The Augustan Reprint Society, Series Four: No. 1, May, 1948

THE THEATRE

SIR JOHN FALSTAFFE

1720

With an Introduction by John Loftis

GENERAL EDITORS

RICHARD C. BOYS, University of MichiganEDWARD NILES HOOKER, University of California, Los AngelesH. T. SWEDENBERG, JR. , University of California, Los Angeles

ASSISTANT EDITOR

W. EARL BRITTON, University of Michigan

ADVISORY EDITORS

EMMETT L. AVERY, State College of WashingtonBENJAMIN BOYCE, University of NebraskaLOUIS I. BREDVOLD, University of MichiganCLEANTH BROOKS, Yale UniversityJAMES L. CLIFFORD, Columbia UniversityARTHUR FRIEDMAN, University of ChicagoSAMUEL H. MONK, University of MinnesotaERNEST MOSSNER, University of TexasJAMES SUTHERLAND, Queen Mary College, London

Lithoprinted from copy supplied by author

by

Edwards Brothers, Inc. 

Ann Arbor, Michigan, U. S. A. 

1948

INTRODUCTION

_The Theatre_, by "Sir John Falstaffe", is according to its author acontinuation of Richard Steele's periodical of the same name. Shortly afterSteele brought his paper to a close on April 5, 1720, the anonymous authorwho called himself "Falstaffe" appropriated his title; or if we preferFalstaffe's own account of the matter, he was bequeathed the title upon thedecease of Steele's "Sir John Edgar". At any rate, the new series of_Theatres_ was begun on April 9, 1720, and continued to appear twice a weekfor eleven numbers until May 14. On Tuesdays and Saturdays Falstaffeentertained the town with a pleasant essay in the tradition established by_The Tatler_. 

But the paper of April 9, the first of the new _Theatres_, was onlynominally the first of a series; Falstaffe, who numbered the paper"sixteen", had already written fifteen papers called _The Anti-Theatre_ inanswer to Steele's _Theatre_. The demise of Steele's periodical merelyafforded him an opportunity of changing his title; his naturally becameinappropriate when Steele's paper was discontinued and the shorter titlewas probably thought to be more attractive to readers. Falstaffe made noattempt to pass his papers off as the work of his famous rival, to gainpopularity for them through the reputation of Steele. Indeed, theantagonism which existed between the two men would have made such an act ofdeception an unlikely one. 

Steele's _The Theatre_, his last periodical, had been written for acontroversial purpose; by his own admission he wrote it to arouse supportfor himself in a dispute in which he was engaged with the Lord Chamberlain, the Duke of Newcastle. Steele, who by the authority of a Royal Patent wasgovernor of the Company of Comedians acting in Drury Lane, insisted thathis authority in the theatre was not respected by the Lord Chamberlain, theofficer of the Royal Household traditionally charged with supervision oftheatrical matters. Newcastle intervened in the internal affairs of DruryLane and, when Steele protested, expelled him from the theatre. Steelecould do nothing but submit, though he retaliated with a series of bitterattacks on the Duke in _The Theatre_. 

Newcastle found defenders, of whom one of the strongest was Falstaffe, whowrote in direct opposition to Steele's "Sir John Edgar", openly attemptingto provoke that knight to a journalistic contest. But Edgar gave scantattention to his essays, though they were vigorously written and presentedstrong arguments in defense of the Lord Chamberlain's intervention in DruryLane affairs. Steele acknowledged the first number of _The Anti-Theatre_(it appeared on February 15, 1720) in the fourteenth number of his ownpaper, praising Falstaffe for his promise not to "intrude upon the privateconcerns of life" in the debate which was to follow, but thereafter he allbut ignored his new rival. With the exception of a brief allusion in _TheTheatre_, No. 17 (an allusion which Falstaffe was quick to take up), Steelemade no more references to the other periodical. For a time Falstaffecontinued to answer the arguments Steele advanced in protest against theLord Chamberlain's action, but finding that he was unable to provoke aresponse, he gave up the debate. After his ninth number of March 14, he hadlittle more to say about Steele or Drury Lane. 

Falstaffe, however, did not stop writing when he ceased defendingNewcastle's action. _The Anti-Theatre_ continued to come out twice a weekuntil the fifteenth number appeared on Monday, April 4. And in that paperthere was no indication that the periodical was to end or was to be changedin any way. But on the day after, April 5, Steele issued _The Theatre_, No. 28, signed with his own name, which he announced would be the last in theseries. As no more _Anti-Theatres_ were known to have appeared after thefifteenth, it has generally been assumed (though as we now know, erroneously) that Falstaffe took his cue from Edgar and abandoned his ownseries. 

But there has long been some reason to believe that Falstaffe did not ceasewriting completely after the fifteenth _Anti-Theatre_. Though nothing wasknown of his later work, a newspaper advertisement of his _The Theatre_ wasnoted. But lacking any more definite information, scholars have doubtedthe existence of the periodical. A volume in the Folger ShakespeareLibrary, however, removes the doubt. There, bound with a complete set ofthe original _Theatre_ by Sir John Edgar, are the ten numbers of the later_Theatre_ which are reproduced here. These papers include the entire run ofFalstaffe's "continuation" with the exception of one number, thenineteenth, which has apparently been lost. So far as is known, the copiesin the Folger are unique. 

The continuation of _The Theatre_ bears little trace of the controversialbitterness present in Steele's paper of that name or in some of the earlynumbers of _The Anti-Theatre_. Except in the mock will in No. 16, there isno reference to Steele's dispute with Newcastle in the entire series. Nor, in spite of the title, is there any discussion of theatrical matters. As asource of information about the stage, it is virtually without value. Butif it be accepted as merely another of the gracefully written series ofliterary essays which were so abundant in the early eighteenth century, itsvalue and charm are apparent. The unidentified author was an accomplishedscholar, and he wrote on a variety of subjects which have not lost theirappeal. The interest aroused by the essays is perhaps inseparable from ourhistorical interest in the life and manners of the time, but it is none theless genuine. Perhaps nowhere more than in the personal essays aboutsubjects of contemporary importance--of which these are examples--is therea more pleasing record of the social and intellectual life of a period. 

Of the ten essays reproduced here, probably the first (No. 16) is the onlyone which contains allusions which will not be generally understood byscholars. In this paper, in the account of the death of Sir John Edgar andin the transcript of Edgar's will, there are references to Steele's disputewith Newcastle over the control of Drury Lane Theatre. Falstaffefacetiously recalls several points which were debated in the journalisticwar provoked by Steele's loss of his governorship, but in themselves thepoints are of too little significance to merit explanation. 

The several allusions to the South Sea Bubble in these essays will beeasily recognized. In Nos. 21, 22, and 26, Falstaffe considers theabsurdities engendered by the Bubble (as he had previously in _TheAnti-Theatre_, Nos. 10, 11, 12, and 14), exhibiting a healthy distrust ofthe fever of stock-jobbing then at its height. Though less extreme thanSteele in his criticism of the South Sea Company, Falstaffe shows himselfto have understood several months in advance of the crash the fundamentalunsoundness of the wave of speculation produced by the company's policies. 

The essay on duelling (No. 17) was probably suggested to Falstaffe by abill then pending in Parliament to make the practice unlawful. No other ofhis essays resembles more closely those of his predecessor, Steele, whoduring a lifetime of writing carried on a personal campaign to arouseopposition to duelling. In Steele's own _Theatre_, there are two essaysdevoted to the subject (Nos. 19 and 26). 

One of the most interesting of Falstaffe's papers is his twenty-fourth: hisdiscussion of the recently published memoirs of the deaf and dumbfortuneteller, Duncan Campbell, memoirs which we know to have been writtenby Daniel Defoe. And from Falstaffe's conspicuous reference to _RobinsonCrusoe_ in the paper, it seems evident that he also knew the identity ofthe author. What we have then is, in effect, a contemporary review ofDefoe's book. Maintaining an air of seriousness, Falstaffe examines theextravagant assertions made so confidently by Defoe, ironically suggestingthe implausibility and absurdity of some of them. Falstaffe'smatter-of-fact comments are well adapted to exposing the incredibility ofthe similarly matter-of-fact narrative of Defoe. 

Who Sir John Falstaffe was we do not know. No clue to his identity has beendiscovered. But from the essays themselves we learn something of his tastesand predilections. A strong interest in classical antiquity is apparent innumerous allusions to ancient history and mythology, allusions particularlyplentiful in _The Anti-Theatre_; an intelligent reverence for the writingsof Shakespeare may be observed in a series of admiring references; andfrom his repeated remarks about Spain and Spanish literature, both in _TheAnti-Theatre_ and in _The Theatre_, we may probably conclude that he hadsome special knowledge of that country and its literature. But all of thiscan be but speculation. We know nothing positively about Falstaffe exceptthat he wrote a series of engaging essays. 

Falstaffe's _Theatre_ is reproduced, with permission, from the papers inthe Folger Shakespeare Library. 

John LoftisPrinceton University

Numb. XVI

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _I am Myself, but call me What you please. _

 South. In Oroon. 

Saturday, _April 9. 1720. _

Men, that like myself, set up for being Wits, and dictating to the World ina censorial Way, should like Oracles endeavour to be barely heard, butnever have it distinguish'd from whence the Voice comes. _Faith_ and_Reputation_ have ever been built on _Doubt_ and _Mystery_, and sometimesthe Art of being _unintelligible_ does not a little advance the Credit of aWriter. There are many Reasons why we, who take upon Us the Task of Diurnalor Weekly Lucubrations, should be like the River _Nilus_, sending abroadfertile Streams to every Quarter, and still keeping our Heads undiscover'd. But why should I be compell'd to give Reasons for every thing? _WereReasons as plenty as Blackberries_, as my worthy Ancestor was wont to say, _I would not give a Reason upon Compulsion_. 

I have confess'd to the World I am a _Knight_ (nor am I asham'd to own it, tho' 'tis a Condescension as Knighthood goes;) and my Name is _JohnFalstaffe_; must they have too a Tree of my Pedigree, and a Direction to myLodgings? 'Tis ill-Manners to pluck the Masque off, when we would not beknown: besides that, Curiosity has lost Men many a Blessing, and plung'dthe Discoverers into signal Calamities; as witness _Oedipus_, and theOracle, _Lot's_ Wife, _Orpheus_ and _Eurydice_, and several other _true_and _ancient_ Histories, which I have something else to do than think of atpresent. 

It was an Opinion growing apace in the Town, that Sir _John Edgar_ and Iwere one and the same Man: but from what Tract or Circumstance this Notionsprung, I can neither learn nor guess. I mounted the Stage as theAdversary, and he accepted my Challenge: upon which I attack'd him withsuch Weapons as Men of Learning commonly use against one another, yet hedeclin'd the Combat. I was by This in Generosity compell'd to desist frompursuing him, yet every now and then I took upon me to reprimand him, whenI observ'd him too free in the Use of certain Figures in Rhetorick, whichare the common Dialect of a Part of the Town famous for _good Fish_ and_Female Orators_. Thus he continued his Course of Writing, sometimes veryobscure, sometimes too plain: according as either Vapours, or Spleen, orLove, or Resentment, or _French_ Wine predominated; which I, by my Skill inNatural Philosophy observing, thought it advisable to leave him to himself, till the Court of Chancery should appoint him a proper Guardian. I cannotdeny, but that we shook Hands behind the Curtain, and have been very goodFriends for these eight Papers last, have been merry without any Gall, heregarding me as a Gentleman Philosopher, and I looking upon him as aninoffensive Humorist. 

I confess that it contributes much to my Peace of Soul, that we werereconcil'd before his Departure from this Stage of Business and of Life. The Reader will hereby understand that Sir _John_ is dead: It is for thisReason that I appear in his Dress, that I assume his _Habit de Guerre_, forSir John chose me, from among all Men living, to be his sole Executor. ThePrinter had no _black Letter_ by him, otherwise this Paper (as in Decencyit ought) should have appear'd in Mourning: however I shall use as muchCeremony as the Time will allow; and, as _Hob_ did in the Farce by the Manthat hang'd himself, _I take up his Cloak, and am chief Mourner_. 

We never can do the Memory of a Great Man more Justice, than by beingparticular in his Conduct and Behaviour at the Point of Death. Sir _John_, tho' a Wit, took no Pains to shew it at his latest Hour, that is, he didnot dye like one of those _prophane_ Wits, who bid the Curtains be drawn, and said _the Farce of Life was ended_. This is making our Warfare tooslight and ludicrous: He departed with more Grace, and, like the memorableType of his Prudence, _Don Quixote de la Mancha_, where he perceiv'd hisSand was running out, he repented the Extravagance of his_Knight-Errantry_, and ingenuously confess'd his _Family Name_. He seem'dentirely dispos'd to dye in his Wits, and no doubt, did so: tho' byIntervals, 'tis thought he was a little delirious, talk'd of taking Coachto _Fishmongers_ Hall, broke into imperfect Sentences about _Annuities_ and_South-Sea_, and mutter'd something to himself of making Dividends of _Tenper Cent_ at least _six times a Year_. 

If Sir _John_ appear'd by all the Actions of his Life a Friend to Mankind, he certainly did so in a great Measure at his Death, by the charitableDisposition of what he died possess'd. I have given an Abridgment of hisWill, that the World may see he left his Legacies only where they weretruly wanted: Neither Favour nor Prejudice had any Influence over him inhis last Minutes, but he had nothing more at Heart than the Necessities ofhis Legatees. 

'_In Nomini Domini_, Amen. I _John Edgar_, &c. _Knight_, being sound inBody, but imperfect of Mind and Memory, do make this my last Will, &c. 

'_Item_, As to such personal Estate which I have the good Fortune to leavebehind me, I give and dispose thereof, as follows: And, best, I give andbequeath all and singular my _Projects_ to the Society of _Stockjobbers_, Share and Share alike, because I am sure they will be never the better forthem. 

'_Item_, I give and bequeath all my Right, Property and Share in the_transparent Bee-hive_ to my indulgent Friend and Patron, his Grace theDuke of ----, because he has taken such a particular Fancy to it. 

'_Item_, I give and bequeath the full _Profit_ of all those _Plays_ which Ihave _Intentions of writing_, if it shall happen that I live to the Poor ofthe Parish in which I shall dye: desiring it may be distributed by myExecutor, and _not come into the Hands of the_ Church-wardens. 

'_Item_, I give and bequeath my _Goosequilt_, with which I demolish'd_Dunkirk_, to such Person as shall appear most strenuous for the Deliveryof _Port Mahon_ and _Gibraltar_ to the _Spaniards_. 

'And as to such _Qualifications_ wherewith I am endow'd, which have alwaysserv'd me in the Nature of _personal Estate_, I dispose thereof as follows;First, I give and bequeath my _Politicks_ to the Directors of the _Academy_of _Musick_, my _Religion_ to the Bishop of B----, my _Eloquence_ to themost distrest Author in _Grubstreet_, who writes the _full Accounts_ of_Murthers & Rapes_, and _Fires_, and my _Obscurity_ to somebody that isinclin'd to turn _Casuist in Divinity_. 

'_Item_, I give my _Beauty_ to Mr. _Dennis_, because he had a Mind to stealit from me while I was alive. 

'_Item_, I give my _Wits_ to my Friends at _Button's_, my _Good Manners_ tothe _Deputy Governors_ of _Drury Lane_ Theatre; and my _Charity_ to the_married_ and _unmarried Ladies_ of the said Theatre; and lest Disputesshould arise about the Distribution thereof, it being too little for themAll, my Desire is, that they be determin'd in their Shares by Lot. 

'And I make and appoint Sir _John Falstaffe_, Knight, my full and wholeExecutor, and residuary Legatee, desiring him to continue my Paper of the_Theatre_, but after his own Stile and Method; and desiring likewise thatthe Sum of Forty Shillings may be given to the Boys of the _Charity School_of St. _Martin_ in the Fields, to write me an _Elegy_ any Time within_Eighteen_ Years after my Decease. '

He left several other Legacies to the Theatrical _Viceroys_, whose Interesthe had always so much at Heart, such as, his _Humility_, his _Learning_ and_Judgment_ in _Dramatick Poetry_; but these being Things _which they alwayslived without_, and which we are assur'd, _they will never claim_, wethought it needless to insert them. 

 * * * * *

Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XVII. 

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

 --_Animasque in vulnere ponunt. _

 Virg. 

Tuesday, _April 12. 1720. _

The Incident of a late _Prize_ fought at one of our Theatres, has given mesome Occasion to amuse myself with the Rise, and Antiquity of _Duelling_;and to enquire what Considerations have given it such Credit, as to make itpracticable as well in all Countries, as in all Times. Religion and CivilPolicy have ever declar'd against the Custom of receiving _Challenges_, anddeny that any Man has a Right, by a Tryal at _Sharps_, to destroy hisFellow-Creature. History, 'tis true; both sacred and prophane, is full ofInstances of these sort of Combats: but very few are recorded to havehappen'd between Friends, none on the light and idle Misconstruction ofWords, which has set most of our modern _Tilters_ at Work. The _Athenians_made it penal by a Law so much as to call a Man a _Murtherer_: and theDetestation of Antiquity is so plain to this inhuman Kind of Proceeding, that when _Eteocles_ and _Polynices_ had kill'd each other upon theimportant Quarrel of disputed Empire, the Government order'd theChallenger's Body to be thrown out as a Prey to the Dogs and Birds, andmade it Death for any one to sprinkle Dust over it, or give it the leasthonorary Marks of Interment. 

The _Duelling_ so much in Fashion for a few late Centuries is so scandalousto _Christianity_ and _common Understanding_, and grounded upon none ofthose specious Occasions which at first made it warrantable, that it ishigh Time the Wisdom of Commonwealths should interpose to discountenanceand abrogate a pernicious Liberty, whose Source springs alone from Follyand Intemperance. Sir _Walter Raleigh_ has very wisely observ'd in his_History_ of the _World_, that _the acting of a private Combat, for aprivate Respect, and most commonly a frivolous One, is not an Action ofVirtue, because it is contrary to the Law of God, and of all ChristianKings: neither is it difficult, because even and equal in Persons and Arms:neither for a publick Good, but tending to the contrary, because the Lossor Mutilation of an able Man, is also a Loss to the Commonweal_. 

Yet vile and immoral as this Custom is, it has so far prevail'd as to makeway for a _Science_, and is pretended, like Dancing, to be taught By _Rule_and _Book_. The Advertisements, which are of great Instruction to curiousReaders, inform us, that a late Baronet had employ'd his Pen in laying downthe _solid_ Art of _Fighting_ both on _Foot_ and _Horseback_: by reading ofwhich Treatise any Person might in a short time attain to the Practice ofit, either for the Defence of Life upon a just Occasion, or Preservation ofHonour, in any accidental Scuffle or Quarrel. That is, if I may havePermission, without being challeng'd, to divest the Title of its Pomp, thissolid Art would soon put one in a Capacity of killing one's Man, andstanding a fair Chance of bequeathing one's Cloaths and Neck to theHangman. It is observable, that Mr. _Bysshe_, in his Collection ofagreeable and sublime Thoughts, for the Imitation of future Poets, when hecomes to the Topick of _Honour_, ingeniously refers his Readers to the Word_Butcher_; tacitly implying that the Thoughts upon both Heads have a_Coherence_, as the Terms themselves are _synonomous_. In short, yourPractitioners in Duelling are so barbarous in their Nature; that theirwhole Study is picking up Occasions to be engaged in a Quarrel. They are asort of _Quixots_, whose heads are so full of mischievous Chivalry, thatthey will mistake the _Sails_ of a _Wind-mill_ for the _Arms_ of a _Gyant_;and it is fifty to one, if the most innocent Motions, Looks, or Smiles, arenot, by their Prepossessions, construed Airs of Defiance, Offence, orRidicule. There is a Passage in _Hamlet_, which never fails of raisingLaughter in the Audience; 'tis where the Clowns are preparing a Grave for_Ophelia_, and descanting on the Unreasonableness of her being buried inChristian Burial, _who willfully sought her own Salvation. Will you ha' theTruth or on't?_ says one of them wisely, _if this had not been aGentlewoman, she should have been buried out of_ Christian Burial. _Whythere though say'st it_; replies his Fellow, _and the more is the Pity thatgreat Folk should have Countenance in this World to drown, or hangthemselves more than us poor Folk_. The Application is so easy, that Ishall leave it for everyone to make it for himself. 

Next to my first Wish, that _Duelling_ were totally restrain'd, methinks, Icould be glad that our young hot _Bravo's_ would not be altogether_brutal_, but quarrel mathematically, and with some Discretion. I wouldrecommend the Caution, which _Shakespear_ has prescrib'd by an Example, ofoffering and accepting a Challenge. In one of his Plays, there is anhereditary Quarrel betwixt two Families, and the Servants on each Side areso zealous in their Masters Cause, that they never meet without a Desire offighting, yet are shy of giving the Occasion of Combat. The transcribing ashort Passage will give the best Idea of their Conduct. 

 Samp. _I will bite my Thumb at them, which is a Disgrace to them if they bear it. _

 Abra. _Do you bite your Thumb at Us, Sir?_

 Samp. _I do bite my Thumb, Sir. _

 Abra. _Do you bite your Thumb at Us, Sir?_

 Samp. _Is the Law on our Side, if I say, Ay?_

 Greg. _No. _

 Samp. _No, Sir; I do not bite my Thumb at you, Sir; but I bite my Thumb, Sir. _

The most beneficial Things to a Commonwealth will have some of its Memberswho will think them a Grievance. I have just now receiv'd the followingLetter from a _Fencing-Master_, who is very apprehensive of Businessfalling off, if the _Act_ against _Duelling_ should take place. 

 "Sir, "As you are both a Knight and a Gentleman (which now-a-days don't always meet in one Man) I will make bold to Expostulate with you upon a Bill depending in the House of Commons, I mean that against _Duelling_. Every good Subject has a right of dissenting to any Bill propos'd, either by petition, or Pamphlet, before it passes into a Law; and this concerns the Honour of all Orders of Men from the Prince to the private Gentleman. I make free to tell you in a Word, if this passes, there's an End of _good Manhood_ in the King's Dominions. How must all the Important Quarrels, which happen in Life, among men of Honour, be decided? Must a heedless sawcy Coxcomb frown, or tread upon a Gentleman's Toes with Impunity? No, I suppose, the great Cause of Honour must be determined by the womanish Revenge of Scolding; and when two Peers or Gentlemen have had some manly Difference, they must chuse their _Seconds_ from _Billingsgate_ or the _Bar_--Consider, Sir, how many brave Gentleman have comfortably kept good Company, and had their Reckoning always paid, only by shewing a _broad Blade_, and cherishing a fierce Pair of _Whiskers_. Good Manners must certainly die with Chivalry; for what keeps all the pert Puppies about Town in Awe, but the Fear of being call'd to Account? Don't you know that there are a Set of impertinent Wretches, who are always disturbing publick Assemblies with Riots and Quarrels, only upon a presumption of being hinder'd from fighting, by the Crowd? There will be no end of such Grievances, if this Law takes Place. Besides, Sir, I hope it will be consider'd, what will become of us Brothers of the Blade; the Art we profess will grow of no Use to Mankind; and, of Consequence, we shall be expos'd to Poverty and Disgrace. Consider, Sir, how many bright Qualifications must go to the finishing one of us; we require Parts as elegant, generous, and manly, as any Profession whatsoever; therefore, I hope, that some publick Spirit in the House of Commons, who is a Lover of his Country, and a Friend to Arts and Sciences, will start up and distinguish himself against this Bill. You know that our Profession is justly call'd the Noble _Science_ of _Defence_, and makes a considerable Branch of the _Mathematicks_; if the Ignorant should gain this Point against us, they won't stop here; no doubt, their Design is to attack all Arts and Sciences, and beat them one by one quite out of the Nation; the _Assault_, 'tis true, seems only made against us; but wise Men foresee that all Learning is in Danger. Our Adversaries are upon the _Longe_ with their Swords just at our Breasts, I desire therefore your Advice and Assistance, in what _Guard_ we must stand to _parry_ this fatal _Thrust_. Yours, "FLANKANADE. "

 * * * * *

Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XVIII. 

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _Totum hominem Deus adsumit, quia totus ab ipsô est; Et totum redimit quem sumpserat, omne reducens Quicquid homo est, istud Tumulis, ast istud Abyssô. _

 Prudent. 

 [Greek: Phthenxomai hois themis osti, thuras d' epithesthe bebêlois. ]

 Orpheus. 

Saturday, _April 16. 1720. _

The Person, who confines himself to the Task of writing a Paper ofEntertainment, is not thereby obliged to be continually ludicrous in hisComposition, or to expect that his Readers should always be upon the broadGrin. The _rational_, as well as _risible_, Faculties are to be exercised;and if I think fit to be too precisely serious to Day, my good-natur'dCustomers will give me an Indulgence, and believe that I will make it up tothem with Mirth on _Tuesday_. 

As I devoted the spare Hours of yesterday to Meditation, I could not helpreflecting, what little Notion we have at this Time of _Prodigies_ and_Phenomena_, that are not in the common Course of Nature. We are grown_Epicureans_ in our Principles, and force our selves to believe, that it isFear, Superstition, or Ignorance, to fancy that Providence sends the Worlda Warning in extraordinary Appearances: We buoy our selves up, that we onlywant such a Portion of Philosophy to account for what startles theGrossness of Sense, and to know that such Appearances must have their Causein Nature, tho' we cannot readily determine where to fix it. This brings tomy Mind, when _Glendour_ was boasting in the Play, that at his Nativity theHeavens were full of fiery Shapes, and the Foundation of the Earth shooklike a Coward; _Hotspur_ reply'd humourously, _Why so it would have done atthe same Season, if your Mother's Cat had but kitten'd, tho' your self hadnever been born_. 

If we are to think so slightly of these uncommon Accidents, since theFashion of the Times will call them so, I would fain be resolved in onePoint, how it comes to pass, that the Birth and Death of so many eminentPersons, and of Consequence to the World, have been mark'd and usher'd inwith such a Pomp of Prodigies. The same great Poet, whom I but now quoted, observes finely, that, _When Beggars die, there are no Comets seen: The Heav'ns themselves blaze forth the Death of Princes. _

The whole Concurrence of Historians, even of the most undoubted Authority, have struck in, and espoused this Opinion. They are not all Fools andsuperstitious Dotards, nor tied by any Obligations to record a Set ofMiracles, which in their own private Thoughts they counted absurd, andlaugh'd at. Every Pen, that has touch'd the Circumstance of _JuliusCæsar's_ Death, has consented to relate the Strange Things, which bothforesaw and foretold his Assassination. _Shakespear_ has communicated theseTerrors to his Audience with the utmost Art: The Night is attended withThunder and Lightning; and _Cæsar_ comes forth in his Night-gown, reflecting on the Unquietness of the Season, and ordering the Priests to dopresent Sacrifice: _Calphurnia_ immediately follows him; and theUndauntedness of his Spirit, attack'd by the Tenderness of his Wife'sTears, gives an Occasion for the following Recital. 

 Cæsar, _I never stood on Ceremonies; Yet now they fright me: There is one within, Besides the Things that we have heard and seen, Recounts most horrid Sights seen by the Watch. A Lioness hath whelped in the Streets; And Graves have yawn'd, and yielded up their Dead: Fierce fiery Warriours fight upon the Clouds, (In Ranks and Squadrons, and right Forms of War) Which drizzled Blood upon the_ Capitol. _The Noise of Battle hurried in the Air, Horses did neigh, and dying Men did groan, And Ghosts did shriek, and squeal about the Streets. O_ Cæsar! _These Things are beyond all Use, And I do fear them_. 

The Poet, tho' he has adorned this Description by his Art, has been carefulto collect its Substance from the Historians. Every Particular is preservedto us by the _Heathen_ Writers; and not a _Heathen_, that we know of, didever dispute the Truth of it. The Love and Esteem which the Generality boreto the Person of _Cæsar_, the Reverence which they paid to the Dignity ofhis Character, and the important Services which he had done theCommonwealth, contributed not only to convince them of these Prodigies, butto make some effort, that the Gods had received him into their Number. 

The Use, which I intended from this Subject, is, that as _Christians_, whohave more invaluable Obligations to remember, we should suffer our Faithand Gratitude to extend as least as far as the _Pagans_ did. There was adread Time (for the Commemoration whereof a Day is annually set a-part)_when the Sun was eclipsed, and Darkness was over all the Land; when theVail of the Temple was rent asunder from the Top to the Bottom; when theEarth quaked, and Rocks were split; when the Graves were opened, and theBodies of Saints, which slept in Death, arose and walked_. Let _Atheists_alone, and _Freethinkers_ disbelieve the Terrors of that Hour. 'Twas fitthat Nature should feel such Convulsions, when the Lord of Life sufferedsuch Indignities. 

I almost fear least my Readers should suspect that I am usurping theProvince of the Pulpit, and therefore I shall continue this Discourse inthe Words of a Poet, who will ever be esteemed in the _English_ Tongue. When _Adam_ is doom'd to be turn'd out of Paradise, _Milton_ has by a happyMachinery supposed, that the Angel _Michael_ is dispatched down topronounce the Sentence, and mitigate it by shewing _Adam_ in Vision, whatshould happen to his Posterity. Amongst the rest, the _Incarnation_ isshadowed out; and the Angel tells him, that the _Messiah_ shall spring from_his_ Loins, and make a Satisfaction for the Punishment, which _he_ by hisTransgression had earned on himself and his Race. 

 _For this he shall live hated, be blasphem'd, Seis'd on by Force, judg'd, and to Death condemn'd, A shameful and accurst, nail'd to the Cross By his own Nation, slain for bringing Life; But to the Cross He nails thy Enemies The Law that is against thee, and the sins Of all Mankind, with him there crucified, Never to hurt them more, who rightly trust In this his Satisfaction: So he dies, But soon revives; Death over him no Power Shall long usurp: e'er the third dawning Light Return, the Stars of Morron shall see him rise Out of his Grave, fresh as the dawning Light, The Ransom paid, which Man from Death redeems. _

I cannot better conclude the Triumph of this Promise, than by the Speech, in which _Adam_ expresses his Joy and Wonder at these glad Tidings. 

 _'O Goodness infinite! Goodness immense, That all this Good of Evil shall produce, And Evil turn to Good; more wonderful Than that, which by Creation first brought forth Light out of Darkness! Full of doubt I stand, Whether I should repent me now of Sin By me done and committed, or rejoice Much more, that much more Good thereof shall spring. _

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Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XX. 

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _Tristius baud illis monstrum, nec sævior ulla Pestis, & ira Deum_, Stygiis _sese extulit oris. _

 Virg. 

Saturday, _April 23. 1720. _

It is very odd to consider, yet very frequently to be remark'd, that tho'we have all so many Passions and Appetites pushing for the Government ofus, and every one of us has a Portion of Reason, that, if permitted, wouldregulate our Conduct: yet we are obstinate not to be directed by thatReason, and give the Rein and Regulation of our Actions over to thePassions and Appetites of other People. This is putting our selves upon theFoot of _Epicurus's_ Deities, who were too indolent to look after the Worldthemselves, and left the Task of Providence to Chance and Second Causes. 

I grant, it is very necessary that our Misconduct should be assisted, andset right by wiser Judgment; but the Danger is, and especially among theFemale Sex, into what Hands this Power of Direction is committed. The Trustof Friendship is so often betrayed, and the Duty of the Office postponed toprivate Interest, that it is a Question whether we are not safer, while wegive a Loose to our own extravagant Excursions. The Institution of_Douegnas_, or Governesses in _Spain_, we do not doubt, was a Design wellbefitting the Caution of that wise and reserved Nation; but the Corruptionof the Persons intrusted, soon brought them into so much Disreputation, that they became the Objects of hatred and Scandal. 

Don _Francisco de Quevedo_, in his general Satires, has set these Vermin insuch a Light, as gives a shrewd Suspicion of their having been mischievousin his own Family. He dreams that he is got within the Confines of Death, and, among the other visionary Figures presented, he is encountred by anold _Governante_. _How's this_! says he, in a great Amazement, _Have ye anyof those Cattle in this Country? Let the Inhabitants pray heartily forPeace then; and all little enough to keep them quiet_. In short, he makesthe old Gentlewoman acquaint him, that she had been Eight Hundred Years inHell, upon a Design to erect an Order of the _Governantes_; but the RightWorshipful _Satanic_ Commissioners were not as yet come to any Resolutionupon the Point: For, they said, if your _Governantes_ should come once tosettle there, there would be no Occasion for any other Tormentors, and theDevils themselves would be but so many _Jacks out of Office_. _I havebeen_, says she, _too in_ Purgatory _upon the same Project, but there sosoon as ever they set Eyes upon me, all the Souls cried out unanimously_, Libera nos, Domine. _And as for_ Heaven, _That's no Place for Quarrels, Slanders, Disquiets, Heart-burnings, and consequently none for_ Me. 

These are the _Douegna's_ which the Suspicions of the _Spaniards_ at firstintended as Spies upon the Conduct of their Wives and Daughters. We have aSpecies of _Governantes_ among us in _England_, who being admitted into aFamiliarity in Families, by Policy improve it into Friendship: thisFriendship lets them into a Degree of Trust, which they are diligent toturn into the best Advantage; and having always little servile Ends oftheir own to obtain, their surest Step is to sow Dissention, and strengthentheir own Interest, by alienating the Affections of the Wife from herHusband; whose _Bread_ they are eating at the same Time, that they areundermining his _Quiet_ in the nearest Concerns of Life. 

Making a Visit the other Day to my Friend _Gellius_, who happened to beabroad, I found the Partner of his Bosom _Clarissa_, and her eternalCompanion _Drusilla_, all in Tears. I was not received with that openFamiliarity, which was used to be shewn me; and I observed something inthem of that kind of Reserve, which is common with People who are undersome great Affliction. I at first apprehended, that some fatal Accident hadhappen'd to the Person or Circumstances of my Friend; but, upon Inquiry, Iwas set easy as to these Fears, tho' they would give me no Hint, by which Imight guess at the Cause of their Disquietude. Finding them in aDisposition so unapt for Mirth, I took my Leave; judging, it could be noworse than some little domestick Misunderstanding, occasion'd, perhaps, bya disagreeable Command on the Side of the Husband, or some Contradiction onthe Side of the Wife. But my Man, who is very intimate with all theServants, has since let me into the Secret. It seems, there is a strangeUnion of Souls between these two Ladies; from what Affinity of Disposition, or mysterious Impulse, is a Secret only known to Nature and themselves. They love and hate alike; their Sympathies and Antipathies are the same;and all Joys are tasteless to the One, without the Company andParticipation of the Other. Their Affection is of that tender, thatdelicate Nature, that the smallest Jealousie, the least Unkindness blastsit. It happen'd one Day, that _Clarissa_ was more than commonly civil toher Husband: There was something past between them, that look'd likeFondness, and this in the Presence of _Drusilla_: Who can express thePassions that struggled in the Female Rival's Soul? Despair, Rage, Jealousie, and Anguish at once possess'd her; and it was now Time to retireto Sleep; the Lady with her Husband withdrew to Bed, and the jealous Friendlikewise committed her self to her Pillow, tho' not to Rest. Her Soul wasbusied with the bitter Reflexion of what had past, and what furtherEndearments might be practis'd. Unable to compose her self, she resolves torise, and pretends Sickness: _Clarissa_ is disturbed from the Embraces ofher Husband; nor is suffer'd to go back to the Bed of Wedlock, till she haspromis'd her disgusted Friend, by a forc'd Indifference to restrain theLiberties of the inamour'd _Gellius_. 

The learned Times, I find, were not unacquainted with these _FemaleIntimacies_: And by the Names they affix'd to the Persons practising them, which I shall forbear to mention, 'tis plain they put none of the bestConstructions on their Familiarities. 

_Plato_, I remember, offers at a Reason in Nature for such Conversations. He tells us, that at first Mankind were made with _Two_ Heads, _Four_ Arms, _Four_ Legs, and so every Way double: that of these, there were _three_Sorts; some, double Men; some, double Women; and some Hermaphrodites. _Jupiter_, upon an Offence committed, split them all into _Two's_; fromwhence arises in Mankind that Desire of a Companion, as his other half toperfect his Being. The Consequence of this Division was, that they, who intheir original State were _double Men_, are still fond of the _Ganymede's_with smooth Chins; and they, who were at first _double Women_, are at thisDay enamoured of their own Sex, and _Platonicks_ as to any Commerce withOurs. 

I have heard so much to the Disadvantage of these _Inamorata's_, that Iconsider a Man, who is link'd to such a Wife, in the State of the _Lover_and his _Two Mistresses_ in the _Fable_. The one, who was a little turnedin Years, pulled out all his _black_ Hairs, to make him look nearer to herStanding: and the other, who was in her Bloom, pick'd out all the _grey_ones, that the World might not suspect she had an Old Man; 'till betweenthem, they made him as bald as Father _Time_ himself. 

I shall conclude with the Story of an unfortunate Gentleman, who hadsuffer'd heavily in this Way, and went abroad to avoid his Slavery. As hewas travelling from _Madrid_ to _Valladolid_, he found himself belated, andwanted to take up his Night's Quarters in some middle Place. He wasinformed, the nearest Way would bring him to a small Village, call'd_Douegnas_; which with us would be the Village of _Governesses_. _But isthere no other Place_, said he, _within some reasonable Distance, eithershort of, or beyond it_? They told him, No, unless it were at a _Gallows_. _Nay, there shall be my Quarters then_, said he, _I am resolved; for aThousand_ Gibbets _are not so bad to me as One_ Douegna. 

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Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XXI. 

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 [Greek: Kronidês phrenas exeleto Zeus]. 

 Homer. 

Tuesday, _April 26. 1720. _

The Writer who attempts either to divert, or instruct the Town, has, perhaps, a worse Chance of succeeding now, than in any Age before. TheConversation of the World is changed, Gaiety and Mirth are banished fromSociety, and the buisy Affair of Avarice has taken up the Thoughts of everyCompany; if a Man in a Coffee-House takes up a _News-Paper_, the firstThing he turns to is the Price of the _Stocks_; if he looks over the_Advertisements_, it is in Quest of some new _Project_; when he hasfinished his Enquiry, and mixes in Conversation, you hear him expatiateupon the Advantage of some favourite Project, or curse his Stars formissing the lucky Moment of buying as he intended at the Rise of theSouth-Sea. Another complains of the Roguery of some Broker or Director, whom he intrusted; this I have heard canvass'd over and over, with so manyAggravations of Meanness and Knavery against each other, that, I confess, Ishall never see a poor Malefactor go to suffer Death for robbing another often Pounds upon the High-Way, but I shall look with Compassion on hisCondition, and perhaps reflect secretly upon the Partiality of publickJustice. I know so many little infamous Frauds, so many Breaches of Honour, and Friendship, in the Conduct of these Persons, that I should think it aPiece of Justice to expose them, could I imagine it would bring them toShame or Amendment; but I shall leave them to work their Way to _Wealth_and _Contempt_, which I presume they will be very well contented with; norenvy any Man the Merit of his Poverty and good Nature. But I cannot forbearadmiring the Nature of Projects, and by what furious Impulse Mankind iscarried into them: No Person asks the Question, whether they be for theGood of the Nation; for, it seems to me, that no Man cares, provided hegets by them himself. 

We use our Country like our Step-Mother, we have no natural Affection forher, we are Foreigners to her Blood, and when we have sucked her dry, wemake no Returns of Gratitude in her Necessities, but turn her loose toshift for her self; I think this the Case, if you consider the Condition ofa rising Project, which every Man that's concerned in, intends to get outof, and declares he will not trust too long. 

I have very little Capacity, or Inclination, to argue upon this Subject;and being a little indolent withal, I shall take the Liberty ofentertaining to Day with a Story, that lies ready at my elbow; and which Ideclare before-hand, has no significant Meaning in it, that I know of: Ifthe Sagacity of my Readers can make more of it than my self, in God's Name, let them please themselves with the Application. 

There is a small _Island_ on the Coast of _Denmark_, in which there arefive Towns; the Lord of this Place was very poor, rather because he covetedmuch, than that he wanted any Thing. God has afflicted the Inhabitants witha general Inclination in them all to be _Projectors_, so that the Landseemed to be infested with as many Monsters as there were Men: Soprodigious was the natural Proneness to projecting in that Country, thatthe very sucking Babes cried out _Project_, before they could say _Papa_ or_Mamma_; the whole island was a confused Chaos, for Man and Wife, Fatherand Son, Neighbour and Neighbor, were ever jangling about their Projects, and they were as intoxicated with them as if they had been drunk with Wine. The Lord of this Place ordered a general Examination of all _Projects_. Legions of _Projectors_ assembled before his Palace with Skrips and Scrollsof Paper stuck in their Girdles, run through their Button-holes, andpeeping through their Pockets. The Lord having made known his Wants, demanded their Assistance; and they all at once laying hold of theirPapers, and crowding till they had almost stifled one another, in anInstant heap'd up four Tables with their Memoirs. The first Paper he casthis Eyes on was, _How to raise an unmeasurable Treasure by Subscription ofall that Men are worth, and yet inrich them by taking it away. The firstPart_, quoth the Lord, _of taking from all Men, I like; but as to thesecond, which is to inrich them by taking it away, I am dubious of, yet letthem look to that_. He looked over a Multitude of others. In the mean Timethe Projectors quarrelled, each approving his own Scheme, and condemningthe rest; and they grew so Scurrilous, they called one another _Sons ofProjectors_ instead of _Sons of Whores_. The Lord commanded Peace, andbeing tempted with their Offers, receiv'd and allow'd several of theirProposals: Whereupon they all swore they would stand by him in allExtremities. A few Days after, the Lord's Servants came out, and cried thePalace was on Fire in three several Places, and the Wind blew high. TheLord was in a great Consternation; the Projectors gathered about him, bidhim sit still, and be easy, and they would set all to Rights in a Moment;Upon which they fell to Work, and laid their Hands on all they found in theHouse, casting every Thing of Value out at the Windows; others with Sledgesthrew down a Tower; others cried the Fire would cease, as soon as it hadVent, and fell to unroofing the House; and so destroy'd the whole Structurethey were called to save. None endeavoured to extinguish the Fire; theywere all busy in confounding every Thing they could grasp. At length theSmoak decreased, and the Lord, going out, perceived that the common Peoplehad master'd the Fire, while the Projectors had demolished his Palace, anddestroyed his Furniture: Incens'd and raging at this Sight, he cried out, _Rogues, you are worse than the Fire, and so are all your Projects; it werebetter I had been burnt, than to have given Ear to your destructiveCounsels. You overturn a whole House, least a Corner of it should fall; youfeed a Prince with his own Limbs, and pretend to maintain him, when he isdevouring himself. Villains, justly did the Fire come to burn me, forsuffering you to live; but, when it perceived me in the Power ofProjectors, it ceased, concluding I was already consumed. Fire is the mostmerciful of Projectors, for Water quenches it; but you increase in spightof all the Elements_. Princes may be poor; but when they once have to dowith Projectors, they cease to be Princes, to avoid being poor. 

 * * * * *

Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XXII

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _Quos_ Jupiter _vult perdere, dementat prius. _

Saturday, _April 30. 1720. _

It is common with Authors of my Rank to give themselves Airs ofConsequence, when they assume a Right of correcting, or reforming, theVices, or Follies of the Age. The late Sir _John Edgar_, of obscure Memory, pretended to define a Sort of Men whom he called _wrong-headed_, and hastold two or three Stories by Way of Examples, from whence he wou'd have youthink, that a Slip of Memory, is an Error in Judgment; as you may see inhis Instance of the Foot Soldier, who robbed the Gentleman, and forgettingthat he had put the Things into his own Pockets, afterwards changed Coatswith the Gentleman, and by that Means put him again in Possession ofwhatever he before had robbed him. Without any Malice to Sir _John's_Remaines, I shall beg Leave to observe, that the Term _wrong-headed_ moreproperly belongs to him, who has an ill Turn of thinking, and judging, thanto him who commits a careless Oversight, which is common to Men of the bestParts. My Reason for introducing this, is, from some Reflections that Ihave made on the Subject of my last Paper; by which it appears to me thatthere are Multitudes of this Sort of People in the World, pursuing Fortunein a very giddy Way. I suppose it will be thought ridiculous, to call him_wrong-headed_, who by any Artifice shall improve his Estate; yet when theMisfortunes of others, and those by much the greater Number, and a Decay ofTrade are put in Ballance against that Artifice, I doubt this Charge mustbe somewhere, tho' I am not cunning enough to tell where. As I see butlittle Company, and retire for my Ease and the Improvement of my Studies; Iwas deeply ingaged in Thought the other Night upon this Topick, and in madesuch a strong Impression upon me, that it produced a very odd Dream. As itis the Weakness of Women, and old Men, to be fond of telling their Dreamsto their Friends, I hope my Readers will excuse me this Infirmity of myAge. 

Methought, I saw a Lady of a middle Age, large Stature, and in the Fulnessof her Beauty, stand before me, magnificently dress'd; I had not Leisure toperuse her, before she began to walk about, skip and dance, and used somany odd Gestures, that she appeared to me little better than mad. I hadthe Curiosity to approach, to observe what she might be, when uponcontemplating her Features, her Dress, and her Air, I fancied, I had seenher exact Likeness in several Maps and Drawings in _Metzo-Tinto_, where herForm was made use of to express _Britannia_. This gave me a Tenderness andCompassion for her Condition; I ask'd her many Questions, by her Repliesto which I perceived her Head was a little turned, and her Notions ofThings extravagant. She owned, she had forsaken all those ingenious andindustrious Arts, which she had practised long to the Wonder of herNeighbours, with the Reputation of a discreet and vertuous Matron, and nowwas resolved to turn _Rope-Dancer_. This was no sooner said, but she fallsto work, to setting up her Tackle with proper Supporters; and to my verygreat Astonishment fixed one End of her Rope in _France_, and t'other in_Holland_. The Inhabitants of these Countries flock'd to behold her, watching and wishing for her Fall, and every one ready to receive her; shetottered strangely, and seemed ready to come down every Minute; upon whichthose below stretch'd out their Hands in Order to pull her down, and shewedJoy, and Disappointment, in their Looks alternately, as often as shestumbled or recovered. She begg'd for a Pole to poise her, but no bodywou'd lend her one; and looked about in vain for help. There appeared atsome Distance a Man in a broad Hat, and short Cloak, with a swarthyComplexion, and black Whiskers, who seemed altogether unconcern'd at whatshou'd happen; to her in her Frights she gave him many a Look, as if shesilently begg'd his Assistance, but whether she had done him any Injury, orthat her Pride would not suffer her to turn Petitioner, she seemed ashamedto call to him for Help. Thus she went on tottering, 'till she tore all herGarments, so that her Robes appeared like the ragged Colours in_Westminster-Hall_; at length seeing her Danger, he reached her out a Pole, and then she shewed a tolerable Skill and Agility; which the Peopleperceiving, who were towards France, they resolved to let go the Rope thatshe might slip down to their Side, and this gave me such Pain for herSafety, that I waked with a Start of Consternation. 

Tho' there was nothing in this but a Dream, it cannot be imagined howconcerned I was, that it did not last till I could be satisfied whether shefell, or no. I was grave for at least an Hour after, and reflected on thePolicy of those, who forsake a safe and profitable Path, for vain anddangerous Flights; I fancied my self a Politician too, and imagined I knewwhat a Nation of _Projectors_ must bring their Country to. I shall heremake a Digression, without giving any Reason for it; for since I am notbound to the Unities of Time, and Place, as we are in Poetry, I stand in noAwe of the peevish Criticks. 

Three _French_ Men were travelling into _Spain_, over the Mountains of_Biscay_: One of them trundled before him a _Wheelbarrow_, with Implementsfor grinding _Knives_ and _Scissors_; another carried a Load of_Mouse-Traps_ and _Bellows_; and the third had a Box of Combs and _Pins_. Apoor _Spaniard_, who was travelling into _France_ on Foot, with his Cloakon his Shoulder, met them half Way on the Ascent of a craggy Hill. Theysate down to rest in the Shade, and began to confer Notes. They asked the_Spaniard_, whither he was going? He replied, into _France_. What to do?says one of the _Frenchmen_: To seek my Fortune, replies the _Spaniard_: Hewas asked again, what Trade he was of? He answered, of no Trade at all: oflate, says he, we _Spaniards_ have been bred to no Trades; but those of usthat are poor, and honest, either beg or borrow; those, that are not, robor cheat, as they do in other Countries. How did you live in your ownCountry? says one of the _Frenchmen_. Oh! says the _Spaniard_, very wellfor a while; I had a great many thousand Pistoles left me by my Ancestors. What have you done with them? says one of the _Frenchmen_: I put them intoa _Policy_, says the _Spaniard_, where I was to have a great Interest forthem. And what became of that Policy? says one of the _Frenchmen_. The_Spaniard_ replied, that at first the Interest was paid, and then Thingswent merrily enough; but that in a little Time the Body _Politick_ became_Bankrupt_, and paid neither Principal nor Interest. And did all theAdventurers lose their Money? says one of the _Frenchmen_. All, replies the_Spaniard_, except those that were concerned in the Management: and isMoney plenty in _Spain_ now? says one of the _Frenchmen_. Never so scarce, answers the _Spaniard_; for all Degrees of Men, all Artificers, andMechanicks left off their Trades, and put their Effects into this Policy, that they might live at their Ease; and now they're all ruined; and of allthe immense Sums that were put into this damned Policy, there is not thehundredth Part to be found, and that is in the Hands of those few thatcheated the rest; but whether it be sunk again into the Bowels of theEarth, or where it is gone, we cannot tell. At this one of the _French_ Mensmiled, and told the _Spaniard_, he could let him into the Secret; _whileyour Nation was in Pursuit of this imaginary Mountain of Gold_, says he, _and all your People neglected their Employments; we, with such Trumpery asthese, have drawn away the Wealth of your_ Indian _Mines; we sell our Warein your Country, and carry your Money back to our own; By which Means weinrich our own Country, and impoverish yours: Of all the Treasures thatcome into_ Spain, _you enjoy only the Name; for while you are busy inChimera's, our Industry drains all the Treasure from you; and take thiswith you, that_ all Projects must end like the Searches for thePhilosopher's Stone, that is, in Smoke, where the _Interest_ is paid out ofthe _Principal Stock_, and is not supported by any industrious _Traffick_. 

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Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XXIII

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _Est genus hominum, qui esse primos se omnium rerum volunt, Nec sunt:--_

 Ter. 

Tuesday, _May 3. 1720. _

I find by a long Conversation with the World, and from Remarks I have madeon different Times and Sexes, that there is a Desire, or rather anAmbition, implanted in all humane Creatures of being thought agreeable; but'tis no unpleasant Study to observe what different Methods are taken ofobtaining this one universal End. The Ladies seem to have laid it up as aMaxim on their Side, that their Beauty is to be the greatest Merit; forwhich Reason no Art, or Industry, is wanting to cultivate that Jewel; andthere is so great an Adoration paid to it by all Mankind, that 'tis noWonder they should neglect the Qualifications of the Mind, Things merelyspeculative, for those Graces and Ornaments which command Respect, andwhose Dominion is owned as soon as seen. Upon the Foot of this Observation, some of our Sex, who are of the Order of the _Beau Garcons_, being equal tothe Ladies in their Understandings, employ all their Care and Capacity indecorating the Outside; and have a Notion that he's the most ingenious Man, who makes the cleanest Figure, and is best dress'd for the Assembly orDrawing-Room. Among these pretty Triflers, a good Embroidery on theirClothes, or a Sword Knot of a new Invention, raises more Emulation than aPiece of new Wit does among the bad Poets; in their View of Things, a Manof Sense is a very insignificant Creature; and if, with the _Eclat_ oftheir Dress, or Equipage, they can draw the Eyes of the Vulgar, they are inThat arrived at the Top of their Glory; since all they wish for is to betaken Notice of. 

There is another Order of _fine Gentlemen_ among Us, who study otherAccomplishments than That of Dress, by which they labour to recommendthemselves to Company. The prevailing Artifice of their Conduct is, inevery Stage of Action, to appear Great, and insinuate themselves to bethought the _Favourites_ only of the _Great_. These nice Oeconomists, beingequipped with one Thread-bare Suit, a _German_ Wig, guilty of few or noCurls, and happy in a single Change of Linnen, seem to despise allsuperfluous Ornaments of Garniture, and have no Time on their Hands, butwhat is spent in devising how to get rid, as they would have you suppose, of a Multitude of Engagements. There is a certain veteran Beau of myAcquaintance, who is highly caressed upon the Credit of his Intimacy withPersons of Quality whom he never spoke to; he has a Knot of vain youngFellows attendant upon him, whom he is to introduce into great Company; andhe has dropt some Hints, as if he would use his Interest to recommend someof them to Employments at Court. These are, for the most part, young Menstept into suddain great Fortunes, whose Rank and Conversation being at asuch a Distance from Title, they fancy that Men of Quality are not made ofthe same Materials with other Men. This industrious merry old Gentleman hasa peculiar Happiness in telling, and making, a Story; and, in the windingup or Catastrophe of it, never fails to surprize and please you, thereforehe diverts, as well as amuses his Company. It is to these Talents that hechiefly owes his Subsistance, for he is very little beholding to Fortune, or his Family. I am pleased to hear him relate the Adventures, that hisvery good Friend King _Charles_ the _Second_ and He have met with together;the Sword he wears (which, it must be confessed, looks something _antique_)was given to him on the Day of the Battle at _Worcester_ by that Monarch. This Weapon being reverenced by the Youths his Followers, one of themsollicited hard to purchase it. For ten Guineas, and to oblige a Friend, our Humorist was prevailed upon to part with it. Next Day he purchas'dexactly such another Peice of Antiquity for _Eighteen Pence_ in _Monmouth_Street, and has been so obliging, from Time to Time, to sell at least tenof these Weapons to young Fellows well affected to the Royal Family, andall presented to him by the same Monarch with whom he was so conversant. The Furniture of his Apartment is not very costly, as may be judged by hisCircumstances; a Gentleman visiting him one Morning, sat down upon a Stool, which being decrepit and crazy, he was apprehensive of a Fall; andtherefore throwing it aside with so much Negligence that its whole Framehad like to have been dissolved, the old Gentleman begged him to use itwith more Respect, for he valued it above all he was worth beside, it beingmade out of a Piece of the _Royal Oak_. His Visitant, who was a Man ofFortune, immediately had a Desire to be in Possession of such a Treasure:Over a Bottle he let him know his Inclination, and the good-natur'd oldGentleman, who could refuse nothing to so dear a Friend, was prevailed uponto accept of a _Gold Watch_ in Exchange for his _Stool_. It was immediatelysent down to the Mansion-house in the Country, where it is to be seenfinely incased, and is shewn to all Strangers as the most valuable Rarityof the Family. _Tom Varnish_, who is a Pupil of our old Humourists, is agood Proficient in his Way of Conversation: Whenever you see him, he's justcome from visiting some great Person of Quality. If a Game at _Hombre_ beproposed, and you are settling your Way of Play, he says, _We never play itso at the Dutchess's_. If you ask him to take a Glass of Wine at a Tavernwith you, he is always engaged in a _Parti quarre_; and then he speaks allthe _French_ he is Master of. If he has an Amour, it is with a Woman ofQuality. He sits in the Side Box the first Act of the Play, and stays nolonger, for some Reasons best known to himself. It happened once, that aPerson sat next to him, who, by his Star and Garter, he knew to be of thefirst Rank: _Tom_, seeing some of his Acquaintance in the middle Gallery, thought it would be for his Reputation to be seen to talk with thisGentleman; therefore, observing when the Eyes of his Acquaintance were uponhim, he drew his Lips near my Lord's Ear, and asked him _what a Clock itwas_; my Lord answered him; then _Tom_ look'd up again, and smiled; andwhen he talked with his Friends next, told them, that his Lordship hadinformed him of some Changes designed at Court, not yet made publick; andtherefore they must pardon him if he did not communicate. He did not comeoff so well upon another Occasion; for having boasted of a great Intimacywith a certain Foreign Minister, _Tom_ was asked by some Gentlemen to goone Evening to his Assembly: He willingly accepted the Party, thinking bytheir Means to get Admittance: They, on the contrary, expected to beintroduced by him; when they came into his Excellency's House, the Porter, who had dress'd himself in his great Coat, which was richly laced, andhaving a good Wig, well powder'd, was coming down to take his Post; _Tom_seeing the Richness of the Habit, fancied it was a Robe worn by Foreigners, mistook the _Porter_ for the Embassador, and, making several low Bows, began to address him with, _May it please your Excellency_. The Fellowanswered, Sir, if you'd speak with my Lord, I'll call one of his Gentlemento you; this raised a Laugh against him by his Companions, and _Tom_ walkedoff defeated in his Vanity, tho' he would fain have laid the Mistake on asudden Absence of Thought, and asserted, that he had frequently conversedwith the Ambassador. 

My old Friend, the Humourist, who is liberal of Talk in his Wine, I mustconfess, sometimes lets his Vain-Glory bring his Discourse under someSuspitions; especially, when upon the Strain of his Intimacy with King_Charles_. He tells how that Prince, seeing him one Morning in the Park, obliged him to take a Breakfast with him at _Whitehall_: As soon as theywere got into the Lodgings, the King called for _Kate_, meaning the Queen, made her salute his Friend, and asked her how she could entertain them. TheQueen, he says, seeing a Stranger, made some little Hesitations: But atlast, _My Dear_, says she, _we have nothing but a Rib of cold Beef atpresent, for yesterday, you know, was Washing-Day_. In short, he tells thisStory with so much Gravity, that you must either consent to believe it, orbe obliged to fight him, for suspecting the Truth of it. 

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Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XXIV

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _Hic est quem quæris, ille quem requiris_, Totâ _notus in_ Urbe. 

 Mart. 

Saturday, _May 7. 1720. _

I have more than once declar'd, that, as I set up for a publick Spirit, andam for countenancing every Thing which may give either Profit or Delight tomy Countrymen, no Essay, tending to the Improvement of any Art or Science, shall want my Approbation or Encouragement. This may seem a veryinconsiderable Assistance from a Person, whose Fortune, and Figure in Life, have not made him Great enough to be a profitable Patron to the Ingenious:But I have found, in many Instances, that the Approbation of a _grave_ Man, and such I am esteemed, has some Weight with the _Many_; since, it isobserv'd, that, in Works of Learning, not Half of Mankind judge forthemselves, and of Those who do, we may presume to say, that at least Halfjudge amiss. 

It is a trite Observation, but not unserviceable in Life, that _a Man hadas good be out of the World, as out of the Fashion_. This lays me under anObligation and Necessity of looking out for every Thing _new_, that startsinto the Publick. The Papers, which are mighty Helps to Intelligence ofthis Kind, have been big with advertising the History of the _Life_ and_Adventures_ of Mr. _Duncan Campbell_: And finding, by the Information ofthese Diurnal Oracles, that his Majesty _has received it very graciously_, I was induced to subscribe for this _remarkable_ Treatise. I must confess, I think it a Work of immense Erudition, full of curious Disquisitions intospeculative Philosophy, comprehending a large Fund of PhilologicalLearning, and furnished with some Remarks, that have escaped the Pens offormer Authors, who have writ in any Faculty whatsoever. 

Man's Life is so short, it has been the settled Opinion of the Wise, thatthis Prosecution of any single Subject would be sufficient to take up allhis Time. For this Reason, and especially in the Summer Season, when I makeshift to retire from this Metropolis of Noise and Business, I contract mySpeculations and Studies under one Head. To this End my great Care is, tocollect a small Parcel of useful Books, that may all contribute to one andthe same Purpose. As my Pleasure lies chiefly in searching after Truth, andAuthors, whose Aim is to inform the Mind, or reform the Morals, I havedetermined carefully to peruse once more these _Memoirs_, relating to thecelebrated Mr. _Campbell_. They are penn'd with a particular Air ofSincerity, and such a strict Regard to Truth and Matter of Fact, that theyseem a Copy, in this Point, from _Lucian's true History_. I have therefore, to satisfy my Readers of the Judgment which I make of Books, concluded toaccompany my Reflections over this Author, with reading, at properIntervals, the Surprizing Adventures of _Robinson Crusoe_, the Travels of_Aaron Hill_ Esq. , into _Turkey_, the History of the _Empires_ in the _Sun_and _Moon Worlds_, _Psalmonaazar's_ History of the Island of _Formosa_, and, that great Promoter of Christien Piety, the _Tale of a Tub_. 

As I have taken upon me to animadvert upon this Treatise, containing theAdventures and profound Skill of Mr. _Campbell_, I shall continue to do itwith the Impartiality of a true Critick. I have allowed the Author'sExcellencies, and am therefore at Liberty to observe upon his Errors. Hetells us, that _Lapland_ receives its Name from the _Finland_ Word _Lapp_, that is _Exiles_, and from the _Swedish_ Word _Lap_, signifying _Banished_. I am very loath my Countrymen should be deceived in such Matters ofLanguage: And therefore I think my self obliged to let them know, that thisRegion derives its Name from the _Lappi_ or _Lappones_, the originalInhabitants of it, who were People of a rude and blockish Behaviour: TheWord _Lappon_, being equivalent to _barbarous_, and _ignorant_, without theKnowledge of _Arts_ or _Letters_: And hence it comes, that this Clime hasbeen ever so proper for the Reception of _Witches_, and Propagation of the_Conjuring_ Trade. 

There is likewise one Circumstance, that, I own, a little shocks my Belief, in Relation to a young Lady, who, he says, was _bewitch'd_: nor do I thinktold it with that clean Regard to the Lady's Character, which Occurrencesof this Nature require. He says, she was in as bad a Condition, as He whowas possessed with a _whole Legion of Devils_: (An Account, which must ofcourse alarm her Lovers, and may, possibly, prevent her of good Match. )When he has related the miraculous Cure made upon Her, by Mr. _Campbell's_taking her up into his _Bed-chamber_, he adds, that she stood upright, drank a Glass of Wine, and evacuated a great deal of Wind. This Charge ofImmodesty upon a young Lady unmarried, is what I can by no Means allow: nordoes the _uncleanly_ Term become the Pen of a _chast_ and _polite_ Writer. But the Lady shall be vindicated from this Aspersion; for if you consultall Authors, both Ancient and Modern, no _Virgin_ was ever thought capableof such an _Indecency_. Nor can I forbear condemning his Want of Judgment, in refering you to the Lady for the Truth of this: since it is putting hisReputation upon a Circumstance, which is not consistent with her Modesty toadmit. 

There is another Passage in his Book of singular Mystery: he is pleased toobserve that Things are sometimes foretold by _smelling_, and That byPersons who are endued with a _Second-Sight_. This smelling of Futuritywould be of notable Use to Statesmen: which brings to my Mind, thatsomewhere in an Old Play, the Politician cries, _I smell a Plot_. TheVulgar too have an Expression, when they speak of a Man they don't like, of_smelling the Rogue_, and _smelling him out_. These Phrases, no doubt, hadtheir Original from this Kind of Prediction; and the terms remain, tho' theGift be in great Part lost among Men. If this Gentleman could again teachthe Learned to arrive at it, it would be attended with its Inconveniences, as well as Benefits; for we should have our _Politicians_ running theirNoses into every private Circumstance of Life, and a _Set of State Beagles_ever upon the Scent for new Treasons and Conspiracies: on the contrary, this Advantage might be derived, that an Invasion, which was neverintended, seen, or heard of, might be _smelt out_ by their _unerringSagacity_. 

Our Author proceeds to observe that Children, _Horses_, and _Cows_, havethe _Second Sight_ as well as Men and Women; yet at the same Time takes noNotice of _Hogs_, whom a great Part of the World have allowed to be giftedwith Second Sight, and to be able to foretel Storms, and _windy Weather_. This appears to me like Prejudice, and does not consist with the Candour ofan unbias'd Author: it looks as if he were carried away with the Humour ofhis Country, who are observed to be no Favourers of _Pork_, and thereforewill allow _Hogs_ no Share in _Divination_. 

Indeed, but that I am afraid of being suspected of too much Learning, orthat I would invalidate the Testimonies of this Author, I should be bold tosay, that no Part of the _Brute_ Creation have the Benefit of _SecondSight_: and that they have neither Organs, nor Reason, to discern, ordistinguish Phantoms, from material Bodies: and therefore the old _Rabins_very subtly conjectured, that the _Ass_, which carried _Balaam_, was not areal Ass, but the _Devil in Disguise_, and subject to the _Magical_ Powerof the _Prophet_. 

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Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XXV

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _When the Married shall marry, Then the Jealous will be sorry; And tho' Fools will be talking, To keep their Tongues walking, No Man runs well, I find, But with's Elbows behind. _

 Nostrad. _in_ Quev. 

Tuesday, _May 10. 1720. _

Upon the Perusal of my Motto, I believe my Readers will be puzzled tocomprehend what it is I aim at: It seems to be a perfect Riddle, and if youread it backward like a _Witches_ Prayer, it will be as easily understood. Yet let no Man condemn it for that trifling Objection, that he does notunderstand it: for, I can assure the World, that it is an old _Prophecy_, which comprehends many Secrets of Destiny, Stars, and Fate. Tho' theVulgar, whose Eyes are shut against these Mysteries, may endeavour toexplode all _Divination_; yet when the Prophecy comes to be fulfilled, theywill confess their own Ignorance, and give an implicit Belief to such_Revelations_, as are delivered to the Publick by those wise Men, who bytheir Art pry into the Cabinet of Futurity, and make to themselves_Spectacles_ of the _Planets_, by which they are enabled to read thedarkest Page in the Book of _Doomesday_. 

Having, in my last, given some Account of my intended Summer Library, itcannot appear strange, if I should already have anticipated a Part of myPleasure, and dipped into some of the promising Authors I mentioned. Thewitty _Quevedo_, in one of his visionary Prospects of Hell, fancies, hesees an _Astrologer_ creeping upon all Four; with a pair of Compassesbetwixt his Teeth; his Spheres, and Globes about him; his _Jacob's_ Staffbefore him; and his Eyes fixed upon the Stars, as if he were taking aHeight, or making an Observation. The Student, after gazing awhile, startedup of a sudden, and wringing his Hands, _Good Lord_! says he, _what anunlucky Dog was I! If I had come into the World but one_ Half Quarter _ofan_ Hour _sooner, I had beene saved: for just then_ Saturn _shifted, and_Mars _was lodged in the_ House of Life. Another Proficient in the sameArt, who was very loth to go to Hell before his Time, had his Tormentors besure he was dead: _for_, says he, _I am a little doubtful of it my self; inRegard that I had_ Jupiter _for my_ Ascendant, _and_ Venus _in the_ Houseof Life, _and no_ malevolent Aspect _to cross me. So that by the Rules of_Astrology, _I was to live, precisely_, a Hundred and one Years, two Months, six Days, four Hours, and three Minutes. 

It is plain from such Instances, and many more of equal Demonstration, hadI Leisure to collect them, that the Stars dispose of us as they please, andhave an Influence on every Action of our Lives. They are particularly busyin the Affairs of Women, and She that, by a too great Love of Society, hasbeen kind to others besides her own Husband, might have been an Example ofDiscretion and Modesty, had she been born a Minute sooner, or later, andhad a more _continent_ Planet for her _Ascendent_. I hope, this will besufficient to vindicate the Science from all Suspicions of Imposture. I canassure my Readers, that I my self saw a _Prophecy_ about _two_ Months_after_ the Battle of _Hockstadt_, which exactly described that great Eventin all its Circumstances. The same Prophecy foretold, that in seven Years_Lewis_ the _Fourteenth_ should not have Ground enough to make him a Grave;and tho' this did not exactly come to pass, it cannot be imputed to the_Ignorance_ of the Astrologer, but to those _Counsels_ and _Events_ whichwould not suffer the Prophecy to take Place. 

I am my self a considerable Proficient in this Study, and have told severalThings that have greatly surprized the Hearers. I am consulted chiefly bythe Ladies, who come to my Lodgings by _Two's_ and by _Three's_; and it ispleasant to hear them titter, and laugh among themselves, before theyventure to knock at my Door. The young Things come in blushing, and expressall the Fears and Confusions natural to Youth and Innocence: Immediately Iexamine them: One tells me, she desires to know _when she shall bemarried_; another is as importunate to learn _when she shall be a Widow_: Iinterrupt them, by telling one, I know that _she_ is a _married Woman_; andthe other, that _she_ shall soon be _married_. I proceed to ask themseveral Questions, which they are very ingenious in answering: And then Itell them a hundred Things, every one of which they knew to a Tittlebefore-hand. The Result is, that they go away frighted and amazed at myprofound Skill; and I often over-hear them saying, that _He certainly mustdeal with the Devil, or he could not have told us such and suchCircumstances_. 

But the Excellency of my Skill consists in giving an Account of thingslost: I would not have the Reader suppose that I descend to the triflingStudy of consulting Fate, about _who_ stole a _Spoon_, or _what_ became ofa straggling _Thimble_, Things of which the Stars take no Cognizance. TheseToys I leave to the Six-penny _Philomaths_ of _Moorfields_, and the_Astrologers_ of _Grub-street_: My Enquiries are a little more sublime. Iaccount for Things which some lose, and no other finds; of this Nature arethe _Maidenheads_ of _Women_, and the _Honour_ of _Great Men_. They, whoare short-sighted in the Sciences, cannot see they fly up to the _Moon_, from whence they never return, as the learned _Ariosta_ discovered beforeme: And therefore it is an Absurdity in our Language, and ought to becorrected, when we say of Things which we cannot account for, _I know nomore than the_ Man _in the_ Moon. 

Astrology consists of many Branches, which the Learned, who have travelledthro' the Spheres, very well know; and every Proficient takes the Roadwhich he likes best. A Student, now living, has made great Discoveriesconcerning the Duration of this _Earthly Globe_; and tho' by his Art hefound out, it could not last above _Ten_ Years, yet being a goodProtestant, and to shew his great Trust in Government Securities, hepurchased an Annuity for _Ninety and Nine_ Years, and, 'tis thought, meansto leave the _Reversion_ of it to the Poor till _Doomesday_. 

 * * * * *

Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

Numb. XXVI. 

THE

THEATRE. 

By Sir _JOHN FALSTAFFE_. 

_To be Continued every_ Tuesday _and_ Saturday. 

Price Two-pence. 

 _--Jam nunc debentia dici Pleraq; differat, & præsens in tempus omittat. _

 Hor. 

Saturday, _May 14. 1720. _

My first Entertainment in a Morning is to throw my Eyes over the Papers ofthe Day, by which I am informed, with very little Trouble, how Things arecarried in the great World. I look upon the printed News to be theHistories of the Times, in which the candid and ingenious Authors, out of astrict Regard to Truth, deliver Facts in such ambiguous Terms, that whenyou read of a Battle betwixt Count _Mercy_, and the Marquis _De Lede_, youmay give the Victory to that Side, which your private Inclination mostfavours. I have seen in one Paragraph the precise number of the _kill'd_and _wounded_ adjusted; and in the next, the Author seems doubtful in hisOpinion, whether there has been any Battle fought. In Domestick Affairs, our Writers are somewhat more bold in their Intelligence; and relate Thingswith a greater Air of Certainty, when they lie most under the Suspition ofdelivering false History. Thus it happens, that I have seen a great Fortune_married_ in the _Evening Post_ two Years after her _Death_; and a Man ofQuality has had an _Heir laid to him_, before he himself, or the Town, everknew that he was married. Thus they _kill_ and _marry_ whom they please, knowing well, that every Circumstance, whether true, or false, serves tofill up a _Paragraph_. 

As nothing can effect the Safety, and Welfare of the People, so much as the_Resolutions_ of our _House_ of _Commons_, I read over the _Votes_ with adiligent Concern. 'Tis there that every Man aggrieved is to find Redress;from their Proceedings is it, that Peace abroad, or Unity at home, must beexpected: and should they be byass'd, or deceived, their Error must involveMillions in Misfortunes. _Horace's_ Observation has ever prevailed, andwill continue to do so, while this is a World. _Delirant Reges, plectunturAchivi. _

I read a Resolution of that Honourable House lately, which gave me nolittle satisfaction, and which I had long expected from their Wisdom: viz. That all Methods of raising Money by _Voluntary Subscriptions_ areprejudicial to _Trade_. This is a Truth which every Man in Trade hasalready felt; and yet, tis amazing to observe how little Effect it has hadupon the Publick. Whereas by this Resolution it should have been expected, that such prejudicial Subscriptions were worth nothing, the Price of these_Bubbles_ immediately rose, and their Reputation and Number of Subscribersencreased in a greater Proportion, than before they were under any Censurefrom the State: It is hard to account for this Paradox: either theAuthority of Parliament has become a Jest, or we are under the strongestInfatuation that these Kingdoms ever felt. 

I am unwilling to publish the Reasons, which an intelligent Person gave me, for such Consequences: Because it would not do Honour to certain Persons, by whose Interest it is expected, that _Charters_ are to be obtain'd. As tothe Great _Bubble_, which as open'd a Subscription, where every Man is topay _five_ Times the Value of what he purchases, a Gentleman, who is veryconversant in Trade, informs me, that the Foreigners, who have OriginalStocks to a very great Value, have already sent Commissions to have it allsold, when it comes to this extravagant Price. By this Means, they willhave Opportunities of draining the Nation of its current Coin. I suppose, it will be answer'd, that the _Exportation_ of _Coin_ is provided againstby _Statutes_; it is granted; and so is the Exportation of _Wooll_: Yet weare all sensible, the Law is transgress'd every Day in this Point: And itmust be allowed, that Money may be as easily _smuggled_ as any Commoditywhatsoever. The Consequence of this will be, that a Circulation of _Paper_must be set on Foot to supply the Want of _ready Money_: And then, as Ihave read in a very witty Author, _a_ Crown-Piece _will be shewn about asan_ Elephant, _and_ Guineas _will be stiled of_ Blessed Memory. 

Without being deeply learned in Trade, this appears to me a naturalConsequence: Yet, notwithstanding all that can be said, I find the giddyMultitude resolute to forsake the profitable Paths of Industry, to grasponly at _Bubbles_ and _Shadows_. This calls to my Mind the Fable of_Jupiter_ and the _Old Woman_. The indulgent God gave the Woman a _Hen_, which laid a _Golden Egg_ every Day: She, not content with this slow Way ofgrowing rich, and being curs'd with a foolish Avarice, thought a Mine ofGolden Eggs must be lodged in the Hen's Belly: But, killing the Bird, shefound only common Entrails, and lost at once the _expected Treasure_, andthe Advantage which she reaped before, by its laying every Day. 

But it is Time to have done with these Discourses; the World is obstinatein the Pursuit of Follies, and not to be reclaimed either by the Authorityof Parliaments, or good Sense: It is not so much the Consideration of this, as the Season being so far advanced, which now induces me to lay down myPen. My Thoughts and Desires, I must own, are turn'd to Solitude and ruralPleasures. The Man, who desires to have his Body in Health, should risefrom Table with some Remains of Appetite, and not be covetous of gorging toSatiety: So a Writer, who would not wish to surfeit the Town, should submitto give over Writing, before they begin to think he has harass'd them toolong. 

The gay Part of the World are every Day retreating from the Field ofBusiness; and going with their Families into Summer Quarters. I look uponmy self in the State of a _Roman_ General, who has made a vigorous andsuccessful Campaign, and is now returning Home to take his _Triumph_. I amretiring to the Village, in which my Family for some Ages have made noinconsiderable Figure, and know I shall be received not with the singleRespect due to my Name and Quality, but as the Person who ingaged the latememorable Sir _John Edgar_. If Health and Fortune permit, next Season, Ishall again propagate my Character in the Town; in the mean Time, to makemy self the more conspicuous, I have ordered my _Lucubrations_ to beprinted in a _small_ Volumn, and to have one of the Books sent down afterme, which shall be chained in my Library, and go along with the_Mansion-House_ from Generation to Generation, as a lasting Monument inHonour of the Name and Erudition of Sir _John Falstaffe_. 

 * * * * *

Printed for W. BOREHAM, at the _Angel_ in _Pater-Noster-Row_, whereAdvertisements and Letters from Correspondents are taken in. 

THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY

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At least two items will be printed from each of the three followinggroups:

Series IV: Men, Manners, and Critics Sir John Falstaff (pseud. ), _The Theatre_ (1720). Aaron Hill, Preface to _The Creation_; and Thomas Brereton, Preface to _Esther_. Ned Ward, Selected Tracts. 

Series V: Drama Edward Moore, _The Gamester_ (1753). Nevil Payne, _Fatal Jealousy_ (1673). Mrs. Centlivre, _The Busie Body_ (1709). Charles Macklin, _Man of the World_ (1781). 

Series VI: Poetry and Language John Oldmixon, _Reflections on Dr. Swift's Letter to Harley_ (1712); and Arthur Mainwaring, _The British Academy_ (1712). Pierre Nicole, _De Epigrammate. _ Andre Dacier, Essay on Lyric Poetry. 

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ENGLISH LITERATURE OF THE SEVENTEENTH AND EIGHTEENTH CENTURIES

Students, scholars, and bibliographers of literature, history, andphilology will find the publications valuable. _The Johnsonian News Letter_has said of them: "Excellent facsimiles, and cheap in price, theserepresent the triumph of modern scientific reproduction. Be sure to becomea subscriber; and take it upon yourself to see that your college library ison the mailing list. "

The Augustan Reprint Society is a non-profit, scholarly organization, runwithout overhead expense. By careful management it is able to offer atleast six publications each year at the unusually low membership fee of$2. 50 per year in the United States and Canada, and $2. 75 in Great Britainand the continent. 

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New members may still obtain a complete run of the first year'spublications for $2. 50, the annual membership fee. 

During the first two years the publications are issued in three series: I. Essays on Wit; II. Essays on Poetry and Language; and III. Essays on theStage. 

PUBLICATIONS FOR THE FIRST YEAR (1946-1947)

MAY, 1946: Series I, No. 1--Richard Blackmore's _Essay upon Wit_ (1716), and Addison's _Freeholder_ No. 45 (1716). 

JULY, 1946: Series II, No. 1--Samuel Cobb's _Of Poetry and Discourse onCriticism_ (1707). 

SEPT. , 1946: Series III, No. 1--Anon. , _Letter to A. H. Esq. ; concerning theStage_ (1698), and Richard Willis' _Occasional Paper_ No. IX (1698). 

NOV. , 1946: Series I, No. 2--Anon. , _Essay on Wit_ (1748), together withCharacters by Flecknoe, and Joseph Warton's _Adventurer_ Nos. 127 and 133. 

JAN. , 1947: Series II, No. 2--Samuel Wesley's _Epistle to a FriendConcerning Poetry_ (1700) and _Essay on Heroic Poetry_ (1693). 

MARCH, 1947: Series III, No. 2--Anon. , _Representation of the Impiety andImmorality of the Stage_ (1704) and anon. , _Some Thoughts Concerning theStage_ (1704). 

PUBLICATIONS FOR THE SECOND YEAR (1947-1948)

MAY, 1947: Series I, No. 3--John Gay's _The Present State of Wit_; and asection on Wit from _The English Theophrastus_. With an Introduction byDonald Bond. 

JULY, 1947: Series II, No. 3--Rapin's _De Carmine Pastorali_, translated byCreech. With an Introduction by J. E. Congleton. 

SEPT. , 1947: Series III, No. 3--T. Hanmer's (?) _Some Remarks on theTragedy of Hamlet_. With an Introduction by Clarence D. Thorpe. 

NOV. , 1947: Series I, No. 4--Corbyn Morris' _Essay towards Fixing the TrueStandards of Wit_, etc. With an Introduction by James L. Clifford. 

JAN. , 1948: Series II, No. 4--Thomas Purney's _Discourse on the Pastoral_. With an Introduction by Earl Wasserman. 

MARCH, 1948: Series III, No. 4--Essays on the Stage, selected, with anIntroduction by Joseph Wood Krutch. 

The list of publications is subject to modification in response torequests by members. From time to time Bibliographical Notes will beincluded in the issues. Each issue contains an Introduction by a scholar ofspecial competence in the field represented. 

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GENERAL EDITORS

RICHARD C. BOYS, University of MichiganEDWARD NILES HOOKER, University of California, Los AngelesH. T. SWEDENBERG, JR. , University of California, Los Angeles

ADVISORY EDITORS

EMMETT L. AVERY, State College of WashingtonLOUIS I. BREDVOLD, University of MichiganBENJAMIN BOYCE, University of NebraskaCLEANTH BROOKS, Louisiana State UniversityJAMES L. CLIFFORD, Columbia UniversityARTHUR FRIEDMAN, University of ChicagoSAMUEL H. MONK, University of MinnesotaJAMES SUTHERLAND, Queen Mary College, London

Address communications to any of the General Editors. Applications formembership, together with membership fee, should be sent to

THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY310 ROYCE HALL, UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIALOS ANGELES 24, CALIFORNIA

or

Care of PROFESSOR RICHARD C. BOYSANGELL HALL, UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGANANN ARBOR, MICHIGAN

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