[Picture: Mr. Justice Gaselee (original of Mr. Justice Stareleigh), sketched by the Editor from the family portrait in the possession of H. Gaselee, Esq. ]

Bardell v. Pickwick

 The Trial for Breach of Promise of Marriage held at the Guildhall Sittings, on April 1, 1828, before Mr. Justice Stareleigh and a Special Jury of the City of London. 

 Edited with Notes and Commentaries by PERCY FITZGERALD, M. A. , F. S. A. 

 _Barrister-at-Law_; _and sometime Crown Prosecutor on the North-East Circuit_ (_Ireland_). 

 WITH ILLUSTRATIONS. 

 LONDON ELLIOT STOCK 62 PATERNOSTER ROW E. C. 1902

INTRODUCTION. 

There are few things more familiar or more interesting to the public thanthis _cause celebre_. It is better known than many a real case: forevery one knows the Judge, his name and remarks--also theCounsel--(notably Sergeant Buzfuz)--the witnessess, and what theysaid--and of course all about the Plaintiff and the famous Defendant. Itwas tried over seventy years ago at "the Guildhall Settens, " and wasdescribed by Boz some sixty-three years ago. Yet every detail seemsfresh--and as fresh as ever. It is astonishing that a purely technicalsketch like this, whose humours might be relished only by suchspecialists as Barristers and Attorneys, who would understand the jokeslevelled at the Profession, should be so well understanded of the people. All see the point of the legal satire. It is a quite a prodigy. Boz hadthe art, in an extraordinary degree, of thus vividly commending tradeprocesses, professional allusions, and methods to outsiders, and makingthem humourous and intelligible. Witness Jackson, when he came to"serve" Mr. Pickwick and friends with the _subpoenas_. It is a dry, business-like process, but how racy Boz made it. A joke sparkles inevery line. 

This trial for Breach has been debated over and over again among lawyersand barristers, some contending that "there was no evidence at all to goto the Jury" as to a promise; others insisting on mis-direction, and thatthere was evidence that ought not to have been admitted. The law hassince been changed, and by later Acts both Mrs. Bardell and Mr. Pickwickwould have been allowed to tell their stories and to have beencross-examined. Mrs. Bardell was almost justified in supposing that Mr. Pickwick was offering his hand when he was merely speaking of engaging aman-servant. But then the whole would have been spoiled. Under thepresent systems, this would all have come out. Mr. Pickwick, when itcame to his turn, would have explained what his proceedings meant. It isa most perfect and vivid satire on the hackneyed methods of the lawyerswhen dealing with the witnesses. Nothing can be more natural or moregraphic. It is maintained to something between the level of comedy andfarce: nor is there the least exaggeration. It applies now as it didthen, though not to the same topics. A hectoring, bullying Counsel, threatening and cruel, would interfere with the pleasant tone of theplay; but it is all the same conveyed. There is a likeness to Bardell_v. _ Pickwick in another Burlesque case, tried in our day, the well-known"Trial by Jury, " the joint work of Mr. Gilbert and the late Sir ArthurSullivan. The general tone of both is the same and in the modern workthere is a general Pickwickian flavour. Sir Arthur's music, too, ishighly "Pickwickian, " and the joint effort of the two humorists isinfinitely diverting. The Judge is something of a Stareleigh. 

The truth is that Boz, the engenderer of these facetiae, apart from hisliterary gift, was one of the most brilliant, capable young fellows ofhis generation. Whatever he did, he did in the best way, and in thebrightest way. But his power of observation and of seeing what might betermed the humorous _quiddity_ of anything, was extraordinary. 

To put absurdity in a proper view for satirical purposes, it has to begeneralised from a number of instances, familiar to all. Those legaloddities, the public had seen over and over again, but they had passedunnoticed till this clever observer set to work and noted them. As Isay, it required a deep knowledge of the law to set these things in agrotesque light. 

Boz had been a sort of general reporter on the _Chronicle_: he "took"everything. He had reported at police courts as well as at the lawcourts. His quick and bright intelligence seized the humours here, as itdid those of the street. He later reported in the Gallery, and wasdispatched across country in post-chaises to "take" eminent politicalspeakers--always winning the hearty commendation of his employers for hiszeal and energy. 

THE CAUSE OF ACTION. 

Mr. Pickwick was a well-to-do bachelor, who lived by himself near thecity, where he had been in trade. His age was about fifty, as can beaccurately calculated by his remark on the sliding at Manor Farm. "Iused to do so on the gutters when I was a boy . . . But I hav'nt donesuch a thing these thirty years. " This was said in 1828. He resided inGoswell Street--now Goswell Road--with a widow lady, whose husband hadbeen in the Excise. He cannot have paid more than a pound a week, if somuch, for two rooms on the first floor. There was no servant, and thehardworking landlady, Mrs. Martha Bardell, performed all the duties ofher household single-handed. As her Counsel later described it, --and seeall she did for him!--"She waited on him, attended to his comforts, cooked his meals, looked out his linen for the washer-woman when it wentabroad, darned, aired, and prepared it for his wear when it came home, and, in short, enjoyed his fullest trust and confidence. " Thus SergeantBuzfuz, duly "instructed. " Not only was there Mr. Pickwick, but therewas another lodger, and her little boy Tommy. The worthy woman took careof and looked after all three. This might incline us to take a favorableview of her. She regarded her lodger with feelings of veneration andattachment, of which proof is found in her later talk with Sam. To himshe said that "he had always behaved himself like a perfect gentlemen, "and then added this significant speech: "It's a terrible thing to bedragged in this way before the public, but _I now see_ that it's the onlything that I ought to do. " That is, she seems to have held out as longas possible, believing that her amiable lodger would act as a perfectgentlemen and like himself. But when she found that even an action hadno terrors for him, she saw that there was nothing else to do but to letthe action go on. 

And what was Mrs. Bardell like? One would imagine her a plump, buxomwidow, "fat, fair, and forty, " with her dear little boy, "the only pledgeof her deceased exciseman, " or say something between thirty and fortyyears old. Fortunately, two portraits have come down to us of thelady--one somewhat of this pattern, and depicting her, as she flungherself on Mr. Pickwick on that disastrous morning: the other--a swollen, dreadful thing, which must be a caricature of the literal presentment. Here we see a woman of gross, enormous proportions seated on the frontbench and apparently weighing some thirteen or fourteen stone, with avast coarse face. This is surely an unfair presentment of the worthylandlady; besides, Dodson and Fogg were too astute practitioners toimperil their chances by exhibiting to his Lordship and the Jury soill-favoured a plaintiff. Indeed, we are told that they arranged arather theatrical exhibition in this scene, with a view of creating animpression in their favour. 

Many find pleasure in reading the Bookseller's Catalogues, and a vastnumber are showered on me in the course of the year. But on one of theseI always gaze with a special interest, and even tenderness. For it comesfrom one Herbert, who lives in Goswell Road. Only think, _Goswell_Road--erst Goswell Street, where just seventy years ago Mrs. Bardell wasletting lodgings and Mr. Pickwick himself was lodging: and on the cover Iread, furthur attraction, "Goswell Road, near the 'Angel, '" whence the"stage" which took the party to the "Spaniard" at Hampstead started!Sometimes I am drawn to the shop, crowded with books; but one's thoughtsstray away from the books into speculations as to _which_ house it was. But the indications are most vague, though the eye settles on a decentrange of shabby-looking faded tenements--two storeys high only--and which_look_ like lodging houses. Some ingenious commentators have indeedventured to identify the house itself, arguing from the very generaldescription in the text. 

We should note, however, Mr. Pickwick's lack of caution. He came in thevery next day, having apparently made no enquiries as to the landlady. Had he done so, he would have learned of the drunken exciseman who methis death by being knocked on the head with a quart pot. He might haveheard of the friends, Cluppins, Raddle, etc. , who seemed to have beencharwomen or something of the sort; also that there was a sort of workingman as a fellow lodger. Above all, that there was no servant in thehouse. All which boded ill, and made it likely that Mr. Pickwick wouldbe the easy victim of some crafty scheme. 

All went well until the unluckly morning in July, 1827, when Mr. Pickwick's friends, coming to pay a morning call, and enteringunexpectedly, surprised Mr. Pickwick with his landlady fainting in hisarms in an hysterical condition. This was a very awkward business. Thedelinquent, however, did not at once grasp the situation, and could not"make head or tail of it, or what the lady meant. " His friends, however, had their doubts:

 'What _is_ the matter?' said the three tongue-tied Pickwickians. 

 'I don't know, ' replied Mr. Pickwick, pettishly. 'Now, help me, lead this woman down stairs. '

 'Oh, I am better now, ' said Mrs. Bardell, faintly. 

 'Let me lead you downstairs, ' said the ever gallant Mr. Tupman. 

 'Thank you, sir--thank you?' exclaimed Mrs. Bardell hysterically. And downstairs she was led accordingly, accompanied by her affectionate son. 

 [Picture: The cause of action]

 'I cannot conceive--' said Mr. Pickwick, when his friend returned--'I cannot conceive what has been the matter with that woman. I had merely announced to her my intention of keeping a man servant, when she fell into the extraordinary paroxysm in which you found her. Very extraordinary thing. '

 'Very, ' said his three friends. 

 'Placed me in such an extremely awkward situation, ' continued Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Very, ' was the reply of his followers, as they coughed slightly, and looked dubiously at each other. 

 This behaviour was not lost upon Mr. Pickwick. He remarked their incredulity. They evidently suspected him. 

It may be reasonably supposed that Mr. Pickwick had not been verydiscreet, or sufficiently cautious in his general behaviour to hislandlady. As we know, he was rather too effusive in his relations withthe fair sex. One of his weaknesses was _kissing_. He would kisseverybody who was young or good-looking. His maxim was "Kiss early andkiss often. " Who can forget his _systematic_ method of greeting theengaging Arabella? "He (1) took off his spectacles, (2) in great haste, and (3) taking both the young lady's hands in his (4) kissed her (5) agreat many times (6) perhaps a greater number of times than wasabsolutely necessary. " Old rogue! I have little doubt that on hisreturn home from his tours he encircled the buxom figure of Mrs. Bardell--all of course in his own paternal and privileged way. 

It should be borne in mind also that Mr. Pickwick was almost invariablydrawn into his more serious scrapes and embarrassments by this devotionto the sex. The night in the boarding school garden--the affair with thespinster lady--his interview with Arabella from the top of the wall--hisdevotion to Mrs. Pott and Mrs. Dowler--and much more that we do not hearof, show that he was a gallant elderly gentleman. Oh, he was a "sly dog, he was. "

There is a curious burst of Mr. Pickwick's which seems to hint at a sortof tender appreciation on his side. When the notice of trial was sent tohim, in his first vehemence, he broke out that Mrs. Bardell had nothingto do with the business, "_She hadn't the heart to do it_. " Mr. Pickwickcould not speak with this certainty, unless he knew the lady's feelingspretty well. _Why_ hadn't she the heart to do it? Because she wassincerely attached to him and his interests and was "a dear creature. "This, however, was a fond delusion of the worthy gentleman's. Persons ofher class are not quite so disinterested as they appear to be, especiallyif they have to interpret the various paternal and comforting advancesmade to them by their well to do lodgers. 

There is another factor which can hardly be left out, when consideringMr. Pickwick's responsibility--that is, his too frequent indulgence inliquor, and the insufficiency of his head to stand its influence. Nowthis was a very important day for him, the first time he was to set up aman servant. He had to break it to his landlady, who would naturallyresent the change. He may have been _priming_ himself with some of thoseperpetual glasses of brandy and water to which he was addicted, and whoknows but that, in his ardour to propitiate, he may have gone a _little_too far? This fact too, of the introducing a man servant into herestablishment, Mrs. Bardell may have indistinctly associated with ageneral change in his life. If she were to become Mrs. Pickwick herduties might be naturally expected to devolve on a male assistant. 

Next morning he and his friends quitted London on their travels toEatanswill in pursuit of adventure. He airily dismissed the matter. Wemay wonder whether he made any remonstrance to his landlady before hisdeparture. Probably he did not, fancying that she had been merely in aslight fit of the "tantrums. "

At Bury, however, after the boarding-school adventure, he was to bepainfully awakened. He was sitting with his friends after dinner at the"Angel, " in his happiest mood. Winkle had related his quarrel with Pott_in re_ Mrs. Pott, in a humorous fashion when one of the most delightfulof humorous scenes followed. 

Mr. Pickwick was proceeding with his scathing rebuke, when Sam enterswith a letter. 

 'I don't know this hand, ' said Mr. Pickwick, opening the letter. 'Mercy on us! what's this? It must be a jest; it--it--can't be true. '

 'What's the matter?' was the general inquiry. 

 'Nobody dead, is there?' said Wardle, alarmed at the horror in Mr. Pickwick's countenance. 

 Mr. Pickwick made no reply, but, pushing the letter across the table, and desiring Mr. Tupman to read it aloud, fell back in his chair with a look of vacant astonishment quite alarming to behold. 

 Mr. Tupman, with a trembling voice, read the letter, of which the following is a copy:--

 '_Freeman's Court_, _Cornhill_, _August_ 28_th_, 1827. _Bardell against Pickwick_. 

 _Sir_, _Having been instructed by Mrs. Martha Bardell to commence an action against you for a breach of promise of marriage_, _for which the plaintiff lays her damages at fifteen hundred pounds_, _we beg to inform you that a writ has been issued against you in this suit in the Court of Common Pleas_; _and request to know_, _by return of post_, _the name of your attorney in London_, _who will accept service thereof_. 

 _We are_, _Sir_, _Your obedient servants_, _DODSON & FOGG_. 

 Mr. Samuel Pickwick. '

So Mr. Pickwick, the general mentor, the philosopher and friend--the manof high moral tone, "born to set the world aright"--the general lecturerof his "followers, " was now in for an action at law of the most awkwardand unpleasant kind. To be philandering with one's landlady! rather lowform this. But what would they say down at Manor Farm? How IsabellaWardle and her sister--and all the girls--would laugh! And the spinsteraunt--_she_ would enjoy it! But there was no help for it. It must befaced. 

Naturally Mr. Pickwick felt uncomfortable, and his first idea was toarrange the matter. This was a sensible course, and he ought at once tohave put the matter into the hands of his friend Perker, with full powersto treat. But no. Mr. Pickwick's vanity and indiscretion made himmeddle in the business behind his solicitor's back, as it where, and withdamaging results to himself--a warning to all such amateurs. It must besaid that Dodson and Fogg's behaviour at the extraordinary visit which hepaid them was marked by a certain propriety. Mr. Pickwick insisted onknowing what were the grounds of action--that is, the details of theevidence against him--in short, their case. They, very correctly, refused to tell him. "The case may be false or it may be true--it may becredible it may be incredible. " But all the same it was a strong case. This was as much as they could tell. Mr. Pickwick could only urge thatif "it were so, he was a most unfortunate man, " on which Dodsonpromptly--"I hope you are, sir, I trust you may be, sir. If you arereally innocent, you are more unfortunate than I had believed any mancould possibly be. "

Mr. Pickwick then rather foolishly asked did he understand they meant togo on with the action--as if they could have been affected by hisdeclaration. "Understand?" was the reply, "that you certainly may"--avery natural speech. 

With some want of professional delicacy and etiquette, Dodson seized theopportunity to "serve" Mr. Pickwick; but they were not a high-class firmand their methods were not high-class. Then an extraordinarilyincredible display followed. His passion broke forth. "_Of all thedisgraceful and rascally proceedings he ever_, _etc. _!" Dodson summonedhis clerks to listen to this gross language, and said, "Perhaps you wouldlike to call us swindlers. " "_You are_, " said Mr. Pickwick. Fogg evenwished him to assault them--and perhaps he would have done so, but forSam, who at last got him away. This was certainly not correct, but howaggravating was Mr. Pickwick! One is rather astonished at theforbearance of this sharp firm. 

Now, had Mr. Pickwick gone straight to his lodgings in Goswell Street andseen Mrs. Bardell, heard her views and claims, had he been told by herthat she had been professionally urged to go to law as she had such astrong case--there might have been some excuse for this violence toDodson and Fogg. But he knew nothing whatever of the matter--knewnothing of the attornies--and in his blind fury gratuitously assumed thatthey had "conspired" to harass him in this way. True, he had overheardhow they had treated poor Ramsey. 

This very _malapropos_ visit of Mr. Pickwick to the firm was, as I said, a mistake and damaged his case. It showed that he was nervous andanxious, and _insecure_. He took nothing by it. There was in truth muchshort-sighted cunning in his ways, which came of his overweening vanity. But this was only one of several attempts he made to worm out somethingto his own advantage. 

Another of Mr. Pickwick's foolish manoeuvres was his sending his man tohis old lodgings to his landlady--ostensibly to fetch away his "things, "when this dialogue passed:

 'Tell Mrs. Bardell she may put a bill up, as soon as she likes. '

 'Wery good, sir, ' replied Mr. Weller; 'anythin' more, sir. '

 'Nothing more, Sam. '

 Mr. Weller stepped slowly to the door, as if he expected something more; slowly opened it, slowly stepped out, and had slowly closed it within a couple of inches, when Mr. Pickwick called out. 

 'Sam. '

 'Sir, ' said Mr. Weller, stepping quickly back, and closing the door behind him. 

 'I have no objection, Sam, to your endeavouring to ascertain how Mrs. Bardell herself seems disposed towards me, and whether it is really probable that this vile and groundless action is to be carried to extremity. _I say_, _I do not object to your doing this_, _if you wish it_, _Sam_, ' said Mr. Pickwick. Sam gave a short nod of intelligence and left the room. 

Now this was very artful on the part of Mr. Pickwick, but it was a veryshallow sort of artfulness, and it was later to recoil on himself. Samof course saw through it at once. It never dawned on this simple-mindedman what use the Plaintiff's solicitors would make of his _demarche_. 

When the subpoenas were served he rushed off to Perker:

 'They have subpoena'd my servant too, ' said Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Sam?' said Perker. 

 Mr. Pickwick replied in the affirmative. 

 'Of course, my dear sir; of course. I knew they would. I could have told _you_ that a month ago. You know, my dear sir, if you _will_ take the management of your affairs into your own hands after intrusting them to your solicitor, you must also take the consequences. ' Here Mr. Perker drew himself up with conscious dignity, and brushed some stray grains of snuff from his shirt frill. 

 'And what do they want him to prove?' asked Mr. Pickwick, after two or three minutes' silence. 

 'That you sent him up to the plaintiff's to make some offer of a compromise, I suppose, ' replied Perker. 'It don't matter much, though; I don't think many counsel could get a great deal out of _him_. '

 'I don't think they could, ' said Mr. Pickwick. 

The minutiae of legal process are prosaic and uninteresting, and it mightseem impossible to invest them with any dramatic interest; but howadmirably has Boz lightened up and coloured the simple incident of anattorney's clerk--a common, vulgar fellow of the lowest type, arriving toserve his subpoenas on the witnesses--all assumed to be hostile. Thescene is full of touches of light comedy. 

 'How de do, sir?' said Mr. Jackson, nodding to Mr. Pickwick. 

 That gentlemen bowed, and looked somewhat surprised for the physiognomy of Mr. Jackson dwelt not in his recollection. 

 'I have called from Dodson and Fogg's, ' said Mr. Jackson, in an explanatory tone. 

 Mr. Pickwick roused at the name. 'I refer you to my attorney, sir: Mr. Perker, of Gray's Inn, ' said he. 'Waiter, show this gentleman out. '

 'Beg your pardon, Mr. Pickwick, ' said Jackson, deliberately depositing his hat on the floor, and drawing from his pocket the strip of parchment. 'But personal service, by clerk or agent, in these cases, you know, Mr. Pickwick--nothing like caution, sir, in all legal forms?'

 Here Mr. Jackson cast his eye on the parchment; and, resting his hands on the table, and looking round with a winning and persuasive, smile, said: 'Now, come; don't let's have no words about such a little matter as this. Which of you gentlemen's name's Snodgrass?'

 At this inquiry Mr. Snodgrass gave such a very undisguised and palpable start, that no further reply was needed. 

 'Ah! I thought so, ' said Mr. Jackson, more affably than before. 'I've got a little something to trouble you with, sir. '

 'Me!' exclaimed Mr. Snodgrass. 

 'It's only a _subpoena_ in Bardell and Pickwick on behalf of the plaintiff, ' replied Jackson, singling out one of the slips of paper, and producing a shilling from his waistcoat pocket. 'It'll come on, in the settens after Term; fourteenth of Febooary, we expect; we've marked it a special jury cause, and it's only ten down the paper. That's yours, Mr. Snodgrass. ' As Jackson said this he presented the parchment before the eyes of Mr. Snodgrass, and slipped the paper and the shilling into his hand. 

 Mr. Tupman had witnessed this process in silent astonishment, when Jackson, turning sharply upon him, said:

 'I think I ain't mistaken when I say your name's Tupman, am I?'

 Mr. Tupman looked at Mr. Pickwick; but, perceiving no encouragement in that gentleman's widely-opened eyes to deny his name, said:

 'Yes, my name _is_ Tupman, sir. '

 'And that other gentleman's Mr. Winkle, I think?' said Jackson. 

 Mr. Winkle faltered out a reply in the affirmative; and both gentlemen were forthwith invested with a slip of paper, and a shilling each, by the dexterous Mr. Jackson. 

 'Now, ' said Jackson, 'I'm affraid you'll think me rather troublesome, but I want somebody else, if it ain't inconvenient. I _have_ Samuel Weller's name here, Mr. Pickwick. '

 'Send my servant here, waiter, ' said Mr. Pickwick. The waiter retired, considerably astonished, and Mr. Pickwick motioned Jackson to a seat. 

 There was a painful pause, which was at length broken by the innocent defendant. 

 'I suppose, sir, ' said Mr. Pickwick, his indignation rising while he spoke; 'I suppose, sir, that it is the intention of your employers to seek to criminate me upon the testimony of my own friends?'

 Mr. Jackson struck his forefinger several times against the left side of his nose, to intimate that he was not there to disclose the secrets of the prison-house, and playfully rejoined:

 'Not knowin', can't say. '

 'For what other reason, sir, ' pursued Mr. Pickwick, 'are these subpoenas served upon them, if not for this?'

 'Very good plant, Mr. Pickwick, ' replied Jackson, slowly shaking his head. 'But it won't do. No harm in trying, but there's little to be got out of me. '

 Here Mr. Jackson smiled once more upon the company, and, applying his left thumb to the tip of his nose, worked a visionary coffee-mill with his right hand: thereby performing a very graceful piece of pantomime (then much in vogue, but now, unhappily, almost obsolete) which was familiarly denominated 'taking a grinder. ' (Imagine a modern solicitor's clerk "Taking a grinder!")

 'No, no, Mr. Pickwick, ' said Jackson, in conclusion; 'Perker's people must guess what we served these subpoenas for. If they can't, they must wait till the action comes on, and then they'll find out. '

 Mr. Pickwick bestowed a look of excessive disgust on his unwelcome visitor, and would probably have hurled some tremendous anathema at the heads of Messrs. Dodson and Fogg, had not Sam's entrance at the instant interrupted him. 

 'Samuel Weller?' said Mr. Jackson, inquiringly. 

 'Vun o' the truest things as you've said for many a long year, ' replied Sam, in a most composed manner. 

 'Here's a subpoena for you, Mr. Weller, ' said Jackson. 

 'What's that in English?' inquired Sam. 

 'Here's the original, ' said Jackson, declining the required explanation. 

 'Which?' said Sam. 

 'This, ' replied Jackson, shaking the parchment. 

 'Oh, that's the 'rig'nal, is it?' said Sam. 'Well, I'm wery glad I've seen the 'rig'nal, 'cos it's a gratifyin' sort o' thing, and eases vun's mind so much. '

 'And here's the shilling, ' said Jackson. 'It's from Dodson and Fogg's. '

 'And it's uncommon handsome o' Dodson and Fogg, as knows so little of me, to come down vith a present, ' said Sam. 'I feel it as a wery high compliment, sir; it's a wery hon'rable thing to them, as they knows how to reward merit werever they meets it. Besides wich, it's affectin to one's feelin's. '

 As Mr. Weller said this, he inflicted a little friction on his right eye-lid, with the sleeve of his coat, after the most approved manner of actors when they are in domestic pathetics. 

 Mr. Jackson seemed rather puzzled by Sam's proceedings; but, as he had served the subpoenas, and had nothing more to say, he made a feint of putting on the one glove which he usually carried in his hand, for the sake of appearances; and returned to the office to report progress. 

Another of Mr. Pickwick's foolish and self-willed proceedings was theinterview with Serjeant Snubbin, which he so positively insisted upon. We may wonder now-a-days would any K. C. Of position have condescended toallow such a proceeding? I fancy it would be thought "irregular:" thoughperhaps _ex gratia_, and from the oddity of the proposal, it might beconceded. 

When Mr. Pickwick called upon him, it turned out that the Serjeant knewnothing whatever of his case; probably cared nothing about it. It wasnot in his line. He perhaps wondered why the old-fashioned lawyer had"retained" him. We learn Parker's reason:

 'Well, we've done everything that's necessary. I have engaged Serjeant Snubbin. '

 'Is he a good man?' inquired Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Good man!' replied Perker; 'bless your heart and soul, my dear sir, Serjeant Snubbin is at the very top of his profession. Gets treble the business of any man in court--engaged in every case. You needn't mention it abroad; but we say--we of the profession--that Serjeant Snubbin leads the court by the nose. '

How foolish was this reasoning can be seen on an instant's reflection. To "lead the court by the nose" is well enough in an argument before ajudge: but here it was more important to lead _a jury_ by the nose, whichBuzfuz knew how to do. Moreover when a counsel has this power, itusually operates on a special judge and his colleagues; but who couldguarantee that Snubbin's special judge would try the case. As it turnedout, the Chief Justice fell sick before the day, and Mr. JusticeStareleigh unexpectedly took the case. He as it proved was anything but"led by the nose. " Perker indeed, summed up the whole weakness of thecase in a single sentence:

 'They have subpoena'd my three friends, ' said Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Ah! of course they would, ' replied Perker. 'Important witnesses; saw you in a delicate situation. '

 'But she fainted of her own accord, ' said Mr. Pickwick. 'She threw herself into my arms. '

 'Very likely, my dear sir, ' replied Perker; 'very likely and very natural. Nothing more so, my dear sir, nothing. _But who's to prove it_?'

A suggestion, we are told, that rather "staggered" Mr. Pickwick. 

Within ten minutes after he had received the assurance that the thing wasimpossible, he was conducted by his solicitors into the outer office ofthe great Serjeant Snubbin himself. 

 It was an uncarpeted room of tolerable dimensions, with a large writing table drawn up near the fire, the baize top of which had long since lost all claim to its original hue of green, and had gradually grown grey with dust and age, except where all traces of its natural colour were obliterated by ink-stains. Upon the table were numerous little bundles of papers tied with red tape; and behind it, sat an elderly clerk, whose sleek appearance and heavy gold watch-chain presented imposing indications of the extensive and lucrative practice of Mr. Serjeant Snubbin. 

 'Is the Serjeant in his room, Mr. Mallard?' inquired Perker, offering his box with all imaginable courtesy. 

 'Yes, he is, ' was the reply, 'but he's very busy. Look here; not an opinion given yet, on any one of these cases; and an expedition fee paid with all of them. ' The clerk smiled as he said this, and inhaled the pinch of snuff with a zest which seemed to be compounded of a fondness for snuff and a relish for fees. 

 'Something like practice that, ' said Perker. 

 'Yes, ' said the barrister's clerk, producing his own box, and offering it with the greatest cordiality; 'and the best of it is, that as nobody alive except myself can read the Serjeant's writing, they are obliged to wait for the opinions, when he has given them, till I have copied 'em, ha--ha--ha!'

 'Which makes good for we know who, besides the Serjeant, and draws a little more out of his clients, eh?' said Perker; 'Ha, ha, ha!' At this the Serjeant's clerk laughed again--not a noisy boisterous laugh, but a silent, internal chuckle, which Mr. Pickwick disliked to hear. When a man bleeds inwardly, it is a dangerous thing for himself; but when he laughs inwardly, it bodes no good to other people. 

 'You haven't made me out that little list of the fees that I'm in your debt, have you?' said Perker. 

 'No, I have not, ' replied the clerk. 

 'I wish you would, ' said Perker. 'Let me have them, and I'll send you a cheque. But I suppose you're too busy pocketing the ready money, to think of the debtors, eh? ha, ha, ha!' This sally seemed to tickle the clerk, amazingly, and he once more enjoyed a little quiet laugh to himself. 

 'But, Mr. Mallard, my dear friend, ' said Perker, suddenly recovering his gravity, and drawing the great man's great man into a corner, by the lappel of his coat, 'you must persuade the Serjeant to see me, and my client here. '

 'Come, come, ' said the clerk, 'that's not bad either. See the Serjeant! come, that's too absurd. ' Notwithstanding the absurdity of the proposal, however, the clerk allowed himself to be gently drawn beyond the hearing of Mr. Pickwick; and after a short conversation conducted in whispers, walked softly down a little dark passage and disappeared into the legal luminary's sanctum, from whence he shortly returned on tiptoe, and informed Mr. Perker and Mr. Pickwick that the Serjeant had been prevailed upon, in violation of all his established rules and customs, to admit them at once. 

 The Serjeant was writing when his clients entered; he bowed abstractedly when Mr. Pickwick was introduced by his solicitor; and then, motioning them to a seat, put his pen carefully in the inkstand, nursed his left leg, and waited to be spoken to. 

 'Mr. Pickwick is the defendant in Bardell and Pickwick, Serjeant Snubbin, ' said Perker. 

 'I am retained in that, am I?' said the Serjeant. 

 'You are, Sir, ' replied Perker. 

 The Serjeant nodded his head, and waited for something else. 

 'Mr. Pickwick was anxious to call upon you, Serjeant Snubbin, ' said Perker, 'to state to you, before you entered upon the case, that he denies there being any ground or pretence whatever for the action against him; and that unless he came into court with clean hands, and without the most conscientious conviction that he was right in resisting the plaintiff's demand, he would not be there at all. I believe I state your views correctly; do I not, my dear Sir?' said the little man, turning to Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Quite so, ' replied that gentleman. 

 Mr. Serjeant Snubbin unfolded his glasses, raised them to his eyes; and, after looking at Mr. Pickwick for a few seconds with great curiosity, turned to Mr. Perker, and said, smiling slightly as he spoke--

 'Has Mr. Pickwick a strong case?'

 The attorney shrugged his shoulders. 

 'Do you purpose calling witnesses?'

 'No. '

 The smile on the Serjeant's countenance became more defined; he rocked his leg with increased violence, and, throwing himself back in his easy-chair, coughed dubiously. 

 These tokens of the Serjeant's presentiments on the subject, slight as they were, were not lost on Mr. Pickwick. He settled the spectacles, through which he had attentively regarded such demonstrations of the barrister's feeling as he had permitted himself to exhibit, more firmly on his nose; and said with great energy, and in utter disregard of all Mr. Perker's admonitory winkings and frownings--

 'My wishing to wait upon you for such a purpose as this, Sir, appears, I have no doubt, to a gentleman who sees so much of these matters as you must necessarily do, a very extraordinary circumstance. '

 The Serjeant tried to look gravely at the fire, but the smile came back again. 

 [Picture: Mr. Pickwick expounds his case to his Counsel]

 'Gentlemen of your profession, Sir, ' continued Mr. Pickwick, 'see the worst side of human nature--all its disputes, all its ill-will and bad blood, rise up before you. You know from your experience of juries (I mean no disparagement to you or them) how much depends upon _effect_; and you are apt to attribute to others, a desire to use, for purposes of deception and self-interest, the very instruments which you, in pure honesty and honour of purpose, and with a laudable desire to do your utmost for your client, know the temper and worth of so well, from constantly employing them yourselves. I really believe that to this circumstance may be attributed the vulgar but very general notion of your being, as a body, suspicious, distrustful, and over-cautious. Conscious as I am, Sir, of the disadvantage of making such a declaration to you, under such circumstances, I have come here, because I wish you distinctly to understand, as my friend Mr. Perker has said, that I am innocent of the falsehood laid to my charge; and although I am very well aware of the inestimable value of your assistance, Sir, I must beg to add, that unless you sincerely believe this, I would rather be deprived of the aid of your talents than have the advantage of them. '

 Long before the close of this address, which we are bound to say was of a very prosy character for Mr. Pickwick, the Serjeant had relapsed into a state of abstraction. 

Now the Serjeant might at once have replied to all this, that theinnocence or guilt of a client had nothing to do with him, that his usewas merely to secure a client such benefit and advantage as the lawentitled him to: that a judge and jury would decide the point ofinnocence. Boz himself evidently shared this popular delusion, and seemsto be speaking by Mr. Pickwick's mouth. The sagacious Serjeant, however, took no notice whatever of the appeal, but simply asked "who was withhim" in the case. Mr. Phunky was sent for, and asked by his leader "totake Mr. Pickwick away" and "hear anything he may wish to communicate. "The party was then bowed out. 

The truth was, Mr. Pickwick's attorney was too much of a social characterand of the "old family solicitor" pattern for so critical a case. Thecounsel he "instructed" were unsuitable. Serjeant Snubbin was anoverworked "Chamber lawyer, " whose whole time and experience was given tofurnishing "opinions" on tangled cases; so pressed was he that he took"expedition fees" to give certain cases priority: an illegitimatepractice that now the Bar Committee would scarcely tolerate. What couldsuch a man know of nisi prius trials, of cross-examining or handlingwitnesses? It is enough to give his portrait, as supplied by the author:

 [Picture: Serjeant Snubbin, K. C. ]

 Mr. Serjeant Snubbin was a lantern-faced, sallow-complexioned man, of about five-and-forty, or--as the novels say--he might be fifty. He had that _dull-looking boiled eye_ which is often to be seen in the heads of people who have applied themselves during many years to a weary and laborious course of study; and which would have been sufficient, without the additional eye-glass which dangled from a broad black riband round his neck, to warn a stranger that he was very near-sighted. His hair was thin and weak, which was partly attributable to his having never devoted much time to its arrangement, and partly to his having worn for five-and-twenty years the forsenic wig which hung on a block beside him. The marks of hair powder on his coat collar, and the ill-washed and worse tied white neckerchief round his throat, showed that he had not found leisure since he left the court to make any alteration in his dress: while the slovenly style of the remainder of his costume warranted the inference that his personal appearance would not have been very much improved if he had. Books of practice, heaps of papers, and opened letters, were scattered over the table, without any attempt at order or arrangement; the furniture of the room was old and ricketty; the doors of the bookcase were rotting in their hinges; the dust flew out from the carpet in little clouds at every step; the blinds were yellow with age and dirt; the state of everything in the room showed, with a clearness not to be mistaken, that Mr. Serjeant Snubbin was far too much occupied with his professional pursuits to take any great heed or regard of his personal comforts. 

It was a characteristic feature of the slowness of legal process in thosedays that though the notice of action was sent on August the 28th, 1827, the case was not ripe for trial until February 14th of the nextyear--nearly six months having elapsed. It is difficult to speculate asto what this long delay was owing. There were only two witnesses whoseevidence had to be briefed--Mrs. Cluppins and Mrs. Sanders--and they wereat hand. It is odd, by the way, that they did not think of examininglittle Tommy Bardell, the only one who actually witnessed the proceeding. True, he was of tender years--about eight or ten--and the son of thePlaintiff, but he must have "known the nature of an oath. "

THE TRIAL. 

At last the momentous morning came round. It was the fourteenth ofFebruary, Valentine's Day, 1828--one not of good omen for the Plaintiff. {26} The Defendant's party was rather gloomy at breakfast, when Perker, by wave of encouraging his client, uttered some _dicta_ as to the chancesof the Jury having had a good breakfast "Discontented or hungry jurymen, my dear Sir, always find for the Plaintiff. " "Bless my heart, " said Mr. Pickwick, looking very blank, "What do they do that for!"

The party then got into hackney coaches and was driven to the Guildhall, where the case was to be tried at ten o'clock precisely. 

 [Picture: Exterior of the Guildhall Court. --Now City Museum]

 [Picture: Interior of the Guildhall, Court, circa 1830. (From an original drawing by T. Allen. )]

How dramatic Boz has made the "calling of the Jury, " which might bethought an uninteresting and prosaic operation enough. It was a specialjury, which entailed one guinea per head extra expense on Mr. Pickwick. He had, of course, asked for it: but Dodson and Fogg would have been wellcontent with and perhaps even have preferred a common jury. Now-a-days, special jurors, though summoned largely, have to be almost coerced intoattending. A fine of ten pounds is imposed, but this is almostinvariably remitted on affidavit. The common jurors, moreover, do notshow the reluctance to "serve" of Groffin, the chemist. A guinea is notto be despised. There are, as it were, professional common jurors whohang about the Courts in the hope of being thus called as "understudies. "On this occasion what was called a _Tales_ was prayed for, and two commonjurors were pressed into the service: and "a greengrocer and a chemistwere caught directly. "

It is impossible to say too much of the completeness with which the legalscene is put forward. Everything is dealt with. We have perfectsketches of the judge, the ushers, the jury, the counsel on the case, thewitnesses, the barristers, the attorneys; we have the speeches, themethods of examination and cross-examination. 

There is nothing better or more life-like than the sketch of the court inthe chill morning, and before the actors came on the scene--theinimitable description of the idle barristers hanging about "the Bar ofEngland, " which is accurate to this hour. 

Few could describe effectively the peculiar appearance of a crowd ofbarristers assembled in a Court of Law. They are a type apart, and theirodd headgear accentuates all the peculiarities of their faces. No onehas, however, succeeded so well as Boz in touching off theirpeculiarities. This sort of histrionic guise and bearing is assumed witha view to impose on his friends and the public, to suggest an idea thatthey have much or at least something to do. 

 'And that, ' said Mr. Pickwick, pointing to a couple of enclosed seats on his right, 'that's where the jurymen sit, is it not?'

 'The identical place, my dear Sir, ' replied Perker, tapping the lid of his snuff-box. 

 Mr. Pickwick stood up in a state of great agitation and took a glance at the court. There were already a pretty large sprinkling of spectators in the gallery, and a numerous muster of gentlemen in wigs in the barristers' seats, who presented, as a body, all that pleasing and extensive variety of nose and whisker for which the bar of England is so justly celebrated. Such of the gentlemen as had got a brief to carry, carried it in as conspicuous a manner as possible, and occasionally scratched their noses therewith, to impress the fact more strongly on the observation of the spectators. 

One of the happiest descriptions is surely that of the binding of lawbooks. A law library is the most repulsive and uninteresting thing inthe world. The colour of the leather is unhealthy and disagreeable, andthe necessary shading is secured at the expense of grace. Bozcharacterises it as 'that under-done pie crust. '

 Other gentlemen, who had no briefs to show, carried under their arms goodly octavos, with a red label behind, and that under-done-pie-crust-coloured cover, which is technically known as "law calf. " Others, who had neither briefs nor books, thrust their hands into their pockets, and looked as wise as they conveniently could; while others, again, moved here and there with great restlessness and earnestness of manner, content to awaken thereby the admiration and astonishment of the uninitiated stranger. The whole, to the great wonderment of Mr. Pickwick, were divided into little groups, who were chatting and discussing the news of the day in the most unfeeling manner possible--just as if no trial at all were coming on. 

 A bow from Mr. Phunky, as he entered, and took his seat behind the row appropriated to the King's Counsel, attracted Mr. Pickwick's attention; and he had scarcely returned it, when Mr. Serjeant Snubbin appeared, followed by Mr. Mallard, who half hid the Serjeant behind a large crimson bag, which he placed on his table, and after shaking hands with Perker, withdrew. Then there entered two or three more Serjeants, and among them, one with a fat body and a red face, who nodded in a friendly manner to Mr. Serjeant Snubbin, and said it was a fine morning. 

 'Who's that red-faced man, who said it was a fine morning and nodded to our counsel?' whispered Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz, ' replied Perker. 'He's opposed to us; he leads on the other side. That gentleman behind him is Mr. Skimpin, his junior. '

 Mr. Pickwick was just on the point of inquiring, with great abhorrence of the man's cold-blooded villainy, how Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz, who was counsel for the opposite party, dared to presume to tell Mr. Serjeant Snubbin, who was counsel for him, that it was a fine morning, --when he was interrupted by a general rising of the barristers, and a loud cry of 'Silence!' from the officers of the court. Looking round, he found that this was caused by the entrance of the Judge. 

On reaching the Court, Perker said, "put Mr. Pickwick's friends in thestudents' box. Mr. Pickwick had better sit by me. " This usefulprovision for the instruction of legal probationers has fallen intodesuetude--no place is reserved for the students now-a-days. LordCampbell describes the custom and recalls an incident that occurred whenhe was sitting in the students' box, close to the Bench. 

There were some matters of procedure which have since been changed--suchas Mr. Skimpin "calling for" Winkle, and the latter answering. This isnow done by an Officer of the Court. Skimpin also asks Winkle his name, as a first question, though he had been sworn and had given it. And the_mal-entendu_ as to "Daniel Nathaniel" could not then have occurred, asthe Officer would have obtained the name correctly. Another unusualthing was that Buzfuz, after his long and rather exhausting speech, should have examined the first witness. Now-a-days the junior would dothis. We may note that at this time it was always "my Lord, " and "yourLordship, " with the full natural sound--we had not yet got to the clipped"M'lud, '" and "your Ludship. " Perhaps this form _was_ actually used bythe Counsel but was not noticed by Boz, or seemed to him the right thing. The King's Counsel were behind and could stoop down to consult theirsolicitors. 

This minute observation and particularity of Boz is further shown in hisnoting the very places where the Attorneys sat, and which he describes. They had the seats next the table:

"You are quite right, " said Buzfuz later on, answering the whisper ofDodson and Fogg, after Sam's awkward revelation. How often have we seenthese hasty communications, which are not without their dramatic effect. 

THE JUDGE. 

Mr. Pickwick, unfortunate in his Counsel, his Solicitor, his Jury--one ofprejudiced tradesmen--was also to be unlucky in the Judge who tried hiscase. No doubt Perker had comforted him: "no matter how it goes, howeverunfair Buzfuz may be, we have a judge to hold the scales fair and keepthe jury straight. The Lord Chief Justice of the Common Pleas, the RightHon. Sir NICHOLAS CONYNGHAM TINDAL is a man of immense reputation at theBar. We are most fortunate in having him. " Judge then of thedisappointment when on coming to court it was found that Sir StephenGaselee was to take the case "owing to the absence of the Chief Justice, occasioned by indisposition. " (I protest that at times one does not knowwhether we are following out a course of real events, or tracing theincidents of a fiction, so wonderfully does Boz make his fiction blendwith reality. ) This was a serious blow. Tindal was an admirable judge. Did not his chroniclers write of him: "His sagacity, impartiality andplain sense, his industry and clear sightedness made him an admiration ofnon-professional spectators: while among lawyers he was very highlyesteemed _for his invariable kindness to all who appeared before him_. He retained to the last their respect and affection. " With such a manpresiding Sergeant Buzfuz's eccentric violence and abuse of the defendantwould have been restrained ("having the outward appearance of a man andnot of a monster. ") Mr. Skimpin's gross insinuations, to wit, thatWinkle was "telegraphing" to his friend, would have been summarily putdown, and all "bullying" checked; more, he would have calmly keptCounsel's attention to the issue. This perfect impartiality would havemade him show to the Jury how little evidence there was to support theplaintiff's case. Instead came this unlucky indisposition: and his placewas taken by "my Brother Gaselee:" with what results Mr. Pickwick was tolearn disastrously. 

It is curious, however, that the Chief Justice, in spite of hisindisposition, should still be associated with the case; for he had triedthe momentous case of Norton _v. _ Melbourne, and had heard there lettersread, which were parodied in the "chops and tomato sauce" correspondence, so Boz had him well before him. The case had to be tried at theGuildhall Sessions; so a fair and rational judge would have spoilt allsport. Further, as Boz had seen the fairness and dignity of the ChiefJustice he was naturally reluctant to exhibit him unfavorably. The onlything was to make the Chief Justice become suddenly "indisposed, " andhave his place taken by a grotesque judge. 

The Judge who was to try the case, Mr. Justice Stareleigh, as is wellknown, was drawn from Sir Stephen Gaselee, of whose name Stareleigh is asort of synonym. Serjeant Gaselee was once well known in theprosecutions directed against Radicals and so-called Reformers, but_Pickwick_ has given him a greater reputation. The baiting he receivedfrom patriotic advocates may have inflamed his temper and made himirritable. He is described by one author, in a most humorous, ifpersonal fashion. He was "a most particularly short man, and so fat thathe seemed all face and waistcoat. He rolled in upon two little turnedlegs, and having bobbed gravely to the bar who bobbed gravely to him, puthis little legs under the table, when all you could see of him was twoqueer little eyes, one broad, pink face, and somewhere about half of abig and very comical-looking wig. " All through he is shown as arrogantand incapable, and also as making some absurd mistakes. 

It will be a surprise to most people to learn that this picture is nomore than an amusing caricature, and that the judge was really a personof high character. He is described as "a very painstaking, uprightjudge, and, in his private capacity, a worthy and benevolent man. " Thus, Mr. Croker, who, however, supplies a sound reason for his being thesubject of such satire. "With many admirable qualities both of head andheart, he had made himself a legitimate object of ridicule by hisexplosions on the Bench. " Under such conditions, the Bar, the suitorsand the public had neither the wish nor the opportunity to search forextenuating excuses in his private life. They suffered enough from the"explosions" and that was all that concerned them. He had been fourteenyears on the Bench, and, like Stareleigh, belonged to the Common Pleas. He was suffering too from infirmities, particularly from deafness, andappears to have misapprehended statements in the same grotesque fashionthat he mistook Winkle's name. 

Boz's fashion of burlesque, by the way, is happily shown in his treatmentof this topic. Another would have been content with "Daniel, " the simplemisapprehension. "Nathaniel, sir, " says Winkle. "Daniel--any othername?" "Nathaniel, sir--my lord, I mean. " "_Nathaniel Daniel_--_orDaniel Nathaniel_?" "No, my lord, only Nathaniel, not Daniel at all. "

"What did you tell me it was Daniel for, then, sir?"

"I didn't, my lord. "

"You did, sir. _How could I have got Nathaniel in my notes_, _unless youtold me so_, _sir_?"

How admirable is this. The sly satire goes deeper, as Judges, under lessgross conditions, have often made this illogical appeal to "my notes. "

Though not gifted with oratorical powers which were likely to gain himemployment as a leader, Gaselee's reputation for legal knowledge soonrecommended him to a judge's place. He was accordingly selected on July1st, 1824, to fill a vacancy in the Court of Common Pleas. In that Courthe sat for nearly fourteen years "with the character of a painstakingjudge, and in his private capacity as a worthy and benevolent man. " ThusMr. Foss, F. S. A. 

The reader will have noted the Judge's severity to poor Groffin, thechemist, who had pleaded the danger of his boy mistaking oxalic acid forEpsom salts. Could it be that the Judge's experience as the son of aprovincial doctor, had shown what class of man was before him? Later, unexpectedly, we learn that the Judge was a steady member for fourteenyears of the Royal Humane Society, of which institution he was also aVice-President. 

But we now come to a most extraordinary thing--the result of the youngauthor's telling and most sarcastic portrait of the irascible littlejudge. It is curious that Forster, while enumerating various instancesof Boz's severe treatment of living persons, as a sort of chastisementfor their defects of manner or character, seems not to have thought ofthis treatment of the judge--and passes it by. Nor did he notice theprompt result that followed on the sketch. The report of the trialappeared in the March number, 1837--and we are told, the luckless judgeretired from the Bench, shortly after the end of Hilary Term, that is inApril or the beginning of May. We may assume that the poor gentlemancould not endure the jests of his _confreres_ or the scarcely concealedtittering of the Barristers, all of whom had of course devoured andenjoyed the number. We may say that the learned Sergeant Buzfuz was notlikely to be affected in any way by _his_ picture; it may indeed haveadded to his reputation. I confess to some sympathy for the poor oldjudge who was thus driven from the Bench. Sam Foote was much given tothis sort of personal attack, and made the lives of some of his victimswretched. Boz, however, seems to have felt himself called upon to actthus as public executioner on two occasions only. After the fall of thejudge in June, 1837, he wanted a model for a tyrannical magistrate in_Oliver Twist_--and Mr. Laing, the Hatton Garden Magistrate--a harsh, ferocious personage, at once occurred to him. He wrote accordingly toone of his friends that he wished to be _smuggled_ into his office somemorning to study him. This "smuggling" of course meant the placing himwhere he would not be observed--as a magistrate knowing his "sketches"might recognise him. "I know the man perfectly well" he added. So hedid, for he forgot that he had introduced him already in _Pickwick_ asNupkins--whose talk is exactly alike, in places almost word for word tothat of "Mr. Fang. "

These palliations, Boz, a young fellow of three and twenty or so, did notpause to weigh. He only saw a testy, red-faced old fellow with goggleeyes, and seventy-four years old, and past his work. His infirmitiesalready made him incapable of carrying through the business of the Courtas the mistake, "Is it Daniel Nathaniel or Nathaniel Daniel?" shows. Itis curious, however, that this weakness of misapprehending names isdescribed of another judge, Arabin--a strange grotesque. Theodore Hookgives an amusing specimen in his Gilbert Gurney. 

From the general description in the text, it is evident Stareleigh wasthe prey of gouty affections--which swelled him into grotesque shape, andhe found himself unequal to the office. He died two years after hisretirement at No. 13, Montagu Place, Russell Square; so that the Judge inBardell _v. _ Pickwick was living close to Perker the Attorney in the samecase. Here we seem to mix up the fictional and the living characters, but this is the law of _Pickwick_--the confines between the two worldsbeing quite confused or broken down. The late commander of our forces inChina, Sir A. Gaselee, is of this family. It should be remembered, however, when we think of this judge's frowardness, that judges in thosetimes were dictatorial and carried matters with a high hand. There wereoften angry conflicts between them, and members of the Bar, andStareleigh was really not so very tyrannical. He did what so many judgesdo--took a side from the first, and had decided in his own mind that Mr. Pickwick could not possibly have a case. That curious form of addressfrom the Bench is now no longer heard--"who is with you, _BrotherBuzfuz_?" Judges and sergeants were then common members of theGuild--both wore the "coif. "

THE COURT. 

When the swearing of the jury is going on, how good, and how natural isthe scene with the unfortunate chemist. 

 'Answer to your names, gentlemen that you may be sworn, ' said the gentleman in black. 'Richard Upwitch. '

 'Here, ' said the greengrocer. 

 'Thomas Groffin. '

 'Here, ' said the chemist. 

 'Take the book, gentlemen. You shall well and truly try--'

 'I beg this court's pardon, ' said the chemist, who was a tall, thin, yellow-visaged man, 'but I hope this court will excuse my attendance. '

 'On what grounds, sir?' replied Mr. Justice Stareleigh. 

 'I have no assistant, my Lord, ' said the chemist. 

 'I can't help that, sir, ' replied Mr. Justice Stareleigh. 'You should hire one. '

 'I can't afford it, my Lord, ' rejoined the chemist. 

 'Then you ought to be able to afford it, sir, ' said the judge, reddening; for Mr. Justice Stareleigh's temper bordered on the irritable, and brooked not contradiction. 

 'I know I _ought_ to do, if I got on as well as I deserved, but I don't, my Lord, ' answered the chemist. 

 'Swear the gentleman, ' said the judge, peremptorily. 

 The officer had got no farther than the 'You shall well and truly try, ' when he was again interrupted by the chemist. 

 'I am to be sworn, my Lord, am I?' said the chemist. 

 'Certainly, sir, ' replied the testy little judge. 

 'Very well, my Lord, ' replied the chemist in a resigned manner. 'There'll be murder before this trial's over; that's all. Swear me, if you please, sir;' and sworn the chemist was, before the judge could find words to utter. 

 'I merely wanted to observe, my Lord, ' said the chemist, taking his seat with great deliberation, 'that I've left nobody but an errand boy in my shop. He is a very nice boy, my Lord, but he is not acquainted with drugs; and I know that the prevailing impression on his mind is, that Epsom salts means oxalic acid; and syrup of senna, laudanum. That's all, my Lord. ' With this, the tall chemist composed himself into a comfortable attitude, and, assuming a pleasant expression of countenance, appeared to have prepared himself for the worst. 

One who was born in the same year as Boz, but who was to live for thirtyyears after him, Henry Russell--composer and singer of "The IvyGreen"--was, when a youth, apprenticed to a chemist, and when about tenyears old, that is five years before Bardell _v. _ Pickwick, was left incharge of the shop. He discovered just in time that he had served acustomer who had asked for Epsom salts with poison sufficient to killfifty people. On this he gave up the profession. I have little doubtthat he told this story to his friend a dozen years later, and that itwas on Boz's mind when he wrote. Epsom salts was the drug mentioned inboth instances. 

It must be said that even in our day a defendant for Breach, with Mr. Pickwick's story and surroundings, would have had small chance with acity jury. They saw before them a benevolent-looking Lothario, of aQuaker-like air, while all the witnesses against him were his three mostintimate friends and his own man. 

We have, of course, testy judges now, who may be "short" in manner, but Ithink it can be affirmed that no judge of our day could behave to counselor witnesses as Mr. Justice Stareleigh did. It is, in fact, now the tonefor a judge to affect a sort of polished courtesy, and to impart a sortof light gaiety to the business he is transacting. All asperity andtyrannous rudeness is held to be out of place. Hectoring and bullying ofwitnesses will not be tolerated. The last exhibition was perhaps that ofthe late Dr. Kenealy in the Tichborne case. 

All the swearing of jurymen before the court, with the intervention ofthe judge, has been got rid of. The Master of the Court, or Chief Clerk, has a number of interviews--at his public desk--with importantindividuals, bringing him signed papers. These are excuses of somesort--medical certificates, etc. --with a view to be "let off" serving. Some--most, perhaps--are accepted, some refused. A man of wealth andimportance can have little difficulty. Of course this would be denied bythe jurists: but, somehow, the great guns contrive not to attend. At teno'clock this officer proceeds to swear the jury, which is happilyaccomplished by the time the judge enters. 

SERJEANT BUZFUZ. 

Mr. Pickwick, considering the critical nature of his case, was certainlyunfortunate in his solicitor, as well as in the Counsel selected by hissolicitors. The other side were particularly favoured in this matter. They had a pushful bustling "wide-awake" firm of solicitors, who let nota point escape. Sergeant Buzfuz was exactly the sort of advocate for thecase--masterful, unscrupulous, eloquent, and with a singularly ingeniousfaculty for putting everything on his client's side in the best light, and his adversary's in the worst. He could "tear a witness to pieces, "and turn him inside out. His junior, Skimpin, was glib, ready-armed atall points, and singularly adroit in "making a hare" of any witness whofell into his hands, _teste_ Winkle. He had all the professional devicesfor dealing with a witness's answers, and twisting them to his purpose, at his fingers' ends. He was the Wontner or Ballantyne of his day. Mr. Pickwick's "bar" was quite outmatched. They were rather a feeble lot, too respectable altogether, and really not familiar with this line ofbusiness. Even the judge was against them from the very start, so Mr. Pickwick had very poor chances indeed. All this was due to thatold-fashioned and rather incapable "Family Solicitor" Perker. 

 [Picture: Serjeant Buzfuz, K. C. ]

Serjeant Buzfuz is known the world all over, at least wherever English isknown. I myself was once startled in a fashionable West End church tohear a preacher, when emphasizing the value and necessity of Prayer, andthe certainty with which it is responded to, use this illustration: "AsSerjeant Buzfuz said to Sam Weller, '_There is little to do and plenty toget_. '" Needless to say, an amused smile, if not a titter, passed roundthe congregation. But it is the Barrister who most appreciates thelearned Serjeant. For the topics he argued and his fashion of arguingthem, bating a not excessive exaggeration, comes home to them all. Nay, they must have a secret admiration, and fondly think how excellently wellsuch and such topics are put, and how they must have told with a jury. 

Buzfuz, it is now well known, was drawn from a leading serjeant of hisday, Serjeant Bompas, K. C. Not so long since I was sitting by Bompas'sson, the present Judge Bompas, at dinner, and a most agreeable causeur hewas. Not only did Boz sketch the style and fashion of the serjeant, butit is clear that Phiz drew the figure and features. 

"I am the youngest son of Serjeant Bompas, " Judge Bompas writes to me, "and have never heard it doubted that the name Buzfuz was taken from myfather who was at that time considered a most successful advocate. Ithink he may have been chosen for the successful advocate because he wasso successful: but I have never been able to ascertain that there was anyother special resemblance. I do not remember my father myself: he diedwhen I was eight years old. But I am told I am like him in face. He wastall (five feet ten inches) and a large man, very popular, and veryexcitable in his cases, so that I am told that Counsel against him usedto urge him, out of friendship, not to get so agitated. A connection ofmine who knew him well, went over to hear Charles Dickens read the TrialScene, to see if he at all imitated him in voice or manner, but told methat he did not do so at all. I think, therefore, that having chosen hisname, as a writer might now that of Sir Charles Russell, he then drew ageneral type of barrister, as he thought it might be satirised. Myfather, like myself, was on the Western Circuit and leader of it at thetime of his death. "

"I had a curious episode happen to me once. A client wrote to apply tothe court to excuse a juror on the ground that he was a chemist and hadno assistant who understood the drugs. It was not till I made theapplication and the Court began to laugh that I remembered the PickwickTrial. I believe the application was quite bona fide, and not at all animitation of it. " An interesting communication from one who might bestyled "Buzfuz's son;" and, as Judge Bompas alludes to his own likenessto his sire, I may add that the likeness to the portrait in the courtscene, is very striking indeed. There is the same fullness of face, thelarge features. Buzfuz was certainly a counsel of power and ability, andI think lawyers will admit he managed Mrs. Bardell's case with muchadroitness. His speech, besides being a sort of satirical abstract ofthe unamiable thundering boisterousness addressed to juries in suchcases, is one of much ability. He makes the most of every topic that hethought likely to "tell" on a city jury. We laugh heartily at hiswould-be solemn and pathetic passages, but these are little exaggerated. Buzfuz's statement is meant to show how counsel, quite legitimately, canbring quite innocent acts to the support of their case by marshallingthem in suspicious order, and suggesting that they had a connection withthe charge made. Many a client thus becomes as bewildered as Mr. Pickwick was, on seeing his own harmless proceedings assuming quite aguilty complexion. 

Serjeant Buzfuz-Bompas died at the age of fifty-three, at his house inPark Road, Regents Park, on February 29th, 1844. He was then, comparatively, a young man, and must have had ability to have attainedhis position so early. He was called to the Bar in 1815, and began asSerjeant in 1827, in Trinity Term, only a year or so before the famouscase was tried. 

So dramatic is the whole "Trial" in its action and characters, that it isalmost fit for the stage as it stands. There have been a great number ofversions, one by the author's son, Charles "the Younger, " one by Mr. Hollingshead, and so on. It is a favorite piece for charitable benefits, and a number of well-known performers often volunteer to figure as"Gentlemen of the Jury. " Buzfuz has been often played by Mr. Toole, buthis too farcical methods scarcely enhanced the part. The easiness ofcomedy is essential. That sound player Mr. James Fernander is the bestBuzfuz that I have seen. 

There is a French translation of _Pickwick_, in which the general spiritof the "Trial" is happily conveyed. Thus Mr. Phunky's name is given as"M. Finge, " which the little judge mistakes for "M. Singe. " Buzfuz'sspeech too is excellent, especially his denouncing the Defendant's comingwith his chops "_et son ignoble bassinoire_" i. E. , warming pan. 

THE OPENING SPEECH. 

Buzfuz's great speech is one of the happiest parodies in the language. Never was the forensic jargon and treatment so humorously set forth--andthis because of the perfect _sincerity_ and earnestness with which it wasdone. There is none of the far-fetched, impossible exaggeration--theform of burlesque which Theodore Hook or Albert Smith might haveattempted. It is, in fact, a real speech, which might have beendelivered to a dull-headed audience without much impairing credibility. Apart from this it is a most effective harangue and most plausiblestatement of the Plaintiff's case. 

A little professional touch, which is highly significant as part of thepantomine, and which Boz made very effective at the reading, was theSerjeant's dramatic preparation for his speech. "Having whispered toDodson and conferred briefly with Fogg, _he pulled his gown over hisshoulders_, _settled his wig_, and addressed the Jury. " Who has not seenthis bit of business?

Again, Juries may have noted that the Junior as he rises to speak, mumbles something that is quite inaudible, and which nobody attends to. This is known as "opening the pleadings. "

 The ushers again called silence, and Mr. Skimpin proceeded to 'open the case;' and the case appeared to have very little inside it when he had opened it, for he kept such particulars as he knew, completely to himself, and sat down, after a lapse of three minutes, leaving the jury in precisely the same advanced stage of wisdom as they were in before. 

 Serjeant Buzfuz then rose with all the majesty and dignity which the grave nature of the proceedings demanded, and having whispered to Dodson, and conferred briefly with Fogg, pulled his gown over his shoulders, settled his wig, and addressed the jury. 

A most delightful legal platitude, as one might call it, is to be foundin the opening of the learned Sergeant's speech. It is a familiar, transparent thing, often used to impose on the Jury. As Boz says ofanother topic, "Counsel often begins in this way because it makes thejury think what sharp fellows they must be. " "You have heard from mylearned friend, gentlemen, " continued the Serjeant, well knowing thatfrom the learned friend alluded to they had heard just nothing at all, "you have heard from my learned friend, that this is an action for Breachof Promise of Marriage, in which the damages are laid at 1, 500 pounds. But you have _not heard from my learned friend_, _inasmuch as it did notlie within my learned friend's province to tell you_, what are the factsand circumstances of the case. " This rich bit of circumlocution issimple nonsense, in rotund phrase, and meant to suggest the imposingmajesty of legal process. The Jury knew perfectly beforehand what theywere going to try: but were to be impressed by the magnifying agency oflegal processes, and would be awe stricken accordingly. The passage, "inasmuch as it did not lie within my learned friend's province to tellyou, " is a delightful bit of cant. In short, the Jury was thus admittedto the secret legal arena, and into community with the learned friendsthemselves, and were persuaded that they were very sharp fellows indeed. What pleasant satire is here, on the mellifluous "openings" of Counsel, the putting a romantic gloss on the most prosaic incidents. 

A sucking Barrister might well study this speech of Buzfuz as a guide tothe conducting of a case, and above all of rather a "shaky" one. Notless excellent is his smooth and plausible account of Mrs. Bardell'ssetting up in lodging letting. He really makes it "interesting. " Onethinks of some fluttering, helpless young widow, setting out in thebattle of life. 

He describes the poor innocent lady putting a bill in her window, "andlet me entreat the attention of the Jury to the wording of thisdocument--'Apartments furnished for a single gentleman!' Mrs. Bardell'sopinions of the opposite sex, gentlemen, were derived from a longcontemplation of the inestimable qualities of her lost husband. She hadno fear--she had no distrust--she had no suspicion--all was confidenceand reliance. 'Mr. Bardell, ' said the widow: 'Mr. Bardell was a man ofhonour--Mr. Bardell was a man of his word--Mr. Bardell was nodeceiver--Mr. Bardell was once a single gentleman himself; to singlegentlemen I look for protection, for assistance, for comfort, and forconsolation--in single gentlemen I shall perpetually see something toremind me of what Mr. Bardell was, when he first won my young and untriedaffections; to a single gentleman, then, shall my lodgings be let. 'Actuated by this beautiful and touching impulse (among the best impulsesof our imperfect nature, gentlemen), the lonely and desolate widow driedher tears, furnished her first floor, caught her innocent boy to hermaternal bosom, and put the bill up in her parlour window. Did it remainthere long? No. The serpent was on the watch, the train was laid, themine was preparing, the sapper and miner was at work. Before the billhad been in the parlour window three days--three days, gentlemen--abeing, erect upon two legs, and bearing all the outward semblance of aman, and not of a monster, knocked at the door of Mrs. Bardell's house. He enquired within. "

Those who attended the Reading will recall the admirable briskness, andmore admirable spirit with which Boz delivered the passage "by theevidence of the unimpeachable female whom I shall place in that"--here hebrought down his palm with a mighty slap on the desk, and added, after amoment's pause, "_Box_ before you. " It was that _preceding_ of thestroke that told. So real was it, one fancied oneself listening to someobstreperous counsel. In all true acting--notably on the Frenchboards--the gesture should a little precede the utterance. So theserjeant knew something of art. 

When Mr. Pickwick gave an indignant start on hearing himself described asa heartless villain how cleverly does the capable Buzfuz turn theincident to profit. 

 [Picture: Mr. Pickwick as a Monster]

 'I say systematic villany, gentlemen, ' said Serjeant Buzfuz, looking through Mr. Pickwick, and talking _at_ him; 'and when I say systematic villiany, let me tell the defendant, Pickwick, if he be in court, as I am informed he is, that it would have been more decent in him, more becoming, in better judgment and in better taste, if he had stopped away. Let me tell him, gentlemen, that any gestures of dissent or disapprobation in which he may indulge in this court will not go down with you; that you will know how to value, and to appreciate them; and let me tell him further, as my lord will tell you, gentlemen, that a counsel, in the discharge of his duty to his client, is neither to be intimidated nor bullied, nor put down; and that any attempt to do either the one or the other, or the first or the last, will recoil on the head of the attempter, be he plaintiff or be he defendant, be his name Pickwick, or Noakes, or Stoakes, or Stiles, or Brown, or Thompson. '

 This little divergence from the subject in hand, had of course the intended effect of turning all eyes to Mr. Pickwick. 

We relish, too, another "common form. " When the Serjeant found that hisjest as to "greasing the wheels of Mr. Pickwick's slow-coach" hadsomewhat missed fire--a thing that often unaccountably happens, in thecase of the "twelve intelligent men, " the Serjeant knew how to adroitlyrecover himself. 

 He paused in this place to see whether the jury smiled at his joke; but as nobody took it but the greengrocer, whose sensitiveness on the subject was very probably occasioned by his having subjected a chaise-cart to the process in question on that identical morning, the learned Serjeant considered it advisable to undergo a slight relapse into the dismals before he concluded. 

 'But enough of this, gentlemen, ' said Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz, 'it is difficult to smile with an aching heart; it is ill jesting when our deepest sympathies are awakened. My client's hopes and prospects are ruined, and it is no figure of speech to say that her occupation is gone indeed. The bill is down--but there is no tenant. Eligible single gentlemen pass and repass--but there is no invitation for them to enquire within or without. All is gloom and silence in the house; even the voice of the child is hushed; his infant sports are disregarded when his mother weeps; his "alley tors" and his "commoneys" are alike neglected; he forgets the long familiar cry of "knuckle down, " and at tip-cheese, or odd and even, his hand is out. But Pickwick, gentlemen, Pickwick, the ruthless destroyer of this domestic oasis in the desert of Goswell Street--Pickwick, who has choked up the well, and thrown ashes on the sward--Pickwick, who comes before you to-day with his heartless tomato sauce and warming-pans--Pickwick still rears his head with unblushing effrontery, and gazes without a sigh on the ruin he has made. Damages, gentlemen--heavy damages is the only punishment with which you can visit him. '

THE INCRIMINATING LETTERS. 

"I shall prove to you, gentlemen, that _about a year ago Pickwicksuddenly began to absent himself from home_, during long intervals, ('onPickwick Tours, ') _as if with the intention of breaking off from myclient_: but I shall show you also that his resolutions were not at thattime sufficiently strong, or that his better feelings conquered, _ifbetter feelings he has_: or that the charms and accomplishments of myclient prevailed against his unmanly intentions. " We may note thereserve which suggested a struggle going on in Mr. Pickwick. And howpersuasive is Buzfuz's _exegesis_! Then, on the letters:

"These letters bespeak the character of the man. They are not open, fervid, eloquent epistles breathing nothing but the language ofaffectionate attachment. They are _covert_, _sly_, under-handcommunications, but, fortunately, far more conclusive than if couched inthe most glowing language. _Letters that must be viewed with a cautiousand supicious eye_: _letters that were evidently intended at the time_, _by Pickwick_, _to mislead and delude any third parties into whose handsthey might fall_. " The gravity and persuasiveness of all this is really_impayable_. "Let me read the first: 'Garraway's, twelve o'clock. DearMrs. B. , Chops and tomato sauce. Yours, Pickwick. ' Gentlemen, what doesthis mean? Chops and tomato sauce. Yours, Pickwick. Chops! GraciousHeavens!--and tomato sauce! Gentlemen, is the happiness of a sensitiveand confiding female _to be trifled_ away by such artifices as these?_The next has no date_ _whatever which is in itself suspicious_: 'DearMrs. B. , I shall not be at home until to-morrow. Slow coach. ' And thenfollows the very remarkable expression, 'Don't trouble yourself about thewarming pan. '"

There is a little bit of serious history connected with these letterswhich I was the first I think to discover. They were intended tosatirise the trivial scraps brought forward in Mrs. Norton's matrimonialcase--Norton _v. _ Lord Melbourne. My late friend, "Charles Dickens theyounger, " as he used to call himself, in his notes on _Pickwick_, putsaside this theory altogether as a mere unfounded fancy; but it will beseen there cannot be a doubt in the matter. Sir W. Follett laid just asmuch stress on these scraps as Serjeant Buzfuz did on his: he even usedthe phrase, "it seems there may be latent love like latent heat, in theseproductions. " We have also, "Yours Melbourne, " like "Yours Pickwick, "the latter signing as though he were a Peer. "There is another of thesenotes, " went on Sir William, "How are you?" "Again there is no beginningyou see. " "The next has no date, which is in itself suspicious, " Buzfuzwould have added. Another ran--"I will call about half past four, Yours. " "_These_ are the only notes that have been found, " added thecounsel, with due gravity, "_they seem to import much more than merewords convey_. " After this can there be a doubt?

This case was tried in June, 1836, and, it must be borne in mind, causeda prodigious sensation all over the Kingdom. The Pickwick part, containing the description, appeared about December, six monthsafterwards. Only old people may recall Norton _v. _ Melbourne, the fairCaroline's wrongs have long been forgotten; but it is curious that thememory of it should have been kept alive in some sort by this farcicalparody. Equally curious is it that the public should always haveinsisted that she was the heroine of yet another story, George Meredith's_Diana_, though the author has disclaimed it over and over again. 

The Serjeant's dealing with the warming pan topic is a truly admirablesatiric touch, and not one bit far-fetched or exaggerated. Any onefamiliar with suspicious actions has again and again heard comments asplausible and as forced. "Don't trouble yourself about the warming pan!The warming pan! Why, gentlemen, who _does_ trouble himself about awarming pen?" A delicious _non sequitur_, sheer nonsense, and yet withan air of conviction that is irresistable. "When was the peace of mindof man or woman broken or disturbed by a warming pan which is in itself aharmless, a useful _and I will add_, _gentlemen_, a comforting article ofdomestic furniture?" He then goes on ingeniously to suggest that it maybe "a cover for hidden fire, a mere substitute for some endearing word orpromise, _agreeably to a preconcerted system_ of correspondence, artfullycontrived by Pickwick _with a view_ to his contemplated desertion andwhich I am not in a position to explain?" Admirable indeed! One couldimagine a city jury in their wisdom thinking that there must be_something_ in this warming pan!

Not less amusing and plausible is his dealing with the famous topic ofthe "chops and tomato sauce, " not "tomata" as Boz has it. I supposethere is no popular allusion better understood than this. The very manin the street knows all about it and what it means. Absurd as it mayseem, it is hardly an exaggeration. Counsel every day give weight topoints just as trivial and expound them elaborately to the jury. TheSerjeant's burst of horror is admirable, "Gentlemen, _what does thismean_? 'Chops and tomata sauce! Yours Pickwick!' Chops! GraciousHeavens! What does this mean? Is the happiness of a sensitive andconfiding female to be trifled away _by such shallow artifices asthese_?'"

I recall that admirable judge and pleasant man, the late Lord FitzGerald, who was fond of talking of this trial, saying to me that Buzfuz lost agood point here, as he might have dwelt on the mystic meaning of tomatowhich is the "love apple, " that here was the "secret correspondence, " thereal "cover for hidden fire. "

He concluded by demanding exemplary damages as "the recompense you canaward my client. And for these damages she now appeals to anenlightened, a high-minded, a right feeling, a conscientious, adispassionate, a sympathising, a contemplative jury of her civilizedcountrymen!"

THE PLAINTIFF'S CASE. 

It was really of a very flimsy kind but "bolstered-up" and carriedthrough by the bluster of the serjeant and the smartness of his junior. It rested first on a dialogue between Mr. Pickwick and his landlady whichwas overheard, in fact by several persons; second, on a strikingsituation witnessed by his three friends who entered unexpectedly andsurprised him with Mrs. Bardell in his arms; third, on some documentaryevidence, and lastly, on a damaging incident disclosed by Winkle. 

The first witness "put in the box, " was Mrs. Martha Cluppins--an intimatefriend of the plaintiffs. 

We know that she was sister to Mrs. Raddle, who lived far away inSouthwark, and was the landlady of Mr. Sawyer. She might have beencross-examined with effect as to her story that she had been "out buyingkidney pertaties, " etc. Why buy these articles in Goswell Street andcome all the way from Southwark? What was she doing there at all? Thisquestion could have been answered only in one way--which was that thegenial author fancied at the moment she was living near Mrs. Bardell. 

Besides this, there was another point which Snubbin, incross-examination, ought to have driven home. Mrs. Cluppins was of aninferior type, of the common washerwoman or "charing" sort; her languagewas of Mrs. Gamp's kind; "which her name was" so and so. Yet, thiscreature, in another room, or on the stairs, the door being "on the jar, "can repeat with her limited appreciation, those dubious and imperfectutterances of Mr. Pickwick! How could she remember all? Or could sheunderstand them? Impossible! She, however, may have caught upsomething. 

Winkle, too, said he heard something as he came up the stairs--"Composeyourself my dear creature, for consider if any one were to come, " etc. But what could be the value of evidence heard in this way? Would a jurybelieve it? "Not only, " as Sam said, "is 'wision limited, '" but hearingalso. 

In short, the delicate subtleties of the conversation between Mr. Pickwick and Mrs. Bardell would be wholly lost in her hands. Persons ofher class know nothing of suggestion or double meanings or reservedintention, everything for them must be in black and white. How unlikely, therefore, that through the panels of a door or through the half openeddoor, ("she said on the jar, ") could she catch the phrases and theirmeanings, and, above all, retain them in her memory? No doubt, as thecounsel put it bluntly, she listened, and with all her ears. 

However this may be, here is what Mrs. Cluppins deposed to:

 'Mrs. Cluppins, ' said Serjeant Buzfuz, 'pray compose yoursel, ma'am;' and, of course, directly Mrs. Cluppins was desired to compose herself she sobbed with increased violence, and gave divers alarming manifestations of an approaching fainting fit, or, as she afterwards said, of her feelings being too many for her. 

 'Do you recollect, Mrs. Cluppins?' said Serjeant Buzfuz, after a few unimportant questions--'do you recollect being in Mrs. Bardell's back one pair of stairs, on one particular morning in July last, when she was dusting Mr. Pickwick's apartment?'

 'Yes, my Lord and jury, I do, ' replied Mrs. Cluppins. 

 'Mr. Pickwick's sitting-room was the first floor front, I believe?'

 'Yes it were, sir, ' replied Mrs. Cluppins. 

 'What were you doing in the back room, ma'am?' inquired the little judge. 

 'My Lord and jury, ' said Mrs. Cluppins, with interesting agitation, 'I will not deceive you. '

 'You had better not, ma'am, ' said the little judge. 

 'I was there, ' resumed Mrs. Cluppins, 'unbeknown to Mrs. Bardell; I had been out with a little basket, gentlemen, to buy three pounds of red kidney pertaties, which was three pound, tuppense ha'penny, when I see Mrs. Bardell's street door on the jar. '

 'On the what?' exclaimed the little judge. 

 'Partly open, my Lord, ' said Serjeant Snubbin. 

 'She _said_ on the jar, ' said the little judge with a cunning look. 

 'It's all the same, my lord, ' said Serjeant Snubbin. The little judge looked doubtful, and said he'd make a note of it. Mrs. Cluppins then resumed--

 'I walked in, gentlemen, just to say good mornin', and went in a permiscuous manner up-stairs, and into the back room. Gentlemen, there was the sound of voices in the front room, and--'

 'And you listened, I believe, Mrs. Cluppins, ' said Serjeant Buzfuz. 

 'Beggin' your pardon, sir, ' replied Mrs. Cluppins, in a majestic manner, 'I would scorn the haction. The voices was very loud, sir, and forced themselves upon my ear. '

 'Well, Mrs. Cluppins, you were not listening, but you heard the voices. Was one of those voices Mr. Pickwick's?'

 'Yes, it were, sir. '

 And Mrs. Cluppins, after distinctly stating that Mr. Pickwick addressed himself to Mrs. Bardell, repeated by slow degrees, and by dint of many questions the conversation with which our readers are already acquainted. 

Now we have to turn back to one of the earlier passages in the story forthe conversation between the pair, "with which the reader is alreadyacquainted. " Thus we shall know what Mrs. Cluppin's might have heard. 

 Mr. Pickwick paced the room to and fro with hurried steps, popped his head out of the window at intervals of about three minutes each, constantly referred to his watch, and exhibited many other manifestations of impatience, very unusual with him. It was evident that something of great importance was in contemplation, but what that something was not even Mrs. Bardell herself had been enabled to discover. 

 'Mrs. Bardell, ' said Mr. Pickwick at last, as that amiable female approached the termination of a prolonged dusting of the apartment. 

 'Sir, ' said Mrs. Bardell. 

 'Your little boy is a very long time gone. '

 'Why, it's a good long way to the Borough, sir, ' remonstrated Mrs. Bardell. 

 'Ah, ' said Pickwick, 'very true; so it is. '

 Mr. Pickwick relapsed into silence, and Mrs. Bardell resumed her dusting. 

 'Mrs. Bardell, ' said Mr. Pickwick, at the expiration of a few minutes. 

 'Sir, ' said Mrs. Bardell again. 

 'Do you think it's a much greater expense to keep two people, than to keep one?'

 'La, Mr. Pickwick, ' said Mrs. Bardell, colouring up to the very border of her cap, as she fancied she observed a species of matrimonial twinkle in the eyes of her lodger, 'La, Mr. Pickwick, what a question!'

 'Well, but _do_ you?' inquired Mr. Pickwick. 

 'That depends--' said Mrs. Bardell, approaching the duster very near to Mr. Pickwick's elbow, which was planted on the table; 'that depends a good deal upon the person, you know, Mr. Pickwick; and whether it's a saving and careful person, sir. '

 'That's very true, ' said Mr. Pickwick, 'but the person I have in my eye (here he looked very hard at Mrs. Bardell) I think possesses these qualities; and has, moreover, a considerable knowledge of the world, and a great deal of sharpness, Mrs. Bardell; which may be of material use to me. '

 'La, Mr. Pickwick, ' said Mrs. Bardell; the crimson rising to her cap-border again. 

 'I do, ' said Mr. Pickwick, growing energetic, as was his wont in speaking of a subject which interested him, 'I do, indeed; and to tell you the truth, Mrs. Bardell, I have made up my mind. '

 'Dear me, sir, ' exclaimed Mrs. Bardell. 

 'You'll think it very strange, now, ' said the amiable Mr. Pickwick, with a good humoured glance at his companion, 'that I never consulted you about this matter, and never even mentioned it, till I sent your little boy out this morning, eh?'

 Mrs. Bardell could only reply by a look. She had long worshipped Mr. Pickwick at a distance, but here she was, all at once, raised to a pinnacle to which her wildest and most extravagant hopes and never dared to aspire. Mr. Pickwick was going to propose--a deliberate plan, too--sent her little boy to the Borough, to get him out of the way--how thoughtful--how considerate!'

 'Well, ' said Mr. Pickwick, 'what do you think?'

 'Oh, Mr. Pickwick, ' said Mrs. Bardell, trembling with agitation, 'you're very kind, sir. '

 'It'll save you a good deal of trouble, won't it?' said Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Oh, I never thought anything of the trouble, sir, ' replied Mrs. Bardell; 'and, of course, I should take more trouble to please you then, than ever; but it is so kind of you, Mr. Pickwick, to have so much consideration for my loneliness. '

 'Ah, to be sure, ' said Mr. Pickwick; 'I never thought of that. When I am in town, you'll always have somebody to sit with you. To be sure, so you will. '

 'I'm sure I ought to be a very happy woman, ' said Mrs. Bardell. 

 'And your little boy--' said Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Bless his heart, ' interposed Mrs. Bardell, with a maternal sob. 

 'He, too, will have a companion, ' resumed Mr. Pickwick, 'a lively one, who'll teach him, I'll be bound, more tricks in a week than he would ever learn in a year. ' And Mr. Pickwick smiled placidly. 

 'Oh, you dear--' said Mrs. Bardell. 

 Mr. Pickwick started. 

 'Oh, you kind, good, playful dear, ' said Mrs. Bardell; and without more ado, she rose from her chair, and flung her arms round Mr. Pickwick's neck, with a cataract of tears, and a chorus of sobs. 

 'Bless my soul, ' cried the astonished Mr. Pickwick;--'Mrs. Bardell, my good woman--dear me, what a situation--pray--consider, Mrs. Bardell, if anybody should come. '

 'O, let them come, ' exclaimed Mrs. Bardell, frantically. 

 'I'll never leave you, dear, kind, good soul. ' And with these words Mrs. Bardell clung the tighter. 

Every utterance of the little Judge is in character, from his firstdirections "go on. " His suspicious question, "what were you doing in theback room, ma'am?"--and on Serjeant Buzfuz's sudden pause for breath, when "the _silence_ awoke Mr. Justice Stareleigh, who immediately wrotedown something, with a pen without any ink in it, and looked unusuallyprofound, to impress his jury with the belief that he always thought mostdeeply with his eyes shut. " Also when at the "on the jar" incident--he"looked doubtful, but said he'd make a note of it. " So when Sam made oneof his free and easy speeches, the Judge looked sternly at Sam for fullytwo minutes, but Sam's features were so perfectly calm that he saidnothing. When Sam, too, made his witty _reposte_ to Buzfuz as to his"wision being limited, " we are told that there was a great laugh--thateven "the little Judge smiled:" a good touch, for he enjoyed, like otherjudges, seeing his learned brother get a fall--'tis human nature. 

It must be said the impression of a listener, who had heard all thiscould have been anything but favourable to Mr. Pickwick. No doubt therewas his paternally benevolent character to correct it: but even thismight go against him as it would suggest a sort of hypocrisy. Even thefirmest friends, in their surprise, do not pause to debate or reason;they are astonished and wonder exceedingly. 

WINKLE'S EVIDENCE. 

Skimpin may have been intended for Wilkin, a later Serjeant andwell-known in the 'fifties, and whose style and manner is reproduced. Wecould not ask a better junior in a "touch and go" case. He was as readyto take advantage of any opening as was the late Lord Bowen, when he wasjunior in the Tichborne case. 

 [Picture: Mr. Skimpin]

On entering the Box, Mr. Winkle "bowed to the Judge, " with considerabledeference, a politeness quite thrown away. "Don't look at me sir, " saidthe Judge sharply, "look at the Jury. " This was ungracious, but judgesgenerally don't relish any advances from witnesses or others. 

When poor Winkle was accused by the Judge of giving his name as Daniel, he was told that "he had better be careful:" on which the ready Skimpin:"Now, Mr. Winkle attend to me if you please: and let me recommend you, for your own sake, to bear in mind his lordship's injunction to becareful. " Thus by the agency of Judge and counsel witness wasdiscredited at starting and of course flurried. 

 'I believe you are a particular friend of Pickwick, the defendant, are you not?

Winkle, eager to retrieve himself by being "careful" began--

 'I have known Mr. Pickwick now as well as I recollect at this moment, nearly--'

 'Pray, Mr. Winkle, don't evade the question. Are you, or are you not a particular friend of the defendant?'

 'I was just about to say that--'

 'Will you, or will you not answer my question, sir?'

 'If you don't you'll be committed, sir, ' interposed the little Judge. 

 'Come, sir, ' said Mr. Skimpin, '_yes or no_, _if you please_. '

 'Yes, I am, ' replied Mr. Winkle. 

 '_Yes_, _you are_. _And why couldn't you say that at once_, _sir_?'

I think there is no more happy touch of legal satire in the books thanthat about "What the soldier said. " It is perfect, so complete, that itis always understood by unprofessional readers. The lawyer feels at oncethat it is as true as it is happy. 

 'Little to do and plenty to get, ' said Serjeant Buzfuz to Sam. 

 'O, quite enough to get, sir, as the soldier said ven they ordered him three hundred and fifty lashes. '

 '_You must not tell us what the soldier or any other man said_, _sir_; _it's not evidence_, ' interposed the Judge. 

Who will forget the roar that always greeted this sally when Boz read it, or the low and slow solemnity which he imparted to the Judge's dictum. As an illustration it is simply admirable. 

Boz himself would have been pleased to find himself quoted in twoimpressive legal tomes of some 1800 pages. The great and laborious JohnPitt Taylor could not have been wholly a legal dry-as-dust: for the manwho could have gravely entered Bardell _v. _ Pickwick in his notes andhave quoted a passage must have had a share of humour. 

Most people know that it is a strict principle that "hearsay evidence" ofan utterance will not be accepted in lieu of that of the person to whomthe remark was made. Neither can we think it out of probability thatsuch an objection may have been made by some over punctilious judgewishing to restrain Sam's exuberance. A Scotch judge once quoted incourt a passage from _The Antiquary_ in which he said the true view of anintricate point was given; but then Scott was a lawyer. 

It is requisite, says Mr. John Pitt Taylor (p. 500) speaking of "hearsayevidence" that whatever facts a witness speaks, he should be confined tothose lying within his own knowledge. For every witness should give histestimony on oath, and should be subject to cross examination. Buttestimony from the relation of third persons cannot be subject to thesetests. This rule of exclusion has been recognised as a fundamentalprinciple of the law of evidence ever since the time of Charles II. Tothis he adds a note, with all due gravity: "The rule excluding heresayevidence, or rather the mode in which that rule is frequentlymisunderstood in Courts of Justice, is amusingly caricatured by Mr. Dickens _in his report_ of the case of Bardell _v. _ Pickwick, p. 367. "

Bardell _v. _ Pickwick! He thus puts it with the many thousand or tens ofthousand cases quoted, and he has even found a place for it in his indexof places. He then goes on to quote the passage, just as he would quotefrom Barnwall and Adolphus. 

How sagacious--full of legal point--is Boz's comment on Winkle'sincoherent evidence. Phunky asked him whether he had any reason tosuppose that Pickwick was about to be married. "'Oh no; certainly not, 'replied Mr. Winkle with so much eagerness, that Mr. Phunky ought to havegot him out of the box with all possible dispatch. Lawyers hold out thatthere are two kinds of particularly bad witnesses: a reluctant witness, and a too willing witness;" and most true it is. Both commit themselvesin each case, but in different ways. The matter of the former, and themanner of the latter do the mischief. The ideal witness affectsindifference, and is as impartial as the record of a phonograph. It iswonderful where Boz learned all this. No doubt from his friend Talfourd, K. C. , who carefully revised "The Trial. "

Skimpin's interpretation of Mr. Pickwick's consolatory phrase, which heevidently devised on the spur of the moment, shows him to be a veryready, smart fellow. 

 'Now, Mr. Winkle, I have only one more question to ask you, and I beg you to bear in mind his Lordship's caution. Will you undertake to swear that Pickwick, the Defendant, did not say on the occasion in question--"My dear Mrs. Bardell, you're a good creature; compose yourself to this situation, for to this situation you must come, " or words to that effect?'

 'I--I didn't understand him so, certainly, ' said Mr. Winkle, astounded at this ingenious dove-tailing of the few words he had heard. 'I was on the staircase, and couldn't hear distinctly; the impression on my mind is--'

 'The gentlemen of the jury want none of the impressions on your mind, Mr. Winkle, which I fear would be of little service to honest, straightforward men, ' interposed Mr. Skimpin. 'You were on the staircase, and didn't distinctly hear; but you will swear that Pickwick _did not make use_ of the expressions I have quoted? Do I understand that?'

 'No, I will not, ' replied Mr. Winkle; and down sat Mr. Skimpin, with a triumphant countenance. 

This "Will you swear he did _not_, " etc. , is a device familiar to crossexaminers, and is used when the witness cannot be got to accept the wordsor admit that they were used. It of course means little or nothing: butits effect on the jury is that they come to fancy that the words _may_have been used, and that the witness is not very clear as to hisrecollection. 

How well described, too, and satirised, is yet another "common form" ofthe cross examiner, to wit the "How often, Sir?" question. Winkle, whenasked as to his knowledge of Mrs. Bardell, replied that "he did not knowher, but that he had seen her. " (I recall making this very answer to Bozwhen we were both driving through Sackville Street, Dublin. He had asked"Did I know so-and-so?" when I promptly replied, "I don't know him, but Ihave seen him. " This rather arrided him, as Elia would say. )

Skimpin went on:

 'Oh, you don't know her, but you have seen her. '

 'Now have the goodness to tell the gentlemen of the jury what you mean by _that_, Mr. Winkle. '

 'I mean that I am not intimate with her, but that I have seen her when I went to call on Mr. Pickwick, in Goswell Street. '

 'How often have you seen her, Sir?'

 'How often?'

 '_Yes_, _Mr. Winkle_, _how often_? I'll repeat the question for you a dozen times, if you require it, Sir. ' And the learned gentlemen, with a firm and steady frown, placed his hands on his hips, and smiled suspiciously to the jury. 

 _On this question there arose the edifying brow-beating_, _customary on such points_. First of all, Mr. Winkle said it was quite impossible for him to say how many times he had seen Mrs. Bardell. Then he was asked if he had seen her twenty times, to which he replied, 'Certainly, --more than that. ' And then he was asked whether he hadn't seen her a hundred times--whether he couldn't swear that he had seen her more than fifty times--whether he didn't know that he had seen her at least seventy-five times, and so forth; the satisfactory conclusion which was arrived at, at last, being--that he had better take care of himself, and mind what he was about. The witness having been, by these means, reduced to the requisite ebb of nervous perplexity, the examination was concluded. 

How excellent is this. Who has not heard the process repeated over andover again from the young fledgeling Counsel to the old "hardbitten" andexperienced K. C. ?

A young legal tyro might find profit as well as entertainment incarefully studying others of Mr. Skimpin's adroit methods in crossexamination. They are in a manner typical of those in favour with themore experienced members of the profession, allowing, of course, for alittle humorous exaggeration. He will note also that Boz shows clearlyhow effective was the result of the processes. Here are a few usefulrecipes. 

_How to make a witness appear as though he wished to withhold thetruth_. _ How to highly discredit a witness by an opening question_. _How to insinuate inaccuracy_. _ How to suggest that the witness isevading_. _ How to deal with a statement of a particular number ofinstances_. _ How to take advantage of a witness' glances_. _ How tosuggest another imputed meaning to a witness' statement and confuse himinto accepting it_. 

Another happy and familiar form is Skimpin's interrogation of Winkle asto his "friends"--

 'Are they here?'

 'Yes they are, ' said Mr. Winkle, _looking very earnestly towards the spot where his friends were stationed_. 

As every one attending courts knows, this is an almost intuitive movementin a witness; he thinks it corroborates him somehow. 

But how good Skimpin and how ready--

"'Pray attend to me, Mr. Winkle, and _never mind your friends_, ' withanother expressive look at the jury; '_they must tell their storieswithout any previous consultation with you_, if none has yet takenplace, ' another expressive look. 'Now Sir, tell what you saw, ' etc. '_Come_, _out with it_, _sir_, _we must_ have it sooner or later. '" Theassumption here that the witness would keep back what he knew is adroitand very convincing. 

A REVELATION. 

But now we come to a very critical passage in Mr. Pickwick's case: onethat really destroyed any chance that he had. It really settled thematter with the jury; and the worst was, the point was brought outthrough the inefficiency of his own counsel. 

But let us hear the episode, and see how the foolish Phunky muddled it. 

 Mr. Phunky rose for the purpose of getting something important out of Mr. Winkle in cross-examination. Whether he did get anything important out of him, will immediately appear. 

 [Picture: Mr. Phunky]

 'I believe, Mr. Winkle, ' said Mr. Phunky, 'that Mr. Pickwick is not a young man?'

 'Oh no, ' replied Mr. Winkle, 'old enough to be my father. '

 'You have told my learned friend that you have known Mr. Pickwick a long time. Had you ever any reason to suppose or believe that he was about to be married?'

 'Oh no; certainly not;' replied Mr. Winkle with so much eagerness, that Mr. Phunky ought to have got him out of the box with all possible dispatch. Lawyers hold out that there are two kinds of particularly bad witnesses, a reluctant witness, and a too willing witness; it was Mr. Winkle's fate to figure in both characters. 

 'I will even go further than this, Mr. Winkle, ' continued Mr. Phunky, in a most smooth and complacent manner. 'Did you ever see any thing in Mr. Pickwick's manner and conduct towards the opposite sex to induce you to believe that he ever contemplated matrimony of late years, in any case?'

 'Oh no; certainly not, ' replied Mr. Winkle. 

 'Has his behaviour, when females have been in the case, always been that of a man, who having attained a pretty advanced period of life, content with his own occupations and amusements, treats them only as a father might his daughters?'

 'Not the least doubt of it, ' replied Mr. Winkle, in the fulness of his heart. 'That is--yes--oh yes--certainly. '

 'You have never known anything in his behaviour towards Mrs. Bardell, or any other female, in the least degree suspicious?' said Mr. Phunky, preparing to sit down, for Serjeant Snubbin was winking at him. 

 'N--n--no, ' replied Mr. Winkle, 'except on one trifling occasion, which, I have no doubt, might be easily explained. '

 Now, if the unfortunate Mr. Phunky had sat down when Serjeant Snubbin winked at him, or if Serjeant Buzfuz had stopped this irregular cross-examination at the outset (which he knew better than to do, for observing Mr. Winkle's anxiety, and well knowing it would in all probability, lead to something serviceable to him), this unfortunate admission would not have been elicited. The moment the words fell from Mr. Winkle's lips, Mr. Phunky sat down, and Serjeant Snubbin rather hastily told him he might leave the box, which Mr. Winkle prepared to do with great readiness, when Serjeant Buzfuz stopped him. 

 'Stay, Mr. Winkle--stay, ' said Serjeant Buzfuz, 'will your lordship have the goodness to ask him, what this one instance of suspicious behaviour towards females on the part of this gentlemen, who is old enough to be his father, was?'

 'You hear what the learned counsel says, Sir, ' observed the Judge, turning to the miserable and agonized Mr. Winkle. 'Describe the occasion to which you refer. '

 'My lord, ' said Mr. Winkle, trembling with anxiety, 'I--I'd rather not. '

And Winkle had to relate the whole Ipswich adventure of the doublebeddedroom and the spinster lady. 

It is surprising that Dodson and Fogg did not ferret out all about Mr. Pickwick's adventure at the Great White Horse. Peter Magnus lived intown and must have heard of the coming case; these things _do_ somehowleak out, and he would have gladly volunteered the story, were it only tospite the man. But further, Dodson and Fogg must have made all sorts ofenquiries into Mr. Pickwick's doings. Mrs. Bardell herself might haveheard something. The story was certainly in the Ipswich papers, forthere was the riot in the street, the appearance before the mayor, theexposure of "Captain FitzMarshall"--a notable business altogether. Whata revelation in open court! Conceive Miss Witherfield called to deposeto Mr. Pickwick's midnight invasion. Mr. Pickwick himself might havebeen called and put on the rack, this incident not concerning his breachof promise. And supposing that the ubiquitous Jingle had heard of thisbusiness and had gone to the solicitor's office to volunteer evidence, and most useful evidence it would have been--to wit that Mr. Pickwick hadbeen caught in the garden of a young ladies' school and had alarmed thehouse by his attempts to gain admission in the small hours! Jingle ofcourse, could not be permitted to testify to this, but he could put thefirm on the track. Mr. Pickwick's reputation could hardly have survivedthese two revelations, and sweeping damages to the full amount would havebeen the certain result. 

This extraordinary adventure of Mr. Pickwick's at the Great White HorseInn, Ipswich, verifies Dodson's casual remark to him, that "he was eithera very designing or a most unfortunate man, " circumstances being sostrong against him. As the story was brought out, in open court, owingto the joint indiscretion of Phunky and Winkle, it will be best, injustice to Mr. Pickwick, to give practically his account of the affair. 

 'Nobody sleeps in the other bed, of course, ' said Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Oh no, sir. '

 'Very good. Tell my servant to bring me up some hot water at half-past eight in the morning, and that I shall not want him any more to-night. '

 'Yes, sir. '

 And bidding Mr. Pickwick good-night, the chambermaid retired, and left him alone. 

 Mr. Pickwick sat himself down in a chair before the fire, and fell into a train of rambling meditations. First he thought of his friends, and wondered when they would join him; _then his mind reverted to Mrs. Martha Bardell_; and from that lady it wandered, by a natural process, to the dingy counting-house of Dodson and Fogg. From Dodson and Fogg's it flew off at tangent, to the very centre of the history of the queer client; and then it came back to the Great White Horse at Ipswich, with sufficient clearness to convince Mr. Pickwick that he was falling asleep: so he aroused himself, and began to undress, when he recollected he had left his watch on the table down stairs. So as it was pretty late now, and he was unwilling to ring his bell at that hour of the night, he slipped on his coat, of which he had just divested himself, and taking the japanned candlestick in his hand, walked quietly down stairs. 

 The more stairs Mr. Pickwick went down, the more stairs there seemed to be to descend, and again and again, when Mr. Pickwick got into some narrow passage, and began to congratulate himself on having gained the ground-floor, did another flight of stairs appear before his astonished eyes. At last he reached a stone hall, which he remembered to have seen when he entered the house. Passage after passage did he explore; room after room did he peep into; at length, just as he was on the point of giving up the search in despair, he opened the door of the identical room in which he had spent the evening, and beheld his missing property on the table. 

 Mr. Pickwick seized the watch in triumph, and proceeded to retrace his steps to his bed-chamber. If his progress downwards had been attended with difficulties and uncertainty, his journey back, was infinitely more perplexing. Rows of doors, garnished with boots of every shape, make, and size, branched off in every possible direction. A dozen times did he softly turn the handle of some bedroom door, which resembled his own, when a gruff cry from within of "Who the devil's that?" or "What do want here?" caused him to steal away on tiptoe, with a perfectly marvellous celerity. He was reduced to the verge of despair, when an open door attracted his attention. He peeped in--right at last. There were the two beds, whose situation he perfectly remembered, and the fire still burning. His candle, not a long one when he first received it, had flickered away in the drafts of air through which he had passed, and sunk into the socket, just as he had closed the door after him. 'No matter, ' said Mr. Pickwick, 'I can undress myself just as well by the light of the fire. '

 The bedsteads stood, one each side of the door; and on the inner side of each, was a little path, terminating in a rush-bottomed chair, just wide enough to admit of a person's getting into, or out of bed, on that side if he or she thought proper. Having carefully drawn the curtains of his bed on the outside, Mr. Pickwick sat down on the rush-bottomed chair, and leisurely divested himself of his shoes and gaiters. He then took off and folded up, his coat, waistcoat, and neck-cloth, and slowly drawing on his tasseled night-cap, secured it firmly on his head, by tying beneath his chin, the strings which he always had attached to that article of dress. It was at this moment that the absurdity of his recent bewilderment struck upon his mind; and throwing himself back in the rush-bottomed chair, Mr. Pickwick laughed to himself so heartily, that it would have been quite delightful to any man of well-constituted mind to have watched the smiles which expanded his amiable features, as they shone forth, from beneath the night-cap. 

 'It is the best idea, ' said Mr. Pickwick to himself, smiling till he almost cracked the night-cap strings--'It is the best idea, my losing myself in this place, and wandering about those staircases, that I ever heard of. Droll, droll, very droll. ' Here Mr. Pickwick smiled again, a broader smile than before, and was about to continue the process of undressing, in the best possible humour, when he was suddenly stopped by a most unexpected interruption; to wit, the entrance into the room of some person with a candle, who, after locking the door, advanced to the dressing table, and set down the light upon it. 

 The smile that played upon Mr. Pickwick's features, was instantaneously lost in a look of the most unbounded and wonder-stricken surprise. The person, whoever it was, had come so suddenly and with so little noise, that Mr. Pickwick had had no time to call out, or oppose their entrance. Who could it be? A robber? Some evil-minded person who had seen him come upstairs with a handsome watch in his hand, perhaps. What was he to do!

 The only way in which Mr. Pickwick could catch a glimpse of his mysterious visitor with the least danger of being seen himself, was by creeping on to the bed, and peeping out from between the curtains on the opposite side. Keeping the curtains carefully closed with his hand, so that nothing more of him could be seen than his face and nightcap, and putting on his spectacles, he mustered up courage, and looked out. 

 Mr. Pickwick almost fainted with horror and dismay. Standing before the dressing glass, was a middle-aged lady in yellow curl-papers, busily engaged in brushing what ladies call their "back hair. " However the unconscious middle-aged lady came into that room, it was quite clear that she contemplated remaining there for the night; for she had brought a rushlight and shade with her, which with praiseworthy precaution against fire, she had stationed in a basin on the floor, where it was glimmering away, like a gigantic lighthouse, in a particularly small piece of water. 

 'Bless my soul, ' thought Mr. Pickwick, 'what a dreadful thing!'

 'Hem!' said the lady; and in went Mr. Pickwick's head with automaton-like rapidity. 

 'I never met with anything so awful as this, '--thought poor Mr. Pickwick, the cold perspiration starting in drops upon his nightcap. 'Never. This is fearful. '

 It was quite impossible to resist the urgent desire to see what was going forward. So out went Mr. Pickwick's head again. The prospect was worse than before. The middle-aged lady had finished arranging her hair; had carefully enveloped it, in a muslin nightcap with a small plaited border, and was gazing pensively on the fire. 

 'This matter is growing alarming'--reasoned Mr. Pickwick with himself. 'I can't allow things to go on in this way. By the self-possession of that lady, it's clear to me that I must have come into the wrong room. If I call out, she'll alarm the house, but if I remain here, the consequences will be still more frightful. '

 [Picture: The Double Bedded Room, Great White Horse, Ipswich]

 Mr. Pickwick, it is quite unnecessary to say, was one of the most modest and delicate-minded of mortals. The very idea of exhibiting his nightcap to a lady, overpowered him, but he had tied those confounded strings in a knot, and do what he would, he couldn't get it off. The disclosure must be made. There was only one other way of doing it. He shrunk behind the curtains, and called out very loudly--

 'Ha--hum. '

 That the lady started at this unexpected sound was evident, by her falling up against the rushlight shade; that she persuaded herself it must have been the effect of imagination was equally clear, for when Mr. Pickwick, under the impression that she had fainted away, stone-dead from fright, ventured to peep out again, she was gazing pensively on the fire as before. 

 'Most extraordinary female this, ' thought Mr. Pickwick, popping in again. 'Ha--hum. '

 These last sounds, so like those in which, as legends inform us, the ferocious giant Blunderbore was in the habit of expressing his opinion that it was time to lay the cloth, were too distinctly audible, to be again mistaken for the workings of fancy. 

 'Gracious Heaven!' said the middle-aged lady, 'what's that!'

 'It's--it's--only a gentleman, Ma'am, ' said Mr. Pickwick from behind the curtains. 

 'A gentleman!' said the lady with a terrific scream. 

 'It's all over, ' thought Mr. Pickwick. 

 'A strange man, ' shrieked the lady. Another instant and the house would be alarmed. Her garments rustled as she rushed towards the door. 

 'Ma'am, '--said Mr. Pickwick, thrusting out his head, in the extremity of desperation, 'Ma'am. '

 Now although Mr. Pickwick was not actuated by any definite object in putting out his head, it was instantaneously productive of a good effect. The lady, as we have alreaded stated, was near the door. She must pass it, to reach the staircase, and she would most undoubtedly have done so by this time, had not the sudden apparition of Mr. Pickwick's nightcap driven her back, into the remotest corner of the apartment, where she stood, staring wildly at Mr. Pickwick, while Mr. Pickwick, in his turn, stared wildly at her. 

 'Wretch, '--said the lady, covering her eyes with her hands, 'what do you want here. '

 'Nothing, Ma'am--nothing whatever, Ma'am, ' said Mr. Pickwick, earnestly. 

 'Nothing!' said the lady, looking up. 

 'Nothing, Ma'am, upon my honour, ' said Mr. Pickwick, nodding his head so energetically, that the tassel of his nightcap danced again. 'I am almost ready to sink, Ma'am, beneath the confusion of addressing a lady in my nightcap (here the lady hastily snatched off her's), but I can't get it off, Ma'am (here Mr. Pickwick gave it a tremendous tug in proof of the statment). It is evident to me, Ma'am, now, that I have mistaken this bedroom for my own. I had not been here five minutes, Ma'am, when you suddenly entered it. '

 'If this improbable story be really true, Sir, '--said the lady, sobbing violently, 'you will leave it instantly. '

 'I will, Ma'am, with the greatest pleasure, ' replied Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Instantly, Sir, ' said the lady. 

 'Certainly, Ma'am, ' interposed Mr. Pickwick very quickly. 'Certainly, Ma'am. I--I--am very sorry, Ma'am, ' said Mr. Pickwick, making his appearance at the bottom of the bed, 'to have been the innocent occasion of this alarm and emotion; deeply sorry Ma'am. '

 The lady pointed to the door. One excellent quality of Mr. Pickwick's character was beautifully displayed at this moment, under the most trying circumstances. Although he had hastily put on his hat over his night cap, after the manner of the old patrol; although he carried his shoes and gaiters in his hand, and his coat and waistcoat over his arm, nothing could subdue his native politeness. 

 'I am exceedingly sorry, Ma'am, ' said Mr. Pickwick, bowing very low. 

 'If you are, Sir, you will at once leave the room, ' said the lady. 

 'Immediately, Ma'am; this instant, Ma'am, ' said Mr. Pickwick, opening the door, and dropping both his shoes with a loud crash in so doing. 

 'I trust Ma'am, ' resumed Mr. Pickwick, gathering up his shoes, and turning round to bow again, 'I trust, Ma'am, that my unblemished character, and the devoted respect I entertain for your sex, will plead as some slight excuse for this'--But before Mr. Pickwick could conclude the sentence, the lady had thrust him into the passage, and locked and bolted the door behind him. 

 Whatever grounds of self-congratulation Mr. Pickwick might have, for having escaped so quietly from his late awkward situation, his present position was by no means enviable. He was alone, in an open passage, in a strange house, in the middle of the night, half dressed; it was not to be supposed that he could find his way in perfect darkness to a room which he had been wholly unable to discover with a light, and if he made the slightest noise in his fruitless attempts to do so, he stood every chance of being shot at, and perhaps killed, by some wakeful traveller. He had no resource but to remain where he was, until daylight appeared. So after groping his way a few paces down the passage, and to his infinite alarm, stumbling over several pairs of boots in so doing, Mr. Pickwick crouched into a little recess in the wall, to wait for morning, as philosophically as he might. 

 He was not destined, however, to undergo this additional trial of patience: for he had not been long ensconced in his present concealment when, to his unspeakable horror, a man, bearing a light, appeared at the end of the passage. His horror was suddenly converted into joy, however, when he recognized the form of his faithful attendant. It was indeed Mr. Samuel Weller, who after sitting up thus late, in conversation with the Boots, who was sitting up for the mail, was now about to retire to rest. 

Imagine this story told by Miss Witherfield in open court, with all itsdetails, the lady's narrative being coloured by the recollection that shehad lost a suitable husband owing to her adventure. Mr. Peter Magnuswould have deposed to Mr. Pickwick's extraordinary interest in the matterof the proposal, and have added his suspicions on recalling Mr. Pickwick's ambiguous declaration that he had come down to expose acertain person--even one of his own sympathetic friends, who hadwitnessed the scene with Mrs. Bardell, and recalled the Boarding Houseincident, might murmur, "How odd that he is ever thus in pursuit of thefair under suspicious circumstances? _could_ it be that after all?--Whatif he had some previous knowledge of the lady, and secretly admired her, and stung to fury at the notion of Mr. Peter Magnus marrying, had takenthis strange mode of declaring his passion?" Even the sagacious Sam, devoted as he was to his master, was taken aback on meeting him in hismidnight wanderings. 

 'Sam, ' said Mr. Pickwick, suddenly appearing before him, 'Where's my bedroom?'

 Mr. Weller stared at his master with the most emphatic surprise; and it was not until the question had been repeated three several times, that he turned round, and led the way to the long-sought apartment. 

 'Sam, ' said Mr. Pickwick, as he got into bed, 'I have made one of the most extraordinary mistakes to-night, that ever were heard of. '

 'Werry likely, Sir, ' replied Mr. Weller, drily. 

 'But of this I am determined, Sam, ' said Mr. Pickwick, 'that if I were to stop in this house for six months, I would never trust myself about it alone, again. '

 'That's the wery prudentest resolution as you could come to, Sir, ' replied Mr. Weller. 'You rayther want somebody to look arter you, Sir, ven your judgment goes out a wisitin'. '

 'What do you mean by that, Sam?' said Mr. Pickwick. He raised himself in bed, and extended his hand, as if he were about to say something more; but suddenly checking himself, turned round, and bade his valet 'Good night. '

 'Good night, Sir, ' replied Mr. Weller. He paused when he got outside the door--shook his head--walked on--stopped--snuffed the candle--shook his head again--and finally proceeded slowly to his chamber, apparently buried in the profoundest meditation. 

It will be seen that Sam went near to being disrespectful in hissceptical view of his master's story. 

When Mrs. Sanders was examined, "the Court" put a few questions to her, as to the customs of love-making among persons of her position. She had"received love letters, like other ladies. In the course of theircorrespondence Mr. Sanders had often called her a 'duck' but never'chops' or 'tomato sauce. ' He was particularly fond of ducks. Perhapsif he had been as fond of chops and tomato sauce, he might have calledher that, as a term of affection. "

Mrs. Sanders was clearly one of the same class as Mrs. Cluppins, andchiefly deposed to the general impression in the neighbourhood that Mr. Pickwick had "offered" for Mrs. Bardell. Tupman, Snodgrass and Sam werealso examined. Being friends of the defendant, they were from the outsetassumed to be "hostile" and treated accordingly. It may be doubted, however, whether it is permissible to treat "your own witnesses" in thisrough fashion, until at least they have shown some overt signs of theirhostility, either by reserve, or an obvious determination to let aslittle as possible be extracted from them. In such case, it is usual toapply to the court for its sanction to deal with them by the severity ofcross examination. 

When Sam entered the witness box, the Serjeant addressed him: "I believeyou are in the service of Mr. Pickwick, the Defendant in this case. _Speak up_, _if you please_, _Mr. Weller_. " Sam had not had time to sayanything, so the admonition might seem superfluous. But this is awell-known device. Sam had been "briefed" to the Serjeant as a ratherdangerous witness--somewhat too wide awake. It was necessary thereforeto be short and summary with him. He thus conveyed to the jury that thisSam was one whom he could address in this curt way, and who by his low, uncertain accents might try to hide the truth. Sam, however, disconcerted the plan by his prompt, ready answer, "I _mean_ to speak up, sir. " Sam, as we know, clearly brought out the Dodson and Fogg'sdamaging assurance to Mrs. Bardell, that no costs should be charged toher personally. 

When the Plaintiff's case was closed, things did not look particularlybright for Mr. Pickwick. It had been shown on the evidence of his ownfriends that he had been surprised with his landlady in his arms; (2)That he had been corresponding with her on most familiar terms--at leastSerjeant Buzfuz had made it appear so; (3) Language that _almost_amounted to a proposal had been overheard; (4) And finally, it had beenrevealed that the Defendant had been "caught" in a lady's bedroom, at anInn, at midnight! To answer which a "strong" case was absolutelyessential. This, we grieve to say, was not forthcoming. 

THE DEFENDANT'S CASE. 

When we listen to the defence set up for Mr. Pickwick we have to lamentthat that worthy gentleman was not better served by his legal advisers. 

On the other side the shrewd Dodson and Fogg had done admirably for theirclient. They were sharp clever attornies, having a thundering, overpowering leader, and a smart, exceedingly smart junior, one of those"wide-awake" brisk fellows who really conduct the case, and will "takesilk" in a few years. This gentleman could cross-examine in capitalstyle and address the jury in a language of his own, by glances, shrugs, and remarks addressed to a witness, but intended for the jury, as theyknew perfectly well. His style, bearing, and speeches form an admirableepitome of the arts and devices of a smart counsel. There are "common"forms and Skimpin had them at his fingers' ends. As we listen, we feelhow admirably directed they were to work on the jury. 

Perker's plan of campaign as announced to Mr. Pickwick, was a poor oneenough, and showed how desperate he thought the case was. "We have onlyone (course) to adopt, my dear sir, " he said, "cross-examine thewitnesses: trust to Snubbin's eloquence, throw dust in the eyes of thejudge, and ourselves on the jury. " Brave words, but nothing of theprogramme was carried out. The cross-examination of the witnesses wasbut tamely attempted. Snubbin's eloquence was not displayed beyondmildly praising his client's good character. As for "throwing dust inthe eyes of judge, " we have seen Mr. Justice Stareleigh was much too wideawake for that; while the throwing themselves on the jury was disastrous. There were several other lines of defence which a more up-to-datesolicitor would not have overlooked. A less scrupulous man would havemade searching enquiries into Mrs. Bardell's history and character; buthis client, perhaps, would not have sanctioned this course. 

Perker is even absurd enough to talk of a _casa_, as though it were someItalian word. 

A _ca sa_ was short for a writ of _Capias ad Satisfaciendum_, which gavea warrant to the officers to seize the goods. There were various kindsof this machinery, but what affected Mr. Pickwick was a _Capias adSatisfaciendum_, to enforce attendance at the Court. The _ca sa_ alsocame after judgment, giving authority to imprison the defendant till theclaim was satisfied. 

The appearance of such great guns as the two Serjeants is accounted forby a curious rule that Serjeants only were permitted to lead in casesread in the Court of Common Pleas. {84} This strange monopoly recallsthat other one, in the Court of Arches, where the advocates and judgesused to exchange places and decide on cases in which perhaps they hadbeen advocates. These illiberal and unaccountable restrictions have beenswept away, with the Courts themselves. 

Very unusual indeed at this time was the appearance of a lawyer ofSerjeant Snubbin's class in court, and there is a well-known story how, when Charles Butler made his appearance on a special occasion, all theBar crowded in to hear him, and he had, I think, to get a gown for theoccasion. 

One is sorry to think that there are no Serjeants now, though at theIrish Bar there is one solitary survivor--Serjeant Hemphill. Gone too, are their "coifs" and other paraphernalia. With the abolition of theseparate courts they were found superfluous. We like to hear of SerjeantParry, Serjeant Ballantine, Serjeants Warren and Talford, all fourliterary men. {85}

Having made this initial blunder, Perker did not even instruct a good, smart and ready junior, but chose instead the incapable Phunky who reallybrought out that fatal piece of evidence from Winkle, which "did for" hiscase altogether. He had no business, as Boz tells us. 

This junior, we are told, had been just called, that is to say, he hadbeen only eight years at the Bar. Snubbin had never heard of him. Thelittle judge, in court, also said "that he never had the pleasure ofhearing the gentleman's name before, " a sneer he would not have venturedon to a counsel in good practice. Snubbin's remark is amusing andsarcastic; but now-a-days any barrister who had been at the Bar eightyears would not be considered as just called, for if he has been passedover for that time, he is likely never to make a figure. The rude andunbecoming sneers, both of Snubbin and the little Judge, seem amazing inour present code of legal manners. Everything at that time, however, wasmuch more "in the rough" and coarser. This was his first case; and thepoor creature is thus described:

 Although an infant barrister, he was a full-grown man. He had a very nervous manner, and a painful hesitation in his speech; it did not appear to be a natural defect, but seemed rather the result of timidity, arising from the consciousness of being "kept down" by want of means, or interest, or connection, or impudence, as the case might be. He was overawed by the Serjeant, and profoundly courteous to the attorney. 

 'I have not had the pleasure of seeing you before, Mr. Phunky, ' said Serjeant Snubbin, with haughty condescension. 

 Mr. Phunky bowed. He _had_ had the pleasure of seeing the Serjeant, and of envying him too, with all a poor man's envy, for eight years and a quarter. 

 'You are with me in this case, I understand?' said the Serjeant. 

 If Mr. Phunky had been a rich man, he would have instantly sent for his clerk to remind him; if he had been a wise one, he would have applied his fore-finger to his forehead, and endeavoured to recollect, whether, in the multiplicity of his engagements he had undertaken this one, or not; but as he was neither rich nor wise (in this sense at all events) he turned red, and bowed. 

 'Have you read the papers, Mr. Phunky?' inquired the Serjeant. 

 Here again, Mr. Phunky should have professed to have forgotten all about the merits of the case; but as he had read such papers as had been laid before him in the course of the action, and had thought of nothing else, waking or sleeping, throughout the two months during which he had been retained as Mr. Serjeant Snubbin's junior, he turned a deeper red, and bowed again. 

 'This is Mr. Pickwick, ' said the Serjeant, waving his pen in the direction in which that gentleman was standing. 

 Mr. Phunky bowed to Mr. Pickwick with a reverence which a first client must ever awaken; and again inclined his head towards his leader. 

 'Perhaps you will take Mr. Pickwick away, ' said the Serjeant, 'and--and--and--hear anything Mr. Pickwick may wish to communicate. We shall have a consultation, of course. ' With this hint that he had been interrupted quite long enough, Mr. Serjeant Snubbin, who had been gradually growing more and more abstracted, applied his glass to his eyes for an instant, bowed slightly round, and was once more deeply immersed in the case before him: which arose out of an interminable law suit, originating in the act of an individual, deceased a century or so ago, who had stopped up a pathway leading from some place which nobody ever came from, to some other place which nobody ever went to. 

With such a pair the case was literally given away. Perker should havesecured a man like the present Mr. Gill or Mr. Charles Matthews--theymight have "broken down" the witnesses, or laughed the case out of court. 

We may speculate--why did Perker make this foolish selection? As toSnubbin there was some excuse, as it was the custom that Serjeants onlyshould lead in the Court of Common Pleas. But for the choice of Phunky, Perker's stupidity alone was responsible. 

Under these conditions Serjeant Snubbin's conduct of the case and his"handling" of the witnesses was truly inefficient. He lost everyopportunity for helping his client. He "led" in a quiet, gentlemanly andalmost indifferent way. His first opportunity came in examining Mrs. Cluppins. As we have seen, she had deposed to hearing, when the door was"on the jar, " Mr. Pickwick make those speeches which Mrs. Bardell hadtaken to be a proposal. Now here was the moment to show the ambiguityand that Mr. Pickwick was speaking of his servant. It might have beenbrought out that Sam was actually engaged that day, and that she had methim on the stairs, etc. But Snubbin declined to ask her a singlequestion, saying that Mr. Pickwick admitted the accuracy of herstatement. But this was beside the matter, and the Serjeant need nothave impeached her accuracy. 

When Phunky came to Winkle, the inexperience of the tyro was shown atonce. Again, here was the moment to have extracted from the witness afull explanation of Mr. Pickwick's ambiguous speeches to Mrs. Bardell. He could have "brought out" as "clear as the light of day" that Mr. Pickwick was speaking of his engagement of a valet and have shown thatthe valet was to be engaged that very morning. It would have beenimpossible to resist such an explanation. But the thing was not thoughtof. From him also could have been drawn a vast deal favourable to Mr. Pickwick such as his disgust and annoyance at Mrs. Bardell's behaviour, his wish to be rid of her, his complaints of her conduct. But no, therewas only the foolish question as to Mr. Pickwick's being an elderly manand of fatherly ways, a topic that would by no means negative thepresumption of matrimony. But nothing could excuse the rashness ofputting a general question as to "Mr. Pickwick's behaviour towardsfemales. " No adroit counsel would run the risk of encountering a tooconscientious witness, such as Winkle proved to be and who would "let thecat out of the bag. "

As we have seen, this awkward question settled Mr. Pickwick's business. Snubbin had held him out as an elderly but benevolent being, treatingevery female he met as a daughter, never dreaming of matrimony: when lo!the whole fabric is overthrown in an instant by the luckless Winkle'sadmission!

 Amid the profound silence of the whole court Mr. Winkle faltered out that the trifling circumstance of suspicion was Mr. Pickwick's being found in a lady's sleeping apartment at midnight, which had terminated, _he believed_, in breaking off the projected marriage of the lady, and had led, _he knew_, to the whole party being forcibly carried before a magistrate. 

Thus was the defendant suddenly revealed as a Pecksniffian Lothario, andhis pretence of philanthrophy after was shewn in its true colours. Itwas impossible not to associate this with the scene with Mrs. Bardell. 

But there was an important legal "point" which one might have expectedwould have occurred to so eminent a Chamber Counsel as Serjeant Snubbin. To prove a breach of the promise, it must always be shown that thedefendant had been given an opportunity of officially refusing to fulfilit. It should have been put to him "in black and white, " "Will you marryme?" and he must have answered "No, I will not, " or something to thateffect. In default of this the defendant might plead "True I gave thepromise and it stands unbroken, for you never required me to act uponit. " Now in Mr. Pickwick's case this actually occurred. As we have seenhe left town the morning after the imputed proposal and while he wasaway, within a month, the notice of action was sent to him. Up to thattime he had not heard a word of Dodson and Fogg, or of legal proceedings. But it may be urged that Mrs. Bardell herself may have written, formulating her demands. That this was not the case is evident from Mr. Pickwick's behaviour; he did not dream of such a thing, or he would havebeen disturbed by it, or have consulted his friends about it. Had itbeen so, his high opinion of Mrs. Bardell would have been shattered. Fordid he not say on seeing Dodson and Fogg's letter, "She couldn't do it, she hasn't the heart to do it. " The only thing that makes against thistheory is his reply to Peter Magnus who asked him "had he ever proposed?"when he answered vehemently "Never, " possibly recalling Mrs. Bardell. She may however have written to him a pleading letter reminding him ofwhat he had said to her, declaring her deep-seated affection for him andinviting him to carry out what he had offered. Mr. Pickwick would havereplied in one of his amiable letters, couched in rather general terms, perhaps calling her "my dear creature, " but putting aside the wholebusiness: and there the matter probably dropped for a time. I havelittle doubt the good woman up to the last really believed that herelderly lodger intended to make her an offer of his hand, and that on hisreturn from his travels he would resume the business. Much elated bythis prospect, and most naturally too, she had told all her friends andneighbours of her approaching advancement. This Mrs. Sanders speciallydeposed to: "had always said and believed that Pickwick would marry Mrs. Bardell; knew that Mrs. Bardell being engaged to Pickwick was the currenttopic of conversation in the neighbourhood, after the fainting in July;had been told it herself by Mrs. Mudberry which kept a mangle, and Mrs. Bunkin which clear-starched, but did not see either Mrs. Mudberry or Mrs. Bunkin in court. "

Notwithstanding these speculations, it still does not appear thatPickwick made such a legal and official refusal to execute his promise aswould be sufficient to support the statement of what is now called "thesummons and plaint, " to wit, that the plaintiff being able and willing"to marry the defendant the defendant refused, etc. "

There is another matter on which hands of skilful counsel might haveaffected Mrs. Bardell and which my friend Mr. Burnand ("F. C. B. ") wasthe first to push home. At the trial, Mrs. Saunders cross-examined bySerjeant Snubbin, had to admit that her friend had an admirer--a certainBaker in the neighbourhood--who was supposed to have matrimonial designs. Pressed on this matter she thus deposed: "Had heard Pickwick ask thelittle boy how he should like to have another father. Did not know thatMrs. Bardell was at that time keeping company with the baker, but didknow that the baker was then a single man, and is now married. Couldn'tswear that Mrs. Bardell was not very fond of the baker, but should thinkthat the baker was not very fond of Mrs. Bardell, or he wouldn't havemarried somebody else. Thought Mrs. Bardell fainted away on the morningin July, because Pickwick asked her to name the day; knew that she(witness) fainted away stone dead when Mr. Saunders asked _her_ to namethe day, and believed that everybody as called herself a lady would dothe same, under similar circumstances. Heard Pickwick ask the boy thequestion about the marbles, but upon her oath did not know the differencebetween an alley tor and a commoney. 

By the COURT. --During the period of her keeping company with Mr. Sanders, had received love letters, like other ladies. In course of theircorrespondence Mr. Sanders had often called her a 'duck, ' but never'chops, ' nor yet 'tomata sauce. ' He was particularly fond of ducks. Perhaps if he had been as fond of chops and tomata sauce, he might havecalled her that, as a term of affection. 

What a point, too, Serjeant Snubbin missed here! Could he not havequoted the old verses. How he would have convulsed the court as hepoured out the apropos "for Tommy and Me!"

 Pat-a-cake, Pat-a-cake, baker's man, Bake me a cake as quick as you can; Knead it and bake it as fast as can be, And put in the oven for Tommy and me. 

Now we do not find that the Serjeant made any use of this topic in hisspeech. He might have surely urged that this "wily and experiencedwidow" was eager for a husband, that having been "thrown over" by herbaker and stung by the mortification, she resolved, as it were, torehabilitate herself and prepare this "plant" for her unsuspectinglodger. As Sir Henry Irving says in the play, "I don't like widows;_they know too much_. " F. C. B. , as I have said, has treated this bakertheme and developed it regularly in his amusing operetta "Pickwick. "

The little epitome given of Snubbin's speech shows how weak were histopics, and that he, in fact, considered that there was no defence. 

 Serjeant Snubbin then addressed the jury on behalf of the defendant; and a very long and a very emphatic address he delivered, in which he bestowed the highest possible eulogiums on the conduct and character of Mr. Pickwick. He attempted to show that the letters which had been exhibited, merely related to Mr. Pickwick's dinner, or to the preparations for receiving him in his apartments on his return from some country excursion. It is sufficient to add in general terms, that he did the best he could for Mr. Pickwick; and the best, as everybody knows on the infallible authority of the old adage, could do no more. 

This was no more than speaking "in mitigation of damages. "

Mr. Phunky made no speech, which was just as well, as he might have butdamaged the case, as no witnesses had been called on his side. For thesame reason, the Court had not the pleasure of hearing Skimpin, who wouldno doubt have "torn the Defendant's case to tatters. "

CHARGE AND VERDICT. 

The regular formula is this. The judge begins to read his notes, andmakes "running comments" as he goes along. "We have first, gentlemen, the statement of Mrs. Cluppins, she tells you, &c. Of course she comesas the friend of the Plaintiff, and naturally takes a favourable view ofher case. If you are satisfied with her statement, it is for you, gentlemen, to consider what value you will attach to it. Then we come tothe question of damages. This is entirely a matter for you. You musttake into account the position in life of the Defendant, and what thePlaintiff has lost by his default. On the other hand they must bereasonable in amount. If you believe the promise has been clearlyestablished, you should give substantial though not excessive damages, ona scale sufficient to repay the Plaintiff for the wrong. On the otherhand--should it seem to you doubtful whether the promise had beenmade--you will give the Defendant the benefit of the doubt. These arequestions entirely for you--not for me. On the whole case, you will askyourselves, whether a promise such as would satisfy reasonable men, hasbeen supported by sufficient evidence. If so, Plaintiff is entitled todamages--on the other hand, if this is not proved to your satisfaction, you will find for the Defendant. "

Mr. Justice Stareleigh, however, as we are told, then "summed up in hisold established and most approved form. He read as much of his notes ashe could decypher on so short a notice, and made running comments on theevidence as he went along. If Mrs. Bardell were right, it was perfectlyclear that Mr. Pickwick was wrong, and if they thought the evidence ofMrs. Cluppins worthy of credence, they would believe it, and if theydidn't, why they would'nt. If they were satisfied that a breach ofpromise had been committed, they would find for the Plaintiff, with suchdamages as they thought proper; and if, on the other hand, it appeared tothem that no promise of marriage had ever been given, they would find forthe Defendant, with no damages at all. " Such was this luciddirection--which is really, not in the least, an exaggeration. 

But I could fancy some acute judge of our time--such as Mr. Justice Dayor Mr. Justice Bigham--after trying this case, turning round in his seatto "charge" the jury. "Here, gentlemen, " he would tell them, "we have itclaimed on one side that a promise of marriage was made--and broken; onthe other hand the Defendant denies having ever given such a promise. The question you will have to deal with is: What was this promise, andwhen was it given? In other words, _when_ did the Defendant propose tothe lady. On the part of the Plaintiff, this was said to have been doneat the interview in Goswell Street, and two friends of thePlaintiff--Mrs. Cluppins, I think"--turning over his notes--"yes, Cluppins, and Sanders both declare positively that they overheard thelanguage of the proposal. Further, Mr. Pickwick's friends are called, toprove that the lady was in his arms, fainting. It is extraordinary thatnot one of these three gentlemen should have deposed to any statements orhave offered explanations of the situation. One witness indeed says thathe heard the Defendant remonstrate with the Plaintiff, on her hystericalbehaviour, and ask her to consider that if any one should come in, whatwould be said. Now, this is not the language of an ardent suitor, whowould rather wish than otherwise, that such endearing familiaritiesshould continue: though I don't think you need seriously accept thereading the learned Counsel, Mr. Skimpin, put on the phrase used; on theother hand, the words 'my dear creature, ' were distinctly heard. 

"There is one little incident, " the Judge might go on, "which I must notpass by, and which is not without its significance. A witness deposedthat the defendant was noted for his kindness to the Plaintiff's littleboy--that he was constantly giving him presents, and once was heard tosay to him, patting him on the head, '_how would you like to have anotherfather_?' Now, this addressed to a child of tender years does seem anodd sort of speech. Of course, it will be contended that the referencewas to the probability of his Mother marrying some one other than theDefendant: if that be the case, it seems to me rather an indelicate andreckless speech. And then it must be said, it seems inconsistent withthe amiable and benevolent character given to the Defendant to-day. Onthe other hand, if he were referring to _himself_ it will appear naturaland proper enough. And there is this to be added, that when the childhad reported the remark to his mother, which of course he did, she wouldmost reasonably begin to found hopes upon it. And then what follows, Gentlemen?--the Defendant is found holding this lady in his arms, andbecomes so demonstrative in his attentions that this very child comes toher rescue. I am inexperienced in these things--they may be innocent anddone with the purest intentions, or may not; but you, Gentlemen of theJury, are men of the world: and it is for you to put the properconstruction on them. "

"You will have noted, Gentlemen, this curious feature of the case. Noneof the witnesses were in the room when the imputed proposal was made, yetall, Cluppins, Weller, and the Defendant's three friends, _heard_ whatthe Defendant said. This suggests that he must have been very pressing, if not agitated. One of the witnesses, Winkle, I think, yes, Winkle, actually deposes to hearing the words, 'My dear creature! Composeyourself' and the like. He added he was afraid someone might come in; avery reasonable fear, Gentlemen, and well grounded: for several persons_did_ come in and it would seem with awkward results for the Defendant. But, Gentlemen, I confess that what most of all weighs with me in thiscase is the remarkable avowal wrung from a reluctant witness, of theDefendant's being surprised at midnight in a lady's bed-chamber, andbeing taken, after a serious riot, before the Magistrates. This came onme, as I saw it did on you all, as a surprise. True, it does not bear onthe question of a promise or of the breach. But still it seems a matterwhich you cannot wholly shut out from your consideration. It startled meas it did you, to find a sort of travelling philanthropist, as theDefendant Pickwick holds himself out to be, on whose mildly benevolentfeatures nature seems to have stamped rectitude and high principle, living a life of hypocrisy, taking part in midnight invasions anddaylight riots. It is one of his own friends who tells us this sadstory: and it is for you to consider whether the Plaintiff was here alsoin pursuit of yet another disreputable game, holding out marriage as thebait: I seem to speak strongly, but I feel it would be impossible towithdraw this from your consideration. 

"You may reasonably ask yourselves of what Pickwick was afraid--or whydid he dread the presence of witnesses? Was he simply beguiling thelady, as he attempted to beguile that lady at Ipswich, without 'meaningbusiness, ' as the phrase runs. I must say the Plaintiff had ratherreasonable grounds for assuming that the Defendant _did_ mean business. But all this is for you, Gentlemen, not for me. 

"Then we have the man Weller's statement--a sort of humorous stageservant, not unamusing--and of course entirely devoted to his master'sinterest. I don't think you need attach any importance to what he saidof the solicitors for the Plaintiff. When I was at the Bar, Gentlemen, attornies did much worse things than this. "

The jury consulted for only a few minutes. Perhaps, however, they wereonly discussing the amount of damages. They were certainlymoderate--laid at 1500 pounds--though had Dodson and Fogg's adviceprevailed, it should have been double. This only, by the way, is furtherproof of the amiable Mrs. Bardell's moderation and secret _tendre_ forher genial lodger. Considering that Mr. Pickwick was 'a gentleman, ' andfurther a gentleman of means, and that Mrs. Bardell was but an humblelodging-house keeper, the sum seems hardly commensurate. Dodson and Foggno doubt expected 1, 000 pounds. 

 An anxious quarter of an hour elapsed; the jury came back; the judge was fetched in. Mr. Pickwick put on his spectacles, and gazed at the foreman with an agitated countenance and a quickly beating heart. 

 'Gentlemen, ' said the individual in black, 'are you all agreed upon your verdict?'

 'We are, ' replied the foreman. 

 'Do you find for the plaintiff, gentlemen, or for the defendant?'

 'For the plaintiff. '

 'With what damages, gentlemen?'

 'Seven hundred and fifty pounds. '

 Mr. Pickwick took off his spectacles, carefully wiped the glasses, folded them into their case, and put them in his pocket; then having drawn on his gloves with great nicety, and stared at the foreman all the while, he mechanically followed Mr. Perker and the blue bag out of court. 

 They stopped in a side room while Perker paid the court fees; and here, Mr. Pickwick was joined by his friends. Here, too, he encountered Messrs. Dodson and Fogg, rubbing their hands with every token of outward satisfaction. 

 'Well, gentlemen, ' said Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Well, sir, ' said Dodson: for self and partner. 

 'You imagine you'll get your costs, don't you, gentlemen?' said Mr. Pickwick. 

 Fogg said they thought it rather probable. Dodson smiled, and said they'd try. 

 'You may try, and try, and try again, Messrs. Dodson and Fogg, ' said Mr. Pickwick vehemently, 'but not one farthing of costs or damages do you ever get from me, if I spend the rest of my existence in a debtor's prison. '

 'Ha, ha!' laughed Dodson. 'You will think better of that, before next term, Mr. Pickwick. '

 'He, he, he! We'll soon see about that Mr. Pickwick, ' grinned Mr. Fogg. 

 Speechless with indignation, Mr. Pickwick allowed himself to be led by his solicitor and friends to the door, and there assisted into a hackney-coach, which had been fetched for the purpose, by the ever watchful Sam Weller. 

 Sam had put up the steps; and was preparing to jump upon the box, when he felt himself gently touched on the shoulder; and looking round, his father stood before him. The old gentleman's countenance wore a mournful expression, as he shook his head gravely, and said, in warning accents:

 'I know'd what 'ud come 'o this here mode 'o doin' bisness. Oh Sammy, Sammy, vy worn't there a alleybi!'

We may wonder that the laborious Chamber Counsel Serjeant Snubbin did notadvise "moving for a new trial. " The verdict was clearly a wrong one--nosufficient evidence had been furnished either of a promise, or a breach. The full court would no doubt have granted the motion, and this wouldhave led to Mr. Pickwick's release, for the astute Dodson and Fogg musthave recognised their poor chances, and perhaps have required "securityfor costs, " which their client could not have given. However, the ideadid not occur to anybody. 

Since the law was changed both plaintiff and defendant may be examined insuch cases as these. What a different complexion this would have put onthe suit. The whole case would have tumbled to pieces like a pack ofcards. For Mr. Pickwick "put into the box" would have clearly shown thatall that had been thus misconstrued, was his proposal for engaging avalet, which was to have been that very morning. He would have relatedthe words of the dialogue, and the Jury would have seen at once how themistake arose. On the other hand, he would have been exposed to a severerating cross examination by the learned Serjeant--fortified by Winkle'smost damaging slip about the White Horse incident--who would have forcedout of him all the incidents. We can almost hear the Serjeant subjectthe Defendant to the torture. 

"This fellow of yours, Sir, was he recommended to you by a friend?"

"No--not at all. "

"By a Registry Office?"

"Certainly not--nothing of the kind. "

"Nothing of the kind? I suppose too low a class of place for you, eh?Come Sir!"

"I never said such a thing. "

"Nor thought it, I suppose? Come, Sir, no beating about the bush. Inplain terms, did you get him from a low Public House in the Boro'?"

Mr. Pickwick started up. 

"Never!"

"Do you deny it?"

"I never knew that the White Hart was a low Public-House, " said thewitness indignantly. 

"Never mind what you know, Sir. Did you or did you not get him fromthere?" thundered the Serjeant. 

"Of course I did. "

"Of course you did. Then what's the use of all this juggling. It doesyou no good with My Lord and the Jury. I tell you plainly, Mr. Pickwick, we mean to have all out of you. Now Sir, was this man of yours anexperienced valet?"

"Certainly not. "

"He had, of course, some training in his profession in other families?"

"Not that I know of. "

"Not that you know of. Do you dare to persist in that, Sir?"

"Why not?"

"Don't ask _me_ questions, Sir, I'm asking _you_. Do you deny, Sir, thatthe man was neither more nor less than a common Boots in the yard of aPublic House, wearing an old tattered hat and jacket--very different fromthe suit in which you have rigged him up here to-day?"

Mr. Pickwick was astonished and silent. He was suffering. He had neverdreamed of this view. 

"Why, " he said, "I suppose--"

"We want none of your supposes, Sir, answer yes or no. "

"Well he certainly was such as you describe. "

A flutter ran round the court. 

"And this creature of yours, you would impose on the Jury as a trainedman servant. You may go down Sir. "

PLEA FOR "DODSON AND FOGG. "

This famous firm of city attornies has become a bye-word in legalhistory--being considered the most notorious of practitioners for sharp, underhand, scheming practices. Boz was always vehement against theabuses of the law, but his generous ardour sometimes led him toexaggerated and wholesale statements that were scarcely well founded. This is found in some degree even in the sweeping attacks in _BleakHouse_. But he was so vivid, so persuasive, in his pictures, that therewas no appeal. 

The unreasoning fury of Mr. Pickwick is specially shown in the case ofJingle, whom he pursued with an animosity that was almost frantic. Onewould think it was some public enemy he was hunting down for the publicgood. Poor Jingle had really done nothing so monstrous, after all. Hehad "chaffed" Dr. Slammer, "run off" with the spinster aunt--nothing souncommon in those days--had been consigned to the Fleet for non-paymentof his debts, and there showed penitence and other signs of a good heart. His one serious offence was passing himself off as a naval officer, andunder an assumed name. But he had _crossed_ Mr. Pickwick--had ridiculedhim--had contemptuously sent a message to "Tuppy. " When he dared to playa practical joke on his persecutor, his infamy passed beyond bounds. Here was the key to Mr. Pickwick's nature--any lack of homage or respectwas an offence against morality. So with Dodson and Fogg. He hadsettled in his mind that a condescending visit to these gentlemen, with alittle explanation and remonstrance would completely disarm them. Hisfury on his advances being rejected was extraordinary. 

Here Boz shows, as he ever does, his profound and most logical treatmentof human character. He never goes astray, being guided by a happy andtrue instinct. Mr. Pickwick had grown to be the most inflated of men. Flattered and followed--submitted to with the greatestdeference--ordering people about--doing what he pleased--he could notstand the slightest opposition. No one was to contradict--no one toquestion even his stockings--speckled or others. Even when he wasclearly wrong, it was an affront to hint at it. He had much in commonwith that great man, Mr. Gladstone, who was the political Pickwick of histime. He was overbearing and arrogant and unrestrained, and I am afraidvindictive. Dodson and Fogg were associated with the great mortificationof his life. He could not forgive them--the very sight of them rousedhis hatred, and the having to pay them ransom stung him to fury. Allwhich is most natural and yet unexpected. 

The popular and genial Sir Frank Lockwood was almost the first to putforward a plea in abatement of prejudice for the firm. He showed thatthey were not much below the usual type of middle-class solicitors. Whatthey did was in the ordinary course. With Mr. Pickwick they were mostforbearing, and even indulgent. There was one rather doubtful passage, but even here he offers extenuation. This was their treatment of poorRamsey, which, at first sight, seems very bad indeed. 

 'There was such a game with Fogg here, this mornin', ' said the man in the brown coat, 'while Jack was upstairs sorting the papers, and you two were gone to the stamp-office. Fogg was down here opening the letters, when that chap we issued the writ against at Camberwell, you know, came in--what's his name again?'

 'Ramsey, ' said the clerk who had spoken to Mr. Pickwick. 

 'Ah, Ramsey--a precious seedy-looking customer. 'Well, sir, ' says old Fogg, looking at him very fierce--you know his way--'well, Sir, have you come to settle?' 'Yes, I have, Sir, ' said Ramsey, putting his hand in his pocket, and bringing out the money, 'the debt two-pound ten, and the costs three pound five, and here it is, sir;' and he sighed like bricks, as he lugged out the money, done up in a bit of blotting paper. Old Fogg looked first at the money, and then at him, and then he coughed in his rum way, so that I knew something was coming. 'You don't know there's a declaration filed, which increases the costs materially, I suppose?' said Fogg. 'You don't say that Sir, ' said Ramsey, starting back; 'the time was only out last night, Sir. ' 'I do say it, though, ' said Fogg, 'my clerk's just gone to file it. Hasn't Mr. Jackson gone to file that declaration in Bullman and Ramsey, Mr. Wicks?' Of course I said yes, and then Fogg coughed again, and looked at Ramsey. 'My God!' said Ramsey; 'and here have I nearly driven myself mad, scraping this money together, and all to no purpose. ' 'None at all, ' said Fogg, coolly; 'so you had better go back and scrape some more together, and bring it here in time. ' 'I can't get it, by God, ' said Ramsey, striking the desk with his fist. 'Don't bully me, Sir, ' said Fogg, getting into a passion on purpose. 'I am not bullying you, Sir, ' said Ramsey. 'You are, ' said Fogg; 'get out, Sir, get out of this office, Sir, and come back, Sir, when you know how to behave yourself. ' Well, Ramsey tried to speak, but Fogg wouldn't let him, so he put the money in his pocket, and sneaked out. The door was scarcely shut, when old Fogg turned round to me, with a sweet smile on his face, and drew the declaration out of his coat pocket. 'Here, Wicks, ' says Fogg, 'take a cab, and go down to the Temple as quick as you can, and file that. The costs are quite safe, for he's a steady man with a large family, at a salary of five-and-twenty shillings a week, and if he gives us a warrant of attorney, as he must in the end, I know his employers will see it paid; so we may as well get all we can out of him, Mr. Wicks; it's a Christian act to do it, Mr. Wicks, for with his large family and small income, he'll be all the better for a good lesson against getting into debt, --won't he, Mr. Wicks, won't he?'--and he smiled so goodnaturedly as he went away, that it was delightful to see him. 'He is a capital man of business, ' said Wicks, in a tone of the deepest admiration, 'capital, isn't he?'

 The other three cordially subscribed to this opinion, and the anecdote afforded the most unlimited satisfaction. 

 'Nice men these here, Sir, ' whispered Mr. Weller to his master; 'wery nice notion of fun they has, Sir. '

Sir F. Lockwood, by the way, offers one of the most amusing proofsconceivable, of the convincing power of "Pickwick, " which is constantlytaking us out of the world of fiction, into that of the daily livinglife. He speaks of the cruel trick played upon the unfortunate Ramsey, who came to pay his bill of costs, and was told that these were out ofdate, had been swelled by subsequent proceedings. An affidavit had beensworn--which, after he left the house, Wicks, the clerk, was sent off toswear--Then, Sir Frank, adds: "After all, this is merely given _as thestatement of Wicks_--_on whose testimony not much reliance can beplaced_. " As though Wicks were some living witness, "erect upon twolegs, " whom he had been examining in Court!

It must, however, be recollected that this was an _exparte_ story. Wicks, as Sir F. Lockwood hints, may have coloured it up, to amuse hisbrethren. The truth is these poor helpless debtors, who fall into thehands of legal "sharks" and money-lenders, have _their_ tricks also. They will often "do" those they employ if they can. And further, letthis be considered. Before Ramsey paid his visit the affidavit _had_been prepared, and was actually in Fogg's pocket. Such affidavit wouldnot be allowed for in the costs unless necessary to the case, so thatFogg's statement that it had been filed was very near the truth. Perkerhimself was playing the same game of hide and seek with anotherunfortunate--one Watty--who was trying to see him, and learn somethingabout his case, but was always put off with the excuse or falsehood, thatPerker was out, though he was within. But then, "Perker was anhonourable man. "

Boz lets us know, through Sam, how the case reached Dodson and Fogg. Hespeaks of "the kind generous people o' the perfession 'as sets theirclerks to work to find out little disputes among their neighbours andacquaintances as wants settlin' by means of law suits. " This system, however, cannot be checked, and "the speculative attorney" even in ourtime still flourishes. 

It was really not a question whether Mr. Pickwick would "indict them fora conspiracy, " because they acted as solicitors against him, but whetherthey would bring an action against _him_ on their own account. Allthrough, Mr. Pickwick's behaviour to them had been outrageous. He choseto assume, quite gratuitously that it was they--not Mrs. Bardell--who gotup the case; that they had worked on her for their own nefarious ends. Nothing could be more absurd. The landlady was eager enough to protecther own interests--her female friends worked on her, and the loss of sovaluable a lodger, which the incident must have entailed, inflamed hermore. We can see from Sam's interview with her that she was at last, though at first reluctant, determined to have her rights. But Mr. Pickwick acting on this assumption addressed the firm, from the first tothe last in the most scurrilous language. He called them "robbers, swindlers, --a brace of pettifogging scoundrels!" Shocking andungentlemanly terms, and what is worse, actionable. Yet the pairreceived this abuse with infinite good temper and restraint, merelysecuring a witness who should listen, and threatening the speaker withlegal penalties. 

And why did they not take this course? Well, they had to suspendproceedings until Mrs. Bardell's action was settled, when on receivingtheir costs they were desirous to part in good humour. But Mr. Pickwickwas so furious at being invited to shake hands with them, that he againbroke out with coarse abuse, "Robbers!" "Robbers!" calling it after themdown the stairs. Why did they not take action on this? Perhaps theywere afraid; as Mr. Pickwick had shewn himself such a doughty andunyielding fighter--going to prison rather than pay. Perhaps theythought he might get the better of them again. 

We have very little evidence as to what was the scale of fees in use inthese days. They were of course far lower than they are now, afterallowances even for the lower cost of living. To-day, the fees toCounsel alone would have absorbed considerably more than Dodson andFogg's whole bill of costs. A nice point is, could Mr. Pickwick'sirregular interview with Serjeant Snubbin be considered something in theway of a consultation? Here were Counsel, Solicitor and Client: theSerjeant gave up a portion of his valuable time and, further, the juniorcounsel was summoned specially from his chambers to supply his "adviceand opinion. " Mr. Pickwick ought surely to have to pay for his whim. And the bill of costs that these "sharks" of attornies sent in! It wasastonishingly moderate. For writ, service of subpoenas, hunting upevidence, consultation, fees to counsel, fees for the day, retainers, etc. , --the sum of 120 pounds was all that was asked. 

Imagine Messrs. Lewis and Lewis sending in such a demand at the end of atrial which it had taken them nearly a year to get ready. In our time itcould hardly be done under 1, 000 pounds. Perker, by the way, told hisclient that on payment of the costs both of Plaintiff and Defendent, intothe hands of "these sharks" he would get his release. With muchindulgence--the attornies--allowed him to leave the prison on his bareundertaking to pay. And it is not clear why he should pay his own coststo them, and not to Perker. And they were _not_ paid for sometime. Mr. Pickwick's own costs must have been small. He had no witnesses. Perkerwould not have made a hand of him, and I fancy he would have got off forninety pounds, or a hundred pounds. There was, however, the fees of theSpecial Jury, so he would have to pay, say, 220 pounds. 

THE COGNOVIT. 

Perker, it has been shown, was not a very brilliant solicitor, and hisviews on the trial were somewhat cloudy. When he was urging his clientto leave the Fleet he threw out some equally shadowy and ill-informednotions as to what might be done in the way of punishing the nefarioussolicitors, Dodson and Fogg, "those Freeman's Court Sharks. "

His great charge was that they had got a _cognovit_, or undertaking topay their costs out of Mrs. Bardell--their own client! Mr. Pickwickrefused to pay them--why should not she? The poor woman had "blabbed" toSam, a careless and natural assurance of theirs, that they would becontent to get them from Mr. Pickwick--a thing many a firm would do. ButPerker here sees a regular conspiracy. "I cannot undertake to saywhether the wording of the cognovit, the nature of the ostensibleconsideration and the proof we can get together about the whole conductof the suit, _will be sufficient to justify an indictment forconspiracy_. "

It is impossible to understand this bit of legal jargon. "The wording ofthe cognovit"--one could speculate on _that_ without seeing it. (2) "Thenature of the ostensible consideration" was not far to seek--it beingwork and labour done for the Plaintiff. And again, supposing they hadpromised her to get them solely from Mr. Pickwick--Sam's revelation ofthis, in open court, and its reception with laughter, showed what wasthought of it. So which of the two courses were they to adopt? (3) And"the proof we may get together about the whole conduct of the suit. "This "whole conduct" was perfectly regular. So the Judge thought--so didthe jury. The case was proved by Pickwick's own friends. As we know, however, the firm took no steps to obtain satisfaction, but there cannotbe the slightest doubt that they would have "recovered damages. " Wedoubt if Mr. Pickwick would have gone to the Fleet for the second timerather than pay. 

Perker's suspicions as to the _Cognovit_ obtained by Dodson and Fogg wereshrewd, and certain enough, though he could not have seen the document. The suspicions were well warranted by the state of the Law, which becamean instrument in the hands of grasping attorneys. By it the client wasmade to sign an acknowledgment, and offering no defence to a supposedaction, --say for costs--brought against him, Judgment was then marked. 

This offered a great temptation to the unscrupulous. Mrs. Bardell, nodoubt, signed with light heart, not knowing what she was doing, and beingtold that it was merely a matter of form. Various enactments attemptedto protect the client--one being passed some four or five years beforethe trial Bardell v. Pickwick, requiring the _Cognovit_ to be regularlyfiled within twenty-one days; more than ten years later it was required, that the client's signing such a thing should have no force in Law, unless he was represented by another solicitor. 

The matter, as we know, was compromised with Dodson and Fogg, so therewas no need to scrutinize the _Cognovit_. No doubt Perker was enabled toput pressure on the firm by hinting at such proceedings. 

The damages, 750 pounds, were certainly moderate, and would not have beenreduced by the Court on an application to set them aside as "excessive. "The good woman was quite at her ease, being no doubt certain that Mr. Pickwick, at last, must give in. She could even enjoy the society of herfriends and make the celebrated junketting to the "Spaniards. " The firmtook another view and grew tired of waiting; or they were sagaciousenough to see that the arrest of their client was about the best methodof putting pressure on Mr. Pickwick. In this connection, it may be notedthat Jackson's over zeal in the transaction might have led to an actionagainst his employers; for he arrested not only Mrs. Bardell, but herfriends, Mrs. Sanders and Mrs. Cluppins. The prison gates were actuallyshut on them. "Safe and sound, " said the Bailiff. "Here we are atlast, " said Jackson, "all right and tight. "

True, Mrs. Bardell put under her hand in her appealing letter to Mr. Pickwick, that "this business was from the very first fomented andencouraged and brought about by these men, " but this is not much; for theview only occurs to her when her operations had completely failed andrecoiled on her own head with such disastrous result. The firm'sbusiness was to persuade her that she had a good case, and the Jury'sverdict proved that she had. Had Mr. Pickwick given in and paid, shewould have had no scruples. One cannot, at the same time, but admire theingenuity of the author, in bringing such a Nemesis on her. Dodson andFogg, we are told, "continue in business from which they realise a largeincome, and in which they are universally considered among the sharpestof the sharp. "

At the last interview, at Perker's, when the costs were paid, one mighthave expected Mr. Pickwick to behave with a certain disdainful dignity. He was beaten and had paid over the stakes, and could afford to treat hisenemy with contempt. Not so. The partners held out the olive branch byalluding to the way they had passed by his unmannerly attacks on them. "I beg to assure you, sir, I bear you no ill will or vindictive feelingfor sentiments you thought proper to express of us in our office, " andthe other partner said, "I hope you don't think quite so ill of us, etc. "This was rather gentlemanly and becoming. One offered his hand. But Mr. Pickwick broke out in a perfect fury. They had assumed a tone offorgiveness which was "an excess of impudence. " He had been "the victimof their plots and conspiracies. " They had imprisoned and robbed him. It was "insolent familiarity. " At last he said, "_You are a well-matchedpair of mean_, _rascally_, _pettifogging robbers_. " This sentence herepeated three times, and the words "Robbers" he shouted after them manytimes over the stairs. 

Sharping attornies! Why, a real sharping firm would have forced fromtheir client advances of fee, "cash out of pocket, " have made her give aBill of Sale on her lease and goods, and have fairly stripped her ofeverything before the case began. Of the damages--had they got them--shewould have seen but little. 

The _Cognovit_ that was extracted from Mrs. Bardell was anacknowledgement, as we have seen, which entitled them to enter upjudgment just as if a trial had taken place. In the Oxford greatDictionary, it reads quaintly to find Mrs. Bardell's cognovit quoted asan illustration of the legal meaning. 

The Turnkey, on her arrest, had told Sam that she had been brought to theFleet, "on a Cognovit for costs, " Sam imparted this news to Job Trotter, and sent him off, hot foot, to Perker in Montague Place. This outcast, was able to tell him, "it seems they got a _Cognovit_ out of her for theamount of the costs, directly after the trial!"

Boz, on this occasion, gives us a happy glimpse of Solicitor life. 

 Mr. Perker had a dinner party that day, which was certified by the lights in the drawing-room windows, the sound of an improved grand piano, and an improveable cabinet voice issuing therefrom; and a rather overpowering smell of meat which prevaded the steps and entry. In fact, a couple of very good country agencies happening to come up to town at the same time, an agreeable little party had been got together to meet them, comprising Mr. Snicks the Life Office Secretary, Mr. Prosee the eminent counsel, three solicitors, one commissioner of bankrupts, a special pleader from the Temple, a small-eyed peremptory young gentleman, his pupil, who had written a lively book about the law of demises, with a vast quantity of marginal notes and references; and several other eminent and distinguished personages. From this society little Mr. Perker detached himself on his clerk being announced in a whisper; and repairing to the dining-room, there found Mr. Lowten and Job Trotter looking very dim and shadowy by the light of a kitchen candle, which the gentleman who condescended to appear in plush shorts and cottons for a quarterly stipend, had, with a becoming contempt for the clerk and all things appertaining to 'the office, ' placed upon the table. 

 'Now Lowten, ' said little Mr. Perker, shutting the door, 'what's the matter? No important letter come in a parcel, is there?'

Do we not seem to be present? We can never pass by Russell Squarewithout calling up the scene. Note, too, the components of that legaldinner. Poor Sir F. Lockwood used to declare that he relished "Mr. Prosee, the eminent counsel, " more than any one of Boz's legal circle. Yet these five words are all we know of him. But Sir Frank hadimagination, and like some of us could read between the lines, or rather, between the words. Here was a prominent member of the Bar--was he K. C. ?a triton among the minnows--therefore heading the table, listened to withreverence as he told of the judges, possibly of "old Stareleigh's" lastexhibition of petulance--"with it's high time for him to go, etc. " Butif he had not silk, why did not Perker retain him instead of theincapable Phunky, whom he did _not_ ask on this occasion. "I gave thechap a good chance, but he destroyed my whole case!" "Catch me lettinghim put his legs under my mahogany. " Among the guests was that"small-eyed, peremptory young gentleman"--the special pleader's pupil. What a capital sketch has Boz given of him. "He had written a _lively_book about the law of demises, with a vast quantity of marginal notes andreferences. " He had come with his teacher, who was no doubt highlydeferental to Mr. Prosee, but enough, the peremptory young gentleman mayhave partly "tackled" the great man on some point of practice. The goodcountry agencies must have gone home delighted with their evening. 

But Mr. Prosee may be brought into somewhat closer communication with thecase. At Perker's dinner the gentlemen had gone up to the drawing room, when Perker was called down to hear the news of Mrs. Bardell's arrest. Mr. Prosee was left expatiating to the circle on some beautiful "point, "and when Perker returned how likely that he should tell of hisextraordinary client who had preferred to go to prison rather than paythe costs of a suit, "and here, " he would go on, "is the drollest sequelyou ever heard, &c. "

"An odd unusual thing, " Mr. Prosee would say. "Plaintiff and Defendant, both in jail together! I never heard the like. " There would be muchlaughter at the novel situation. Thus the _cognovit_ would come up andMr. Prosee gravely say, "nothing will be done till an Act of Parliamentis passed. The client should be protected by a fresh solicitor. " Onwhich the young author of the treatise on Demises would have something tosay in his best fashion; for the _cognovit_ might be taken to be a sortof demise. "I doubt Mr. Prosee, if your suggestion would work. As Itake it, sir, etc. "

RELEASE FROM THE FLEET. 

But the circumstances connected with Mr. Pickwick's release from theFleet, show the adroitness and ability of Dodson in a high degree. Itwill be recollected that when Job rushed with the news to Perker, thatgentleman and his clerk broke out into raptuous admiration. 

 'Now, Lowten, ' said little Mr. Perker, shutting the door, 'what's the matter? No important letter come in a parcel, is there?'

 'No, sir, ' replied Lowten. 'This is a messenger from Mr. Pickwick, sir. '

 'From Pickwick, eh?' said the little man, turning quickly to Job. 'Well; what is it?'

 'Dodson and Fogg have taken Mrs. Bardell in execution for her costs, sir, ' said Job. 

 'No!' exclaimed Perker, putting his hands in his pockets, and reclining against the sideboard. 

 'Yes, ' said Job. 'It seems they got a cognovit out of her for the amount of 'em, directly after the trial. '

 'By Jove!' said Perker, taking both hands out of his pockets and striking the knuckles of his right against the palm of his left, emphatically, 'those are the cleverest scamps I ever had anything to do with!'

 'The sharpest practitioners _I_ ever knew, sir, ' observed Lowten. 

 'Sharp!' echoed Perker. 'There's no knowing where to have them. '

 'Very true, sir, there is not, ' replied Lowten; and then both master and man pondered for a few seconds, with animated countenances, as if they were reflecting upon one of the most beautiful and ingenious discoveries that the intellect of man had ever made. When they had in some measure recovered from their trance of admiration, Job Trotter discharged himself of the rest of his commission. Perker nodded his head thoughtfully, and pulled out his watch. 

Now to the superficial this seemed to be evaded by the art of the firm in"getting the cognovit out of her. " But this was an ordinary, vulgarstroke--which anyone could have done. Their policy went far deeper, andthis Perker was acute enough to recognize. There was no object inputting Mrs. Bardell into the Fleet. 

They could no more get their costs out of her, than they could get themout of Mr. Pickwick. She had nothing but her few "sticks" of furniture, worth say 50 pounds. But the astute fellows saw what pressure could beput on the benevolent nature of Mr. Pickwick, who could not endure that arespectable woman should be exposed to the contamination of a debtor'sprison. And their sagacity was to be justified, and on the very nextday, too. 

It is curious, however, that no mention is made of Mrs. Bardell'srelease. It, of course, took place before Mr. Pickwick's. Here againDodson and Fogg behaved very fairly, for they allowed both her and Mr. Pickwick to be released, without receiving payment, but simply on "anunderstanding" by Perker. As it turned out, indeed, they were not paidfor some weeks. 

The processes by which Mr. Pickwick was got into the Fleet werecomplicated enough, _Habeas Corpus_, appearing before functionaries, etc. But it is odd that in cases of persons of lower degree these seemed notto be necessary. We do not hear of them in Sam's instance. While Mrs. Bardell, was taken straight from "the Spaniards, " to the prison door, shewas not even formally arrested by the Bailiff, though he was inattendance. He sat afar off at Hampstead, taking his drink--and on thebox during the drive. She might be said to have been arbitrarily takento the prison by Jackson--without a legal warrant. Had not the businessbeen compromised, some other astute firm of attorneys might have foundsubject for an action against Dodson and Fogg. 

Another of the humorous incidents connected with the case is old Weller'sfirm persuasion that Mr. Pickwick was to "stand his trial, " as though hewere indicted for some criminal offence. We find him always astray as towhen he was to be "tried, " etc. This is a most natural impression amongthe lower classes, who are not very clear as to the distinction betweencivil and criminal process, being most familiar with the latter. In thesame spirit is his humorous suggestion of securing an _alibi_, as thebest method of getting Mr. Pickwick off. "O Sammy, Sammy, vy worn'tthere a alleybi!"

 * * * * *

Such is "The Trial in Pickwick. "

Is there any writer, now living, I may be asked, who could furnish such apicture as this, one so full of reality and true humour, of one of ourmodern Courts of Justice? The answer must be that it would be idle tolook for such a person. There are thousands who could supply minutedrawings in which not a single detail would be omitted. But the piercingto the essence, the happy generalization, the knowledge of the truepoints of character, these would be sought in vain. 

Footnotes:

{26} So confused is the chronology of _Pickwick_, that it is difficultto fix the exact date of the Trial. Boz, writing some ten years afterthe event, seems to have got a little confused and uncertain as to theexact year of the Trial. He first fixed the opening of the story in1817: but on coming to the compromising incident in Goswell Street, whichoccurred only a few weeks later, he changed the year to 1827. ThenJingle's anachronism of the French Revolution of July suggested that thenew date would not do. So 1830 was next adopted. But this did not endthe matter, for in the "errata" we are directed to change this date backagain to 1827. And so it now stands. The Trial therefore really tookplace on April 1, 1828. 

{84} Seven years after the Trial this monopoly was taken away from theSerjeants--namely in 1834: then capriciously given back to them, andfinally abolished in 1840. 

{85} I have heard from the daughter of Mr. Chapman, the originalpublisher of _Pickwick_, that Talfourd revised and directed the "Trial. "On one occasion Boz was dining with him when the proof was brought in, with some legal mistakes noted by Talfourd. Boz left the table and putit right.