ABSALOM'S HAIR

BJORNSTJERNE BJORNSON

CHAPTER 1

Harald Kaas was sixty. 

He had given up his free, uncriticised bachelor life; his yachtwas no longer seen off the coast in summer; his tours to Englandand the south had ceased; nay, he was rarely to be found even athis club in Christiania. His gigantic figure was never seen in thedoorways; he was failing. 

Bandy-legged he had always been, but this defect had increased;his herculean back was rounded, and he stooped a little. Hisforehead, always of the broadest--no one else's hat would fit him--was now one of the highest, that is to say, he had lost all hishair, except a ragged lock over each ear and a thin fringe behind. He was beginning also to lose his teeth, which were strong thoughsmall, and blackened by tobacco; and now, instead of "deuce takeit" he said "deush take it. "

He had always held his hands half closed as though graspingsomething; now they had stiffened so that he could never open themfully. The little finger of his left hand had been bitten off "ingratitude" by an adversary whom he had knocked down: according toHarald's version of the story, he had compelled the fellow toswallow the piece on the spot. 

He was fond of caressing the stump, and it often served as anintroduction to the history of his exploits, which became greaterand greater as he grew older and quieter. 

His small sharp eyes were deep set and looked at one with greatintensity. There was power in his individuality, and, besidesshrewd sense, he possessed a considerable gift for mechanics. Hisboundless self-esteem was not devoid of greatness, and theemphasis with which both body and soul proclaimed themselves madehim one of the originals of the country. 

Why was he nothing more?

He lived on his estate, Hellebergene, whose large woods skirtedthe coast, while numerous leasehold farms lay along the course ofthe river. At one time this estate had belonged to the Kurtfamily, and had now come back to them, in so far as that Harald'sfather, as every one knew, was not a Kaas at all, but a Kurt; itwas he who had got the estate together again; a book might bewritten about the ways and means that he had employed. 

The house looked out over a bay studded with islands; farther outwere more islands and the open sea. An immensely long building, raised on an old and massive foundation, its eastern wing barelyhalf furnished, the western inhabited by Harald Kaas, who livedhis curious life here. 

These wings were connected by two covered galleries, one above theother, with stairs at each end. 

Curiously enough, these galleries did not face the sea, that is, the south, but the fields and woods to the north. The portion ofthe house between the two wings was a neutral territory--namely, alarge dining-room with a ballroom above it, neither of which wasused in later years. 

Harald Kaas's suite of rooms was distinguished from without by amighty elk's head with its enormous antlers, which was set up overthe gallery. 

In the gallery itself were heads of bear, wolf, fox and lynx, withstuffed birds from land and sea. Skins and guns hung on the wallsof the anteroom, the inner rooms were also full of skins andimpregnated with the smell of wild animals and tobacco-smoke. Harald himself called it "Man-smell;" no one who had once put hisnose inside could ever forget it. 

Valuable and beautiful skins hung on the walls and covered thefloors; his very bed was nothing else; Harald Kaas lay, and sat, and walked on skins, and each one of them was a welcome subject ofconversation, for he had shot and flayed every single animalhimself. To be sure, there were those who hinted that most of theskins had been bought from Brand and Company, of Bergen, and thatonly the stories were shot and flayed at home. 

I for my part think that this was an exaggeration; but be that asit may, the effect was equally thrilling when Harald Kaas, seatedin his log chair by the fireside, his feet on the bearskin, openedhis shirt to show us the scars on his hairy chest (and what scarsthey were!) which had been made by the bear's teeth, when he haddriven his knife, right up to the haft, into the monster's heart. All the queer tankards, and cupboards, and carved chairs listenedwith their wonted impassiveness. 

Harald Kaas was sixty, when, in the month of July, he sailed intothe bay accompanied by four ladies whom he had brought from thesteamer--an elderly lady and three young ones, all related to him. They were to stay with him until August. 

They occupied the upper storey. From it they could hear himwalking about and grunting below them. They began to feel a littlenervous. Indeed, three of them had had serious misgivings aboutaccepting the invitation; and these misgivings were not diminishedwhen, next morning, they saw Kaas composedly strolling up from thesea stark naked!

They screamed, and, gathering together, still in their nightgowns, held a council of war as to the advisability of leaving at once;but when one of them cried "You should not have called us, Aunt, and then we should not have seen him, " they could not helplaughing, and therewith the whole affair ended. Certainly theywere a little stiff at breakfast; but when Harold Kaas began astory about an old black mare of his which was in love with ayoung brown horse over at the Dean's, and which plunged madly ifany other horse came near her, but, on the other hand, put herhead coaxingly on one side and whinnied "like a dainty girl"whenever the parson's horse came that way--well, at that they hadto give in, as well first as last. 

If they had strayed here out of curiosity they must just put upwith the "NIGHT side of nature, " as Harald Kaas expressed it, withthe stress on the first word. 

For all that they were nearly frightened out of their wits thevery next night, when he discharged his gun right under theirwindows. The aunt even asserted that he had shot through her opencasement. She screamed loudly, and the others, starting from theirsleep, were out on the floor before they knew where they were. Then they crouched in the windows and peeped out, although theiraunt declared that they would certainly be shot--they really mustsee what it was. 

Yes! there they saw him among the cherry and apple trees, gun inhand, and they could hear him swearing. In the greatesttrepidation they crept back into bed again. Next morning theylearned that he had shot at some night prowlers, one of whom hadgot "half the charge in his leg, that he had, Deush take him! Itain't the prowling I mind, but that he should prowl here. Webachelors will have no one poaching on our preserves. "

The four ladies sat as stiff as four church candles, till atlength one of them sprang up with a scream, the others joining inchorus. 

The visitors were not bored; Harald Kaas dealt too much in theunexpected for that. There was a charm, too, in the great woods, where there had been no felling since he had come into theproperty, and there were merry walks by the riverside and plentyof fish in the river. 

They bathed, they took delightful sails in the cutter and drivesabout the neighbourhood, though certainly the turn-out was none ofthe smartest. 

The youngest of the girls, Kristen Ravn, presently became lesseager to join in these expeditions. She had fallen in love withthe disused east wing of the house, and there she spent many along hour, alone by the open window, gazing out at the great lime-trees which stood straggling, gaunt, and mysterious. 

"You ought to build a balcony here, out towards the sea, " shesaid. "Look how the water glitters between the limes. "

When once she had hit upon a plan, Kristen Ravn never relinquishedit, and when she bad suggested it some four or five times, hepromised that it should be done. But on the heels of this schemecame another. 

"Below the first balcony there must be another wider one, " saidshe in her soft voice, "and it must have steps at each end down tothe lawn--the lawn is so lovely just here. "

The unheard-of presumption of her demand inoculated him with theidea, and at length he consented to this as well. 

"The rooms must be refurnished, " she gravely commanded. "The onenext to the balcony which is to be built under here shall be inyellow pine, and the floor must be polished. " She pointed with herlong delicate hand. "ALL the floors must be polished. I will giveyou the design for the room above, I have thought it carefullyout. " And in imagination she papered the walls, arranged thefurniture, and hung up curtains of wondrous patterns. 

"I know, too, how the other rooms are to be done, " she added. Andshe went from one to the other, remaining a little while in each. He followed, like an old horse led by the bridle. 

Before their visit was half over he most coolly neglected threeout of his four guests. 

His deep-set eyes twinkled with the liveliest admiration whenevershe approached. He sought in the faces of the others theadmiration which he himself felt: he would amble round her like anold photographic camera which had the power of setting itself up. 

But from the day when she took down from his bookshelf a Frenchwork on mechanics, a subject with which she was evidentlyacquainted and for which she declared that she had a naturalaptitude, it was all over with him. From that day forward, if shewere present, he effaced himself both in word and action. 

In the mornings when he met her in one of her characteristiccostumes he laughed softly, or gazed and gazed at her, and thenglanced towards the others. She did not talk much, but every wordthat she uttered aroused his admiration. But he was most of allcaptivated when she sat quietly apart, heedless of every one: atsuch times he resembled an old parrot expectant of sugar. 

His linen had always been snowy white, but beyond this he hadtaken no special pains with his toilet; but now he strutted aboutin a Tussore silk coat, which he had bought in Algiers, but had atonce put aside because it was too tight--he looked like a cliptbox hedge in it. 

Now, who was this lion-tamer of twenty-one, who, without in theleast wishing to do so, unconsciously even (she was the quietestof the party), had made the monarch of the forest crouch at herfeet and gaze at her in abject humility?

Look at her, as she sits there, with her loose shining hair of theprettiest shade of dark red; look at her broad forehead andprominent nose, but more than all at those large wondering eyes;look at her throat and neck, her tall slight figure; noticeespecially the Renaissance dress which she wears, its style andcolour, and your curiosity will still remain unsatisfied, for shehas an individuality all her own. 

Kristen Ravn had lost her mother at her birth and her father whenshe was five years old. The latter left her a handsome fortune, with the express condition that the investments should not bechanged, and that the income should be for her own use whether shemarried or not. He hoped by this means to form her character. Shewas brought up by three different members of her wide-branchingfamily, a family which might more properly be termed a clan, although they had no common characteristics beyond a desire to gotheir own way. 

When two Ravns meet they, as a rule, differ on every subject; butas a race they hold religiously together--indeed, in their eyesthere is no other family which is "amusing, " the favouriteadjective of the Ravns. 

Kristen had a receptive nature; she read everything, andremembered what she read; that is say, she had a logical mind, fora retentive memory implies an orderly brain. She was consequentlyNUMBER ONE in everything which she took up. This, coupled with thefact that she lived among those who regarded her somewhat as aspeculation, and consequently flattered her, had early made animpression on her nature, quite as great, indeed, as thepossession of money. 

She was by no means proud, it was not in the Ravn nature to be so;but at ten years old she had left off playing; she preferred towander in the woods and compose ballads. At twelve she insisted onwearing silk dresses, and, in the teeth of an aunt all curls andlace and with a terrible flow of words, she carried her point. Sheheld herself erect and prim in her silks, and still remainedNUMBER ONE. She composed verses about Sir Adge and Maid Else, about birds and flowers and sad things. 

On reaching the age at which other girls, who have the means, begin to wear silk dresses, she left them off. She was tired, shesaid, of the "smooth and glossy. "

She now grew enthusiastic for fine wool and expensive velvet ofevery shade. Dresses in the Renaissance style became herfavourites, and the subject of her studies. She puffed out herbodices like those in Leonardo's and Rafael's portraits of women, and tried in other ways as well to resemble them. 

She left off writing verses, and wrote stories instead; the stylewas good, though they were anything rather than spontaneous. 

They were short, with a more or less clear pointe. Stories by agirl of eighteen do not as a general rule make a sensation, butthese were particularly audacious. It was evident that their onlyobject was to scandalise. Instead of her own name she used thenom-de-plume of "Puss. " This, however, was only to postpone theannouncement that the author who scandalised her readers most, andthat at a time when every author strove to do so, was a girl ofeighteen belonging to one of the first families in the country. 

Soon every one knew that "Puss" was she of the tumbled red locks, "the tall Renaissance figure with the Titian hair. "

Her hair was abundant, glossy, and slightly curling; she stillwore it hanging loose over her neck and shoulders, as she had doneas a child. Her great eyes seemed to look out upon a new world;but one felt that the lower part of her face was scarcely inharmony with the upper. The cheeks fell in a little; the prominentnose made the mouth look smaller than it actually was; her neckseemed only to lead the eye downward to her bosom, which almostappeared to caress her throat, especially when her head was bentforward, as was generally the case. And very beautiful the throatwas, delicate in colour, superb in contour, and admirably set uponthe bust. For this reason she could never find in her heart tohide this full white neck, but always kept it uncovered. Herfinely moulded bust surmounting a slender waist and small hips, her rounded arms, her long hands, her graceful carriage, in hertightly-fitting dress, formed such a striking picture that one didmore than look--one was obliged to study her, When the eleganceand beauty of her dress were taken into account, one realised howmuch intelligence and artistic taste had here been exercised. 

She was friendly in society, natural and composed, always occupiedwith something, always with that wondering expression. She spokevery little, but her words were always well chosen. 

All this, and her general disposition, made people chary ofopposing her, more especially those who knew how intelligent shewas and how much knowledge she possessed. 

She had no friends of her own, but her innumerable relationssupplied her with society, gossip, and flattery, and were at onceher friends and body-guard. She would have had to go abroad to bealone. 

Among these relations she was a princess: they not only paid herhomage, but had sworn by "Life and Death" that she must marrywithout more ado, which was absolutely against her wish. 

From her childhood she had been laying by money, but the amount ofher savings was far less than her relations supposed. This rathermythical fortune contributed not a little to the fact that "everyone" was in love with her. Not only the bachelors of the family, that was a matter of course, but artists and amateurs, even themost blase, swarmed round her, la jeunesse doree (which is homelyenough in Norway), without an exception. A living work of art, worth more or less money, piquante and admired, how each longed tocarry her home, to gloat over her, to call her his own!

There was surely more intensity of feeling near her than nearothers, a losing of oneself in one only; that unattainable dreamof the world-weary. 

With her one could lead a thoroughly stylish life, full of art andtaste and comfort. She was highly cultivated, and absolutelyemancipated--our little country did not, in those days, possess amore alluring expression. 

When face to face with her they were uncertain how to act, whetherto approach her diffidently or boldly, smile or look serious, talkor be silent. 

What these idle wooers gleaned from her stories, hercharacteristic dress, her wondering eyes, and her quietdreaminess, was not the highest, but they expended their energythereon; so that their unbounded discomfiture may be imaginedwhen, in the autumn, the news spread that Fruken Kristen Ravn wasmarried to Harald Kaas. 

They burst into peals of derisive laughter they scoffed, theyexclaimed; the only explanation they could offer was that they hadtoo long hesitated to try their fortune. 

There were others, who both knew and admired her, who were no lessdismayed. They were more than disappointed--the word is too weak;to many of them it seemed simply deplorable. How on earth could ithave happened? Every one, herself excepted, knew that it wouldruin her life. 

On Kristen Ravn's independent position, her strong character, herrare courage, on her knowledge, gifts, and energy, many, especially women, had built up a future for the cause of Woman. Had she not already written fearlessly for it? Her tendencytowards eccentricity and paradox would soon have worn off, theythought, as the struggle carried her forward, and at last shemight have become one of the first champions of the cause. Allthat was noblest and best in Kristen must predominate in the end. 

And now the few who seek to explain life's perplexities ratherthan to condemn them discovered--Some of them, that the defianttone of her writings and her love of opposition bespoke a degreeof vanity sufficient to have led her into fallacy. Othersmaintained that hers was essentially a romantic nature which mightcause her to form a false estimate both of her own powers and ofthe circumstances of life. Others, again, had heard something ofhow this husband and wife lived, one in each wing of the house, with different staffs of servants, and with separate incomes; thatshe had furnished her side in her own way, at her own expense, andhad apparently conceived the idea of a new kind of married life. Some people declared that the great lime-trees near the mansion atHellebergene were alone responsible for the marriage. They soughedso wondrously in the summer evenings, and the sea beneath theirbranches told such enthralling stories. Those grand old woods, thelike of which were hardly to be found in impoverished Norway, werefar dearer to her than was her husband. Her imagination had beentaken captive by the trees, and thus Harald Kaas had taken HER. The estate, the climate, the exclusive possession of her part ofthe house: this was the bait which she had chosen. Harald Kaas wasonly a kind of Puck who had to be taken along with it. But it isdoubtful whether this conjecture was any nearer the truth. No oneever really knew. She was not one of those whom it is easy tocatechise. 

Every one wearies at last of trying to solve even the mostinteresting of enigmas. No one could tolerate the sound of hername when, four months after her marriage, she was seen in a stallat the Christiania Theatre just as in old days, though lookingperhaps a little paler. Every opera-glass was levelled at her. Shewore a light, almost white, dress, cut square as usual. She didnot hide her face behind her fan. She looked about her with herwondering eyes, as though she was quite unconscious that therewere other people in the theatre or that any one could be lookingat her. Even the most pertinacious were forced to concede that shewas both physically and mentally unique, with a charm all her own. 

But just as she had become once more the subject of generalconversation, she disappeared. It afterwards transpired that herhusband had fetched her away, though hardly any one had seen him. It was concluded that they must have had their first quarrel overit. 

Accurate information about their joint life was never obtained. The attempts of her relations to force themselves upon them werequite without result, except that they found out that she wasenceinte, notwithstanding her utmost efforts to conceal the fact. 

She sent neither letter nor announcement; but in the summer, whenshe was next seen in Christiania, she was wheeling a perambulatoralong Karl Johan Street, her eyes as wondering as though some onehad just put it between her hands. She looked handsomer and moreblooming than ever. 

In the perambulator lay a boy with his mother's broad forehead, his mother's red hair. The child was charmingly dressed, and he, as well as the perambulator, was so daintily equipped, socompletely in harmony with herself, that every one understood thereply that she gave, when, after the usual congratulations, heracquaintances inquired, "Shall we soon have a new story fromyou?"--she answered, "A new story? Here it is!"

But, notwithstanding the unalloyed happiness which she displayedhere, it could no longer be concealed that more often than not shewas absent from home, and that she never mentioned her husband'sname. If any one spoke of him to her, she changed the subject. Bythe time that the boy was a year old, it had become evident thatshe contemplated leaving Hellebergene entirely. She had been inChristiania for some time and had gone home to make arrangements, saying that she should come back in a few days. 

But she never did so. 

The day after her return home, while the numerous servants atHellebergene, as well as the labourers with their wives andchildren, were all assembled at the potato digging, Harald Kaasappeared, carrying his wife under his left arm like a sack. Heheld her round the waist, feet first, her face downwards andhidden by her hair, her hands convulsively clutching his leftthigh, her legs sometimes hanging down, sometimes straight out. Hewalked composedly out with her, holding in his right hand a bunchof long fresh birch twigs. A little way from the gallery hepaused, and laying her across his left knee, he tore off some ofher clothes, and beat her until the blood flowed. She neveruttered a sound. When he put her from him, she tremblinglyrearranged--first her hair, thus displaying her face just as theblood flowed back from it, leaving it deadly white. Tears of painand shame rolled down her cheeks; but still not a sound. She triedto rearrange her dress, but her tattered garments trailed behindher as she went back to the house. She shut the door after her, but had to open it again; her torn clothes had caught fast in it. 

The women stood aghast; some of the children screamed with fright:this infected the rest, and there was a chorus of sobs. The men, most of whom had been sitting smoking their pipes, but who hadsprung to their feet again, stood filled with shame andindignation. 

It had not been without a pang that Harald Kaas had done this, hisface and manner had shown it for a long time and still did so; buthe had expected that a roar of laughter would greet hisextraordinary vagary. This was evident from the composure withwhich he had carried his wife out; and still more from the glanceof gratified revenge with which he looked round him afterwards. But there was only dead stillness, succeeded by weeping, sobbing, and indignation. He stood there for a moment, quite overcome, thenwent indoors again, a defeated, utterly broken man. 

In every encounter with this delicate creature the giant had beenworsted. 

After this, however, she never went beyond the grounds. For thefirst few years she was only seen by the people about the estate, and by them but seldom. Sometimes she would take her boy out inhis little carriage, or, as time went on, would lead him by thehand, sometimes she was alone. She was generally wrapped in a bigshawl, a different one for each dress she wore, and which shealways held tightly round her. This was so characteristic of herthat to this day I hear people from the neighbourhood talk aboutit as though she were never seen otherwise. 

What then did she do? She studied; she had given up writing: formore than one reason it had become distasteful to her. She hadchanged roles with her husband, giving herself up to mathematics, chemistry, and physics, she made calculations and analyses--sending for books and materials for these objects. The people onthe estate saw nothing extraordinary in all this. From the firstthey had admired her delicacy and beauty. Every one admired her;it was only the manner and degree that varied. 

Little by little she came to be regarded as one whose life andthoughts were beyond their comprehension. 

She sought no one, but to those who came to her she never refusedhelp--more or less. She made herself well acquainted with thefacts of each case; no one could ever deceive her. Whether shegave much or little, she imposed no conditions, she never lecturedthem. Her opinion was expressed by the amount that she gave. 

Her husband's behaviour towards her was such that, had she notbeen very popular, she could not have remained at Hellebergene;that is to say, he opposed and thwarted her in every way he could;but every one took her part. 

The boy! Could not he have been a bond of union? On the contrary, there were those who declared that it was from the time of hisbirth that things had gone amiss between the parents. The firsttime that his father saw him the nurse reported that he "came inlike a lord and went out like a beggar!" The mother lay down againand laughed; the nurse had never seen the like of it before. Hadhe expected that his child must of necessity resemble him, only tofind it the image of its mother?

When the boy was old enough he loved to wander across to hisfather's rooms where there were so many curious things to see; hisfather always received him kindly, talking in a way suited to hischildish intelligence, but he would take occasion to cut away aquantity of his hair. His mother let it grow free and long likeher own, and his father perpetually cut it. The boy would havebeen glad enough to be rid of it, but when he grew a little older, he comprehended his father's motive, and thenceforth he was on hisguard. 

When the people on the estate had told him something of hisfather's highly-coloured histories of his feats of strength andhis achievements by land and water, the boy began to feel a shyadmiration for him, but at the same time he felt all the morestrongly the intolerable yoke which he laid upon them--upon everyliving being on the estate. It became a secret religion with himto oppose his father and help his mother, for it was she whosuffered. He would resemble her even to his hair, he would protecther, he would make it all up to her. It was a positive delight tohim when his father made him suffer: he absolutely felt proud whenhe called him Rafaella, instead of Rafael, the name which hismother had chosen for him; it was the one that she loved best. 

No one was allowed to use the boats or the carriage, no one mightwalk through the woods, which had been fenced in, the horses werenever taken out. No repairs were undertaken; if Fru Kaas attemptedto have anything done at her own expense, the workmen were orderedoff: there could no longer be any doubt about it, he wishedeverything to go to rack and ruin. The property went from bad toworse, and the woods--well! It was no secret, every one on theplace talked about it--the timber was being utterly ruined. Thebest and largest trees were already rotten; by degrees the restwould become so. 

At twelve years of age Rafael began to receive religious teachingfrom the Dean: the only subject in which his mother did notinstruct him. He shared these lessons with Helene, the Dean's onlychild, who was four years younger than Rafael and of whom he wasdevotedly fond. 

The Dean told them the story of David. The narrative was unfoldedwith additions and explanations; the boy made a picture of it tohimself; his mother had taught him everything in this way. 

Assyrian warriors with pointed beards, oblique eyes, and oblongshields, had to represent the Israelites; they marched by in anendless procession. He saw the blue-green of the vineyards on thehillside, the shadow of the dusty palm-trees upon the dusty road. Then a wood of aromatic trees into which all the warriors fled. 

Then followed the story of Absalom. 

"Absalom rebelled against his father, what a dreadful thing tothink of, " said the Dean. "A grown-up man to rebel against hisfather. " He chanced to look towards Rafael, who turned as red asfire. 

The thought which was constantly in his mind was that when he wasgrown up he should rebel against his father. 

"But Absalom was punished in a marvellous manner, " continued theDean. "He lost the battle, and as he fled through the woods, hislong hair caught in a tree, the horse ran away from under him, andhe was left hanging there until he was run through by a spear. "

Rafael could see Absalom hanging there, not in the long Assyriangarments, not with a pointed beard. No! Slender and young, inRafael's tight-fitting breeches and stockings, and with his ownred hair! Ah! how distinctly he saw it! The horse galloping faraway--the grey one at home which he used to ride by stealth whenhis father was asleep after dinner. He could see the tall, slenderlad, dangling and swaying, with a spear through his body. Distinctly! Distinctly!

This vision, which he never mentioned to a soul, he could not getrid of. To be left hanging there by his hair--what a strangepunishment for rebelling against his father!

Certainly he already knew the history, but till now he had paid nospecial heed to it. 

It was on a Friday that this great impression had been made onhim, and on the following Thursday morning he awoke to see hismother standing over him with her most wondering expression. Herhair still as she had plaited it for the night; one plait hadtouched him on the nose and awoke him before she spoke. She stoodbending over him, in her long white nightgown with its dainty lacetrimming, and with bare feet. She would never have come in likethat if something terrible had not happened. Why did she notspeak? only look and look--or was she really frightened?

"Mother!" he cried, sitting up. 

Then she bent close down to him. "THE MAN IS DEAD, " she whispered. It was his father whom she called "the man, " she never spoke ofhim otherwise. 

Rafael did not comprehend what she said, or perhaps it paralysedhim. She repeated it again louder and louder, "The man is dead, the man is dead. "

Then she stood upright, and putting out her bare feet from underher nightgown, she began to dance--only a few steps; and then sheslipped away through the door which stood half open. He jumped upand ran after her; there she lay on the sofa, sobbing. She feltthat he was behind her, she raised herself quickly, and, stillsobbing, pressed him to her heart. 

Even when they stood together beside the body, the hand which hehad in his shook so that he threw his arms round her, thinkingthat she would fall. 

Later in life, when he recalled this, he understood what she hadsilently endured, what an unbending will she had brought to thestruggle, but also what it had cost her. 

At the time he did not in the least comprehend it. He imaginedthat she suffered from the horror of the moment as he himself did. 

There lay the giant, in wretchedness and squalor! He who had onceboasted of his cleanliness, and expected the like in others, laythere, dirty and unshaven, under dirty bed clothes, in linen soragged and filthy that no workman on the estate had worse. Theclothes which he had worn the day before lay on a chair beside thebed, miserably threadbare, foul with dirt, sweat, and tobacco, andstinking like everything else. His mouth was distorted, his handstightly clenched; he had died of a stroke. 

And how forlorn and desolate was all around him! Why had his sonnever noticed this before? Why had he never felt that his fatherwas lonely and forsaken? To how great an extent no words couldexpress. 

Rafael burst into tears; louder and louder grew his sobbing, untilit sounded through all the rooms. The people from the estate camein one by one. They wished to satisfy their curiosity. 

The boy's crying, unconsciously to himself, influenced them all:they saw everything in a new light. How unfortunate, how desolate, how helpless had he been who now lay there. Lord, have mercy on usall!

When the corpse of Harald Kaas had been laid out, the face shaved, and the eyes closed, the distortion was less apparent. They couldtrace signs of suffering, but the expression was still virile. Itseemed a handsome face to them now

CHAPTER 2

Within a few days of the funeral mother and son were in England. 

Rafael was now to enter upon a long course of study, for which, byhis earlier education, his mother had prepared him, and for which, by painful privations, she had saved up sufficient money. 

The property was to the last degree impoverished, and burdenedwith mortgages, and the timber only fit for fuel. 

Their neighbour the Dean, a clear-headed and practical man, tookupon himself the management of affairs; as money was needed thework of devastation must begin at once. The mother and son did notwish to witness it. 

They came to England like two fugitives who, after many and greattrials, for affection's sake seek a new home and a new country. 

Rafael was then twelve years old. 

They were inseparable, and in the shiftless life that they led intheir new surroundings they became, if possible, more closelyattached to each other. 

Yet not long afterwards they had their first disagreement. 

He had gone to school, had begun to learn the language and to makefriends, and had developed a great desire to show off. 

He was very tall and slender and was anxious to be athletic. Hetook an active part in the play-ground, but here he achieved nogreat success. On the other hand, thanks to his mother, he wasbetter informed than his comrades, and he contrived to obtainprominence by this. This prominence must be maintained, andnothing answered so well as boasting about Norway and his father'sexploits. His statements were somewhat exaggerated, but that wasnot altogether his fault, He knew English fairly well, but had notmastered its niceties. He made use of superlatives, which alwayscome the most readily. It was true that he had inherited from hisfather twenty guns, a large sailing-boat, and several smallerones; but how magnificent these boats and guns had become!

He intended to go to the North Pole, he said, as his father haddone, to shoot white bears, and invited them all to come with him. 

He made a greater impression on his hearers than he himself wasaware of; but something more was wanted, for it was impossible toforetell from day to day what might be expected of him. He had tostudy hard in order to meet the demand. 

As an outcome of this, he betook himself one evening to thehairdresser's, with some of his schoolfellows, and, without moreado, requested him to cut his hair quite close. That ought tosatisfy them for a long time. 

The other boys had teased him about his hair, and it got in theway when he was playing--he hated it. Besides, ever since thestory of Absalom's rebellion and punishment, it had remained asecret terror to him, but it had never before occurred to him tohave it cut off. 

His schoolfellows were dismayed, and the hairdresser looked on itas a work of wilful destruction. 

Rafael felt his heart begin to sink, but the very audacity of thething gave him courage They should see what he dare do. Thehairdresser hesitated to act without Fru Kaas's knowledge, but atlength he ceased to make objections. 

Rafael's heart sank lower and lower, but he must go through withit now. "Off with it, " he said, and remained immovable in thechair. 

"I have never seen more splendid hair, " said the hairdresserdiffidently, taking up the scissors but still hesitating. 

Rafael saw that his companions were on the tiptoe of expectation. "Off with it, " he said again with assumed indifference. 

The hairdresser cut the hair into his hand and laid it carefullyin paper. 

The boys followed every snip of the scissors with their eyes, Rafael with his ears; he could not see in the glass. 

When the hairdresser had finished and had brushed his clothes forhim, he offered him the hair. "What do I want with it?" saidRafael. He dusted his elbows and knees a little, paid, and leftthe shop, followed by his companions. They, however, exhibited noparticular admiration. He caught a glimpse of himself in the glassas he went out, and thought that he looked frightful. 

He would have given all that he possessed (which was not much), hewould have endured any imaginable suffering, he thought, to havehis hair back again. 

His mother's wondering eyes rose up before him with every shade ofexpression; his misery pursued him, his vanity mocked him. The endof it all was that he stole up to his room and went to bed withouthis supper. 

But when his mother had vainly waited for him, and some onesuggested that he might be in the house, she went to his room. 

He heard her on the stairs; he felt that she was at the door. Whenshe entered he had hidden his head beneath the bedclothes. Shedragged them back; and at the first sight of her dismay he wasreduced to such despair that the tears which were beginning toflow ceased at once. 

White and horror-struck she stood there; indeed she thought atfirst that some one had done it maliciously; but when she couldnot extract a word of enlightenment, she suspected mischief. 

He felt that she was waiting for an explanation, an excuse, aprayer for forgiveness, but he could not, for the life of him, getout a word. 

What, indeed, could he say? He did not understand it himself. Butnow he began to cry violently. He huddled himself together, clasping his head between his hands. It felt like a bristlystubble. 

When he looked up again his mother was gone. 

A child sleeps in spite of everything. He came down the nextmorning in a contrite mood and thoroughly shamefaced. His motherwas not up; she was unwell, for she had not slept a wink. He heardthis before he went to her. He opened her door timidly. There shelay, the picture of wretchedness. 

On the toilet-table, in a white silk handkerchief, was his hair, smoothed and combed. 

She lay there in her lace-trimmed nightgown, great tears rollingdown her cheeks. He had come, intending to throw himself into herarms and beg her pardon a thousand times. But he had a strongfeeling that he had better not do so, or was he afraid to? She wasin the clouds, far, far away. She seemed in a trance: something, at once painful and sacred, held her enchained. She was bothpathetic and sublime, The boy stepped quietly from the room and hurried off to school. 

She remained in bed that day and the next, and made him sit withthe servant in order that she might be alone. When she was introuble she always behaved thus, and that he should cross her inthis way was the greatest trial that she had ever known. It cameupon her, too, like a deluge of rain from a clear sky. NOW itseemed to her that she could foresee his future--and her own. 

She laid the blame of all this on his paternal ancestry. She couldnot see that incessant artistic fuss and too much intellectualtraining had, perhaps, aroused in him a desire for independence. 

The first time that she saw him again with his cropped head, whichgrew more and more like his father's in shape, her tears flowedquietly. 

When he wished to come to her side, she waived him back with hershapely hand, nor would she talk to him; when he talked she hardlylooked at him; till at last he burst into tears. For he sufferedas one can suffer but once, when the childish penitence is freshand therefore boundless, and when the yearning for love hasreceived its first rebuff. 

But when, on the fifth day, she met him coming up the stairs, shestood still in dismay at his appearance: pale, thin, timid; theeffect perhaps heightened by the loss of his hair. He, too, stoodstill, looking forlorn and abject, with disconsolate eyes. Thenhers filled; she stretched out her arms. He was once more in hisParadise, but they both cried as though they must wade through anocean of tears before they could talk to each other again. 

"Tell me about it now, " she whispered. This was in her own room. They had spoken the first fond words and kissed each other overand over again. "How could this have happened, Rafael?" shewhispered again, with her head pressed to his; she did not wish tolook at him while she spoke. 

"Mother, " he answered, "it is worse to cut down the woods at home, at Hellebergene, than that I--"

She raised her head and looked at him. She had taken off her hatand gloves, but now she put them quickly on again. 

"Rafael, dear, " she said, "shall we go for a walk together in thepark, under the grand old trees?"

She had felt his retort to be ingenious. 

After this episode, however, England, and more especially herson's schoolfellows, became distasteful to her, and she constantlymade plans to keep him away from the latter out of school hours. 

She found this very easy; sometimes she went over his studies withhim, at others they visited all the Manufactories and "Works" formiles round. 

She liked to see for herself and awakened the same taste in him. 

Factories which, as a rule, were closed to visitors, were readilyopened to the pretty elegant lady and her handsome boy, "who afterall knew nothing at all about it;" and they were able to seealmost all that they wished. It was a less congenial task to useher influence to turn his thoughts to higher things, but it wasrarely, nevertheless, that she failed. She struggled hard overwhat she did not understand and sought for help. To explain thesethings to Rafael in the most attractive manner possible became anew occupation for her. 

His natural disposition inclined him to such studies; but to a boyof thirteen, who was thus kept from his comrades and their sports, it soon became a nuisance. 

No sooner had Fru Kaas noticed this than she took active steps. They left England and crossed to France. 

The strange speech threw him back on her; no one shared him withher. They settled in Calais. A few days after their arrival shecut her hair short; she hoped that it would touch him to see thatas he would not look like her, she tried to look like him--to bea. Boy like him. She bought a smart new hat, she composed a jauntycostume, new from top to toe, for EVERYTHING must be altered withthe hair. But when she stood before him, looking like a girl oftwenty-five, merry, almost boisterous, he was simply dismayed--nay, it was some time before he could altogether comprehend whathad happened. As long as he could remember his mother, her eyeshad always looked forth from beneath a crown; more solemn, morebeautiful. 

"Mother, " he said, "where are you?"

She grew pale and grave, and stammered something about its beingmore comfortable--about red hair not looking well when it began tolose its colour--and went into her room. There she sat with hishair before her and her own beside it; she wept. 

"Mother, where are you?" She might have answered, "Rafael, whereare you?"

She went about with him everywhere. In France two handsome, stylishly dressed people are always certain to be noticed, a thingwhich she thoroughly appreciated. 

During their different expeditions she always spoke French; hebegged her to talk Norse at least now and then, but all in vain. 

Here, too, they visited every possible and impossible factory. Unpractical and reserved as she was on ordinary occasions, shecould be full of artifice and coquetry whenever she wished to gainaccess to a steam bakery and particular as she generally was abouther toilette, she would come away again sooty and grimy if therebyshe could procure for Rafael some insight into mechanics. Sheshrank from foul air as from the cholera, yet inhaled sulphuricacid gas as though it had been ozone for his sake. 

"Seeing for yourself, Rafael, is the substance, other methods areits shadow;" or "Seeing for yourself, Rafael, is meat and drink, the other is but literature. "

He was not quite of the same opinion: he thought that Notre Damede Paris, from which he was daily dragged away, was the richestbanquet that he had yet enjoyed, while from the factory of Mayelet fils there issued the most deadly odours. 

His reading--she had encouraged him in it for the sake of thelanguage and had herself helped him; now she was jealous of it andcould not be persuaded to get him new books; but he got themnevertheless. 

They had been in Calais for several months; he had masters and wasbeginning to feel himself at home, when there arrived at thepension a widow from one of the colonies, accompanied by herdaughter, a girl of thirteen. 

The new comers had not appeared at meals for more than two daysbefore the young gentleman began to pay his court to the younglady. From the first moment it was a plain case. Very soon everyone in the pension was highly amused to notice how fluent hisFrench was becoming; his choice of words at times was evenelegant! The girl taught him it without a trace of grammar, bycharm, sprightliness, a little nonsense; a pair of confiding eyesand a youthful voice were sufficient. It was from her that he got, by stealth, one novel after another. By stealth it had to be; bystealth Lucie had procured them; by stealth she gave them to him;by stealth they were read; by stealth she took them back again. This reading made him a little absent-minded, but otherwisenothing betrayed his flights into literature: to be sure, theywere not very wonderful. 

Fru Kaas noticed her son's flirtation, and smiled with the restover his progress in French. She had less objection to thisfriendship, in which, to a great extent, she shared, than to thosein England, from which she had been quite excluded. In theevenings she would take the mother and daughter out for shortexcursions; and these she greatly enjoyed. But the novel readingwhich the young people carried on secretly had resulted inconversations of a "grown up" type. They talked of love with thedeep experience which is proper to their age, they talked withstill greater discretion as to when their wedding should takeplace; on this point they indirectly said much which caused themmany a delightful tremor. As they were accustomed to talk aboutthemselves before others, to describe their feelings in a veiledform, it often happened when there were many people near that theycarried this amusement further, and before they were themselvesaware of it, they were in the full tide of a symbolic language andplayed "catch" with each other. 

Fru Kaas noticed one evening that the word "rose" was drawn out toa greater length than it was possible for any rose to attain to;at the same time she saw the languishing look in their eyes, andbroke in with the question, "What do you mean about the rose, child?"

If any one had peeped behind a rose-bush and caught them kissingone another, a thing they had never done, they could not haveblushed more. 

The next day Fru Kaas found new rooms, a long way from the quaynear which they were living. 

Rafael had suffered greatly at being torn away from England justas he had come down from his high horse and had put himself on apar with his companions, but not the least notice was taken of histrouble; it had only annoyed his mother. 

To be absolutely debarred from the books he was so fond of hadbeen hard; but up to this time, being in a foreign land, amidforeign speech, he had always fallen back upon her. Now he openlydefied her. He went straight off to the hotel and sought outMadame Mery and her daughter as though nothing had occurred. Thishe did every day when he had finished his lessons. Lucie had nowbecome his sole romance; he gave all his leisure time to her, andnot only that (for it no longer sufficed to see her at hermother's), they met on the quay! At times a maid-servant walkedwith them for appearance sake, at others she kept in thebackground. Sometimes they would go on board a Norwegian ship, sometimes they wandered about or strolled beneath some greattrees. When he saw her in her short frock come out of the door, saw her quick movements, and her lively signals to him withparasol or hat or flowers, the quay, the ships, the bales, thebarrels, the air, the noise, the crowd, all seemed to play andsing, "Enfant! si j'etais roi je donerais l'empire, Et mon char, et mon septre, et mon peuple a genoux, "

and he ran to meet her. 

He never dared to do more than to take both her chubby brownhands, nor to say more than "You are very sweet, you are very verygood. " And she never went further than to look at him, walk withhim, laugh with him, and say to him, "You are not like theothers. " What experiences there had been in the life of this girlof thirteen goodness alone knows. He never asked her, he was toosure of her. 

He learned French from her as one bird feeds from another's bill, or as one who looks at his image in a fountain, as be drinks fromit. 

One day, as mother and son were at breakfast, she glanced quietlyacross at him. "I heard of an excellent preparatory school ofmechanics at Rouen, " she said, "so I wrote to inquire about it, and here is the answer. I approve of it in all respects, as youwill do when you read it. I think that we shall go to Rouen; whatdo you say to it?"

He grew first red, then white; then put down his bread, his tablenapkin; got up and left the room. Later in the day she asked himwhether he would not read the letter; he left her withoutanswering. At last, just as he was going to meet Lucie on thequay, she said, and this time with determination, that they wereto leave in the course of an hour. She had already packed up; asthey stood there the man came to fetch the luggage. At that momenthe felt that he could thoroughly understand why his father hadbeaten her. 

As they sat in the carriage which took them to the station hesuffered keenly. It could not nave been worse, he thought, if hismother had stabbed him with a knife. He did not sit beside her inthe railway carriage. 

During the first days at Rouen he would not answer when she spoketo him, nor ask a single question. He had adopted her own tactics;he carried them through with a cruelty of which he was not aware. 

For a long time he had been disposed to criticise her; now thatthis criticism was extended to all that she said or did, thespirit of accusation tinctured her whole life; their joint pastseemed altered and debased. 

His father's bent form, in the log chair on the hairless skin, malodorous and dirty, rose up before him, in vivid contrast withhis mother in her well appointed, airy, perfumed rooms!

When Rafael stood by his father's body he had felt the same thing--that the old man had been badly treated. He himself had beenencouraged to neglect his father, to shun him, to evade hisorders. At that time he had laid the blame on the people on theestate; now he put it all down to his mother's account. His fatherhad certainly adored her once, and this feeling had changed intowild self-consuming hatred. What had happened? He did not know;but he could not but admit that his mother would have tried thepatience of Job. 

He pictured to himself how Lucie would come running with herflowers, search for him over the whole quay, farther and fartherevery time, standing still at last. He could not think of itwithout tears, and without a feeling of bitterness. 

But a child is a child. It was not a life-long grief. As the placewas new and historically interesting, and as lessons had now begunand his mother was always with him, this feeling wore off, but themutual restraint was still there. The critical spirit which hadfirst been roused in England never afterwards left Rafael. 

The hours of study which they passed together produced goodresults. Beginning as her pupil, he had ended by becoming herteacher. She was anxious to keep up with him, and this was anadvantage to him, on account of her almost too minute accuracy, but still more from her intelligent questions. Apart from studythey passed many pleasant hours together, but they both knew thatsomething was missing in their conversation which could never bethere again. 

At longer or shorter intervals a shy silence interrupted thisintercourse. Sometimes it was he, sometimes she, who, for somecause or other, often a most trivial one, elected not to reply, not to ask a question, not to see. When they were good friends heappreciated the best side of her character, the self-sacrificinglife which she led for him. When they were not friends it wasexactly the opposite. When they were friends, he, as a rule, didwhatever she wished. He tried to atone for the past. He was in theland of courtesy and influenced by its teaching. When he was notfriends with her he behaved as badly as possible. He early gotamong bad companions and into dissipated habits; he was the verychild of Rebellion. At times he had qualms of conscience onaccount of it. 

She guessed this, and wished him to guess that she guessed it. 

"I perceive a strange atmosphere here, fie! Some one has mixedtheir atmosphere with yours, fie!" And she sprinkled him withscent. 

He turned as red as fire and, in his shame and misery, did notknow which way to look. But if he attempted to speak she became asstiff as a poker, and, raising her small hand, "Taisez-vous desegards, sil vous plait. "

It must be said in her excuse that, notwithstanding the daringbooks which she had written, she had had no experience of reallife; she knew no form of words for such an occasion. It came atlast to this pass, that she, who had at one time wished to controlhis whole life and every thought in it, and who would not sharehim with any one, not even with a book, gradually became unwillingto have any relations with him outside his studies. 

The French language especially lends itself to formal intercourseand diplomacy. They grasped this fact from the first. It may, indeed, have contributed to form their mutual life. It was moreequitable and caused fewer collisions. At the slightestdisagreement it was at once "Monsieur mon fils" or simply"Monsieur, " or "Madame ma mere, " or "Madame. "

At one time his health seemed likely to suffer: his rapid growthand the studies, to which she kept him very closely, were too muchfor his strength. 

But just then something remarkable occurred. At the time whenRafael was nineteen he was one day in a French chemical factory, and, as it were in a flash, saw how half the power used in themachinery might be saved. The son of the owner who had brought himthere was a fellow-student. To him he confided his discovery. Theyworked it out together with feverish excitement to the most minutedetails. It was very complex, for it was the working of thefactory itself which was involved. The scheme was carefully goneinto by the owner, his son, and their assistants together, and itwas decided to try it. It was entirely successful; LESS than halfthe motive power now sufficed. 

Rafael was away at the time that it was inaugurated; he had gonedown a mine. His mother was not with him; he never took her downmines with him. As soon as ever he returned home he hurried offwith her to see the result of his work. They saw everything, andthey both blushed at the respect shown to them by the workmen. They were quite touched when, the owner being called, they heardhis expressions of boundless delight. Champagne flowed for them, accompanied by the warmest thanks. The mother received a beautifulbouquet. Excited by the wine and the congratulations, proud of hisrecognition as a genius, Rafael left the place with his mother onhis arm. It seemed to him as though he were on one side, and allthe rest of the world on the other. His mother walked happilybeside him, with her bouquet in her hand. Rafael wore a newovercoat--one after his own heart, very long and faced with silk, and of which he was excessively proud. It was a clear winter'sday; the sun shone on the silk, and on something more as well. 

"There is not a speck on the sky, mother, " he said. 

"Nor one on your coat either, " she retorted; for there had been agreat many on his old one, and each had had its history. 

He was too big now to be turned to ridicule, and too happy aswell. She heard him humming to himself: it was the Norwegiannational air. They came back to the town again as from Elysium. All the passers-by looked at them: people quickly detecthappiness. Besides Rafael was a head taller than most of them andfairer in complexion. He walked quickly along beside his elegantmother, and looked across the Boulevard as though from a sunnyheight. 

"There are days on which one feels oneself a different person, " hesaid. 

"There are days on which one receives so much, " she answered, pressing his arm. 

They went home, threw aside their wraps, and looked at oneanother. Sketches of the machinery which they had just seen layabout, as well as some rough drawings. These she collected andmade into a roll. 

"Rafael, " she said, and drew herself up, half laughing, halftrembling, "kneel; I wish to knight you. "

It did not seem unnatural to him; he did so. 

"Noblesse oblige, " she said, and let the roll of paper approachhis head; but therewith she dropped it and burst into tears. 

He spent a merry evening with his friends, and wasenthusiastically applauded. But as he lay in bed that night hefelt utterly despondent. The whole thing might, after all, havebeen a mere chance. He had seen so much, had acquired so muchinformation; it was no discovery that he had made. What was it, then? He was certainly not a genius; that must be an exaggeration. Could one imagine a genius without a victor's confidence, or hadhis peculiar life destroyed that confidence? This anxiety whichconstantly intruded itself; this bad conscience; this dreadful, vile conscience; this ineradicable dread; was it a foreboding? Didit point to the future?

It was about half a year after this that his desultory studiesbecame concentrated on electricity, and after a time this tookthem to Munich. During the course of these studies he began towrite, quite spontaneously. The students had formed a society, andRafael was expected to contribute a paper. But his contributionwas so original that they begged him to show it to the professor, and this encouraged him greatly. It was the professor, too, whohad his first article printed. A Norwegian technical periodicalaccepted a subsequent one, and this was the external influencewhich turned his thoughts once more towards Norway. Norway rosebefore him as the promised land of electricity. The motive powerof its countless waterfalls was sufficient for the whole world! Hesaw his country during the winter darkness gleaming with electriclustre. He saw her, too, the manufactory of the world, thepossessor of navies. Now he had something to go home for!

His mother did not share his love for their country, and had nodesire to live in Norway. But the money which she had saved up forhis education bad been spent long ago. Hellebergene had had itsshare. The estate did not yield an equivalent, for it wasessentially a timbered estate, and the trees on it were stillimmature. 

So it was to be home! A few years alone at Hellebergene was justwhat he wished for. But--something always occurred to preventtheir departure at the time fixed for it. First he was detained byan invention which he wished to patent. Up to the present time hehad only sketched out ideas which others had adopted; now it wasto be different. The invention was duly patented and handed overto an agent to sell; but still they did not start. What was thehindrance? Another invention with a fresh patent more likely tosell than the first, which unfortunately did not go off. Thispatent was also taken out, which again cost money, and was handedover to the agent to be sold. Could he not start now? Well, yes, he thought he could. But Fru Kaas soon realised that he was notserious, so she sought the help of a young relative, Hans Ravn, anengineer, like most of the Ravns. Rafael liked Hans, for he washimself a Ravn in temperament, a thing that he had not realisedbefore; it was quite a revelation to him. He had believed that theRavns were like his mother, but now found that she greatlydiffered from them. To Hans Ravn Fru Kaas said plainly that nowthey must start. The last day of May was the date fixed on, andthis Hans was to tell every one, for it would make Rafael bestirhimself, his mother thought, if this were known everywhere. HansRavn spread this news far and near, partly because it was hisprovince to do so, partly because he hoped it would be theoccasion of a farewell entertainment such as had never been seen. A banquet actually did take place amid general enthusiasm, whichended in the whole company forming a procession to escort theirguest to his house. Here they encountered a crowd of officers whowere proceeding home in the same manner. They nearly came toblows, but fraternised instead, and the engineers cheered theofficers and the officers the engineers. 

The next day the history of the two entertainments and thecollision between the guests went the round of the papers. 

This produced results which Fru Kaas had not foreseen. The firstwas a very pleasant one. The professor who had had Rafael's firstarticle published drove up to the door, accompanied by his family. He mounted the stairs, and asked her if she would not, in theircompany, once more visit the prettiest parts of Munich and itsvicinity. She felt flattered, and accepted the invitation. As theydrove along they talked of nothing but Rafael: partly about hisperson, for he was the darling of every lady, partly about thefuture which lay before him. The professor said that he had neverhad a more gifted pupil. Fru Kaas had brought an excellentbinocular glass with her, which she raised to her eyes from timeto time to conceal her emotion, and their hearty praise seemed toflood the landscape and buildings with sunshine. 

The little party lunched together, and drove home in theafternoon. 

When Fru Kaas re-entered her room, she was greeted by the scent offlowers. Many of their friends who had not till now known whenthey were to leave had wished to pay them some compliment. Indeed, the maid said that the bell had been ringing the whole morning. Alittle later Rafael and Hans Ravn came in with one or two friends. They proposed to dine together. The sale of the last patent seemedto be assured, and they wished to celebrate the event. Fru Kaaswas in excellent spirits, so off they went. 

They dined in the open air with a number of other people roundthem. There was music and merriment, and the subdued hum ofdistant voices rose and fell in the twilight. When the lamps werelighted, they had on one side the glare of a large town, on theother the semi-darkness was only relieved by points of light; andthis was made the subject of poetical allusions in speeches to thefriends who were so soon to leave them. 

Just then two ladies slowly passed near Rafael's chair. Fru Kaas, who was sitting opposite, noticed them, but he did not. When theyhad gone a short distance they stood still and waited, but did notattract his attention. Then they came slowly back again, passingclose behind his chair, but still in vain. This annoyed Fru Kaas. Her individuality was so strong that her silence cast a shadowover the whole party; they broke up. 

The next morning Rafael was out again on business connected withthe patent. The bell rang, and the maid came in with a bill; ithad been brought the previous day as well, she said. It was fromone of the chief restaurateurs of the town, and was by no means asmall one. Fru Kaas had no idea that Rafael owed money--least ofall to a restaurateur. She told the maid to say that her son wasof age, and that she was not his cashier. There was another ring--the maid reappeared with a second bill, which had also beenbrought the day before. It was from a well-known wine merchant;this, too, was not a small one. Another ring; this time it was abill for flowers and by no means a trifle. This, too, had beenbrought the day before. Fru Kaas read it twice, three times, fourtimes: she could not realise that Rafael owed money for flowers--what did he want them for? Another ring; now it was a bill from ajeweller. Fru Kaas became so nervous at the ringing and the billsthat she took to flight. Here, then, was the explanation of theirpostponed departure: he was held captive; this was the reason forall his anxiety about selling the patent. He had to buy hisfreedom. She was hardly in the street when an unpretending littleold woman stepped up to her, and asked timidly if this might beFrau von Kas? Another bill, thought Fru Kaas, eyeing her closely. She reminded one of a worn-out rose-bush with a few faded blossomson it: she seemed poor and inexperienced in all save humility. 

"What do you want with me?" inquired Fru Kaas sympathetically, resolved to pay the poor thing at once, whatever it might be. 

The little woman begged "Tausend Mal um Verzeihung, " but she was"Einer Beamten-Wittwe" and had read in the paper that the youngVon Kas was leaving, and both she and her daughter were in suchdespair that she had resolved to come to Frau von Kas, who was theonly one--and here she began to cry. 

"What does your daughter want from me?" asked Fru Kaas rather lessgently. 

"Ach! tausend Mal um Verzeihung gnadige Frau, " her daughter wasmarried to Hofrath von Rathen--"ihrer grossen Schonheit wegen"--ah, she was so unhappy, for Hofrath von Rathen drank and was cruelto her. Herr von Kas had met her at the artists' fete--"Und sowissen Sie zwei so junge, reizende Leute. " She looked up at FruKaas through her tears--looked up as though from a rain-splashedcellar window; but Fru Kaas had reverted to her abrupt manner, andas if from an upper storey the poor little woman heard, "What doesyour daughter want with my son?"

"Tausend Mal um Verzeihung, " but it had seemed to them that herdaughter might go with them to Norway, Norway was such a freecountry. "Und die zwei Jungen haben sich so gern. "

"Has he promised her this?" said Fru Kaas, with haughty coldness. 

"Nein, nein, nein, " was the frightened reply. They two, mother anddaughter, had thought of it that day. They had read in the paperthat the young Von Kas was going away. "Herr Gott in Himmel!" ifher daughter could thus be rid at once of all her troubles! Frauvon Kas had not an idea of what a faithful soul, what a tenderwife her daughter was. 

Fru Kaas crossed hastily over to the opposite pavement. She didnot go quite so fast as a person in chase of his hat, but itseemed to the poor little creature, left in the lurch, with foldedhands and frightened eyes, that she had vanished faster than herhopes. On the other side of the waystood a pretty young flower-girl who was waiting for the elegant lady hurrying in herdirection. "Bitte, gnadige Frau. " Here is another, thought thehunted creature. She looked round for help, she flew up thestreet, away, away--when another lady popped up right in front ofher, evidently trying to catch her eye. Fru Kaas dashed into themiddle of the street and took refuge in a carriage. 

"Where to?" asked the driver. 

This she had not stopped to consider, but nevertheless answeredboldly, "The Bavaria!"

In point of fact she had had an idea of seeing the view of thecity and its environs from "Bavaria's" lofty head before leaving. There were a great many people there, but Fru Kaas's turn to go upsoon came; but just as she had reached the head of the giantessand was going to look out, she heard a lady whisper close behindher, "That is his mother. " It was probable that there were severalmothers up there in "Bavaria's" head beside Fru Kaas, neverthelessshe gathered her skirts together and hurried down again. 

Rafael came home to dine with his mother; he was in the highestspirits--he had sold his patent. But he found her sitting in thefarthest corner of the sofa, with her big binocular glass in herhand. When he spoke to her she did not answer, but turned theglass with the small end towards him; she wished him to look asfar off as possible. 

CHAPTER 3

It was a bright evening in the beginning of June that theydisembarked from the steamer, and at once left the town in theboat which was to take them to Hellebergene. They did not know anyof the boatmen, although they were from the estate; the boat alsowas new. 

But the islands among which they were soon rowing were the oldones, which had long awaited them and seemed to have swum out tomeet them, and now to move one behind the other so that the boatmight pass between them. Neither mother nor son spoke to the men, nor did they talk to each ether. In thus keeping silence theyentered into each other's feelings, for they were both awestruck. It came upon them all at once. The bright evening light over seaand islands, the aromatic fragrance from the land, --the quicksplash of a little coasting steamer as she passed them--nothingcould cheer them. 

Their life lay there before them, bringing responsibilities bothold and new. How would all that they were coming to look to them, and how far were they themselves now fitted for it?

Now they had passed the narrow entrance of the bay, and roundedthe last point beneath the crags of Hellebergene. The greenexpanse opened out before them, the buildings in its midst. Thehillsides had once been crowned and darkly clad with luxuriantwoods. Now they stood there denuded, shrunk, formless, spread overwith a light green growth leaving some parts bare. The lowlands, as well as the hills which framed them, were shrunk anddiminished, not in extent but in appearance. They could nutpersuade themselves to look at it. They recalled it all as it hadbeen and felt themselves despoiled. 

The buildings had been newly painted, but they looked small bycontrast with those which they had in their minds. No one awaitedthem at the landing, but a few people stood about near thegallery, looking embarrassed--or were they suspicious? Thetravellers went into Fru Kaas's old rooms, both up stairs anddown. These were just as they had left them, but how faded andwretched they looked! The table, which was laid for supper, wasloaded with coarse food like that at a farmer's wedding. 

The old lime-trees were gone. Fru Kaas wept. 

Suddenly she was reminded of something. "Let us go across to theother wing, " she said this as if there they would find what waswanting. In the gallery she took Rafael's arm; he grew curious. His father's old rooms had been entirely renovated for him. Ineverything, both great and small, he recognised his mother'sdesigns and taste. A vast amount of work, unknown to him, anendless interchange of letters and a great expenditure of money. How new and bright everything looked! The rooms differed as muchfrom what they had been, as she had endeavoured to make Rafael'slife from the one that had been led in them. 

They two had a comfortable meal together after all, followed by aquiet walk along the shore. The wide waters of the bay gleamedsoftly, and the gentle ripple took up its old story again whilethe summer night sank gently down upon them. 

Early the next morning Rafael was out rowing in the bay, the play-ground of his childhood. Notwithstanding the shorn and sunkenaspect of the hills, his delight at being there again wasindescribable. Indescribable because of the loneliness andstillness: no one came to disturb him. After having lived for manyyears in large towns, to find oneself alone in a Norwegian bay islike leaving a noisy market-place at midday and passing into ahigh vaulted church where no sound penetrates from without, andwhere only one's own footstep breaks the silence. Holiness, purification, abstraction, devotion, but in such light and freedomas no church possesses. The lapse of time, the past wereforgotten; it was as though he had never been away, as though noother place had ever known him. 

Indescribable, for the intensity of his feelings surpassedanything that he had hitherto known. New sensations, impressionsof beauty absolutely forgotten since childhood, or remembered butimperfectly, crowded upon him, speaking to him like welcomingspirits. 

The altered contour of the hills, the dear familiar smell, the skywhich seemed lower and yet farther off, the effects of light incolder tones, but paler and more delicate. Nowhere a broad plain, an endless expanse. No! all was diversified, full of contrast, broken; not lofty, still unique, fresh, he had almost saidtumultuous. 

Each moment he felt more in accord with his memories, his naturewas in harmony with it all. 

He paused between each stroke of the oars, soothed by the gentlemotion; the boat glided on, he had not concerned himself whither, when he heard from behind the sound of oars which was not the echoof his own. The strokes succeeded each other at regular intervals. He turned. 

At that moment Fru Kaas came out on to the terrace with her bigbinocular. She had had her coffee, and was ready to enjoy the viewover the bay, the islands, and the open sea. Rafael, she was told, had already gone out in the boat. Yes! there he was, far out. Sheput up her glass at the moment that a white painted boat shot outtowards his brown one. The white one was rowed by a girl in alight-coloured dress. "Grand Dieu! are there girls here too?"

Now Rafael ceases rowing, the girl does the same, they rest ontheir oars and the boats glide past each other. Fru Kaas coulddistinguish the girl's shapely neck under her dark hair, but herwide-brimmed straw hat hid her face. 

Rafael lets his oars trail along the water and resting on themlooks at her, and now her oars also touch the water as she turnstowards him. Do they know each other? Quickly the boats drawtogether; Rafael puts out his hand and draws them closer, and nowhe gives HER his hand. Fru Kaas can see Rafael's profile soplainly that she can detect the movement of his lips. He islaughing! The stranger's face is hidden by her hat, but she cansee a full figure and a vigorous arm below the half-sleeve. Theydo not loose their hands; now he is laughing till his broadshoulders shake. What is it? What is it? Can any one have followedhim from Munich? Fru Kaas could remain where she was no longer. She went indoors and put down the glass; she was overcome byanxiety, filled with helpless anger. It was some time before shecould prevail on herself to go out and resume her walk. The girlhad turned her boat. Now they are rowing in side by side, she asstrongly as he. Whenever Fru Kaas looked at her son he waslaughing and the girl's face was turned towards his. Now they headfor the landing-place at the parsonage. Was it Helene? The onlygirl for miles round, and Rafael had hooked himself on to her thevery first day that he was at home. These girls who can never seehim without taking a fancy to him! Now the boats are beached, noton the shingle, where the stones would be slippery. No! on thesand, where they have run them up as high as possible. Now shejumps lightly and quickly out of her boat, and he a little moreheavily out of his; they grasp each other's hands again. Yes!there they were. 

Fru Kaas turned away; she knew that for the moment she was nothingmore than an old chattel pushed away into a corner. 

It was Helene. She knew that they had arrived and thought that shewould row past the house; and thus it was that she had encounteredRafael, who had simply gone out to amuse himself. 

As they had lain on their oars and the boats glided silently pasteach other, he thought to himself, "That girl never grew up here, she is cast in too fine a mould for that; she is not in harmonywith the place. " He saw a face whose regular lines, and large greyeyes, harmonised well with each other, a quiet wise face, acrosswhich all at once there flew a roguish look. He knew it again. Ithad done him good before to-day. Our first thought in allrecognitions, in all remembrances--that is to say, if there isoccasion for it--is, has that which we recognise or recall done usgood or evil?

This large mouth, those honest eyes, which have a roguish lookjust now, had always, done him good. 

"Helene!" he cried, arresting the progress of his boat. 

"Rafael!" she answered, blushing crimson and checking her boattoo. 

What a soft contralto voice!

When he came in to breakfast, beaming, ready to tell everything, he was confronted by two large eyes, which said as plainly aspossible, "Am I put on one side already?" He became absolutelyangry. During breakfast she said, in a tone of indifference, thatshe was going to drive to the Dean's, to thank him for thesupervision which he had given to the estate during all theseyears. He did not answer, from which she inferred that he did notwish to go with her. It was some time before she started. Theharness was new, the stable-boy raw and untrained. She saw nothingmore of Rafael. 

She was received at the parsonage with the greatest respect, andyet very heartily. The Dean was a fine old man and thoroughlypractical. His wife was of profounder nature. Both protested thatthe care of the estate had been no trouble to them, it had onlybeen a pleasant employment; Helene had now undertaken it. 

"Helene?"

Yes; it had so chanced that the first bailiff at Hellebergene hadonce been agronomist and forester on a large concern which was inliquidation, Helene had taken such a fancy to him, that when shewas not at school, she went with him everywhere; and, indeed, hewas a wonderful old man. During these rambles she had learned allthat he could teach her. He had an especial gift for forestry. Itwas a development for her, for it gave a fresh interest to herlife. Little by little she had taken over the whole care of theestate. It absorbed her. 

Fru Kaas asked if she might see Helene, to thank her. 

"But Helene has just gone out with Rafael, has she not?"

"Yes, to be sure, " answered Fru Kaas. She would not show surprise;but she asked at once for her carriage. 

Meanwhile the two young people had determined to climb the ridge. At first they followed the course of the river, Helene leading theway. It was evident that she had grown up in the woods. How strongand supple she was, and how well she acquitted herself when shehad to cross a brook, climb a wooded slope, force a way through abarrier of bristly young fir-trees which opposed her passage, orsurmount a heap of clay at a quarry, of which there were a greatmany about there. Each difficulty was in turn overcome. The ascentfrom the river was the most direct and the pleasantest, which wasthe reason that they had come this way. Rafael would not beoutdone by her, and kept close at her heels. But, great heavens!what it cost him. Partly because he was out of practice, partly--

"It is a little difficult to get over here, " she said. A tree hadfallen during the last rainy weather, and hung half suspended byits roots, obstructing the path. "You must not hold by it, itmight give way and drag us with it. "

At last there is something which she considers difficult, hethought. 

She deliberated for a moment before the farthest-spreadingbranches which had to be crossed; then, lifting her skirts to herknees, over them she went, and over the next ones as well, andthen across the trunk to the farthest side, where there were nobranches in the way; then obliquely up the hillside. She stoodstill at the top of the height and watched him crawl up after her. 

It cost him a struggle; he was out of breath and the perspirationpoured off him. When he got up to her, everything swam before him;and although it was only for a fraction of a second, it left himfairly captivated by her strength, She stood and looked at him with bright, roguish eyes. She wasflushed and hot, and her bosom rose and fell quickly; but therewas no doubt that she could at once have taken an equally long andsteep climb. He was not able to speak a word. 

"Now turn round and look at the sea, " she said. 

The words affected him as though great Pan had uttered them fromthe mountains far behind. He turned his eyes towards them. Itseemed as though Nature herself had spoken to him. The wordscaressed him as with a hand now cold, now warm, and he became adifferent being. For he had lost himself--lost himself in her asshe walked along the river-bank and climbed the hillside. Sheseemed to draw fresh power from the woods, to grow taller, moreagile, more vigorous. The fervour of her eyes, the richness of hervoice, the grace of her movements, the glimpses of her soul, hadallured him down there in the valley, beside the rushing river, and the feeling of loss of individuality had increased with theexertion and the excitement. No ball-room or play-ground, nogymnasium or riding-school can display the physical powers, andthe spirit which underlies them, the unity of mind and body, asdoes the scaling of steep hills and rocky slopes. At last, intoxicated by these feelings, he thought to himself--I amclimbing after her, climbing to the highest pinnacle of happiness. Up there! Up there! The composure of her manner towards him, herfreedom from embarrassment, maddened him. Up there! Up there! Andever as they mounted she became more spirited, he more distressed. Up there! Up there! His eyes grew dim, for a few seconds he couldnot move, could not speak. Then she had said, "Now you must lookat the sea. "

He seemed to see with different eyes, to be endowed with newsensations, and these new sensations gave answer to what thedistant mountains had said. They answered the sea out there beforehim, the island-studded sea, the open sea beyond, the wideswelling ocean, the desires and destinies of life all the worldover. The sea lay steel-bright beneath the suffused sunlight, andseemed to gaze on the rugged land as on a beloved child instinctwith vital power. Cling thou to the mighty one, or thy strengthwill be thine undoing!

And many of the inventions which he had dreamed of loomed vaguelybefore him. They lay outside there. It depended on him whether heshould one day bring them safely into port. 

"What are you thinking about?" said she, the sound of her voiceput these thoughts to flight and recalled him to the present. Hefelt how full and rich her contralto voice was, A moment ago hecould have told her this, and more besides, as an introduction tostill more. Now he sat down without answering, and she did thesame. 

"I come up here very often, " she said, "to look at the sea. Fromhere it seems the source of life and death; down there it is amere highway. " He smiled. She continued: "The sea has this power, that whatever pre-occupation one may bring up here, it vanishes ina moment; but down below it remains with one. "

He looked at her. 

"Yes, it is true, " said she, and coloured. 

"I do not in the least doubt it, " he replied. 

But she did not continue the subject. "You are looking at thesaplings, I see. "

"Yes. "

"You must know that last year there was a long drought; almost allthe young trees up here withered away, and in other places on thehillsides also, as you see. " She pointed as she spoke. "It looksso ugly as one comes into the bay. I thought about that yesterday. I thought also that you should not be here long before you sawthat you had done us an injustice, for could anything be prettierthan that little fir-tree down there in the hollow? just look atits colour; that is a healthy fellow! and these sturdy saplings, and that little gem there!" The tones of Helene's voice betrayedthe interest which she felt. "But how that one over there hasgrown. " She scrambled across to it, and he after her. "Do you see?two branches already; and what branches!" They knelt down besideit. "This boy has had parents of whom he can boast, for they haveall had just as much and just as little shelter. Oh! thedisgusting caterpillars. " She was down before the little tree atthe side which was being spun over. She cleared it, and got up tofetch some wet mould, which she laid carefully round the sprouts. "Poor thing I it wants water, although it rained tremendously alittle time ago. "

"Are you often up here?" he asked. 

"It would all come to nothing if I were not!" She looked at himsearchingly. "You do not, perhaps, believe that this little treeknows me; every one of them, indeed. If I am long away from themthey do not thrive, but when I am often with them they flourish. "She was on her knees, supporting herself with one hand, while withthe other she pulled up some grass. "The thieves, " said she, "which want to rob my saplings. "

If it had been a little person who had said this; a little personwith lively eyes and a merry mouth--but Helene was tall andstately; her eyes were not lively, but met one with a steady gaze. Her mouth was large, and gave deliberate utterance to herthoughts. 

Whoever has read Helene's words quickly, hurriedly, must read themover again. She spoke quietly and thoughtfully, each syllabledistinct and musical. She was not the same girl who had led theway by river and hill. Then she seemed to glory in her strength;now her energy had changed to delicate feeling. 

One of the most remarkable women in Scandinavia, who also hadthese two sides to her character, and made the fullest use ofboth, Johanne Luise Hejberg, once saw Helene when she had but justattained to womanhood. She could not take her eyes off her; shenever tired of watching her and listening to her. Did the agedwoman, then at the close of her life, recognise anything of herown youth in the girl? Outwardly too they resembled each other. Helene was dark, as Fru Hejberg had been; was about the sameheight, with the same figure, but stronger; had a large mouth, large grey eyes like hers, into which the same roguish look wouldstart. But the greatest likeness was to be found in their natures:in Fru Hejberg's expression when she was quiet and serious; in acertain motherliness which was the salient feature in her nature. 

"What a healthy girl!" said she; bade some one bring Helene toher, and drawing her towards her, kissed her on the forehead. 

Helene and her companion had crossed to the other side of thehill, for he positively must see the "Buckthorn Swamp"; but whenthey got down there he did not know it again: it was covered byluxuriant woods. 

"Yes! It is old Helgesen who deserves the credit of that, " shesaid. "He noticed that an artificial embankment had converted thisgreat flat into a swamp, so he cut through it. I was only a childthen, but I had my share in it. They gave me a bit of ground downby the river to plant Kohl Kabi in. I looked after it the wholesummer. Later on I had a larger piece. With the profits we cutditches up to here. In the fourth year we bought plants. In fact, he so arranged it, that I paid for it all with my work, the oldrogue!"

When Rafael got home his mother was at table: she had not waitedfor him, a sure sign that she felt aggrieved. No attempts on hispart to set things right succeeded. She would not answer, and soonleft the room. It now struck him how pleasant it would have beenfor his mother if he had taken her with him to explore and makeacquaintance with this new Hellebergene. The evening before, inhis father's rooms, it had seemed as though nothing could everseparate them--and the first thing in the morning he was off withsome one else. This evening he knew that nothing could be done, but next morning he begged her earnestly to come with them, andthey would show her what he had seen the day before; but she onlyshook her head and took up a book. Day after day he made a similarrequest, but always with the same result. She thought that theseinvitations were merely formal, and so, from one point of view, they were. He was most ready to appease her, most ready to showher everything, for he felt himself to blame, though he certainlythought that she might have understood; but her presence wouldhave marred their tete-a-tete; he would have been embarrassedenough if she had acquiesced!

The Dean, with his wife and daughter, came the following Sunday toreturn Fru Kaas's visit. She was politeness itself, and speciallythanked Helene for her care of Hellebergene. Helene colouredwithout knowing why, but when Rafael also coloured, she blushedstill deeper. This was the event of the visit; nothing else ofimportance occurred. 

In their daily walks through the fields and woods, the two youngpeople soon exhausted the topic of Hellebergene. He took upanother theme. His inventions became the topic of conversation. Hehad acquired, from his studies with his mother, an unusualfacility in explaining his meaning, and in Helene he found alistener such as he had rarely before met with. She wassufficiently acquainted with the laws of nature to understand asimple description. But all the same it was not his inventions buthimself that he discoursed on. He quite realised this, and becameall the more eager. Her eyes made his reasoning clearer. He hadnever before had such complete faith in himself as when near her, and now no misgivings succeeded. 

Helene, however, had not hitherto known the direction and resultsof his studies. He was an engineer, that was all that she hadheard on the subject. When he had told her more about it he roseconsiderably in her estimation. It was SHE now who began to feelconstrained. At first she did not understand why she felt obligedto put more restraint upon herself. After a time she began toexcuse herself from joining him, and their walks became more rare. "She had so much to do now. "

He did not comprehend the reason of this; he fancied that hismother might be to blame (which, by the way, was quite a mistake), and he grew angry. He was already greatly affronted that hismother had chosen to confound his former gallantries with hispresent attachment. He quite forgot that at first he had merelysought to amuse himself here as elsewhere. He gave himself upentirely to his passion, which would brook no hindrance, noopposition; it became majestic. In Helene he had found his futurelife. 

But her parents had grown less cordial of late owing to Fru Kaas'scoldness, and the time came when all attempts to obtain meetingswith Helene failed. He had never been so infatuated. He seemed tosee her continually before him--her luxuriant beauty, her lightstep, her grey eyes gazing steadfastly into his. 

Why could they not be married to-morrow or the next day? Whatcould be more natural? What could more certainly help him forward?

The constraint between his mother and himself had reached agreater pitch than ever before. He thought seriously of leavingher and the country. He still had some money left, the proceeds ofthe patent, and he could easily make more. How irksome it becameto him to go into the fields and woods without Helene! He couldnot study; he had no one to talk to; what should he do?

Devote himself to boating!--row out far beyond the bay, right upto the town! One day, as he rowed along the coast, beyond the bay, he noticed that the clay and flag-stone formation in the hills andridges was speckled with grey. Helene had told him howextraordinary it looked out there now that the trees were gone, but as they would have had to come out in the boat to see it hehad let the remark pass. Now he decided to land there. The shorerose steeply from the water, but he scrambled up. He had expectedto find limestone, but he could hardly believe his own eyes: itwas cement stone! Absolutely, undoubtedly, cement stone! How fardid it extend? As far as he could see; it might even extend to theboundary of the estate. In any case, here was sufficient forextensive works for many, many years, if only there were enoughsilica with the clay and lime. He had soon knocked off a fewpieces, which he put into the boat, and set out for home toanalyse them. 

Seldom had any one rowed faster than he did; now he shot past theislands into the bay, up to the landing-place before the house. Ifthe cement stone contained the right proportions, here was whatwould make Helene and himself independent of every one; AND THATAT ONCE!

A little later, with dirty hands and clothes, his face bathed inperspiration, he rushed up to his mother with the result of hisinvestigations. 

"Here is something for you to see. "

She was reading; she looked up and turned as white as a sheet. 

"Is that the cement stone?" she asked, as she put down her book. 

"Did you know about it?" he exclaimed, in the greatestastonishment. 

"Good gracious, yes, " she answered. She walked across to thewindow, came back again, pressing her hands together. "So you havefound it too?"

"Who did before me?"

"Your father, Rafael, your father, the first time that I was here, a little time before we were to leave. " She paused. "He camerushing in as you did just now--not so quickly, not so quickly, hewas weak in the legs, but otherwise just like you. " She let hereyes rest, with a peculiar look, on Rafael's dirty hands. Thehands themselves were not well shaped, they were almost exactlyhis father's. 

Rafael noticed nothing. 

"Had HE found the bed of cement stone, then?"

"Yes. He locked the door behind him. I got up from my chair andasked him how he dared? He could hardly speak. " She paused for amoment, recalling it all again. "Yes, and it was THAT stuff. "

"What did he say, mother?"

She had turned to leave the room. 

"Your father believed that I had brought luck to the house. "

"And why was it not so, then?"

She faced him quickly. He coloured. 

"Pardon, mother, you misunderstood me. I meant, why did it come tonothing about the cement?"

"You did not know your father: there were too many hooks about himfor him to be able to carry out anything. "

"Hooks?"

"Yes! eccentricity, egotism, passion, which caught fast ineverything. "

"What did he propose to do?"

"No one was to be allowed to have anything to do with it, no onewas to know of it, he was to be everything! For this reason thetimber was to be cut down and sold; and when we were married--Isay when we were married, the whole of my fortune was to be usedas well. "

He saw the horror with which she still regarded it; she waspassing through the whole struggle again; and he understood thathe must not question her further. She made a gesture with herhand; and he asked hurriedly, "Why did you not tell me before, mother?"

"Because it would have brought you no good, " she answereddecidedly. 

He felt, nay, he saw that she believed that it would bring him nogood now. She again raised her hand, and he left her. 

When he was once more in the boat, taking his great news to theparsonage, he thought to himself, Here is the reason of myfather's and mother's deadly enmity. 

The cement stone! She did not trust him, she would not give himboth herself and her fortune, so there was no cement, nor were anytrees felled. 

"Well, he scored after all. Yes, and mother too; but God help ME!"

Then he reckoned up what the timber and the fortune together wouldhave been worth, and what further sum could have been raised onthe property, the value of the cement-bed being taken intoconsideration. He understood his father better than his mother. What a fortune, what power, what magnificence, what a life!

At the parsonage he carried every one with him. 

The Dean, because he saw at once what this was worth. "You are arich man now, " he said. The Dean's wife, because she feltattracted by his ability and enthusiasm. Helene? Helene was silentand frightened. He turned towards her and asked if she would comewith him in the boat to see it. She really must see how extensivethe bed was. 

"Yes, dear, go with him, " said her father. 

Rafael wished to sit behind her in the boat and hastened towardsthe bow; but, without a word, she passed him, sat down, and tookher oars; so, after all, he had to sit in front of her. 

They thus began at cross purposes. His back was towards her, hesaw how the water foamed under her oars, there was a secretstruggle, a tacit fear, which was heard in the few words whichthey exchanged, and which merely increased their constraint. 

When they drew near to their destination they were flushed andhot. Now he was obliged to turn round to look for the place oflanding. To begin with, they went slowly along the whole cement-bed as far as it was visible. He was now turned so as to face her, and he explained it all to her. She kept her eyes fixed on thecliff, and only glanced at him, or did not look at him all. Theyturned the boat again, in order to land at the place where heintended the factory to stand. A portion of the rock would have tobe blasted to make room, the harbour too must be made safer sothat vessels might lie close in, and all this would cost money. 

He landed first in order to help her, but she jumped on shorewithout his assistance; then they climbed upwards, he leading theway, explaining everything as he went; she following with eyes andears intent. 

All for which, from her childhood, she had worked so hard atHellebergene, and all which she had dreamed of for the estate, hadbecome so little now. It would be many years before the treesyielded any return. But here was promise of immediate prosperityand future wealth if, as she never doubted, he proved to becorrect. She felt that this humbled her, made her of no account, but ah! how great it made him seem!

The rowing, the climbing, the excitement, gave animation toRafael's explanations; face and figure showed his state oftension. She felt almost giddy: should she return to the boat androw away alone? But she was too proud thus to betray herself. 

It seemed to her that there was the look of a conqueror in hiseyes; but she did not intend to be conquered. Neither did she wishto appear as the one who had remained at home and speculated onhis return. That would be simply to turn all that was mostcherished, most unselfish in her life, against herself. Somethingin him frightened her, something which, perhaps, he himself couldnot master--his inward agitation. It was not boisterous orterrifying; it was glowing, earnest zeal, which seemed to deprivehim of power and her of will, and this she would not endure. 

Hardly had they gained the summit from which they could look outover the islands to the open sea, and across to Hellebergene, tothe parsonage, and the river flowing into the inner bay, than heturned away from it all towards her, as she stood with heavingbreast, glowing cheeks, and eyes which dare not turn away from thesea. 

"Helene, " he whispered, approaching her; he wished to take her inhis arms. 

She trembled, although she did not turn round; the next moment shesprang away from him, and did not pause till she had got down tothe boat, which she was about to push off, but bethought herselfthat it would be too cowardly, so she remained standing andwatched him come after her. 

"Helene, " he called from above, "why do you run away from me?"

"Rafael, you must not, " she answered when he rejoined her. Thestrongest accent of both prayer and command of which a powerfulnature is capable sounded in her words. She in the boat, he on theshore; they eyed one another like two antagonists, watchful andbreathing hard, till he loosed the boat, stepped in and pushedoff. 

She took her seat; but before doing the same he said:

"You know quite well what I wanted to say to you. " He spoke withdifficulty. 

She did not answer and got out her oars; her tears were ready toflow. They rowed home again more slowly than they had come. 

A lark hovered over their heads. The note of a thrush was heardaway inland. A guillemot skimmed over the water in the samedirection as their own, and a tern on curved wing screamed intheir wake. There was a sense of expectation over all. The scentof the young fir-trees and the heather was wafted out to them;farther in lay the flowery meadows of Hellebergene. At a greatdistance an eagle could be seen, high in air, winging his way fromthe mountains, followed by a flock of screaming crows, whoimagined that they were chasing him. Rafael drew Helene'sattention to them. 

"Yes, look at them, " she said; and these few words, spokennaturally, helped to put both more at their ease. He looked roundat her and smiled, and she smiled back at him. He felt in theseventh heaven of delight, but it must not be spoken. But the oarsseemed to repeat in measured cadence, "It--is--she. It--is--she. It--is--she. " He said to himself, Is not her resistance a thousandtimes sweeter than--

"It is strange that the sea birds no longer breed on the islandsin here, " he said. 

"That is because for a long time the birds have not beenprotected; they have gone farther out. "

"They must be protected again: we must manage to bring the birdsback, must we not?"

"Yes, " she answered. 

He turned quickly towards her. Perhaps she should not have saidthat, she thought, for had he not said "we"?

To show how far she was from such a thought, she looked towardsthe land. "The clover is not good this year. "

"No. What shall you do with the plot next year?"

But she did not fall into the trap. He turned round, but shelooked away. 

Now the rush of the river tossed them up and down in a giddydance, as the force of the stream met the boat. Rafael looked upto where they had walked together the first day. He turned to seeif she were not, by chance, looking in the same direction. Yes, she was!

They rowed on towards the landing-place at the parsonage, and hespoke once or twice, but she had learned that that was dangerous. They reached the beach. 

"Helene!" said he, as she jumped on shore with a good-bye inpassing, "Helene!" But she did not stay. "Helene!" he shouted, with such meaning in it that she turned. 

She looked at him, but only remained for a moment. No more wasneeded! He rowed home like the greatest conqueror that thosewaters had ever seen. Ever since the Vikings had met together inthe innermost creek, and left behind them the barrow which isstill to be seen near the parsonage--yes, ever since the elk ofthe primaeval forest, with mighty antlers, swam away from the doewhich he had won in combat, to the other which he heard on theopposite shore. Since the first swarm of ants, like a waving fan, danced up and down in the sunlight, on its one day of flight. Since the first seals struggled against each other to reach theone whom they saw lie sunning herself on the rocks. 

Fru Kaas had seen them pass as they rowed out at a furious pace. She had seen them row slowly back, and she understood everything. No sooner had the cement stone been found than--

She paced up and down; she wept. 

She did not put any dependence on his constancy; in any case itwas too early for Rafael to settle himself here: he had somethingvery different before him. The cement stone would not run awayfrom him, or the girl either, if there were anything serious init. She regarded his meeting with Helene as merely an obstacle inthe way, which barred his further progress. 

Rafael rowed towards home, bending to his oars till the waterfoamed under the bow of his boat. Now he has landed; now he dragsthe boat up as if she were an eel-pot. Now he strides quickly upto the house. 

Frightened, despairing, his mother shrank into the farthest cornerof the sofa, with her feet drawn up under her, and, as he burst inthrough the door and began to speak, she cried out: "Taisez-vous!des egards, s'il vous plait. " She stretched out her arms beforeher as if for protection. But now he came, borne on the wings oflove and happiness. His future was there. 

He did what he had never done before: went straight up to her, drew her arms down, embraced and kissed her, first on theforehead, then on the cheeks, eyes, mouth, ears, neck, wherever hecould; all without a word. 

He was quite beside himself. 

"Mad boy, " she gasped; "des egards, mais Rafael, donc!--Que--" Andshe threw herself on his breast with her arms round his neck. 

"Now you will forsake me, Rafael, " she said, crying. 

"Forsake you, mother! No one can unite the two wings like Helene. "

And now he began a panegyric on her, without measure, andunconscious that he said the same thing over and over again. Whenhe became quieter, and she was permitted to breathe, she begged tobe alone: she was used to being alone. In the evening she camedown to him, and said that, first of all, they ought to go toChristiania, and find an expert to examine the cement-bed andlearn what further should be done. Her cousin, the GovernmentSecretary, would be able to advise them, and some of her otherrelations as well. Most of them were engineers and men ofbusiness. He was reluctant to leave Hellebergene just now, hesaid, she must understand that; besides, they had agreed not to goaway until the autumn. But she maintained that this was the surestway to win Helene; only she begged that, with regard to her, things should remain as they were till they had been toChristiania. On this point she was inflexible, and it was soarranged. 

As was their custom, they packed up at once. They drove over tothe parsonage that same evening to say good-bye. They were allvery merry there: on Fru Kaas's side because she was uneasy, andwished to conceal the fact by an appearance of liveliness; on theDean's part because he really was in high spirits at the discoverywhich promised prosperity both to Hellebergene and the district;on his wife's because she suspected something. The most heartygood wishes were therefore expressed for their journey. 

Rafael had availed himself of the general preoccupation toexchange a few last words with Helene in a corner. He obtained ahalf-promise from her that when he wrote she would answer; but hewas careful not to say that he had spoken to his mother. He feltthat Helene would be startled by a proceeding which came quitenaturally to him. 

As they drove away, he waved his hat as long as they remained insight. The waving was returned, first by all, but finally by onlyone. 

The summer evening was light and warm, but not light enough, notwarm enough, not wide enough; there did not seem room enough in itfor him; it was not bright enough to reflect his happiness. Hecould not sleep, yet he did not wish to talk; companionship orsolitude were alike distasteful to him. He thought seriously ofwalking or rowing over to the parsonage again and knocking at thewindow of Helene's room. He actually went down to the boathouseand got out the boat. But perhaps it would frighten her, andpossibly injure his own cause. So he rowed out and out to thefarthest islands, and there he frightened the birds. At hisapproach they rose: first a few, then many, then all protested ina hideous chorus of wild screams. He was enveloped in an angrycrowd, a pandemonium of birds. But it did not ruffle his goodhumour. "Wait a bit, " he said to them. "Wait a bit, until theislands at Hellebergene are 'protected, ' and the whole estate aswell. Then you shall come and be happy with us. Good-bye tillthen!"

CHAPTER 4

He came to Christiania like a tall ship gay with flags. His lovewas the music on board. 

His numerous relations were ready to receive him. Of these manywere engineers, who were a jour with all his writings, which theyhad taken care should be well known. Some of the largestmechanical undertakings in the country were in their hands, sothat they had connections in every direction. 

Once more the family had a genius in its midst; that is to say, one to make a show with. Rafael went from entertainment toentertainment, from presentation to presentation, and wherever heor his mother went court was paid to them. 

In all this the ladies of the family were even more active thantheir lords; and they had not been in the town many days beforeevery one knew that they were to be the rage. 

There are some people who always will hold aloof. They are asirresponsive as a sooty kettle when you strike it. They are likepeevish children who say "I won't, " or surly old dogs who growl atevery one. But HE was so exceedingly genial, a capital fellow withthe highest spirits. He had looks as well; he was six feet high;and all those six feet were clothed in perfect taste. He had largeflashing eyes and a broad forehead. He was practised in makingclear to others all in which he was interested, and at such timeshow handsome he looked! He was a thorough man of the world, ableto converse in several languages at the cosmopolitan dinners whichwere a speciality of the Ravns. He was the owner of one of the fewextensive estates in Norway, and had the control, it was said, ofa considerable fortune besides. 

The half of this would have been enough to set all tongueswagging; therefore, first the family, then their friends, then thewhole town feted him. He was a nine days' wonder! One must knowthe critical, unimaginative natives of Christiania, who daily pickeach other to pieces to fill the void in their existences; onemust have admired their endless worrying of threadbare topics tounderstand what it must be when they got hold of a fresh theme. 

Nothing which flies before the storm is more dangerous than desertsand, nothing can surpass a Christiania FUROR. 

When it became known that two of his relations who were conversantwith the subject, together with a distinguished geologist and asuperintendent of mines, had been down to Hellebergene withRafael, and had found that his statements were well grounded, hewas captured and borne off in triumph twenty times a day. It wastrying work, but HE was always in the vein, and ready to take therough with the smooth. In all respects the young madcap was up tothe standard, so that day and night passed in a ceaseless whirl, which left every one but himself breathless. The glorious month atHellebergene had done good. He was drawn into endless jovialadventures, so strange, so audacious, that one would have stakedone's existence that such things were impossible in Christiania. But great dryness begets thirst. He was in the humour of a boy whohas got possession of a jam-pot, whose mouth, nose, and hands areall besmirched. It is thus that ladies like children best; thenthey are the sweetest things in the world. 

Like a tall, full-grown mountain-ash covered by a flock ofstarlings, he was the centre of a fluttering crowd. It onlyremained for him to be deified, and this too came to pass. One dayhe visited several factories, giving a hint here, another there(he had great practical knowledge and a quick eye) and every hintwas of value. 

At last in a factory of something the same description as the onein France where he had been the means of economising half themotive power, he suggested a similar plan; he saw on the spot howit could be effected. This became the subject of muchconversation. It grew and grew, it rose like the sea after days ofwesterly gales. This new genius, but little over twenty, wouldsurely some day be the wonder of the country. It soon became thefashion for every manufacturer to invite him to visit his factory, and it was only after they were convinced that they had a godamong them that it became serious, for enthusiasm in amanufacturer strikes every one. The ladies only waited for thisimportant moment to go at a bound from the lowest degree of senseto the fifth degree of madness. Their eyes danced on him likesunlight on polished metal. He himself paid little heed to degreeor temperature; he was too happy in his genial contentment, andtoo indifferent as well. One thing which greatly helped to bringhim to the right pitch was the family temperament, for it was solike his own. He was a Ravn through and through, with perhaps alittle grain of Kaas added. He was what they called pure Ravn, quite unalloyed. He seemed to them to have come straight from thefountain-head of their race, endowed with its primitive strength. This strong physical attribute had perhaps made his abilities morefertile, but the family claimed the abilities, too, as their own. 

Through Hans Ravn, Rafael had learned to value the companionshipof his relations; now he had it in perfection. For every word thathe said appreciative laughter was ready--it really sparkled roundhim. When he disagreed with prevailing tastes, prejudices, andmorals, they disagreed too. When his precocious intelligence burstupon them, they were always ready to applaud. They even met himhalf-way--they could foresee the direction of his thoughts. As hewas young in years and disposition, and at the same time knew morethan most young people, he suited both old and young. Ah! how heprospered in Norway!

His mother went with him everywhere. Her life had at one timeappeared to her relations to be most objectless, but how much shehad made of it! They respected her persevering efforts to attainthe goal, and she became aware of this. In the most eleganttoilettes, with her discreet manner and distinguished deportment, she was hurried from party to party, from excursion to excursion, until it became too much for her. 

It went too far, too; her taste was offended by it; she grewfrightened. But the train of dissipation went on without her, likea string of carriages which bore him along with it while she wasshaken off. Her eyes followed the cloud of dust far away, and theroll of the wheels echoed back to her. 

Helene--how about Helene? Was she too out in the cold? Far fromit. Rafael was as certain that she was with him as that his goldwatch was next his heart. The very first day that he arrived hewrote a letter to her. It was not long, he had not time for that, but it was thoroughly characteristic. He received an answer atonce; the hostess of the pension brought it to him herself. He wasso immensely delighted that the lady, who was related to the Deanand who had noticed the post mark, divined the whole affair--athing which amused him greatly. 

But Helene's letter was evasive; she evidently knew him too littleto dare to speak out. 

He never found time to draw the hostess into conversation on thesubject, however. He came home late, he got up late, and thenthere were always friends waiting for him; so that he was not seenin the pension again until he returned to dress for dinner, duringwhich time the carriage waited at the door, for he never got hometill the last moment. 

When could he write? It would soon all be done with, and then hometo Helene!

The business respecting the cement detained him longer than he hadanticipated. His mother made complications; not that she opposedthe formation of a company, but she raised many difficulties: sheshould certainly prefer to have the whole affair postponed. He hadno time to talk her round, besides, she irritated him. He told itto the hostess. 

A curious being, this hostess, who directed the pension, thebusiness of the inmates, and a number of children, withoutapparent effort. She was a widow; two of her children were nearlytwenty, but she looked scarcely thirty. Tall, dark, clever, witheyes like glowing coals; decided, ready in conversation as inbusiness, like an officer long used to command, always trusted, always obeyed; one yielded oneself involuntarily to her matter-of-course way of arranging everything, and she was obliging, evenself-sacrificing, to those she liked--it was true that that wasnot everybody. This absence of reserve was especiallycharacteristic of her, and was another reason why all relied onher. She had long ago taken up Fru Kaas--entertained her first andforemost. Angelika Nagel used in conversation modern Christianiaslang which is the latest development of the language. In thechoice of expressions, words such as hideous were applied to whatwas the very opposite of hideous, such as "hideously amusing, ""hideously handsome. " "Snapping" to anything that was liquid, as"snapping good punch. " One did not say "PRETTY" but "quite toopretty" or "hugely pretty. " On the other hand, one did not say"bad" for anything serious, but with comical moderation "baddish. "Anything that there was much of went by miles; for instance, "miles of virtue. " This slipshod style of talk, which the idlersof large towns affect, had just become the fashion in Christiania. All this seemed new and characteristic to the careless emancipatedparty which had arisen as a protest against the prudery which FruKaas, in her time, had combated. The type therefore amused her:--she studied it. 

Angelika Nagel relieved her of all her business cares, which wereonly play to her. It was the same thing with the question of thecement undertaking. In an apparently careless manner she let dropwhat had been said and done about it, which had its effect on FruKaas. Soon things had progressed so far that it became necessaryto consult Rafael about it, and as he was difficult to catch, shesat up for him at night. The first time that she opened the doorfor him he was absolutely shy, and when he heard what she wantedhim for he was above measure grateful. The next time he kissedher! She laughed and ran away without speaking to him--that wasall he got for his pains. But he had held her in his arms, and heglowed with a suddenly awakened passion. 

She, in the meantime, kept out of his way, even during the day henever saw her unless he sought her. But when he least expected itshe again met him at the door; there was something which shereally MUST say to him. There was a struggle, but at last shetwisted herself away from him and disappeared. He whispered afterher as loud as he dared, "Then I shall go away!"

But while he was undressing she slipped into his room. 

The next day, before he was quite awake, the postman brought himthe warrant for a post-office order for fifteen thousand francs. He thought that there must be a mistake in the name, or else thatit was a commission that had been entrusted to him. No! it wasfrom the French manufacturer whose working expenses he had reducedso greatly. He permitted himself, he wrote, to send this as amodest honorarium. He had not been able to do so sooner, but nowhoped that it would not end there. He awaited Rafael'sacknowledgment with great anxiety, as he was not sure of hisaddress. 

Rafael was up and dressed in a trice. He told his news to everyone, ran down to his mother and up again; but he had not been amoment alone before the superabundance of happiness and sense ofvictory frightened him. Now there must be an end of all this, nowhe would go home. He had not had the slightest prickings ofconscience, the slightest longings, until now; all at once theywere uncontrollable. SHE stood upon the hilltop, pure and noble. It became agonising. He must go at once, or it would drive himmad. This anxiety was made less acute by the sight of his mother'ssincere pleasure. She came up to him when she heard that he hadshut himself into his room. They had a really comfortable talktogether--finally about the state of their finances. They lived inthe pension because they could no longer afford to live in anhotel. The estate would bring nothing in until the timber oncemore became profitable, and her capital was no longer intact--notwithstanding the prohibition. Now she was ready to let himarrange about the cement company. On this he went out into thetown, where his court soon gathered round him. 

But the large sum of money which was required could not be raisedin a day, so the affair dragged on. He grew impatient, he must andwould go; and finally his mother induced her cousin, theGovernment Secretary, to form the company, and they prepared toleave. They paid farewell visits to some of their friends, andsent cards and messages of thanks to the rest. Everything wasready, the very day had come, when Rafael, before he was up, received a letter from the Dean. 

An anonymous letter from Christiania, he wrote, had drawn hisattention to Rafael's manner of life there, and he had inconsequence obtained further information, the result being that hewas, that day, sending his daughter abroad. There was nothing morein the letter. But Rafael could guess what had passed betweenfather and daughter. 

He dressed himself and rushed down to his mother. His indignationagainst the rascally creatures who had ruined his and Helene'sfuture--"Who could it have been?"--was equalled by his despair. She was the only one he cared for; all the others might go to thedeuce. He felt angry, too, that the Dean, or any one else, shouldhave dared to treat him in this way, to dismiss him like aservant, not to speak to him, not to put him in a position tospeak for himself. 

His mother had read the letter calmly, and now she listened to himcalmly, and when he became still more furious she burst outlaughing. It was not their habit to settle their differences bywords; but this time it flashed into his mind that she had notpersuaded him to come here merely on account of the cement, but inorder to separate him from Helene, and this he said to her. 

"Yes, " he added, "now it will be just the same with me as it waswith my father, and it will be your fault this time as well. " Withthis he went out. 

Fru Kaas left Christiania shortly afterwards, and he left the sameevening--for France. 

From France he wrote the most pressing letter to the Dean, begginghim to allow Helene to return home, so that they could be marriedat once. Whatever the Dean had heard about his life in Christianiahad nothing to do with the feelings which he nourished for Helene. She, and she alone, had the power to bind him; he would remainhers for life. 

The Dean did not answer him. 

A month later he wrote again, acknowledging this time that he hadbehaved foolishly. He had been merely thoughtless. He had been ledon by other things. The details were deceptive, but he swore thatthis should be the end of it all. He would show that he deservedto be trusted; nay, he HAD shown it ever since he leftChristiania. He begged the Dean to be magnanimous. This waspractically exile for him, for he could not return to Hellebergenewithout Helene. Everything which he loved there had becomeconsecrated by her presence; every project which he had formedthey had planned together; in fact, his whole future--He frettedand pined till he found it impossible to work as seriously as hewished to do. 

This time he received an answer--a brief one. 

The Dean wrote that only a lengthened probation could convincethem of the sincerity of his purpose. 

So it was not to be home, then, and not work; at all events, notwork of any value. He knew his mother too well to doubt that nowthe cement business was shelved, whether the company were formedor not--he was only too sure of that. 

He had written to his mother, begging earnestly to be forgiven forwhat he had said. She must know that it was only the heat of themoment. She must know how fond he was of her, and how unhappy hefelt at being in discord with her on the subject which was, andalways would be, most dear to him. 

She answered him prettily and at some length, without a word aboutwhat had happened or about Helene. She gave him a great deal ofnews, among other things what the Dean intended to do about theestate. 

From this he concluded that she was on the same terms with theDean as before. Perhaps his latest reasons for deferring theaffair was precisely this: that he saw that Fru Kaas did notinterest herself for it. 

It wore on towards the autumn. All this uncertainty made him feellonely, and his thoughts turned towards his friends atChristiania. He wrote to tell them that he intended to maketowards home. He meant, however, to remain a little time atCopenhagen. 

At Copenhagen he met Angelika Nagel again. She was in company withtwo of his student friends. She was in the highest spirits, glowing with health and beauty, and with that jaunty assurancewhich turns the heads of young men. 

He had, during all this time, banished the subject of his intriguefrom his mind, and he came there without the least intention ofrenewing it; but now, for the first time in his life, he becamejealous!

It was quite a novel feeling, and he was not prepared to resistit. He grew jealous if he so much as saw her in company witheither of the young men. She had a hearty outspoken manner, whichrekindled his former passion. 

Now a new phase of his life began, divided between furiousjealousy and passionate devotion. This led, after her departure, to an interchange of letters, which ended in his following her toChristiania. 

On board the steamer he overheard a conversation between thesteward and stewardess. "She sat up for him of nights till she gotwhat she wanted, and now she has got hold of him. "

It was possible that this conversation did not concern him, but itwas equally possible that the woman might have been in thepension at Christiania. He did not know her. 

It is strange that in all such intrigues as his with Angelika thepersons concerned are always convinced that they are invisible. Hebelieved that, up to this time, no human being had known anythingabout it. The merest suspicion that this was not the case made italtogether loathsome. 

The pension--Angelika--the letters. He would be hanged if hewould go on with it for any earthly inducement. Had Angelikaangled for him and landed him like a stupid fat fish? He had beenabsolutely unsuspicious. The whole affair had been withoutimportance, until they met again at Copenhagen. Perhaps THAT, too, had been a deep-laid plan. 

Nothing can more wound a man's vanity than to find that, believinghimself a victor, he is in truth a captive. 

Rafael paced the deck half the night, and when he reachedChristiania went to an hotel, intending to go home the next day toHellebergene, come what would. This and everything of the kindmust end for ever: it simply led straight to the devil. When oncehe was at home, and could find out where Helene was, the restwould soon be settled. 

From the hotel he went up to Angelika Nagel's pension to say thatsome luggage which was there was to be sent down to the hotel atonce--he was leaving that afternoon. 

He had dined and gone up to his room to pack, when Angelika stoodbefore him. She was at once so pretty and so sad-looking that hehad never seen anything more pathetic. 

Had he really kept away from her house? Was he going at once?

She wept so despairingly that he, who was prepared for anythingrather than to see her so inconsolable, answered her evasively. 

Their relations, he said, had had no more significance than achance meeting. This they both understood; therefore she mustrealise that, sooner or later, it must end. And now the time wascome. 

Indeed, it had more significance, she said. There had never beenany one to whom she had been so much attached; this she had provedto him. Now she had come here to tell him that she was enceinte. She was in as great despair about it as any one could be. It wasruin for herself and her children. She had never contemplatedanything so frightful, but her mad love had carried her away; sonow she was where she deserved to be. 

Rafael did not answer, for he could not collect his thoughts. Shesat at a table, her face buried in her hands, but his eye fell onher strong arms in the close-fitting sleeves, her little footthrust from beneath her dress; he saw how her whole frame wasshaken by sobs. Nevertheless, what first made him collect histhoughts was not sympathy with her who was here before him; it wasthe thought of Helene, of the Dean, of his mother: what would THEYsay?

As though she were conscious whither his thoughts had flown, sheraised her head. "Will you really go away from me?" What despairwas in her face! The strong woman was weaker than a child. 

He stood erect before her, beside his open trunk. He, too, wasabsolutely miserable. 

"What good will it do for me to stay here?" he asked gently. 

Her eyes fixed themselves on him, dilating, becoming clearer everymoment. Her mouth grew scornful. She seemed to grow taller everymoment. 

"You will marry me if you are an honourable man!"

"Marry--you?" he exclaimed, first startled, then disdainful. Anevil expression came into her eyes; she thrust her head forward;the whole woman collected herself for the attack like a tiger-cat, but it ended with a violent blow on the table. 

"Yes you SHALL, devil take me!" she whispered. 

She rushed past him to the window. What was she going to do?

She opened it, screamed out he could not clearly hear what, leantfar out, and screamed again; then closed it, and turned towardshim, threatening, triumphant. He was as white as a sheet, notbecause he was frightened or dreaded her threats, but because herecognised in her a mortal enemy. He braced himself for thestruggle. 

She saw this at once. She was conscious of his strength before hehad made a movement. There was that in his eye, in his wholedemeanour, which SHE would never be able to overcome: a look ofdetermination which one would not willingly contest. If he had notunderstood her till now, he had equally revealed himself to her. 

All the more wildly did she love him. He rejoiced that he hadtaken no notice of what she had done, but turned to put the lastthings into his trunk and fasten it. Then she came close up tohim, in more complete contrition, penitence, and wretchedness thanhe had ever seen in life or art. Her face stiffened with terror, her eyes fixed, her whole frame rigid, only her tears flowedquietly, without a sob. She must and would have him. She seemed todraw him to herself as into a vortex: her love had become thenecessity of her life, its utterances the wild cry of despair. 

He understood it now. But he put the things into his trunk andfastened it, took a few steps about the room, as if he were alone, with such an expression of face that she herself saw that thething was impossible. 

"Do you not believe, " she said quietly, "that I would relieve youof all cares, so that you could go on with your own work? Have younot seen that I can manage your mother?" She paused a moment, thenadded: "Hellebergene--I know the place. The Dean is a relation ofmine. I have been there; that would be something that I could takecharge of; do you not think so? And the cement quarries, " sheadded; "I have a turn for business: it should be no trouble toyou. " She said this in an undertone. She had a slight lisp, whichgave her an air of helplessness. "Don't go away, to-day, at anyrate. Think it over, " she added, weeping bitterly again. 

He felt that he ought to comfort her. 

She came towards him, and throwing her arms round him, she clungto him in her despair and eagerness. "Don't go, don't go!" Shefelt that he was yielding. "Never, " she whispered, "since I havebeen a widow have I given myself to any one but you; and so judgefor yourself. " She laid her head on his shoulder and sobbedbitterly. 

"It has come upon me so suddenly, " he said; "I cannot--"

"Then take time, " she interrupted in a whisper, and took a hastykiss. "Oh, Rafael!" She twined her arms round him: her touchthrilled through him--

Some one knocked at the door: they started away from each other. It was the man who had come for the luggage. Rafael flushedcrimson. "I shall not go till to-morrow, " he said. 

When the man had left the room Angelika sprang towards Rafael. Shethanked and kissed him. Oh, how she beamed with delight andexultation! She was like a girl of twenty, or rather like a youngman, for there was something masculine in her manner as she lefthim. 

But the light and fire were no sooner withdrawn than his spiritsfell. A little later he lay at full length on the sofa, as thoughin a grave. He felt as though he could never get up from it again. What was his life now? For there is a dream in every life which isits soul, and when the dream is gone the life appears a corpse. 

This, then, was the fulfilment of his forebodings. Hither theravens had followed the wild beast which dwelt in him. It would onlonger play and amuse him, but strike its claws into him inearnest, overthrow him, and lap his fresh-spilt blood. 

But it was none the less certain that if he left her she would beruined, she and her child. Then no one would consider him as anhonourable man, least of all himself. 

During his last sojourn in France, when he could not settle downto a great work which was constantly dawning before him, he hadthought to himself--You have taken life too lightly. Nothing greatever comes to him who does so. 

Now, perhaps, when he did his duty here; took upon himself theburden of his fault towards her, himself, and others--and bore itlike a man; then perhaps he would be able to utilise all hispowers. That was what his mother had done, and she had succeeded. 

But with the thought of his mother came the thought of Helene, ofhis dream. It was flying from him like a bird of passage from theautumn. He lay there and felt as though he could never get upagain. 

From amid the turmoil of the last summer there came to hisrecollection two individuals, in whom he reposed entireconfidence: a young man and his wife. He went to see them the sameevening and laid the facts honestly before them, for now, at allevents, he was honest. The conclusive proof of being so is to beable to tell everything about oneself as he did now. 

They heard him with dismay, but their advice was remarkable. Heought to wait and see if she were enceinte. 

This aroused his spirit of contradiction. There was no doubt aboutit, for she was perfectly truthful. But she might be mistaken; sheought to make quite sure. This suggestion, too, shocked him; buthe agreed that she should come and talk things over with them. They knew her. 

She came the next day. They said to her, what they could not verywell say to Rafael, that she would ruin him. The wife especiallydid not spare her. A highly gifted young man like Rafael Kaas, with such excellent prospects in every way, must not, when littlemore than twenty, burden himself with a middle-aged wife and anumber of children. He was far from rich, he had told her sohimself; his life would be that of a beast of burden, and thattoo, before he had learned to bear the yoke. If he had to work, tofeed so many people, he might strain himself to the uttermost, hewould still remain mediocre. They would both suffer under this, bedisappointed and discontented. He must not pay so heavy a pricefor an indiscretion for which she was ten times more to blame thanhe. What did she imagine people would say? He who was so popular, so sought after. They would fall upon her like rooks at a rooks'parliament and pick her to pieces. They would, without exception, believe the worst. 

The husband asked her if she were quite sure that she wasenceinte: she ought to make quite certain. 

Angelika Nazel reddened, and answered, half scornful, halflaughing, that she ought to know. 

"Yes, " he retorted, "many people have said that--who weremistaken. If it is understood that you are to be married onaccount of your condition, and it should afterwards turn out thatyou were mistaken, what do you suppose that people will say? forof course it will get about. "

She reddened again and sprang to her feet. "They can say what theyplease. " After a pause she added: "But God knows I do not wish tomake him unhappy. "

To conceal her emotion she turned away from them, but the wifewould not give up. She suggested that Angelika should write toRafael without further delay, to set him free and let him returnhome to his mother; there they would be able to arrange matters. Angelika was so capable that she could earn a living anywhere. Rafael too ought to help her. 

"I shall write to his mother, " Angelika said. "She shall know allabout it, so that she may understand for what he is responsible. "

This they thought reasonable, and Angelika sat down and wrote. Shefrequently showed agitation, but she went on quickly, steadily, sheet after sheet. Just then came a ring--a messenger with aletter. The maid brought it in. Her mistress was about to take it, but it was not for her; it was for Angelika--they both recognisedRafael's careless handwriting. 

Angelika opened it--grew crimson; for he wrote that the result ofhis most serious considerations was, that neither she nor herchildren should be injured by him. He was an honourable man whowould bear his own responsibilities, not let others be burdened bythem. 

Angelika handed the letter to her friend, then tore up the onewhich she had been writing, and left the house. 

Her friend stood thinking to herself--The good that is in us mustgo bail for the evil, so we must rest and be satisfied. 

The discovery which she had made had often been made before, butit was none the less true. 

CHAPTER 5

The next day they were married. That night, long after his wifehad fallen into her usual healthy sleep, Rafael thoughtsorrowfully of his lost Paradise. HE could not sleep. As he laythere he seemed to look out over a meadow, which had nospringtime, and therefore no flowers. He retraced the events ofthe past day. His would be a marred life which had never known thesweet joys of courtship. 

Angelika did not share his beliefs. She was a stern realist, asneering sceptic, in the most literal sense a cynic. 

Her even breathing, her regular features, seemed to answer him. "Hey-dey, my boy, we shall be merry for a thousand years! Bettersleep now, you will need sleep if you mean to try which of us isthe stronger. "

The next day their marriage was the marvel of the town andneighbourhood. 

"Just like his mother!" people exclaimed; "what promise there wasin her! She might have chosen so as to have been now in one of thebest positions in the country--when, lo and behold! she went andmade the most idiotic marriage. The most idiotic? No, the son's ismore idiotic still. " And so on and so forth. 

Most people seem naturally impelled to exalt the hero of the hourhigher than they themselves intend, and when a reaction comes, todecry him in an equal degree. Few people see with their own eyes, and on special occasions even magnifying or diminishing glassesare called into play with most amusing results. 

"Rafael Kaas a handsome fellow?--well, yes, but too big, too fair, no repose, altogether too restless. Rich? He? He has not a stiver!The savings eaten up long ago, nothing coming in, they have beenencroaching on their capital for some time; and the beds of cementstone--who the deuce would join with him in any large undertaking?They talk about his gifts, his genius even; but IS he very highlygifted? Is it anything more than what he has acquired? The savingof motive power at the factory? Was that anything more than a mererepetition of what he had done before?--and that, of course, onlywhat he had seen elsewhere. "

Just the same with the hints which he had given. "Merely closepersonal observation; for it must be admitted that he had more ofthat than most people; but as for ingenuity! Well, he could makeout a good case for himself, but that was about the extent of hisingenuity. "

"His earlier articles, as well as those which had recentlyappeared on the use of electricity in baking and tanning--couldyou call those discoveries? Let us see what he will invent nowthat he has come home, and cannot get ideas from reading and fromseeing people. "

Rafael noticed this change--first among the ladies, who all seemedto have been suddenly blown away, with a few exceptions, who didnot respect a marriage like his, and who would not give in. 

His relations, also, held somewhat aloof. "It was not thus that heshowed himself a true Ravn. He was so in temperament anddisposition, perhaps, but it was just his defect that he was onlya half-breed. "

The change of front was complete: he noticed it on all hands. Buthe was man enough, and had sufficient obstinacy as well, to lethimself be urged on by this to hard work, and in his wife therewas still more of the same feeling. 

He had a sense of elevation in having done his duty, and as longas this tension lasted it kept him up to the mark. On the day ofhis marriage (from early in the morning until the time when theceremony took place) he employed himself in writing to his mother;a wonderful, a solemn letter in the sight of the All-Knowing, --thecry of a tortured soul in utmost peril. 

It depended on his mother whether she would receive them and lettheir life become all that was now possible. Angelika--theirbusiness, manager, housekeeper, chief. He--devoted to hisexperiments. She--the tender mother, the guide of both. 

It seemed to him that their future depended on this letter and theanswer to it, and he wrote in that spirit. Never had he so fullydepicted himself, so fully searched his own heart. 

It was the outcome of what he had lived through during these lastfew days, the mellowing influence of his struggles during thenight watches. Nothing could have been more candid. 

He was pained that he did not receive an answer at once, althoughhe realised what a blow it would be to her. He understood that, tobegin with, it would destroy all her dreams, as it had alreadydestroyed. But he relied on her optimistic nature, which he hadnever known surpassed, and on the depth of her purpose in all thatshe undertook. He knew that she drew strength and resolution fromall that was deepest in their common life. 

Therefore he gave her time, notwithstanding Angelika'srestlessness, which could hardly be controlled. She even began tosneer; but there was something holy in his anticipation: her wordsfell unheeded. 

When on the third day he had received no letter, he telegraphed, merely these words: "Mother, send me an answer. " The wires hadnever carried anything more fraught with unspoken grief. 

He could not return home. He remained alone outside the town untilthe evening, by which time the answer might well have arrived. Itwas there. 

"My beloved son, YOU are always welcome; most of all when you areunhappy!" The word YOU was underlined. He grew deadly pale, andwent slowly into his own room. There Angelika let him remain for awhile in peace, then came in and lit the lamp. He could see thatshe was much agitated, and that every now and then she cast hastyglances at him. 

"Do you know what, Rafael? you ought simply to go straight to yourmother. It is too bad, both on account of our future and hers. Weshall be ruined by gossip and trash. "

He was too unhappy to be contemptuous. She had no respect foranybody or anything, he thought; why, then, should he be angrybecause she felt none, either for his mother or for his positionin regard to her? But how vulgar Angelika seemed to him, as shebent over a troublesome lamp and let her impatience break out! Hermouth but too easily acquired a coarse expression. Her small headwould rear itself above her broad shoulders with a snake-likeexpression, and her thick wrist--

"Well, " she said, "when all is said and done, that disgustingHellebergene is not worth making a fuss over. "

Now she is annoyed with herself, he thought, and must have hersay. She will not rest until she has picked a quarrel; but sheshall not have that satisfaction. 

"After all that has been said and all that has happened there--"

But this, too, missed fire. "How could I have supposed that shecould manage my mother?" He got up and paced the room. "Is thatwhat mother felt? Yet they were such good friends. I suspectednothing then. How is it that mother's instinct is always moredelicate? have I blunted mine?"

When, a little later, Angelika came in again, he looked so unhappythat she was struck by it, and she then showed herself so kind andfertile in resource on his behalf, and there was such sunshine inher cheerfulness and flow of spirits during the evening, that heactually brightened up under it, and thought--If mother could havebrought herself to try the experiment, perhaps after all it mighthave answered. There is so much that is good and capable in thiscurious creature. 

He went to the children. From the first day he and they had takento each other. They had been unhappy in the great pension, with amother who seldom came near them or took any notice of them, except as clothes to be patched, mouths to feed, or faults to bepunished. 

Rafael had in his nature the unconventionality which delights inchildren's confidence, and he felt a desire to love and to beloved. Children are quick to feel this. 

They only wasted Angelika's time. They were in her way now morethan ever; for it may be said at once that, Rafael had becomeEVERYTHING to her. This was the fascination in her, and whateverhappened, it never lost its power. Her tenderness, her devotion, were boundless. By the aid of her personal charm, her resourcefulingenuity, she obtained every advantage for him within her range, and even beyond it. It was felt in her devotion by night and day, when anything was to be done, in an untiring zeal such as only sostrong and healthy a woman could have had in her power to render. But in words it did not show itself, hardly even in looks: except, perhaps, while she fought to win him, but never since then. 

Had she been able to adhere to one line of conduct, if only for afew weeks at a time, and let herself be guided by her never-failing love, he would, in this stimulating atmosphere, have madeof his married life what his mother, in spite of all, had made ofhers. 

Why did not this happen? Because the jealousy which she hadaroused in him and which had drawn him to her again was nowreversed. 

They were hardly married before it was she who was jealous! Was itstrange? A middle-aged woman, even though she be endowed with thestrongest personality and the widest sympathy, when she wins ayoung husband who is the fashion--wins him as Angelika won hers--begins to live in perpetual disquietude lest any one should takehim from her. Had she not taken him herself?

If we were to say that she was jealous of every human being whocame there, man or woman, old or young, beside those whom he metelsewhere, it would be an exaggeration, but this exaggerationthrows a strong light upon the state of things, which actuallyexisted. 

If he became at all interested in conversation with any one, shealways interrupted. Her face grew hard, her right foot began tomove; and if this did not suffice, she struck in with sulky orprovoking remarks, no matter who was there. 

If something were said in praise of any one, and it seemed toexcite his interest, she would pooh-pooh it, literally with a"pooh!" a shrug of the shoulders, a toss of the head, or animpatient tap of the foot. 

At first he imagined that she really knew somethingdisadvantageous about all those whom she thus disparaged, and hewas filled with admiration at her acquaintance with half Norway. He believed in her veracity as he believed in few things. Hebelieved, too, that it was unbounded like so many of herqualities. She said the most cynical things in the plainest mannerwithout apparent design. 

But little by little it dawned upon him that she said preciselywhat it pleased her to say, according to the humour that she wasin. 

One day, as they were going to table--he had come in late and washungry--he was delighted to see that there were oysters. 

"Oysters! at this time of the year, " he cried. "They must be veryexpensive. "

"Pooh! that was the old woman, you know. She persuaded me to takethem for you. I got them for next to nothing. "

"That was odd; you have been out, then, too?"

"Yes, and I saw YOU; you were walking with Emma Ravn. "

He understood at once, by the tone of her voice, that this was notpermitted, but all the same he said, "Yes; how sweet she is! sofresh and candid. "

"She! Why, she had a child before she was married. "

"Emma? Emma Ravn?"

"Yes! But I do not know who by. "

"Do you know, Angelika, I do not believe that, " he said solemnly. 

"You can do as you please about that, but she was at the pensionat the time, so you can judge for yourself if I am right. "

He could not believe that any human being could so beliethemselves. Emma's eyes, clear as water in a fountain where onecan count the pebbles at the bottom, rose to his mind, in alltheir innocence. He could not believe that such eyes could lie. Hegrew livid, he could not eat, he left the table. The world wasnothing but a delusion, the purest was impure. 

For a long time after this, whenever he met Emma or her white-haired mother, he turned aside, so as not to come face to facewith them. 

He had clung to his relations: their weak points were apparent toevery one, but their ability and honesty no less so. This onestory destroyed his confidence, impaired his self-reliance, shattered his belief, and thus made him the poorer. How could hebe fit for anything, when he so constantly allowed himself to bebefooled?

There was not one word of truth in the whole story. 

His simple confidence was held in her grasp, like a child in thetalons of an eagle; but this did not last much longer. 

Fortunately, she was without calculation or perseverance. She didnot remember one day what she had said the day before; for eachday she coolly asserted whatever was demanded by the necessity ofthe moment. He, on the contrary, had an excellent memory; and hismathematical mind ranged the evidence powerfully against her. Hergifts were more aptness and quickness than anything else, theywere without training, without cohesion, and permeated withpassion at all points. Therefore he could, at any moment, crushher defence; but whenever this happened, it was so evident thatshe had been actuated by jealousy that it flattered his vanity;which was the reason why he did not regard it seriously enough--did not pursue his advantage. Perhaps if he had done so, he wouldhave discovered more, for this jealousy was merely the form whichher uneasiness took. This uneasiness arose from several causes. 

The fact was that she had a past and she had debts which she haddenied, and now she lived in perpetual dread lest any one shouldenlighten him. If any one got on the scent, she felt sure thatthis would be used against her. It merely depended on what helearned--in other words, with whom he associated. 

She could disregard anonymous letters because he did so, but therewere plenty of disagreeable people who might make innuendoes. 

She saw that Rafael too, to some extent, avoided his countlessfriends of old days. She did not understand the reason, but it wasthis: that he, as well, felt that they knew more of her than itwas expedient for HIM to know. She saw that he made ingeniousexcuses for not being seen out with her. This, too, shemisconstrued. She did not at all understand that he, in his way, was quite as frightened as she was of what people might say. Shebelieved that he sought the society of others rather than hers. Ifnothing more came of such intercourse, stories might be told. Thiswas the reason for her slanders about almost every one he spoketo. If they had vilified her, they must be vilified in return. 

She had debts, and this could not be concealed unless sheincreased them; this she did with a boldness worthy of a bettercause. The house was kept on an extravagant scale, with anexcellent table and great hospitality. Otherwise he would not becomfortable at home, she said and believed. 

She herself vied with the most fashionably dressed ladies in thetown. Her daily struggle to maintain her hold on him demandedthis. It followed, of course, that she got everything for"nothing" or "the greatest bargain in the world. " There was alwayssome one "who almost gave it" to her. He did not know himself howmuch money he spent, perhaps, because she hunted and drove himfrom one thing to another. 

Originally he had thought of going abroad; but with a wife whoknew no foreign languages, with a large family--

Here at home, as he soon discovered, every one had lost confidencein him. He dared not take up anything important, or else he wishedto wait a little before he came to any definite determination. Inthe meantime, he did whatever came to hand, and that was oftenwork of a subordinate description. Both from weariness, and fromthe necessity to earn a living, he ended by doing only mediocrework, and let things drift. 

He always gave out that this was only "provisional. " Hisscientific gifts, his inventive genius, with so many pounds on hisback, did not rise high, but they should yet! He had youth'slavish estimate of time and strength, and therefore did not see, for a long time, that the large family, the large house wereweighing him farther and farther down. If only he could have alittle peace, he thought, he would carry out his present ideas andnew ones also. He felt such power within him. 

But peace was just what he never had. Now we come to the worst, ormore properly, to the sum of what has gone before. The ceaselessuneasiness in which Angelika lived broke out into perpetualquarrelling. For one thing, she had no self-command. A caprice, amistake, an anxiety over-ruled everything. She seized the smallestopportunities. Again--and this was a most important factor--therewas her overpowering anxiety to keep possession of him; this drewher away from what she should have paid most heed to, in order tolet him have peace. She continued her lavish housekeeping, she letthe children drift, she concentrated all her powers on him. Herjealousy, her fears, her debts, sapped his fertile mind, destroyedhis good humour, laid desolate his love of the beautiful and hiscreative power. 

He had in particular one great project, which he had often, butineffectually, attempted to mature. The effort to do so had begunseriously one day on the heights above Hellebergene, and hadcontinued the whole summer. Curiously enough, one morning, as hesat at some most wearisome work, Hellebergene and Helene, in thespring sunshine, rose before him, and with them his project, loftyand smiling, came to him again. Then he begged for a little peacein the house. 

"Let me be quiet, if only for a month, " he said. "Here is somemoney. I have got an idea; I must and will have quiet. In amonth's time I shall have got on so far that perhaps I shall beable to judge if it is worth continuing. It may be that this oneidea may entirely support us. "

This was something which she could understand, and now he was ableto be quiet. 

He had an office in the town, but sometimes took his papers homewith him in the evenings, for it often happened that somethingwould occur to him at one moment or another. She bestowed everycare on him; she even sat on the stairs while he was asleep atmidday, to prevent him from being disturbed. 

This went on for a fortnight. Then it so chanced that, when he hadgone out for a walk, she rummaged among his papers, and there, among drawings, calculations, and letters, she actually, for oncein a way, found something. It was in his handwriting and asfollows:

"More of the mother than the lover in her; more of the solicitudeof love than of its enjoyment. Rich in her affection, she wouldnot squander it in one day with you, but, mother-like, woulddistribute it throughout your life. Instead of the whirl of therapids, a placid stream. Her love was devotion, never absorption. YOU were one and SHE was one. Together we should have been morepowerful than two lovers are wont to be. "

There was more of this, but Angelika could not read further, shebecame so furious. Were these his own thoughts, or had he merelycopied them? There were no corrections, so most likely it was acopy. In any case it showed where his thoughts were. 

Rafael came quietly home, went straight to his room and lighted acandle, even before he took off his overcoat. As he stood he wrotedown a few formulae, then seized a book, sat down astride of achair, and made a rapid calculation. Just then Angelika came in, leaned forward towards him, and said in a low voice:

"You are a nice fellow! Now I know what you have in hand. Lookthere: your secret thoughts are with that beast. "

"Beast!" he repeated. His anger at being disturbed, at her havingfound this particular paper, and now the abuse from her coarselips of the most delicate creature he had ever known, and, aboveall, the absolute unexpectedness of the attack, made him lose hishead. 

"How dare you? What do you mean?"

"Don't be a fool. Do you suppose that I don't guess that that ismeant for the girl who looked after your estate in order to catchyou?"

She saw that this hit the mark, so she went still further. 

"She, the model of virtue! why, when she was a mere girl, shedisgraced herself with an old man. "

As she spoke she was seized by the throat and flung backwards onto the sofa, without the grasp being relaxed. She was breathless, she saw his face over her; deadly rage was in it. A strength, awildness of which she had no conception, gazed upon her in sensualdelight at being able to strangle her. 

After a wild struggle her arms sank down powerless, her will withthem; only her eyes remained wide open, in terror and wonderment. 

Dare he? "Yes, he dare!" Her eyes grew dim, her limbs began totremble. 

"You have taken MY apple, I tell you, " was heard in a childishvoice from the next room, a soft lisping voice. 

It came from the most peaceful innocence in the world! It savedher!

He rushed out again; but even when the rage had left him which hadseized upon him and dominated him as a rider does a horse, he wasstill not horrified at himself. His satisfaction at having atlength made his power felt was too great for that. 

But by degrees there came a revulsion. Suppose he had killed her, and had to go into penal servitude for the rest of his life forit! Had such a possibility come into his life? Might it happen inthe future? No! no! no! How strange that Angelika should havewounded him! How frightful her state of mind must be when shecould think so odiously of absolutely innocent people; and howangry she must have been to behave in such a way towards him, whomshe loved above all others, indeed, as the only one for whom shehad to live!

A long, long sum followed: his faults, her faults, and the faultsof others. He cooled down and began to feel more like himself. 

In an hour or two he was fit to go home, to find her on her bed, dissolved in tears, prepared at once to throw her arms round hisneck. 

He asked pardon a hundred times, with words, kisses, and caresses. 

But with this scene his invention had fled. The spell was broken. It never did more than flutter before him, tempting him to pursueit once more; but he turned away from the whole subject and beganto work for money again. Something offered itself just at thatmoment which Angelika had hunted up. 

Back to the unending toil again. Now at last it became anirritation to him: he chafed as the war horse chafes at being madea beast of burden. 

This made the scenes at home still worse. Since that episode theirquarrels knew no bounds. Words were no longer necessary to bringthem about: a gesture, a look, a remark of his unanswered, wasenough to arouse the most violent scenes. Hitherto they had beenrestrained by the presence of others, but now it was the samewhether they were alone or not. Very soon, as far as brutality ofexpression or the triviality of the question was concerned, he wasas bad or worse than she. 

His idle fancy and creative genius found no other vent, butoverthrew and trampled underfoot many of life's most beautifulgifts. Thus he squandered much of the happiness which such talentscan duly give. Sometimes his daily regrets and sufferings, sometimes his passionate nature, were in the ascendant, but thecause of his despair was always the same--that this could havehappened to him. Should he leave her? He would not thus escape. The state of the case had touched his conscience at first, laterhe had become fond of the children, and his mother's example saidto him, "Hold out, hold out!"

The unanimous prediction that this marriage would be dissolved asquickly as it had been made he would prove to be untrue. Besides, he knew Angelika too well now not to know that he would neverobtain a separation from her until, with the law at her back, shehad flayed him alive. He could not get free. 

From the first it had been a question of honour and duty; honourand duty on account of the child which was to come--and which didnot come. Here he had a serious grievance against her; but yet, inthe midst of the tragedy, he could not but be amused at the skillwith which she turned his own gallantries against him. At last hedared not mention the subject, for he only heard in return abouthis gay bachelor life. 

The longer this state of things lasted and the more it becameknown, the more incomprehensible it became to most people thatthey did not separate--to himself, too, at times, during sleeplessnights. But it is sometimes the case that he, who makes a thousandsmall revolts, cannot brace himself to one great one. The endlessstrife itself strengthens the bonds, in that it saps the strength. 

He deteriorated. This married life, wearing in every way, togetherwith the hard work, resulted in his not being equal to more thanjust the necessities of the day. His initiative and will becameproportionately deadened. 

A strange stagnation developed itself: he had hallucinations, visions; he saw himself in them--his father! his mother! all thepictures were of a menacing description. 

At night he dreamed the most frightful things: his unbridledfancy, his unoccupied creative power, took revenge, and all thisweakened him. He looked with admiration at his wife's robusthealth: she had the physique of a wild beast. But at times theirquarrels, their reconciliations, brought revelations with them: hecould perceive her sorrows as well. She did not complain, she didnot say a word, she could not do so; but at times she wept andgave way as only the most despairing can. Her nature was powerful, and the struggle of her love beyond belief. The beauty of thefulness of life was there, even when she was most repulsive. Thewild creature, wrestling with her destiny, often gave forth tragicgleams of light. 

One day his relation, the Government Secretary, met him. Theyusually avoided each other, but to-day he stopped. 

"Ah, Rafael, " said the dapper little man nervously, "I was comingto see you. "

"My dear fellow, what is it?"

"Ah, I see that you guess; it is a letter from your mother. "

"From my mother?"

During all the time since her telegram they had not exchanged aword. 

"A very long letter, but she makes a condition. "

"Hum, hum! a condition?"

"Yes, but do not be angry; it is not a hard one: it is only thatyou are to go away from the town, wherever you like, so long asyou can be quiet, and then you are to read it. "

"You know the contents?"

"I know the contents, I will go bail for it. "

What he meant, or why he was so perturbed by it, Rafael did notunderstand, but it infected him; if he had had the money, and ifon that day he had been disengaged, he would have gone at once. But he had not the money, not more than he wanted for the fetethat evening. He had the tickets for it in his pocket at thatmoment. He had promised Angelika that he would go there with her, and he would keep his promise, for it had been given after a greatreconciliation scene. A white silk dress had been the olive branchof these last peaceful days. She therefore looked very handsomethat evening as she walked into the great hall of the Lodge, withRafael beside her tall and stately. She was in excellent spirits. Her quiet eyes had a haughty expression as she turned her stepswith confident superiority towards those whom she wished toplease, or those whom she hoped to annoy. 

HE did not feel confident. He did not like showing himself inpublic with her, and lately it had precisely been in public placesthat she had chosen to make scenes; besides which, he felt nervousas to what his mother could wish to say to him. 

A short time before he came to the fete, he had tried, in twoquarters, to borrow money, and each time had received onlyexcuses. This had greatly mortified him. His disturbed state ofmind, as is so often the case with nervous people, made himexcited and boisterous, nay, even made him more than usuallyjovial. And as though a little of the old happiness were actuallyto come to him that evening, he met his friend and relative HansRavn, him and his young Bavarian wife, who had just come to thetown. All three were delighted to meet. 

"Do you remember, " said Hans Ravn, "how often you have lent memoney, Rafael?" and he drew him on one side. "Now I am at the topof the tree, now I am married to an heiress, and the most charminggirl too; ah, you must know her better. "

"She is pretty as well, " said Rafael. 

"And pretty as well--and good tempered; in fact, you see beforeyou the happiest man in Norway. "

Rafael's eyes filled. Ravn put his hands on to his friend'sshoulders. 

"Are you not happy, Rafael?"

"Not quite so happy as you, Hans--"

He left him to speak to some one else, then returned again. 

"You say, Hans, that I have often lent you money. "

"Are you pressed? Do you want some, Rafael? My dear fellow, howmuch?"

"Can you spare me two thousand kroner?"

"Here they are. "

"No, no; not in here, come outside. "

"Yes, let us go and have some champagne to celebrate our meeting. No, not our wives, " he added, as Rafael looked towards where theystood talking. 

"Not our wives, " laughed Rafael. He understood the intention, andnow he wished to enjoy his freedom thoroughly. They came in againmerrier and more boisterous than before. 

Rafael asked Hans Ravn's young wife to dance. Her personalattractions, natural gaiety, and especially her admiration of herhusband's relations, took him by storm. They danced twice, andlaughed and talked together afterwards. 

Later in the evening the two friends rejoined their wives, so thatthey might all sit together at supper. Even from a distance Rafaelcould see by Angelika's face that a storm was brewing. He grewangry at once. He had never been blamed more groundlessly. He wasnever to have any unalloyed pleasure, then! But he confinedhimself to whispering, "Try to behave like other people. " But thatwas exactly what she did not mean to do. He had left her alone, every one had seen it. She would have her revenge. She could notendure Hans Ravn's merriment, still less that of his wife, so shecontradicted rudely once, twice, three times, while Hans Ravn'sface grew more and more puzzled. The storm might have blown over, for Rafael parried each thrust, even turning them into jokes, sothat the party grew merrier, and no feelings were hurt; but onthis she tried fresh tactics. As has been already said, she couldmake a number of annoying gestures, signs and movements which onlyhe understood. In this way she showed him her contempt foreverything which every one, and especially he himself, said. Hecould not help looking towards her, and saw this every time he didso, until under the cover of the laughter of the others, with asmuch fervour and affection as can be put into such a word, "Youjade!" he said. 

"Jade; was ist das?" asked the bright-eyed foreigner. 

This made the whole affair supremely ridiculous. Angelika herselflaughed, and all hoped that the cloud had been finally dispersed. No!--as though Satan himself had been at table with them, shewould not give in. 

The conversation again grew lively, and when it was at its height, she pooh-poohed all their jokes so unmistakably that they werecompletely puzzled. Rafael gave her a furious look, and then shejeered at him, "You boy!" she said. After this Rafael answered herangrily, and let nothing pass without retaliation, rough, savageretaliation; he was worse than she was. 

"But God bless me!" said good-natured Hans Ravn at length, "howyou are altered, Rafael!" His genial kindly eyes gazed at him witha look which Rafael never forget. 

"Ja, ich kan es nicht mehr aushalten" said the young Fru Ravn, with tears in her eyes. She rose, her husband hurried to her, andthey left together. Rafael sat down again, with Angelika. Thosenear them looked towards them and whispered together. Angry andashamed, he looked across at Angelika, who laughed. Everythingseemed to turn red before his eyes--he rose; he had a wild desireto kill her there, before every one. Yes! the temptationoverpowered him to such an extent that he thought that people mustnotice it. 

"Are you not well, Kaas?" he heard some one beside him say. 

He could not remember afterwards what he answered, or how he gotaway; but still, in the street, he dwelt with ecstasy on thethought of killing her, of again seeing her face turn black, herarms fall powerless, her eyes open wide with terror; for that waswhat would happen some day. He should end his life in a felon'scell. That was as certainly a part of his destiny as had been thepossession of talents which he had allowed to become useless. 

A quarter of an hour later he was at the observatory: he scannedthe heavens, but no stars were visible. He felt that he wasperspiring, that his clothes clung to him, yet he was ice-cold. That is the future that awaits you, he thought; it runs ice-coldthrough your limbs. 

Then it was that a new and, until then, unused power, whichunderlay all else, broke forth and took the command. 

"You shall never return home to her, that is all past now, boy; Iwill not permit it any longer. "

What was it? What voice was that? It really sounded as thoughoutside himself. Was it his father's? It was a man's voice. Itmade him clear and calm. He turned round, he went straight to thenearest hotel, without further thought, without anxiety. Somethingnew was about to begin. 

He slept for three hours undisturbed by dreams; it was the firstnight for a long time that he had done so. 

The following morning he sat in the little pavilion at the stationat Eidsvold with his mother's packet of letters laid open beforehim. It consisted of a quantity of papers which he had readthrough. 

The expanse of Lake Mjosen lay cold and grey beneath the autumnmist, which still shrouded the hillsides. The sound of hammersfrom the workshops to the right mingled with the rumble of wheelson the bridge; the whistle of an engine, the rattle of crockeryfrom the restaurant; sights and sounds seethed round him likewater boiling round an egg. 

As soon as his mother had felt sure that Angelika was not reallyenceinte she had busied herself in collecting all the informationabout her which it was possible to obtain. 

By the untiring efforts of her ubiquitous relations she hadsucceeded to such an extent and in such detail as no examiningmagistrate could have accomplished. And there now lay before himletters, explanations, evidence, which the deponent was ready toswear to, besides letters from Angelika herself: imprudent letterswhich this impulsive creature could perpetrate in the midst of herschemes; or deeply calculated letters, which directly contradictedothers which had been written at a different period, based ondifferent calculations. These documents were only theaccompaniment of a clear summing-up by his mother. It wastherefore she who had guided the investigations of the others andmade a digest of their discoveries. With mathematical precisionwas here laid down both what was certain and what, though notcertain, was probable. No comment was added, not a word addressedto himself. 

That portion of the disclosures which related to Angelika's pastdoes not concern us. That which had reference to her relationswith Rafael began by proving that the anonymous letters, which hadbeen the means of preventing his engagement with Helene, had beenwritten by Angelika. This revelation and that which preceded it, give an idea of the overwhelming humiliation under which Rafaelnow suffered. What was he that he could be duped and mastered likea captured animal; that what was best and what was worst in himcould lead him so far astray? Like a weak fool he was swept along;he had neither seen nor heard nor thought before he was draggedaway from everything that was his or that was dear to him. 

As he sat there, the perspiration poured from him as it had donethe night before, and again he felt a deadly chill. He thereforewent up to his room with the papers, which he locked up in histrunk, and then set off at a run along the road. The passers-byturned to stare after the tall fellow. 

As he ran he repeated to himself, "Who are you, my lad? who areyou?" Then he asked the hills the same question, and then thetrees as well. He even asked the fog, which was now rolling off, "Who am I? can you answer me that?"

The close-cropped half-withered turf mocked him--the clearedpotato patches, the bare fields, the fallen leaves. 

"That which you are you will never be; that which you can you willnever do; that which you ought to become you will never attain to!As you, so your mother before you. She turned aside--and yourfather too--into absolute folly; perhaps their fathers beforethem! This is a branch of a great family who never attained towhat they were intended for. "

"Something different has misled each one of us, but we have allbeen misled. Why is that so? We have greater aims than manyothers, but the others drove along the beaten highway rightthrough the gates of Fortune's house. We stray away from thehighway and into the wood. See! am I not there myself now? Awayfrom the highway and into the wood, as though I were led by aninward law. Into the wood. " He looked round among the mountain-ashes, the birches, and other leafy trees in autumn tints. Theystood all round, dripping, as though they wept for his sorrow. "Yes, yes; they will see me hang here, like Absalom by his longhair. " He had not recalled this old picture a moment before hestopped, as though seized by a strong hand. 

He must not fly from this, but try to fathom it. The more hethought of it, the clearer it became: ABSALOM'S HISTORY WAS HISOWN. He began with rebellion. Naturally rebellion is the firststep in a course which leads one from the highway--leads topassion and its consequences. That was clear enough. 

Thus passion overpowered strength of purpose; thus chancecircumstances sapped the foundations--But David rebelled as well. Why, then, was not David hung up by his hair? It was quite as longas Absalom's. Yes, David was within an ace of it, right up to hisold age. But the innate strength in David was too great, hisenergy was always too powerful: it conquered the powers ofrebellion. They could not drag him far away into passionatewanderings; they remained only holiday flights in his life andadded poetry to it. They did not move his strength of purpose. Ah, ha! It was so strong in David that he absorbed them and fed onthem; and yet he was within an ace--very often. See! That is whatI, miserable contemptible wretch, cannot do. So I must hang! Verysoon the man with the spear will be after me. 

Rafael now set off running; probably he wished to escape the manwith the spear. He now entered the thickest part of the wood, anarrow valley between two high hills which overshadowed it. Oh, how thirsty he was, so fearfully thirsty! He stood still andwondered whether he could get anything to drink. Yes, he couldhear the murmur of a brook. He ran farther down towards it. Closeby was an opening in the wood, and as he went towards the streamhe was arrested by something there: the sun had burst forth andlighted up the tree-tops, throwing deep shadows below. Did he seeanything? Yes; it seemed to him that he saw himself, notabsolutely in the opening, but to one side, in the shadow, under atree; he hung there by his hair. He hung there and swung, a man, but in the velvet jacket of his childhood and the tight-fittingtrousers: he swung suspended by his tangled red hair. And fartheraway he distinctly saw another figure: it was his mother, stiffand stately, who was turning round as if to the sound of music. And, God preserve him! still farther away, broad and heavy, hunghis father, by the few thin hairs on his neck, with wretcheddistorted face as on his death-bed. In other respects those twowere not great sinners. They were old; but his sins were great, for he was young, and therefore nothing had ever prospered withhim, not even in his childhood. There had always been somethingwhich had caused him to be misunderstood or which had frightenedhim or made him constantly constrained and uncertain of himself. Never had he been able to keep to the main point, and thus to bein quiet natural peace. With only one exception--his meeting withHelene. 

It seemed to him that he was sitting in the boat with her out inthe bay. The sky was bright, there was melody in the woods. Now hewas up on the hill with her, among the saplings, and she wasexplaining to him that it depended on her care whether they throveor not. 

He went to the brook to drink; he lay down over the water. He wasthus able to see his own face. How could that happen? Why, therewas sunshine overhead. He was able to see his own face. Greatheavens! how like his father he had become. In the last year hehad grown very like his father--people had said so. He wellremembered his mother's manner when she noticed it. But, good God!were those grey hairs? Yes, in quantities, so that his hair was nolonger red but grey. No one had told him of it. Had he advanced sofar, been so little prepared for it, that Hans Ravn's remark, "Howyou are altered, Rafael!" had frightened him?

He had certainly given up observing himself, in this coarse lifeof quarrels. In it, certainly, neither words nor deeds wereweighed, and hence this hunted feeling. It was only natural thathe had ceased to observe. If the brook had been a little deeper, he would have let himself be engulfed in it. He got up, and wenton again, quicker and quicker: sometimes he saw one person, sometimes another, hanging in the woods. 

He dare not turn round. Was it so very wonderful that othersbesides himself and his family had turned from the beaten track, and peopled the byways and the boughs in the wood? He had beenunjust towards himself and his parents; they were not alone, theywere in only too large a company. What will unjust people say, butthat the very thing which requires strength does not receive it, but half of it comes to nothing, more than half of the powers arewasted. Here, in these strips of woodland which run up the hillsside by side, like organ-pipes, Henrik Vergeland had also roamed:within an ace, with him too, within an ace! Wonderful how theravens gather together here, where so many people are hanging. Ha!ha! He must write this to his mother! It was something to writeabout to her, who had left him, who deserted him when he was themost unhappy, because all that she cared for was to keep hersacred person inviolate, to maintain her obstinate opinion, togratify her pique--Oh! what long hair!--How fast his mother washeld! She had not cut her hair enough then. But now she shouldhave her deserts. Everything from as far back as he could remembershould be recalled, for once in a way he would show her herself;now he had both the power and the right. His powers of discoveryhad been long hidden under the suffocating sawdust of the dailyand nightly sawing; but now it was awake, and his mother shouldfeel it. 

People noticed the tall man break out of the wood, jump overhedges and ditches, and make his way straight up the hill. At thevery top he would write to his mother!--

He did not return to the hotel till dark. He was wet, dirty, andfrightfully exhausted. He was as hungry as a wolf, he said, but hehardly ate anything; on the other hand, he was consumed withthirst. On leaving the table he said that he wished to stay therea few days to sleep. They thought that he was joking, but he sleptuninterruptedly until the afternoon of the next day. He was thenawakened, ate a little and drank a great deal, for he hadperspired profusely; after which he fell asleep again. He passedthe next twenty-four hours in much the same way. 

When he awoke the following morning he found himself alone. 

Had not a doctor been there, and had he not said that it was agood thing for him to sleep? It seemed to him that he had heard abuzz of voices; but he was sure that he was well now, onlyfuriously hungry and thirsty, and when he raised himself he feltgiddy. But that passed off by degrees, when he had eaten some ofthe food which had been left there. He drank out of the water-jug--the carafe was empty--and walked once or twice up and down beforethe open window. It was decidedly cold, so he shut it. Just thenhe remembered that he had written a frightful letter to hismother!

How long ago was it? Had he not slept a long time? Had he notturned grey? He went to the looking-glass, but forgot the greyhair at the sight of himself. He was thin, lank, and dirty. --Theletter! the letter! It will kill my mother! There had already beenmisfortunes enough, more must not follow. 

He dressed himself quickly, as if by hurrying he could overtakethe letter. He looked at the clock--it had stopped. Suppose thetrain were in! He must go by it, and from the train straight tothe steamer, and home, home to Hellebergene! But he must send atelegram to his mother at once. He wrote it--"Never mind theletter, mother. I am coming this evening and will never leave youagain. "

So now he had only to put on a clean collar, now his watch--itcertainly was morning--now to pack, go down and pay the bill, havesomething to eat, take his ticket, send the telegram; but first--no, it must all be done together, for the train WAS there; it hadonly a few minutes more to wait; he could only just catch it. Thetelegram was given to some one else to send off. 

But he had hardly got into the carriage, where he was alone, thanthe thought of the letter tortured him, till he could not sitstill. This dreadful analysis of his mother, strophe afterstrophe, it rose before him, it again drove him into the state ofmind in which he had been among the hills and woods of Eidsvold. Beyond the tunnel the character of the scenery was the same. --GoodGod! that dreadful letter was never absent from his thoughts, otherwise he would not suffer so terribly. What right had he toreproach his mother, or any one, because a mere chance should havebecome of importance in their lives?

Would the telegram arrive in time to save her from despair, andyet not frighten her from home because he was coming? To thinkthat he could write in such a way to her, who had but lived tocollect the information which would free him! His ingratitude mustappear too monstrous to her. The extreme reserve which she wasunable to break through might well lead to catastrophes. Whatmight not she have determined on when she received this violentattack by way of thanks? Perhaps she would think that life was nolonger worth living, she who thought it so easy to die. Heshuddered. 

But she will do nothing hastily, she will weigh everything first. Her roots go deep. When she appears to have acted on impulse, itis because she has had previous knowledge. But she has no previousknowledge here; surely here she will deliberate. 

He pictured her as, wrapped in her shawl, she wandered about indire distress--or with intent gaze reviewing her life and his own, until both appeared to her to have been hopelessly wasted--orpondering where she could best hide herself so that she shouldsuffer no more. 

How he loved her! All that had happened had drawn a veil over hiseyes, which was now removed. 

 Now he was on board the steamer which was bearing him home. Theweather had become mild and summerlike; it had been raining, buttowards evening it began to clear. He would get to Hellebergene infine weather, and by moonlight. It grew colder; he spoke to noone, nor had he eyes for anything about him. 

The image of his mother, wrapped in her long shawl--that was allthe company he had. Only his mother! No one but his mother!Suppose the telegram had but frightened her the more--that to seeHIM now appeared the worst that could happen. To read such acrushing doom for her whole life, and that from him! She was notso constituted that it could be cancelled by his askingforgiveness and returning to her. On the contrary, it wouldprecipitate the worst, it must do so. 

The violent perspiration began again; he had to put on more wraps. His terror took possession of him: he was forced to contemplatethe most awful possibilities--to picture to himself what death hismother would choose!

He sprang to his feet and paced up and down. He longed to throwhimself into somebody's arms, to cry aloud. But he knew well thathe must not let such words escape him. --He HAD to picture her asshe handled the guns, until she relinquished the idea of using anyof them. Then he imagined her recalling the deepest hiding-placesin the woods--where were they all?

HE recalled them, one after another. No, not in any of THOSE, forshe wished to hide herself where she would never be found! Therewas the cement-bed; it went sheer down there, and the water wasdeep!--He clung to the rigging to prevent himself from falling. Heprayed to be released from these terrors. But he saw her floatingthere, rocked by the rippling water. Was it the face which wasuppermost, or was it the body, which for a while floated higherthan the face?

His thoughts were partially diverted from this by people coming upto ask him if he were ill. He got something warm and strong todrink, and now the steamer approached the part of the coast withwhich he was familiar. They passed the opening into Hellebergene, for one has to go first to the town, and thence in a boat. It nowbecame the question, whether a boat had been sent for him. In thatcase his mother was alive, and would welcome him. But if there wasno boat, then a message from the gulf had been sent instead!

And there was no boat!--

For a moment his senses failed him; only confused sounds fell onhis ear. But then he seemed to emerge from a dark passage. He mustget to Hellebergene! He must see what had happened; be would goand search!

By this time it was growing dark. He went on shore and lookedround for a boat as though half asleep. He could hardly speak, buthe did not give in till he got the men together and hired theboat. He took the helm himself, and bade them row with all theirmight. He knew every peak in the grey twilight. They might dependon him, and row on without looking round. Soon they had passed thehigh land and were in among the islands. This time they did notcome out to meet him; they all seemed gathered there to repel him. No boat had been sent; there was, therefore, nothing more for himto do here. No boat had been sent, because he had forfeited hisplace here. Like savage beasts, with bristles erect, the peaks andislands arrayed themselves against him. "Row on, my lads, " hecried, for now arose again in him that dormant power which onlymanifested itself in his utmost need. 

"How is it with you, my boy? I am growing weary. Courage, now, andforward!"

Again that voice outside himself--a man's voice. Was it hisfather's?

Whether or not it were his father's voice, here before hisfather's home he would struggle against Fate. 

In man's direst necessity, what he has failed in and what he cando seem to encounter each other. And thus, just as the boat hadcleared the point and the islands and was turning into the bay, heraised himself to his full height, and the boatmen looked at himin astonishment. He still grasped the rudder-lines, and looked asthough he were about to meet an enemy. Or did he hear anything?was it the sound of oars?

Yes, they heard them now as well. From the strait near the inlet aboat was approaching them. She loomed large on the smooth surfaceof the water and shot swiftly along. 

"Is that a boat from Hellebergene?" shouted Rafael. His voiceshook. 

"Yes, " came a voice out of the darkness, and he recognised thebailiff's voice. "Is it Rafael?"

"Yes. Why did you not come before?"

"The telegram has only just arrived. "

He sat down. He did not speak. He became suddenly incapable ofuttering a word. 

The other boat turned and followed them. Rafael nearly ran hisboat on shore; he forgot that he was steering. Very soon theycleared the narrow passage which led into the inner bay, androunded the last headland, and there!--there lay Hellebergenebefore them in a blaze of light! From cellar to attic, in everysingle window, it glowed, it streamed with light, and at thatmoment another light blazed out from the cairn on the hill-top. 

It was thus that his mother greeted him. He sobbed; and theboatmen heard him, and at the same time noticed that it had grownsuddenly light. They turned round, and were so engrossed in thespectacle that they forgot to row. 

"Come! you must let me get on, " was all that he could manage tosay. 

His sufferings were forgotten as he leapt from the boat. Nor didit disturb him that he did not meet his mother at the landing-place, or near the house, nor see her on the terrace. He simplyrushed up the stairs and opened the door. 

The candles in the windows gave but little light within. Indeed, something had been put in the windows for them to stand on, sothat the interior was half in shadow. But he had come in from thesemi-darkness. He looked round for her, but he heard some onecrying at the other end of the room. There she sat, crouched inthe farthest corner of the sofa, with her feet drawn up under her, as in old days when she was frightened. She did not stretch outher arms; she remained huddled together. But he bent over her, knelt down, laid his face on hers, wept with her. She had grownfragile, thin, haggard, ah! as though she could be blown away. Shelet him take her in his arms like a child and clasp her to hisbreast; let him caress and kiss her. Ah, how ethereal she hadbecome! And those eyes, which at last he saw, now looked tearfullyout from their large orbits, but more innocently than a bird fromits nest. Over her broad forehead she had wound a large silkhandkerchief in turban fashion. It hung down behind. She wished toconceal the thinness of her hair. He smiled to recognise her againin this. More spiritualised, more ethereal in her beauty, herinnermost aspirations shone forth without effort. Her thin handscaressed his hair, and now she gazed into his eyes. 

"Rafael, my Rafael!" She twined her arms round him and murmuredwelcome. But soon she raised her head and resumed a sittingposture. She wished to speak. He was beforehand with her. 

"Forgive the letter, " he whispered with beseeching eyes and voice, and hands upraised. 

"I saw the distress of your soul, " was the whispered answer, forit could not be spoken aloud. "And there was nothing to forgive, "she added. She had laid her face against his again. "And it wasquite true, Rafael, " she murmured. 

She must have passed through terrible days and nights here, hethought, before she could say that. 

"Mother, mother! what a fearful time!"

Her little hand sought his: it was cold; it lay in his like an eggin a deserted nest. He warmed it and took the other as well. 

"Was not the illumination splendid?" she said. And now her voicewas like a child's. 

He moved the screen which obstructed the light: he must see herbetter. He thought, when he saw the look of happiness in her face, if life looks so beautiful to her still, we shall have a long timetogether. 

"If you had told me all that about Absalom, the picture which youmade when you were told the story of David, Rafael; if you hadonly told me that before!" She paused, and her lips quivered. 

"How could I tell it to you, mother, when I did not understand itmyself?"

"The illumination--that must signify that I, too, understand. Itought to light you forward; do you not think so?"

A PAINFUL MEMORY FROM CHILDHOOD

I must have been somewhere about seven years old, when one Sundayafternoon a rumour reached the parsonage that, on that same day, two men, rowing past the Buggestrand in Eidsfjord, had discovereda woman who had fallen over a cliff, and had remained half lying, half hanging, close to the water's edge. 

Before moving her, they tried to find out from her who had thrownher over. 

It was thirty-five miles by water to the doctor's, and then anorder for admission to the hospital had also to be procured. Shehad lain twenty-four hours before help reached her, and shortlyafterwards she died. Before she breathed her last, she said it wasPeer Hagbo who had done it. "But, " she added, "they mustn't do himany harm. "

Everybody knew that there had been an attachment between the girl, who was in service at Hagbo's, and the son of the house, and theshrewd ones instantly guessed why he wanted to get her out of theway. 

I remember clearly the arrival of the news. It was, as I havesaid, on a Sunday afternoon, her death having occurred on themorning of the same day. 

It was in the very middle of summer, when the whole place wasflooded with sunshine and gladness. I remember how the lightfaded, faces turned to stone, the fjord grew dim, and village andforest shrank away into shadow. I remember that even the next dayI felt as though a blow had been dealt to ordinary existence. Iknew that I need not go to school. Men knocked off work, leavingeverything just as it was, and sat down with idle hands. The womenespecially were paralysed: it was evident they felt themselvesthreatened, they even said as much. When strangers came to theparsonage their bearing and expression showed that the murder layheavy on their minds, and they read the same story in us. We tookeach other's hands with a sense of remoteness. The murder was theonly thing that was present with us. Whatever we talked of weseemed to hear of the murder in voice and word. The lastconsciousness at night and the first in the morning was thateverything was unsettled, and that the joy of life was suddenlyarrested, like the hands on a dial at a certain hour. 

But by degrees the murder fell into its proper place among otherinterests; curiosity and gossip had made it commonplace. It wastaken up, turned over, considered, picked at and pulled about, till it became simply "the last new thing. " Soon we knew everydetail of the relation between the murdered and the murderer. Weknew who it was that Peer's mother had wanted him to marry; weknew the Hagbo family in and out, and their history forgenerations past. 

When the magistrate came to the parsonage to institute thepreliminary inquiry, the murder was merely an inexhaustible themeof conversation. But the next day when the bailiff and some othermen appeared with the murderer, a new feeling took possession ofme, a feeling of which I could not have imagined myself capable--an overpowering compassion. A young good-looking lad, well grown, slightly built, rather small than otherwise, with dark not verythick hair, with appealing eyes which were now downcast, with aclear voice, and about his whole personality a certain charm, almost refinement; a creature to associate with life, not death, with gladness, with gaiety. I was more sorry for him than I cansay. The bailiff and the other people spoke kindly to him too, sothey must have felt the same. Only the peppery little clerk cameout with some hard words, but the accused stood cap in hand andmade no answer. 

He paced up and down the yard in his shirt sleeves--the day wasvery warm--with a flat cloth cap over his close-cut hair, and hishands in his trousers pockets, or toying restlessly with a pieceof straw. The parsonage dog had found companions, and the youthfollowed the dog's frolic with his eyes, and gazed at the chickensand at us children as though he longed to be one of us. The girl'swords, "But don't do him any harm, " rang in my ears unceasingly--whether he walked about or stood still or sat down. I knew that hewould certainly be beheaded, and, believing that it must be soon, I was filled with horror at the thought of his saying to himself, In a month I shall die--and then in a week--in a day--an hour. .. It must be utterly unendurable. I slipped behind him to see hisneck, and just at that moment he lifted his hand up to it, alittle brown hand; and I could not get rid of the thought thatperhaps his fingers would come in the way when the axe wasfalling. 

He and the warders were asked to come in and dine. I felt I mustsee if it were really possible for him to eat. Yes, he ate andchatted just like the rest, and for a time I forgot my terror. Butno sooner was I outside again and alone than I fell to thinking ofit with might and main, and it seemed to me very hard that herwords, "But you mustn't do him any harm, " should be so utterlydisregarded. I felt I must go in and say as much to father. Buthe, slow and serious, and the clerk, little and dapper, werewalking up and down the room deep in conversation, far, far aboveall my misery. I slipped out again, and stroked the coat whichPeer had taken off. 

The inquiry was held in my schoolroom. My master acted assecretary to the court, and I got leave to sit there and listen. For the matter of that, the clerk spoke in so loud a voice that itcould be heard through the open window by every one in the place. The unfortunate youth was called upon to account for the entireday on which the murder had been committed--for every hour of thatSunday. He denied that he had killed her--denied it with theutmost emphasis: "It was not he who had done it. " The magistrate'sexamination was both acutely and kindly conducted; Peer was movedto tears, but no confession could be drawn from him. 

"This will be a long business, madam, " said the magistrate to mymother when the first day's inquiry was over. But later in theevening Peer's sister came to the parsonage and remained with himall through the night. They were heard whispering and cryingunceasingly. In the morning Peer was pale and silent; before thecourt he took all the blame upon himself. 

The way it had happened, he explained, was that he had been herlover, and that his mother had strongly disapproved of theconnection. So one Sunday as the girl, prayer-book in hand, wasgoing to church, he met her in the wood. They sat down, and heasked if she intended to declare him the father of the child shewas about to bear; for it was in this time of sore necessity thatshe was going to seek consolation in the church. She replied thatshe could accuse no one else. He spoke of the shame it would bringon him, and how annoyed his mother already was. Yes, yes, she knewthat too well. His mother was very angry with her; and she thoughtit strange of Peer that he didn't stand up for her; he knew bestwhose fault it was that all this had happened. But Peer hintedthat she had been compliant to others as well as to himself, andtherefore he would not submit to being given out as the child'sfather. He tried to make her angry, but did not succeed, she wasso gentle. He had an axe lying concealed in the heather near wherehe sat. He took it and struck her on the head from behind. She didnot lose consciousness at once, but tried to defend herself whileshe begged for her life. He could give no clear account of whathappened afterwards. It seemed almost as though he himself hadlost consciousness. As to the other events, he accepted theaccount of them which had been given in the evidence against him. 

His sister waited at the parsonage until he came from theexamination, worn out and with eyes red with weeping. Once morethey went aside and whispered. I remember nothing more of her thanthat she held her head down and wept a great deal. 

 It was in the winter that he was to be executed. The announcementwas made at such short notice that every one in the house had tobestir himself--father was to deliver an exhortation at the placeof execution, and the Dean, whose parishioner the condemned manwas, together with the bailiff, had arranged to come to us the daybefore. 

Peer and his warders and a friend, his instructor during the timeof his imprisonment, schoolmaster Jakobsen, were to sleep down inthe schoolhouse, which was part of the farm property belonging tothe old parsonage. Meals were to be carried from our house to theprisoner and Jakobsen. 

I remember that they came in the morning in two boat-loads fromMolde: the Dean, the bailiff, the military escort, and thecondemned man. But I had to sit in the old schoolhouse, and noteven later in the day was I allowed to go down to where they were. 

This prohibition made the whole proceeding the more mysterious. Itgrew dark early. The sea ran black against a whitish and in someplaces bare-swept beach. The ragged clouds chased each otheracross the sky. We were afraid a storm was coming on. Then one ofthe parsonage chimneys caught on fire, and most of the soldierscame rushing up to offer help. The great fire-ladder was broughtfrom under the storehouse. It was unusually heavy and clumsy, soit was difficult to get it raised, till father broke into themidst of the crowd, ordered them all to stand back, and set it upby himself. This is still remembered in the parish; and also thatthe bailiff, an active little fellow, took a bucket in each handand went up the ladder till he reached the turf roof. The blackfjord, the hurrying clouds, the menace of the coming day, theblaze of the fire, the bustle and din. .. And then the silenceafterwards! People whispered as they moved about the rooms and outin the yard, whence they looked down upon the schoolhouse-prisonwhere the steady light burned. 

Schoolmaster Jacobsen was sitting there now with his friend. Theywere singing and praying together, I heard from those who had beendown in that direction. Peer's family came in the evening in aboat, went up to see him, and took leave of him. I heard howdauntless he was in his confidence that the next day he would bewith God, and how beautifully he talked to his people, andespecially how he begged them to take an affectionate greeting tohis mother, and be good to her as long as she lived. Some said shehad come in the boat with the rest, but would not go up to seehim. That was not true, any more than that some of them were atthe execution the next day, which was also reported. 

I wakened the next morning under a weight of apprehension. Theweather had changed and was fair now, but it felt oppressivenevertheless. No one spoke loud, and people said as little aspossible. I was to be allowed to go with the rest and look on; soI made haste to find my tutor, whom I had been told not to leave. The two clergymen came out in their cassocks. We went down to thelanding-place and rowed the first part of the way. The condemnedman and his escort had gone on before, and waited at the placewhere we disembarked, in order to walk the latter part of the wayto the place of execution, a kilometer or so distant. Theexecution had to take place at a cross-roads, and there was onlyone in the neighbourhood--namely, at Ejdsvaag, nearly seven milesaway from where the murder was committed. The bailiff headed theprocession, then came the soldiers, then the condemned man, withthe Dean on one side and my father on the other, then Jacobsen andmy tutor, with me between them, then some more people, followed bymore soldiers. We walked cautiously along the slippery road. Theclergyman talked constantly to the condemned man, who was now verypale. His eyes had grown gentle and weary and he said very little. My mother, who had been very kind to him, and whom he had thankedfor all she had done, had sent him a bottle of wine to keep up hisstrength. The first time that my tutor offered him some, he lookedat the clergyman as though asking if there were anything sinful inaccepting it. My father quoted St. Paul's advice to Timothy, andinstantly he drank off a long draught. 

By the wayside stood people curious to see him, and they joinedthe procession as it passed along. Among them were some of hiscomrades, to whom he sorrowfully nodded. Once or twice he liftedhis cap, the same flat one I had seen him in the first time. Itwas evident that his comrades had a regard for him; and I saw, too, some young women who were crying, and made no attempt toconceal it. He walked along with his hands clasped at his breast, probably praying. 

We were all startled by the captain's loud and commonplace word ofcommand, "Attention!" as we reached the appointed place. A body ofsoldiers stood drawn up in a hollow square, which closed in afteradmitting the bailiff, the clergyman, the condemned man, and a fewbesides, among whom was myself. A great silent crowd stood round, and over their heads one saw the mounted figure of the sheriff inhis cocked hat. When the soldiers who came with us, having carriedout various sharp words of command, had taken their places in thesquare, the further proceedings began by the sheriff's readingaloud the death sentence and the royal order for the execution. 

The sheriff stationed himself directly in front of the place wheresome planed boards were laid over the grave. At one end of itstood the block. On the other side of the grave a platform hadbeen erected, from which the Dean was to speak. Peer Hagbo kneltbelow on the step, with his face buried in his hands, close to thefeet of his spiritual adviser. The Dean was of Danish birth, oneof the many who, at the time of the separation, had chosen to maketheir home in Norway. His addresses were beautiful to read, butone couldn't always hear him, and least of all when he was moved, as was frequently the case. He shouted the first words very loud;then his head sank down between his shoulders, and he shook itwithout a pause while he closed his eyes and uttered somesmothered sounds, catching his breath between them. The points ofhis tall shirt-collar, which reached to the middle of his ears (Ihave never since seen the like), stuck up on each side of the barecropped head with the two double chins underneath, and the wholewas framed between his shoulders, which, by long practice, hecould raise much higher than other men. Those who did not knowhim--for to know him was to love him--could hardly keep fromlaughing. His speech was neither heard nor understood, but it wasshort. His emotion forced him to break it off suddenly. One thingalone we all understood: that he loved the pale young man whom hehad prepared for death, and that he wished that all of us might goto our God as happy and confident as he who was to die to-day. When he stepped down they embraced each other for the last time. Peer gave his hand to my father and to a number besides, and thenplaced himself by his friend Jakobsen. The latter knew what thismeant. He took off a kerchief and bound Peer's eyes, while we sawhim whisper something to him and receive a whispered answer. Thena man came forward to bind Peer's hands behind his back, but hebegged to be left free, and his prayer was granted. Then Jakobsentook him by the hand and led him forward. At the place where Peerwas to kneel Jakobsen stopped short, and Peer slowly bent hisknees. Jakobsen bent Peer's head down until it rested on theblock; then he drew back and folded his hands. All this I saw, andalso that a tall man came and took hold of Peer's neck, while asmaller man drew forth from a couple of folded towels a shiningaxe with a remarkably broad thin blade. It was then I turned away. I heard the captain's horrible "Present arms"; I heard some onepraying "Our Father"--perhaps it was Peer himself--then a blowthat sounded exactly as if it went into a great cabbage. At once Ilooked round again, and saw one leg kicking out, and a yard or twobeyond the body lay the head, the mouth gasping and gasping as iffor air. 

The executioner's assistant sprang forward and took hold of it bythe ends of the handkerchief that had bandaged the eyes, and threwit into the coffin beside the body, where it fell with a dullsound. The boards were laid over the coffined remains, and thewhole hastily lifted up and lowered into the grave. 

Then my father got up on the platform. Every one could understandwhat HE said, and his powerful voice was heard to such a distancethat even now it is remembered in the district. Following up thethunderous admonition of the execution itself, he warned the youngagainst the vices which prevailed in the parish--againstdrunkenness, fighting, unchastity, and other misconduct. They musthave liked the discourse very much, for it was stolen out of thepocket of his gown on the way home. 

As for me, I left the place as sick at heart, as overwhelmed withhorror, as if it were my turn to be executed next. Afterwards Icompared notes with many others, who owned to exactly the samefeeling. Father and the Dean dined at the captain's with the otherofficials; but they separated and went home directly after dinner.