number ofemotions and large, very large in size. Right here where Mr. Nero (themean, misable creeter) got hilarious over the dyin' struggles of theChristian martyrs, right here where St. Peter met his death with theglory of heaven lightin' up his dyin' eyes (I am just as sure on't asif I see it myself) stands this immense meetin'-house. Three hundred years of labor and sixty millions of dollars have beenexpended on it and the end is not yet. But I would not done it for acent less if I had took the job, I couldn't afford it nor Josiahcouldn't. Why, when we stood in front on't I didn't feel no bigger than the headof a pin, not a hat pin or a shawl pin, but the smallest kind theymake, and Josiah dwindled down so in size as compared to the edificethat I 'most thought I should lose him right there with my eyes gluedonto his liniment. You go through a large double door which shuts up behind you asnoiselessly and securely as if you wuz walled in to stay. My firstfeelin' after I entered wuz the immensity of the place. Some of thestatutes you see that didn't look so big as Josiah, when you comeclost up to 'em you found wuz sixteen feet high. And the littlecherubs holdin' the shell of holy water at the entrance you see aresix feet high. You look fur down the meetin'-house as you look downthe road into a big piece of woods, only here the distant trees turninto statutes and shrines and altars and things. Fur off like distantstars shinin' down into the forest you see the lamps, one hundred andtwelve of 'em, burnin' day and night around the tomb of St. Peter. As you stand under the dome and look up it is like looking at the veryruff of the sky. It is supported by four great pillars and theinterior of the immense globe is one hundred and thirty-nine feet incircumference measured on the inside. All the houses in Jonesville could be piled up on top of each other inthis immense space and Zoar and Shackville piled onto them and nothalf fill it. As we stood under the great dome the canopy over St. Peter's tombseemed to us no bigger than the band stand in Jonesville. But when wegot up to it we see that it wuz 'most a hundred feet high, for fur upthe mosaic medallions of the four evangelists lookin' none too big forthe place come to examine 'em, the pen of St. Luke is six feet longand his nose is big enough for a spare bedroom. The writing that runsalong under the dome each letter is six feet high, higher than ThomasJefferson on tip toes, or Josiah on stilts. The idee! I don't spoze that Peter, that earnest, hot-tempered fishermanever spozed he would have such a buildin' erected to his honor, andI wondered as I looked through the immense distances of thismeetin'-house how many turned their thoughts from the glory about 'emonto Peter's inspired words when he wuz here in the flesh. Thishuge pile seemed as if Time could have no power over it, but hisown words rung in my ear: "The day of the Lord shall come as a thief in the night and allthese things shall be dissolved. Nevertheless we according to hispromise look for a new heaven and a new earth wherein dwellethrighteousness. " And as I thought of his death right here on this very spot agin hiswords sounded in my heart: "Beloved, think it not strange concerning this fiery trial which is totry you--But rejoice--Partakers of Christ's suffering--" And even as I listened to the chantin' of the priests I methought Iheard Peter speaking of the Voice which come down from Heaven whichthey heard who wuz with Him on the mount. I thought of the sure wordof prophecy. "The light shining in a dark place"--"Until the daydawns and the day star arise in our hearts. " Yes, the real Peter wuz enshrined in my heart as I trod the grandaisles of that meetin'-house of hisen, and I didn't think nothin' atall in comparison of that statute of Peter settin' on a white stunthrone holdin' his foot out for the masses to kiss. He sets up there with a queer lookin' thing on his head. Josiah saidit wuz a sass pan, and I sez: "No, Josiah, it is a halo. " And he sez: "Samantha, if I'm ever sculped and sot up in the Jonesvillemeetin'-house, I don't want any halo on my head. " And I told him I guessed there wuzn't any danger of his ever wearin' ahalo on this earth. And Josiah said before the subject wuz broached that never, nevershould he kiss that toe. And he sez it to me in reproachful axents asif I'd been teasin' him to. But I hadn't thought on't and told him so. But right whilst we stood there we see folks of all classes frompeasants to nobles and of all ages from childhood to old age walk upand kneel and kiss that onconscious big toe and go into some chapelcountin' the beads of their rosaries. Good land! Peter don't care anything about that mummery unless he haschanged for the worse since he left this mortal spear, which hain'tvery likely bein' the man he wuz. And as I thought of the evil thingsdone in the name of the power that rared up that figger, I methought Ihearn him say: "The time has come when judgment must begin at the house of theLord. " I had lots of emotions as I walked to and fro and didn't want to talkto anybody or hear the talkin' round me. I hearn Tommy talkin' sunthin' to Carabi and I catched these words, "Iwonner, oh, I wonner what good it duz 'em to kiss that toe. " AndArvilly and Josiah jined in in sharp criticism. And agin Josiah sez:"I know I am a leadin' man in Jonesville and have been called more'nonce a pillar in the meetin'-house, but never, never do I want to bemade a statter with a sass pan on my head, and the bretheren andsistern kissin' my toes. " And agin I sez, "It hain't a sass pan. " But they kep' on to thatextent that I had to say, "Josiah and Arvilly, the one that figgerrepresents, said: 'Above all things have charity, for charity covers amultitude of sin. '" Miss Meechim and Dorothy and Robert Strong clumb clear up into thedome twice as high as Bunker Hill monument or ruther walked up forthey hain't stairs, but a smooth wooden way leads up, up to that hite. Miss Meechim told me when they come down that though there wuz a highrailin' it seemed so frightful to look down that immense height shedidn't hardly dare to look off and enjoy herself, though the view wuzsublime. But I can't describe St. Peter's no more than a ant can describe theZodiac, I mean an a-n-t, not mother's sister. Why, the great sidechapels are big enough for meetin'-houses and fur grander than weshall ever see in Jonesville or the environin' townships. And the tomband monuments and altars, etc. , are more gorgeous than I could evertell on if I should try a year. There wuz one statute by Canova of Clement XIII that is lovely, themarble figure of the pope and on each side kneelin' figures ofReligion and Death. Down below as if guardin' the tomb stands twonoble lions. And Pope Innocent, I d'no whether his name agreed with his nater ornot, but he sets there holdin' the lance that pierced the side of ourLord, so they say. But I don't believe that it wuz the same one norRobert Strong don't; I should have had different feelin's when Ilooked at it if it had been the one. Besides this relic they claim to have at St. Peter's a piece of thecross and the napkin that wuz laid to our Lord's face when he wuzfaintin' under the burden of the cross, and that still holds theimprint of his face, so they say. They are shown on sacred days. Theysay that there is confessionals at St. Peter's where folks of everylanguage in the world can confess and be absolved by a priest thatunderstands 'em. Well, I shouldn't wonder, it is big enough, it seemslike a world in itself. But I couldn't help thinkin' of our great HighPriest whose confessional is broad and high as the needs and sorrowsof a world and the "silent liftin' of an eye can bring us there tobe, " and who understands not only every language under the sun, butevery secret and hidden thought and aspiration of the soul, good orevil, and whose forgiveness and compassion never fails the penitentsoul. I couldn't help thinkin' on't, and I felt that St. Peter if hecould speak would say, "Josiah Allen's wife, I don't blame you foryour methinkin', I think just so myself. " One day we all went to see the Arch of Titus; it wuz big and massivelookin' with a lot of writin' over the top that I couldn't read norJosiah couldn't, but interestin' like all the remains of imperial Romethat ruled over almost the hull of the known world. It was erectedabout the year 70 to commemorate the destruction of Jerusalem. There wuz another arch fur more interestin' to me, and that wuz thearch of Constantine. It is perfectly beautiful, and would be, even ifit wuz built by a misable pagan. But it wuz built by Mr. Constantinewhen he declared himself in favor of Christianity. I sot store byhim. It is a grand and beautiful structure, richly ornamented, and hasthree passages. I didn't like all the base reliefs on it; indeed, Iconsidered some on 'em as real base, such as Mr. Tragan's offerin's tothe gods, etc. But then I realized that I wuzn't obleeged to look at'em. And some on 'em wuz very good showin' off Mr. Tragan educatin'poor children, etc. And some of Constantine's doin's there I likedfirst-rate. And I d'no as I see anything in Rome that interested me more than thetomb of Celia Crassus--Celia Matella that wuz. It is a round, massivestructure that stands on the Appian Way and is about two thousandyears old. It wuz once all covered with costly marble, but the hand ofTime and other thieves, in mortal shape, have stole it a long timeago. But enough is left to show what it wuz. Nobody knows jest whoCelia wuz and what she did do, or didn't do, to git such a monument. But I shall always believe she wuz a real likely woman and smart. 'Tennyrate, I said her pardner must have thought high on her andmourned her loss like a dog or he never would have rared such amagnificent tomb to her memory. But Arvilly looked at it different. She said she believed her husbanddrinked and got led off into all sorts of sins and made Celia no endof trouble and riz this monument up to smooth things over. But I sez, "Mebby things wuz different then;" but didn't really spozeso, human nater havin' capered about the same from the start. "'Tennyrate, " sez I, "I shall always believe that Miss Crassus wuzgood as gold, and this great massive monument that it seems as if thehand of Time can't ever throw down I take as a great compliment to mysect as well as Celia Crassus. " But Arvilly wuz as firm as a rock to the last in her belief that Mr. Crassus drinked and that Miss Crassus wuz broken-hearted by her griefand anxiety and tryin' to cover up her pardner's doin's as the wivesof drunkards will, and tryin' to keep her children from follerin'their pa's dretful example, and then after he'd jest killed her withthese doin's he rared up this great monument as a conscience soother. Josiah thought Celia wuz equinomical and a wonderful good cook, andher grateful pardner riz this up in honor of his blissful life withher. Miss Meechim thought that at all events she must have been genteel. Robert and Dorothy looked at its massive walls, and I hearn him saysunthin' to her kinder low about "how love wuz stronger than time ordeath. " But Tommy just wonnered at it, wonnered who Celia Matella wuz, how shelooked, how old she wuz, if she had any little boys and girls. He jestwonnered and nothin' else, and in the end I did, too. You have no idee till you see how big the Colosseum is. It is as longas from our house to she that wuz Submit Tewksberry's, and so on roundby Solomon Gowdey's back agin. You may not believe it, but it is true, and I d'no but it is bigger. It used to accommodate one hundredthousand people in its palmy days, or so I spoze they called it, whensome time durin' one season five thousand beasts would be killed therefightin' with human bein's, hull armies of captives bein' torn topieces there for the delight of them old pagans. Fathers bein' made tokill their wives and children right there for their delight. Oh, how I wished, as I told Arvilly, I could git holt of Mr. Titus andMr. Nero and some of the rest of them leadin' men. The conqueror, Mr. Titus, brought back twelve thousand of theconquered Jews and made 'em work and toil to build up that lofty archin memory of their own defeat and captivity and his glory. You'd thinkthat wuz enough trouble for 'em, but I've hearn, and it come prettystraight to me, that he misused 'em more or less while they wuzworkin' away at it. 'Tennyrate, they say a Jew won't go under that arch to this day andthey've been seen to spit at it, and I spoze they throw things at itmore or less on the sly. Sez I, "I'd gin 'em a piece of my mind if I knowed they would make mefight with a elephant the next minute. " Arvilly thought that if she could sold them the "Twin Crimes" it mighthave helped 'em to do better, but I d'no as it would. But that greatamphitheatre where the blood and agony of the martyrs cried toheaven, was afterwards dedicated to these Christian martyrs. There areeighty arches of entrance. Only a part of the immense circular wall isnow standing, but you can see what it wuz. There are four stories ofarches, one hundred and fifty-seven feet high in all, the arena itencloses is two hundred and eighty-seven feet long. Dorothy and Robert Strong and Miss Meechim went and see it bymoonlight, and they say that it wuz a more beautiful sight than wordscan describe. But I bein' a little afraid of the rumatiz, thought thatI had better go by broad daylight, and Josiah did, too. I mistrustedthat Robert and Dorothy beheld it by a sweeter and softer light thaneven the Italian moonlight, but I kep' in and didn't speak mymistrustin'. I dast as soon die as gin vent to any such idee beforeAlbina Meechim. We went one day to see the Pantheon, built by Mr. Agrippa, 27 B. C. Itis a dretful big buildin'; I guess about the biggest ancient buildin'in the world. It has had its ups and downs, shown out in brilliantbeauty, been stole from and blackened by the hand of Time, but it isstill beautiful. It wuz dedicated to Jupiter at first, and afterwards to the Virgin andthe Christian martyrs, afterwards it was dedicated to all the saints. In speakin' on this subject, Josiah said: "What a lot of saints theydo have in these furren countries, " and says he to me, _soto vosy_, "I'd kinder like, Samantha, to get that name; Saint Josiah would soundwell and uneek in Jonesville. " But I scorfed at the idee, though knowin' that he wuz jest as worthyto be called saint as a good many who wuz called by that name. But Josiah is dretful ambitious. When we wuz lookin' at the differentpictures of the popes in their high hats, sez he: "How becomin' such a hat would be to me. I believe I shall be took inone when I get home; I could take Father Allen's and Father Smith'sold stove-pipe hats and set my best one on top, and then cut out awooden cross on top; how uneek it would be. " But I spoze he will forgit it before he gits home--I hope so'tennyrate. CHAPTER XXX The Vatican where the Pope keeps house is the biggest house in theworld; its dimensions are one thousand one hundred and fifty-one feet, by seven hundred and sixty-seven feet. And if you want to realize thesize of such a buildin', you jest try to frame it and you'd find out. Why, as I told Josiah, Joel Gowdey is called our best carpenter inJonesville, but if he should try to plan that buildin', where would hebe? He is a great case to scratch his head in difficulties, Joel is, and I guess he'd be pretty bald before he got through studyin' on it, much less doin' the work. It has twenty courts, two hundredstaircases, and 'leven thousand rooms. Josiah worried some about it, and sez: "What duz one old man want of 'leven thousand rooms? He can't be inmore'n one to time, and if he tried to go round and see if his hiredhelp kep' 'em swep' up and mopped and the winders cleaned, it wouldkeep him on the go the hull time and be too much for him. " But I told Josiah that Mr. Pope didn't make use of the hull buildin'his own self, but there wuz libraries in it and museums and picturegalleries. I believe myself Mr. Pope is a real likely man, of whichmore anon. I don't believe that there is a room in the U. S. Or thehull surroundin' world so grand and magnificent as the Great Hall ofthe Vatican Library. It is over two hundred feet long, and glorious inarchitecture and ornaments from top to bottom. It contains the mostpriceless treasures in books and manuscripts. For hundreds of yearsthe collection has been constantly growing by purchase, gifts andconquests. One of its choicest treasures is the Bible of the fourthcentury. The picture galleries in the Vatican contain pictures and statutesenough, it seems to me, to ornament the parlors of the world if theywuz divided up. And the museum--I don't spoze there is so big acollection in the world of such rare and costly things, and I spozelike as not there will never be another one so large and valuable. Inever should try it, nor Josiah wouldn't. It would be too big a tug onour strength, if we had oceans of money, and can no more be describedthan I could count the sands of the sea and set 'em in rows. We thought one day we would visit the Pantheon. Miss Meechim didn'treally want to go on account of her conscience partly, and I too feltsome as she did, for it wuz a pagan temple riz up to all the godstwenty-seven years before Christ. But finally we all did go. As I toldMiss Meechim, we could keep up a stiddy thinkin' on better things, ifwe wuz lookin' on pagan shrines. She said she wuz afraid that Rev. Mr. Weakdew wouldn't approve of herbeing there, and she didn't seem to enjoy herself very much and I d'noas I did. But it must have been a glorious place as fur as beauty isconcerned in its prime, for it is beautiful in its ruin. There are nowindows, but it has a large circular openin' in the ruff through whichI spoze the smoke of sacrifice ascended, not much, I believe, abovethe figures that used to stand up there fifty feet above the marbleand porphry pavement--Mars, Jupiter, Apollo, Minerva, Vulcan, etc. , etc. For all everything has been stole from this gorgeous temple thatcould be, it is grand-lookin' and beautiful now. From the Pantheon we went to the Capitol--the Capituline Hill wherejustice wuz meted out to the public from kings and nobles. We went safely past the two huge lions at the foot of thestaircase--though Tommy got behind me when he first saw them--past thespot where Rianzi wuz killed. Here we see no end of statutes of theCæsars, the Popes and other influential families. We stood on thespot where Brutus made that memorable speech, and I felt that I couldalmost see that noble figger as he stood there sayin': "Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears!" If I had been there, I'd lenthim two pairs; mine and Josiah's in welcome. The bronze wolf, spoke of by Mr. Cicero, is still standin' there; andin the museum here we see no end of rich sculpture, statutes, mosaicand beautiful, rare objects of art. Pliny's doves made a noble show;they are made of little pieces of stun, one hundred and sixty piecesin an inch; I couldn't done it to save my life. The Venus of theCapitol looks beautiful; Josiah thought she favored Sally Ann Henzy, but I didn't. And, 'tennyrate, Sally Ann would have scorned to appearin company in that condition; Sally Ann is real modest. In the Pincian Garden, we see the villa of Lucullus, a brave soldierwho had his faults, but wuz a good provider and thought a site of hisvittles; he made me think of Josiah. And also we see the home of Mr. Nero--mean creeter--I wuz glad enough he passed away before I gotthere. My principles on intemperance and monopolies would have riledhim up dretful, and Arvilly's talk made him hoppin' mad. I d'no whathe would have took it into his head to do. And I never should have ginhim the freedom of Jonesville, never, he needn't thought on't; nor Inever should invited him to make a all day's visit to our house, nor aafternoon one, either. They have beautiful fountains in Rome. All of a sudden as we wentthrough a narrer street, we see a dazzlin' sheet of water come downfrom the rock shell work and statutes, clear streams of water seemedto be gushin' out on all sides, fallin' into a big reservoir bigenough for a ship to float in, and one day we went to see the Baths ofCaracella. Jest think of a bath a mile square, big enough for thirtyor forty thousand folks to bathe in at one time. It is all in ruinsnow, but you can see from the thick walls, tall arches, the sidescovered with costly mosaic, what they wuz in their glory. Josiahthought he could make a lovely piece of mosaic from the stuns down inour paster and slate stuns. He said if he could cover the front of thebarn with the pictures of his travels in stun, some like the travelsof Ulysses, it would be a boon to Jonesville. But good land! it wouldbe a sight to behold made of stuns as big as your hand and all shapes. That ambition must be squenched. Josiah breathed this aspiration to meas we went through the Hall of the Emperors. And they didn't look nobetter nor so well as the bretheren in the Jonesville meetin'-housewould if they wuz sculped and Josiah said so; though, of course, as Itold him, they wuz dressed up more fancy. And he said: "Any decentwoman would lend her nightgown for her pardner to be sculped in andhandkerchief pins and lace under-sleeves and things. " Poppea Sabina, the second wife of Mr. Nero, wuz a beautiful-lookin'woman, though I don't spoze she wuz what she should be. Her husbandkicked her to death some time ago. He ort to been kicked himself; I'dbeen willin' to hire the mule myself to done it, I wuz that put outthinkin' on't. Josiah said "Poppy Sabriny wuz the best-lookin' figger there. " Arvilly said she most knew he'd been drinkin', it wuz so fashionablefor drinkin' men to kick their wives, and sez she: "Oh, how I wish Icould have canvassed Nero for the 'Twin Crimes' before he done it. " And I sez: "It might have been a good thing for Mr. Nero and forPoppy, but I don't know how it would have been with you, Arvilly; aman that would kick his wife to death wouldn't be apt to brook abook-agent. " "Yes, " sez Josiah, "anybody that would kick Poppy Sabriny would doanything. " Sez I: "It would look just as well, Josiah, for a perfessor not totalk so much about another woman besides his pardner, even if she is astun woman. " "Jealous of a statter!" sez Josiah skornfully. "Not at all, " sez I. "But Poppea Sabina wuz a pagan, and no betterthan she should be, and her folks wuzn't likely and----" "Jest like a woman!" sez Josiah, "a man can't praise up anotherfemale, dead or alive, without his pardner picking flaws in 'em. " Well, I drawed his attention off onto the Cæsars, Augustus andDomitian, and quite a few on 'em. Nero's bust I despised lookin'at--brutal tyrant--as Josiah truly said anybody that would kill hiswife and grandmother would do anything and wuz too mean to be lookedat. If I could covered up his face I'd been willin' to used my bestcrape veil that I mourned for Mother Allen in. Nero's grandma, shethat wuz Agrepina Agrippa, wuz good featured but broken-heartedlookin'. No wonder, havin' such a grandson in the family. Arvilly saidas she looked at it, that she believed if old Miss Nero, his grandma, and his own ma had spanked him good and sound and sot him down hard inthe corner from day to day he wouldn't acted and behaved so when hegot bigger. She said she presoomed he wuz allowed to pierce flies witha pin and torter hornets and May bugs and rob birds' nests and tiecans to dogs' tails and act, and he got worse as he got bigger. And Id'no but she wuz right. I've seen the Nero sperit in small boys manytimes; why, I see it in Thomas Jefferson when he wuz little, but itwus squenched and he's come up noble. Miss Meechim wanted to see the Paletine Hill, the spot where Romulusand Remus wuz nursed by a she wolf; Josiah don't believe it. He saidno wolf would consent to bring up twins by hand, and no ma would everallow it, but that's what they say. Miss Meechim explained here howwhen the twins had growed up Romulus harnessed a heifer and bull to aplough and laid out the site of the city. Robert Strong wuz full ofmemories of Cicero, Catalus, the Gracchi, and so wuz Dorothy. But noplace interested me there so much as the Forum, where some think Paulwuz tried. He wuz tried before Nero, and there wuz Nero's judgmentplace, and there wuz the seat for prisoners. As I looked round me Icould imagine the incomparable eloquence of Paul that sways the humanheart as leaves are waved by a strong breeze, and his memory sweetenedthe hull place, and it needed it bad enough, yes indeed it did. But toresoom: One day Arvilly and I wuz takin' a walk together, Josiah and Tommybein' a little ahead, when we see a elegant carriage comin' along, arich red color all ornamented with gold, with six horses, theirgorgeous harnesses nice enough for bridal ornaments. And there wuzoutriders goin' ahead and men in brilliant uniform fallin' in behind, and lots and lots of carriages follerin' on in the procession. Therewuz a axident in front, two carriages goin' in opposite directions hadsmashed in together, and two or three fallin' over them wuz the cause. I see that in that splendid carriage right under my nose as it were, agentleman sittin' alone, dressed up in a way that would have sheddelight into the soul of Josiah Allen, and a female bystander sez, "There is the pope. " He had a bright red robe on, all covered with crosses and stars andorders, and a high peaked cap of the same color. And even as I lookedat him I thought what a beautiful stripe them clothes would make in arag carpet after he'd got through with 'em. You could see he wuz good natered and smart and about as old asSalathiel Henzy and looked like him. His benign face wuz lookin' overthe crowd as if he had a look into a better country. I liked hislinement first-rate and believe he is a likely man, and I felt that itwould encourage him to hear me say so, and also I felt that there wuzsome things that I wanted to advise him for his good. So I advanced tothe side of the carriage door and sez, holdin' out my hand in acordial way: "Good mornin', Mr. Pope; I am glad to see you lookin' so well. " Bein' took so completely by surprise, he held out his hand. They havetold me since that he meant to have me kiss it, but I never thoughton't nor shouldn't done it if I had, not bein' in the habit of kissin'strange men's hands; no, I grasped holt of it and shook it warmly justas I would Salathiel's. He riz his hand up in benediction and said some words that I couldn'tunderstand, but good ones I know from his looks, and I bent my head asreverent as I would before Elder Minkley. But as I lifted my eyes whatwuz my horrow to see Arvilly advance takin' out "The Twin Crimes" fromher work-bag and before I could interfere she had begun to canvasshim. Sez she: "Mr. Pope, I have a book here I would like to call yourattention to: 'The Twin Crimes of America: Intemperance and Greed. '"Good creeter, it wuz too bad. But it ended triumphant for Arvilly, forwhether it wuz my noble words to him that had softened him down orwhether it wuz that he knowed how rampant these two evils wuz in theUnited States and wanted to inform himself still further about it, 'tennyrate he looked the book over and said he would be glad to havethe book, and he and two more of the leadin' men nigh him in thatprocession bought books, Arvilly deliverin' 'em on the spot and takin'her money. And if the stoppage in the crowd hadn't let up and theystarted on, I d'no but she would have canvassed the hull flower of theRomish meetin'-house; though we wuz told afterwards by one whopretended to know, that it wuzn't the Pope I had talked to and Arvillyhad canvassed, but some other high dignitary in the meetin'-house. We stayed on in Rome longer than we had laid out to, for our sweetDorothy liked it there. And if she had took it into her head to setdown on a lonesome rock in mid ocean, like a mermaid, for a week, there would the rest on us be sot round her till her mind changed. For the head of our party would have managed it some way so she couldhad her way. Not that she would do anything aginst the wishes of therest of us, but she wuz happy there, and the rest of us all liked itand found plenty of things to interest us, but at last we did set outfor Naples. I had sot a good deal of store on seein' the Bay of Naples, and so hadthe other females of our party. Robert Strong had seen it before. Andmy pardner when I tried to roust up his interest and admiration byquotin' the remark so often made: "See Naples and die. " He said he wouldn't do any such thing, not if he could keep alive. "But, " sez he, "more'n as likely as not the vile Italian cookin' willbe too much for me and your prophecy may come true; I may see Naplesand die--from starvation. " But I told him it wuz the incomparable beauty of the seen that wuzmeant, that when you'd seen that you had beheld the best and mostbeautiful the world could offer you and you might as well pass awaywithout tryin' any further. And Josiah said he would ruther see the Jonesville creek down in thepaster back of the house, where it makes a bend round our sugar houseand the sugar maples grow clear down to the water's edge, and pussywillers lean down, so the pussy most touch the water, and you can seethe brook trout darting about over the clean pebbles, than to seeforty Napleses. I too felt a good deal the same, but wouldn't encourage him by sayin'so. And the Bay of Naples wuz beautiful, its beauty stole on youonbeknown and growed and growed till it possessed your hull heart andsoul, if you had a soul. It lays like a big blue liquid gem in itsencirclin' settin' of fadeless green and flashing white walls, andcrowned by the hantin' dretful beauty of Mount Vesuvius. Naples is a big city, the biggest in Italy, and as easy to git intofrom land as Jonesville is, only on its principle avenues there arewhat they call barriers where they collect duties on provisions, etc. , brought from the country. Josiah thought that would be a splendid thing for him. Sez he, "Ibelieve I shall have Ury help me and build a barrier in front of myhouse and take a tax for big loads that go by. Why, " sez he, "at acent a load I could make a splendid livin'. " But he won't try it. As I told him he might just as well lanch rightout on Jonesville creek as a corsair, "and I've always said, " sez I, "that never would I live on brigandage. " Some of the streets of Naples are narrer and noisy as Bedlam withmarket men and women cryin' out their wares and all sorts of streetnoises. Little donkeys carryin' loads fur too big for our old mair. Asort of a big loose bag hangs on each side on 'em piled up as high asthey will hold with fruit, vegetables, flowers, etc. Sometimes you will see such a big load walkin' off and can't for yourlife tell what propels it till bime by you will hear a loud bray fromunderneath. It sounds quite scareful. The little ridin' wagons of thepoor people are packed too as I never see a hoss car in the U. S. Sometimes you will see more'n two dozen folks, priests, soldiers, men, women and children, and sometimes baskets full of vegetables andbabies swingin' underneath and all drawed by a donkey; it hain't rightand I wanted to talk to 'em about it, but didn't know as they wouldhear to me. But our old mair is used fur different. The Cathedral is quite a noble lookin' buildin' and contains tombs ofmany noted people, Pope Innocent, King Andrew, Charles I. Of Anjou, and many, many others. The Piazza del Municipio has a beautifulfountain, and there is one fashionable promenade over two hundred feetwide containing all sorts of trees and shrubs where you can see theNeopolitans dressed in fine array. There is a terrace extending intothe sea, temples, winding paths, grottos, etc. The Piazza del Plebiscito has an equestrian statute that wuz taken inthe first place for Napoleon, then changed to General Murat andfinally to Charles III. It made me think considerable of the dailypapers who use one picture for all social and criminal purposes, andfor Queen Victoria and Lydia Pinkham. Some of the principal streets are straight and handsome, with blocksof lava right out of the bosom of the earth for pavement. It give mequeer feelin's to tread on't thinkin' that it come from a place waydown in the earth that we didn't know anything about and thinkin' whatstrange things it could tell if stuns could talk. Some of the beststreets had sidewalks. It is well lighted by gas. As you walk along the streets you see rich and poor, beggar andpriest, soldier and peasant, every picturesque costoom you can thinkon and all sorts of faces. But there seems to be a kind of ahappy-go-lucky air in 'em all, even to the beggars and the littlelazy, ragged children layin' in the sunshine. The people live much outof doors here, you can see 'em washin' and dressin' the children, anddoin' housework, and everything right from the street, and though Idon't spoze the poor suffer so much here on account of the warmclimate, yet dirt and rags and filth and vermin didn't look any betterto me here than they did in Jonesville. In Naples as a rule the lower parts of the houses are shops, restaurants, etc. , and the upper stories are used for dwellings. Thebeautiful terraces of the city and the flat roofs of the houses arecovered with shrubs and flowers, and filled with gayly dressedpromenaders, givin' it a gay appearance. And you don't see in thefaces of the crowd any expression of fear for the danger signal thatsmokes up in the sky, no more than our faces to home show signs of ourrealizin' the big danger signals on our own horizon. I d'no as I ever had hearn of the third city that wuz destroyed whenHerculaneam and Pompeii wuz. But Vesuvius did put an end to anothercity called Stabea at that time, most two thousand years ago, but thatis some years back and I d'no as it is strange that the news hadn'tgot to Jonesville yet. Naples has three hundred meetin'-houses, enough you would say to makethe citizens do as they ort to. But I don't spoze they do. I hearn, and it come quite straight, too, that it is a dretful city for folksto act and behave, though it used us real well. It has a good many theatres and has a large museum where I would beglad to spent more time than I did. Dretful interestin' to me wuz therich frescoes and marbles dug up in the buried cities. Just to thinkon't how long they stayed down there under the ground, and now comeout lookin' as well as ever whilst the Love or the Ambition thatcarved the exquisite lines have gone away so fur that we can't foller'em; way into some other planet, mebby. Bronze statutes, the finestcollection in the world they say, and all sorts of weapons, Etruscianvases, coins, tablets, marbles, ornaments of all kinds enough to makeyour head feel dizzy to glance at 'em. Some of the statutes I didn't want Josiah to see; they wuzn't dresseddecent to appear in company, but then agin I knew he wuz a perfessorand had always read about the Garden of Eden and Eve when she and Adamfirst took the place and wuz so scanty on't for clothes, but I didn'tlike their looks. Miss Meechim thought they wuz genteel and called ithigh art, and Josiah, for a wonder, agreed with her; they hardly everthink alike. But I sez, "Josiah Allen, while I am a livin' woman, and a Methodistsister, you never will be sculped with nothin' but a towel hung overone arm, not even a paper collar on, and, " sez I, "what should wethink to go into a photograph gallery to home and see Sister Bobbettand Sister Gowdey portrayed with a little mosquiter nettin' slung overone shoulder?" Sez I, "It would be the town's talk and ort to be--youcan call it high art, Miss Meechim, if you want to, but I shall alwayscall it low art. " Miss Meechim murmured sunthin' about its bein' genteel, and Josiahlooked round and didn't pay the attention to my earnest words that heort to. I believe they did for a spell shet up them statters of Venus, but they had let 'em out agin when we wuz there. There wuz one statterof a woman with the top of her head and her arms off. Josiah said tome: "The idee of puttin' that poor cripple in here amongst decent lookin'wimmen; if they pictured her at all they ought to pictured her asbein' carried to a hosspital. " Miss Meechim wuz nigh by and I see she had gone almost into spazzumsof admiration over it, and on our family's account, didn't want tofall too low down in her estimation, so I wunk at him and whispered, "Josiah, that is the celebrated Sikey; it is the proper thing to fallinto extacies of admiration and wonder when you see it. " And I as Isay not wantin' to demean myself any further before Miss Meechim, putup my two hands in an attitude of wonder, but which she could take foradmiration if she wanted to, but I didn't say it wuz. But Josiah sez, "Catch me a praisin' up a no armed female, one who hasbeen scalped, too, in the bargain. " I hope Miss Meechim didn't hear him. She always praised just what wuzproper to praise, she always read in her guide book just what sheought to admire and then proceeded to admire it to once. As sheboasted her mind wuz a eminently conservative and genteel mind. As for me my mind and sperit loved to grope around more and find outthings to praise and blame by rote and not by note, and Dorothy andRobert Strong was some so. Arvilly wuz more bent on disseminatin' her books to help and instruct, and would have canvassed Michael Angelo himself for the "Twin Crimes, "turning her back onto his most wonderful creations. As for Josiah, awild goat leapin' through museums and picture galleries couldn't havebeen more scornful of contemporaneous judgment exceptin' when hetried to be fashionable. Dear little Tommy would wander round with his arms clasped behind himunder his velvet jacket and wonner at things to himself, and I spozeCarabi walked up and down beside him though we couldn't see him. Sometimes I felt kinder conscience smitten to think I couldn'thonestly admire what seemed to be the proper thing to, and then agin Ikinder leaned up agin the memory of John Ruskin and how he liked inart what he did like, and not what it was fashionable to, and I feltcomforted. One day, tired out with sightseein' and havin' sunthin' of a headache, I stayed to home while all the rest of the party went out and MissMeechim invited me into their settin'-room as it wuz cooler there, soI had sot there for some time readin' a good book and enjoyin' my poorhealth as well as I could, when a card wuz brung in for Robert Strong. I told the hall boy that he wuz out but wuz expected back soon, and ina few minutes he come back usherin' in a good lookin' man who said hewuz anxious to see him on business and that he would wait for him. Iknowed him from his picture as well as his card; it wuz Mr. Astofeller, a multi-millionaire, who had got his enormous wealth fromtrusts and monopolies. I couldn't go back into my room for Josiah had the key, and so weintroduced ourselves and had quite a agreeable visit, when all of asudden right whilst we wuz talkin' polite and agreeable two longstrings dangled down in front of the eyes of my soul, strings I hadoften clung to. Well I knowed 'em, and I sez to myself almost wildly: Oh, Duty! must I cling to thy apron-strings here and now, enjoyin' asI do poor health and in another woman's room? For reply, them stringsdangled down lower yet, and I had to reach up the arms of my speritand gently but firmly grip holt on 'em and stiddy myself on 'em whilstI tackled him on the subject of monopolies, having some hopes I couldconvert him and make him give 'em up then and there and turn round andbe on the Lord's side. And bein' so dretful anxious to convince him, I begun some as the M. E. Ministers sometimes do in a low, still voice, gradually risin'higher and deeper and more earnest. I told him my idees of trusts andmonopolies and what a danger I thought they wuz to individual andnational life. And I described the feelin's I felt to see such drovesof poor people out of work and starvin' for the necessaries of life, whilst a few wuz pilin' up enormous and onneeded wealth, and I sez: "Mr. Astofeller, what good does it do to heap up such a lot of moneyjest to think you own it and hide it from the tax collector? And bringup your daughters to luxury and foolish display, their gole being togive you a titled son-in-law who will bend down toward you from hiseminence jest fur enough to reach your pockets, and if you refuse tohave them emptied too many times you will anon or oftener have yourdaughter returned to you, her beauty eat up by sorrow, her earstinglin' and heart burnin' with experiences a poor girl would neverknow. And bring up your sons to idleness and temptation, when youknow, Mr. Astofeller, that it is Earnest Toil, wise-headed, hard-handed step-ma, that goads her sons on to labor and success. Andit is not, as a rule, the sons of millionaires who are our great men. It is the sons of Labor and Privation that hold the prizes of lifeto-day and will to-morrow. " And sez I, reasonable: "What is the use, Mr. Astofeller, of so muchmoney, anyway? You can't ride in but one buggy at a time, or wear morethan one coat and vest, or sleep on more than one bed and threepillers at the outside, or eat more than three meals a day with anycomfort, so why not let poorer folks have a chance to eat one meal aday--lots of 'em would be tickled to death to. "Our Lord said: 'Take no thought for the morrow what ye shall eat orwhat ye shall drink;' and He must have meant that the time wuz comin'when juster laws should prevail, when Mammon should yield to Mercy andplunder changed to plenty for all and no burden of riches for any. TheBible sez that in those days when the pure influence of Jesus stillrested on his disciples that they had everything in common. " Sez Mr. Astofeller, "Start ten men out rich Monday morning, and nineof them would be poor Saturday night, and the tenth one would own themoney of all the rest. " And I sez: "I presoom so, if they had their own way, and that is a bigargument to prove that there ought to be a wise head and a mercifulhand at the hellum to look out for the hull on 'em. A good father andmother with a big family of children takes care of the hull on 'em. And if one is miserly and one a spendthrift and one a dissipator andone over-ambitious they watch over 'em and curb these different traitsof theirn and adjust 'em to the good of all and the honor of their paand ma. They spur on the indolent and improvident, hold back thegreedy and ambitious, watch and see that the careless and good-natureddon't git trod on, nor the strong make slaves of the weaker. Thefeeble are protected, temptations are kept out of the way of thefeeble wills; the honest, industrious ones hain't allowed to perishfor want of work they would gladly do, and the strong, keen-wittedones hain't allowed to steal from the onfaculized ones. Why, how itwould look for that pa to let some of his children heap up more moneythan they could use, whilst some of the children wuz starvin'? Itwould make talk and ort to. " Mr. Astofeller said, "Millionaires are very charitable; look at theirgenerous gifts on every side. " And I sez, "Yes, that's so; but Charity, though she's a good creeterand well thought on, hain't so good as Justice in lots of places. " He sez, "We give big gifts to the churches. " And I sez, "Yes, I know it; but do you think that the Lord is goin' tothink any better on you for raisin' up costly temples sacred to theLord who specially said in his first sermon that he had come topreach the Gospel to the poor, give sight to the blind, set at libertythem that are bound? As it is you rare up magnificent temples and hireeloquent clergymen to preach the doctrine that condemns you if theypreach the Bible, which a good many on 'em do. For you must rememberwhat it sez: "If you who have plenty give not to your brother in need, how dwelleththe love of God in you? And if you have two coats and your poorerbrother has none, you ort to give him your second best one. And youkneel down on your soft hassocks and pray all your enormous, needlesswealth away from you, for you pray, 'Thy kingdom come, ' which you knowis the kingdom of love and equality and justice, and 'Thy will be doneon earth as it is in heaven, ' when you know that God's will is mercy, pity and love. And 'Give us our daily bread, ' when you must know thatyou are takin' it right out of the mouths of the poor when you aremakin' your big corners on wheat and meat, and freezin' the widder andorphan when you make your corners on coal. " Sez I, "Look at Robert Strong's City of Justice. Love, peace andhappiness rains there. Every workman is content, for he has his payfor his labor and a fair percentage on profits. If the factory isprosperous the workman knows that he gets just as much accordin' forthe work he puts in as if he owned the hull thing, and it is for hisadvantage to give good work and help it along all he can. "Intemperance is not allowed to show its hoof and horns inside thatcity, for that would be injustice to the weak-willed and theirfamilies. Greed and plunder and the whiskey power has to stay outside, for the Bible sez without are dogs. "Robert Strong might wring all the money he could from these workmen, wrop himself in a jewelled robe and set up in a gold chair and lookdown on the bent forms of the poor, sweating and groaning and strikingand starving below him. But he don't want to. He is down there rightby the side of 'em. Capital and labor walking side by side some likethe lion and the lamb. He has enough for his wants, and they haveenough for their wants, and there is mutual good-will there and peaceand happiness. Hain't that better than discontent and envy anddespair, bloody riots and revolutions? Cold, selfish, greedy Capitalclutching its money-bags, and cowering and hiding away from starvin'infuriated strikers. " Sez I, growin' real eloquent, "Monopoly is the great American brigandhid in the black forest of politics. It has seized Labor in itsclutches and wrings a ransom out of every toiler in the land. "Monopoly steals out of Uncle Sam's pocket with one hand and with theother clutches the bread-money out of the tremblin' weak fingers ofthe poor. Is our law, " sez I, "a travesty, a vain sham, that a manthat steals millions for greed goes unpunished, while a man who stealsa loaf to keep his children from starvin' is punished by our laws andscorfed at? Monopoly makes the poor pay tribute on every loaf of breadand bucket of coal, and the govermunt looks on and helps it. Shame!shame that it is so!" Sez Mr. Astofeller, "Where would the world be to-day if it wuzn't forrich people building railroads, stringing telegraph and telephonewires, binding the cities and continents together?" "Yes, " sez I, "I set store by what they've done, just as I do on themgood old creeters who used to carry the mails in their saddle-bags forso much a year. Folks felt tickled to death, I spoze, when they couldsend a letter by somebody for 10 cents a letter. And it wuz a greatimprovement on havin' to write and send it by hum labor, a boy and aox team. But when I see Uncle Sam can carry 'em for two cents and onecent a-piece, why I can't help favorin' the idee of givin' Uncle Samthe job. And if he can carry letters so much cheaper why can't hecarry packages at just the same reduced rate, and talk over the wires, etc. , etc. ? "Not that I look down on them saddle-bags--fur from it--I honor 'emand I honor the rich men that have cut iron roads through continents, mountain and abyss, honor them that have made talkin' under the oceanpossible and through the pathless air. Yes, indeed, I honor 'em fromnearly the bottom of my heart. But I would honor 'em still more ifthey should now all on 'em stand up in a row before Uncle Sam, andsay, We have done all we could to help the people (and ourselves atthe same time), and now as we see that you can help 'em still morethan we can, we turn our improvements all over into your hands to usefor the people, for you can make travel jest as much cheaper as lettercarryin', and do it just as peaceable. Why, what a stir it would makeon earth and in heaven, and Uncle Sam would see that they didn't loseanything by it. He'd see jest what a grand thing they wuz doin', andpay 'em well for it. And these rich men, instead of leavin' theirwealth in bags of greenbacks for moth and rust and lawyers to corrupt, and fightin' heirs to break through their wills and steal, would leaveit in grateful memories and a niche in history where their beninefaces would stand up with all the great benefactors of the race. Hain't that better, Mr. Astofeller, than to leave jest money for afashionable wife and golf-playin' sons to run through?" Mr. Astofeller said he believed it wuz better; he looked realconvinced. And seein' him in this softened frame of mind I went on andbrung up a number of incidents provin' that the great folks of thepast had held a good many of my idees in regard to wealth. I remindedhim of Mr. Cincinnatus who did so much to make Rome glorious, when thepublic sought him out for honors (he not a-prancin' through thecountry with torch-light processions and a brass band, talkin' himselfhoarse, and lavishin' money to git it), no indeed, when they soughthim for a candidate for public honors they found him a not fixin' upthe primarys and buyin' bosses, but ploughin' away, just as peaceableas his oxen, workin' on his own little farm of four acres. He wuzsatisfied with makin' enough to live on. Live and let live was hismotto. "And Mr. Regulus, the leader of the great Roman forces, wuz satisfiedwith his little farm of seven acres, creepin' up a little in amountfrom four to seven. But it wuzn't till long, long afterwards that therich grew enormously rich and the poor poorer, and what a man had wuzhonored instead of what he wuz. Over and over the drama has beenplayed out, moderation and contentment, luxury and discontent, revolution and ruin, but I did hope that our republic, havin' morewarnin's and nigher the millenium, wouldn't go the same old jog trotup, up--up, and down, down, down. I wuz some in hopes they would hearto me, but I d'no. " I could see that Mr. Astofeller wuz greatly impressed by what I said. I see he took out his watch a number of times, wantin' to see, Imistrusted, the exact minute that I said different things. He wuz jestlike the rest of them millionaires, a first-rate lookin' and actin'creeter when you git down to the real man, but run away with byAmbition and Greed, a span that will take the bits in their mouth anddash off and carry any one further than they mean to be carried. Hedidn't say so right out but he kinder gin me to understand that I'dconvinced him more'n a little. And I am lookin' every day to see himmake a dicker with Uncle Sam (a good-hearted creeter too as ever livedUncle Sam is, only led away sometimes by bad councillors), yes, Iexpect he will make a dicker with Uncle Sam for the good of the publicand hasten on the day of love and justice. I am lookin' for it andprayin' for it; in fact the hull world is prayin' for it every daywhether they know it or not when they pray "Thy kingdom come. " But to resoom: Robert Strong and Josiah come back almost simeltaneously, and I don't know what Mr. Astofeller's bizness wuz with Robert, sunthin'about California affairs, I guess, mebby politics or sunthin'. But'tennyrate, if it wuz anything out of the way I know he would never getRobert to jine in with him. CHAPTER XXXI From Naples we went to Athens, Dorothy wantin' to see Greece while shewas so nigh to it, and Robert Strong wantin' just what she did everytime. And Miss Meechim sayin' that it would be a pity to go home andnot be able to say that we had been to what wuz once the most learnedand genteel place in the hull world. "Yes, " sez Josiah, "I'd love to tell Elder Minkley and the brethernI'd been there. " And Miss Meechim went on to say that she wanted to see the Acropolisand the Hall of the Nymphs and the Muses. And Josiah told me that "they wuz nobody he had ever neighbored withand didn't know as he wanted to. " I guess Miss Meechim didn't hear him for she went on and said, "Athenswuz named from Athena, the goddess Minerva. " And Josiah whispered to me "to know if it wuz Minerva Slimpsey, Simon's oldest sister. " And I sez, "No, this Minerva, from what I've hearn of her, knew morethan the hull Slimpsey family, " sez I. "She wuz noted for her wisdomand knowledge, and I spoze, " sez I, "that she wuz the daughter ofJupiter. " Josiah said Jupiter wuz nobody he ever see, though he wuz familiarwith his name. And I'd hearn on him too when Josiah smashed hisfinger or slipped up on the ice or anything, not that I wanted to inthat tone. Arvilly thought mebby she could canvass the royal familyor some on 'em, and Tommy wuz willin' to go to any new place, and Ispoze Carabi wuz too. And I said I wanted to stand on Mars' Hill, where Paul preached to the people about idolatry and theirworship of the Unknown God. As we sailed along the shores Dorothyspoke of Sapho. Poor creeter! I wuz always sorry for her. You knowshe wuz disappointed, and bein' love-sick and discouraged she writsome poetry and drownded herself some time ago. And Robert Strong talked a good deal to Dorothy about Plato and Homerand Xenophon and Euripides, Sophocles, Phidias, and Socrates--and lotsmore of them old worthies; folks, Josiah remarked to me, that hadnever lived anywhere round Jonesville way, he knew by the names. AndDorothy quoted some poetry beginning: "The isles of Greece, the isles of Greece. " And Robert quoted some poetry. I know two lines of it run: "Maid of Athens, ere we part, Give, O, give me back my heart. " But his eyes wuzn't on Athens at all. They wuz on Dorothy, and herface flushed up as rosy a pink as ever Miss Sapho's did when she wuzkeepin' company. After we left the boat we rode over a level plain with green trees bythe wayside till we reached Athens and put up at a good tarven. Athens, "The eye of Greece, " mother of arts and eloquence, wuz builtin the first place round the Acropolis, a hill about three hundredfeet high, and is a place that has seen twice as many ups and downs asJonesville. But then it's older, three or four thousand years older, Ispoze, and has had a dretful time on't since Mr. Theseus's day, takeit with its archons or rulers, kings and generals, and Turks, Gothsand Franks, etc. But it become the fountainhead of learning and civilization, cultureand education of the mind and the body. In that age of health andbeauty, study and exercise, the wimmen didn't wear any cossets, consequently they could breathe deep breaths and enjoy good health, and had healthy little babies that they brought up first-rate as furas the enjoyment of good health goes, and Arvilly said she knew theydidn't drink to excess from the looks of their statutes. Athens also claims to be one of the birthplaces of Homer, that goodold blind poet. Robert Strong talked quite a good deal about hispoems, the Iliad and the Odyssy or the return of Ulysses Odysses tohis native land. Josiah paid great attention to it, and afterwards he confided to methat he thought of writin' a Jodyssy or the return of Josiah toJonesville. He said when he recounted all his wanderin's andtribulations on the road and at tarvens with starvation and tightclothes and all the other various hampers he'd been hampered with hesaid that it would beat that old Odyssy to nothin' and nobody wouldever look at it agin. "Why, " sez he, "jest think how old that is, mosta thousand years B. C. It is time another wuz writ, and I'm the one towrite it. " But I shall try to talk him out of it. He said he shouldn't begin ittill our return to Jonesville, so Ury could help him in measurin' thelines with a stick. And when I am once mistress of my own cook-stoveand buttery I have one of the most powerful weepons in the world tocontrol my pardner with. I hain't no great case to carry round relics, but I told Josiah that Iwould give a dollar bill quick if I could git holt of that old lanternthat Diogenes used to carry round here in the streets in broaddaylight to find Truth with. How I'd love to seen Mr. Diogenes andasked him if he ever found her. Josiah said he would ruther own his wash-tub that he used to travelround in. And which he wuz settin' in when Alexander the Great askedhim what costly gift he could bestow on him. And all that contented, independent creeter asked for wuz to have the king not git between himand the sun. He snubbed Plato, too; didn't want anything, only his tub and hislantern and hunt round for a honest man, though I don't see how he gotround in it. But Josiah sez the tub wuz on castors, and he had a ideeof havin' our old washtub fixed up and go to Washington, D. C. , in itwith our old tin lantern, jest to be uneek and hunt round there for anhonest man. Sez I middlin' dry, "You may have to go further, Josiah. " But I shan'tencourage him in it. And our wash-tub wouldn't hold him up anyway; thehoops had sprung loose before I left home. At the southwest of Athens is the Mount Hymettus. I'd hearn a sightabout its honey. Josiah thought he would love to buy a swarm of beesthere, but I asked him how could he carry 'em to Jonesville. He saidthat if he could learn 'em to fly ahead on us he could do it. But hecan't. The road west wuz Eulusas, the Sacred Way. And to the north wuz theAcademy of Plato, and that of Aristotle wuz not fur away. One day Isee there on an old altar, "Sacred to either a god or goddess. " Theybelieved in the rights of wimmen, them old Pagans did, which showsthere is good in everything. And how smart Socrates wuz; I always sot store by him, he wuz a goodtalker and likely in a good many ways, though I spoze he and his wifedidn't live agreeable, and there might have been blame on both sidesand probable wuz. How calm he wuz when on trial for his life, and whenhe had drunk the hemlock, sayin' to his accusers: "I go to death and you to life; but which of the twain is better isknown only to Divinity. " And Mr. Plato; don't it seem as if that old Pagan's words wuzprophetic of Christ when he spoke of an inspired teacher: "This just person must be poor, void of all qualifications savevirtue. A wicked world will not bear his instructions and reproofs. And therefore within three or four years after he begun to preach heshould be persecuted, imprisoned, scourged, and at last put todeath. " Hundreds of years after, Paul preaching the religion of Christ Jesus, met the Epicurians and Stoics representing Pleasure and Pride. Strongfoes that religion has to contend with now. Then he addressed themultitude from the Areopagus, Mars' Hill. What feelin's I felt; how real and nigh to my heart his incomparablesermon that he preached in that place seemed to be as I stood there. Ithought of how the cultured, beauty-loving nature of Paul must havebeen affected by his surroundings as he stood there in the midst ofstatutes and altars to Apollo, Venus, Bacchus. The colossial goldenfigure of Minerva, holdin' in her outstretched right hand a statute ofvictory, four cubits high. So big and glorious-lookin' Minerva wuzthat her glitterin' helmet and shield could be seen fur out to sea. The statute of Neptune on horseback hurling his tridant; the temple toCeres and all the gods and goddesses they knew on and to the UnknownGod. Here Paul stood surrounded by all these temples so magnificentthat jest the gateway to 'em cost what would be ten million dollars inour money. Here in the face of all this glory he stood up and declared that thetrue God, "Lord of heaven and earth dwelt not in temples made withhands. " And he went on to preach the truth in Christ Jesus:repentance, remission of sin, the resurrection of the dead. Somemocked and some put him off by saying they would hear him again ofthis matter. They felt so proud, their glory and magnificence seemedso sure and enduring, their learning, art and accomplishments seemedso fur above this obscure teacher of a new religion. But there I stood on the crumbling ruins of all this grandeur and art. And the God of Paul that they had scorned to "feel after if haply theymight find him, " wuz dominating the hull world, bringing it to theknowledge of Christ Jesus: "The gold and silver and stone wrought bymany hands" had crumbled away while the invisible wuz the real, thetruth wuz sure and would abide forever. How real it all seemed to meas I stood there and my soul listened and believed like Dionysos andDamarus! The market place wuz just below Mars' Hill, and I spoze the peopletalked it over whilst they wuz buyin' and sellin' there, about astrange man who had come preachin' a new doctrine and who had asked tospeak to the people. It sez, "His heart was stirred within him and hetaught them about the true God" in the synagogue and market-place. Aswe stood there in that hallowed spot, Miss Meechim said: "Oh, that I had been there at that time and hearn that convincin'sermon, how glad would I have left all and followed Him, like Dionysosand Damarus. " "Well, I d'no, " sez Arvilly, "as folks are any more willin' now to lettheir old idols of Selfishness and Mammon go and renounce the faultsand worship the truth than they wuz then. " Miss Meechim scorfed at the idee, but I pondered it in my own mind andwondered how many there really wuz from Jonesville to Chicago, fromMaine to Florida, ready to believe in Him and work for the Millenium. But to resoom. The Patessia is a beautiful avenoo, the royal familydrive there every day and the nobility and fashionable people. TheGreek ladies wear very bright clothing in driving or walking. The roadlooks sometimes like a bed of moving blossoms. As in most every place where we travelled, Robert Strong met someonehe knew. Here wuz a gentleman he had entertained in California, and hegave a barbecue or picnic for us at Phalareum. A special train tookthe guests to it. There wuz about thirty guests from Athens. The tablewuz laid in a pavilion clost to the sea shore covered with vines, evergreens and flowers. Four lambs wuz roasted hull and coffee wuzmade in a boiler, choice fruits and foods were served and wines forthem that wanted 'em. It is needless to say that I didn't partakeon't, and Josiah, I'm proud to say, under my watchful eyes, refused tolook on it when it wuz red, and Arvilly and Robert Strong and Dorothyturned down their glasses on the servant's approach bearin' thebottles. Everything wuz put on the table to once and a large piece of bread toeach plate. No knives or forks are used at a barbecue. We hadsweetmeats, rose leaf glyco, oranges and all kinds of fruit. The waythey roast a lamb at a barbecue--two large lambs are placed about fourfeet apart, the lamb pierced lengthwise by a long pointed stick ishung over the bed of live coals. They turn and baste it with olive oiland salt and it is truly delicious. One pleasant day we visited the King's country place. The dining roomwuz a pavilion in a shady spot under orange trees full of fruit andblossoms surrounded with a dense hedge of evergreens, vines andblossoms. There wuz walks in every direction bordered with lovelyflowers. The Queen's private settin' room is a pretty room, thefurniture covered with pink and white cretonne, no better than mylounge is covered with to home in the spare room. And in a littlecorner, hid by a screen of photographs wuz her books and writing desk. The maids of honor had rooms in a little vine covered cottage nearby. We of course went to see the ruins of the Parthenium, built byPericles and ornamented with the marbles of Phidias. It wuz finishedabout four hundred and thirty years B. C. And cost about four millionsof our money. A great Bishop once said: "This was the finest edifice on the finest site in the world, hallowedby the noblest recollections that can stimulate the human heart. " It stands on the highest point of the Acropolis and wuz decorated bythe greatest sculptor the world ever saw. It stands on the site of anolder temple to Minerva. They thought a sight of that woman. It mademe feel well to see one of my sect so highly thought on though I didnot approve of their worshippin' her and I would never give my consentto be worshipped on a monument, not for the world I wouldn't--no, indeed! Robert Strong wanted to go to see the ruins of the enormous temple ofJupiter where chariot races were run and the Olympic games wuz foughtthat Paul speaks of so many times in his letters to the churches. But time wuz passin' fast away and we thought best to not linger thereany longer and we went directly from there to Vienna, a longer journeythan we had took lately, but Robert thought we had better not stop onthe way. Vienna is a beautiful city. I d'no as I would go so fur as theViennesse myself and say it is the most beautiful in the world, but itstands up high amongst 'em. The beautiful blue Danube makes a curve round it as if it wuz realchoice of it and loved to hold it in its arms. I say blue Danube, butits waters are no more blue than our Jonesville creek is pink. Butmebby if I wuz goin' to sing about the creek I might call it blue orpink for poetical purposes. We had rooms nigh to the river, the banks of which wuz terraced downto the water, and laid out in little parks, public gardens full offlowers and trees and flowering shrubs. There are two massive stun bridges in this part of the city, and veryhandsome dwellin' houses, churches, and the Swartzenburg palace. Thebuildings are very handsome here, more lofty and grand looking eventhan they are in Paris, and you know you would imagine that wuz theflower of the universe, and I needn't mention the fact that I had togin into it that it goes fur beyend Jonesville. The street called the Ring Strasse, I spoze because it curves roundsome like a ring, is three milds long, and most two hundred feet wide. And along this broad beautiful avenue there are six rows of largechestnut trees. A track for horseback riders on one side, a broadcarriage driveway, two fine promenades, besides the walk. Splendid buildin's rise up on each side of this grand street, andparks and gardens abound. At intervals there are large roomy lawns, covered with velvety grass, where easy seats under the trees inviteyou to rest and admire the beauty around you, and the happy, gayly-dressed throng passing and repassing in carriages, on horsebackor walkin' afoot, thousands and thousands on 'em, and everyone, Ispoze, a pursuin' their own goles, whatever they may be. The first place we went to see wuz St. Stephen's Church. This is on astreet much narrower than the Ring Strasse. The sidewalks wuz verynarrer here, so when you met folks you had to squeeze up pretty nighthe curbstun or step out into the carriage way; but no matter howclose the quarters wuz you would meet with no rough talk orimpoliteness. They wuz as polite as the Japans, with more intelligenceadded. St. Stephen's Cathedral is a magnificent Gothic structure, threehundred and fifty-four feet long and two hundred and thirty broad, andis full of magnificent monuments, altars, statutes, carving, etc. , etc. The monument to the Emperor Frederic III. Has over two hundredfigures on it. Here is the tomb of the King of Rome, Napoleon's only son, and his ma, Maria Louise. I had queer feelin's as I stood by them tombs andmeditated how much ambition and heart burnin' wuz buried here in thetomb of that young King of Rome. I thought of how his pa divorced thewoman he loved, breakin' her heart, and his own mebby, for theambitious desire to have a son connected with the royalty of Europe, to carry on his power and glory, and make it more permanent. And howthe new wife turned away from him in his trouble, and the boy died, and he carried his broken heart into exile. And the descendant of theconstant-hearted woman he put away, set down on the throne of France, and then he, too, and his boy, had to pass away like leaves whirledabout in the devastatin' wind of war and change. What ups and downs! Ihad a variety of emotions as I stood there, and I guess Josiah did, though I don't know. But I judged from his liniment; he looked realdemute. The catacombs under this meetin'-house are a sight to see I spoze, but we didn't pay a visit to 'em. Josiah had a idee that they wuzbuilt to bury cats in, and he said he didn't want to go to any catburyin'-ground. He said there wuzn't a cat in Europe so likely asourn, but he wouldn't think of givin' it funeral honors. But he didn't git it right. It wuz a place where they buried humanbein's, but I didn't care anything about seein' it. Robert got a big carriage, and we all driv over to the Prater, a mostbeautiful park on an island in the Danube. The broad, flower-borderedavenues wuz crowded with elegant carriages and beautiful forms andfaces wuz constantly passing hither and yon, to and fro, and the sceneall round us wuz enchantin'ly beautiful. We had a delightful drive, and when we got back to the tarven we found quite a lot of lettersthat had been forwarded here. Josiah and I had letters fromJonesville, welcome as the voice of the first bird in spring, all welland hopeful of our speedy meetin'; but Miss Meechim had one tellin' ofdretful doin's in her old home. We'd heard that there had been a great labor strike out in California, but little did we know how severe it had struck. Rev. Mr. Weakdew hadwrit to Miss Meechim how some of the rebellious workmen had riz upagainst his son in his absence. He told how wickedly they wuz actin'and how impossible it wuz in his opinion to make them act genteel, buthe said in his letter that his son had been telegrafted to to comehome at once. He said Mudd-Weakdew always had been successful inquelling these rebellious workmen down, and making them keep theirplace, and he thought he would now as soon as he arrived there. I know Arvilly and Miss Meechim had words about it when she read theletter. Miss Meechim deplored the state of affairs, and resentedArvilly's talk; she said it was so wicked to help array one classaginst another. "They be arrayed now, " sez Arvilly. "Selfishness and Greed are arrayedaginst Justice and Humanity, and the baby Peace is bein' trompled onand run over, and haggard Want and Famine prowl on the bare fields ofPoverty, waitin' for victims, and the cries of the perishin' fill theair. " Arvilly turned real eloquent. I mistrusted mebby she'd catched it fromme, but Miss Meechim turned up her nose and acted dretful high-headedand said there was nothing genteel in such actions and she wouldn'tgin in a mite till that day in Vienna she had a letter that broughther nose down where it belonged, and she acted different after readin'it and didn't talk any more about gentility or the onbroken prosperityof the Mudd-Weakdews, and I wuz shocked myself to hear what wuz writ. As I say, Miss Meechim read it and grew pale, the letter dropped inher lap and she trembled like a popple leaf, for it told of a dretfultragedy. It wuz writ by a friend in Sacramento and the tragedy wuzconcernin' the Mudd-Weakdews. On hearin' of the strike, theMudd-Weakdews had hurried home from their trip abroad and he had triedto quell the strike, but found it wouldn't quell. He had been shot atbut not killed; the shot went through his eyes, and he would be blindfor life. A deadly fever had broke out in the tenements on the streetback of his palace, caused, the doctors said, by the terribleonsanitary surroundings, and helped on by want and starvation. Thefamilies of his workmen had died off like dead leaves fallin' fromrotten trees in the fall. The tenements wuz not fur from theMudd-Weakdew garden where Dorris loved to stay, who had stayed at homewith a governess and a genteel relative during her parents' absence. The garden wuz full of trees, blossoms and flowering shrubs, afountain dashed up its clear water into the air and tall whitestatutes stood guard over Dorris in her happy play. But some deadlygerm wuz wafted from that filthy, ghastly place, over the roses andlilies and pure waters, and sweet Dorris wuz the victim. The clear waters and fresh green lawns and fragrant posies didn'textend fur enough back; if they had her life might have been saved, but they only went as fur as the sharp wall her pa had riz up andthought safely warded his own child from all the evils of the lowerclasses. No, it didn't go fur enough back, and sweet Dorris had to pay thepenalty of her pa's blindness and selfishness. For what duz the Booksay? "The innocent shall suffer for the guilty. " Her broken-hearted mother followed her to the grave, and it wuz onthat very day, Mudd-Weakdew bein' shut up with doctors, that thelittle boy wuz stolen. The discharged workman, whose little boy haddied of starvation, disappeared too. He wuz said to be half-crazy andhad threatened vengeance on his old employer. There wuz a story thathe had been seen with a child richly dressed, and afterwards with achild dressed in the coarse clothing of the poor, embarking on aforeign ship, but the clue wuz lost, so the living trouble wuz worseto bear than the dead one. The strike wuz ended, Capital coming out ahead; the workmen had lost, and the Mudd-Weakdews had a chance to coin more money than ever out ofthe half-paid labor and wretched lives of their men. They could stillbe exclusive and foller the star of gentility till it stood over thecold marble palace of disdainful nobility. But the wall of separationhe had built up between wealth and poverty had not stood the strain;Deadly Pestilence, Triumphant Hatred and sharp-toothed Revenge hadclumb over and attacked him with their sharp fangs, him and his wife, and they had to bear it. I knowed it, I knowed that no walls can ever be built high enough toseparate the sordid, neglected, wretched lives of the poor and theluxurious, pleasure-filled lives of the rich. Between the ignorantcriminal classes and the educated and innocent. You may make 'emstrong as the Pyramaids and high as the tower of Babel, but thepassions and weaknesses of humanity will scale 'em and find a waythrough. The vile air of the low lands will float over into and contaminate thepure air of the guarded pleasure gardens, and the evil germs willcarry disease, crime and death, no matter how many fountains and whitestatutes and posies you may set up between. Envy, Discontent andRevenge will break through the walls and meet Oppression, Insolenceand Injustice, and they will tear and rend each other. They alwayshave and always will. Robert Strong, instead of buildin' up that wall, spends his strength in tearin' it down and settin' on its crumblin'ruins the white flowers of Love and Peace. Holdin' Oppression and Injustice back with a hard bit and makin' 'embehave, makin' Envy and Hatred sheath their claws some as a cat willwhen it is warm and happy. He tears down mouldy walls and lets thesunshine in. Pullin' up what bad-smellin' weeds he can in the gardensof the poor, and transplantin' some of the overcrowded posy beds ofthe rich into the bare sile, makin' 'em both look better and dobetter. I set store by him. But to resoom: CHAPTER XXXII Amongst my letters wuz one from Evangeline Noble tellin' of her safearrival in Africa and of the beginning of her work there, some likestrikin' a match to light a lamp in a dark suller, but different fromthat because the light she lit wuz liable to light other lamps, and soon and on and on till no tellin' what a glorious brilliance wouldshine from the one little rushlight she wuz kindlin'. She felt it, shewuz happy with that best kind of happiness, doin' good. She spoke ofCousin John Richard, too; he wuz not in the same place she wuz, butshe hearn of him often, for his life wuz like a vase filled with theprecious ointment broke at the feet of Jesus. Broken in a earthlysense, but the rich aroma sweetened the whole air about and ascendedto the very heavens. A missionary she knew had seen him just before she wrote me. He wuzworking, giving his life and finding it again, useful, happy, beloved. Not a success in a worldly way; Mudd-Weakdew would havecalled it a dead failure. In place of a palace, Cousin JohnRichard could not call even the poor ruff that sheltered him his own. Instead of a retinue of servants, Cousin John Richard workeddiligently with his hands to earn his daily bread; instead ofstocks and bonds bringing him rich revenues, he had only the titledeeds of the house of many mansions, and Mudd-Weakdew would nothave accepted any deeds unless signed before a notary and sealed withour govermunt stamp. No wealth, no luxuries, not hardly thenecessities of life had Cousin John Richard, whilst Mudd-Weakdewwuz steeped in the atmosphere of wealth and grandeur for which hehad lived and toiled, yet Cousin John Richard wuz blissfully happyand content, Mudd-Weakdew unspeakably and hopelessly wretched. Bothhad follored their goles and wuz settin' on 'em, but, oh! howdifferent they wuz--how different to themselves and them about 'em. Inspiration and help flowed from Cousin John Richard's personalitylike the warm sunshine of a clear June day, or the perfume from a rarelily, brightening, sweetening and uplifting all about him, whilst fromMudd-Weakdew fell a dark shadder made up of gloom, discontent, envy, hatred. How different they wuz, how different they wuz! And RobertStrong's gole, how different his wuz from Mudd-Weakdew's. Imethought of what Miss Meechim had said to me deplorin'ly, howdifferent Robert Strong wuz. Yes, indeed! both on 'em had had furdifferent goles and pursued 'em. The onselfish road Robert Strong trodwuz leadin' him to the house of happiness--Mudd-Weakdew's to thehouse of pain and despair. I dare presoom to say I eppisoded more'n a hour to myself about it andto Josiah, 'tennyrate Josiah got real huffy and acted, and sez in apitiful axent: "Samantha, I'm willin' to hear preachin' twice a week and can setunder it like a man, but it comes kinder tough to have moralizin' andpreachin' brung into the bosom of the family and liable to be drizzledout onto me week days, and any time, night or day. " His axent wuz extremely hopeless and pitiful. He felt a good deal as Idid in the matter, but it is a man's nater to be more impatient andnot bear the yoke so well as wimmen do. Wimmen are more used togaldin' things than men be; I don't blame Josiah. I wuz glad enough to see in Vienna the stately monument to MariaTheresa, Empress of Austria Hungary. To see all about her and belowher the noble forms of Wisdom, Strength, Justice and Religion. And mena-hoss back and sages and soldiers and to see her a-settin' so calmand benine on top of the hull caboodle, it gin me proud sensations andmade me glad I wuz a woman, but not haughty. Maria Theresa wuz a likely woman; I wish she could have lived to haveme encourage her by tellin' her what I thought on her. I would said toher: "Marie, " sez I, "you did well with what you had to do with, yourpardner left a sight for you to tend to, as pardners will if they seetheir consort is willing to bear the brunt. You went through no end oftrials and tribulations, wars and revolutions, but come offvictorious. You helped the poor a sight, abolished torture, sot upschoolhouses, fenced in the roarin' Papal bulls so they couldn't breakout and rare round so much, you helped on the industries of yourcountry, looked out for the best interests of your husband and son, aspardners and mothers will and looked and acted like a perfect ladythrough it all in war and peace. " It would done Marie sights of good to hearn my talk, but it wuzn't tobe. But this high, noble monument wuz some consolation to her if shecould look down and see it, as I spoze she can and duz. And partly onher ma's account I visited the tomb of her girl, Marie Christina. Itwuz designed by Canova and wuz the most beautiful tomb I ever see. Nine beautiful figgers with heads bowed down in grief wuz bearin'garlands of flowers to strew above the beloved head, Youth, Middle Ageand Old Age all bearin' their different garlands and seemin' to feelreal bad, even the mighty angel who guarded the open door of the tombhad his head bowed in sorrow. Way up above wuz the face of thebeautiful Arch Duchess carved in marble, with angels and cherubssurroundin' her. Josiah said if he wuz able he would love to rare sucha one up for Tirzah Ann. Sez he, "She could enjoy it durin' her lifeand if she should pass away before us it would come handy. " He thoughtthe features of the Arch Duchess favored Tirzah Ann, but I couldn'tsee it. Albert Fountain is a noble-lookin' structure rared up by FrancisJoseph in 1869. We also visited the Academy of Fine Arts, theconservatory of music, Museums of Arts and Industries, the newParliament and University buildings. The University building has onehundred and sixty thousand volumes and engravings and drawing enoughto fill up an ordinary building, the collection of manuscripts iscalled the richest in the world. The teachers in the University of Vienna number two hundred and ten, good land! enough to make a good school in themselves if anybodyknowed enough to teach 'em. In the Chamber of Treasures in theImperial Palace we see the largest emerald known to the world and theFlorentine Diamond, 133 karats big, though Josiah said when I told himon't that wuz nothin' to carrots he'd raised in his garden, but I sothim right. There wuz more than one hundred and forty thousand coinsand all sorts of minerals and a great quantity of bronzes, gems andcameos. I hated to give in, but I had to. I see cameos there that went furbeyend mine. We visited gymnasiums, public schools, institutes, colleges and more noble and interestin' edifices than I could tell youjest the names on unless I took loads of time. The principal articles of manufacture in Vienna are jewelry, clocks, kid gloves, musical instruments, shawls, silks and velvets. It issupplied with water that comes forty milds in an aqueduct and gitsthere as fresh and sparklin' as if it hadn't travelled a mild. I felt that I ort to go and see the Emperor, Francis Joseph, while Iwuz in Vienna. I knowed that if my Josiah had been took from my heartand presence as his Elizabeth had been and he'd come to Jonesville tosee the sights and look round some as I wuz doin' and hadn't come tocondole with me I should feel dretful hurt. Just to think on't, the sweet, beautiful woman that he had loved eversence she wuz a little girl in short dresses and would marry in spiteof all opposition, and who had been his confidant and closest earthlyfriend for so many long years a settin' up there by his side on thathard peak with the kodaks of the world aimed at 'em, and rejoiced inhis joy and sympathized in his sorrow, to have her struck down sosudden and to once by the hand of a assassin. Why, if it had been myJosiah I couldn't have bore up as Fritz had; it seems to me as if Inever could have held my head up at all after it. But Fritz had bore up under his sorrow all these years and carryin' italong he bore also the load of his people's cares and perplexities andtried to do the best he could with what he had to do with, which is agolden rule to frame and hang up over our soul's mantletry piece andstudy from day to day and which is the very best a human creeter cando in Jonesville or Austria. I sot store by him. One thing specially I always liked in him wuz hishumility and reverence, as showed by the foot-washing in the palace. I'd hearn about that, and wanted to see it myself, like a dog, but itwuz too late, for that takes place in April. But Robert Strong wuzhere once in April, and witnessed that ceremony. It is a old custom, comin' from so fur back that nobody knows whatmonarch it wuz and whose feet they wuz, and whether they neededwashin' or not. But I presoom they wuz middlin' clean; they be nowanyway, and the Emperor doesn't do it for bathin' purposes or to helpcorns, but it is a religious custom. Robert explained it all out to meso plain that I almost seemed to see it myself. Robert said that the day he wuz here there wuz twelve old men, some on'em ninety years old, seated at a table set out handsome with gooddishes, napkins, etc. , and the table all covered with rose leaves, andunder it brown linen cushions for the old feet to rest on. The old men had on black clothes, short breeches, black silkstockings, and wide white turned-down collars. They wuz seated bygrand court officials, the oldest man seated at the head of the table. Anon the Emperor come in in full uniform, with a train of nobility andbig court officers with him, all in gorgeous attire, and the Emperortook his place at the head of the table as a waiter to wait on theoldest old man. And then follered twelve palace officials, eachbearin' a black tray that had four dishes of good food on it, and theytook their places opposite the old men who set on one side of thetable, some as they do in pictures of the Last Supper or some as wehave some times in cleanin' house and things tore up and we all set onone side of the table. Then all bein' ready, the Emperor took the food off the tray oppositethe oldest man, and waited on him jest as polite as Philury waits onme when we have company. The Crown Prince waited on the one next inage, and each of the old men wuz waited on by some grand duke or othermember of the Austrian nobility. After the trays wuz emptied, the palace guard, in full uniform, comein with twelve more trays, and so on till four courses wuz served, thelast consistin' of a sweet dish, fruit, cheese, almonds, etc. Afterthis, and it wuz done quite quick, for not a mouthful wuz eaten, alarge, gold tray wuz brought in with a gold pitcher on it and a largenapkin, and the Emperor knelt and poured a little water on the oldman's foot, and wiped it on the napkin. It wuzn't very dirty, I spoze;his folks had tended to that, and got off the worst of it. But he hadhad his foot washed by a Emperor, and I spoze he felt his oats more orless, as the sayin' is in rural districts, though he orten't to, seein' it wuz a religious ceremony to inculcate humility, and the oldman ort to felt it too, as well as the Emperor. But howsumever, thehull twelve on 'em had their feet washed and wiped by nobility. Andthat bein' done, the Emperor, Crown Prince, and all the arch dukes, etc. , havin' riz up from their knees, the Grand Chamberlain pouredsome water on the Emperor's hands, who dried 'em on a napkin, and allthe rest of the nobility done the same. Then a court officer come in bringin' twelve black bags of moneycontaining each thirty silver florins. They had long black cordsattached, and the Emperor fastened the bags around the necks of eachof the old men by putting the cords round their necks. Then theEmperor and nobility left the hall. All durin' this ceremony a priest and twenty assistants read andintoned beautiful extracts from the Gospel, showin' how the Lordwashed the disciples' feet. Then all the food and plates and footcushions wuz packed into baskets and sent to the houses of these oldmen, and I wuz glad to hear that, for I thought how they must havefelt to have such tasty food put before 'em and took away agin forgood and all. When the Empress wuz alive she did the same to twelve old wimmen--goodcreetur! Wuzn't it discouragin' to wash the feet of the poorer classesevery year of her life, and then be shot down by one on 'em? How Fritzmust have felt a-thinkin' on't! If he'd been revengeful, I felt thathe might have gin their feet a real vicious rub--kinder dug into 'emreal savage; but he didn't; he washed and wiped 'em honorable, fromwhat I've hearn. I always thought that that wuz a noble thing for the Emperor to do. Id'no as our presidents would be willin' to do it, and I d'no as theywouldn't. I don't believe the question has ever been put to 'em. Iguess Washington and Lincoln would anyway, and I don't believe thatthey would have shrunk back if the feet wuz real dirty; they wentthrough worse things than that. But to resoom: Robert Strong's description of this seen made me setmore store by Fritz Joseph than I had sot. And I wanted dretfully tomeet him and condole with him and congratulate him, but didn't know asI should have a chance. But to my great satisfaction we wuz allinvited to the palace to a big informal reception. I wuz tickledenough. I spoze it wuz on Robert Strong's account that we wuz invited to theEmperor's palace, though Josiah thought it wuz on his account. Sezhe: "Fritz is a educated man and reads about foreign affairs; of course, he has hearn of Jonesville and knows that I am one of its leadin' men, and wield a powerful influence in political and religious circles, andwants to honor me and on my account and to please me, and for variousdiplomatic reasons he is willin' to receive my pardner. " But it wuzn't so, no such thing; it wuz on Robert's account; Roberthad been invited there for lunch when he wuz there before, for MissMeechim had told me on't over and over. When the evening of thereception come, Miss Meechim wuz in high feather every way. She woreone in her hair that stood up higher than old Hail The Day's tailfeathers, and then her sperits wuz all feathered out, too. Dorothy looked sweet as a rose just blowed out. She had on a gown ofpale-green satin and shiffon, which looked some the color of fresh, delicate leaves, and her sweet face riz up from it and bloomed outlike a flower. It wuz a little low in the neck, which wuz white assnow, and so wuz her round arms. A necklace of big pearls wuz roundher neck, not much whiter than the warm, soft flesh they rested on, and she carried a big bunch of white orchids. She looked good enoughto frame in gold and hang up in anybody's best parlor, and RobertStrong felt just as I did I knew by his liniment. On such a occasion, I felt my best black silk none too good, and at Dorothy's request Iturned down the neck a little in front, mebby a half a finger or so, and wore a piece of lace she gin me over it that come down to my belt. It looked like a cob-web that had ketched in its transparent meshessome voylets and snowdrops. And at her request I did not wear thecameo pin, but a little bunch of posies she fixed for me, fine whiteposies with a few pale lavender ones. I spoze Dorothy, though shedidn't tell me so, for fear it would make me oneasy and nervious, butI spoze she wuz afraid that some bold thief might rob me of thatvaluable jewel; she knowed that cameo pin fell onto me from MotherSmith and fell onto her from her ma. This rim of memory sot it roundand rendered it valuable aside from its intrinsic worth, which wuzgreat. Why, I hearn that Grandmother Smith paid as high as sevendollars for it, gin five bushels of dried apples and the rest inmoney. Tommy stayed to home with Martha. The guests wuz ushered into a spacious and magnificent room. Innumerable lights flashed from its lofty ceilings and music andflowers brightened the seen. The rich costooms of the ladies and thegorgeous uniforms of the men, representatives of the differentcountries, richly embroidered in gold and silver, added to the beautyof the panorama. Jewels wuz sparklin' everywhere, and I thought tomyself I d'no but Dorothy wuz more fraid than she need be, I d'no; butI might have resked the cameo pin there. For it didn't seem as ifanybody there, man or woman, stood in need of any more ornaments, andif they took it, I should always thought they done it out of puremeanness. For such a profusion of jewelled ornaments I never see, andsuch dresses, oh, my! I thought even before I met the royal party whatwould I give if Almina Hagadone could be sot down there with libertyto bring a lot of old newspapers, the Jonesville "Augurses" and"Gimlets" and take patterns. Oh, my! wuzn't they grand, though ourgood Methodist sisters wouldn't dream of havin' their calico andwoosted dresses with such long trains draggin' behind 'em or havin''em low-necked and short sleeves. I could hardly imagine how SisterGowdey and Sister Henzy would look with their chocolate-coloredcalicos made without sleeves and dekolitay, as Miss Meechim called it;they would blush to entertain the thought, and so would theirpardners. Francis Joseph, or as I called him in my mind, the good crisp name ofFritz, I found wuz good lookin' and good actin'. Of course, likemyself and Josiah, he's gittin' some along in years. And like us, too, he won't most probable ever be hung for his beauty. But what of that?Like others lately mentioned, his liniment shows just what kind of aperson he has been and is. Honest, honorable, hard-workin', gittin'up at five o'clock in the mornin', doin' a good day's work before lotsof folks rises up from their goose-feather pillers. Fillin' up the daywith duties performed to the best of his ability. Good, solid-lookin'and good-actin' the most of the time, though I spoze that like everyhuman bein', he has had spells of bein' contrary and actin', but onthe whole a good man, and a well-wisher to his race. And now in this dretful epock of time, when everything seemedupside down, thrones tottlin' and foundations warpin', and the roar ofbattle comin' nigher and nigher on every side, I felt that it wuz agreat thing for him that he had the chance to hear some words ofencouragement and advice. Yes, I knowed that if ever the Powerswuz in a tight place they wuz now. I wuz the last one in the line, and so had a chance at him; Ishouldn't have had if Miss Meechim and Arvilly had been follerin'close to my heels. I had said in days gone by that if I ever got holtof one of them Powers I would give 'em a piece of my mind that theycould patch onto their daily experience, and tremble and wonder at itfor the rest of their days. I had been riled up by these Powers anumber of times, real provoked and out of patience with 'em. But nowwhen I stood in the presence of one of 'em I felt different from whatI thought I should feel; I pitied 'em like a dog. And I showed it. Imistrust my liniment looked pale and excited, though not havin' alookin' glass present I couldn't tell for certain, but I know my voicetrembled with emotion, for I hearn it myself. I sez to him how proud and happy I wuz to see him lookin' so well andholdin' his age to such a remarkable degree, and after a few suchpreliminary politenesses had been tended to, I branched out and toldhim with my liniment lookin' good and earnest I know, and tears almoststandin' in my eyes, I told him the feelin's I felt for the Powers, how mad I'd been at 'em in the past, and how them feelin's had turnedinto pity, for I knowed just what a ticklish place they wuz in andhow necessary it wuz for 'em to keep a cool head and a wise, religiousheart, and then, sez I, "I d'no as that will save you. You Powers havegot so hard a job to tackle that it don't seem to me you'll ever gitout of it with hull skins if you don't use all the caution a elephantduz in crossin' a bridge. Go cautious and carefull and reach out andtry every plank before you step on't. " He felt it, I could see he did, he knowed how the ground wuz quakin'under him and the rest of the Powerses. "And don't, " sez I, "don't formercy's sake! you Powers git to squabblin' amongst yourselves, for ifyou do you might just as well give up first as last, for you are alllost as sure as fate. Keep your temper above all things, " sez I. "You've got age and experience as well as I have, and it takes suchexperienced wise heads to manage such a state of affairs, and I d'noeven then as we can git along without an awful fuss, things are somuddled up. Mebby you're the very one to go on and try to straightenout the snarls in the skein of the nation's trials and perplexities, and I'll do all I can to help you, " sez I. He wuz dretful impressed by my eloquence; he acted for all the worldjust as Mr. Astofeller did. He looked at his watch just as if he wuzanxious to know just the time I said such remarkable things, and Icontinued on, "Sister Henzy, " sez I, "thinks that the millenium iscomin'. " "Sister Henzy?" sez he inquirin'ly. "Yes, " sez I, "Sister Mehala Henzy, sister in the M. E. Meetin'-houseat Jonesville. She sez that this is the great universal war that is tousher in the thousand years of peace and the comin' of our Lord. Shereads Skripter a sight and has explained it out to me and I must sayit does look like it. And oh how I do want to be here to see it, butdon't spoze Josiah and I can live a thousand years, no matter how muchpatent medicine we take, specially as we both have the rumatiz bad, but oh how I would love to. "Brother Meesick thinks this is goin' to be a war of the yellow racesagin the whites. And though it would come tough on Josiah and me to bedriv out of house and home and scalped and made slaves on, yet rightwhilst them yeller races wuz engaged in it if I could think atall--and of course I don't know how much the seat of thought issituated in the crown of the head and hair and whether the entirecitadel would go with the scalp, but if I could think and keep myconscientiousness as I spoze I should, I should have to give in rightthen and there that it wuz only justice fur the white races to submitto the revenge of the darker complected, thinkin' what we'd done tothem. "Josiah bein' so bald they would probable have to take his head rightoff, not havin' anything to hang onto while they scalped him, and Ishould probably foller him soon, as I couldn't imagine a lifeJosiahless. But whilst I lived, and even if I wuz sold into captivity, and see Thomas J. And the rest of the children sold into distantcountries, and I chained to widder Henzy, drove off west to be slavesto Hole In The Day or Big Thunder, I should have to say amidst myheart breakin' groans and sithes, it is just, it is just, we whitefolks richly deserve it for our treatment to the darker races. " The Emperor felt my talk deeply, I knew by his looks; he lookedcompletely wore out; it wuz from admiration I knowed. Sez I: "It is a dretful thing to have all the beasts of the world gitmixed up and a-fightin' and chankin' each other up, as they haveseemed to, whilst the Powers have sot and looked on. Jest now it looksto me as if the Russian Bear is gittin' the worst on't and the dragona-comin' out on top, and the Eagle has done noble work a-shriekin' andfightin' and protectin' her young. "It seemed to me and Josiah that the Powers have took things prettyeasy and loitered along when their ministers and missionaries wuzchased into a corner and the Boxers ready to take their heads off. Itmakes a sight of difference in such things whose heads are in danger. If it wuz the Powers' own heads, for instance, there would probablebeen more hustlin' round. "But things are in a dretful state in Russia and Japan and China. Itis a great pity I hadn't knowed what wuz comin' when I wuz there; Icould probable done lots of good advisin' the Empress and tryin' tomake her do as she ort to, though my pardner thinks the blame hain'tall on China. He argys wrong, but is sot on it. He sez spozen he wuzslow with his spring's work and didn't keep his fences up, or hustleround so and mebby didn't pay Ury so big wages as the Loontowners didin their factory, and wuzn't what they called sound on the doctrines. You know they are seven-day Baptisses over in Loontown and Shackville;but Josiah sez if them two Powers got together and tried to forceLoonton and Shackville civilization and ways onto Jonesville, which isa older place and glad to be kinder settled down and mind its ownbizness; and if they should try to build roads through Jonesvillemedders and berry lots and set up their tabernacles and manufacturysthere and steal right and left and divide Jonesville into pieces anddivide the pieces amongst 'em, why, sez he, 'I would arm myself andUry and fight to the bitter hind end. ' "Sez Josiah: 'Why do we want our pleasant woods and fields turned intonoisy bedlams by the whirrin' of wheels, creakin' of engines and theroar and smoke and dust of traffick? Spozein' we should make moremoney and dress better and own more books; money hain't everything inlife, nor hustlin' in bizness; peace and comfort and mindin' your ownbizness is sunthin'. ' "'And wheresoever them noisy manufactories go, there goes whiskey, 'sez Arvilly. A neighborin' woman who wuz by and jined in: 'What goodduz it do to try to settle which is the right Sunday if at the sametime them proselyters brings pizen that crazes their converts so theycan't tell Sunday mornin' from Friday midnight, bring the preachin'of love and peace and the practice of hatred and ruin, the creeds andcatechism packed on with opium and whiskey. ' "'Yes, ' sez Josiah, 'let me catch the Loontown and Shackville Powerstryin' to divide Jonesville into pieces and grabbin' the pieces anddividin' 'em up amongst 'em and turnin' us out of house and hum, Iguess them powers would find they had got hold of a Boxer when theycome to cut up my paster and divide it and the medder back of thehouse where grandfather Allen's grandpa and great-grandma lays with awhite railin' round 'em, kep' up by the Allens two hundred years. Iguess they'd think they had got holt of a Boxer--yes indeed! andJosiah Allen breathed hard and looked warlike. "'But, ' I sez, 'Josiah, you hain't got it right; there is more toit. ' "And he sez fiery red in the face and sithin' hard, 'There isgenerally more to everything. ' And I sez, 'So there is, Josiah. '" I see the Emperor lookin' round anxiously and he seemed to be on thevery pint of startin' away. I mistrusted he wanted to go and git morefolks to hear my wonderful eloquence, but I couldn't wait and I sez, "Time and Josiah are passin' away and I mustn't detain you; you Powerswill have to do the best you can with what you've got to do with. Wisdom is needed here, and goodness, piles and piles of goodness andpatience and above all prayer to the God of love and justice for help. He is the only Power that can bring light into the dark problemconfrontin' the nations. He can settle the question and will, if youPowers trust Him and try to toiler his teachin's. " "The only receipt I can give you is what I told you. Seekin' earnestlyfor patience and wisdom from on high, payin' no attention to the bluelight that rises from the low grounds lit by Greed, Ambition andRevenge, follerin' from day to day the light that filters down fromheaven through the winders of the mind and soul, and keepin' themwinders as clean as possible so the light can shine through. Brushin'away, as fur as your powers can, the black cob-webs from your owncivilizations whilst you are tacklin' the scrubbin' brush to cleanseolder and dirtier ones, and don't for mercy sake in the name offreedom take away freedom from any race or nation. I d'no what elseyou can do. " Agin he looked anxiously round as much as to say, oh why, why don'tsomebody else come to hear this remarkable talk? And sez I, "I will say in conclusion for your encouragement, fur offover the hills and dells of the world and Jonesville there will be onefollerin' you with earnest good wishes and prayers and will help youPowers all she can and may God help you and the other Powerses andfarewell. " He looked dretful relieved as he shook my hand and I passed on. Iguess he had worried for fear it would be out of sight, out of mindwith me, and I rejoined my pardner. The rest of our party had passedon into another gorgeous apartment, but my faithful pardner had waitedfor me. He wuz rejoiced to see me I knowed, though his words wuz: "What under the sun wuz you hangin' round and preachin' to a Emperorfor? I believe you would dast anything. " "I hope I would, " sez I, calmly, "upheld by Duty's apron strings. " Iwouldn't have it knowed in Jonesville for a dollar bill that rightthere in the Emperor's palace Josiah demeaned himself so, but he didsay: "I don't want to hear any more about them infarnal strings. " And a gorgeous official looked round at him in surprise and rebuke. Well, we didn't stay a great while after that. We walked round alittle longer through the magnificent rooms, and anon we met Arvilly. She wuz lookin' through a carved archway at the distant form of theEmperor and unfastenin' the puckerin' strings of her work-bag, but Ilaid holt of her arm and sez: "Arvilly, for pity sake help me find Robert and Dorothy. " She turnedwith me, and my soul soared up considerable to think I had alreadybegun to help the powers and lighten their burdens. And pretty soonthe rest of our party jined us, and we returned home to our tarven. CHAPTER XXXIII Miss Meechim wanted to visit Carlsbad, the great Bohemian wateringplace. She said it wuz a genteel spot and very genteel folks wentthere to drink the water and take the mud baths. And so we took a tripthere from Vienna. It is only a twelve-hours' journey by rail. Ourroad lay along the valley of the Danube, and seemed to be situated ina sort of a valley or low ground, till we reached the frontiers ofBohemia, but it wuz all interestin' to us, for novelty is asrefreshin' to older ones as to children. Cheerful, clean-lookin'little villages wuz scattered along the way, flourishin' orchards andlong fields of grass and grain, and not a fence or hedge to break thepeaceful beauty of the picture. Anon we entered a mountainous country with blue lakes and forests oftall pine trees and knowed we had entered Bohemia. We see gypsy tentsanon or oftener, for what are gypsies but true Bohemians, wanderers atwill, hither and yon. Josiah mentioned the idee of our leavin' the train for an hour or twoand havin' our fortunes told by a real gypsy, but I told him _soteyvosey_ that my fortune come along about as fast as I wuz ready for it, and I didn't know as I wanted to pay these swarthy creeters for lyin'to me. And he didn't contend for it, for which I wuz thankful. All along the way we see shrines with the faces of our Lord and Maryand Joseph lookin' out of 'em. And anon a little hamlet would appear, a meetin'-house with five or six dwellin' houses clustered round itlike a teacher in the midst of half a dozen scholars. Flowering shrubsand fruit trees almost hid the houses of the quiet little hamlets, and then we'd go by a village with forty or fifty houses, and as Itold Arvilly, in all these little places so remote from Jonesville andits advantages, the tragedy of life wuz goin' on just as it did inbigger places. And she said she wondered if they drinked; sez she, "If they do thereis tragedies enough goin' on. " Bohemia is a country of orchards. I should say there was fruit enoughthere so every man, woman and child there could have bushels andbushels of it to spare after they had eat their fill. Even along thehighways the bending trees wuz loaded with fruit. A good plan, too, and I told Josiah I would love to introduce it into Jonesville. Sez I, "How good it would be to have the toil-worn wayfarers rest under theshady branches and refresh themselves with good fruit. " And he said "He didn't want to toll any more tramps into Jonesvillethan there wuz already. " And I spoze they would mebby find it too handy to have all the goodfruit they wanted hangin' down over their heads as they trampedalong--I d'no but it would keep 'em from workin' and earnin' theirfruit. Anon the good car would whirl us from a peaceful country into mountainscenery, huge ledges of rock would take the places of the bendingfruit trees, and then jest as we got used to that we would be whirledout agin, and see a peaceful-lookin' little hamlet and long, quietfields of green. In the harvest fields we see a sight that made me sad and forebode, though it seemed to give Josiah intense satisfaction. We see as manyagin wimmen in the harvest field as we did men, and in Carlsbad we seeyoung girls carryin' brick and mortar to the workmen who wuz buildin'houses. I thought as I looked out on the harvest fields and see wimmendoin' all the hard work of raisin' grain and then havin' to cook itafter it wuz made into flour and breakast food it didn't seem right tome, it seemed as if they wuz doin' more than their part. But I spozedthe men wuz off to the wars fightin' and gittin' killed to satisfysome other man's ambition, or settlin' some other men's quarrels. Josiah sez, smilin' happily, "Wouldn't it look uneek to see Philurymowin' in our oat and wheat fields, and you and Sister Bobbett rakin'after and loadin' grain and runnin' the thrashin' machine?" "Yes, " sez I, "when I foller a thrashin' machine, Josiah Allen, orload a hay rack it will look uneeker than will ever take place on thisplanet, I can tell you to once. " But Arvilly sez, "Don't be too sure, Josiah Allen's wife; with threewars bein' precipitated on our country durin' one administration, andthe conquered contented regions havin' to be surrounded by oursoldiers and fit all the time to keep 'em from laughin' themselves todeath, you don't know how soon all of our men will be drafted into thearmy and we wimmen have to do all the farm work. " "Yes, " sez Josiah, "that is so, and you would be a crackin' good handto pitch on a load of hay or mow away, you are so tall. " "And you, " sez she with a defiant mean, "would be a good hand to putin front of the battle field; you're so short, the balls _might not_hit you the first round. " She put a powerful emphasis on the "might not, " and Josiah looked realagitated, and I sez: "Such talk is onprofitable, and I should advise you, Josiah, to useyour man's influence to try to make peace for the country's good, instead of wars for the profit of Trusts, Ambition, etc. , and you canescape the cannon's mouth, and Arvilly keep on sellin' books insteadof ploughin' and mowin'. " Robert Strong and Dorothy enjoyed Carlsbad the best that ever wuz. Idon't think they sot so much store by the water as they did the longmountain walks. Everybody here becomes a mountain climber. The doctorshere agree that this exercise is a great means of cure, and they makethe climbing easy and delightful. There are over thirty miles of goodroads over the mountains and around Carlsbad, and as you climb upwardsanon or even oftener you come to pretty little pavilions where you canrest and look off onto the delightful scenery, and every little whileyou'll come to a place where you can git good refreshments to refreshyou. The Sprudel, or Bubbling Well, bubbles over in a stream of almostboiling hot water five or six inches in diameter. It is so hot thatyou can't handle the mugs it is served in with your naked hand, youhold it by a napkin and have to take it a little sip at a time if youdon't want to be scalded. Josiah had disputed with me about the waters being so hot. He said itdidn't look reasonable to him that bilin' hot water would flow out ofthe cold ground, and he knowed they had told stories about it. "Why, "sez he, "if it wuz hot when it started it would git cooled off goin'through the cold earth. " But I sez: "They say so, Josiah--them that have been there. " "Well, " sez he, "you can hear anything. I don't believe a word on't. " And so in pursuance of his plan and to keep up his dignity he wouldn'ttake a napkin with his mug of water, but took holt on't with his nakedhand and took a big swaller right down scaldin' hot. He sot the mug down sudden and put his bandanna to his mouth, and Ibelieve spit out the most on't. He looked as if he wuz sufferin' themost excruciating agony, and I sez: "Open your mouth, Josiah, and I will fan it. " "Fan your grandmother!" sez he. "I didn't like the taste on't, Samantha; it most sickened me. " But I sez: "Josiah Allen, do you want some liniment on your hand andyour tongue? I know they pain you dretfully. " Sez he, smilin' a dretful wapeish smile: "It is sickish tastin'stuff. " And he wouldn't give in any further and didn't, though I knewfor days his mouth wuz tender, and he flinched when he took anythinghot into it. As I would look dreamily into the Bubblin' Well I would methink how Ido wish I knowed how and where you come to be so hot, and I'd thinkhow much it could tell if it would bubble up and speak so's we couldunderstand it. Mebby it wuz het in a big reservoir of solid gold andrun some of the way through sluice ways of shinin' silver and anonover beds of diamonds and rubies. How could I tell! but it kep' silentand has been mindin' its own bizness and runnin' stiddy for over sixhundred years that we know on and can't tell how much longer. Exceptin' in the great earthquake at Lisbon about a hundred and fiftyyears ago, it stopped most still for a number of days, mebby throughfright, but afer a few days it recovered itself and has kep' onflowin' stiddy ever since. It wuz named for Charles IV. , who they saydiscovered it, Charle's Bath or Carlsbad. His statute stands in themarket-place and looks quite well. Carlsbad has a population of twentyor thirty thousand, and over fifty thousand people visit Carlsbadevery summer to drink of the waters. Drinking and walking is what thedoctors prescribe and I d'no but what the walking in the invigoratingmountain air does as much good as the water. The doctor generallymakes you drink a glass about seven in the morning, then take a littlewalk, then drink another glass, and another little walk and so onuntil about eight, when you can go to the Swiss bakery and get thezwiebach or twice baked bread, which is handed you in a paper bag, andthen you can go to some cafay on the sidewalk and get coffee or teaand boiled eggs and make out your breakfast. No butter is given youunless the doctor orders it. That madded Josiah and he said they kep'it back because they wuz clost and wanted to save. He is a great casefor butter. And then after resting for an hour, you go for a walk up themountains, or if you are too weak to walk, you can get a cart and adonkey, the driver walking alongside; up the shady paths you will go, resting anon or oftener at some pleasant summer house or cafay. At oneyou have your dinner, you can get it anywhere along your way or goback to your tarven for it; Josiah and I generally went back and gotour dinner at the tarven and rested for a while. After dinner, folksgenerally go for another walk, but Josiah and I and Tommy used oftento go to the Sprudel Corridor and listen to first-rate music or to agarden concert nigh by. It wuz a sight to set in the Sprudel Corridor and see the crowds ofpeople go by, each one bearin' a little mug in their hands or strappedover their shoulders. All sorts of lookin' folks, handsome and humbly, tall and short, thick and thin, thousands and thousands of 'em a-goin'every morning for their drink and walk, drink and walk. There are sixor eight little girls at each of these springs who hand the water tothe guests and they have to work spry to keep 'em all supplied. It wuz a remarkable coincidence that royalty so soon after havin' theadvantage of a interview and advice from Josiah Allen's wife shouldagin have the privilege of listenin' to her invaluable precepts. Butnot so remarkable when you come to study on it philosophically. For itseems to be a law of nater that if one thing happens, another similarthing follers on and happens too, such as breakin' dishes, onexpectedcompany, meetin' royalty, etc. , etc. I wuz settin' alone in the Sprudel Corridor one day, for my pardnerhad gone with Tommy to see a little donkey that had took the child'sfancy and we meant to let him have a ride up the mountain on it andthe rest of our party had driv out to Mentoni's Spring, about twomilds from Carlsbad. I see a real sweet pretty girl coming along carrying her little mugjust like the rest of the folks. She wuz attended by a good-lookin'lady, who seemed to be looking out for her, and I hearn a bystandersay: "That's the Queen of Holland. " When I wuz told that the Queen of Holland wuz approachin' I sez, "Youdon't say so! you don't say that that is Willieminy?" "Yes, " sez the bystander standin' by. And I tell you I looked at her with all the eyes I had, and if I hadhad a dozen more I should have used them all, for I liked her looksfirst-rate, fair complected, blue eyes, light wavy hair, and a air ofdemure innocence and wisdom that wuz good to see. She wuz pretty andshe wuz good, I could see that as plain as I could tell a buff cochinhen from a banty. And I wuz glad enough, when havin' discoveredsunthin' she had left behind, her companion left her and went back tothe tarven and she come and sot down right by my side to wait forher. And as my rule is, I immegiately lived up to my privileges and toldher how highly tickled I wuz to have the chance to see her and tellher how much store I sot by her. Sez I: "My dear, I have always wantedto see you and tell you how much I have liked almost every move you'vemade since you got to be a sovereign and before. Your crown hain'tseemed to be top heavy, drawin' your fore top and your common sensedown with it as some crowns do. You've wore it sensible and you'vecarried your septer stiddy, and for a young girl like you to do themthings has seemed a great thing to me. A good many young girls wouldbe carried away if they wuz in a place like yours; I am most afraidTirzah Ann would at your age. " "Tirzah Ann?" sez she inquirin'ly. "Yes, Josiah Allen's girl by his first wife, " sez I. "I did my bestbringin' her up, but if a kag is filled with rain water you can't tapit and have it run cream or maple molasses. She wuz nateraly kindersentimental and vain and over dressy, and keeps up them traits to thisday. And I d'no what she would have done if she'd tried to rule akingdom at eighteen; I guess her subjects would have seen strangedoin's and strange costooms, though I think Tirzah means to be aChristian. But you've done first-rate, you've seemed to study the bestgood of your subjects and have made a big effort to have peace in theworld. I wuz dretul interested when you had that Peace Conference meetin your 'House in the Woods. ' I'd been more'n willin' to had it meetin our sugar house, but it wuzn't big enough, and it wuzn't socentral; it wuz better to have it where it wuz. "I guess I sot more store by your doin's in that respect than by anyother, for peace is what a sovereign and a subject must have to gitalong any ways comfortable. And at the present time what a comfort itwould be if the nations of the world could git holt on it. But italmost seems as if peace had spread her wings and flowed away fromthis planet, such cuttin's up and actin's are on every side, wars andrumors of wars, armies and navies crashin' up aginst each other, nations risin' up aginst nation, brothers' hands lifted up aginstbrothers and the hull world seemin' to be left to the mercy of thebloody fiend, War. "Well, you and I can't help it, Willieminy. I've done all I could inJonesville. I've talked a sight and sot Josiah up all I could to votefor peace, and you've done all you could in Holland, and so now we'vegot to set down and trust in the Providence that watches overJonesville and Holland. " She acted as if she felt real pleased with my praise, as well shemight, and I sez, "Another thing I've liked in you, Willieminy, youwuz so bound and determined to pick out your pardner for yourself andnot have him selected for you. Why, good land! a dress or a pair ofshues or gloves hain't half so apt to fit and set well if you leave'em for somebody else to pick out for you, and much more a pardner. Ihonored you for your idees in that direction, for you've probablyfound out, my dear, " sez I, "that even if you take sights of pains andpick him out yourself, a pardner is sunthin' that requires lots ofpatience and long sufferin' to git along with, though real convenientto have round lots of times when tramps are about, or reachin' upoverhead in the buttery, or at funerals, etc. It always looks noblerto have a man along with you than to mog along alone. And men areabout on a average as fur as their goodness goes with their femalepardners most of the time. "But he will be no he-angel, if you cross him just before meal time, or don't see that his clothes are mended up good. I hearn once of ayoung bride who thought her husband wuz perfect, and I spoze looked athis backbone sarahuptishushly from day to day a-worryin' for fear hiswings would sprout out and he would soar away from her to go and be anangel. But one day she mended a hole in his pocket, and bein' on-usedto mendin' she took a wrong turn, and sewed the pocket right up. "Well! well! I don't spoze she ever worried about his angel qualitiesafter that time. I spoze he cut up dretful and said words she neverdremp of his knowin' by sight, and she wuz jest as surprised andhorrified as she would have been to had a lamb or a cooin' dove bustout in profanity. But he wuz a likely man, and got over it quick, andwuz most too good to her for a spell afterwards, as pardners have beenwont to do on such occasions ever since the creation of the world. "But, as I say, matrimony has difficulties enough when Love heads theprocession and Wedded Bliss plays the trombone in the orkestry. " She looked real interested as if my words wuz awful congenial to her. And whilst watchin' her sweet face growin' brighter and sweeter, Ithought of another thing that I thought mebby she had been worryin'about and that I could comfort her up in, just as I would want ourTirzah Ann comforted under like circumstances, and I got real eloquenttalkin' about this before I got through. Sez I: "Of course, my dear, there wuz some talk about your pardnerhavin' his eye on your proppity, but I wouldn't let that worry me, forI've always said that if I wuz a rich, handsome young woman, I wouldjust as soon be married for my money as my beauty. They're bothoutside of the real self, equally transitory, or in fact, the money ifinvested in govermunt bonds is more lasting. For the national systemis fur more firm and steadfast than the physical. "Fifty years hence I spoze the money will all be safe and gainin'interest, so if that is what a woman is married for she will keep herattraction and even increase it. But fifty years hence where will herbeauty be, if she wuz married alone for that? Where are its powerfulattractions? All gone. If she had nothing but the beauty of snowy browand brilliant eye and clustering locks and perfect features. "But beauty that looks from the soul through the face. Ah! that isanother thing! That still remains when the dusky hair is changed towhite, when the glow is turned to shadows in the eyes, when the litheform is bent. That is a bit of the eternal, and forever young like itsCreator. You have got that beauty, my dear, as well as proppity, sodon't worry. " I felt real eloquent, and I could see by her looks that I wuzimpressin' her powerfully and givin' her sights of comfort in hertryin' place. But I knew that eppisodin', though interestin' and agreeable, devouredtime, and I knew that I must hold my eloquent emotions back and letCommon Sense take the reins and conclude my remarks, so I sez: "I hope from the bottom of my heart that your pardner is a good man, one that hain't too uppish, and is willin' to chore round the house alittle if necessary, and set store by you in youth and age, and thatyou and he will live happy and reign long over a peaceful and happyland. " I see her companion in the distance comin' slowly back as if nothardly dastin' to interrupt our conversation, and I sez, "Good-by, mydear, and God bless you. Give my respects to your pardner and QueenEmma, and if you ever come to Jonesville I would love to have you makeme a all day's visit, and I'll invite the children and kill a hen andmake a fuss. "I don't spoze Jonesville is so neat as Amsterdam; I spoze you can setdown and eat offen the sidewalk in Holland most anywhere, but I amcalled a good housekeeper, and will do the best I can. And now I don'twant you to put yourself out in the matter, but if you should come andcould manage it handy, if your ma would bring me some of your tulipseeds I'd swop with her and give her some of the handsomest sunflowersshe ever laid eyes on, and they make splendid food for hens to make'em lay. " She didn't give me any answer about this either way, and I thoughtmebby her ma might be short on it for bulbs, and I wouldn't sayanything more about it. But she bid me good-by real pleasant and weshook hands and wuz jest partin' away from each other when I thoughtof another very important thing that I wanted to warn the dear youngqueen about, and I turned round and sez: "Oh, I must warn you solemnly of one thing more before we part; I haveworried a sight about it; thinkin' so much on you as I do, I have beendretful afraid that you would be overflowed. If there should be bigrains and the ocean should rise half an inch I've felt I didn't knowwhat would become of you. You had better keep wash-tubs and pailshandy and don't be ketched out without rubber boots, and keep your eyeon leakages in the ground as well as govermuntal and financialaffairs. And now again I will say, my dear, God bless you andfarewell. " She shook hands agin quite warm, and with a sweet smile on a prettyyoung face she assured me that she would be careful, and she jined hercompanion and went on towards the spring. And I know she wuz dretfulpleased with what I'd said to her for I hearn her fairly laugh out asshe told the lady about it. Whilst we wuz in Carlsbad Miss Meechim took the mud baths. She saidthey wuz considered very genteel and I guess mebby they wuz, so manythings are genteel that are kinder disagreeable. They wuz also said tobe first-rate for the rumatiz and the nerves. But it seemed to me Ihad almost ruther have nerves than to be covered all over with thatnasty black mud. They take about sixty pounds of clay and mix it with the hot springwater till it is just about as thick as I make the batter forbuckwheat cakes in Jonesville, and I make that jest about as thick asI do my Injin bread. And you git into this bath and stay about half anhour. Then of course before you're let loose in society you're gin aclean water bath to git the mud off. Miss Meechim thought they helpedher a sight, and mebby they did, and she boasted a lot how genteelthey wuz. But I told her I had never been in the habit of settin' store by mudand lookin' up to it, and didn't believe I should begin at this lateday, but Josiah's rumatiz wuz so bad I didn't know but he had bettertake one. But he said he had took one in Jonesville some years agothat would last him durin' his nateral life. He did fall into a deep mud-puddle one night goin' to sister CelestineGowdey's for a bask pattern for Tirzah Ann. And it bein' dark and thepuddle a deep one he floundered round in it till he looked more like adrownded rat than a human bein'. He never could bear basks from thathour till this, and he has always dated his rumatiz from that time, but it hain't so; he had it before. But 'tennyrate he wouldn't takethe mud baths at Carlsbad, nor none of us did but Miss Meechim. Howsumever there are lots of folks that set store by 'em. CHAPTER XXXIV Well, we went back to Vienna, and from there set sail for Berlin, homeward bound. Josiah was in dretful good sperits, and said that nomonument or obelisk we had seen on our tower could ever roust up hisadmiration like the Jonesville M. E. Steeple when he should firstketch sight on't loomin' up beautiful and glorious from theenrapturin' Jonesville seenery. And I felt a good deal as he did, but knowed that his feelin's madehim go too fur, for Jonesville seenery hain't enrapturin', and the M. E. Steeple hain't glorious in aspect. But truly Love is the greatestsculptor and gilder in the world, and handles his brush in the mostmarvellous way. Under his magic touch the humblest cottage walls glowsbrighter than any palace. We had turned our footsteps toward homesweet home, and a light from above gilt them sacred precincts, and myown heart sung as glad a tune as Josiah's, though I tried to sing itas much as I could in the key of common sense. Well, we found that Berlin wuz a big, beautiful clean city. It is thecapital of Prussia and the German empire, which we all know is dividedup into little kingdoms, some as the Sylvester Bobbett farm is dividedup, but kinder lookin' up to Sylvester as the head on't. The old partof the city hain't so remarkable attractive, but the new part isbeautiful in its buildings and streets. And somehow the passersby lookcleaner and better off than in most cities. We didn't see a blindbeggar man led by a dog or a ragged female beggin' for alms whilst wewuz there, which is more than our cities at home can boast of. But in spite of all this, I spoze there is a good deal of cuttin' upand behavin' there. And I don't spoze that the name of the river that runs through it hasanything to do with that, though Josiah thought it did. He said: "Youcouldn't expect many morals or much stiddy behavior round a riverSpree. " But I don't spoze the name made a mite of difference. The water seemedto run along as smooth and placid as Dove Creek, that bathes thestreets of Loontown at home. Indeed, the waters of the Spree runsalong real slow and quiet. And I spoze the inhabitants there are abouton a equality with the dwellers in other cities in the old and newworld. Human nater is a good deal the same wherever you find it. AndI've always said that if I wanted to write a heart-searchin', heart-meltin' tragedy, I had just as soon turn away from the bigcities and go into some lonesome hamlet of New England, into some bigfaded farmhouse standin' by a dark weed-bordered sluggish creek, shaded by tall pollard willers. And there, behind the scraggly lilocksand cinnamon roses, and closed blinds of solid wood, with a littleheart-shaped hole in the centre that casts strange shadders on theclean painted floor within, there I would find my tragedy material. Mebby in some tall, scrawny woman's form, clad in brown calico, withscanty gray hair drawed tightly back from a pale face and imprisonedin a little hard knob at the back. When that hair wuz brown, and the mornin' sun wuz ketched in itsglistenin', wavin' tendrils, and the sunken cheeks wuz round and pinkas one of the cinnamon roses, and the faded ambrotype of the youngsoldier in her red wooden chest upstairs wuz materialized in ahandsome young man, who walked with her under the old willows when theslow-moving brook run swift with fancy's flight and her heart beathappily, and life wuz new and radiant with love and joy---- Before the changes come that swept them apart and left only a hollow, empty chamber in each heart, echoin' with footsteps that are walkin'heavily fur apart. Then, if I could write the full history of that life, its joys and itssorrows, its aspirations, its baffled hopes, its compensations thatdidn't compensate, the bareness of the life, the dagger-sharp trialswith what is called small things, the wild heart struggles veiled bythe New England coldness of expression, some as her sharp crags andstuns are covered with the long reign of ice and snow. The heartsickloneliness of oncongenial surroundin's, the gradual fading away ofhope and fears into the dead monotonous calm of hopelessness anddespair. There is a tragedy ready for the pen that would stand out as much morestriking and sharp-edged as the stun on a ontravelled highway isrougher than one worn down to smoothness by the feet of the multitude, a tragedy that would move the world could I tell it as it really is. But good land! What a hand to eppisode I be when I git to goin'. Imust stop this very minute, or I'll have the tragedy Alfred Tennysonspeaks on "Dyin' a Listener, " on my hands. Unter der Linden is as beautiful and imposing an avenue as I see on mytower, with tall, handsome houses risin' up on each side on't. Andthere are beautiful parks and pleasure ground and places of recreationof all kinds. The Academy of Music is famous for its fine concerts, the city seemsthe very home of melody, and beautiful statutes are seen on everyside. The equestrian statute of Frederic the Great is a grand one, andJosiah got all rousted up lookin' at it, and talked considerable to meabout what a imposin' figger he himself would make if he could besculped settin' on the mair. He said it would be a lovely sight aloomin' up in front of the M. E. Meetin'-house in Jonesville. But Igot his mind off from it quick as I could. One day when we wuz out drivin' through the handsome streets we wentto see the palace of Bismark. It wuz a large, stately mansion, opposite a pretty little park. But though this seemed the very abodeof luxury, I wuz told that Bismark loved the country fur better, andas Josiah and I delighted in the fields of Jonesville, so he lovedsweet Nature, and follered her all he could into her hants in thecountry. Josiah sot store by Bismark, and honors his memory, and heseemed real tickled when I sez to him: "Bismark always reminded me of you, Josiah, from what I've read ofhim. " Josiah was very tickled, and he sez with a proud happy look, "Yes, Ispoze I am a good deal like him, he wuz as brave as a lion, had goodsound horse sense and----" But I sez calmly, "I dare presoom to say, Josiah, that that is so. ButI wuz alludin' to his appetite, I have hearn that he had a splendidand immense appetite. " Josiah acted huffy, and I drawed his attention off onto the corners ofbase relief and the white statters ornamentin' the ruff. To our great sorrow, we found that Emperor William wuzn't to home. Ispoze it will be a great disappointment to him when he hears on't thatJosiah and I had really been there right to his home and he shouldn'tbe there. I well know how bad I should feel if Potentates come toJonesville and I happened to be off on a tower. And then I honoredEmperor William for his kind heart and kind actions and his goodsense, and felt bad enough to think I wuzn't goin' to see him. But owin' to Robert Strong's gittin' a letter from somebody tosomebody, we went through the palace just as I would want William togo through our house in Jonesville and the carriage-house and barn, ifwe happened to be away a visitin' when he come our way. And oh, what a sight that palace wuz on the inside when we come to gothrough it, and the outside too looked well, very strong and massiveand handsum and big, enormous big. Why, it contains six hundred rooms. And Miss Cornelius Bobbett thoughtshe had reached the very hite of grandeur when she moved into theirnew house that had six big rooms beside the bedrooms. And it did gofur ahead of the average Jonesville housen. But when I stood inWilliam's white saloon and our party wuz givin' utterance to differentejaculations of surprise and admiration I only sez instinctively: "Oh, if Sister Cornelius Bobbett only could see this room! what wouldshe say? How her pride would be lowered down. " For it did seem to me the most beautiful room I ever beheld. It wasmore than a hundred feet long, and about half that in width, and thecrystal glitter overhead reflected in the shinin' floor below wuzahead of anything I had ever seen, as brilliant as a hull forest ofice-sickles mingled in with statutes and columns and angels andeverything else beautiful. Here in this room Sessions of Parliament are opened. And I thought thelaws ort to be grand and noble indeed to make 'em worthy of the placethey was made in. But, immense as this room wuz, the picture gallery is most as big aginand full of beauty and inspiration from wall to wall and from floor toceilin'. The palace chapel is kinder round in shape, and has all sortsof soft and rich-colored marbles in the floor and wall. The altar wuzmade of Egyptian marble, a kind of buff color, and the pulpit wuz madeof Carrera marble. I spoze powerful sermons have been preached fromthat pulpit. In Berlin the most beautiful pictures are to be seen on every side onpalace walls and in picture galleries, Dorothy and Robert just dotedon 'em and so did I. But Josiah always complained of his corns whilstwalkin' through 'em. A picture gallery just started them corns toachin' the worst kind from his tell. [Illustration: Samantha points out the beauties of the WhiteSaloon. --Page 430. ] The Bourse is sunthin' like our stock exchange, but big enough toaccommodate thousands of money-seekers. I spoze they have lively timeshere anon or oftener--the river Spree runs right in front on't (thoughI don't think that makes a mite of difference). More than fifty bridges cross this river and it divides out intocanals and little streams, all of which comes together agin and flowsaway into the sea. The Alson bridge is one of the most beautiful bridges I ever sot myeyes on, and not fur off is the Alson Platz, a very charming publicgarden. Shady paths, trees, flowers, sculpture, all make this gardenvery attractive. Not fur off is the Konigs Platz, one of the most imposing parts of thecity. In the centre of this square stands the grand monument toVictory, it is high and lofty as a monument to Victory ort to be, solid and massive at the base (for in order to be successful you havegot to have a good underpinnin' of principle and gumption) and crownedwith a noble-lookin' figger, standin' amidst a flock of eagles. The Royal Theatre is a handsome building and looks some in frontlike our own Capitol in Washington, D. C. It stands between twomeetin'-houses, as if it laid out to set back and enjoy itsneighborhood and be real respectable. In front of it stands a fine monument to the German poet, Schiller. Isot store by him. Thomas J. Used to read his books to his Pa and me agood deal when he wuz tendin' the Cademy to Jonesville, his dramas andhis poems, so Josiah and I felt quite well acquainted with him, andwhen we see his name here amidst foreign seens it give us quiteagreeable emotions, some as if we wuz a travellin' in Africa andshould see a obelisk riz up with Deacon Henzy's name on it. Also I wuzinterested in looking at the beautiful equestrian statute of FredericWilliam the illustrious elector, who did so much to make his countrygreat. It stands on a bridge, as if dominating sea and land, as he did a gooddeal whilst he wuz alive. He looks calm and powerful, and has a lookon his face as if he could do most anything he sot out to do. And thefour slaves grouped round the base of the statute seem to look up tohim as if they trusted him implicitly. His clothes wuzn't exactly what I would want Josiah sculped in if hewuz to be rared up in marble, and it seems as if so many skirts andsuch a long cloak floatin' out must be in a man's way if he wuz in ahurry. But where is there anything perfect here below? It wuzremarkably handsome, take it as a hull. Dorothy and Robert said they wanted to see the statute of Gerty. And Josiah whispered to me and sez, "Gerty who? I didn't know as theyknew any Gertrude that wuz buried here. " And I whispered back, "They mean Goethe, Josiah. You know Thomas J. Has read us quite a lot of his writings. " Sez I, "Don't you rememberabout little Mignon, who wuz so home-sick for her own land, and wouldkeep askin': 'Knowest thou the land where citron apples bloom, And oranges like gold amidst the leafy gloom?' "You remember it, Josiah. I've seen you shed tears when he wuz readin'about her. " And Josiah whispered back in a loud shrill whisper that I know theyhearn: "If they wanted to see Go-ethe, why didn't they say Go-ethe?"(He always would pronounce his name to rhyme with sheath. ) I felt mortified, nothin' seems worse when you're tryin' to quell apardner down than to have him whisper back so loud. Why, I have hadJosiah right to my own table when I've had company and he wuz makin'onlucky remarks, I've known him to ask me right out what I wuzsteppin' on his toe for, and I wuz worse off than as if I hadn'ttried to curb him in. But then he has a host of good qualities, andpardners are dretful handy lots of times. But life is a kind of awarfare to the best and happiest on us. Well we all went to see the statute to Goethe; it stands in a pleasantspot in the Thiergarten surrounded by shrubs and trees. The face ofthe great poet is full of the sadness and glory of them that seevisions and dream dreams. Grouped about him are the sculptured formsof Tragedy, Lyrical Poetry, and Research. It wuz a impressive monumentand rousted up more emotions in me than any that I see in Berlin. Well, we didn't stay long in Prussia, for the cords that wuz drawin'us home tightened from day to day, the children and Philury drawin'them cords closter ever and anon with long and loving letters, and wehastened on to Hamburg. It wuz a lovely day when we sot out on ourjourney and we wuz all feelin' well, specially Josiah and I, for everyrevolution of the wheels brought us nigher to our beloved Jonesvilleand every toot of the engine seemed to shout afresh the joyful tidin'sto us that we had sot our faces towards the bright hearth stun ofhome. We had no eventful experiences on the journey to relate, unless it wuza interview we had with a young man, a Freshman I believe he wuz fromsome college, travellin' with his tutor, and he seemed real fresh, heseemed to have plenty of money but a scarcity of brains, or mebby hehad enough brains, but they seemed to be in a sort of a soft state, and I guess they'll harden up some when he gits older if he has goodluck with them. I wuz most a good mind to advise him to set in the sun bareheaded allhe could, thinkin' mebby it might harden 'em some, but didn't know howit would be took. He thought he knew a sight, but the shadder he really cast on worldlyaffairs wuz exceedingly small, he could step over it the hull time, but he felt that it reached the horizon. Robert talked quite a gooddeal with him, to pass away the time I spoze, but there wuz a queersmile in his eyes and kinder patient and long sufferin' as if to say: "You'll know more in the future than you do now and I'll bear withyou. " The young man thought he wuz patronizin' Robert, I knew from hisliniment. He wuz a infidel, and seemed to think it made him verysmart. You know some folks do think it is real genteel to doubt and amark of a deep thinker. I hearn him go on for quite a spell, for Robert wouldn't argy withhim, thinkin' I spoze it might strain his arm to hit at vacancy. Butat last I seemed to have to speak up to Miss Meechim and say: "How strange it is that some folks think the less they believe thebigger it makes 'em, but good land! it don't take much intellect tobelieve in nothin', it don't strain the mind any if it is ever soweak. " I guess he hearn me, for he kinder changed his talk and went topatronizin' the seenery. Well, it wuz beautiful a good deal of theway, though at the last of our journey it broke out rainy all of asudden right whilst Josiah wuz all engaged in admirin' a particularview, and it grew cold and disagreeable. And he bein' tired out, worried a sight about the rain and the suddenness on't and how itstopped his sight-seein' and brung on his rumatiz, and he complainedof his corns and his tight boots, and said that I had ort to seen thathe wuz dressed thicker, and fretted and acted. And I sez: "You've got to take things as they come, Josiah. I couldn't sendanybody out this mornin' to bring in a pail of weather to see if itwuz goin' to rain. You've got to take it as it comes, and when itcomes, and make the best on't. " But he still acted restless and oneasy, and most cried, he felt sobad. And I went on and dilated on the merits of calmness and serenityand how beautiful traits they wuz and how much to be desired. And he snapped me up enough to take my head off, and said that he"couldn't always be calm and wuzn't goin' to try to be. " "No, " sez I reasonable, "you've got to be megum in that, or in eatin'bread and milk; of course, you could kill yourself on that, though itseems innocent and harmless; you can carry everything too fur. " And seein' that his liniment still bore the marks of restlessoneasiness and onhappiness, I eppisoded a little on his side of thequestion, for what will not a woman do to ease a pardner's mind andcomfort him? "Yes, Josiah, Cousin Joel Smith's life used to be so serene and sodeadly calm on all occasions that she used to mad Uncle Joel, who wuzof a lively and active temperament, like the most of the Smiths. "I asked Joel once on a visit there, when she had been so collectedtogether and monotonous in aspect, and talked with such oneven andsweetness of tone that I got dead tired on't myself, and felt that Ihad been lookin' on a sunbaked prairie for months, and would have beenglad enough to had her got up a change of liniment some way, and achange of axent higher or lower, I sez to Cousin Joel. "Do you spoze Serintha Jane would git excited and look any differentand talk any faster or louder if the house should get afire?" And he said no, the house did git afire once, when he wuz away. Andshe discovered it in the morning whilst she wuz makin' some scollopsin her hair (she always had her hair scolloped just as even as ever ababy's petticoat wuz), keepin' that too calm and fixed through bangsand braids. She had scolloped it on one side and wur just beginnin' iton the other when she see the fire, and she went gently to the door, opened it in a quiet ladylike way, and asked a neighbor goin' by inher low even axent, if he would kindly stop a minute. And the neighborstopped and she said sweetly: "Could I trouble you to do a little errand for me if you are goingdown town, or would it incommode you?" He said he would do it. Well, she said she didn't want him incommoded, "but, " sez she, "if itis not too much trouble will you please tell my husband that I wouldlike to have him come home as soon as he can make it convenient to doso, for the house is afire. " And then she smiled sweetly and made alow bow, and went back into the house lookin' real serene, and went toscollopin' the other side of her fore-top. The neighbor started off wildly on the run hollerin' "fire!" and"help!" for he see the flames bustin' out of one of the chamberwinders. He got the fire engine and the neighbors collected, and gotmost of the furniture out below, and they couldn't hardly git her tomake a move, for she hadn't got the last scallop made, but finallysomebody grabbed her, and kinder hauled her out, she a tryin' tosmile, they say, and look calm, as she was borne out. I told Joel, before I thought, that "she ort to been singed, and thatit would have done her good, mebby it would rousted her up a little. " And I guess he felt so too, though he didn't say so. Josiahlooked real interested, and I sez, fur I didn't dast to have theencouragement go too fur that way: "Calmness and serenity are beautiful, Josiah, and almost alwaysdesirable, though when a house gits afire you ort to let up on 'em alittle. " Josiah's liniment looked quite a little clearer, but some shaddersstill remained, and I went on tenderly and pictured out to him thefirst meal I would cook for him when we got home. And then hisliniment grew peaceful and happy, and he sez gratefully: "You're so calmin' to the nerves, Samantha, when you set out to be, you're a perfect iodine. " I d'no really what he did mean, I guess it wuz anodyne, I keep abottle to home for nerves. But 'tennyrate in a few minutes he wuztalkin' quite glib about home and the children and I felt richlyrepaid for all my trouble. And with such little agreeable talk andeppisodin' did I try to diversify the weariness of travel. Josiah is a great case for Hamburg steaks, and he confided to me thehope that we would git some here that would go even beyond any that Ihad ever cooked and that would ensure him a future of this deliciousfood. But we didn't see a sign on 'em in the city. He wuz bitterlydisappinted. Hamburg is a free state, small, but I spoze feelin' quite big andindependent. It is ruled by a Senate of eighteen members, and a houseof Burgesses of one hundred and ninety-two members, and they maketheir own laws and keep 'em, I spoze, the most on 'em, and get alongquite well and prosperous. There is a beautiful little lake in the heart of the city on whichsmall gaily painted boats dart to and fro carrying passengers likeomnibuses in city streets. Beautiful bridges cross the Alster, atributary of the Danube, and tall handsome houses line the streets. They are great cases for flowers there in Hamburg. You meet flowershops and flower sellers on every side. But they are not the beautifulflower girls we read of in stories. They are mostly old wimmen, tooold for hard work. They wear short skirts, comin' just below theirknees, black bodices, long black stockings with gay colored garters, wooden shoes, broad-brimmed hats, saucer shaped, trimmed with stiffblack cambric bows. We wuz only there for one day, but long enough to drive through theprincipal streets and see some of the principal sights and git restedsome, and then we sailed away for Home Sweet Home, via London, England. We didn't stay very long in London, but long enough so we could lookabout us some. Robert Strong had considerable bizness to attend tothere, which, of course, devoured his time, and Dorothy had a numberof young girl friends who lived there, and she wanted to go and seethem, and she entertained 'em at our tarven: sweet, fresh-complectedyoung girls; they wuz almost as pretty as Dorothy herself, but notquite. Arvilly had a cousin on her own side that she wanted to visit, and, ofcourse, she wanted to canvass more or less, so that left Josiah and Ifree a good deal of the time to go and come as we liked. Of coursedear Little Tommy wanted to see everything and go everywhere. MissMeechim and Dorothy took Tommy with them several times, and so didRobert Strong, and, of course, some days when we wuz all at liberty wewould all go out together sightseeing. Josiah said most the firstthing that he wanted to see the Tower of London, and Tommy wanted tosee the Crystal Palace, takin' a fancy to the name I spoze, and I told'em we would go to these places the first chance we had. But deep in my heart wuz one purpose. I had laid on a certain plan dayand night, kep' it in my mind and lotted on it. But of this more anon. This wuz my major plan. Amongst my minor ones wuz my desire to seeWestminster Abbey agin. I had been there once on a former tower, but Iwanted to stand agin by the tombs of them I so deeply honored; and therest of the party feelin' as I did, we all set out there most thefirst thing. I also sot store by Westminster Abbey on account of its being theplace where Victoria, honored queen and woman, wuz crowned, as well asall of England's monarchs. It is a magnificent building, no othermausoleum in the world can compare with it; it is almost worthy ofbeing the resting-place of the great souls that sleep there. Dorothy'ssweet face and Robert's noble liniment took on reverent looks as westood by the tomb of saint and sage, hero and poet. We went from there to see the Houses of Parliament, immense buildingsfull of interest and associations. We also went to see St. Paul's Cathedral, which towers up in majesty, dwarfin' the other buildin's near it. It is a marvellous structure insize and beauty, only two bigger buildings in the world, St. Peter'sat Rome, and the Milan Cathedral. What a head Sir Christopher Wren must have had, and what a monument tohis genius this gigantic pile is. No wonder he wanted this epitaph puton his tomb: "If you want to see his monument, look about you. " Many other noted men are buried here, Bishop Heber, John Howard, SirJoshua Reynolds, Wellington, Nelson and Sir John Moore, who wuz"buried darkly at dead of night, " as so many bashful schoolboys knowto their sorrow, as they rehearse it in a husky voice to the assembledneighbors the last day of school. Oh, how much they wish as they tryto moisten their dry tongue and arrange their too visible and varioushands, that the night wuz still darker, so dark that nothin' wuz everhearn on't. Feelin' the admiration I did for his livin' and lovin' pardner, I wuzglad to see the Albert monument. It wuz evenin' when we see it, andthe garden where it stands wuz illuminated. The great elms glowedunder a multitude of red lights. The music-stands glowed with stars ofthe same color, and the fountains riz up in great sprays of color andradiance. It wuz a beautiful seen, but none too grand for the greatgood man whose name the tall shaft bears. Albert Hall, which stands in the same grounds, wuz also brilliantlyilluminated; its long glass corridors shone as if wrought out ofcrystal and ruby. One day we rode from Blackfriars' bridge past the Mansion House, wherethe Lord Mayor holds his receptions. And what interested me fur more, we went past the place where the Foreign Bible Society prints morethan three million Bibles a year in two hundred different languagesand dialects, carrying the knowledge and love of our Lord unto theends of the earth. CHAPTER XXXV Buckingham Palace wuz a sight to see, beautiful and grand, and not furoff is St. James's Park, one of the most attractive in the city thoughit wuz once only a marshy field. As I looked on its charming anddiversified beauty I thought how little there is in heredity comparedto gumption and draining. Josiah, as I said, wanted to see the Tower of London. It is the mostcelebrated fortress in England. It is awful old, and good land! if Iwuz shet up there I shouldn't never expect to break out. Some of thewalls are fifteen feet thick. The White Tower, they say, wuz begun byWilliam the Conqueror, a man that I told the guide politely, "wuzquite widely known, and I had hearn a sight of him though I had neverhad the pleasure of his acquaintance. " It wuz completed in onethousand ninety-eight. Josiah and I wandered round there for hours, and should most probablegot lost and mebby been gropin' round there to-day if it hadn't beenfor the guide. I wuz dretful interested in London Bridge. The present structure costseven million, so they say, and I wouldn't have built it for a centless. I thought as I stood there of what had took place on that spotsince Sir William Wallace's day and how his benign head (most everybump on it good ones) wuz put up there a mark for the insultin' jeersof the populace, and it made me feel bad and sorry for Helen, his lastwife, she that wuz Helen Mar. But Sir Thomas More's head wuz nailed upin the same place, and the Bishop of Rochester's and lots of others. It wuzn't right. And then I thought of the gay seens that had took place there, thetournaments and triumphal marches and grand processions and sad ones, and the great multitude who have passed over it, prince and beggar, velvet and rags, a countless throng constantly passing, constantlychanging, no more to be counted than the drops of water in the silentstream below, all the time, all the time sweepin' on to the sea. I hadsights of emotions. And all the while I wuz in London, in the gay streets and quiet ones, in palace or park, the shade of Dickens walked by my side or a littlein advance, seemin' to pint out to me the places where he had walkedwhen he see visions and dreamed dreams. And I almost expected to meetLittle Nell leading her grandpa, or David Copperfield, or Peggotysearching for Em'ly, or some of our Mutual Friends. And so with Thackeray. As I looked up at the gloomy houses on somequiet street I almost expected to see the funeral hatchment of old SirPitt Crawley's wife and Becky Sharp's little pale face peering out, orsweet Ethel Newcomb and her cousin Clive, and the dear old General andHenry Esmond, and etc. , etc. And so with Alfred Tennyson. In somebeautiful place of drooping foliage and placid water I almost feltthat I should see the mystic barge drawin' nigh and I too should floatoff into some Lotus land. And so with all the other beloved poets andauthors who seem nigher to us than our next door neighbors in theflesh. Dorothy havin' never been there, felt that she must see Shakespeare'shome, which is a journey of only three hours by rail, so we made avisit there one day, passing through some of England's most beautifulseenery on our way, grand old parks with stately houses rising up intheir midst, gray stun churches in charming little villages, thatched-roof cottages, picturesque water-mills; it wuz all a lovelypicture of rural England. It being a little too long a journey for one day, we stayed all nightat Shakespeare's Inn, where the great poet went daily for his glassof stimulant--so they say. But I am glad I don't believe everythingthat I hear. Arvilly mourned to think that she couldn't have sold him America'stwin crimes: "Intemperance and Greed"; but I kinder changed thesubject. As much store as I set by Arvilly's cast-iron principles, somehow I couldn't bear the thought of having Shakespeare canvassed. All the rooms are named after Shakespeare's plays, painted over thedoors in black letters. We slept in "All's Well That Ends Well"--agood name--and we slept peaceful, thinkin' likely that it would turnout so. Miss Meechim had the "Merry Wives of Windsor. " She wanted tochange with Arvilly, who had "Love's Labor's Lost, " but Arvillywouldn't budge. Miss Meechim told me in confidence that if Shakespeare could have hadthe benefit of her advice he would probable have called it "TheUnfortunate Wives of Windsor. " "And then, " sez she, "I could haveoccupied it with more pleasure. " But I didn't much think that he wouldhave changed his plans or poetry if she had been on the spot. The next morning early we set out for Shakespeare's cottage, describedso often, saw the room in which the great poet was born, and wuz toldthat nothing had been changed there since he lay in his cradle, whichwe could believe as we looked about us on the low walls, the diamondpanes of the windows and the quaint old furniture. The cottage is nowused for Shakespeare's relics, some of which looked as if they mightbe real, and some as if they wuz made day before yesterday. We visitedthe church where he wuz baptized and saw on one of the pews the metalplate on which is engraved the name of the poet's father. And, thinkin' that a visit to Shakespeare's home wouldn't be completewithout seeing the place where his heart journeyed whilst his life wuzyoung and full of hope and joy, we drove out to Shottery, to thelittle farmhouse where his sweetheart, Ann Hathaway, lived. It is a quaint little cottage, and after going through it we drank aglass of water drawn up by a well sweep from the very same old wellfrom which Shakespeare drank so many times. As I stood there I saw infancy the rosy, dimpled Ann handing the crystal water to the boy, Will, who mebby whispered to her as he took the glass sweet words, allrhyming with youth and joy and love. And the same blue sky bent above us; birds wheeled and sung over ourheads, descendants, mebby, of the birds that sung to them that day. Ihad sights of emotions--sights of 'em--and so I did in the cottage asI sot on the old, old settle in the corner of the fireplace, whose agenobdy could dispute, as its stiff old joints are strengthened withbands of iron, where young Will Shakespeare and his sweetheart oftensat, and where he might have read to her the new poem in honor of hercharms: "To melt the sad, make blithe the gay, And nature charm Ann hath a way. She hath a will, She hath a way-- To breathe delight, Ann Hathaway. " He or she didn't dream of his future greatness, and I dare say thatold Pa Hathaway, who mebby slept nigh by, might have complained to herma, "Wonderin' what that fool meant by talkin' in poetry at that timeof night. " And, mebby, if he soared too high and loud in verse, old PaHathaway might have called out: "Ann! cover up the fire and go to bed! Billy wants to go home!" I don't say this wuz so, but mebby. So holden are our eyes and sodifficult it is for the human vision to discern between an eagle and acommoner bird, when the wings are featherin' out, before they are fullplumed for a flight amongst the stars. Well, we went back to London, tired, but riz up in our minds, andrenewed our sightseeing there. Miss Meechim and Dorothy bought lots of things that they said theycould git cheaper in England, and Arvilly wuz in great sperits; shesold three books, sold herself out and went home with an empty box buta full purse. Robert wuz busy up to the last minute, but managed tospend time to take Tommy to see some famous waxworks he had promised. About the middle of the forenoon Robert Strong proposed that we shouldall go and take a last drive in the park, and we set off, all butArvilly. She thought of some one in another part of the city that shewanted to canvass, and she started off alone in a handsome. MissMeechim and Dorothy wuz feelin' well. Tommy, who wuz in fine sperits, wuz perched as usual on Robert Strong's knee. The sheltered drives and smooth windin' roads wuz gay with passers-by, and the seen wuz beautiful, but I wuz sad and deprested about onething. King Edward is a real good natered man, and a good pervider, and seems to set store by America. And Queen Alexandra is a sweet, good woman. But still in these last hours I kep' thinkin' of Edwardses' Ma, whowas rainin' here durin' my last visit. I wuz kep' from visitin' her atthat time by P. Martyn Smythe and onfortunate domestic circumstances. And I have always worried for fear she hearn I wuz in London that timeand never went nigh her; she not knowin' what hendered me. I writ her a letter to make her mind easy, but must know she never gotit, for she never writ a word in reply. I posted the letter I spoke onwith my own hands. I directed it WIDDER ALBERT, London, England. It runs as follers: "Dear and revered Queen and Widder: "I tried my best to git to see you whilst in London, but Josiah's clothes wuzn't fit; he had frayed 'em out on a tower, and his shirts wuz yeller as saffern, half washed by underlins. I wouldn't demean him in your sight by bringin' him with me and he wuz worrisome and I couldn't leave him. You've been married and you know how it is. "So I have to return home sad-hearted without settin' my eyes on the face of a woman I honor and set store by, a good wife, a good mother, a good ruler. The world hangs your example up and is workin' up to the pattern and will in future generations. No doubt there is a few stitches that might be sot evener in the sampler, but the hull thing is a honor to our humanity and the world at large. I bow to your memory as I would to you in deep honor and esteem. And if we do not meet here below may we meet in them heavenly fields you and your Albert, Josiah and I, young and happy, all earthly distinctions washed off in the swellin's of Jordan. "And so God bless you clear down to the river banks whose waves are a swashin' up so clost to our feet, and adoo. "JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE. " I never hearn a word from her, and I am afraid she died thinkin' I hadslighted her. The next morning bright and early we went aboard the ship that wuz totake us home. It wuz a fair day; the fog dispersed and the sun shoneout with promise and the waves talked to me of Home, Sweet Home. It wuz a cold lowerin' day when the good ship bore us into New Yorkharbor. The gray clouds hung low some as if they wuz a sombry canopyready to cover up sunthin', a crime or a grief, or a tomb, or mebbyall on 'em, and a few cold drops fell down from the sky ever and anon, some like tears, only chill and icy as death. These thoughts come into my mind onbid as I looked on the heavy pallof dark clouds that hung low over our heads some like the dark draperyhangin' over a bier. But anon and bime bye these dark meditations died away, for what wuzcloud or cold, or white icy shores? It wuz home that waited for us;Jonesville and my dear ones dwelt on that shore approachin' us sofast. Bitter, icy winds would make the warm glowin' hearth fire ofhome seem brighter. Love would make its own sunshine. Happiness wouldwarm the chill of the cold November day. Thomas J. And Maggie stood on the pier, both well and strong; Tommysprung into their arms. They looked onto his round rosy face throughtears of gratitude and thankfulness and embraced me with the same. Andwuzn't Thomas J. Happy? Yes, indeed he wuz, when he held his boy inhis arms and had holt of his ma's hands, and his pa's too. And Maggie, too, how warmly she embraced us with tears and smiles chasing eachother over her pretty face. Tirzah Ann and Whitfield wuz in the city, but didn't come to the minute, bein' belated, as we learnt afterwards, by Tirzah Ann a waverin' in a big department store between a pink anda blue shiffon front for a new dress. But they appeared in a few minutes, Tirzah Ann with her arms full ofbundles which dribbled onnoticed on the pier as she advanced andthrowed her arms round her pa's and ma's neck. Love is home, and withour dear children's arms about us and their warm smiles of delight andwelcome and their loving words in our ear, we had got home. The children wuz stayin' at a fashionable boardin' house, kept by MissEliphalet Snow, a distant relation of Maggie's, who had lost herpardner and her property, but kep' her pride and took boarders forcompany, so she said. And we wuz all goin' to start for Jonesvilletogether the next day. But as the baggage of our party wuz kindermixed up, Josiah and I thought we would go with Miss Meechim's partyto the tarven and stay. Robert Strong and our son, Thomas J. , met like two ships of one linewith one flag wavin' over 'em, and bearing the same sealed orders fromtheir Captain above. How congenial they wuz, they had been friendsalways, made so onbeknown to them, they only had to discover eachother, and then they wuz intimate to once, and dear. Dorothy and Miss Meechim and the children greeted each other withsmiles and glad, gay words. Yes, all wuz a happy confusion of lightwords, gay laughter, Saratoga trunks, smiles, joy, satchel bags--wehad got home. As I stood there surrounded by all that I prized most on earth I had aglimpse of a haggard lookin' form arrayed in tattered finery, a bentfigure, a young old face, old with drink and dissipation, that lookedsome way familiar though I couldn't place her. She looked at our partywith a strange interest and seemed to say some murmured words ofprayer or blessing or appeal, and disappeared--soon forgot in ourboundless joy and the cares tendin' to our baggage. Arvilly wuz glad to set her feet on shore, for she too loved hernative land with the love that a good principled, but sternstepmother has for a interestin' but worrisome child that she'sbringin' up by hand. She thought she would go with the children totheir boarding-place, havin' knowed Miss Eliphalet Snow in theiryoung days, when Miss Snow wuz high-headed and looked down on her, and wantin' to dant her, I spoze, with accounts of her foreigntravel. And we parted to meet agin in the mornin' to resoom ourvoyage to Jonesville--blessed harbor where we could moor our twobarks, Josiah's and mine, and be at rest. Miss Meechim and Dorothy and Robert laid out to start for Californiathe next day, as business wuz callin' Robert there loud and he had torespond. And I may as well tell it now as any time, for it has got to be told. I knowed it wuz told to me in confidence, and it must be kep' for aspell anyway, Robert and Dorothy wuz engaged, and they wuz goin' to bemarried in a short time in her own beautiful home in San Francisco. Now you needn't try to git me to tell who told me, for I am not as sotas cast iron on that, I shall mention no names, only simply remarkin'that Dorothy and Robert set store by me and I by them. Them that toldme said that they felt like death to not tell Miss Meechim of theengagement, but knowin' her onconquerable repugnance to matrimony andto Dorothy's marriage in particular, and not knowin' but what the newswould kill her stun dead, them that told me said they felt that theyhad better git her back to her own native shores before bein' told, which I felt wuz reasonable. How I did hate to part with sweet Dorothy, I loved her and she mevisey versey. And Robert Strong, he sot up in my heart next to ThomasJ. , and crowdin' up pretty clost to him too. Miss Meechim also had herproperties, and we had gone through wearisome travel, dangers andfatigues, pleasant rest, delightful sight-seeing, poor vittles, joyand grief together, and it wuz hard to break up old ties. But it hadto be. Our life here on this planet is made up of meetin's andpartin's. It is hail and farewell with us from the cradle to thegrave. We all retired early, bein' tired out, and we slept well, littlethinkin' of the ghastly shape that would meet us on the thresholt ofthe new day. But, oh, my erring but beloved country! why ortn't we toexpect it as long as you keep the mills a-goin' that turns out suchblack, ghastly shadders by the thousands and thousands all the time, all the time, to enwrap your children. Dorothy never knowed it--what wuz the use of cloudin' her bright younglife with the awful shadder? But then, as I told Robert, that black, dretful pall hangs over every home and every heart in our country andis liable to fall anywhere and at any time, no palace ruff is too highand no hovel ruff is too low to be agonized and darkened by its sombryfolds. But he said it would make Dorothy too wretched, and he could not haveher told, and I agreed to it, but of course I told my pardner and hisheart wuz wrung and his bandanna wet as sop in consequence on't. Andhe told Miss Meechim, too, that mornin', and her complaisant belief ingenteel drinkin' and her conservative belief in the Poor Man's Club, wuz shook hard--how hard I didn't know until afterwards. Oh, how she, too, loved Aronette! The children when they wuz told on't mournedbecause we did, and on their own account too, for they sot store byher what little they had seen of her--for nobody could see her withoutloving her. As for Arvilly, her ideas on intemperance couldn't be added to ordiminished by anything, but she wep' and cried for days. * * * * * Well, I spoze you all want to know the peticulars. Robert Strong wuzthe first one that left the tarven in the mornin'. He had to see a manvery early on business. He went out by the ladies' entrance. And therecrouched on the cold stun steps, waitin' we spozed to ketch anotherglimpse of Dorothy, and mebby to ask for help, for she wuz almostnaked, and her plump little limbs almost skin and bone, dead and cold, frozen and starved, so we spozed, lay Aronette. Pretty, happy littlegirl, dearly beloved, thrown by Christian America to the wild beastsjust as sure as Nero ever did, only while he threw his human victimsto be torn and killed for fun, America throws her human victims, herchoicest, brightest youth, down to ruin and death, for greed. Whichlooks the Worst in God's sight? I d'no nor Josiah don't. Well, Robert called a ambulance, had the poor boney, ragged victimtook to a hospital, but all efforts wuz vain to resuscitate her. Shehad gone to give in her evidence against America's license laws, aginst Army Canteen, Church and State, aginst Licensed Saloon Keeper, aginst highest official and lowest voter, aginst sinner and saint, whoby their encouragement or indifference make such crimes possible. The evidence wuz carried in, the criminals must meet it, it is waitin'for 'em, waitin'. Of course the New York parties who helped Robert, policemen, doctors, and nurses, thought very little of it, it wuz socommon, all over the land, they said, such things was happening allthe time from the same cause. And we knew it well, we knew of the wideopen pit, veiled with tempting covering, wove by Selfishness andGreed, scattered over with flimsy flowers of excuse, palliation, expediency that tempts and engulfs our brightest youth, the noblestmanhood, old and young, rich and poor--it is very common. But to us who loved the pretty, merry little maid, rememberin' her sohappy and so good, and saw her ruined and killed before our eyes bythe country that should have protected her, we kept it in our hearts, we could not forgit it. Robert Strong had her buried in a quiet corner of a cemetery and leftorders for a stun cross to be put up to mark her grave. He asked me towrite the epitaph which he had carved in the marble, and I did: Aronette Young, Happy, Beloved--Murdered! Vengeance is mine saith the Lord. Robert had it put on just as I writ it. He didn't tell Dorothyanything about her death till they got home. She never see theepitaph; it wuz true as truth itself, but it wuz hash, and might havemade her bed-sick, lovin' Aronette as she did. But after DorothyStrong wuz livin' with him, blessed and happy in their pretty, simplehome in his City of Justice, then he told her that Aronette wuz dead, died in a hospital and wuz buried in a pleasant graveyard. And Dorothymourned for her as she would for a beloved sister. Yes, Dorothy will mourn for her all her days. The young man who wuz tomarry her will live under the shadow of this sorrow all his life, forhe is one of the constant ones who cannot forgit. The old grandmotherin Normandie waited for letters from her darling which never came, andwill die waiting for her. The young man who enticed the pretty little maid into the canteen, licensed by America, and gave her stupefying drink, licensed by ourlaws, took her, staggering and stupid, to another dretful house, madeas respectable as they can make it by our Christian civilization. Helived long enough, I spoze, to add several more victims to thecountless list of such murders that lays on our country's doorsteps, and then he too died, a bloated, loathsome wreck, makin' anothervictim for the recordin' angel to mark down, if there is room in herenormous books of debt and credit with this traffic for another name. And I spoze there is, for them books tower up mountain high, and newones have to be opened anon or oftener, and will I spoze till God'stime of reckonin' comes and the books are opened and the debts paid. It wuz a lovely day when we see the towers of Jonesville loom up abovethe billows of environin' green. (I mean the M. E. Steeple showin' up beyend Grout Nickleson's pinewoods. ) As the cars drew into the station they tooted their delight agin andagin at our safe return as the train stopped. As we walked up the platform I see Josiah furtively on-button hisstiff linen cuffs as if preparin' to throw 'em off for life. His faceradiant, and hummin' _sotey vosey_ his favorite ballad: "Hum agin, hum agin, from a furren shore. " Arvilly looked happy to agin touch the sile of home, and be able, asshe said, to "tend to her things. " And wuz not I happy? I who loved mycountry with the jealous love that makes a ma spank her boy forcuttin' up. Is it love that makes a ma stand by, and see her boy turnsummer sets and warhoop in meetin'-houses? Nay, verily, every spankthat makes him behave is a touching evidence of her warm devotion. I felt as I stood on the beloved sile of home (better sile and richerthan any other), beneath its bright sunshine (warmer and brighter thanany other sunshine) I felt that I loved my country with thatpassionate, jealous love that could never be contented till she risesup to the full glory she might and will have. When she sweeps her longstrong arms round and brushes off vile politicians and time-servers, and uses a pure free ballot to elect good men and good wimmen to makegood laws, then will come the Golden Age that I look for, and thatwill come, when Justice will take her bandages off, and look out withboth eyes over a prosperous and happy land. God speed the day! We parted with the children here, they goin' to their own homes, afterpromisin' to come and see me and their pa very soon. Tommy throwed hisarms round my neck and said he should stay with us half the time. Wewant him to. Well, Ury met us with the mair and warm smiles of welcome, andPhilury greeted us with joyous smiles and a good warm meat supper. They set store by us, lots of store, and when we gin 'em the presentswe had brung for 'em from foreign shores, happiness seemed toradiate from 'em like light and warmth from the sun. Josiah enjoyedhis supper--yes, indeed--his liniment shone with satisfaction as hesot at the table in his stockin' feet and shirt sleeves, and eatmore than wuz good for him, fur more. He had begun to onbend, and Iknew that for days I couldn't keep clothes enough on him to behardly decent, but knew also that that would wear away in time. Feelin' first-rate when we got home, it only took us a short time torest and recooperate from our tower, and receive calls from thechildren and grandchildren and Jonesvillians. And the children helpedPhilury and me to git the house all in order, and prepare forThanksgiving. I sent out invitations for a party; I laid out to inviteall my own dear ones, old and young, Elder Minkley and his wife, Arvilly, and how I did want to invite Ernest White and Waitstill Webb, but he wuz away on a long vacation, and Waitstill I hadn't hearn fromfor weeks, she wuz in the Philippines the last I hearn. I wanted to invite all the brethern and sistern in the meetin'-house, but Philury thought she couldn't wait on 'em all, and we compromisedon the plan of havin' 'em all here to a evenin' social the weekafter, when we'd pass round things and not have so many dishes towash. I laid out to be dretful thankful Thanksgivin' day. I felt that myheart would keep the holiday with drums beatin' and flags wavin', tospeak in metafor. For how much, how much I had to be thankful for! Mybeloved pardner and I had reached our own home in safety. The Lord hadwatched over us in perils by water, perils by land, perils by fatigue, perils by Josiah's strange, strange plans. Tommy wuz as well as ever a child wuz; the doctor said his lungs wuzsound as a bell. All our dear ones at home had been kep' in safety andour home seemed more like a blissful oasis in a desert world than itever did before. I always like to be up to the mark in everything, and I felt that Ihad so much to be thankful for Thanksgivin' day that I laid out to gitup early so's to begin to be thankful as soon as daylight anyway, andkeep it up all day till long after candle light. But as it turned outI begun to keep the glorious holiday of Thanksgivin' three days aheadand had to, for I couldn't help it. I believe in makin' preparations ahead; I believe in takin' time bythe forelock and leadin' it along peaceable and stiddy by my side, instead of time's drivin' me, rough shod and pantin' for breath over ahousehold path, rocky and rough with belated duties. And it wuz threedays before Thanksgivin' I sot in my clean, cheerful-lookin' kitchenseedin' some raisins for the fruit cake, Josiah bein' out to the barnkillin' two fat pullets for the chicken pie. Ury wuz down in the swampgittin' some evergreens and holly berries to decorate with, andPhilury dressin' the turkey and ducks in the back kitchen, when Iheard a rap at the settin' room door and I wiped my hands on theroller towel and smoothed back my hair and went to the door. And who do you spoze stood there? His eyes shinin' brighter than thesky did, though that wuz clear blue, lit by a warm sunshine. It wuzErnest White, and guess who wuz by his side; I'll tell you, for younever could think who it wuz--it wuz Waitstill Webb. I had thought herface wuz as sweet as it could be in sorrow, but I had never seen it ingladness before. She looked like a sweet white rose just blowed outunder the warm sun of a perfect June day. "Ernest White!" sez I, "how glad I am to see you! And Waitstill Webb!can I believe my eyes?" sez I, "is it you?" And I took both theirhands in mine at one time. "Waitstill Webb!" sez I agin, "is it you?" "No, " sez Ernest White, "it is Waitstill White. " You could have knocked me down with a hair-pin. I kissed 'em bothsmilin' and weepin', laughin' and cryin', we all on us wuz like threefools, or three wise ones, I d'no which. And that's how I begun tokeep Thanksgivin' more'n three days ahead. They come right into the kitchen and made me keep on with my work, which I did after a little, they takin' holt and helpin' me like twohappy children. They stayed most all the forenoon, but had promised togo back to Arvilly's to dinner. Well! Well! I hadn't been so tickled in matrimonial ways and riz upand routed and dumb foundered since Thomas J. And Maggie Snow gotengaged. It seems that Ernest White had gone way out to thePhilippines after her, and they wuz married in a little Americanchapel by a missionary of the M. E. Meetin'-house. They wuz goin' right to housekeeping in the widder Pooler's, wherehe had boarded. The widder had gone to live with her daughter, Mahala, in Michigan, and Ernest White has bought it. It stands in a prettyplace near a evergreen grove, just on the edge of Loontown nearhis people that he loves, and has gin his life work to make better. And, oh, what a sweet love-guarded home Waitstill White is goin' tomake for her pardner, and how happy Ernest White is goin' to bewith the woman he loves. For besides bein' so congenial and beloved, Waitstill is as good a cook as I ever see, and no matter how much aman's soul soars up to the heavens, whilst his body is on earth hewill always appreciate good vittles. Love never did nor never willthrive on a empty stummick. Harmony of soul is delightful, and perfectcongeniality is sweet, and so is good yeast emtin' bread if it ismade right, kneaded three times, riz in a cool place and baked to aturn. And tender broiled chops and chicken, and hot muffins andfragrant coffee has some the effect on the manly breast of love'syoung dream. Waitstill is a real home lover and homemaker. And it seems that by heradvice Ernest White had had alterations in the house made that Iapproved highly on when I see 'em, and they had ordered lots of thingsto be sent from the city to make it pleasant, all put in first-rateorder by the man left in charge, and they invited Josiah and me totake tea with 'em the very next evenin' and go to meetin' with 'em, which we gladly accepted, seein' we had got our preparations so furalong; Arvilly wuz goin' to be there they said. And, of course, Iinvited 'em to my Thanksgivin' dinner, which they accepted with thesame pleasure that we had theirn. CHAPTER XXXVI Well, the next day, or ruther that night I begun to make preparationsto go to Waitstill White's. I got a early supper that night so's togit to bed early so's to git up in good season; so's to git a earlybreakfast the next mornin', so's to git a early dinner, so's to startin good season for Ernest and Waitstill White's. And I kep' sayin'that over and over the next mornin', "Ernest and Waitstill White's, "it sounded dretful good to me, dretful. I sez to Philury, "We must have dinner early, for we are invited toErnest and Waitstill White's. " And I sez the same to Josiah. And he sez, "You've said that to me adozen times already. " "Well, " sez I cheerfully, "mebby I shall say it a dozen times more. " I felt well, dretful well in my mind. It had come out just as I hadhoped and prayed for, and why shouldn't I feel good. Well, they greeted us with warm affection. And you don't know howpretty their home looked. It had been fixed up in their absence andWaitstill had put the finishin' touches to it when she come. It wuz agloomy spot under the Pooler regeem. But Waitstill wuz a truehomemaker and could make a barn seem home like, as folks can that havethat gift. You often see folks who think, or say they think, that oneset of faculties henders another set from workin'. But it hain't nosuch thing. Miss Pooler wuz nothin' but a housekeeper, and as poor aone at that as you would be apt to find in a day's travel, whilstWaitstill wuz a philanthropist, a missionary, an angel on earth ifever there wuz one, and a homemaker and a home lover added to it, just as the Bible sez: "Seek first the kingdom of heaven and all thesethings shall be added unto you, " or words to that effect. The settin'-room and parlor that used to seem like a dark-greencurtained mausoleum, sacred to the mournin' pieces on the wall, andthe hair wreaths of defunct Poolers wuz now the sunshinny hant ofBeauty and Cheerfulness. Bay windows bordered with soft-colored glass, and curtained with fleecy white, let the sunshine stream into thepretty, freshly-decorated room, where it seemed to love to stay andshine. A conservatory full of blossoming plants made the settin' anddinin'-rooms full of cheer and perfume. One good stout German girl bore willin'ly the heaviest burdens ofhousekeeping, but Waitstill and Love and Good Judgment wuz to thehellum, and the result wuz beautiful. A happier household I don't wantto see, a better supper I don't want to eat. Waitstill had some briledchicken, tender and toothsome, some creamed potatoes, fixed justright, light white rolls, yellow sweet butter made from their ownJersey cow's milk, clear amber honey from their own beehives, slicedpeaches from their own peach trees (it wuz a late kind, each onerolled up in newspapers, and put in a box in the suller and kep' andpurple and white grapes kep' in the same way). Some pound cake madefrom my own reseet, a noble one that fell onto me from Mother Allen, and improved on by me, and some angel cake, made by Waitstill herself, and as snowy and delicious as if it wuz made by a real angel withwings, some fragrant coffee with rich cream to make it delicious, andchocolate for them that preferred it. A big glass bowl of roses andcarnations wuz in the centre, and the table wuz spread with a snowylinen cloth, and sot with beautiful china, white with a gold and pinksprig on it, part of a big quantity sent by his rich folks, who wuzdelighted to have him marry such a sweet girl and settle down, and theheavy shinin' silver marked "W. W. W. , " lookin' some like a runnin'vine, and the glossy linen tablecloths and napkins looking like satincovered with posies, come from the same source, also marked with herinitials. Enough, Waitstill told me, to last 'em all their lives ifthey should live to be as old as Methusaler and his wife. Well, I wuz glad enough to see their prosperity and happiness and whenErnest White sot to his own table by the side of Waitstill White andin a few short, eloquent, heart-felt words asked the Lord's blessingon this new home consecrated to his service, and on his dear friendshappily returned home agin, my heart echoed every word and therewuzn't a dry eye in my head, not one. After supper wuz over we sot out to go to the meetin' he had spoke on. It wuz the openin' night of the new library, which wuz in a prettylittle buildin' jined onto the meetin'-house and only a few minutes'walk from Ernest and Waitstill White's. There wuz a good, large room for the library filled with good bookshelpful and inspirin', bought partly by Ernest White and partly byvoluntary contributions by his people, a reading-room filled withmagazines and newspapers and which with the library wuz to be openedevery evening and two afternoons in the weeks. And there wuz a cozylittle settin'-room and bed-room with a kitchen back out for thelibrarian. And who do you spoze wuz to be librarian and live hereclost to her idol? Oh, shaw! I might just as well told you right outas to have said that; it wuz Arvilly. It wuz congenial work to her andleft her plenty of time to go round canvassin' if she wanted to. We wuz a little late for the meetin', for a man come to see the Elderjust as we wuz startin', about marryin' him the next day, and asanybody knows that has to be tended to 'tennyrate. As we drawed nigh the library and meetin'-house we see they wuzlighted up in as friendly and pleasant a way as if they wuz twobeacons set up to light our footsteps. And as we went in we see agroup of happy faced young people gathered round the organ practicin'a piece they wuz learnin' for Thanksgivin'. It wuz a sweet song of thankfulness and peace, filled with gratitudefor all the blessin's of the year. A sweet song full of love to Godand man and that would be apt to inspire the singers and hearers withforbearance, justice, mercy, sane living and thinking. In another partof the hall they wuz practicing some pretty pieces to speak at thiscelebration, but when Elder White went in they all met him joyfully asa beloved father is met by his children, and they bestowed a lovinggreeting on Waitstill too. These young men and women wuz ready to look through the magnifyin'glass of love at any lesson Ernest White should set before them to fit'em for life's battle. The meeting that night wuz a sort of a social, where the young andolder folks met to get better acquainted with each other, and had agood time visitin' back and forth and comparin' notes and bein'introduced to Waitstill and the new library. One attracted just aboutas much attention as the other, both wuz exceedingly interestin' to'em and beloved. Elder Cross wuz there, he sets store by Ernest White, though he is sodifferent from him. He is good natered and a Christian, I believe, though Arvilly said he would have to be fixed over quite a good dealbefore he got into the Kingdom. And I sez, "Well, we all shall, Arvilly. " "Ernest White won't, " sez she, "all they will have to do to him willbe to tack on a pair of wings and pin his crown on. He's a saint onearth now, " sez she. Well, Elder Cross come up to Arvilly and welcomed her home and said afew words about Ernest White's overwhelmin' success, which heconsidered a mericale, and he couldn't understand it. "Well, I can understand it, " sez Arvilly, "I have always said that nopower could stand before the Church of Christ when it is fullyawakened to the enormity of the sin it is encouraging by itsindifference and neglect, and bands itself together to fight againstit. The saloon votes solid, " sez Arvilly, "they are faithful to theircause, they are fiery hot with zeal, the church a good many of 'em arelukewarm, some like the Laodocians, and some like dish-water ready tobe emptied down into the drain. America is ruled by her cities, andthey are ruled by the saloon and unrighteous trusts and politicalbosses. Foreigners from the old world slums flaunt the banner ofindependence in the face of American womanhood. And the church of Godthat might remedy the evils lets 'em go on. " Sez Elder Cross, "I know well that the saloon is a mighty power forevil, it ruins our youth, soul and body, and I know that Monopoly isthe thief that steals the rewards of labor. But I pray, sisterArvilly, I pray without ceasing that the Holy Spirit will come down, and smite these offenders. " Sez Arvilly the dantless one, "You don't depend on prayer alone inyour church services, in taking up collections, etc. , or in worldlyaffairs, " (Elder Cross is real rich, he keeps a hen dairy). Sez Arvilly, "If you should depend on prayer alone to keep your bigshanghai rooster from fightin' the little bantys I guess you would beapt to have considerable of a wake in your hen-yard. And you don'tkneel down and shet your eyes and pray for your young turkeys andchickens when a pair of big wicked hawks are swoopin' down on 'em or aheavy thunder-storm comin' on. No, you drive your little onprotectedbroods into the first shelter you can find and go at the old hawkswith a club. Not that I approve of fightin', " sez Arvilly, "but thereis a time to pray and a time to use a horsewhip; our Lord, who was andis our divine example, prayed thy kingdom come, and then helped it tocome by driving out the money-changers, and them that defiled thetemple. He might have prayed for them to be driv out and then foldedhis hands and waited for the millennium. But He didn't, nor He didn'tsay that human nature wuz too hard to handle, and that evil things hadgot to be changed gradual. He didn't take their rich gifts, He didn'tmake 'em church wardens, nor hang their pictures up in college hallsto stimulate young men to go and do likewise. And that is whatministers of our Lord and his disciples want to do to-day, to driveout of the temple and the country the fat thieves that infest it, andthe sanctified rascals wearin' sheep's clothin'. They have got apowerful whip in a consecrated ballot that will drive the thieves outand make them disgorge their ill-gotten gains. " Elder Cross wuz agitated; the argument wuz driving him into a cornerwhere he didn't want to stand; he turned the conversation: "This is a great work dear brother White is doing, but some criticisethe idea of his opening the house of God every evening for amusementsas well as prayer. Some don't believe in mingling secular things withsacred. " Sez Arvilly, "What is more sacred to the Lord than a saved soul, alost one redeemed, a prodigal brought back. What headway is one churchopened three hours a week goin' to make aginst twenty saloons openevery day and night. " Arvilly begun to be powerful agitated and Ispoke up quick, for I knew how hash she wuz when she got to goin', andI didn't want this beautiful day marred by hashness even if it wuzdeserved. Sez I, "We all know how much good the church has done in the past. Andnow that the churches are beginning to band themselves together, andvote as they pray, this enormous force of righteousness is going to bevictorious over sin and darkness, and the Saloon and the Canteen, thelicensed houses of shame, monument of woman's degradation, the unjustmonopoly, the high fence separating the few enormously rich from themasses of the suffering, starving poor, will all have to fall. Christdid not die in vain, " sez I, "nor the blood of the martyrs has notbeen in vain. The Lord has promised and he will fulfill. " "God speed that day!" sez Elder Cross shettin' his eyes and claspin'his hands. "Amen!" sez I. But I hearn Arvilly behind me mutter, "You'll have to open your oldeyes, Elder, and go to work, or you won't have much hand in it. " But I guess he didn't hear her. Well, goin' home that night, my heart sung for joy a anthem, more thana ordinary sam tune. The bright moonlight rested on the democrat andmy pardner, and gilded the way in front of us, and further off wecould see it lay on the lake, and it seemed to make a silver path onit. Life seemed worth livin', the cold waves of death seemed lit upwith a heavenly glow, the hosts of evil seemed to back off before theAngel of Deliverance. I don't spoze that from Maine to Florida, or from Jonesville to SanFrancisco there wuz a happier Thanksgivin' party than we had. Havin'such sights and sights of things to be thankful for, I laid out as Isay to begin to be thankful before candle light in the mornin' andkeep it up all day long till bed time, and so I did. It wuz a lovely day, the sun shone into our bedroom winder through thebeautiful knit fringe, made by my own hands, and rested on me lovin'lyas I combed my hair in front of the lookin'-glass. There had been afall of snow the night before, as if nater had done her best for theoccasion and spread her white ermine down for the feet of the angel, Thanksgivin'. Philury got breakfast most ready by candle light, and I'd been bein'thankful ever since she put the tea kettle over. "Josiah, " sez I, "do you realize what a glorious day this is and howmuch, how much we have to be thankful for?" He had broke one of his shue strings and wuz bent down breathin'kinder hard and tusslin' with it and his answer wuzn't what I couldwished it wuz. But I knowed that it wuz because the blood had rushedto his head. He got it tied up in a few minutes and eat his breakfastwith a splendid appetite. Philury had good tender lamb chops and bakedpotatoes and light muffins and a fragrant cup of coffee, and Josiahrecovered his usual flow of sperits before we got half through. And weread together a chapter out of The Book, and Josiah made a prayer fullof thankfulness that come from his very heart for the blessings ofhome and love and all the precious gifts the Father bestowed on usdurin' the year. The children come early and brought some lovely presents to us. Wemake a practice of givin' presents in our own family Thanksgivin', forit always seemed so kinder appropriate that while we wuz givin' thankswe might just as well give a few more. And their presents to us wuzjust what we wanted and ourn to them proved to be just what theywanted. Of course it wuzn't all a happen; we had throwed out hints andperspected round as well as we could before we selected 'em, kinderthrowed out the line of wonder and surmises, and ketched opinions andwishes on it. At ten A. M. We all got into two big sleighs and went to Jonesville tomeetin'. It wuz a union meetin' and Elder White wuz chose to preachthe Thanksgivin' sermon. It wuz a beautiful discourse, it come fromthe depths of a thankful, lovin' Christian heart and went right toourn. The party I had invited went home with us from the meetin'-house, Philury had the house all warm and it wuzn't long before we had dinnerready, of course we had got everything cooked we could the daybefore. The dinner, though of course I ortn't to say it, but they all said, and of course it must be so, they said it wuz the best Thanksgivin'dinner that wuz ever cooked in this world, and Josiah whispered to meas he helped himself to the third helpin' of turkey and dressin', thathe knowed that there never wuz such a meal cooked in Jupiter or Marsor any other planet. But I whispered back, it wuzn't safe to say such things, sez I. "Mostprobably they have many and lots of things we don't know anythingabout. " "Manny!" sez he, "how would manny show off by the side of thisdressin'?" and he took another spunful. I spoze my dressin' duz go ahead of most, though it hain't made mehauty. Well, how happy everybody wuz; how good they looked to me and Ito them, I knew it by their liniments. How the children doted on meand their Pa, how dear little Tommy hung round us. How softened downArvilly wuz by her happiness in havin' Waitstill back agin, but stillshe kep' her faculties from rustin', and sold two books that day forpresents, and one to Elder Minkley for a Sabbath School prize. How adorable Waitstill looked in her pretty cashmere gown of paleviolet color with white roses at her bosom and belt, she had throwedoff her black as a reasonable widder should, I never approved ofmournin' for one man whilst weddin' another, that is mournin' inpublic in crape and weeds. I don't believe she had a black rag on her, she might you know if she had been sly have put a black bindin' on herpetticoat or a black pocket. I remember the Widder Doodle did, but Inever approved of it. No, mournin' weeds are right in their place, andorange blossoms in theirn, but I never believed in mixin' the two. Down deep in Waitstill's heart, hid from every eye but the one whomade that heart, wuz a place where her thought must retire into nowand then and weep. Yes, I knowed that whilst her loyal love andrespect and reverence wuz all given to the man she loved, who wuzstrong, her thought would anon or oftener have to go into that sombryroom and weep for the young lover who wuz weak, but whose weaknesswould never have blossomed into crime had not his country hung theSodom apple before his eyes and his weak appetite yielded to it, hadoverthrown the labor and efforts of years, tempted him with lowtemptations that had been stronger than love, stronger than religion, stronger than life. All his life long he had fought against inheritedtastes as they fought with wild beasts at Ephesus, and he would havecome off conqueror had it not been for licensed evils and theweaknesses in high and low places that permitted it to be. Yes, into that closely locked, sombry chamber I knowed that Waitstillwould go alone and stay there for quite a spell. But after a time Imistrusted the sweet peace and happiness of her life would be suchthat she would go seldomer and make shorter visits when she did go. And its black gloom would be lighted by tones of living love andgleams of light and warmth from tender eyes. And I hoped that the timewould come when dimpled baby fingers would gently bar the doorway andshe wouldn't go there to stay for any length of time. Well, the happy company stayed till nine P. M. , when they departed withmany pleasant and loving words, I being thankful every minute of thetime, even when I see 'em drive off. You know sometimes as glad as youare to have company, and as well as you like 'em, you are kinder gladto set down quiet, and think over all the happy time, and rest yourhead. Well, the next day after Thanksgivin', early in the afternoon, Josiahsaid he had got to go over to Jonesville, and proposed that I shouldride over with him. He said the mair kinder needed shuein', and sezhe, "We might bring Tommy home with us, for there wuzn't any schoolSaturday, and he could stay over Sunday with us. " It duz seem now as if we can't help settin' a little more store byTommy than we do by the other grandchildren. But it better not be toldI said it, it would make feelin's amongst the rest. Well, we made lovely calls on the children, and got Tommy, who wuzmore than willin' to come, and returned home about ten a. M. , Tommysettin' between us and drivin' the mair, Thomas J. And Maggie sayin'they would drive over Sunday night after him and take tea with us. We stopped at the post-office, and Tommy run in and got three lettersfor me, two on 'em which I opened and read when I first got home, whilst Josiah and Tommy drove over to Deacon Henzy's on a errent. As Isay I read two on 'em, but of the third one more anon. One of myletters wuz from Cousin John Richard, who had gone back to Victorworkin' for his Lord in his own appointed way, teachin' the young, comfortin' the aged, and exhortin' the strong, helpin' to bear theburdens of the weak, and doin' it all in the name of Him who isinvisible, waitin' patient till the summons should be sent him to gohome to his own land, for the Bible sez that "them that do such thingsshow plainly that they seek a country. " Fur acrost that dark continent from another oasis like Victorbeginnin' to be illuminated with the white light beamin' from theuplifted cross, come a message to me from another consecratedmissionary and child of Heaven, Evangeline Noble. She told me of theblessed work she wuz doin' in Africa and how happy she wuz in it, forher Master wuz with her tellin' her what to do from day to day, andshe happy in carryin' out that work and seein' the light from heavenstream into dark minds and souls. How much store I set by her, I lay out to send her a barrel of thingsthis fall, some dried apples, canned fruit, good books, a piece of ragcarpet and a crazy quilt, not rarin' ravin' crazy, but sort o'beautifully delerious, embroidered with cat stitch round every block. And the other letter wuz from Miss Meechim. I read Cousin JohnRichard's and Evangeline's, but I put hern on the mantletry piece andthought I wouldn't read it till about a hour after dinner, mistrustin'that it would agitate and work me up, so that my food wouldn't setgood. Dorothy's marriage to Robert Strong had took place a week before, butnot a word had I heard from Miss Meechim, and I didn't know whateffect the blow had had on her. Josiah and I had been warmly invitedto attend the weddin', but not feelin' willin' to embark on anothertower we sent her a pretty present and love, lots and lots of love, and the earnest best wishes of our hearts. They wuz married in Dorothy's home in San Francisco, and wentimmegiately after the ceremony to their new home in the City ofJustice to begin their life work there. Dorothy had writ me all theparticulars of their marriage. They didn't want any show and displayshe said, and they took the money they would have had to spend to makea big wedding with a crowd of guests, elaborate dressing, rich viands, music, flowers, etc. They took this money and gave a holiday to thechildren in the City of Justice, a beautiful dinner, music and giftsfor all. And they wuz married in a plain, quiet way in the presence of a fewrelatives and close friends, she dressed in a pretty white muslin (andlookin' sweet as a rose I knew, though, of course, she didn't say so). And after a simple lunch, they drove out to their new home. But Ihearn, and it come straight, too, that the children of the City ofJustice, just worshippin' Robert Strong as they did, they all on 'emdressed in white, their pretty heads crowned with roses, filledbaskets with the sweetest flowers they could find and went out to meetthe young couple beyend the gate. And as they approached, they met 'emwith rejoicing songs sung in their sweet clear voices and scatteredroses and sweet posies in their path, their bright, happy eyes andsmilin' lips givin' 'em just as sweet a greetin'. And as they entered into the city at sunset, the workmen met 'em alldressed in holiday attire, and their cheers and blessings followed thecarriage till they reached their own door, which wuz banked up withodorous blossoms as high as ever a snow drift blocked up the houses inJonesville, and they had to fairly wade through the sweet posies togit to their door. So, surrounded and blessed with love and rejoicings rising fromgrateful adoring hearts, Robert and Dorothy Strong begun their marriedlife. Love and Mercy standin' right by their sides like maids ofhonor, and Honesty and Justice like usher and best man, usherin' 'eminto a useful and happy life of work and toil sweetened forever withgratitude and love. Lovin' each other as dearly as ever a man andwoman did, lovin' their Lord supremely and showing that love in theway He bade his disciples to in caring for and blessing humanity. Theybegun that day a power of helpful inspiring influences that wouldbless the world, go through life with 'em and wait on 'em clearthrough the swellin' flood and lead 'em up onto the other shore fromtheir City of Justice and love here, to that sweet continuing City ofRest and Reward. I felt well about Robert and Dorothy--yes, my heart sung for Joycarryin' the hull four parts, base, altore, bear tone and sulfireno. That is to say, the different faculties of my head and heart all jinedin and sung together in happiness and made a full orkestry. You know when you hear of some marriages a part of you is pleased, mebby it is Common Sense, whilst Romance and Fancy has to set dumb anddemute. Or mebby Fancy sings whilst cold Reason is spreadin' a wetblanket on her part of the band, chillin' the notes and spilein' theinstrument. But here Reason, Romance, Love and Common Sense all jinedin together and sung the wedding anthem loud and clear. But Miss Meechim, I felt dubersome about her; Dorothy didn't mentionher in her letter, bein' so took up with Robert and Love, so I spozed. I knowed well how repugnant matrimony wuz to her and how sternlyresolved she wuz that Dorothy should go through life a bachelor maid. I hated to read Miss Meechim's letter, I dreaded it like a dog. Howdid I know but her great disappointment and crushin' grief to see herhull life work smashed and demolished, had smit her down, and she hadpassed away writin' my name on a envelope with her last flicker oflife and some stranger pen had writ me of the tragedy. I put the letter up on the mantletry piece and thought I wouldn't readit till about a hour after dinner. And whilst I wuz gittin' dinner and eatin' it and went about doin' upmy work afterwards, I eyed that letter some as a cat eyes a dog kenneland hung off from readin' it. But wantin' to git the hard job overbefore night sot in, about the middle of the afternoon I read a fewverses of Foxe's Book of Martyrs, put two cushions in the rockin'chair, took a swaller of spignut and thorough-o'-wort to kinder holdup my strength, and a few whiffs of camfire, and then I put on mynear-to specs, opened the letter with a deep sithe and begun to read. But good land! I needn't have foreboded so; I might have knowed thatthough her hatred of matrimony wuz great, her egotism and self esteemwuz bigger yet. The letter stated in glowin' terms her gratefulness to her Creator tothink she had a nephew so bound up in her interest and welfare. Shesaid that she had mentioned one day, durin' a severe attack ofbilerous colic her fears and forebodin's about Dorothy's future if sheshould succumb to the colic and leave her alone. She said that itwuzn't a week after this that her nephew and Dorothy had confided toher the fact of their engagement. Sez she, "Not one word to Dorothy have I mentioned or ever shallmention as to Robert's reasons for sacrificin' himself to ease mymind, and make me more care free. I wouldn't for the world, " sez she, "have Dorothy suspect why Robert has made a martyr of himself, and tono one but you, Josiah Allen's wife, " sez she, "shall I ever breatheit. " But she felt that she could confide in me, and wanted me to knowjust how it wuz. So her colossial self esteem carried her through safely, and she wuzas happy as any on 'em. She wuz goin' to live in a little house Roberthad bought for her in San Francisco. Martha, the steady English maid, wuz goin' to live with her, as she had proved faithful. And she addeda few heart breakin' words of grief and mournfulness about our dearlost Aronette. And she gin me to understand that sence Aronette's dretful death inNew York she had gradually changed her mind about drinking. I believe Arvilly's talk helped convince her, though Miss Meechimwould never own it to her dyin' day, and I d'no as Arvilly would wanther to, they just naterally abominate each other. But 'tennyrate she said she felt that nothing that could lead on tothat awful termination and terrible tragedy, could be called genteel. And she said she had had a argument with Rev. Mr. Weakdew, in whichthey had both got genteelly angry (tearin' mad I should call it fromwhat she told me of their interview). But I will pass over particularswhich filled eight pages of large note paper, the upshot bein' thatshe had left his church for good and all, and jined a Temperancemission church down in the city. And she wuz now writin' tracts toprove that intemperance wuz the beast with seven horns mentioned inScripture. Good land! it has got more than seven horns, I believe, and all of 'emdagger sharp and wet with tears and heart's blood. She expected, she said, that these tracts would make a end to theliquor power and the social evil, and temperance would rain in theworld some time durin' the comin' fall. But they won't. These evils are sot too firm on American soil, it willtake a greater power than Miss Meechim's tracts to upheave 'em. But Iam glad she is sot that way, for every little helps, and the breath ofMiss Meechim's converted soul is blowin' the right way and when thehull Christian world shall be converted, the united influence willmove along a mighty overwhelmin' power that will sweep these ungodlyevils from the face of the earth. Then will come the golden days ofpeace, righteousness, the reign of the Lord Jesus, for which we prayevery day when we say "Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth asit is in Heaven. " A FEW FROM HUNDREDS OF PRESS NOTICES OF SAMANTHA AT THE ST. LOUIS EXPOSITION by JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE--(Marietta Holley) Few characters of fiction will live longer than Samantha. A fund ofold-fashioned, homely but decidedly sound philosophy, yet an eye forthe facetious phases of human nature, witty as well as philosophical. Older readers can remember a few who have pleased for a time and beenforgotten, and the few in recent years like David Harum and EbenHolden have been most enthusiastically appreciated. The philosophy ofSamantha is broader and deeper than any of these characters. Herinsight when dealing with hidden motives is sharper and her witkeener. It is not surprising that the character has so long stood thetest of time, and that a new book from the author is regarded as animportant event in the book world. _Pittsburg Press_ Those who went to the St. Louis Exposition--and those who wished tobut did not, can have a good souvenir of the great show, and anaccount of it that will be interesting years hence as now, in"Samantha at the St. Louis Exposition. " Samantha and Josiah went to the Fair, "took it all in, " and Samantharelates their experiences in her well-known quaint style. Thecharacteristic illustrations of their adventures by C. Grunwald aregreat. _Cleveland Plain Dealer_ The main points of interest at the Exposition are discussed andmoralized over in her inimitable way by Samantha. _The Outlook_ Samantha at the St. Louis Exposition, by Josiah Allen's wife, is arevival of what was perhaps one of the most popular humorous seriesever issued. The present volume contains the same pathos and shrewdrustic sense with all the humor of her previous works. _Baker & Taylor's Monthly Bulletin of Best Selling Books_ She has sampled the glories of the St. Louis Fair and described themin language of enduring worth. _Boston Advertiser_ A story full of the mixture of wit, pathos, eloquence and commonsense. _New York Globe_ Very unlike her earlier books in appearance. It has a smart up-to-datebinding and striking modern illustrations by Grunwald. But MissHolley's part is perfectly natural and familiar. It has lost none ofits mirth, none of its common sense, none of its good clear-eyedreligious way of looking at things. It is faithful to the spirit of agreat deal that is best in American life. _Syracuse Post Standard_ G. W. DILLINGHAM COMPANY PUBLISHERS--NEW YORK WHAT THE CRITICS SAY OF SAMANTHA AT THE ST. LOUIS EXPOSITION By CYRUS TOWNSEND BRADY _The New York Tribune_ says--and it is true--that "Mr. Brady is fondof dashing themes and certainly here he has found a subject to suithis most exacting mood. He has taken a rascal for the hero of hispicaresque and rattling romance. The author is lavish in incident andhandles one thrilling situation after another with due sense of allthe dramatic force that is to be got out of it. His description of thelast moments of the old pirate is one of the most effective pieces ofwriting he has put to his credit. SIR HENRY MORGAN--BUCCANEER is anabsorbing story. " "Cyrus Townsend Brady has had the hardihood to set aside the romanticpirate of fictional tradition and paint a genuine historic pirate;lustful, murderous, brutal, relentless. The story has force anddramatic interest. "--_The Lamp. _ "Mr. Brady has never before been so successful in creating a characterwho so completely fills the scene. Morgan dominates the book from thefirst line to the last. "--_Philadelphia Item. _ "The story is a fascinating one--a concentration of all the piratestories that ever were written. "--_Rochester Herald. _ "Mr. Brady has a graphic and realistic power of description. The novelis full measure and running over with thrills. "--_Brooklyn Eagle. _ "A thrilling pirate story, a lively romance sufficiently sensationalyet not lacking in delicacy. "--_Boston Transcript. _ "The story is full of incident and has an appropriate measure of loveand sword play. "--_N. Y. Times. _ "It is as rakish and dashing a craft on seas literary as any of thehero's black-flagged ships on seas actual. "--_N. Y. World. _ "There is 'hot stuff' in SIR HENRY MORGAN--BUCCANEER. "--_N. Y. EveningSun. _ "The interest of the action, pitched high in the beginning, is held tothe point of utmost tension throughout. "--_St. Louis Star. _ _Profusely and beautifully illustrated from paintings by J. N. Marchand and drawings by Will Crawford. Cloth-bound, $1. 50. _ Sold Everywhere, or Sent Postpaid Free on Receipt of Price. G. W. DILLINGHAM CO. , Publishers, NEW YORK NEW BOOKS AND NEW EDITIONS JOHN MARSH'S MILLIONS A novel by CHARLES KLEIN and ARTHUR HORNBLOW 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. NEW FACES A volume of eight stories by MYRA KELLY These stories first publishedin the _Saturday Evening Post_, _Woman's Home Companion_ and_Appleton's Magazine_, now in book form. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. THE HOUSE ON STILTS A novel by R. H. HAZARD 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. BUCKY O'CONNOR A novel by WM. M. RAINE, author of "Wyoming, " etc. 12mo. Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. CHILDREN OF DESTINY A play in four acts by SYDNEY ROSENFELD. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 00. Paper covers, 50 cents. THE PEACOCK OF JEWELS A detective story by FERGUS HUME 12mo, Cloth. $1. 25. THE SILVER KING Novelized from the great play by ALFRED WILSON BARRETT 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. TINSEL AND GOLD A new novel by DION CLAYTON CALTHROP, author of "Everybody's Secret. "12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. THE RED FLAG By GEORGES OHNET, author of "The Ironmaster. " A powerfully dramaticstory of the conflict between master and men. 12mo, Cloth. $1. 50. THE EDDY A novel by CLARENCE L. CULLEN Illustrated by Ch. Weber Ditzler. 12mo, Cloth. $1. 50. IN OLD KENTUCKY A novel founded on the famous play. By EDWARD MARSHALL 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. REDCLOUD OF THE LAKES By FREDERICK R. BURTON author of "Strongheart. " 12mo. Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. BY RIGHT OF CONQUEST A powerful romantic novel. By ARTHUR HORNBLOW, author of Novel "TheLion and the Mouse, " "The End of the Game, " "The Profligate, " etc. 12mo. Cloth bound. Illustrated. $1. 50. WHEN I AM RICH By ROY MASON 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated $1. 50. THE CITY OF SPLENDID NIGHT A novel. By JOHN W. HARDING, author of "Paid In Full, " etc. 12mo. Cloth bound. Illustrated. $1. 50. THE THOROUGHBRED A novel. By EDITH MACVANE. 12mo, Cloth bound. Illustrated. $1. 50. BELLES, BEAUX AND BRAINS OF THE 60'S By T. C. DE LEON. 8vo, Cloth bound, with one hundred and fiftyhalf-tone portraits. Net, $3. 00. THE WARRENS OF VIRGINIA By GEORGE GARY EGGLESTON. 12mo. Cloth bound. Illustrated. $1. 50. TRUE DETECTIVE STORIES By A. L. DRUMMOND. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. ARTEMUS WARD Complete Comic Writings. 12mo, Cloth. $2. 00. JOSH BILLINGS Complete Comic Writings. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $2. 00. STRONGHEART Novelized from WM. C. DE MILLE'S Popular Play, by F. R. BURTON. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. GERTRUDE ELLIOT'S CRUCIBLE By MRS. GEORGE SHELDON DOWNS, author of "Katherine's Sheaves. " 12mo, Cloth bound. Illustrated. $1. 50. STEP BY STEP By MRS. GEORGE SHELDON DOWNS. 12mo, Cloth bound. Illustrated. $1. 50. KATHERINE'S SHEAVES By MRS. GEORGE SHELDON DOWNS. Illustrated. Popular Edition, 50 cents. THE LAND OF FROZEN SUNS A novel by B. W. SINCLAIR, author of "Raw Gold, " etc. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. JOHN HOLDEN, UNIONIST A Romance of the Days of Destruction and Reconstruction. By T. C. DELEON. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. CRAG-NEST A Romance of Sheridan's Ride. By T. C. DE LEON, 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 25. THE LOSING GAME A novel by WILL PAYNE. Expanded from the serial recently issued in the_Saturday Evening Post_. Illustrations by F. R. Gruger. 12mo, Cloth. $1. 50. THE SINS OF SOCIETY A novel founded on the successful Drury Lane drama by CECIL RALEIGH. 12mo, Cloth. $1. 50. THE THIRD DEGREE By CHARLES KLEIN and ARTHUR HORNBLOW, authors of "The Lion and theMouse. " 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated, $1. 50. SAMANTHA ON CHILDREN'S RIGHTS By MARIETTA HOLLEY, 8vo, Cloth. Illustrations by Chas. Grunwald. $1. 50. THE WRITING ON THE WALL A novel founded on Olga Nethersole's play by EDWARD MARSHALL. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrations by Clarence Rowe. $1. 50. DEVOTA By AUGUSTA EVANS WILSON Illustrated. (Third large printing. ) $1. 50. THE LION AND THE MOUSE By CHARLES KLEIN and ARTHUR HORNBLOW. Illustrated. (180th thousand. )$1. 50. THE FORTUNATE PRISONER A novel by MAX PEMBERTON. 12mo, Cloth. With four colored illustrations. $1. 50. THE CALL OF THE HEART A novel by L. N. WAY. 12mo, Cloth. With beautiful frontispieceillustration in four colors. $1. 50. EVERYBODY'S SECRET A novel by DION CLAYTON CALTHROP. 12mo, Cloth. $1. 50. THE DISAPPEARING EYE A detective story by FERGUS HUME. 12mo, Cloth. $1. 25. RIDGWAY OF MONTANA By WM. MACLEOD RAINE, author of "Wyoming. " 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. A QUARTER TO FOUR A Thrilling Story of Adventure. By WILLIAM WALLACE COOK. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 50. THE HAPPY FAMILY By B. M. BOWER, author of "Chip of the Flying U, " etc. 12mo, Cloth. Illustrated. $1. 25. THE LONG SHADOW By B. M. BOWER. 12mo, Cloth. Colored illustrations. $1. 25. THE LONESOME TRAIL By B. M. BOWER. 12mo, Cloth. Colored illustrations. $1. 25. THE LURE OF THE DIM TRAILS By B. M. BOWER. Illustrations in four colors. $1. 50. HER PRAIRIE KNIGHT By B. M. BOWER. Illustrations in four colors. $1. 25. THE RANGE DWELLERS By B. M. BOWER. Illustrations in four colors. $1. 25. CHIP OF THE FLYING U By B. M. BOWER. Three illustrations. Popular edition, 50 cts. THE MAKING OF A SUCCESSFUL WIFE By CASPER S. YOST. $1. 00. THE MAKING OF A SUCCESSFUL HUSBAND By CASPER S. YOST. $1. 00.